Men: do you empathize with women’s issues?

OXOzymandias · 2020-04-22T15:59:07+00:00

Yup, i have bee raised by women and when i was an anorexic depressed kid, i was basically slowly dying, men in my family didnt land an eye on me, but the women took care of me, i am still in contact with all those women, call them at their birthday, send money when they need some, esp right now lmao and shit ...

Maybe thats why i still suffer sometimes from the Women are wonderful effect (fun fact that my mother who told me that).

And yeah i empathize with women issue....but not those one....

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd? How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested? Or the fact that having male friends is impossible? Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

I empathize with the 2 sexworkers i know who have been abused by johns for no reason what so ever, with some women i know who had their genitals mutiliated younger (dont know the right word), with some women i know who have been raped, some women who have to endured abusive husband because they have been forced to marry or dont want to raise them children without their dad in their life (i know too much women in that case btw, even in the western world) etc etc etc

And yeah being sexless is a bigger problem than what you are talking about ... but less important than the things above for sure ...

RepresentativeSwan1 · 2020-04-22T15:37:45+00:00

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd? How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested? Or the fact that having male friends is impossible? Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

Gender-swap this paragraph and you have described a pretty good life for a man. That's why it's hard for men to empathize with these 'problems'.

The opposite is NOT true for women. Most women would not prefer to have the dating problems of men.

2020-04-22T16:15:12+00:00

I empathize with people on an individual level, not gender specific.

Femcels for example do exist, and I feel bad for them just like the incels; dating is an uphill battle.

I empathize with those that were manipulated and ended up in the fuckzone by having commitment dangled in front of their face and were basically used.

I empathize with those that are in abusive relationships that are for logistical reasons very tough to leave.

I can sympathize with single mothers in which the dude changed at some point after kids were involved (example is an inflated ego from job promotions).

I can’t empathize with the above, if the person clearly should’ve known better. Or if the person is making the same mistakes over and over again. Or someone that is still stuck on a person that they were rejected by months/years ago. If you’re saying men are shit, then you’re looking in the wrong place, at the wrong men. Same goes for men.

Edit:

I agree your OP. As in I can empathize with those issues as long as the woman in question isn’t exacerbating the issues with her actions.

Example: posting selfies on Instagram constantly and ‘being upset’ that they’re being objectified. Unless they lack that much social awareness that someone has to spell it out for them

Troy016 · 2020-04-22T16:16:57+00:00

Yes , I feel bad for them, and wish no bad on them. Any decent human will empathized with someone

petrichordium · 2020-04-22T15:43:31+00:00

Too much. My mother was a really angry and disappointed 1970s proto FDs straight second waver. Yet she married a man with a family history of philandering (my grandfather had his second honeymoon at the Playboy Club), and whenever my dad was “working late” my mother would corral my sister and i together and give long “men are trash” rants while playing joan baez records i shit you not). I have always struggled with accidentally becoming my girlfriend’s gay best friend and then she forgets who i am and we have to break up.

I understand women’s issues more than i want to, and if anything it has taught me to keep myself and my mental priapism away from the women who cannot take it. Because understanding women’s issues doesn’t necessarily change one fucking thing about what YOU actually value in life.

ITworksGuys · 2020-04-22T17:16:42+00:00

Sure. Raised by a single mom and my grandmother, married, have a daughter.

Also "women's issues" have been shouted at me through all forms of media, school, and work since the 90's at least.

I am pretty plugged in.

In my life though I have found women don't know shit about men's issues and don't care to. There is no media blitz, there is no daytime talk shows, there are few champions for the cause out there.

Maybe the last few years they have started to pop up here and there, but the amount of scorn and ridicule women will still heap on you if you dare bring up something like suicide rates, child custody/family court, our healthy boundaries is insane.

"Women have it worse" is a phrase I am so tired of. It's just a lazy excuse to refuse empathy.

Not to mention the ones that heckle you down if you dare propose a woman is behaving badly while spitting out the other side of their mouth that guys need to "man up" and date that 40lb overweight single mom of 3 kids.

Ironically you know who the biggest empathizer I know for men right now? My wife, because of our son.

He is just a teenager but she has seen so much sexism, bullying, and straight up neglect for him in the school systems that she is far more stressed about his life than my daughters.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2020-04-22T16:55:37+00:00

Nope I don't.

MuleFool42 · 2020-04-22T17:29:11+00:00

We all need to care about each other and each others' problems, IMO.

"As a woman, I admit; I couldn’t really care less. And I don’t think it’s unfair that I don’t......."

And when men hear this their reaction is : You not caring = Me not caring.

So walls go up between the sexes and there is resentment and sometimes worse.

So, hooray for you.

the_calibre_cat · 2020-04-22T16:27:26+00:00

And I don’t think it’s unfair that I don’t because honestly: do you care about women’s issues?

Depends on the issue. Some issues I think are unfair and it wounds me to see my fellow human beings suffering through them - other issues I think are nothing more than bitching about life and wanting free shit on a silver platter and I don't support that. I'm pretty big on personal responsibility, if we're equal and I have to deal with my shit and can't kick responsibility over to "society", then guess who else doesn't get to?

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

I guess I have a hard time caring about this one because I don't think it's true. I mean, this reads like... frankly pretty typical demonization of men. That I want to have sex with you or that I think about sex a lot is a matter of my biology, it's not something I choose and it's not something that overrides my rational awareness of your humanity - and it's pretty rich for you to come out arms swinging about this as the first issue you listed right after pointing out how shitty it is that women put men into these little "alpha" and "beta" boxes and are done with it. Like, that is downright impressive lack of self-awareness.

Turns out I'm a human being, and have some days where feeling pretty confident, and other days where I'm feeling pretty self-conscious, but 21st century women don't give a fuuuuuck about that.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

I don't think that's so much a fact, but that one's on men. There are things women could do that would be nice though, like not gushing about how hot other dudes are in our presence would be nice.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

It isn't. I have tons of legit female friends, one of my absolute best friends, one of my do or die besties, is a woman. That I think about having sex with some of them a.) is a function of my biology and b.) is not something that must inherently destroy the friendship and c.) is something I am plenty tactful on.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

This isn't a woman's issue. Commitment is literally the only card men hold, just like you aren't gonna give up your goods for free, the fact that men aren't just gonna easily dole out what they have to offer isn't a "woman's issue". I think feminist literature had actually put it best, paraphrased: You are not entitled to another person's body. Feminists seem to ignore this where labor is concerned, but we don't have to.

Men have dating/sex issues, but women do too. Can you honestly say that you can empathize with women’s?

I am extremely hard-pressed to see what issues women face in dating/sex that doesn't come across like someone didn't peel your grape sufficiently well, or how the Kobe beef steak you got was medium rare instead of rare! It honestly sounds like the biggest "issue" you face is that you might actually have to make some compromises, because a perfect guy isn't going to waltz in and ask you out. A guy will, though, and the fact that it's not the one you want is what it sounds like what you're bitching about.

Meanwhile dudes are over here having to do the monkey dance to try and get a girl that meets some pretty fucking bare minimum standards, like "isn't fat" and "has A personality".

Women face some valid issues, and there are some certainly relationship to sex/dating, but the effort you guys have to put in is analogous to the effort that the capitalist business owner has to put in. You have to look through a stack of resumes to see which worker will be the best one at filling a role that will make you some profits. How difficult that must be, picking who will make you money. The worker has to write that resume, put on that suit for the interview (often two or three times), and basically claim to know everything on the list of employment requirements (they don't) and have tons of relevant experience and no bad incidents in their past.

It would be nice to be about to find intimacy while being allowed to be human, instead of some idealized version of a man, and women supposedly want that and I'm damn communicative and respectful in the bedroom and out - but that doesn't get me intimacy. I've seen guys who are considerably less "respectful" of those boundaries outside the bedroom use that disrespect to get inside the bedroom though - so how can you claim that women are sooooo hurt by being seen/treated like sex objects?

Being forwardly sexual is like, THE strategy for getting into a girls pants. You know how you don't get into her pants? Getting to know her first, being friendly and not forward, etc. Then you're a "nice guy" and you have a whole subreddit dedicated just to you!

Johnnycage456 · 2020-04-22T17:09:03+00:00

I think I did more at one point, though it's slowly eroding. Pretty much precisely because of OP's attitude. I've been met with little empathy, so I return in kind.

I've concluded that it's ultimately a free for all. I'll look out for me. You look out for you. No hate either, it is what it is.

softhandsam · 2020-04-22T15:43:32+00:00

I did, and still would ifwomen here weren't so openly sexist,disgusting and shallow.

They openly say they don't give a fuck about men at all.

So I'll shut that empathy off i think, luckily as a man I'm able to overcome my emotions with thought process.

I saw a woman and her bf (probably) fighting the other day, she was screaming and crying that he had her bag that was full of her stuff and she hated him and wanted it back.

He was just walking away as she screamed and cried and tried to hit him only to be pushed away.

Only a few years ago I would have stepped in, I'm not a small guy 6'1 220, but I just watched and almost smiled.

All I could think of is all the women on this sub who couldn't give a fuck less about men.

NockerJoe · 2020-04-22T15:30:44+00:00

The difference is you can say that shit on twoX and have a hundred men respond with sympathy, easy. You may even make the front page. The reverse very much isn't true.

Jujuj0 · 2020-04-22T16:04:55+00:00

Yes, but I don't really see having "too many options" as a problem. Sure it's a double edge sword and it has some downsides to it, but we all know that you wouldn't give up that power even if you could. It's like crying about being too rich, because you will have to pay a lot of money to the goverment because of the taxes.

One thing I don't empathize with women is about not being able to get the guy to commit. All women want to get commitment from the same type of guy. Confidence is also a double edge sword. The personality traits that makes this kind of guy successful in life, will be also the ones that will make him a shitty husband and make him cheat on you (or not commit at all).

ManguZa · 2020-04-22T15:29:52+00:00

Yes, and most men around me does too. Moreover women ask for this empathy. That's why it's hypocritical that they pull men down instead of empatizing too.

jax006 · 2020-04-22T15:32:36+00:00

Nope.

When I stopped empathizing with women's dating issues was, surely coincidentally, also when I started getting dates and getting laid

wtknight · 2020-04-22T17:21:39+00:00

I actually empathize with most of women’s issues more than I do men’s issues. Many of women’s issues have to do with personal safety. Men’s issues just have to do with sexual inconvenience.

youreextremelyugly · 2020-04-22T15:42:41+00:00

What issues? Too many tinder matches?

beyond_relevant · 2020-04-22T16:40:31+00:00

People really need to study history lest they repeat it.

This entire post sounds like "let them eat cake" as said by Marie Antoinette

Long time ago in a far away land of France, there was a famine and this woman was such a complete bitch to have said:

At length I remembered the last resort of a great princess who, when told that the peasants had no bread, replied: "Then let them eat brioches."
— Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Confessions

Meaning, the people were starving due to not having bread, but she told them to eat cake (meaning go fuck yourselves)

----------------------

You are just like that princess. You are asking men to care for your many troubles, when we are said peasants.

Do you not see how simply wrong it is for women to expect empathy from men when you literally behave as social darwinists.

----------------------

But fundamentally, women are hypocrites.

Women always complain about "muh rights and equality", except for dating where they want "might makes right".

Women are hypocrites because we live in a civilisation.

Long time ago men were in a competition for food, territory and mates.

Then one day, one man said "instead of fighting each other, lets share", and that is how first tribes formed.

Women are hypocrites because they both want the privileges of civilization, its comfort and security, but also the power of anarchy where "might makes right".

Women are a hypocrites because they want freedom for themselves all while ignoring the power they have over men.

"Everything is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power" - Oscar Wilde.

"What difference does it make weather women are rulers, or the rulers being ruled by women" - Aristotle.

"Mens greatest weakness is their facade of strength. Womens greatest strength is their facade of weakness" - Warren Farrell.

xXxINCELFAGGOTxXx · 2020-04-22T16:39:09+00:00

No. To be honest it's not that I don't care only about women. I won't give a shit about anyone but my closest social circle and family.

2020-04-22T16:47:23+00:00

Empathy is empathy. Period.

There's no suck a thing of male empathy towards women, either one is empathic or they are not.

For instance, is this proof that women don't have empty toward dogs?

Everything in life is a case-by-case, generalizing is very dangerous, generalizations like this post further enhance the battle of the sexes, and discourage healthy conversation.

vicistvic · 2020-04-22T17:17:19+00:00

Unchaste people are problematic and run around in circles of misery. They will attempt to empathise with one another, over and over again! Fools!

redditthrowaway1478 · 2020-04-22T20:00:42+00:00

I certainly believe so, yes. Every time I see a question on here that involves women, I ask myself: what would I do? If I had a daughter, what would I hope she choose to do? What should I teach her? Would I be steering her towards my preferred answer or giving her enough info to make a decision for herself? Etc.

I believe our society and culture accepts and embraces the ideas of just how awful male nature can be to women.

I don’t believe our society and culture accepts and embraces the ideas of just how awful female nature can be to men.

Most men don’t disagree that women’s issues exist. Most men just want it to be ACKNOWLEDGED that their issues exist too. Sometimes a woman’s issue is also a mans issue (paying for the first date for example) and that’s where a lot of the friction comes from.

Granted, there is a very noticeable empathy gap in this sub because the men and women here both disgust one another...

Hell, if you don’t believe me, just look at this post from the other day here

Killer_Queen_Daisan · 2020-04-22T21:38:20+00:00

So, you see, women live in a completely different reality. Well, at least pretty girls. In pretty girl land, niceness is expected. In pretty girl land, you’re an asshole because you forget her birthday. This is considered mistreatment for women, hush you male. In pretty girl land, expressing your issues and being vulnerable is just a red flag. I mean, they’re pretty so they wouldn’t understand why somebody has issues and isn’t happy with their dating life.

In pretty girl land, male sexuality is seen as predatory. Miss me with that “women are always seen as sex objects” bullshit. Men are horny. Get over it. If this is an issue, if you think this is evil, go re-examine, idk, your entire life.

As for the rest of your issues, idk girl I have met plenty of girls that hang out with dudes. I have no idea what kind of guys you’re hanging out with but yeah. They get along well as friends. Besides like it’s not life threatening nor is it a hinderance to your productivity that you can’t make guy friends.

To answer your question: all the issues you listed are issues that women caused. You don’t want to be seen as a sex object? Well guess what, that’s because women got rid of purity culture and replaced it with something just as bad. You want guy friends? It’s easy, grow up. I don’t know how you behave around guys, but if you’re like all the other girls that fail with guy friends it’s because: you don’t have an interest to hold the friendship together. Which is a often times attributed to the fact that they are dull and boring. If all else fails, it’s because they were way too entitled.

The issue of entitlement is worth its own paragraph. My sister used to do this very annoying thing. She would just expect me to carry most of the groceries because well, I’m a guy so I’m stronger. She saw no problems with this, and she’s a feminist! See how she justifies her entitlement? It was shit like this that made some of the girls in my life insufferable. And it was because of shit like this that I kicked them the fuck out of my life. Because again, in pretty girl land, this sort of niceness was expected! AND OH YEAH, YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE IF YOU WONT DO THIS! THIS IS THE BEST PART!!!1!!

Oh, and btw, I don’t even give a shit about male issues either. For completely different reasons, of course.

coolerdrop57156 · 2020-04-23T00:10:38+00:00

Everyone is treated as objects. Women are sexual objects, men are success objects. I barely empathise with these 'problems'.

What women fail to understand is that women are treated as a highly valueable objects. Objects that are looked after and kept away from harm. "Oh no, people desire me" your bitching about how people want you. All of your 'problems' are only problems if the man is low value.

Men however are treated as success objects to be used and thrown away.

Another thing is that women are treated way better than men and are able to garner much more empathy, just not from me.

YetAnotherCommenter · 2020-04-23T04:50:17+00:00

do you care about women’s issues?

If we're dealing with legitimate issues (such as, say, access to family planning) then yes. If we're dealing with the complaining of entitled princess middle-to-upper-class overeducated hipster shrews (such as, say, "manspreading") then no.

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

I can't empathize with that since I can't relate to it. That said, men are objectified too, just not primarily sexually.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

That's because men are quite literally desperate for women's kindness and validation and affection. These inconveniences for women are the product of men being starved for kindness. Women, in general, don't proactively give benevolence or kindness towards men, which is why men think "she's kind to me" can only result from sexual attraction.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

How is it impossible? If you want a friendship with no sexual content there are always gay men. They're males too. In addition, unattractive women are perfectly able to be friends with straight men.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

You can't expect people to empathize with what they cannot understand. Personally, I view the fetish for "commitment" as a romanticization of codependence and clingy-ness, but that's me.

Men have dating/sex issues, but women do too.

Sure, that's true.

But women are socially permitted to talk about their issues, to voice their grievances, and to seek redress.

Men who attempt to do the same thing get mocked/shamed/humiliated/bullied/etc.

Can you honestly say that you can empathize with women’s?

How can anyone be expected to empathize with things they cannot relate to/do not experience?

Empathizing is overrated, anyway. Understanding/comprehending is more important than having the right feelings.

abaxeron · 2020-04-23T06:07:13+00:00

from what I’ve seen, one of men’s biggest complaints is that women don’t empathize with their issues. Namely how difficult it is for them to get (and keep) sex and how most of them are placed into the “beta” category instead of the “alpha” category.

This is the most trivial complaint from men; it's just that this particular sub specializes on it.

Men have dating/sex issues, but women do too.

Women's dating/sex issues you listed boil down to: "men want to have sex with me", "men want to have sex with me", "men want to have sex with me", "men are not ready to pay for it with everything they have". Kinda obviously not comparable to "I am at non-trivial risk of dying without ever experiencing anyone willing to touch me".

DerekMorganBAU · 2020-04-23T13:19:46+00:00

DVX2018 · 2020-04-23T14:41:07+00:00

Women problems look like blessings to me, so I'd say no

TomahawkSuppository · 2020-04-23T15:15:51+00:00

I don’t even want women to empathize with men’s issues. I’d just like them to stop whining. Life is tough for everyone except a very small % of people.

darksoldierk · 2020-04-24T02:37:55+00:00

Yeah, I used to. Honestly.

I used to be the guy that would try really hard to not be the trademarked "nice guy", and just be myself. I asked a few of my female friends out, and I got turned down, no matter how hurt I was, I tried to remember that it wasn't fair to her for her to lose a friend that she cared about because of how I feel. When we went to parties, I'd pay attention to what was going on, if a guy consistently followed a female friend and I suspected that she didn't want to talk to him, I'd interrupt and say "hey, lets go get some water" and they would know that that was their "out", if they said "no I'm okay", I'd leave them to continue their conversation with the guy.

I understood it, and yeah, I felt for these women. For the very attractive women who were just so nice, I knew a lot of them. They didn't want to be sluts, but they were just naturally nice to everyone, so men always thought they wanted to sleep with them, I felt bad for the women who got taken advantage of. I remember, I had this one friend, She was so nice. LIke, one of hte nicest people I have ever known, but she was pretty. Like, when she walked into a room, every guy noticed. EVERY. GUY. We were at a party and as this girl walked in, a guy that I never met but was talking to goes like "hey, I'll bet you $50 that I can get in her pants by the end of the night". He spent that whole night chatting her up, and they went upstairs together at some point, when they come back, he looks at me and nods and winks. She cried for a bit after, and yeah, I felt bad.

But, you know, as I grew older, I realized something. Women don't care about men. They don't care about men's problems and men's issues. So, why should I care? Why is it my problem? I have my own issues to deal with, and the fact that others don't care about my issues means that I am the only one who has to focus on them. I'm on my own, I get no help, and I'm not wasting my effort caring about a group of people's issues that couldn't give two shits about my issues.

But, you know what I realized. Things got easier when I stopped caring. When I eventually became that guy that makes the bet instead of the guy she cried to after being used, I was happier. In every single way.

Plutonic_blue · 2020-04-25T20:44:58+00:00

Nope. Because whenever I voice my issues as a man, usually i get responded with "Well women suffer WAYYY worse than you so get over it you bitch"

Or the fact that being emotional around women turns them off. And im not talking like Dumping your whole life story and crying, but just not being a stoic, tough brickwall for once.

So nah, besides, unpopular opinion: Almost all of womens personal problems are due to their actions. Peace

Speaker7 · 2020-04-22T16:15:08+00:00

Sexual gaze. Feminist talking point.

Not at all. You do it to yourself. Last night I went for take away. The woman waiting ahead of me was wearing homemade short shorts. I mean short. They were homemade so she cut them that way on purpose.

Her "top" was a cut off t shirt. Again she made it that way. It was so short that if she raised her arms above her head the shirt would lift up at least to the nipple line.

So if you are going to cut your clothes to show off everything and you go in public... she did that on purpose to show off things but you dont want people to look.

Dont forget feminist in my state just won their lawsuit. It is now legal for women to go toppless here. They want to go topless but dont want people to look.

Grow up.

MirrorThaoss · 2020-04-22T15:33:04+00:00

I couldn't care less, in fact I don't even empathize with or care about men who struggle to have sex or eveb men who have the same problems I do. I empathize with people close to me, that's how empathy works anyway. (But I'm the exception apparently because people say they empathize woth large amount of people here)

The best thing we can do to make up for a lack of empathy is to try to conceptually understand and aknowledge problems, or at least not deny problems because we don't indentify with them.

Joey_Lopez · 2020-04-22T15:42:17+00:00

As a woman, I admit; I couldn’t really care less.

Well thanks for your honesty.

As far as dating is concerned, no I don't really care about women's issues. Most of the problems I hear females complaining about are things they have done to themselves.

I see a lot of people here always talk about females in their early 20's and all the sexual power they have as opposed to the average man. As if they will have that power for long. Most people here don't seem to acknowledge that men may have it harder but we have more time to get it right. We can always start over without our past holding us back. A female screws up 2 or 3 times and she is considered used and after that most men just want her for sex and would never have any intention of ever taking them seriously.

What I encounter are a lot are slightly older chicks and how they messed up their lives by failing to pick the right man. Just the usual single mom issues and ending up single post wall. I see a lot them desperate to try to get back with men that they shitted on in the past. I have 3 ex girlfriends constantly calling me to see if I'm horny enough to see them or desperate enough to get back with them.

I don't have any sympathy because i know that they had their chance to pick a good guy and they messed it up.

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze,

How am I supposed to feel bad about this when females exploit this to their own advantage? I seen females get all kinds of favors, free stuff, and even jobs when they were men that are more qualified.

As for the girls that are not hot enough to get those benefits, they get a chance to see what life is like for a man.

Wallstreet3 · 2020-04-22T15:54:49+00:00

Why should I? And what issues?

2020-04-22T16:21:18+00:00

viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

Which they will nevertheless happily profit from, whether directly or indirectly (feminists indeed recognize the irony of opposing objectification whilst also exploiting it)

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

Which, again, is a tendency women can exploit to their benefit. Maybe they don't do it all the time or until they really need it, but when they really need it, that lifeline is there.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

Got me there.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

It's just the reciprocal of the man thing.

Anyway point of this exercise wasn't to whatabout you to death, but actually to agree with you.

Genders sympathizing with each other is a nonstarter and useless at best because the issues are not only unique but counterdirectional.

It's a zero sum game, a battle, in which you're either at the table or on the menu.

The more value you have, the more powerful you are, the more effectively you can achieve your desires and protect your interests

I think this is something we all realize deep down is true but many secretly wish it wasn't to the extent that they spend their whole life running from it and not even trying to maximize it to their advantage!

vargstrike · 2020-04-22T16:28:47+00:00

No, I don't care about women's issues. Women have feminism and traditional conservatism to advocate for their interests. They don't need nor want me. We men have nothing but our own backbones and collective networking to advocate for our interests. I focus on men's issues, as I am a man. Women can do what they want. However, we men must stick together and utilize our intellect and networking to achieve what is best for us collectively. Female approval is thus worth nothing to us.

HabitsH · 2020-04-22T17:30:04+00:00

No. Women don't empathize with men's issues,so why should I empathize with women's issues? I don't get anything significant out of it other than wasting my resources which could be better spent elsewhere doing other things.

pigofwallstreet · 2020-04-22T19:07:00+00:00

No I don’t empathize, I fact I don’t give a single shit.

I watch the women in my family stay single for years on end, demanding how they need a successful man who also shares their faith. Then they’ll find one of these guys and dump him after 2-3 dates due to a lack of a spark and it will be back to complaining about the guys they’re seeing that don’t want commitment. They’ve shown me their photos and I’ve even met these guys from time to time. Most of the time they are average or slightly above average looking but have everything else going for them. The standards most women have are simply too high for me to feel bad for them.

robot3000_01 · 2020-04-22T19:41:04+00:00

It's hard to empathize for them when they're constantly swimming in abundance for existing

Anthony-waltzs · 2020-04-22T19:44:52+00:00

Short answer, no.

bonusfruit · 2020-04-22T19:59:25+00:00

I used to. Now I am filled with a sort of enduring mutual spite that allows me to maintain the same callousness towards them as they have always had for me. To shed the innate white knight form is most liberating

acenosk · 2020-04-22T15:38:44+00:00

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

No because the benefits of that greatly outweigh the negatives.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

You can.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

You can. Women who can't make friends are just boring.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

You mean top 20% men don't want it.

tl;dr: I can't empathize with women.

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Tealllane · 2020-04-22T16:23:44+00:00

do you care about women’s issues?

To an extent. To be fair I also don't really care about most "men's issues" that are brought up here.

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

I understand how this can be very frustrating. I myself have looked at and talked about women in a sexual manner. However I'd like to believe that in my interactions with women I'm not sexually involved with i am respectful...and I'd like to think that I'm right in that assessment as I have many feminist friends.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

I think this goes both ways, especially with people who are narcissistic, or are generally ignored.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

It's not impossible. Optically as a man with many female friends the women i date think that I have slept with or want to sleep with most/all of them and it causes strain.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

People need to be upfront and honest with what they want in a relationship and be willing to stand by it. If a woman wants a committed relationship and the prospect man wants just sex...she can't give in and needs to move on. On the flipside if a guy just wants sex and the woman he wants to bang wants commitment he needs to leave her alone and find a woman who just wants sex and doesn't want any emotional relationship. By giving into the want of the other party you're setting yourself or the other up for hurt and disappointment.

Men have dating/sex issues, but women do too. Can you honestly say that you can empathize with women’s?

I think I understand.

2020-04-22T18:03:14+00:00

Yes. But not nearly as far as most demand

I can with one part of my brain acknowledge what parts of women’s lives are legitimately worse, while also understanding that the same is for men, and that in America at least neither are bad enough to spend your life crying about

Christian_Kong · 2020-04-22T19:04:52+00:00

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd? How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

To answer this I would say most men have to look at these things from a perspective of them having this happen to them with gay men. Working at (sometimes gay)bars forever this happened all the time to me. It's both annoying and flattering, but I would say more so the latter than the former.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

I think it is possible, but the male friend probably isn't in to you sexually. So if that is a bad thing that is on the woman.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

It's not something most men don't want. It's something the men that most women want; don't want. Even if most every guy has eyes for a lot of women, most realize that they don't have what it takes to be with a lot of women and are happy just having someone who likes them as much as they like that other person. Many are just into relationships.

PierceTheEye · 2020-04-22T19:56:53+00:00

I think both genders have difficulties relating to other gender issues because men and women are fundamentally different down to our brain structure. Being sexually desired by most women to a man is a fantasy for most, but the reason (I think) it's uncomfortable for women because they are physically weaker than men so there's an inherent risk of physical violence and the attention isn't merely "flattering" as it is also "dangerous". Most men will never be truly sexually desired by a woman, which I think is extremely sad.

Personally, I think most people regardless of gender have various issues and empathy is a good place to start. What infuriates me though is that when I see extremely attractive and well off people, especially women, complaining about trivial things. But I don't see either gender having a reason to empathize with each other's issues until both truly empathize with each other's issues. It's a vicious cycle that breeds cynicism and division.

I think a good place to start is to admit that people who are born attractive, regardless of gender, have it way easier in life. So I can understand and sympathize and relate to a woman who hasn't been born with good looks. They are the ones I can relate to. As well as people who are suffering from severe mental health issues like myself, regardless of gender. I think we should focus on things men and women have in common.

12112019 · 2020-04-22T20:13:01+00:00

I don't get the need for women to empathize with men, I think usually it is incels that are annoyed by women laughing at them like they do in inceltears and less about empathy.

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd? How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested? Or the fact that having male friends is impossible? Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

Couldn't care less, the only thing I truly care about with regards to women is their degenerate politics and their penchant to redistribute wealth and to silence people.
And the other thing is dual mating strategies and the cucking of innocent betas, all the rest I really couldn't give a fuck about.

DeepCrimsonPill · 2020-04-22T20:32:31+00:00

I empathize with women's issues because I have a good ability to understand different perspectives. However, I do not sympathize with them because most women will never have sympathy or empathy for men. So the request for empathy for them is entirely parasitic.

Ballface8020 · 2020-04-22T21:06:15+00:00

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

No because women love it as long as Chad is the one doing the objectification. Also, men could never objectify women to nearly the same extent women objectify themselves.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

That would suck. Yeah I empathize with that.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

No it isn't.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

You mean commitment from Chad.

I empathize with women having to deal with fear of male violence, women having to put up with the way over the top misogyny that exists online and women suffering real oppression in many parts of the world but your complaints are basically, "I get too much sexual attention from normie men and Chad won't commit to me."

I think you can handle it.

InfidelCastro11 · 2020-04-22T21:26:58+00:00

Not a single one

Daffan · 2020-04-22T21:56:09+00:00

Most of the issues are self-made or complete bullshit, so not really.

FighterNotAlover77 · 2020-04-22T22:31:08+00:00

I empathize with ugly women because their struggle is close to that of a man. I never feel sorry for pretty women unless violence is being committed against them.

Ecocavalry · 2020-04-22T22:37:57+00:00

I cannot empathize with a gender. There needs to be some backstory. You just listed a bunch of "wants", this is like an incel wanting to empathy for not getting sex. You are not really different from an incel.

veradreer · 2020-04-22T23:45:13+00:00

I can empatise by feeling sorry for them if they can't manage to have sex. Still is not a problem for me to fix. Do I have to give out my body for charity reasons? Hell no. Every individual on this planet has different problems (social, mental health, addictions, money, grief...) it is not a war between genders on who has it easier. We all wake up and try our best.

2020-04-22T23:54:06+00:00

Women and issues ? Like what ?

dylang92 · 2020-04-23T00:49:35+00:00

Yes, of course I do. What I can’t empathize with are the women who say that there aren’t positives.

Scary-Student · 2020-04-23T01:40:02+00:00

Yes I do. I have women in my life that I care about so I sympthasize mostly. But not for all issues - like why does having male friends interest you? idc if i have female friends. Also the commitment stuff I get - but at the same time, fuck no

TechnicalMight0 · 2020-04-23T07:37:19+00:00

Sometimes this sub is so depressing...

Yes, I empathize with women and their problems. Why? Because I'm not a fucking psychopath. Does that mean I cater to their every wish? No, but I can still empathize and be grateful that at least I don't have their problems on top of my own problems.

So often a woman here says "why should I care? I never cared" (at least most of the men here cared at some point, they just got bitter or play the game where they pretend not to care). You don't have to, no, but if you don't you're a shitty human being who has no rights to moralize others on this sub or call yourself "high value", and you're definitely not wife (or even LTR) material.

-observer-_- · 2020-04-23T08:11:05+00:00

While I agree with you I personally try not to say anything about men when they’re specializing women because then I’d be a hypocrite since I’m always specializing men. Honestly I’ll admit when I see a hot guy I think of them as a person second because I don’t care if we have a relationship or friendship because chances are they probably aren’t gay for one and for two I try to stay away from relationships with people since I’m terrible at communication and commitment. Personally I can empathize with some of women’s issues but not most because I’m not a woman so I wouldn’t really know what it’s like but I do help all of my straight guy friends not only talk to girls (the advice usually consists of changing their personality and approach to better find the type of girl and relationship that want) but they can be sensitive around me because hole it’s insulting they think of me as a half girl

richlad · 2020-04-23T11:41:31+00:00

I empathise with women who have got their life ruined by men or women who they've had no fault in. The one ran over by car or the one born in abusive family who sexually and emotionally abused them yes.

I am often empathize with poor women, who are just born in poverty and even when I show them a way out they often tell me "it's easy to say, I am not you". What I see is their experience in life has cut their wings so they can't even dream of flying.

But do I empathize with women shooting above their league comparing men's feature like they are in meat market and commiting on the quality of livestock and its features. That they don't get commitment from the men who already have 5 other women on his speed dial?! No way. Never had, never will.

2020-04-24T01:55:47+00:00

No, why would I?

throwaway9183940 · 2020-04-29T05:43:34+00:00

Not with all the ones you listed but some and I guess some more if you'd list more. The friends one I don't understand as I have a couple female friends and my guys friends do too. The sexualization though I cam empathize with. The one about not being able to be nice to guys also doesn't make that much sense and from a guy's point of view, just because IM nice back doesn't mean I'm interested either. Sometimes women will think that and lower their opinion of you when you're just trying to return the favor.

JesterMcGavin · 2020-05-21T16:43:50+00:00

Nope

diffdedbed · 2020-04-22T15:50:12+00:00

Namely how difficult it is for them to get (and keep) sex and how most of them are placed into the “beta” category instead of the “alpha” category.

Thats not "mens" issues, that some mens issues and I don't care either.

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

No. There is always the burka if it bothers you a lot.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

No its how the game is set up.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

Its very possible if you are not attractive. I personally do fuck my female friends for the most part but I do live an "alternative" lifestyle. Sexual tension out of the way and men and women can be awesome friends.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

This is pretty debatable.

xinf3ct3d · 2020-04-22T16:38:55+00:00

Yes, but not every single one. Sometimes I read about things that deserve nothing but laughter. I honestly find it crazy how many people here hide behind cheap excuses. I don't know about you but I think in the 21st century we should be beyond that "Eye for an Eye" mentality.

CuriousIncel2 · 2020-04-22T16:43:35+00:00

Empathy? No, especially for dating problems. I've never been through that myself.

I do empathize when my highly competent coworker gets a job done and other guys assume that she must've got simps to do it for her, or when a really good gamer is not taken seriously (at first) because it's a girl.

If we're talking sympathy, then yeah I can sympathize with how cautious women need to be especially when alone with a man, even one she thinks she knows well, because of the sheer difference in physical strength, because if shit hits the fan she's helpless.

I realize that statistically men are more likely to get mugged and/ or killed than a woman is raped, but we tend to not think about it, whereas a woman really feels the fear constantly.

2020-04-22T16:46:44+00:00

No, as women either created the very issue or that men have it worse.

mindsanitizer · 2020-04-22T18:09:08+00:00

[deleted]

Barely-moral · 2020-04-22T18:22:27+00:00

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd?

Yes. I can see how that could be a problem. I can also recognize how it is a gigantic oportunity that I would be obligated to exploit if I had it. It is way more of an opportunity than it is an inconvenience.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

Same as above.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible?

I can empathize with this one. This one really sucks. No female friendship can compare with the friendship two men can have.

Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

I can empathize with this one but due to the abundance of options that is available to most women and how easy it is to out compete other women I can't consider that a huge problem.

Men have dating/sex issues, but women do too. Can you honestly say that you can empathize with women’s?

Yes. But I compare the issues women have compared to the advantages and all I can say is that I would gladly switch places with a woman. The advantages are way more and way more impactful than the disadvantages if you bother to use them.

Grand_Duty · 2020-04-22T19:21:08+00:00

Namely how difficult it is for them to get (and keep) sex and how most of them are placed into the “beta” category instead of the “alpha” category.

It does suck when pretty upper class women don't want you for sex, but for attention and money, but none the less, no one is entitled to sex.

As a woman, I admit; I couldn’t really care less. And I don’t think it’s unfair that I don’t because honestly: do you care about women’s issues?

A: Yes. I do! There is not enough Chads to go around and women have to marry hubbies.

Do you empathize with the fact that women are almost always viewed with a sexual gaze, making them feel like sex objects 1st and people 2nd? How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested? Or the fact that having male friends is impossible? Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

A: Yes and No. I understand being stared at like meat sucks, but women do it too really hot guys most the time, and average guys do it to all women, all the the time.

How about the fact that a woman can’t be nice to a man without him thinking she’s interested?

A: Most women being nice is strange because they usually aren't. It's not that they are mean, it's just that they don't really compliment and befriend guys.

Or the fact that having male friends is impossible? Or maybe the fact that what they want the most is commitment but that’s not what most men want most?

A: Not impossible. Girl friends are cool, if they are actually smart and funny, which sadly some women are. I am not friends with dumb women or men.

I want to commitment, but there are too many problems with modern dating. The short story is that guys have to be consistent in everything to get half of what the women gives freely to Chad. And since marriage is not really a big thing anymore and women are free to sleep around, guys (not me personally) feel as though that they need to get yoked and sleep around as well.

Can you honestly say that you can empathize with women’s?

Yes, women get bombarded with attention, which is from uggos and some Chads.

Chads, since they are not required to settle down to get the booty, as the kids call it these days don't have to give commitment to get putang unless she is amazing. This leads to women feeling heartbroken that hot guys only want them for sex and they have to deal with creeps, average guys, and marry hubby, who is not as hot as Chad, but pays the bills and eats her out, as she fantasizing about her glory college days with Chad and his younger cousin Chad-lite.

https://alchetron.com/Studs-(game-show)

But you deal with stalking, harassment, discrimination, and you have to read people faster. As an average guy I don't have to deal with that. By and large, if you have a good head on your shoulder, vet properly, (social media is amazing for the younger generation) pretend to be sick to see if he cares about you, and if he has a good social network, great family relationships, and doesn't p & d women that he will be a good catch.

The problem is women will want this man, since he is highly saught after.

It's like in America, in the African American community where you see hawt black women complain that they are not enough good looking , tall black guy college graduated Black women call them, "Brothers" (I don't get this term, how come I'm not a brother, how do you become a brother. As a Canadian I want to know) Since the guy is a hot commodity, and if is relationship orientated he can pick the best of the best, which makes it difficult for women.

That's why I feel bad for Canadian and American women, they want the best, the best is rare, so they have to settle if they can't get the best. Which sucks for everyone involved poor Hubby is going to lose his boat and ATV in the divorce, and I will kindly take the ATV and the boat off his hands. tee hee

2020-04-22T16:10:19+00:00

Yes i empathize with womens issues and i think 90 % of all men in society are slobs, that do not take care of others and their life and health. Never want to improve themselves etc.

Im disgusted being man sometimes.

Sid_Insidious · 2020-04-23T02:31:37+00:00

I'm a Red Pilled MGTOW. But I do know a few feminists IRL who laugh because they say that despite my highly offensive screed (they call it) I'm technically a feminist. Do I care about women's issues?

Domestic violence? Yes. Rape? Yes.

Catcalling? No. #metoo from a party 30 years ago? No.

Trading sex for a job and then calling it rape? That's not an "issue" it's a profession.

Outright sexual discrimination and harassment? Yes.

Wage gaps, living wages, general socialism, and emotional labor? No.

Women have some specific gender-related challenges, as do men? Yes.

Women are always victims and men are always oppressors because Patriarchy? Hell no.

Do some women get raped, and assaulted? Sadly, yes.

Do we live in a "rape culture"? No.

Do women get objectified? No more than men do. Just in different ways.

Are women in North America Oppressed By The Patriarchy? Absolutely Hell to the No.

Do men objectify women? No. Women objectify themselves sexually. Men objectify themselves financially. Once we are all finished turning ourselves into mere commodities, we then head off into the Mating Arena(tm) and get our Mate Value Number (tm) and try to find looooooove or whatever the fuck people look for in there. Then, we either live Happily Ever After(tm) or just get fucked up and go on Reddit.

Personally, I don't feel sorry for ANYBODY who walks into THAT shit show willingly.

passepar2t · 2020-04-22T15:43:17+00:00

To men and women demanding empathy from the other, I say: go empathize in one hand, shit in the other and see which one fills up first.

rubbooyuri · 2020-04-22T16:16:40+00:00

As men do to their partners and daughters, so shall other men do to their partners and daughters. That’s pretty much the only reason to care; larger, societal behavioral trends.

2020-04-22T22:48:04+00:00

I don’t care about women at all. They are inferior to me in all the capacities I consider important. I try to provide as little support to them as is possible and celebrate when they fail. Their lives are based on lies as they strut around arrogantly in a world completely designed, built and maintained by men. Their position in society is completely illusory, based on the momentary utility of their wombs.

Title	Men: do you empathize with women’s issues?
Author	idkwhatsgoingonreall
Upvotes	20
Comments	254
Date	April 22, 2020 2:11 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/g61sso/men_do_you_empathize_with_womens_issues/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-do-you-empathize-with-womens-issues.655463 https://theredarchive.com/post/655463

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