Women who engaged in hookup culture, how do you expect a man to ever take you serious?

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2024-12-16T15:01:35+00:00

No new N count posts. Make your post as a comment in the weekly thread if it’s the applicable topic for this week, otherwise wait until next week.

La_Pasion_B · 2024-12-16T03:38:06+00:00

So I just can’t see how any decent man

Are you a decent man?

PracticalControl2179 · 2024-12-16T03:46:13+00:00

Why would you say this to someone on a dating app??

What was your purpose? To shock? To offend? To strike back? To get revenge? To be cruel in the name of “honesty”?

It sounds like you just wanted to fight with her and release some of your anger. You were frustrated that she unmatched you instead of engaging so now you’re on reddit to fight instead.

Plus, if you were mostly looking for casual, then why do you care about her? You could have just said “I see. I am looking for casual sex only at this time.”and left it at that.

Plus do you think some qt pure virgin is going to want to be with a guy who seeks casual sex?

I have an n count of 1. I have repeatedly said here that I think men who even seek casual sex are bad people. I get shat on for it. I doing mean you specifically but in general. As someone who has a low n count and never hooked up, why do you think that low n count t women who have never hooked up will magically be into you? Most of us know to swipe left on someone looking for casual sex and look at them as completely incompatible.

overandunderX · 2024-12-16T01:24:11+00:00

You’re trying to engage in hook up culture. How can you expect any woman to take you seriously? How would you expect any woman to trust you enough to commit to them in order for them to give you children or give you wifey treatment when other women didn’t have to? How could take you seriously enough to risk their youth and fertility on you?

MyLastBestChance · 2024-12-16T01:29:09+00:00

So then can we assume that you will never want a relationship/ wife / family? Since based on your logic you are permanently disqualified from consideration…

farnort · 2024-12-16T01:32:45+00:00

To be honest, majority of the women I knew who engaged in hook up culture were all able to find men to be in relationships with.

I have a girlfriend who has slept with a little over 50 men, she can’t even name half of them, and she just got engaged to a decent looking guy with a good job.

The notion that women who engaged in casual sex will shrivel up and die alone is a bitter male fantasy. Its easy to omit or lie and most people end up eventually settling anyway.

KikiYuyu · 2024-12-16T01:20:45+00:00

Because they like her and they want to be with her?

I think you know that though. I think you just made this post to be shitty to women you think are inferior to you, and you understand exactly why. You can't be so out of touch to not know some people want love and not just sex.

Also, you goddman hypocrite, you're looking for casual. Why aren't you a useless piece of shit for sleeping around?

Novadina · 2024-12-16T01:44:29+00:00

I guess the same way you would expect women to ever take you serious?

Personally I’ve never had any problem with men not understanding that people can have sex when single and dating and also have relationships, because they usually do both those things as well and consider it pretty normal.

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2024-12-16T01:16:10+00:00

lol @ all that talking, no wonder young people are cooked

sublimemongrel · 2024-12-16T01:17:57+00:00

lol ok it’s like the 21st century and plenty if not most attractive guys aren’t going to require some sort of virgin. You can expect men to “take you serious” because they can and keyword here - do.

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2024-12-16T02:15:19+00:00

My husband has no problem taking me seriously. You not being able to take women seriously if they displease your tender sensibilities is a "you" problem.

Oli_love90 · 2024-12-16T08:02:52+00:00

I can’t get over the general logic here. Since a woman has hooked up she should no longer seek a long term loving relationship - she is no longer worthy of that type of love. She can only hope to hookup forever and ever. So then why are you contributing to “tarnishing” a bunch of women forever?

Anonsfavourite · 2024-12-16T01:22:44+00:00

Maybe she'll engage with a man who was also into hookup culture? Idk man y'all are so unserious. My boyfriend's had way more partners and I've only had him and I feel like I didn't think about it this deeply. Life happens.

ConstantCode8637 · 2024-12-16T03:03:56+00:00

This may be hard for you to understand, so sit down.

Look son, if women are out here having sex with men, it's because men are just as promiscuous. So it's quite hypocritical to think that men aren't taking women seriously for something they are happily engaging in with women

I don't think you realize, but a majority of relationships start out thru casual sex, and hookups 🤯

Modest women with sexual discipline aren't out having sex as much so they tend to meet and pair up with men, with the same lifestyle and beliefs

Men who get around tend to meet their gfs and wives by also getting around. The sex was so good, he just had to keep her.

And look at porn stars and strippers, many of those ladies are married to, you guessed it, other porn stars and strippers 👏👏

So just because YOU don't take women seriously who've had sex, other men do not agree 💐

S0yslut · 2024-12-16T04:20:32+00:00

I have never hooked up with anyone and I don’t know how you could expect women to take you seriously for a relationship.

If you even read the studies indicating past sexual history is the number one predictor of infidelity you clearly missed the part that men are not exempt from the consequences of having casual sex. You also become a bad bet yourself for being faithful in a relationship.

Also there is a variety of people in the world who want different things. It shouldn’t take much critical thinking to come to such a simple conclusion.

ThatBitchA · 2024-12-16T01:31:18+00:00

Why would I take a man serious who is more obsessed with my ex or former fuck buddy than present day me?

It's weird.

Casual sex just means that someone has had sex while single.

themfluencer · 2024-12-16T01:18:21+00:00

I reckon we’re allowed to look for different kinds of relationships in our lives just as men are. Like, if a man has had sex with other people in the past casually, nobody questions his ability to pair bond. You ever notice that?

The men I hooked up in the past with didn’t get to hang out with my family all day every day or be the first person to try all my baked goods. My boyfriend now gets to do all that good stuff. The past isn’t super important because we’re here together now and have the rest of our lives to enjoy one another’s company.

Tylikcat · 2024-12-16T01:38:54+00:00

Nothing bad happens to a woman who has sex. Even lots of sex. With different partners.

...except that sexist men who would probably make her life hell over the long term will steer clear. Most of us call that a feature.

fiftypoundpuppy · 2024-12-16T01:26:25+00:00

So I was talking to a woman on a dating app and I mentioned I was mostly looking for casual, then she said she’s already experienced hookup culture and now only wants a real relationship and men who put in effort

Women don't actually talk like this

And it begs the question why y'all were talking to each other to begin with, isn't one of the parts of your dating profile the kind of relationship you're looking for?

I’m curious how you could ever expect a man to put in any extra effort to get sex or even want a relationship with you when you use to just give it away

If all a man wants is sex then why is he looking at women who want relationships in the first place? This is all really confusing, I don't know how you would even get on each other's radars

We DGAF about men's "effort to get sex," there's no logical reason why we'd ever concern ourselves with that. If we want relationships, we're looking for guys who want relationships. Your opinion about our sex lives matters not at all. You are free to rule us out for whatever reason you want, people are usually incompatible with most other people for one reason or another?

You are not all men and all men don't think like you. And trying to speak on behalf of what "decent men" want is a stretch, especially when you display the thinking you do about women:

I'm curious how you could ever expect a man to put in any extra effort to get sex or even want a relationship with you when you use to just give it away

Truly a "decent man" 🙄

If you don't want to date women who've had casual sex, then just fucking don't? But I don't understand why you guys insist on trying to take all women who've ever had casual sex to task due to your own personal preferences and incompatibility. We don't want to date you either, and there's no reason why we'd care about the preferences of incompatible men

You really really wish that you spoke on behalf of all men, but please trust that you absolutely don't. Men - hot men, rich men, sociable men, sexual men - frequently date and partner with women who've engaged in the unthinkable act of having sex outside a relationship. Most men with options do

It's the ones without who are usually asking these questions and seething about the audacity of women who've had casual sex to try to have serious relationships

Flightlessbirbz · 2024-12-16T04:37:03+00:00

By the same logic, why would a woman ever take you seriously?

Most promiscuous women don’t have an issue finding relationships… can’t say I know any who have had that problem. Many of those relationships start with a hookup/casual. They put in effort because they like each other and decide they want more than just sex at some point, since sex is already a given. If anything, it tends to be the women who want to wait until marriage or for commitment who struggle more to find a guy who is willingly to do that.

kalashhhhhhhh · 2024-12-16T07:01:08+00:00

The reason is because when you like someone, you actually want to spend time with them in ways other than having sex. So for example watching a movie with her, taking a walk and getting drunk with her are rewards to you and not obligations. Also, most of the sex happens in relationships and not in hookups.

Suspicious_Glove7365 · 2024-12-16T03:20:24+00:00

Like this: I participated in hookup culture and then looked for a man who would want a relationship with me. Found him. Currently dating him after several years. Does that answer your question?

SocrateandAthena · 2024-12-16T06:14:07+00:00

Very easily. I had several hook ups when I was single. I stopped and never thought about again when I met someone I felt in love with. We're about a decade long together and very happy. Nothing simpler, really !

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2024-12-16T04:40:42+00:00

thank God I didn't have to date foreigners

missmireya · 2024-12-16T01:35:29+00:00

All of the sluts i knew from back in the day are either married, or divorced. The divorced ones still have no problem getting men. Most of those guys aren't what I deem as attractive in the slightest...but hey, they still get men.

ATasteofTx214 · 2024-12-16T01:37:52+00:00

This is a mostly online thing. People with "normal" thought processes don't narrow the person they desire down to their sexual past void of humanity or nuance. Plenty of marriages start as casual then with time, connection, and investment progress to "serious."

rubymood · 2024-12-16T01:25:45+00:00

i personally don’t participate in hookup culture, but i promise you, no grown adult worth a grown woman’s time cares about body count.

i have been with a whooping 2 people at almost 30 years old and i would run from the questions you posed. hell, when i do willingly mention my n count, men get fucking weird.

besides, if you’re looking for something casual, why would someome with a low n count take YOU seriously?

skon7 · 2024-12-16T01:14:25+00:00

Speaking as a woman who never engaged in hookup culture, these types of women have lowered the bar so much that most men expect sex and want it right away. She will find something serious with some guy….. trust me

y2kjanelle · 2024-12-16T06:25:08+00:00

Easy because a man who wants to be serious doesn’t view things that way. Some don’t care about body count or past sexual encounters so they don’t have an issue taking me seriously because they want the relationship with me.

Someone who is looking for a relationship doesn’t think of getting to know someone as “work”. It’s fun, it’s exciting, it’s nice to know that someone is compatible with you, etc etc.

You don’t get it because you have no interest in being serious or marriage anyways. Your interest is having sex with women. So anything other than that irritates you or makes you feel like you dread “effort”. It is not exciting for you to date. It’s not fun for you to get to know someone. You don’t feel a rush seeing something and going “x would like it!”. Women are a means to an end, a means to sex. Anything that slows that down or isn’t centered around sex is a negative for you.

there are men who literally feel the opposite. They like spending time with a woman. They like going out on dates and having fun with a woman. They enjoy the deeper conversations. They want to form a deeper connection.

I met my ex on tinder and we hooked up first date. He was open to a relationship and just really liked me. We were compatible and enjoyed spending time together so….we got together LMFAO. And he just doesn’t care about body count or anything just that we are compatible in the present. Cheating has never been an issue because we feel the same way about it that it’s wrong and things never have to get to that point. He took me seriously because he wanted to. That’s really about it.

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Ppdebatesomental · 2024-12-16T13:14:42+00:00

>I am not looking for a relationship, I don’t want to be married, and see nothing wrong with casual sex. But when women engage in casual sex it makes you not good relationship material.

If this is actually a true story, you could have just told her you aren’t looking for a relationship. Why insult her? If you don’t want a relationship, why care what makes a woman relationship material in your eyes anyway?

This is just rage bait. Woman have their own standards too. Congratulations. No women at all will want you, because despite your belief the double standard is fine, woman have their own standards, and I personally don’t know any women who put up with that nonsense.

Makuta_Servaela · 2024-12-16T02:06:10+00:00

Because I've met plenty of men who are in serious relationships after having done hookup things, know their partner used to, or are still actively doing it (such as in consensual non monogamy or as swingers).

The way people like me (more openly sexual) see it, sex is just as variable as any other activity. Sometimes sex is more emotional and intimate than other times, depending on the context of the specific event and the person you're with. As someone who has had intimate sex with someone I loved, casual sex with someone I loved, and casual sex with casual friends, there is definitely quite a difference between the three. It's way easier to understand the difference when you've had all three, too, and when rather than putting sex on a pedestal, you let each sex event naturally move to its respective pedestal.

If I meet someone who thinks that my previous experiences mean I can't appreciate him, or that he can't "take me seriously", that mostly just comes off as immature to me. I would leave him be, because our difference in experience and perspective would be disinteresting to me, and I know and have seen plenty of potential partners who don't feel that way, so I am not desperate to impress the one guy who values me being inexperienced and the idea of me lacking knowledge.

RoseyButterflies · 2024-12-16T12:40:41+00:00

Sorry but engaging in hookups doesn't make a person worth less.

If you think this you need psychiatric help.

Women who engaged in hookup culture, how do you expect a man to ever take you serious?

Comments

The comment concerns men and women equally ffs!!

So many downvotes and not one reply wtf is this debate sub supposed to be then, c'mon people...

Title	Women who engaged in hookup culture, how do you expect a man to ever take you serious?
Author	just_another_fuckboi
Upvotes	0
Comments	192
Date	December 16, 2024 1:08 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1hf7gt4/women_who_engaged_in_hookup_culture_how_do_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/women-who-engaged-in-hookup-culture-how-do-you.1538610 https://theredarchive.com/post/1538610