"Giving up on modern ........."

Legitimate_Type_1324 · 2024-04-03T14:55:35+00:00

The problem is the literal internet-fueled fuckfest we got into.

Everyone now loves sex and to have a wild sexy life and every is about sex but no one wants to deal with the consequences that this fuckfest culture generates, such as:

1) The perceived loss of loyalty from both sides: all men are pigs all women are hoes.

Women will leave you for the rich Chad or Tyrone because you're not rich enough or hot enough.

Men will leave you for the hot secretary once you get saggy.

2) The perceived loss of what people truly want. When everyone just wants to be loved and belong. Such as:

Men only want one thing and it's disgusting

Women are golddiggers

3) The impossibility to call out this madness without being cancelled as a prude, misogynist or whatever.

4) The actual desensitization, both physical and mental, that comes with promiscuity, excessive porn use, excessive masturbation, etc.

And of course, all thanks to social media which allows any voice, no matter how stupid, to raise and affect the minds of thousands of people in an instant.

The people that can disconnect from being a fucking horny, neurotic NPC and find partners are laughing at everyone else including duck faced Instagram thots, idiotic gymbros, and every "relationship coach" who doesn't even know what a credential is.

LoFiPanda14 · 2024-04-03T15:13:42+00:00

Everyone trying to be the main character but are NPCs.

PMmeareasontolive · 2024-04-03T15:26:26+00:00

I don't think either group is the problem per se. We are free to be whatever we want and have whatever kind of relationships we want: as long as we can meet someone compatible who shares that same vision and those same values. But somehow it's become extremely difficult to meet those people we would be compatible with.

As an old song goes; "if I could meet em I could get em, but as yet I haven't met em"

In general, I think men are in a worse place in terms of having to conform to gender stereotypes or be rejected preemptively. Women can be tomboys, femmes, demure or assertive, and it all works for them. Guys tend to have to be some form of a stoic-yet-assertive masculine ideal still.

Safinated · 2024-04-03T15:11:11+00:00

Both are giving up

Because lots of people suck. This is neither wrong nor surprising

MassiveAd1026 · 2024-04-03T15:28:14+00:00

Men today have more in common with men of 1950, than women today have in common with women of 1950.

Men are still expected to protect women, and the vast majority of men still do. Men are still expected to make more money than their wives, and be the head of household, that's still true most of the time.

The traditional gender roles of men are mostly still intact. Men today still protect and provide, just like our grandfathers did.

Women today in 2024, have abandoned their traditional gender roles from the 1950's. Yet, women still want the men to keep on being traditional, and chivalrous, and get down on one knee, etc.

Traditional women saved themselves for marriage, they were not proud to be promiscuous. They didn't date multiple men at the same time, etc.

Women today have radically changed, compared to how women used to be.

Dull-Laugh-4037 · 2024-04-03T21:14:50+00:00

It's clear Women have all the leverage in the dating marketplace. If women are upset about the options in the dating world they need to start rewarding the men with the type of character and values they claim to value themselves and want in a partner. They have the control.

Truth is, actions speak louder than words, and women gravitate to the tallest, smoothest talking, rich guys. Everything else is mostly an afterthought. What women don't seem to realize is that by natural consequence, these type of guys likely have poor charachter qualities.

Men who are filthy rich, while it is possible they got there from honest hardwork, many, particularly young & rich ones, have got there from taking advatage and exploiting others. Some others inherited all their money and have a spoiled and entitled personality. Some may have been involved in illegal activities to get their money. Usually getting rich takes time and years of dilligent investing. So it should actually be somewhat of a caution flag when a guy has alot of money.

Additionally, the smoothest talking, exciting, experienced guy who women tend to be atttracted to as well, should raise red flags too. To be the most interesting at times requires a guy to overshare and go all out to keep your interest. This is unsustainable behavior, but guys will do this with the intent of trying to get laid. They will say all the right things, push the right buttons, maybe have some tricks to keep your interest, and lead you on like there is relationship potential, when they only are interested in sleeping with you. Stop dating these shallow type of charachters. Reward men who hold themselves to a high standard and are men of charachter. But these guys are often overlooked for maybe being a but akward/shy at first, or not being materialistically rich, or tall, etc.

Teflon08191 · 2024-04-03T17:33:04+00:00

For women, "giving up on men" is just a trendy statement. You can't "give up" on passively waiting for an attractive man to approach and initiate something with you.

Conversely, men "giving up on women" by no longer approaching/initiating are legitimately ending any prospective relationships.

It's like leaving your hook in the water just in case vs reeling it in and going home.

So as far as who is really the one going away? Men. If men don't initiate, relationships don't happen. Everything women do (or say) is downstream from that.

Bekiala · 2024-04-03T15:13:06+00:00

It is just the pits when you have to date humans. Humans are just so damn flawed (-;

meangingersnap · 2024-04-03T15:36:37+00:00

Industrial Revolution and its consequences

DFVSoldHisOptions · 2024-04-03T15:35:44+00:00

if you don't commit and date around for fun, it works pretty well in current environment.

obviousredflag · 2024-04-03T14:52:11+00:00

Who is the problem and who is the one really going away ?

You need to zoom out. What group within men and women is making those statements? The single ones. Most of men and women are not single. They found the "good men" and "good women", who commit, who fulfill each other's needs for gender roles etc.

Look at reviews of nightclubs on maps. The people who give 1 star reviews and hate everything about the club are.... the people who got rejected at the door.

We are seeing the same thing. The people who are not successful in mating think the other side is at fault, because that is easier than to confront themselves with the thought that they are the issue themselves, because most others have no issue and are happy in their long term romantic relationships with the other sex.

When you just look at the losers in the mating game, you will only get the delusional views of frustrated losers who don't want to attribute their outcome to their own flaws.

Nellylocheadbean · 2024-04-03T15:24:07+00:00

Think of it as the job market. The best jobs are taken off the market asap and ppl never leave those jobs while the rest of us fend for the crap jobs, stay for a while then leave for another crap job and it’s a cycle.

The best ppl for relationships match up and are taken off the market asap and stay in their healthy marriage/relationship. Everyone else probably match up with a not so ideal person (even though they’re not ideal neither), stay for a while and eventually moves on to another not so ideal person and the cycle continues.

Belfura · 2024-04-03T16:08:58+00:00

Part of it is the nature of online discourse, but generally speaking all of the well-adjusted people that are single don't often run into a well-adjusted person from the opposite gender. This becomes worse online. I genuinely believe that either way, you'll have better outcomes meeting people offline

John_Oakman · 2024-04-03T16:37:00+00:00

When moral virtues are completely decoupled from material results/consequences, then it is not surprising that the materialists will outcompete the moralists.

ChicoBrillo · 2024-04-03T18:54:52+00:00

Love, romance, and sex has always been one of the greatest of human desires. There are a million movies, books, songs, etc about it. It has never been easy for anybody at any point in time, it's something that's always been characterized by difficulty, pain, and emotions.

People are always going to find a scapegoat to blame, love is a battlefield, you most certainly are going to endure some pain and suffering when you get romantically involved with someone.

So yeah, people will be complaining about modern men and women until the universe dies of heat death.

nonplussedminus · 2024-04-03T19:34:04+00:00

You're basically asking foxes why they won't eat the grapes... no sane, well adjusted person would discard the entire opposite gender as trash

HumpsyDumpsy · 2024-04-04T03:24:08+00:00

It's intersting! I can't remember the title of the book but it was written in the 1940s, but took place in the 1920s, the male characters complain about the modern women of that time, for being too opinioned and bold with their clothing and attitude. But then whats ironic is the olden days are glorified as a time where all the women are traditional sweethearts who are more pleasant than the modern women of 2024.

Dating in general is difficult, but people don't realize thats how it is, and basically necessary. Every one is looking for the yin to their yang ☯️, and that's not a simple task. People have a glorified idea of dating where they believe its all butterflies 🦋 and rainbows 🌈 so when they see the reality, that sometimes it is ugly and scary, people don't wanna put up with it and just claim something is wrong with the men/women of their time.

In 100 year from now, our great grandchildren will be complaining about how they hate the modern men and women of their time

Blitted_Master · 2024-04-03T17:59:52+00:00

The solution is a return to nature/tradition.

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2024-04-03T17:14:05+00:00

As much as both sides complain about each other, the only side I see actually taking action is men. The amount of western men I see overseas has tripled in the last five years. These men aren't just coming on vacation either, they are setting down roots and creating families. The only thing I see alot modern women doing is giving up on finding their ideal partner and either entering into casual relationships permanently or just dropping out of dating all together

EulenWatcher · 2024-04-03T14:50:32+00:00

There are struggling men and women and some of them cope with their struggles by convincing themselves and others that the problem lies in the opposite gender. It isn’t just their personal problem but something is wrong with half of population hence they struggle.

Statistically less single women are interested in dating so you could say that women “give up on men” more often than vice versa. It’s up to a debate how many women have given up on men and how many are just comfortable with being single though. Not because they’re angry or pissed with men but either because they just aren’t cut out for relationships or they’re way too comfortable with being single, their needs are met without a partner and they don’t want to give up on that.

Fabulous_HonestTea · 2024-04-03T18:44:59+00:00

so who is giving up on who

Men are giving up on women and women don’t care (until Chad starts giving up, then they’ll care, but that’s unlikely to happen).

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ArtifactFan65 · 2024-04-03T22:52:22+00:00

Both sides are correct

Solondthewookiee · 2024-04-03T14:53:22+00:00

Modern women aren't traditional and they want benefits of being with traditional men.

I don't see this argument being made, especially on TwoXchromosomes. The most common argument is they want someone who genuinely cares about them as a person and is also a functional adult.

Lilrip1998 · 2024-04-03T15:45:54+00:00

Good men aren't unicorns there are plenty of well-adjusted, emotionally intelligent, egalitarian, forward thinking men who are secure enough in their masculinity to take rejection with grace (not doom spiral) and to regard their partners with the same respect they award men. Those guys are the ones getting laid.

As for the rest, I don't think it's so much a "giving up on the other gender" moment. It's more of a

"I'd rather be single than in a one-sided relationship where I have to listen to some emotionally unintelligent dude's condescending remarks about my gender/career/prospects all while behaving like it's my purpose on this earth to be his surrogate sex mommy, maid that also has their own full time career"

I honestly don't think more single people is a bad thing. Being solely dependent on romantic relationships for emotional support is unhealthy. Settling for less than exactly what you want is gonna land you in a worse position than just learning how to love yourself with or without a partner will ever be. Desperation tends to push others away more than it helps anyway.

boom-wham-slam · 2024-04-03T16:36:54+00:00

The issue is female virginity. It's taboo asf to say but it's impossible for dating marketplace to ever be anything other than what it is to one degree or another when there are no female virgins.

Independent-Mail-227 · 2024-04-03T15:50:52+00:00

What I learned is that both sides say the same thing about another side

You're taking what women say as face value, NEVER DO THIS. When you start reading between the lines and learn that women dont see 80% of men as sexual beings you get the real situation where women are talking about no one but the top 20% of men.

wtknight · 2024-04-03T18:10:50+00:00

Women are likely attracted to a smaller percentage of men than men are to women, so I’d say that it’s more likely that women are giving up on men.

SecondEldenLord · 2024-04-03T18:37:05+00:00

If we look at his objectively, modern women are the ones who control the modern day dating. And if they want relationships, literally any woman can get a man, nut not every man can get a woman. If women want just sex I guarantee you that even a subaverage woman can get a different guy every day, if not every week. But a subaverage guy would be lucky to get 1 girl a year. There is such a decrepeancy in the modern day dating, women being delusional and ignoring the bottom 90% of men while men nowadays can't compete anymore because most women want the same top 10% of guys

Princessoflights · 2024-04-05T18:04:51+00:00

The women are correct, the men are largely parroting manosphere bullshit.

Sharp_Engineering379 · 2024-04-03T16:00:58+00:00

Women there say that there are no good men anymore

That isn't what they are saying. Women are wondering why men still expect to be catered to and raised like children instead of acting as competent, self-sufficient adults.

What I learned is that both sides say the same thing about another side

No they don't. Men want to be catered to and raised like children instead of acting as competent, self-sufficient adults.

Title	"Giving up on modern ........."
Author	Senfor69
Upvotes	19
Comments	211
Date	April 3, 2024 2:43 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1buucq6/giving_up_on_modern/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/giving-up-on-modern.1514073 https://theredarchive.com/post/1514073

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