Men below 30, would you date a woman who used to be a sugarbaby? Maybe she used a sugar dady thrice her age to cover law school fees or something

Love-Is-Selfish · 2024-06-29T15:32:26+00:00

It would be a huge red flag. It’s nothing to do with being intimidated. You don’t sell sex or being a lover just like you don’t sell friendship.

tHiShiTiStooPID · 2024-06-29T15:27:02+00:00

Thing is, for someone to do sex work they must learn to disconnect sex from intimacy and disconnect sex from attraction. They have to be able to do this as a prerequisite. So they have to learn to appear turned on and interested in someone they are not. They have to be able to have sex with someone they are not attracted to, maybe even repulsed by. If they do this long enough you won’t ever be able to know if her having sex with you is genuinely driven by the desire you assume it is. It could all be “intimate theater”, because she learned to put on a show as part of the profession. The other consequence is that it creates a transactional mentality about relationships. An expectation that they should be “paid” for just participating and that the value of your relationship will come down to what you do for her and what you give her….basically what you pay for. So while you might think you are being a good man by providing for her, paying the rent, taking her on vacations, she will see it as the bare minimum for her to even participate, and not anything worthy of praise. Certainly not a signal of how much you love her or are serious about being with her. This is the consequence of sex work for a woman and it can make future relationship, that are not based on commerce, challenging. Not impossible, but it requires that she be able to change her perception of men and relationships, because when you do sex work you are exposed to one very specific type of man and that will make you jaded. You’ll believe all men are functionally lying, cheating degenerates, or so pathetically addicted to sex but unable to get it without paying. Put all of it together and you get the “men are useless without money” mentality that is definitely not conducive to happiness for either person. If you have a relationship with a former sex worker, these will be your challenges. If she is worth the work to you, then good, just go in eyes open.

Ultramega39 · 2024-06-29T15:20:45+00:00

No, there's something about sugar baby/sugar daddy relationships that make me uncomfortable. Probably because it's very transactional.

krackedy · 2024-06-29T14:47:29+00:00

No. Nothing personally against sex workers but I'm not interested in someone who was in that field.

Maractop · 2024-06-29T15:31:26+00:00

purplish_possum · 2024-06-29T16:41:45+00:00

Prostitution is an automatic life-long disqualification.

nnuunn · 2024-06-29T14:54:59+00:00

No, I would not date a woman like that

Cunning_Linguists_ · 2024-06-29T14:46:07+00:00

Why would I do that when I could date a normal woman?

Exciting-Parfait-776 · 2024-06-29T16:03:34+00:00

That’s a hard no for me

Live_Guidance7199 · 2024-06-29T15:21:22+00:00

You can just say "prostitute" and save yourself all the typing.

MotleyCrew1989 · 2024-06-29T19:04:21+00:00

So, a former prostitute??

Hell no. No man should fall that low as to date a former prostitute.

EricExplainsOfficial · 2024-06-29T15:34:45+00:00

This wouldn’t disqualify a woman for going on dates, but would disqualify her for exclusivity or relationship.

Pinning down “how much” or “for what reason” a girl desires a guy is incredibly difficult. Reasons and intensity are constantly changing. Just look at all the reasons women LOOSE their desire for a man with those “ick” videos.

untamed-italian · 2024-06-29T16:46:20+00:00

Men below 30, would you date a woman who used to be a sugarbaby?

I mean I have. Not by selecting for it though. It was alright I guess, in the grand scheme of things. I've survived worse.

Maybe she used a sugar dady thrice her age to cover law school fees or something

Idk at some point I just start feeling sorry for em, and that doesn't feel like a great way to start a relationship.

And you are her 1st "age appropriate " relationship.

Wait what?? This lady went through middle school, high school, college, AND law school while only fucking some 60 yo retiree?

... I mean on the one hand no I really do not like the vibe of this. This woman is pushing 30 and the only sexual relationships she has had were explicitly transactional trades of sex for money.

I say this as a former sex worker: the ones who never even try to have a normal relationship are the ones who are the greatest risk to anyone interested in a normal relationship.

But on the other hand... when I was under 30 I was just as curious as I am now but a lot more impulsive. So I'd probably go for it, though I shouldn't.

And you are 100% sure she doesnt want you 4 $$$

Pffft... lol. No, I would not be sure of that at all. That is the specific problem with the whole thing!

And I get why some young guys would feel intimidated that their girls ex was much older, richer, experienced..

I'm not intimidated by a guy over twice my age. Idk why I would be.

But look at the bright side, she prolly desires you more than she ever did her ex.

That's a hilariously revealing thing to call a "bright side".

Dont even know if a sugar arrangement can be even called a relationship.

It can't really, because it is a polite term for what is essentially soft core prostitution. That's the whole problem - this is a woman who has no real relationship experience and has spent what sounds like most of a decade interacting with sex on exclusively and explicitly transactional terms.

Why would any self respecting man believe this woman will treat him any differently? Or even if she does make a point to treat him like he isn't a sugar daddy, that's still interacting with the relationship to prove he is different from her ex and not just to bond and share intimacy.

Hell, for a person like this (man or woman) who literally has only been with people who paid them for it I would honestly doubt whether they are capable of being truly intimate with anyone. If they are, it is a capacity they would have to build over the long term. Emotionally it is like dating a virgin who doesn't know the first thing about treating you like you are your own person.

I get that she is just looking for love from her PoV, but that's what most people are doing too. And the way she has lived her life so far really strongly suggests men will not find love with her, only more bills.

AMDisappointment · 2024-06-30T02:11:40+00:00

Nope she's literally a prostitute

giveuporfindaway · 2024-06-30T02:16:24+00:00

This is a would you date a high priced escort thread. On some level I actually respect sugarbaby's or escorts more than civilian women with a high n-count. The older men they gave their time to were more civilized than ghetto thugs or asshole fuckboys. But the problem with these types of women is they always on some level view their body as transactional. They'll probably withhold sex at some point. It also certainly doesn't make me want to marry them. They may be suitable for a low investment relationship.

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Jazzlike_Worth_9908 · 2024-06-29T15:41:21+00:00

Id be highly bothered by the information but id primarly judge my relationship for how it goes

grumud · 2024-06-29T18:09:56+00:00

Did once. Mistake. No, I won't ever again.

Ayaka_Simp_ · 2024-06-29T21:09:28+00:00

As someone who has dated multiple sex workers ... don't do it.

WhaleBiologistCILISI · 2024-06-29T23:38:29+00:00

Date? No chance. Inquire about whether she still in need of some sugar, not entirely out of the question.

WouldThisMakeMoney · 2024-06-29T16:24:30+00:00

If she actually had sex for money then I wouldn't be interested but why would that be the case?

If you're just 7-8/10, which would by my standards would be the minimum I would date, looks wise, (if she had a great personality) you can easily cover the cost of college just sending pictures to desperate old men or starting an OF, neither of which I would have an issue with at all.

On the flip side, even if she is a 10/10 and a perfect match for me I'm not dating her if she literally prostituted herself out. The fuck?

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PMmeareasontolive · 2024-06-29T17:16:45+00:00

I sort of have. I wouldn't describe it as "sugar baby" but I dated someone who had dated a very rich guy who freely spent his money, took her on an extended tour of another continent, lavish dinners, fine hotels, etc. And it was obvs just for the dough. His first words to her were "I luffff you" whispered hoarsely in her ear. Confidence that comes from having bankrolls to back it up.

It didn't last long with us, I was way too boring (and cheap) and she was well aware that she had tons of opportunities out there well beyond me.

nofaplove-it · 2024-06-30T16:00:07+00:00

Probably not, especially because these types of women love to circlejerk that they want a tradman while they aren’t anything a tradman wants

just_a_place · 2024-07-01T06:47:06+00:00

Hard No.

CloudsTasteGeometric · 2024-07-02T17:27:34+00:00

Absolutely not.

boom-wham-slam · 2024-07-03T20:11:22+00:00

I'm older than 30 but nah... not into 304s.

I'd casually date them but not seriously or commit anything I couldn't get out of at any second for any reason.

LimpJongUn · 2024-06-29T19:09:48+00:00

Never. I have had several sugar babbles in the past. Sugar babby is another way to say prostitute. They all have some issues. You pay them to go away

DBEternal · 2024-06-29T17:23:40+00:00

there's sort of a divine justice in good looking guys banging all the women while rich wealthy men have to pay for it

but at the end of the day it doesn't really fix anything because ugly rich men will always control the water, power and grain

thedarkracer · 2024-06-29T14:59:28+00:00

Yeah sure.

Upset_Material_3372 · 2024-06-30T06:42:40+00:00

Sure. Anything’s better than nothing.

Title	Men below 30, would you date a woman who used to be a sugarbaby? Maybe she used a sugar dady thrice her age to cover law school fees or something
Author	Independent_Year
Upvotes	0
Comments	114
Date	June 29, 2024 2:40 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1drcnve/men_below_30_would_you_date_a_woman_who_used_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-below-30-would-you-date-a-woman-who-used-to-be.1522770 https://theredarchive.com/post/1522770

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