Would you rather be viewed as “financially stable” or attractive?

Mobrowncheeks · 2022-03-01T19:09:38+00:00

Lol who is actually allowing people to judge their finances anyway. My finances are mine, id rather been seen as attractive.

simeneta_two · 2022-03-01T18:59:43+00:00

I think anyone who says they’d rather be viewed as “stable” than viewed as “attractive” is kidding themselves. Being desirable is always the better deal for any gender. And this extends outside relationships too—there’s plenty of research showing the halo effect can lead to better opportunities at work and life in general.

(And yes I realize it’s possible to be both stable and attractive)

Bandit174 · 2022-03-01T19:36:33+00:00

Attractive is more fun and gets you way more play and leverage with women.

Also you can use attractiveness to get wealth far more easily than you can use wealth to become attractive.

BittererWegwerf · 2022-03-01T19:07:04+00:00

You can always become financially stable, your attractiveness level however is heavily determined by factors you cannot control, apart from your fitness level. Therefore i'd rather be attractive.

backcourtjester · 2022-03-01T19:10:29+00:00

Im seen as both, if I was forced to lose one it would be financial stability. Ive been broke, I can handle broke. I’ve never been unattractive

throwaway316stunner · 2022-03-01T19:17:11+00:00

Attractive.

Hell, you could argue I’m financially stable right now. Granted, I can’t buy a house at the moment, because everything in the Northeast is way too goddamn expensive. But I have no student or car loans, I’ve maxed my Roth IRA for the last 4 years, and I’ve also “invested” in several rookie refractor cards (both current and upcoming).

midwesternMD · 2022-03-01T19:30:49+00:00

Attractive any day of the week.

I’d rather be desired for who I am/the body I have today than my assets. Assets aren’t particularly unique to my person. Anyone can develop some if they live within their means and save/invest. So over time, everyone will be able to have more in the way of assets. But raw carnal attractiveness? You either have it or you don’t.

wtknight · 2022-03-01T18:58:03+00:00

Attractive. Financially stable alone isn’t going to get much sexual passion from a woman.

Barely-moral · 2022-03-01T20:02:04+00:00

The queston is about how would you rather be viewed as. Not about being poor vs being hot.

I rather be viewed as physically attractive. No doubt about it.

mrcs84usn · 2022-03-01T20:32:30+00:00

I want to BE stable.

I want to be VIEWED as attractive.

NockerJoe · 2022-03-01T21:02:13+00:00

I've been fat with a decent paycheck and car and picking up the tab. I've been broke with muscles and long hair and a drug habit. Anyone who says stable has never felt the difference in how women actually treat the hot guy.

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-03-02T00:12:15+00:00

From a relationship standpoint definitely attractive, I will repeat ad nauseam sex and sexual attraction / intimacy is what separates a relationship from just a really good friendship, and there's a difference between how a woman fucks you when she kind of likes you and when she genuinely lusts for you, I'll take the lust for 10,000 Alex (R.I.P Mr. Trebek)

RahLyt · 2022-03-01T19:04:37+00:00

Attractive

Siukslinis_acc · 2022-03-01T19:17:23+00:00

Because looks fade with age. So you should have something non-looks based that could keep your partner at your side in the long run.

Also "stable" does not only mean "financial stability". It also incorporates mental stability, a bit of predictability and other aspects that don't change randomly.

sarkington · 2022-03-01T19:27:30+00:00

Attractive

Financially stable isn’t hard

afkawayrn · 2022-03-01T19:34:30+00:00

Both. These questions are so weird on here. Why would someone strive for just one

januaryphilosopher · 2022-03-01T19:20:00+00:00

Attractive, but if my financial stability is part of that I must say I don't really care. I imagine that being unstable would make me rather unattractive. I aim to be stable more than just financially to be able to sustain a relationship though.

GuitarsBack · 2022-03-01T19:31:10+00:00

Attractive.

I want her to appreciate other things I bring to the table, of course. Not take them for granted. But they shouldn't be the main reason she chose me.

HeartCatchHana · 2022-03-01T20:13:57+00:00

Attractive

DreamsOfWishes · 2022-03-01T20:17:43+00:00

I rather BE financially stable then viewed as attractive.

And that should have been how you posed that question, because OFFCOURSE being viewed as attractive is better then being viewed as financially stable.

But you are trying to proof that it's shitty to be considered stable. That this is a bad thing.

Stable is a neutral asset that can get considered a minimum with age, but nobody is picking you just because you are stable. A fuckton of men are stable. If you have loose standards for stable, I would say 80% of the population is stable. If you have normal fucking standards, I would say 60%.

You are not getting chosen for being stable, you are getting excluded if you are not. They're still choosing you for values that you may find acceptable compared to attractive and attractiveness itself isn't being excluded either.

Nobody's panties are getting wet from stability. It's not an active asset. It's passive. Doesn't do anything good or bad. It's just that without stableness, you aren't getting shit even if you are attractive enough (for the women that start vetting for stability), because they are making the choice not to do anything with you.

Head-Language-2977 · 2022-03-01T22:51:28+00:00

Attractiveness allows you to choose whoever you want as a partner. No matter who stable you are, being average looking will severely limit your options for an LTR. Most people claim that relationships are more important than money, right? So I’d rather have what would improve my relationship options, not my vacation options.

Zcuzz · 2022-03-02T00:32:02+00:00

I am seen as attractive and it gets me laid once in a while, but not being financially stable makes me unsuitable for most relationships.

anonymousUser1SHIFT · 2022-03-02T02:28:26+00:00

Attractive. Only gold diggers will find you attractive if you are viewed as financial stable.

BoogersAndSugar · 2022-03-02T12:27:11+00:00

Attractive. Bar none, by far, point blank and period! If I wanted a prostitute, I'd rent one, not marry one.

Arnold_Incelinator · 2022-03-02T21:06:18+00:00

attractive. I dont want to be the betabux I want to be the chad who fucks other people's wives.

cowfishAreReal · 2022-03-01T18:58:12+00:00

I don't care if people view me as financially stable or not, but BEING financially stable, that's way more valuable than being attractive

IHaveSalesQuestions · 2022-03-01T18:59:41+00:00

As someone who was broke and still got women, I’d say attractive. But I’d really like to say both.

DrinkItInMan11 · 2022-03-01T21:15:51+00:00

Attractive, being attractive gets me laid more often, being financially stable is fantastic don't get me wrong, but I'd rather be attractive.

TheRealMekkor · 2022-03-01T22:09:56+00:00

I'm average in looks, but my financial stability extends beyond the youth of my skin.

pearllovespink · 2022-03-01T23:35:22+00:00

As a woman, this is a hard one. Being attractive and desired is appealing but it doesn’t mean everything to me. Beauty fades over time. On the other hand, being attractive can lead to financial stability. I can go broke tomorrow and call a guy up that will help me out. I’m going to go with attractive.

FatefulMender89 · 2022-03-02T00:52:17+00:00

At this point in my life neither

Mental_Ebb_3795 · 2022-03-02T01:47:47+00:00

Attractive

Financial_Leave4411 · 2022-03-02T02:03:36+00:00

I’d rather be seen as financially stable. I have people in my life because I enjoy their company not because I need them to be.

kaizenkin · 2022-03-02T02:14:59+00:00

Attractive

2022-03-02T02:37:09+00:00

I don't care how ya view me, financial stability is a must. Also I've been poor, and it makes you ugly. Can't afford good clothes, haircuts, healthy food, the stress is insane

GobblingRenegade · 2022-03-02T02:47:52+00:00

Financially stable is attractive!

omegajelly200 · 2022-03-02T12:55:18+00:00

I wanna be the guy that the woman stays with at the worst of times, not the best of times. Hence, attractive.

Women who marry men for money will leave the man if he loses money.

spunkystoic · 2022-03-03T13:08:39+00:00

Cor...this is a tough one tbh.

As a very short dude, there's no doubt being "conventionally attractive" would be of tremendous benefit to me.

On the other hand being financially stable has allowed me so much security with health, travelling, future opportunities, etc. However, it almost goes without saying, in the western world currently, financial security contributes almost ZERO to romantic success (unless one is willing to travel abroad, etc.).

And I'm not having any of that "transactional" bullshit...we all know every relationship is transactional to a degree and that currency can be looks, money, status, etc.

BUT, all considered, I THINK I would choose being attractive as I think currently in the western world - and ESPECIALLY in the UK which is even more looks obsessed than the US imo - looks can lead to both romantic and financial success.

For example, the amount of high-end corporate jobs that are basically 100% jocks and jockettes are insane. Don't get me wrong I'm still doing very well for myself but that's by using my marketing skills/connections/family/hustling/saving than anything else. I'm under no pretense that I would be in a more "glamorous" job if I looked a certain way.

P.S. Obviously as tech such as VR and robotics comes around and shifts the market, my answer may change.

Mrs_Drgree · 2022-03-01T18:58:54+00:00

Financially stable. Lol. My looks are gonna fade anyway, so I would want someone to value me beyond that.

tempaccc2022 · 2022-03-01T18:58:38+00:00

attractive

bluestjuice · 2022-03-01T19:23:45+00:00

This is such a weird false dichotomy.

Of course I want to be both, but it’s ludicrous to imagine that I will be attractive in the sense of gorgeous, fit, and young forever. I really want my partners to be attracted to me, is all.

I also want to be financially stable but that has to do with securing my long-term well-being and that of my family.

Specialist-Action-33 · 2022-03-01T22:07:30+00:00

As a male, one thing I noticed is that you will receive compliments from most women about being financially stable than being attractive (whether or not they both apply to you).

alec5280 · 2022-03-02T01:31:25+00:00

When it comes to getting laid, physical attraction is king.

But when it comes to relationships, being physically attractive is much more important for a woman than a man, in my experience.

Intrepid_Place5390 · 2022-03-01T20:23:00+00:00

hmm, how about, figure out if your partner finds you (attractive), before, they find out your financial situation.

When first dating, I expect her to pay her share. when we get into a relationship, same. If I'm looking for a partner, it's 50/50.

masochisticanalwhore · 2022-03-01T21:20:57+00:00

I see someone as financially stable as someone who can take care of themselves and has their shit together, at least somewhat. I don't see them as a safety net, because I'm not entitled to their money. If they didn't have their finances together, I'd be afraid of them potentially trying to take advantage of me

Basically, I want a relationship between 2 responsible adults.

Is this worth more than being attractive? That depends on the person I guess?

ohheyhi99 · 2022-03-01T21:29:19+00:00

Attractive, then work on becoming financially stable

_-One4All-_ · 2022-03-02T01:28:30+00:00

For a man, the two things are intertwined. Personally, I’d rather be financially stable because my finances determine every aspect of my life while perceived physical attraction comes and goes very quickly and does not pay my lifestyle. With that being said, hit the gym bros.

AdobiWanKenobi · 2022-03-02T01:47:43+00:00

Attractive, being financially stable is something achievable

amyg36819 · 2022-03-02T01:53:12+00:00

attractive cause my pretty privilege will allow people to forget my spending problem 🥲

Smitten_Squire · 2022-03-02T02:16:15+00:00

Attractive people make more money, so both

ChromaticVengeance · 2022-03-02T05:47:36+00:00

Why not both? I can’t find someone attractive unless they are financially stable

ChadThundagaCock · 2022-03-02T06:06:44+00:00

Attractive, but preferably both if plausible

Wander1900 · 2022-03-02T07:14:14+00:00

F stable

Aran82 · 2022-03-02T07:20:01+00:00

Financially stable guys pay alimony and child support when wifey leaves them for a more attractive / exciting man.

Pilling_it · 2022-03-02T07:33:18+00:00

I'd rather be seen as attractive while also being actually financially stable.

sunkized · 2022-03-02T09:07:02+00:00

Attractive

ManGoneNoWay · 2022-03-02T12:36:08+00:00

Attractive. I’d rather date a blind woman than one dumb enough to think I’m “stable”.

womandatory · 2022-03-02T13:57:14+00:00

I’d rather find someone attracted to me, who I’m attracted to and vet them for being financially savvy or a risky wastrel.

I’ve dated guys who are amazing risk takers - start businesses, have great vision and ideas, but they’re rocky and emotionally unstable as hell, because their entire self image is wrapped up in their success. They win big on a chance and it’s all smiles and celebrations until the market turns, or the next risk flunks out and costs them everything, and more and they turn into angry, abusive assholes or sullen, withdrawn children.

I’d rather meet someone for whom attraction is mutual and then flesh out the realities of what they consider to be financial stability or ‘provider’ mode in both of us. As a single parent with a deadshit ex, it’s my job to provide for my kids, not my current partner’s job.

I’m self-made. I have my own home (and a spare) and a late model SUV, all hard worked for. I’m a professional with degrees in multiple disciplines and a six-figure income. I was all of that before I married and had kids and divorced and had to rebuild, and I’m still all that now.

Attraction is necessary for anything to even start and it’s necessary to move beyond just sex. What takes a relationship into trusted, forever, exclusive zone is whether it not the guy is a flake. I literally don’t care that you made $11K in one week trading. I don’t care that you’re qualified for a day job that earns you $250K a year. I care about what you DO because what you say doesn’t mean shit.

If you’re going to risk my house because you traded short because your testicles tingled on WSB and you fucked up big time, you can go fuck yourself. Enjoy living in that tent. If you watched the market and invested wisely and learned a hobby or skill that earned you a side income and channeled that into something else to grow something we can build together, well now you have my attention.

For women, attraction isn’t just about your physical characteristics. You can be objectively handsome and dumb as a rock and you might get laid once, but probably not twice, because dumb pretty men are shit in bed, undateable and utterly unmarriagable. Moderately attractive men with their shit together, a plan for the future that includes a woman are infinitely more attractive.

Women just need to learn the difference between a man who talks big and one who just shows up and gets the job done, and not get too distracted by pretty dumb dude on the way.

AngryGuineaPig_ · 2022-03-02T20:50:20+00:00

I can’t speak for anyone else, but for me it’s often the case that financial stability = attractiveness. For example, when given a choice between a very physically attractive man whose finances make it slightly challenging for him to sustain his own lifestyle vs a man who is less physically attractive but has complete financial stability, the more financially stable candidate will become more desirable/attractive to me. I suppose it depends on the person and their values/wants/needs, but sometimes being financially stable is part of what makes a person attractive.

stonetortise · 2022-03-03T02:14:13+00:00

Attractive. I'll never marry a second time but I don't necessarily want to sleep alone.

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Ok_Razzmatazz_1751 · 2022-03-01T21:24:06+00:00

You can actually have both of these attributes as an adult .

heyitsjeapeagain · 2022-03-01T22:44:23+00:00

As long as they aren’t using me as a means to an end, it doesn’t matter to me why someone likes me. No one has liked me so far.

Title	Would you rather be viewed as “financially stable” or attractive?
Author	cmchunk
Upvotes	24
Comments	124
Date	March 1, 2022 6:56 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/t4fbm9/would_you_rather_be_viewed_as_financially_stable/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/would-you-rather-be-viewed-as-financially-stable.1104637 https://theredarchive.com/post/1104637

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