Most men have low or zero standards?

wtknight · 2022-08-24T18:10:21+00:00

Re-flaired as CMV as this post is making an affirmative claim.

JumboJetz · 2022-08-24T16:27:08+00:00

Standards for casual sex seem to certainly be a bit lower in general. But they aren’t zero. I had a 50 year old woman (I’m early 30s) express the desire to have sex with me, I turned her down (she catfished me a bit her pictures were when she was younger and her body has changed a lot). Even though we say men swipe right on 60% of Tinder profiles vs. Like 5% for women, that still does mean that men think at least 40% of women are so unattractive they wouldn’t even want to open the door to letting her message him potentially for sex.

Flightlessbirbz · 2022-08-24T18:57:21+00:00

most women in this world are considered attractive

Do you mean most non-overweight college girls are considered somewhat attractive? With statements like this, I always want to know, what do you think the average woman looks like?

Men are not very picky about who they’ll have sex with, this is true. But most men’s standards for who they will actually be in a relationship with, be seen in public with, introduce to friends and family, etc., are much higher than for a hookup.

DorianneGrey · 2022-08-24T17:42:27+00:00

Men will literally fuck warm fruit so...their "standards" for sex or servitude don't really have a corollary in the average woman's life.

That__EST · 2022-08-24T16:57:23+00:00

Men are less picky about who they are willing to have sex with. But they are very picky about who they choose to be publicly and socially paired with.

todo_pasa_ · 2022-08-24T18:42:01+00:00

Unless the woman is fat then all of the sudden there are standards

sarkington · 2022-08-24T17:37:18+00:00

For sex

And for doormats

KirthWGersen · 2022-08-24T16:24:18+00:00

Everyone has different standards.

Guys who easily attract women turn often women down for physical and behavioural reasons, or simply because they have something better to do.

Some just take what they can get when the opportunity arises.

But there is no doubt men are less picky than women in general.

John_Oakman · 2022-08-24T16:37:29+00:00

Most males probably have low/zero standards, however most [relevant] men have high standards. that's part of the issue (and along with that treating all males as one interchangeable bloc on the macro scale, which obviously isn't the case in reality).

toasterchild · 2022-08-24T16:42:09+00:00

From what I witness, the men who I know who have more standards and openly communicate them have an easier time finding relationships. When I am dating as a woman I am looking for a man who knows what he wants, if a guy is open to anything it's a red flag. He either has no real personality or he's socially awkward and desperate for any attention... not something i'm interested in.

purplish_possum · 2022-08-24T16:34:31+00:00

For casual I'm pretty damn flexible. She has to be minimally attractive and not a horrible person.

For LTR/marriage she needs to be a lot more. She needs to be smart and educated (minimum of a 4-year degree from a good school). She also needs to be established in her career (i.e. minimum 5 years experience and 100K income).

A LTR/marriage partner needs to able to make my life better -- emotionally, sexually, and materially.

Sad_Entertainer6312 · 2022-08-24T16:53:26+00:00

The reality is that most men are fairly simple creatures. They want to get through life, and be happy and content. They don't always need more, more, more. Some do, but most don't.

Men want loyalty, to be taken care of, affection (regular sex) and to be appreciated, and peace. If you as a woman can provide these things then most other variables aren't essential.

? If men don't have standards like women have of: height

Many men prefer a taller woman but it's not essential.

salary,

It's a bonus if the primary things are covered, but not essential

if the woman has a college degree or not,

Again not essential, but a bonus for some

confidence,

Not an essential but a big bonus

sexual performance,

Not an essential but a huge bonus.

if a woman drives or has a car, if a woman has her own house or lives with roommates,

Not an essential. Her own placebos own home is a bonus. But if she can just come to your place it's unnecessary.

Maybe some men have more than one standars but not a whole list.

Most men do have standards, but once the essentials are covered fulfilling the standards are just bonuses.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2022-08-24T16:55:36+00:00

Most dudes do have standards. Most dudes also have preferences. Alcohol and dry spells sometimes loosen those things. But I can’t think of any successful dude that didn’t have both, even if he was making an exception did that night.

The issue, it seems, is dudes that go “i just need a vag to fuck and you got one so you wanna go?” And then can figure out why they crash and burn so bad.

63daddy · 2022-08-24T17:16:55+00:00

Society is hypergamous, so yes, one could say men overall have lower standards and women have higher standards. Many men “marry down”.

ruboyuri · 2022-08-24T17:50:08+00:00

Yes, for the sex hot dog on the ground

sadbitch55 · 2022-09-07T16:20:24+00:00

Only if the female is attractive. If this is the case, she can be an absolute criminal.

PMmeareasontolive · 2022-08-24T20:25:15+00:00

Guys have standards. I've seen some ridiculously fussy critiques of women's looks from men on this sub. I've been informed several times here that the average woman is 5'4", 170lbs, as though this were a nightmare for men. If you look at a photographic height/weight site for those numbers, most women carry it very well. Personally I wish my standards were lower, as I don't have enough going on to attract the people I'd like to attract. Sometimes men compromise because their libido gets the best of them or temptation crosses their path. But under normal circumstances, guys have normal standards.

Are women's standards higher? Perhaps, because they can (even if just occasionally), among other reasons.

AngelsMuse · 2022-08-24T16:31:48+00:00

I think because we are generalizing, I do agree with you and I do think the higher value a man is, the higher his standards are. That's been my observation.

Men are so often driven by their libidos, they see any sex as better than no sex in terms of picking a woman, at least for sex/FWB. Men do tend to have some standards for women they will be in a relationship with, but they are still so so low. I kind of cringe when I see men say things like they don't care about her having a job or anything like that. That should be a red flag in my opinion.

No_Reflection_798 · 2022-08-24T18:22:56+00:00

Yes, you are correct in all of those assertions. This has been proven with data, and with mountains of anecdotal evidence.

Another angle to look at it from is this: Women engage with men that they want. Men engage with women that they can. Yes, desperate men will underprice themselves. Picky women will overprice themselves.

This is why men with large body counts are celebrated, but women with large body counts are not. The man is seen as having accomplished something because he has been desired by many women. The woman? Eh, she's just horny a lot.

Pigeon_of_the_sea · 2022-08-24T17:36:08+00:00

Me, thinking of all the times I got rejected...

Kaylxx_sm · 2022-08-24T17:58:51+00:00

I completely agree that men as a whole need to increase their standards. I just had someone in the comments of another post on here say that you don't correct abusive behaviour from women because you gain nothing from it. Like???? Why are you staying in a detrimental environment for the sake of pussy?

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BruddaMSK · 2022-08-24T17:32:19+00:00

Yes very low standards.

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-08-24T17:47:16+00:00

Men with low/no options have low standards

Valuable-Marzipan761 · 2022-08-24T19:02:28+00:00

Lower standards bit clearly men aren't just taking whatever we can get. Having no standards is going to cause a man issues. He'll come across as desperate and very likely end up in a bad relationship if he does get into one.

Salt_Mathematician24 · 2022-08-24T19:18:46+00:00

I think all that is exaggerated a bit. Women tend to date in their own social class or maybe very slightly above just for the security it brings if they chose to have children. Most women end up settling too. Dating is a minefield. Even finding someone you don't want to strangle after spending more than a few hours with is hard enough.

Specialist-Action-33 · 2022-08-24T20:22:29+00:00

When life gives you limitations, you have to take whatever you can get. A lot of men cannot afford to have any standards because of their lack of options. Add the fact that if they choose to have standards, mainstream media doesn't allow them to vocalize them. For example, how many men get shitted on for not wanting fat women or single moms?

InfamousBake1859 · 2022-08-24T20:35:42+00:00

Why would there be sad and lonely girls out there saying pick me then? Both sides has the issues where they are aiming at a group who don’t want them and refuse to settle.

SouthernGrass3 · 2022-08-24T21:49:38+00:00

If the alternative is no sex, then yes, a lot of men have pretty low standards to find a woman appealing enough for intimacy/ to be willing to get into some kind of dating arrangement if that’s what it takes to have sexual access.

This doesn’t say much however, about how a man with minimal standards to get involved will treat a given woman, if he will commit/invest in the relationship beyond whatever is necessary for sexual access, or how he will react if another opportunity arises, etc.

EugeneCezanne · 2022-08-24T23:12:59+00:00

Struggling men have standards regarding looks. Men who do okay have standards regarding personality as well. But standards like "makes X money" or "are at least X tall" are not typical among men, for many historically social and economic reasons.

Nihi1986 · 2022-08-25T03:03:31+00:00

I think so but it's a bit more complicated. They have low standard (some have zero) depending on their situation and depending on their intentions with the girl. If it's just sex, they have low standards, if it's a relationship, they have moderate standards.

BoogersAndSugar · 2022-08-25T03:24:38+00:00

Yep, a plain looking guy has to take what he can afford, not what he wants.

BensonInFL · 2022-08-25T04:13:53+00:00

If anything men only have physical preferences (not requirements), which are very low and is incredibly easy to obtain

If men don't have standards like women have of: height , salary, if the woman has a college degree or not, confidence, sexual performance, if a woman drives or has a car, if a woman has her own house or lives with roommates, confidence, etc.

You're conflating two separate scales/standards

1) The 'degree' of standards men vs women have (i.e. in a sample room of 100 people, how many people would you sleep with)

2) The 'type' of standards men and women have (i.e. physical appearance vs personality (smart, confident, funny, submissiveness) vs social standing and wealth

While these are different for men and women, there is also a third dimension to this, which is that these two sliding scales will shrink and grow depending on the seriousness or intention of the interaction i.e. (one night stand sex, relationship, marriage and kids).

-B

RottingVillain666 · 2022-08-25T07:55:49+00:00

I probably am an outlier. I have a tinder scroll and grindr flame of 2%. Im super picky. But i still get men on my insta DMs or grindr, it's just i don't pay attention to it unless i like them.

Title	Most men have low or zero standards?
Author	CaptainZardok
Upvotes	22
Comments	166
Date	August 24, 2022 4:12 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/wwnk47/most_men_have_low_or_zero_standards/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/most-men-have-low-or-zero-standards.1129530 https://theredarchive.com/post/1129530

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