Your wake up call.

Edward189181 · 2025-02-26T15:18:55+00:00

The truth: "he has been the sole provider for well over 20 years" The Narrative: "have been financially controlled for so long".

They're always the victim, never the one abusing someone's good nature, and taking advantage.

Fijigeo · 2025-02-26T14:46:27+00:00

Joining a women’s only group is like reading your girlfriend’s diary. You are going to get angry because you do it to find shit to confirm your beliefs. Also looking at the post, I have to say she doesn’t sound that horrible. Financial support and financially controlling are very different things….

warrior_up · 2025-02-26T14:28:48+00:00

Divorce probability and outcomes is a class that should be taught/offered at every junior college and university- call is psychology, call it rich dad poor dad/finances - marrying the wrong women can/will change your life.

5 years later, I’m still going through silver bullet, heinous accusations of abusing my own flesh and blood, hundreds of thousands of dollars still being wasted away by a women who is so miserable and filled with hate, for a divorce she pushed for (just like this women) and refuses to move on, ruining her own children just because I’m not living in a cardboard box underneath the freeway yet.

Women get away with this, my ex has been caught red handed lying and purguring herself under oath with NO consequences, they don’t even make them pay the court costs. The courts quite literally enable and award them for laundering both families hard earned money and financial futures into the courts hands. No one has rescued my boys, they don’t care about the kids, or the husband facing prison for false allegations. Silver bullet divorce, scorned women with personality disorders due to false external validation of social media

Arguably the scariest shit any man with kids can face and it’s happening more than 50% of the time.

Be very aware men, teach your sons, as early as you can - one false sexual abuse claim/charge in their younger years, can follow them for the rest of their lives. If they ever go through a divorce and this is discovered they can/will be falsely imprisoned via accusations and parental alienation. Kids will lie for mom because that’s what they’re told/manipulated to do. This is no joke. These women have no boundaries, they can rationalize all of their demonic behavior, even their own kids are weaponized. I’ve gone through 6 false allegations, investigations CPS and criminal - many men have had worse, 20-30-40 false allegations…it will ruin even the strongest of men

Think about it, we’re all abusive if you ask our exs. That’s the narrative they maintain to go hop on the cock carousel, when that joy ride ends and they’ve been used enough they come back to ruin the man they should have stayed with, the one that begged them not to break up the family that tried to use reason and logic - that came back to try again, none of it matters. Fuck them, protect yourselves at all times, when these women utter the word divorce, they are from that moment moving forward an enemy and should be treated as such. Say nothing, use lawyers and never ever talk to them or give them an inch, you have to go scorched earth for your own livelihood.

AirSailer · 2025-02-26T14:21:00+00:00

Any tips on setting up a female profile and getting into one of these groups? I've wondered if my ex has been talking on them. I will go on playdates with my kid and another kid's mom and after a couple meetups I get ghosted. I'm straight business with small talk, nothing personal and definitely no flirting or really anything that can be misinterpreted as me making a move. First I thought she was speaking directly to them, but then I would set up the meet without my ex knowing and the same thing happens, which then made me think the women just assumed I was interested. But now I think it's one of these groups. My ex is on FB 24/7 posting bullshit about how she's a struggling single mother who has to overcome years of trauma (i.e. me), so she's a prime candidate for entry into these groups.

HuumanDriftWood · 2025-02-26T08:18:16+00:00

Seems that these Facebook groups are a pool of deadbeat women dead set on ruining good men.

It's a Petri Dish just set on proliferation of these mindsets.

redshoetom · 2025-02-26T02:28:12+00:00

Disgusting

dadplup · 2025-02-26T01:14:56+00:00

I was married for almost 19 years, she wanted to be a sahm and she was until I found out she was cheating with a guy who was unemployed and living with his mom, when I found out he dumped her faster than anything I've ever seen before, we tried to work it out, at least I tried, but when I found messages between her and her friends talking about how she was waiting for someone better to come along before dumping me and making me pay thru the nose, how she wasn't being treated the way she deserved to be treated, I stopped trying, our daughter was about 8 at the time. For the record the woman couldn't even write a grocery list, she wouldn't clean or cook or really do anything other than sleep all day and play the Sims at night while I had 2 jobs

Nexw told me she wanted a house a new car and to have a baby, I only agreed to try to get the house and car only if she got a job herself, as far as a baby I suggested we tried only until we were 38 and if it didn't happen we would stop, she agreed to it.

Yet she couldn't keep a job for longer than a few months at the time, then covid hit, and we hit 40 without conceiving. Things got worse, and finally broke down. I stayed because I could tell how unprepared for life she was and how she could take my daughter down with her, so I filed for divorce I built my case and I got lucky enough to get custody of my kid, she was almost 17 by then and chose to stay with me.

I never wanted a maid ,I wanted a partner but she wanted to be treated like a queen while treating me like a peon, it got so bad that out of the 3 kids(my 2 stepsons and our daugher) none are speaking to her and do not interact with her, yet she blamed me for it. Not all women are like that but some do really take the cake

NothingIsEverEnough · 2025-02-25T18:09:19+00:00

What are you doing with your own life? Move on

Sansiera · 2025-02-25T10:54:53+00:00

Sounds like she gave up her career to raise kids and he doesn't acknowledge her unpaid labor. She was dependent on him financially and was never free, and now that she had enough of the verbal abuse that probably went like"you're lazy and bring nothing to the table and I work", she finally wants to leave but she has no work experience. So yes, he's the ungrateful asshole and I hope she leaves

Fuzzy-Delivery799 · 2025-02-25T05:49:43+00:00

The entitlement has gotten out of control.

Left-Signature-5250 · 2025-02-25T05:03:48+00:00

Jup - one of the bigger reasons she left was because I did all the financial lifting, and she sort of depended on my agreeing to larger expenses.

"We" (I) had just bought a house for our family - a huge mortgage. My number one priority was to reduce the mortgage early on and fast, so I worked my ass off and also wanted to not go on bigger vacations to save money. Also, the kids were 2 and 4, and honestly, it was not a great vision for me to go on vacation with two small children. Sounded more stressful than enjoyable.

Mind you, we lived in a beautiful house, with a beautiful yard for the kids - exactly what she always wanted.

But the only thing I received was not gratitude but constant nagging that we "never" go on vacation, and she is already so bored in the house and frustrated.

Give me a break! And then it escalated to exactly this: suddenly, I was financially abusive, and why does she not get the freedom of doing what she wants?!

That was only one aspect of the marriage going downhill fast, but at major one.

She went on little trips on her own (leaving me to take care of the kids while still working my ass off). On one of these, she must have met her affair partner which ultimately must have been such a great guy that she decided to divorce me and break up our family.

Fuck her, fuck all women. I will never ever let anyone get so closely involved and entangled with me that they have any financial say over me and my own earned money.

Of course I was robbed blind in the divorce and basically had to pay for the house a second time over.

Enough_Youth_4564 · 2025-02-25T03:43:02+00:00

That was probably the bitch I married

tragicaddiction · 2025-02-25T03:25:21+00:00

I am called financially abusive because I wanted us to budget.

When we were discussing how much to save and I asked how much she needed per month beyond the fundamentals , so just for spending money, I was now controlling and she made a point that her friends agreed

She had no concept of saving and hid thousands of personal credit card debt

EvalCrux · 2025-02-25T03:15:59+00:00

My stbxw claimed I financially abused her then requested 7k/month thinking she deserved it.

She also said marriage was a business.

I can only imagine what fb groups she was in. She has few friends that mostly drop her w the weather and give her horrible advice. In hindsight. But they’ve been ‘besties since middle school’ so they are oddly higher up the priority list.

CRobinsFly · 2025-02-25T02:57:51+00:00

Men are in love and women are in business.

Once you grow and study the marriage wheel, it will change your entire perspective on women. I don't hate them, I understand them now, but I can't ever love them again.

SuprisinglyBigCock · 2025-02-25T02:36:40+00:00

Society and the legal system are incentivizing bad behavior in women. Men act badly, too, especially if they are well-resourced and/or immature.

Zealousideal_Try_864 · 2025-02-25T02:35:01+00:00

I’ve been pretty content with my hand so far.

Maybe one day I’ll forget all the bullshit I went through and complicate my life again.

misskaminsk · 2025-02-25T02:24:53+00:00

Get out of the women’s groups.

hawaiiscuba23 · 2025-02-25T00:33:28+00:00

I’m still married and agree completely that it is emotional warfare. We have two kids and I have committed to sticking this out until they’re 18. The great part is she’s aware of my desire for her to get help. Over the past 25 years I haven’t been perfect, neither of us have but now that the kids are complaining about her behavior it helps reinforce what I’ve been saying forever.

Years ago when we were in our mid twenties we had an issue happen that she would never let go. Somehow she’s held this over my head for 20+ years. Long story short we were living together, we were in the master bath that then leads into the bedroom and then the hallway. Big argument ensues, she’s up in my face pushing every button she can. Pushing me physically, hitting me in the chest and preventing me from leaving. As I was sneaking past her she lost her footing and fell into the closet cracking the mirrored door. She then blocked me from leaving the bedroom, I lost my shit, punched the wall and left. Over the years she’s tried using that against me and I’ve always just let it go because it isn’t worth the argument.

She brought it up recently claiming I pushed her into that door and I had had enough. I bluntly spelled out the specifics of that whole ordeal, that as the guy I took all fault because I lost my cool but I reminded her that I never hit or pushed her, I reminded her how the whole thing came to be and then reminded her of her involvement. That she was the one escalating as I was trying to deescalate. She brought up me punching the wall and after this many years it was easy to say that I did that instead of getting physical and moving her, or using force to get by her. It’s amazing after all these years how far this story has devolved from the truth. I can only imagine how many variations of that lie have been told. It doesn’t even matter anymore. Point is that she remembers the mirrored door and hole in the wall but doesn’t remember the details or how we got there. It was an example of her using her gender and size to manipulate the situation and at the end of the day she was the one instigating and pushing for a fight. It ended as good as it could have because I didn’t react to her crazy the way I could have.

So yes, all of these years and I’m just now learning the phrase emotional warfare and you can’t find a phrase more fitting.

CopperTylenol · 2025-02-25T00:31:31+00:00

The real question is, did you make your fake profile pic a hot chick or a troll.

Any-Dare-7261 · 2025-02-25T00:30:25+00:00

She wrote the letter to the court with all the boxes checked for her “editors” to look at and make it more believable for the incoming Silver Bullet Method Divorce.

Odd-Yoghurt1869 · 2025-02-24T23:23:02+00:00

Why didn’t she get a job then? Did the man put a gun to her head and say she couldn’t work?

Curious_Helicopter29 · 2025-02-24T23:15:51+00:00

It takes more than simply providing to be a good husband. He may have been a total bastard to live with.

BornMaybe9902 · 2025-02-24T23:15:06+00:00

I think the hatred you see toward women in this sub is pretty strong as well.

Men get burned. Blame women.

Women get burned. Blame men.

Everyone’s a narcissist according to the other ex spouse. Everyone was gaslighted. Different side of the same coin.

Ok-Guidance6491 · 2025-02-24T23:06:05+00:00

I think most women would readily agree that most men are ill-equipped for the level of emotional warfare that a woman brings into a relationship. I just think it’s laughable when a woman says a man is “emotional abusive”. Like he has anywhere near the skills that a woman does when it comes to emotional warfare.

Dialetic212 · 2025-02-24T23:01:13+00:00

you missed the part where it said he is abusive. she didnt just wake up and decide to get divorced.

Sad-Present-1077 · 2025-02-24T22:59:23+00:00

Cool. You don’t believe abuse victims 👍

One_Wolverine1323 · 2025-02-24T22:58:37+00:00

That guy needs to see this!

UnimportantOutcome67 · 2025-02-24T22:53:31+00:00

Nah, Bro'.

Nowhere near enough information to make anything close to an informed opinion.

You're cherry-picking and making the data fit your narrative.

And don't call me a simp. Check my post/comment history.

DenyHerYourEssence · 2025-02-24T22:50:29+00:00

In all honesty that post is tame compared to what some women say in their venting TikTok videos. I see them via reaction videos on YouTube and it’s some of the most insufferable content you can consume. Imagine videos of women saying things like men taking women to dinner and on vacations is “bare minimum” activity that only benefits guys. Apparently “real men” (simps) give women lavish gifts and pay their bills, even if they aren’t married.

suspicious_bag_1000 · 2025-02-24T22:48:40+00:00

Why are you snooping on women’s Facebook sites with fake profiles? What’s happening to this sub?

Comfortable-Angle660 · 2025-02-24T22:45:33+00:00

“Abusive” and “financially controlling” … I know the drill, translation: She wanted to spend without limits, and the money ran up, possibly large amounts of debt … or he said “no” for some outlandish request.

a_day_at_a_timee · 2025-02-24T22:24:09+00:00

The entitlement she has to the money he earns is so strong that she considers him not wanting to pay it abuse. Verbally abusive or not she will milk this guy for every last penny over the next decade.

Moms_Sketti88 · 2025-02-24T22:20:18+00:00

Then what’s crazy is when the female is abusive no one cares. The response I’ve got on Reddit and from other women especially is, “well you must have done something to make her attack you”. That’s also the bullshit narrative her and her bitch attorney are going with. I “provoke” her to be attacked? Oh ok, yeah, I totally like being kicked in the nuts when she doesn’t get her way. Reverse the roles? You’d be in prison for felony domestic violence. Crazy world man.

thriller1122 · 2025-02-24T22:19:52+00:00

So you infer that he has been working his ass off, but ignore that he has been abusive to her? Like, Im not trying to say women don't do crazy things, but how is this it?

Title	Your wake up call.
Author	Feisty-Ad-566
Upvotes	39
Comments	103
Date	February 24, 2025 10:12 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ixemii/your_wake_up_call/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/your-wake-up-call.1544862 https://theredarchive.com/post/1544862

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