What alternatives to therapy would you like society to provide?

Advencctv · 2025-07-20T13:39:35+00:00

In all honesty men don’t want therapy because we are not interested in coping or learning to cope. We want material change and hopefully concessions from others to our own benefit at the other persons possible detriment. I will find the link if I can but I believe they did a study on incels in therapy for about a year or two and found of the sample population (which was small in this study to be fair) had little to change in mental health, ideology or world view. We want what other people are getting, not therapy. And I’m not interested in being told I should be content with not being in a romantic relationship.

non-decision · 2025-07-20T08:42:27+00:00

[permanently deleted]

kvakerok_v2 · 2025-07-21T23:30:04+00:00

First, let's address the fact that therapy for men is bullshit. Allow me to elaborate: if a man is facing a situation that's causing him to have negative emotions, he needs to be pragmatically working on extricating himself from it, or eliminating said situation altogether. The negative emotions are a motivator.

Men who have insecurities are already broken. They've allowed someone's shitty opinion to infiltrate and erode their ego. Could they go to a therapist and get an ego boost? Yes. But if their dick was small before, it's still small after, if they were ugly before, they're still ugly, therapy doesn't change the fundamental premise of their insecurity. This weak and vulnerable man needs a paradigm change to rid oneself from insecurity and embrace one's flaws, and I'm yet to see a therapist that introduced that to anyone.

Unfortunately, there are also insecurities that will forever place a man on the bottom rung of societal hierarchy and no amount of therapy will uplift him.

Second, clinical depression, bpd, schizo are all issues that require psychiatric evaluation by non-quack doctors (not therapists). They also require medication.

In my city they actually provide free gym membership to low income households, I think it should be for all men starting with at least elementary. It will promote healthy lifestyle, help boys become familiar with equipment early on, etc.

Make PE mandatory for boys, invest in high school gyms. Instead of deadbeats hire former athletes and bodybuilders to teach PE.

Muscletov · 2025-07-20T09:44:45+00:00

Stop linking a man's romantic failure to his moral virtue or work ethic.

anonymousppd123123 · 2025-07-20T11:16:27+00:00

Community

IridikronsNo1Fan · 2025-07-20T10:05:09+00:00

Aye, free gym memberships would help. As well as more gyms so that you aren't just standing around and waiting for people to finish their sets. Outdoor gyms. More local bodybuilding and powerlifting competitions. Also free beer gift cards.

Free Steam and streaming service subscriptions. Bring the damn inflation down so that you can afford groceries and bills without having to work your ass off.

More manly man entertainment like shows about cars, big muscles and epic adventures.

Seriously, it's not hard at all to keep dudes happy. I'm at my happiest when I start the day with a couple of hours of lifting at the gym and then spend the rest of the day chugging beer and having fun with my hobbies.

Logos1789 · 2025-07-20T08:51:49+00:00

Why would you presume that there’s a solution?

Most people’s lives objectively suck, especially juxtaposed against the ever wealthier, wealthy people.

Sure, they’re miserable, but they don’t have to worry about the main things that normal people worry about.

Sure, they’re mortal, but they get the best care available.

Why would someone be happy if they literally need to work almost every single day of their adult lives, just to barely get by?

It’s not a coincidence that some of the main sins are deleting yourself, sloth, stealing, etc…TO KEEP PEOPLE WORKING!!!

MisterFunnyShoes · 2025-07-20T11:12:45+00:00

Lift, find and pursue your mission, don’t fall into one of many of life’s traps (addiction, knocking up a girl, overspending, marriage, etc.)

And no. Free gym membership would do nothing. Gyms are cheap. People fail to take care of their fitness because they lack discipline, not because they’re poor.

Stergeary · 2025-07-20T23:14:18+00:00

While women benefit more from engaging emotionally through words, it seems like men benefit more from engaging physically through action. Specifically, with other men, towards a common goal that is larger than themselves, and against common obstacles that they cooperate to overcome. Just like how therapy is in essence a clinically directed emotional conversation, I believe men need the equivalent of a clinically directed physical bootcamp where they can fulfill those three requirements above -- male camaraderie, greater cause, and overcoming obstacles.

abaxeron · 2025-07-20T09:11:02+00:00

Oof. I've seen this before. First of all, I approve of midnight_blue77 - we don't need alternatives to astrology or tarot reading. But here are some crucial steps society as a whole could take to make men's lives better:

Food and drinks - most processed food available in an average grocery store is oversugared and oversalted. It doesn't make you feel sated, you eat more of it, you get fat, you turn into a whiny bitch, you put extra pressure on your heart, and you die of heart attack. ALL of available data indicate that this affects men much more than women.

Schedule - several data points indicate that men have differently placed and differently shaped circadian rhythm; you can look up the details, but also virtually all data indicate that men get less sleep than women, which is a huge stress factor with tendency to accumulate over time. Men's schedule should not be tailored to women's; if it means separate workplaces and schools, let men have separate workplaces and schools. Same goes for hospitals.

Men are viscerally disgusted by, and don't have 3 hours for, standing in line, or repeatedly calling a reception to make an appointment, or punching through a swarmed online application form. Once a resource distribution is clogged, women (and very few "woman-minded" men) will be the only ones getting it. No resource distribution should be clogged. Places like hospitals should have separate personnel to deal with perfectly healthy hypohondriac repeat attention seekers. Men should not adapt to the imperfect system; the imperfect system should accomodate men.

Space, silence, solitude - men should have access to quality uninterrupted rest.

And yes, gym is great too. If it's too boring to repeatedly drag some weight up and down, start an association of plumbata throwing enthusiasts, or competitive manual phone charging.

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ViolentShallot · 2025-07-20T09:37:32+00:00

First off, I don't think therapy is a scam. But it's on a bit of a pedestal, and has some critical issues:

First, we need to understand that there are as many crappy therapists as there are crappy software developers or crappy teachers. Psychology is a relatively easy degree after all.

Yet it's really hard -and expensive- to try out more than 2 or 3 therapists. And it's hard to determine whether one isn't working due to you or due to them being a useless idiot with a degree. Takes time to see if one is worth the time.

Second (like school, but that's another whole can of worms) is geared mostly towards women. The assumption that men are somehow wrong and need to be fixed because they aren't women is pure toxin for society. Again, there are therapists (behavioral, for instance) that relatively help with that situation, but that's the exception, not the rule.

Third, and this is a pointy one (and builds on the former issues), therapy is one of those businesses where doing good loses you clients. That means that therapists that "listen and validate" and "make the client feel good" will thrive, while those that don't offer justifications, hold the person accountable, bruise their self image, and generally guide the person towards becoming better struggle. This also builds on the second point as men don't benefit at all from "feeling heard" or "feeling valid" or all that crap. Generally speaking, the one thing that would help men is being given direction and told what we are fucking up at, and that... doesn't really pay. Specially with women, who are the core demographic.

Finally, and somehow related, therapy is considered a panacea. Many times you're unhappy because your life is shit. And while a good therapist will indicate what you are doing to keep your life being shit, because of point 3, there aren't many of those. And because of point 1, you're not likely to be able to find it.

As for what should society do: make being a teacher an extremely competitive, extremely well paid career, and stop subsidizing and encouraging single mothers.

Advencctv · 2025-07-20T13:34:46+00:00

Create an environment where the cost women experience when they express their hypergamy becomes so exponentially high that it becomes in their best self interest not to be hypergamous. Like a disproportionately severe adverse incentive structure. I place order and stability as higher principles than fairness and equality or equity.

projecteddesperation · 2025-07-20T15:37:28+00:00

A lot of people on Reddit calling men incels and telling them to go to therapy suffer from a superiority complex and/or misandry. It's not therapy that needs to change, it's who needs to go to therapy and why.

petellapain · 2025-07-20T16:00:35+00:00

I don't want society to provide anything. I want ot to stop placing barriers, regulations and red tape around mens natural ability to thrive

AreOut · 2025-07-20T17:24:45+00:00

Not gaslighting men would be a good start. A lot of men don't realise the "game" and get disappointed time and time again thinking there is something wrong with them.

Master-Praline3326 · 2025-07-20T20:00:36+00:00

I often see people in online discussions say this kind of stuff when the subject of therapy comes up. Therapy is a scam/therapy doesn't work/therapy doesn't work for men/therapy is too expensive etc.

I think, there are therapist just looking at your pockets and there are therapist looking at your eyes. Therapy is a long process and not cannot be solved with just talking. Even some people can solve their problem without therapy even many therapist say we don't need therapy but something in our live needs to change and it is something not we can control over(Economy, Politics, Men's live on society, expectations)

Now, I am not a believer in the miraculous effect of therapy either. Therapy can be hard to get, and it's not a magic fix that instantly makes brain problems go away for people. However, many people DO report feeling and doing better after going to therapy, so I think it's at least worth a shot for people who are struggling in life in some form, be it in dating or other avenues.

I think because of there is something men cannot be speak about because they know they going to be ignored and punish by society in general. So therapy lets them to tell their problems right away. I heard from a therapist saying to men you don't need a therapist just someone who will listen you dearly.

So this question is mostly for those who espouse that therapy is a complete scam, doesn't work, doesn't work for men etc. in retaliation to the suggestions that men who struggle with dating should see a therapist to get over their fear of rejection, insecurities, social awrygoings and so on, but also believe that 'society doesn't give a crap about men' and that society should do more to help struggling men. What alternative for therapy do you think society should provide? What should someone who suffers from severe mental health problems like depression, bipolar, schizophrenia etc do? If your response is 'go to the gym' do you think a free gym membership for men with mental problems would do the trick?

I went to therapy, not for my masculinity but I had a form of OCD or I think or might be not OCD. For years of suffering from it, I just realized I got scammed in some areas and it made me more furious than for my OCD and I hated being scammed than having OCD then allowed every bad to come to my mind and accept them to happen to people then i started to not feel my OCD but neither bad thoughts stop coming.

I don't think a guy doesn't need a therapist if his problem not so serious. I think he should first enter a environment where he can talk with everything everyone even women so he can understand women can speak about things like men. My friend had fear from women until he find a woman he can speak everything about.

Actually society itself doesn't give a shit about most people but those who scream louder. I think it would be great if we men and women could express our suffering each other and our expectations from each other better could help each other better.

For someone who have severe problem's solutions can be lie with therapy or actual changes on their lives I think it depends on ratio of men in general.

Apologizes for my bad English.

BlessdRTheFreaks · 2025-07-20T20:17:42+00:00

I think the self is the source of our unease. I don't think amplifying its stories by giving them energy in the therapy office makes us happier or better adjusted.

I think ritual is how we've kept our spirits up and deeply connected in the past -- bonfires, drum-circles, stories around the fire, wrestling and ecstatic dance.

Vaudeville_Clown · 2025-07-20T21:18:21+00:00

You know.. I'm not adverse to therapy so perhaps I shouldn't answer but I still feel this is relevant.

I want to see large scale state-funded psychology outreach programs, intended to help suffering young men. Right about the fuck now actually.

Only something like this would prove that society actually cares about men's lonliness and rampant suicidality. To put it's money where it's mouth is.

It would cost big time. Maybe we would have to slash some cultural funding, build less roads or whatever.

But absolutely nothing is happening politically regarding men's health ffs. This in itself is undeniable proof society doesn't care.

Ooh, and writing a couple of concerned articles in Washington Post about men in crisis, where the manhating tone is slightly reduced for the day, that's worth nothing. All men can spot the lies.

But nearly all female voters would go nuts at the idea if, for once we were spending tax money exclusively on groups of men. Hell even those who are supposedly socialist and for equality would be the most raging opponents.

So it is impossible this will ever happen.

torytho · 2025-07-20T21:26:31+00:00

I think if every citizen had security in their basic needs: food, shelter, etc. that’d go a long way to making therapy unnecessary for a lot of people.

Comfortable-Dare-307 · 2025-07-20T21:43:44+00:00

Therapy works great for me. Been in it for 25 years on and off.

DelDivision · 2025-07-21T04:44:14+00:00

There is no alt, either they can improve, cope with not being attractive or they can do the thing that rhymes with cope. Like others have said, if it cant fix the problem then therapy is useless to us.

No-Rough-7390 · 2025-07-21T10:30:02+00:00

For men? They simply need to start doing shit.

LoudPiece6914 · 2025-07-21T13:37:31+00:00

For issues like bipolar, schizophrenia, those kind of things you really do need to see a professional. But the arguments that it’s expensive, at least in an American context, or difficult to access our legitimate problems. Healthcare should not be for profit, but that’s a different issue. But for those problems, they need to encourage and provide a real pathway for men to become therapist or psychologist to better serve the population of struggling men.

For depression, we need low barrier to entry ways for men to have community and purpose. So have pathways for people to serve their community and find meaning without having to fill out a bunch of applications or go through interview processes. Just let people help. To build community, have free or low cost sports leave or other social things so that men can get together at a regular time and do stuff together. The problem is too many people are struggling so much and don’t have time to be able to take advantage of this or our system will find ways to unnecessarily monetize portions or put in place other barriers. If you’re doing OK, you might think this is not a big deal but the people who need to help the most our least, able to jump through those hoops.

2025-07-21T17:28:15+00:00

I think there’s a misconception that all therapists are left wing psychos who will push you down that path of thinking. I’ve had a few different therapists at this point and have had a couple who you would think are not going to give a shit about men’s problems but they were very fair and understanding and in no way made me feel like I’m a jerk for complaining about the things we complain about here. In some cases they were 100% supportive and I was very surprised that a lady therapist would be taking my side in some cases pertaining to purple pill debate topics.

Mad_Mundy · 2025-07-20T10:12:14+00:00

At the end of the day, I think a lot of men jump into therapy when they're not ready for it, they deal with one therapist and they think that there's nothing out there for them.

Even up to the start of this year, despite moving past the Red Pill and that sort of mentality in my life, I still hated the idea of therapy, and thought it was a waste of time, until one day I decided I was ready to give it another go, I started through my TAFE (community college for Americans) I got sessions free of charge, which probably helped, and I felt like the therapy was starting to be effective.

Therapy works, but you need to be willing to engage, ready to commit and you need the right person guiding you along. Anyone who says therapy doesn't work at all is extremely close-minded and probably isn't someone worth talking to, they don't know what they're saying.

James_M_Croft · 2025-07-21T18:53:09+00:00

Most of modern therapy is mostly about lying to yourself

It has neutral consequences at best, and negative ones at worst for men. There is no problem if yet another woman is deluded, but that becomes an issue if a man is deluded too. Men are those who bring their own happiness and the happiness of others.

What alternative for therapy do you think society should provide?

Male spaces away from women, preferably with other men.

Just leaving spaces where men can be themselves rest, reflect and maybe even ask for actual help from actually competent individuals would be fair enough.

Gaming was this place for many before the feminists attacked.

What should someone who suffers from severe mental health problems like depression, bipolar, schizophrenia etc do?

A male? Work on himself. Unless he has a family capable and willing to sustain him. He has no other option.

If your response is 'go to the gym' do you think a free gym membership for men with mental problems would do the trick?

Gym is just a place where many can find the the time they need not engaging with people(metaphorically) and some feel good hormones.

It would not help much.

No_Self_2165 · 2025-07-20T08:32:15+00:00

Legalization and destigmatization of the sex work and safely being able to access to it could work I think. Maybe a public fund to financially aid those men as well.

throwaway73737828 · 2025-07-20T08:46:40+00:00

I mean schizophrenia is a whole another topic for mental health, but other that you dont need to go to a therapist, and if society really wants men to be better, they shold give more job paths that can make you rich, like you said free gym membership, remove porn all together, remove social media and dating apps, and make a law for men that they can’t be obese. And then men would live good asf. However this will not happen because there is a deeper issue that is going on with this topic, the elites dont want men to be powerful. They monatize and try to cancel men who talk about this topic on social media.

midnight_blue77 · 2025-07-20T08:39:48+00:00

This is like asking what are alternatives to astrology and bullshit-artistry we would like to see. How about none? How about just ending the BS? Stop selling fake illnesses to the gullible in order to sell them BS cures? How about that?

Title	What alternatives to therapy would you like society to provide?
Author	non-decision
Upvotes	16
Comments	232
Date	July 20, 2025 8:24 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1m4jrr0/what_alternatives_to_therapy_would_you_like/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-alternatives-to-therapy-would-you-like.1557596 https://theredarchive.com/post/1557596

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