Is it true that pair bonding is affected much more in one gender than the other?

Brilliant-Block-8200 · 2025-10-27T15:49:26+00:00

I’m not sure if it affects pair bonding or not. But I do think that it affects how they see sex and intimacy. I have a low ‘body count’ and I don’t want a man with a high ‘body count’ since we’d be incompatible. For me it’s a dealbreaker

Competitive_Lion_260 · 2025-10-27T18:25:28+00:00

For the 10000th time, women do care about that just as much as men do.

Sexual partner number and distribution over time affect long-term partner evaluation

Men and Women with Multiple Sex Partners Are Less Desirable as Long-term Mates.

A caricature of evolutionary psychology is that men avoid women who have had multiple sex partners, but women do not do the same to men.

New research from 11 countries across five continents (Europe, North America, South America, Asia, and Australia) addresses this question, finding that the number of previous sexual partners matters for both men and women, and that this is influenced by the national culture.

The study consisted of a total of 5,331 participants.

In line with previous research, the authors of the new study found that in contemporary societies all over the world, both men and women were less willing to enter into a committed long-term relationship with a person with a large number of previous sexual partners, and that the larger that number, the less willing they were to consider that person as a good long-term mate.

Sex differences were non-existent or minimal. There was no evidence that the sexual history of a suitor was judged more harshly by men than by women.

Except men in China showed greater willingness to marry a woman with 12 or 36 previous sex partners than Chinese women.

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-025-12607-1

https://ifstudies.org/blog/men-and-women-with-multiple-sex-partners-are-less-desirable-as-long-term-mates

attendquoi · 2025-10-27T16:11:15+00:00

Any man who genuinely believes that humans pair bond is too poorly educated to fuck or date.

Lysa_Bell · 2025-10-27T17:02:38+00:00

"She ruined her pair bonding ability" is just an excuse weird guys use when they learn they have to put in effort into a relationship. They think they can treat women like shit if she "pair bonds" to them.

Gravel_Roads · 2025-10-27T15:54:58+00:00

There’s no such thing as pair bonding. Humans are not ducks, nor are we magical telepathic creatures that form psychic connections with the first person we have sex with.

Humans mate based on who they like, not who they are psychically bound to.

People who believe in pairbonding don’t understand how relationships work or why people care about others. They think there has to be a magical mechanism that “makes” you like someone, and if you can’t “make” yourself like someone, it’s because you’re BROKEN and unable to BOND because you had SEX over the course of your life.

If pairbonding actually happened, people would all be married to the first person they lost their virginity to.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2025-10-27T16:07:13+00:00

Pair bonding isn’t a thing unless you’re a migratory bird.

Stop listening to truck drivers with pseudo scientific arguments they plagiarized tell you about “evo psycology”

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SleepyPoemsin2020 · 2025-10-27T15:56:38+00:00

However, women don't mind of men sleep around a lot and don't seem to think it will ruin their pair bonding abilities.

I recognize that this is common rhetoric in these spaces. But this really isn't reflected in a lot of semi recent to recent studies which show both sexes express reluctance to get into a long-term relationship with someone who has an extensive sexual history.

I personally do care if men sleep around a lot and and would not want to be in a relationship with such a man, should I ever return to dating. *But not because of pair bonding. I have seen no evidence to show this is a thing with humans

Poor_Olive_Snook · 2025-10-27T19:23:21+00:00

Hi I'm Science and I didn't say any of that

ThatBitchA · 2025-10-27T16:29:05+00:00

Pair bonding isn't real.

Someone having sex doesn't mean they can't have relationships.

This is just another made-up thing in attempts to shame women for having and enjoying sex.

oppositegeneva · 2025-10-27T17:48:53+00:00

However, women don't mind of men sleep around a lot and don't seem to think it will ruin their pair bonding abilities.

Men are just more vocal about it.

The women who don’t care about a man’s body count are the women with higher body counts.

Lost_Reaction_5489 · 2025-10-27T16:09:19+00:00

No, that's not what the data says. The CDC's National Survey of Family Growth show a 1-3% difference in divorce rates in each different amount of sexual partner category regardless of gender. And that the overall jump in divorce rate from 0-1 partners to 10+ partners is 10% in men and 13% in women. So nearly identical.

p_fulga · 2025-10-27T16:17:24+00:00

Pair bonding seems silly. We're humans. We're not some one and done kinda species. And when it comes to dating its extremely rare any of us are ever going to get it right the first time. There will be incompatibilities, impassable arguments, differing life goals and love languages, mistakes, betrayals, so much. I don't think that makes most people any less capable of loving those who come next.

I do believe you can absolutely find your one, something like a soulmate, but I don't think human love is some avian-esk pair bonding thing.

stockingsinrainboots · 2025-10-27T16:10:27+00:00

In my experience, adult men don't even care enough to ask about "body count", let alone feel concerned about its effect on pair bonding.

AdHistorical3313 · 2025-10-28T12:00:06+00:00

I think there is some truth to there being asymmetrical effects in the phenomenon of one night stands within the genders and I think people that consider this 'just a cultural stereotype' are pretty naive and probably have quite limited experiences of how men and women behave and act in these contexts.

In fact, another user in here was saying simulaneously that women that have had more sexual partners (a) divorce significantly more, and (b) it is not related to their compromised ability to pair bond - I think that's ridiculous; if you lose the emotional depth and significance of sex and just see it as a transaction of two bodies that it going to reek havoc in your ability to settle down with another human being. A comparison to this is like if your brain stops viewing human beings in a social context but only materially as these walking automatons in fresh without feelings and emotions of their own.

To discount the seriousness of sexual bonding has a very 'sex ain't nothing, man' faux chillness that humans don't naturally have; our minds and bodies flood with chemicals and effects from sexual attraction/stimulation and there's data to suggest women are more sensitive to this than men: it isn't meant to be numbed. Men are less selective with sex than women so very obviously if women numb this out it is going to be waay more significant with pair bonding. I seriously can't understand how people can't comprehend that.

PassengerCultural421 · 2025-10-27T16:09:10+00:00

Pair bonding is just more gender woo woo shit. It's no different from bs like "positive masculinity." Both are vague concepts dressed up to sound scientific while really enforcing social norms.

LaFrescaTrumpeta · 2025-10-28T10:16:47+00:00

google the sexual double standard, this is one of the most classic examples of cultural sexism there is

cb8585b · 2025-10-27T16:17:41+00:00

Anyone who believes in pair bonding either hasn’t dated, had sex or been in a long term relationship.

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Outside_Memory5703 · 2025-10-27T16:47:39+00:00

Men don’t like non-virgins because women are usable objects, not because they want to bond with them

P1anth0 · 2025-10-27T17:04:38+00:00

People used to understand that people who chase novelty will be more likely to cheat because they will be less likely to be satisfied settling down with one person. Woketards and feminists don’t like common sense because of what that says about them so now they deny science that indicates sex is a pair bonding experience.

Women care less about men’s past but that doesn’t mean men are unaffected. Anybody with a brain would have some level of care about a persons past including their sexual history. My girlfriends who were worth a damn cared.. Men who had standards and weren’t trash cared..

You can still pair bond having a past but there are consequences one of those is long term relationship success.. People who have 20+ partners have a relationship fail rate of 50%.. Numbers don’t lie..

Objective_Ad_6265 · 2025-10-27T21:20:13+00:00

Everyone is ruined by promiscouity.

No_Self_2165 · 2025-10-27T15:52:20+00:00

Imagine you are a woman, wherever you go there is love and affection and sexual access from hot guys.

Could you be able to bond with another regular guy?

The abundance of love makes it less valuable for women therefore with each number of body adding up it will diminish her ability to love the next one little by little. Because the process itself is dehumanizing. Men slowly become assets; height, net value, penis size, etc. rather than another human being with feelings.

Patrickstarho · 2025-10-27T15:42:53+00:00

I just think women who sleep around a lot will not give their sexual best to the man they marry.

Idk about pair bonding

SexCrispies · 2025-10-27T15:45:46+00:00

It does NOT ruin their pair bonding ability.

It increases the chance for divorce. In both sexes.

petellapain · 2025-10-27T16:27:37+00:00

Men are less affected, but admitting this does not serve women, so you won't find any agreement on this subject. It serves women more to insist that there is no difference between the sexes, regardless of evidence to the contrary

Smart-Mall4110 · 2025-10-27T16:14:57+00:00

No, but there is a link between relational satisfaction in both males and females and sexual partners. Now, it could be that those who are more promiscuous are less happy in general and so seeking others out is a way to avoid perceived negative feelings.

SecondEldenLord · 2025-10-27T16:24:07+00:00

Women definitely see sex differently than men. A man can fuck and forget about the girls because men fuck anything but for a woman to fuck a man she has to feel something.

kvakerok_v2 · 2025-10-27T16:23:45+00:00

Not true iirc, pair bonding affects both sexes equally, however the big difference in the sexes is that men can bang another woman and not feel anything towards her, while they're in an LTR, while women are more likely to get emotionally attached to their affair partner.

Title	Is it true that pair bonding is affected much more in one gender than the other?
Author	harmonica2
Upvotes	0
Comments	206
Date	October 27, 2025 2:47 PM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ohge5o/is_it_true_that_pair_bonding_is_affected_much/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/is-it-true-that-pair-bonding-is-affected-much-more.1565130 https://theredarchive.com/post/1565130

Comments

For the 10000th time, women do care about that just as much as men do.

Sexual partner number and distribution over time affect long-term partner evaluation