How many women would be willing to get marry if child support and alimony did not exist?

2022-04-23T20:40:37+00:00

I want someone financially stable as I’m financially stable. If you’re not frugal then we aren’t compatible.

EulenWatcher · 2022-04-24T04:17:52+00:00

The question you should be asking is how many women would risk having any kids knowing that men wouldn't have any legal responsibility for them. With a good welfare system it could work, but without one it would mean women would bear all responsibilities for their kids.

Alimonies don't exist in a lot of countries or can be used only in a very specific situations, like for a pregnant wife or a disabled partner. Lots of people still marry and I think general trends in marriage are the same. People tend to marry partners from similar background, educational and financial level. It isn't really about women hoping to get alimonies or child supports, it's about probability and keeping one's lifestyle they're used to.

Novadina · 2022-04-23T21:14:29+00:00

I’m married and if we divorced I would probably have to pay alimony, and we don’t have kids. I don’t think the main reason women want to get married has to do with alimony, and child support is not connected to marriage. Do you seriously think women are like “I should marry this guy so I can divorce him in a decade and have a 10% chance of some alimony payments!” They’d have better odds at a casino, and it would be way less work to just get a job.

Everyone should want someone financially stable to marry and merge finances with. It has nothing to do with alimony, it has to do with the whole point of a joint financial partnership. I wouldn’t have married my husband if he wasn’t a stable partner.

2022-04-23T20:49:55+00:00

If there was no child support or alimony I would still get married, sure. I didn’t stop working when I married.

No way would I have a kid though.

sublimemongrel · 2022-04-23T20:38:27+00:00

Child support is not dependent on marriage - it exists regardless of whether the parents are married. I’m in a career where I would never get alimony, it’s a moot point for me. I would not (and did not) put myself in a position where I’d need or would ever be awarded alimony.

Alimony is also rare and not much of a safety net these days for most folks.

2022-04-23T21:06:14+00:00

I wouldn’t have a kid if child support didn’t exist. But I’d happily marry without alimony.

GlowingAsItDazzles · 2022-04-23T20:50:40+00:00

i am married, have no children and my husband would get alimony possibly

briiiana1122 · 2022-04-23T20:31:23+00:00

Only 10% of divorces result in alimony so it’s not the incentive you think it is. As far as child support, you do not need to get married to be granted that.

WestsideMoonWalker · 2022-04-23T20:55:19+00:00

A majority of women do NOT get alimony. Many women might get awarded child support but they never actually GET it.

So lots of women got married got divorced and got neither child support or alimony.

EviessVeralan · 2022-04-24T04:51:38+00:00

The number of women who would want to get married wouldnt decrease that much but the number of women willing to take career sacrifices for the family will.

Academic_Snow_7680 · 2022-04-23T23:22:48+00:00

There would be fewer children.

What you're talking about is a situation where women would be trapped in horrible marriages with abusive guys.

And some guys are such fools they think child support is somehow half of what it takes to raise a child when it is only a fraction of the cost. The very same guys that never put in any work themselves and think that the dedication of raising children should all be done by women for free with themselves getting off scot free.

Alimony is granted in less than 10% of cases and in only some places given specific circumstances where the woman has been made to give up her own career and ability to earn and instead 'employed' as a caretaker for the family, in which case severance and of course half of the assets for more than half of the work (albeit unpaid).

fakingandnotmakingit · 2022-04-23T22:40:32+00:00

I'm married and seeing as I out earn my husband, guess whose going to be the one paying out in the event of a divorce?

Hint: me

SuspiciousRule · 2022-04-24T00:44:45+00:00

With out child support that means a man can have kids with a women a then leave with Out repercussions or having to take care of his child. A lot women don't want to get married because the don't want be a single mom. without child support even less will want to get marry or have kids. Unless you can sue for child abandonment it not a good idea.

LillthOfBabylon · 2022-04-24T00:48:39+00:00

.............I find it so fascinating that so many people here do not believe men should give a shit about the children they create.

januaryphilosopher · 2022-04-23T21:29:16+00:00

Most of them, that's not what marriage is for. But far fewer would be willing to work less hours to look after their children or do other unpaid work for men.

flapperfemmefatale · 2022-04-23T22:15:23+00:00

I got married with a prenup that says no alimony.

Stop dating gold diggers lol

thetruthishere_ · 2022-04-23T23:59:46+00:00

Less than 10% of women would ever get alimony and the average child support payment is just over $400 per month. And that is with marriage or not.

Yet all these women are still getting married...

Most people out there want to be with someone finically stable. Financially stable doesn't mean yo need to make $100k+.

I swear some of you here live on another planet.

RealNiceLady · 2022-04-23T21:16:18+00:00

How many women would be willing to get marry if child support and alimony did not exist?

All of us.

think that there would be far less gold diggers and maybe sugar dating would be less popular

That will always be popular no matter what.

men and women would desire each other equally.

They already desire each other equally.

There would also far less peopke saying that women want finantially stable guys in my opinion

No

maybe more wonen would desire men by their looks like straight men do.

Women already pick men by appearance.

2022-04-23T22:34:35+00:00

Child support doesn’t depend on marital status and I have serious doubts that the dwindling possibility of alimony in a divorce is a legitimate motive to get married for very many women. It certainly wouldn’t make a difference to me.

Fit-Faithlessness149 · 2022-04-23T21:44:26+00:00

If assumed 50/50 custody were the default with no child support I would be fine. Child support would not be calculated based on income disparity but only if one party has the kid full time.

isbostontheworstcity · 2022-04-23T22:51:55+00:00

Do you mean worldwide? Because Albania effectively has neither and a higher rate of marriage.

But it's going to always be an apple to oranges comparison with societal expectations in different countries.

2022-04-23T23:58:54+00:00

I don’t gaf about marriage but it’d be like it is now, I would only have kids if I could support them alone since I can’t trust a man to be consistent.

I have zero interest in “co parenting” w a male bc this is how you think about children.

2022-04-24T02:29:04+00:00

Well, I want to get married, and when I do, the goal would be to not get divorced in the first place and then I wouldn't have to worry about that. I'm a firm believer that 99% of issues in relationships can be worked out with enough effort from both people. The key is to marry someone emotionally mature enough to be willing to work through any issues should they arise.

Blaphrodite · 2022-04-24T11:18:59+00:00

I know many women paying thousands of dollars to men in spousal support and alimony. Guess we should ask them this question.

neetykeeno · 2022-04-24T11:33:29+00:00

In Australia child support is to a formula based upon income, the split of days in care, and how many other kids each parent has to support. Marital status of parents does not affect this. Alimony is exceedingly rare and by legislation for exceptional circumstances only and even then for as short a duration as it can be reasonably paid for...most people here do not personally know someone who has paid or received alimony...they know people who have been involved with child support and property settlements. Because people mostly marry within their social class and age range it is rare that only one party brought all the wealth to the marriage.

Poor people here tend to marry less frequently than well off ones but that's mostly to do with the sheer cost of having a wedding that doesn't get people snickering behind their hands at the cheapness, and the fact poor people who have any spare money at all are usually working their butts off and the time involved in planning all that does not appeal. People happily cohabit and produce kids without marriage.

I'm out of the marketplace altogether having decided men in general are a very bad deal...but if I was ever insane enough to enter the market again, I would be unlikely to choose marriage unless there was a very good and probably also quite unusual reason for it in the specific circumstances. Like maybe we have a reason to travel to a middle eastern or Asian country that is a bit of a backwards shithole and has problems dealing with single men and women sharing a room. In which case....registry office, tell hardly anyone.

zerofeetpersecond · 2022-04-24T14:27:49+00:00

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LouisdeRouvroy · 2022-04-23T20:43:30+00:00

I have my own money, why would I need his?

briiiana1122 · 2022-04-23T20:34:57+00:00

I wouldn’t qualify for either in my current relationship and I didn’t qualify for alimony in my past marriage so apparently I find this acceptable.

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2022-04-23T21:48:43+00:00

The female gold diggers I know are high status with some hefty money and income to their names; they just like other rich men and wouldn't take less.

My best friend is with a rich guy and she has plenty of income from being in (non-sexual) entertainment and using her looks. She's a total gold digger; says she won't pay any cent from her pocket in spite of making plenty of bank. Thinks 100k-500k a year men are broke and uninteresting.

A regular degular average career woman making 100k-200k is not some gold digger. You will have to go wealthy or significant poverty to find a legit gold digger. And still, middle class men are uninteresting. Some frumpy Scientist is not going to impress an actual gold digger unless she is in poverty friend.

2022-04-23T22:08:31+00:00

I’d make a great single mother. If you don’t want to be apart of our or their lives I don’t want your money. As far as alimony I don’t see the point of it unless you were a stay at home wife/mother, and that was a choice you too made together. If we/you were both working then you can go depend on yourself.

bunnybuttncorgi · 2022-04-24T03:31:57+00:00

I grew up in a third world country, alimony doesn’t exist and child support is optional. None of what you think would happen, actually happens. They’d desire financial stability even more.

Miserable_Yam4778 · 2022-04-24T06:41:00+00:00

I own assests I would not risk to marriage, full stop. A husband in this economy? No thank you.

2022-04-24T10:34:14+00:00

How often do women get alimony? Not where I live, you are lucky if he pays child support on a monthly basis

WolfBroder · 2022-04-24T12:37:47+00:00

When you say no child support do you mean that when it’s joint custody? Because that makes total sense, why should the father be paying money when he’s already footing half the bill

The woman should also not get money if she fought for sole or majority custody. If that’s what you want you can pay your way then

The only time child support should be awarded should be if the father doesn’t want to be a father at all, or has been deemed grossly unsuitable

callmejohny · 2022-04-24T13:28:50+00:00

Willing? About the same as right now? Why I think that? Can't fight human nature. As if anyone really uses these things as a hard stop for their decisions.

bluestjuice · 2022-04-24T15:28:29+00:00

Alimony wouldn’t factor into my decision making whatsoever unless I was planning to marry someone in a dramatically higher or lower income bracket and we had an intention to have the lower-income of us stop work to handle the household long-term. Basically it’s a scenario that is unlikely to apply to me so I’m not concerned with it.

I would be very unwilling to have children with the expectation that if we split, my partner would no longer share their financial upkeep.

Goth_Lizard · 2022-04-24T18:10:28+00:00

Idk I don’t want to have kids or get married

AZNDevil · 2022-04-25T19:19:22+00:00

I would say if anything, they're going to be MORE selective on who they sleep with, date with, and try to marry with in the first place. They're also going to be more committed to the guy and put more eggs in the basket and not take ANY chances of losing out the guy they're trying to get with.

2022-04-24T03:15:28+00:00

Most places in the US don’t have alimony, and it’s only right to support your children, asshole. If you don’t plan on taking care of your kids put your dick away.

Hrquestiob · 2022-04-24T03:33:15+00:00

Feel free to disagree with me, but I highly doubt the vast majority of people who get married go into it thinking about how much money they could make off of the other one if they divorced.

2022-04-23T22:08:45+00:00

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sublimemongrel · 2022-04-23T22:17:47+00:00

So much gaslighting from the women in this post

2022-04-23T20:52:34+00:00

jumps around waving hands like a lemur spazing out

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Cupcakelover1985 · 2022-04-23T21:33:57+00:00

I’d still be willing to get married under those circumstances and the no child support thing would reaffirm my beliefs on no kids until marriage.

ruboyuri · 2022-04-23T23:28:13+00:00

Child support no, alimony yes for me

Willow-girl · 2022-04-24T05:16:46+00:00

I have been married four times but never wanted children, so no need for child support. Never sought alimony from any of my ex-husbands. I don't even know anyone who has ever been awarded alimony!

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2022-04-24T05:39:57+00:00

As someone who married has children then divorced child support etc was never something that made any difference to my choices.

Apocalypstik · 2022-04-24T05:58:55+00:00

Child support and alimony played no factor in my choice to get married. We aren’t having a child—maybe it should have since I make more money though. Hmm

slightlynefarious · 2022-04-24T10:03:20+00:00

Taking this as a good faith argument, if I recall correctly, alimony and child support began because of property laws and gendered working laws disadvantaging one partner over the other in terms of financial stability and leaving the women (vast majority of the time) in the lurch with future worke* ahem, children, at a massive loss. Does this hypothetical control for the the inequalities in other financial areas as well to offset that? (Financial stability in this case meaning economic and professional discrimination, health status and coverage, loss of income due to pregnancy from said child's birth leading to the need for child support, "pink tax", as well as a host of other things.)

Edit: this is also not to discount the difference now in which financial philosophy may be very different between partners as well.

zerofeetpersecond · 2022-04-24T16:18:14+00:00

Child support not existing would be good for everyone, would would actually have to choose men who want to be good humans beings rather than fucking who they think it’s hot because daddy government will enforce good behavior at taxpayer’s expense. Everyone women recreational fuck deadbeats everyone’s tax dollars are waisted at the law enforcement and family court level.

Wander1900 · 2022-04-24T16:30:43+00:00

Why is that? Beginner here.

Kizka · 2022-04-24T18:47:29+00:00

Well, what about those countries where those things don't exist? Are women in those countries still getting married and have kids? Yes? There's your answer.

freespirit1963TJ · 2022-04-24T23:00:30+00:00

For the bulk of people, in most ordinary situations, child support is the only thing that carries any clout. Unless you're in a situation where some dude has made big bucks and the wife has stayed home raising kids, alimony isn't that common. A factor in many states is the wife's ability to earn a living. So now, a judge may grant a wife alimony for four or five years to obtain an education and put herself in a better position to survive. I make more money than my wife does, always have. The things they take into consideration are age, level of education, the ability to sustain themself etc. My wife has a bachelor's degree, I have a very small amount of college, all things being as they are, she'd never get alimony.

GloomyHousing2657 · 2022-04-25T02:34:43+00:00

I literally know no women who has gotten alimony who is divorced. I’m confused where these women are?

2022-04-25T15:49:18+00:00

I want to get married because it’s the best institution to raise kids. I don’t care about alimony or child support as I don’t intend to be divorced

AngryNurse2020 · 2022-04-27T10:17:28+00:00

No alimony, sure. Just don’t ever ask me to quit my job to be a homemaker/SAHM

No child support? No, because first of all child support belongs to the CHILD, not the mother. Any parent, male or female, who refuses to support their child is dirt. Why would I get with dirt?

Flightlessbirbz · 2022-04-28T02:13:16+00:00

I would consider marriage still, but I would not have children and would never be a housewife. Child support exists (with or without marriage) to make sure kids are taken care of in the event of a divorce or breakup, and alimony exists to compensate for lost wages due to being a homemaker. Without those things, having kids and/or quitting your job are too risky.

2022-04-29T17:45:52+00:00

Then I wouldn’t get married, I want to be a stay at home parent for the early parts of my kids lives and child support/ alimony are basic fail safes. They don’t make sense when both parents work and earn similar but if you’re stay at home they’re super important

Fine_Measurement7968 · 2022-04-30T15:08:19+00:00

Instead of child support, they can set up a trust fund with a legal attorney. The money in the trust fund can only be used only for the sole benefit of the child with proof of receipts. Custody should be 50/50… 2 weeks with mom, 2 weeks with dad!

Title	How many women would be willing to get marry if child support and alimony did not exist?
Author	SabrineYasmine
Upvotes	74
Comments	298
Date	April 23, 2022 8:29 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/uae3wf/how_many_women_would_be_willing_to_get_marry_if/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-many-women-would-be-willing-to-get-marry-if.1111432 https://theredarchive.com/post/1111432

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