What do men want

one_ball_policy · 2024-10-01T20:53:59+00:00

I want to learn 2 more languages and put on about 12lbs more muscle without increasing body fat %

Plus-Opportunity8541 · 2024-10-01T19:34:16+00:00

I actually think men are pretty clear about what men want. First, men are much more varied in their preferences. Studies generally back up that men find a wider range of women attractive than women to men, so it's not really like every woman will be attractive to every man. I, for example, really am not attracted to blue eyes. It's something I've never been attracted to. Plenty of other men are attracted to it. So it's fairly difficult to say for looks. There are some things that will generally be attractive. Good hygiene, being in shape, takes good care of themselves. I personally find gym girls attractive, while I know guys that don't. That's just kinda how things are. When it comes to personality, most men just want people who live interesting lives and want to share that with us. If you have a niece, nerdy hobby, I'd way rather hear about that than the last TS album. If you like things that generally aren't mainstream that make you unique, share them. Most men like women who are passionate about something(or at least the ones you'd probably want to date).

In my experience, if you ask a man what he wants looks-wise, he usually has an idea of exactly what he wants. When it comes to personality, again, most men generally know what they want. The problem is that most men generally place priorities on different things and are wildly different in terms of what's attractive to them, so it's really hard to generalize what men actually want.

MikeArrow · 2024-10-01T21:38:57+00:00

Warmth. Both emotionally and physically. It's a cold, hard world out there, and having a partner to share those burdens with and reinforce one another should be most people's main goal.

PM_ME_YOUR_DONGERZ · 2024-10-01T19:32:43+00:00

what do men want?

I want to want someone and be wanted by them

why should women care?

good relationships are objectively better than being alone on both sides

IdiAminD · 2024-10-01T19:42:49+00:00

As a teenager I wanted to be jacked, have lot of money, live in warm place, smoke pot, never get into relationship and bang hot prostitutes, maybe even run my own porn site. That was my ideal. Later I've became normiest normie experimenting with variety of kinks, but in totally monogamous and loving relationship.

I think majority of men want to be normies, have a lot of money, love one woman and have non-boring sex with this person. Rest is irrelevant.

M3taBuster · 2024-10-02T03:10:58+00:00

I want a LTR (and eventually marriage) with a woman who I find reasonably attractive and who shares my values, interests, and lifestyle choices.

Unfortunately, those last 3 things, especially combined, seem to be a pretty tall order, even though they really shouldn't be.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-10-01T20:23:30+00:00

Young people want what they want when they want it. And then if something else is what they want then that becomes what they want

ClevelandSpigot · 2024-10-02T18:01:50+00:00

We actually communicate what we want a lot, and several different ways - through our actions, our body language, and what we say. We also say what we don't like. It's pretty universal, considering we are talking about billions of men. Just watch one video in the Manosphere.

We want:

Peace.
Quiet.
Things to stay the same. This is why we marry you. In order to laminate the relationship closed.
Affection.
Intimacy.

We don't like:

High-maintenance. Yes, this includes makeup and hair.
Drama.
You picking a fight with us because you are bored or hungry.
Lack of proper communication. "Fine."
Judging us against all of the other guys that you have ever dated.

But, women just don't listen to us.

Barely-moral · 2024-10-01T21:20:43+00:00

And why should women care?

If the individual women cares about an individual man she should care. Women in general have no reason to care

So what do men want?

Purpose. A reason to deal with life, to do more than just surviving.

What do they want in women. Someone worth the effort required to attract/keep.

Most of the time not even that.

Sex. Sandwich. Silence.

Translated to womanese: Someone sexually attracted to me that provides affection in a way I can feel it and is more peaceful than stressful.

Warm_Gur8832 · 2024-10-02T00:54:11+00:00

To not have to worry about mattering.

FunkGetsStrongerPt1 · 2024-10-01T22:13:25+00:00

I’m just speaking for myself…

A loyal, virtuous woman who shares my values and is a good communicator.

Looks don’t really matter at all, being 10kg overweight is fine, being 40kg overweight isn’t.

Puzzleheaded_Card_71 · 2024-10-02T02:48:49+00:00

Men know what they want. The issue is they are bullied and vilified if they say it. A layer deeper is we find a variety of women attractive, and can find any passion she has for a legitimate hobby or cause to be an attractive thing as well. What all men want and need, though, is to be respected.

Unable_Evidence_4028 · 2024-10-01T21:41:57+00:00

The reason why there is conflict as to what men want is simple. Men are individuals. They are not one single blob and there is nothing pushing us to agree into anything. It is almost impossible to make us agree into anything. So yeah outside of basics like:

Not a risk/danger to him or his property or his loved ones
Not too much of a cost to him or his property or his loved ones.
Be sexually satisfiable.

There is no agreement.

And why should women care?

The same reason as any, If you do not supply what is demanded of you, you will not be supplied what you demand.

Involved_Currently · 2024-10-01T19:34:00+00:00

Equality

For boys and men to be protected from danger.

OR

If its impossible to separate masculinity from duty, that this at least is appreciated as sacrafice and seen as inherently heroic. And not just taken for granted. Men need to be able to opt out without being shamed.

Women dont care and men shouldnt make them care, but men should care and make other men care. Only that way can it be taken seriously in aggregate.

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BigMadLad · 2024-10-02T01:03:40+00:00

I think, as you can see the thread, a lot of men have a lot of different answers, because men have less choice and therefore have to take whatever comes our way. I do think there’s a difference between what boys want, which is the stereotypical answer of sex and food, versus men want, which is often more of a real relationship.

Across both categories, I think any male wants someone who makes them feel special. For some that is catering to their needs, for others it’s thinking about them and doing nice things, for others is hanging out with them, whatever the root of it is, making men feel special. Men have a unique problem where often times we are expendable, not unique, and just a number. Each guy addresses that differently, but the end of the day the hope is he matters to somebody.

The inverse of this is any behavior that makes them feel like one of many or replaceable, hence why a lot of men care about body count, stories about exes, if you have children, etc., because those are proxies for how special they are. Same thing if they feel like they are being used for money as many men feel money is something any men could have, versus individual personality traits.

As to why should women care? I think it addresses the main difference in dating, which is women fear being not committed to versus men fear not getting anything at all. If you know the man you like he is far more likely to commit to you if you make him feel special in the way he wants to feel special. If you treat him Like he is replaceable, or show him that you are replaceable, it’ll just end up worse for you.

Lost_Undegrad · 2024-10-02T01:47:39+00:00

I want to be wanted.

Savings-Bee-4993 · 2024-10-02T03:16:20+00:00

I want to find and live out a meaningful life.

If we’re talking about dating and LTRs, marry a woman that I’m attracted to, is considerate, wants me, is committed to improving herself, voluntarily decides to commit to me for life, and starting a family with her.

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2024-10-02T03:31:16+00:00

[permanently deleted]

RoblesTyler1988 · 2024-10-02T19:17:17+00:00

To feel respected and appreciated That literally is all

kingofgama · 2024-10-04T15:20:33+00:00

Dumb question, men aren't a monolith.

empireofadhd · 2024-10-05T15:32:27+00:00

I think people have different goals and they vary through life.

In general though there are some patterns. Both genders want people who are supportive in whatever they want.

What aive noticed about women is that they primarily want men to be nice and convenient. Which means they won’t support men and boys in education and in their careers. It’s considered feeding the patriarchy. This all changes when men become girlfriends and husbands. Suddenly the pressure to be high achieving and high earner goes through the roof.

This is what’s causing a lot of frustration and anger in a lot of men when they interact online and offline.

A great example is dating advice I got from a friend: I asked her what o should do to be more attractive to women. Her advice was to be nice. I asked if I should earn more money or work out more. She said no because only bad men does those things and she did want me to be a rapist patriarch. Later on I asked her about this advice and it turned out it would be inconvenient for her if I was no longer a doormat and a nice guy, she would feel threatened by me.

Anyways. I think a lot of women give advice based on what is convenient to themselves, rather then what actually will help the guy reach their goals.

Imaginary_Sleep_6329 · 2024-10-01T20:41:26+00:00

Hot, not a cunt, puts out, doesn't cheat and doesn't cost too much.

It's not complicated. At all.

BCRE8TVE · 2024-10-02T06:47:39+00:00

Fit, feminine, friendly, stomach full, balls empty, peace at home, and loyalty, will cover 90% of just about every man's needs.

There are lots of details into what exactly feminine means, and variety between what the different men want, but generally men don't want masculine women with confrontational energy, because if men were attracted to masculine confrontational energy, men would be gay, not straight.

Why do you think men don't know what they want?

Men generally grade women on a 1 to 10 scale, and goes from someone to have fun with, someone to be in a relationship with, and at the top there's wifey material. It's not super complicated, women just have to improve their score by removing negative attributes and adding positive attributes until they hit wifey material.

Men have been fairly clear and consistent in what they want for decades now. The problem isn't that men don't know what they want, it's that generally women aren't listening.

And why should women care?

I mean, if women don't want a happy relationship...

RycerzKwarcowy · 2024-10-02T07:28:22+00:00

So what do men want?

Consistency. We're good at playing by the rules. We're good at sometimes breaking them to gain advantage too. Both are impossible when there are no rules or when they are messed up on purpose.

And why should women care?

You got what your grandmas wanted, now you make the rules instead of long established traditions you rejected as "created by men for men". It's like not caring about the car while sitting on driver's seat.

obviousredflag · 2024-10-02T09:51:14+00:00

There is no thing that all men want. So the question can't be answered for all men.

You can ask: what do men want on average, or what do most men want, etc. You can specify regardin what aspect of life: what do men want in love/relationships/family, work/career, personal growth/self actualization, leasure time/hobbies, friendships etc.

Why should women care? Because helping men get what they want is a mating advantage for women. If a woman wants to get the highest mate value man possible, she better cares what this man wants and helps to provide it/him get it.

pfmarshallx · 2024-10-03T00:00:28+00:00

We really want the F’s from any potential woman of ours.

And I don’t mean bra cup size (even for us that are into bustier women).

Fit, Feminine, Friendly, Fresh, Fertile, Faithful

(Edit: and notice how we didn’t say ScarJo, Sydney Sweeney, or Mary Poppins or any other fantastical or rare one)

Not one of these are unreasonable or solely due to genetic lottery (unlike men who are judged by our innate appearance, height and penis size)

(And by Fresh I mean, at least youthful in spirit if not younger and not jaded and used up by life or her bad decisions)

All of which are pure lifestyle choice from the opposite sex unlike men who have to build and earn our way up to value

(It is EVOLUTIONARY PSYCHOLOGY based on Evolutionary biology and biological reality, so better accept it or continue to confuse society with utopian ideological fantasies that liberalism destroyed our society with)

And for the sex that is born and naturally get their gender privlege (their youth and beauty) it was their wrong and terrible attitudes and decisions that causes them to lose these. So we men have every right to have a high standard against them and that

And no it is no longer unreasonable. When even the most below average woman can believe what Lizzo does and think they deserve nothing less than Ryan Gosling (who’s also a millionaire if not a billionaire), not only can should we be able to screen and shame just as badly. Y’all benefited as a whole gender to pant us, shame us and demand from us as a whole. Why shouldn’t we? We even have the moral high ground as our standards are actually down to earth.

But any blindness to this would show how the acceptance of societal Female privlege is definitely showing, OP.

Edit to add:

And you should care because while women control sex and reproduction, men control relationships and marriage.

A discouraged, demoralized and disenfranchised male population will NOT work to maintain the systems and protections that your side takes for granted for much longer.

Neither will we create or support the fostering of a strong next generation through LEGITIMATE families and children that can at the very least become contributing members of society that’ll be able to fund the society when y’all are too old and tired to work.

Even then it isn’t us men who are increasingly literally passing away more and more from literal “broken heart syndrome” out of lack of an intimate partner

All the haughty wine aunts having this happen to them is just the beginning. The trickle to stream flow of lonely “career” and “boss babes” and “hot girl summer” veterans proclaiming exasperated misery on Tik Tok, Instagram and YouTube shorts are only just the beginning.

The question you should be asking is that why should men care enough about y’all, enough to be doing things in society for the opposite sex. Y’all never cared about us. We men have always fought hard to survive and rebuild after falls of societies (think of how many Chinese dynasties there were over thousands of years up to now). We men have, especially recently, have always been forced to deal with being alone more with no help. Y’all haven’t

Oh and P.S. remember The powder keg that led to the mass crimes against humanity in Rwanda in the decades before 2000 WAS a mass large amount of disproportionally disenfranchised and men with literally nothing to lose. Think about. It isn’t blackmail it’s warning of what is likely to come if views like yours continue (as in why should “we” (women) care)

rustlerhuskyjeans · 2024-10-01T19:46:25+00:00

A woman that other men want, someone who adores them, a fun personality, preferably no kids, and a job. This woman is very difficult to obtain, that’s why if you have a beautiful faithful woman as a guy your status and appeal is instantly raised, and other women start wanting you.

What men are tired of is women constantly trying at the guys that already has way too many options or already taken. Which guys can’t successfully accomplish unless they are that top guy. This leaves a lot of guys waiting for women like trickle down economics from desirable men who cast them aside.

LowCreddit · 2024-10-01T20:39:31+00:00

Men want hot women who have great personalities. Women should care if they want actual relationships with good men and not just strung along over and over.

The better the man, the more personality matters. Women wildly overestimate how much emphasis men with actual options place on looks. Can a woman find a man if she is just some fucking deadbeat loser? Of course. That doesn't mean she won't pay a price. She will only keep men who would keep such a woman.

The other problem is that women project what they want in a man onto men and then become the perfect woman, for another woman. They chase careers and status as if men gave a fuck at all. They don't. They do care about socioeconomic background, but that is impossible to change.

So what makes a great womanly personality? Here's a short list:

Don't be mentally ill. This is number fucking one. Not being on pills puts you ahead of half of women. Actually having some mental stability puts you in the top 10%.
Learn how to communicate and resolve conflicts. For the few women who are capable of this, the world is their oyster. Most women never learn this because they don't have to.
Learn what men want in general and learn what your man wants specifically. Women used to have this down to an art. Very few women know or care what their partners want anymore.
Put in effort. Effort is not chores. Effort is not complaints. Effort is doing something of your own initiative to make your relationship better. This goes a long, long, long way towards maintaining a happy, healthy relationship.

SadCahita · 2024-10-01T22:50:08+00:00

I want a low bodycount bangmaid who bears my children. It's not rocket science.

DietTyrone · 2024-10-01T21:27:54+00:00

Peace of mind, love, balls empty, belly full. That's the gist of it. Not a very long or complicated list.

odd_cloud · 2024-10-02T00:28:11+00:00

Generally, to find a good partner. While seeking, it would be nice to experience different sexual and romantic experiences.

What do men want in a woman?

sexually attractive: healthy weight and idk normal appearance and above (it’s difficult to specify, but I’d say 70-80% of women pass)
sex drive
personality: hard to specify, sometimes you just click
tolerable mental health: no all-consuming problems
supportive, able to talk through disagreements

Consistent-Career888 · 2024-10-02T06:34:00+00:00

Men want a woman that respects them and is able to make him and the relationship her priority . Just as he makes her and the relationship the priority.

Having empathy and compassion. Which are critical to a healthy relationship.

Being attractive to him . Men find a much wider range of women attractive. This is for genitic diversity and a better opportunity to pass on genes snd procreate

Which is the prime reason human exist . To have sex and propagate the human species.

We want a girlfriend oe wife to stay as attractive as she can . Of course men should do the same.

A woman who is pleasant to be with , shares a few common interests .

We want s women that doesn’t make out lives hell A woman who sets firm boundaries with friends and family.

I noticed most paisas are pleasantly surprised when a Anglo boyfriend sets boundaries on friends and families.

It can be more difficult in Hispanic/ Latin families .

We want healthy exclusive sexual and emotional intimacy .

Low drama and chaos . Life is not z telenovela . Normal people don’t have weekly crises and drama . It’s not healthy physically , emotionally or psychologically .

We want quality time together without your annoying , drama and chaos seeking , creating friends .

I find having a phone and digital device free time very rewarding . If

It gives you the opportunity to really spend time together without interruptions and people interfering with our relationship.

Having dealt with that . I set strict boundaries on phone calls after 8pm .

I mute phones and have a tranquil relaxing and more intimate time together .

When you are talking on the phone and texting. You are not psychologically or emotionally with your partner.

Be able to have a meaningful conversation , share your life with us .

There should be things that only you and your partner share .

I don’t want your drama and chaos creating “ friends “ to know every detail of our relationship.

If you can have empathy , compassion be kind , which is not the same as nice . Set healthy boundaries especially with people outside the relationship. You will find your relationship is much better .

It really isn’t difficult if you are a decent, kind , compassionate, psychologically and emotionally healthy person.

Treat your partner as you want yo be treated.

Use the reasonable person test . If a responsible person would find a action or behavior questionable do not do it .

If you have to hide something from your partner. Its not something you should be doing . You know it will hurt your partner.

A kind compassionate , empathetic , fun , intelligent. Pleasant to be with. Emotionally and sexually faithful Women they find attractive is what men look for

OscarTheHusky · 2024-10-02T14:59:40+00:00

First of all women do not know what they want, because what they want is based on other women's opinions, it's called mate choice copying or copy-mechanism/strategy and it's basically wanting the same thing as their friends or people they value thinking it's the best for them as well (which often is not). So yes we will never know what women want, and if you want to know what an average women want just look at what what her friends or social groups are doing, it's that easy truly and it often reflects 98% of their personality.

On the other hand men know what they want and it's less complex, let me tell you.

Men want to be loved and wanted by their partner, period. Men are also more varied in what they find attractive compared to women, personality traits are much more important to men whereas women are more attracted to appearances (this is factual and well documented by psychologists). Men are attracted to good hygiene, women that are in shape and who can take good care of themselves and have a good personality, this is a general consensus among 95% of men but then there are actual variations in personalities, for example I am a nerd, so obviously I will love a women who is as nerdy as me and interesting to talk to, and I'd rather her talking to me about that niche thing she loves than the last Taylor Swift album or dark romance book she read because all the girls like that it's a monolith it's a hivemind it's not interesting they most of them all love the same thing, women should understand than the more unique and special and less mainstream they are the more interesting she will appear to men.

redandswollen · 2024-10-01T21:46:33+00:00

Someone (relatively) hot who is kind to us and doesn't take our money or kids.

What do men want

Comments

equality

noun

Title	What do men want
Author	alwaysright12
Upvotes	2
Comments	192
Date	October 1, 2024 5:31 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1fttvt5/what_do_men_want/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-do-men-want.1531746 https://theredarchive.com/post/1531746