Some guy sent a voice message to a girl on Hinge about having a sexual encounter with her on the second date. The voice memo was a bit sloppy, but ultimately he didn’t want to pursue anything further unless sex was on the table right from the start. The guy made his intentions very clear: he doesn’t want to pursue anything further unless sex is on the table before continuing.

I’m going to repeat that again. He is not pursuing anything unless sex is given up before continuing further. Listen, I get it—finding someone to take seriously as a woman is tough, especially if you’re interested in a guy and he drops a bombshell like he just wants to plow you and dip. A lot of women have an issue with putting forth sex on the first to even the fifteenth date because they’re afraid of being used and dumped afterward. But the guy relaying his intentions makes it clear for you to just move the hell on. This is a rejection, essentially, and I’ll explain why in a sec.

Women reject overtly while men reject covertly. It’s different because we’re different. A guy being dissatisfied with how a date went might either ghost or initiate something physical with her and then dip afterward. And if this isn’t a rejection outright, then it might end up as one anyway, because he’ll likely just get his fill for as long as he can string you along until you get fed up and leave.

Guys that actually care often don’t just want to shag without a lead-up. Especially with that memo, he was likely confident she’d give it up easily, so he didn’t want his time wasted because he doesn’t find her interesting enough. Yes, this sounds super harsh, but the same thing happens with guys who have money or clout—they get this exact treatment too.

And then we get to the whole conversation about whether or not this is good consent. This is the best consent because it prevents a ton of issues upfront. Where it lacks is in addressing women’s feelings. And if we’re going for upfront consent, women’s feelings are going to have to get tossed out here. But because men have been so burned and beaten down like in a boxing ring, they will show outright apathy toward women’s feelings here.

So basically, if you want a consent culture, here it is in its rawest form. In my opinion, if women don’t want to be burdened by f boys on dating apps, do what men do: shrug your shoulders and just move on. All of this wanting everything to be perfect and exactly how you want it isn’t realistic at all. Take the rejection and move on like us guys do.