Should sex toys be permitted in a relationship

Loud_Definition6669 · 2023-05-08T01:24:04+00:00

I wouldn't feel "replaced" by a sex doll, I would be freaked the fuck out.

megapuffz · 2023-05-08T01:19:12+00:00

A lot of people who are having good sex and have healthy sex lives employ the use of sex toys so I don't really know what you're getting at.

Barneysparky · 2023-05-08T01:14:42+00:00

Didn't you post this yesterday? It was not misunderstood.

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2023-05-08T01:24:04+00:00

didn't you just post this, 80% of the responses explained that womens husbands and bfs introduced them

63daddy · 2023-05-08T03:59:57+00:00

I dated a woman who had a very hard time reaching orgasm due to some medications she was on. Sex toys helped greatly. They sure made my job easier, so I’m all for them.

MxMaster9907 · 2023-05-08T01:14:25+00:00

How is this even a question bruh 💀

The only correct answer is yes, they should be “permitted”

eefr · 2023-05-08T02:03:52+00:00

My husband did buy a tubular device with a ribbed silicone inside that produced suction, heat, and vibrations… I liked watching his face and body while I was using it on him, because his pleasure is hot. I know that none of my body parts do all of that at once, but he still enjoys having a ex with me without toys, too. Toys just add variety, is all.

I draw the line at anything that has a face

sweetestpineapple · 2023-05-08T04:04:03+00:00

Within reason, yeah. There’s a difference between cock rings and vibrators and actual sex dolls. I just don’t want any uncanny valley vibes.

eefr · 2023-05-08T02:02:10+00:00

Yes to sex toys, squinty eyes at the word "permitted," because I do not need anyone's permission to own objects, and neither does my partner.

If my partner really wanted to get a sex doll, I would think it's weird / kind of creepy, but at the end of the day, he can masturbate however he likes.

Should a sex toy been viewed as a sexual aid or a sexual threat within a relationship?

We beat this to death in your last post. I don't know why you're asking it again.

Frankly, in my view, it's pretty pathetic to feel threatened by an inanimate object.

DRW0813 · 2023-05-08T01:31:14+00:00

would you feel like you weren't enough for your partner

My penis doesn't vibrate on her clit. Technology has only cum so far. But jokes aside, sex toys are awesome. 1) Sex in a long term relationship needs some spice. And if after years of marriage, taking on debt, living life together, you fee threatened by toy, then its your own insecurities. 2) many women need a lot of clitoral stimulation to cum. 3) many women want to "rub a quick one out" same way men do. Scheduling sex can be tricky.

SoulBadguy0408 · 2023-05-08T02:47:23+00:00

Sex toys are just meant to make things easier and are not a replacement for actual sex, so I don't really see the issue

FeatherWorld · 2023-05-08T05:32:13+00:00

It's not a matter of being permitted. Everyone has their own agency. I wouldn't be jealous, I have my own sex toys and people should know what they like and experiment on their own. They should be in tune with their own bodies and sometimes sex can be a big effort and you want something quick. As long as our sex life doesn't suffer in any way, I'm cool with it.

TotalTravesty · 2023-05-08T01:25:45+00:00

Only thing that “should be permitted” in a relationship is what the people in the actual relationship agree to.

For me personally, I’m not going to put clamps on my girl’s horniness and I expect the same treatment from her. If she wants to play with toys while I’m gone or even with my help, whatever. Don’t go through my web history and we’ll be fine.

There is, however, such a thing as “doing too much.” Bringing a whole lifesized doll in the mix is a little outside the realm of normal sex toys. But you know what, whatever. You do what you gotta do to get off monogamously. I just need to trust that I’m not with one of those girls who forgets that a tool is a tool and falls in love with her sex toy because that’s a bigger can of worms than just the toy.

houstongradengineer · 2023-05-08T01:26:10+00:00

Personally I would be OK with some types of toys if I had a frequent, healthy, passionate sex life. I'm not gonna tell other people what to be OK with, though, unless I have a damn good reason. Maybe sex dolls and sounding rods could be argued against, for example. Strokers and vibrators are literally fine if used responsibly, in my experience, and I don't even approve of porn generally.

KayRay1994 · 2023-05-08T01:33:21+00:00

depends on the individual couple and what they agree on - there is no “right” or “wrong” here, but i do think it is wrong to tell your partner to not use toys when y’all aren’t messing around, that’s the only limit i’d really draw in terms of what is and isn’t permitted - that being said, in terms of doing shit together, entirety depends on what y’all are both comfortable with

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2023-05-08T02:11:54+00:00

Yes. What a stupid question.

MistyMaisel · 2023-05-08T02:25:19+00:00

Whatever both people agree to is the correct answer here. Me personally, I've never used one and have no big plans to. If my fella wanted to try um, I'd give it a shot.

I don't ask questions about his porn or how he gets off other than that I've confirmed he's not really into sick shit which is all I need to be comfortable.

If he brought home a full on sex robot, that would qualify to me as sick shit and I'd be booking it out.

Miserable_Yam4778 · 2023-05-08T02:37:26+00:00

I mean I personally find the sex doll thing a little creepy, like fucking a lifeless corpse, but whatever floats your boat.

Unless a sex toy is having a negative impact on your intimacy, why would you care?

StrongLineage · 2023-05-08T02:51:15+00:00

Name does not check out

totallyworkinghere · 2023-05-08T04:03:49+00:00

If my partner brought home a full sex robot I'd mostly be concerned where he got the money for it

just_a_place · 2023-05-08T04:53:05+00:00

If there is ever even a question of "permission" to use sex toys in any relationship my advice is to ditch that person, NOW!

Unless of course the other person is your sex toy. Know' I'm sayin? Where instead of "permission" you instead use a "safe word." 😉

Mine is Pineapple. 🙂

Novadina · 2023-05-08T08:25:45+00:00

Of course they should be “permitted”, you don’t rule over your spouse and control their whole body. We don’t even have any “permissions” in my relationship at all, we are both adults.

Say you’re a married or dating man or woman and you’re regularly sexually actively with your partner but your partner suddenly tells you that they want to buy a sex toy. Would you feel like you weren’t enough for your partner or would you feel like you were just being adventurous?

When we were early dating, my partner and I went to a sex shop and picked out toys. A+, would recommend. No, I didn’t feel like I “wasn’t enough” (enough what?), I felt happy the guy I was dating was turning out to be so great in bed and loved we had so much fun together. We continued to do that and still enjoy getting new toys together or getting them as gifts to each other.

If a woman’s husband brought home a fully customized RealDoll with a vagina tailored to perfection and the perfect anal pocket and a realistic suction device in the mouth the simulates oral sex, would you feel replaced or disrespected?

No, I wouldn’t feel replaced, wtf? But I’d be pretty surprised at that, they seem kind of creepy to me, like a dead body, I think he isn’t into them either. He has bought some pretty wild sex toys, though, but usually ones more for me (he would much rather watch me use a toy to get off than have a real doll, but he probably just has different kinks than you, everyone is different). I’ve bought him plenty myself, including things that simulate vaginas or oral.

Should a sex toy been viewed as a sexual aid or a sexual threat within a relationship?

How would it be a threat? We just view them as toys. Remember playing as a kid? You could play just with your imagination, or you could play with toys. Toys weren’t a threat to playtime, it’s just something different and fun.

I really want us to have this debate because my sex toy questions previously were misunderstood.

Will you actually respond to anything this time? You didn’t answer any of my questions last time.

downward_spiral9494 · 2023-05-08T16:51:43+00:00

Idk why you aren't banned yet. You post this thread constantly, and you go around to every other thread replying to every single comment talking about this. Are you jealous of sex toys or something?

Also for anyone wondering, this guy is completely unhinged. I told him I'm a femboy and he went on an hour long meltdown replying to all of my comments with stuff like

Lol kool-aid lipped concha 😂

go take more hormones Dylan

Sorry daddy touched you and made you act like a little girl

I guess your daddy didn’t raise you to be a man

Then later went and commented somewhere else that femboys are harrassing him and he's a big victim.

Seriously look through his post history, nothing this guy says is in any good faith

ElectricCollars · 2023-05-08T01:30:26+00:00

A dildo or vibrator is different than a guy using an entire doll that takes every function a woman could give, and they're pretty rare to have.

Most people have sex toys with a one-two function toy, and yes, they should be allowed, and imo encouraged to have the best sex possible with your partner. If my bf wanted a cock ring or a cuffs that help him keep a hold of me better I would say cool let's try. But would I be weirded out if he got a Kardashian Barbie 2000 edition with limited features? Yes...

Ppdebatesomental · 2023-05-08T02:10:55+00:00

This again? Get one of these for your butt, thank us all later.

https://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/anal-sex-toys/prostate-toys/sp-eupho-syn-trident-109586.aspx

TheRedPillRipper · 2023-05-08T02:19:44+00:00

Would you feel like you weren’t enough

No. Good sex is fundamental to a healthy relationship, but it’s only one aspect. The other 23 hours and 59 minutes of the day? Is where we ‘fill our cups.’

Godspeed and good luck!

ashpr0ulx · 2023-05-08T02:52:00+00:00

i’m not a big fan of sex toys myself, but if it helps things when you’re together in the bedroom, cool.

if it’s for use when partner is not around or available, cool.

if it’s replacing sexual needs for your partner, not cool.

neetykeeno · 2023-05-08T16:40:21+00:00

The real doll is getting put in the garden shed as soon as he lets it get stanky...I'm fine for washing ordinary scale sex toys for both of us but I draw the line at anything I have to bathe like an elderly person with dementia

No-Rough-7390 · 2023-05-08T02:29:08+00:00

Sure, but they are by no means necessary at all.

New_Relative_8709 · 2023-05-08T03:37:14+00:00

…why not?

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2023-05-08T02:59:54+00:00

In my opinion NO, it says alot about a couple's sex life if they constantly need to use toys but to each their own

januaryphilosopher · 2023-05-08T10:38:06+00:00

This is like asking whether oral sex or masturbation or something should be allowed in a relationship. Like sure, a couple could go without it, and some people may not like it, but most find it enhances the experience and there's no real drawbacks so there's not really a point in banning it. Note I'm talking about "normal" toys (dildos, vibrators, strokers, suckers, prostate massagers, etc) as something like a doll is both fetish gear which is going to take extra negotiation as it may cause some discomfort (you're meant to pretend it's a person and you're paying a lot of extra money to pretend it is, which naturally may weird people out) and expensive (lower end is £1000-£2000) which may raise questions about your financial responsibility. If I brought home an expensive sex doll or puppy play kit or whip or something I'd expect to be met with discomfort. My fiancé and I have several toys between us and they are just helps. They allow us to enchance masturbation when the other one wouldn't be around anyway, feel nice things with each other we couldn't otherwise feel (I simply don't have the body parts to do the things dildos or rope let me do) or just to provide another way to get off if our bodies are having an off day. I know I'm enough, but I don't see a reason to deny better or just different things (also we travel pretty often and it's not a problem if I can't be enough when I'm on a different side of the Irish Sea).

Silverk42-2 · 2023-05-08T01:43:10+00:00

Sex toys should be permitted as long as both people in the relationship consent.

Ok_Tomorrow_3963 · 2023-05-08T03:06:19+00:00

they should, but the man should have full control over them otherwise I'd view it the same as cheating

fight me

WilliamWyattD · 2023-05-08T04:25:07+00:00

In an ideal world, no. We would be better off in general if cultural norms pushed against sex toy usage in general.

But in the world we are in you context is king. It depends on the situation. There are costs, however.

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dowehavetoreally · 2023-05-08T06:30:17+00:00

Are you writing relationship legislation? Because permitted kind of sounds... very metooey.

How about people just do what turns them on.

I think guys see an arse-anal (grin) of toys used in porn and think "Hey that made me pretty hard. I should amass a suitcase full of jiggly jelly toys!"

Most women probably don't like competition sized dildos, or anything too large being pushed in down below.

But I've never gotten a bad review from proper implementation of a clit stimulator.

Here's an idea. Talk about sex. If you're into toys and hope she is too, ask her if she has any toys, or is interested in trying toys. Maybe take her to a sex shop on the "wrong side of town" where you both wear really large garish sunglasses and raincoats. Make a date of it.

Really. Do not take any of this advice, or listen to anything I say. Ever.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have batteries to change.

Anxious-Tailor-7182 · 2023-05-08T08:30:10+00:00

Who is going to enforce such permits?

dolltron69 · 2023-05-08T10:06:45+00:00

I don't understand the use of the word 'permitted' that's a terrible way to form dialogue just to start.

Are you muslim? because as far as i am aware only muslims consider the toys as haram in most cases (dolls are highly forbidden and illegal in most non western countries)

edit: fun fact i have a doll page on facebook and most of the visitors are indian and muslim men , go figure.

SillyMushroomTip · 2023-05-08T11:13:33+00:00

Anyone that has threats about sex toys for bedroom fun has some issues from the past to resolve.

abaxeron · 2023-05-08T12:25:46+00:00

Last time I checked, I was not required anyone's permission to buy and use legal products by myself. Considering a sex toy as a form of cheating lies on the same plane of insanity as thinking the same of a vibrating toothbrush.

blueshinx · 2023-05-08T14:25:07+00:00

Sex toys are fine, if they resemble humans too much they give off uncanny valley vibes lol.

Masturbating by yourself is a non-issue for most relationships. I always wonder, do men who seriously dislike it when their female partner uses sex toys also dislike her using her fingers?

loke2dabrain · 2023-05-08T14:47:03+00:00

They should be permitted but for both partners not just the woman

LingonberryGood3915 · 2023-05-08T16:52:05+00:00

its degenerate and disrespectful. sexual excitement should not be important at all. only being willing to please matters, beyond that sex should not have any importance.

Safinated · 2023-05-08T17:16:34+00:00

Yes, why shouldn’t they be?

chikiinugget · 2023-05-08T17:32:09+00:00

Some men enjoy vibrators. Some men enjoy sex toys. Some men hate sex toys. Some women enjoy sex toys. Some women hate sex toys. Literally who gives a shit about what people do in the bedroom wtf I’m actually baffled as to why this is a post

Popular_Accountant60 · 2023-05-08T22:56:53+00:00

Yes? I’m married with a great sex life and sex toys add ✨pizzazz✨

Sex toys can never replace actual human touch/ affection so I’ve never seen them as a threat and neither has my husband.

I much prefer my husband over a sex toy Because at the end of the day a sex toy can’t tell me what a good girl I’ve been 🥰

Hoopy223 · 2023-05-08T23:01:53+00:00

Ummm

Thats up to you and yours.

Free country and all that.

I_DRINK_ANARCHY · 2023-05-09T02:29:50+00:00

The idea of being permitted or not to own sex toys is absolutely foreign to me. I've bought them while I was single, I've bought them while in relationships, I've bought them after getting married. My husband doesn't own any sex toys for himself that I know of, nor has he expressed any interest in buying them. If he WAS interested, I'd hope it would be something we could go pick out together, because I'd find that kind of hot. We've randomly used some of my vibrators together but for the most part we're quite happy with just each other.

Now, if he wanted to buy a sex doll, that would be a much bigger conversation than say a Fleshlight or something (though, to be clear, any type of normal toy doesn't need a conversation at all). Regular toys are fairly small and inexpensive and very non-human. They simulate a part, or a feeling. A sex doll simulates a whole person, is going to be extremely expensive, and will have to be...stored somewhere. I wouldn't tell him no, but we do make a habit of discussing large purchases with one another, and a high end sex doll would probably fall under that category.

I view sex toys as multi-faceted. I like mine for quickies, and also because I travel for work a lot. I'm away from home for a week at a time, often week after week. It's nice to be able to vibe one out right before bed. I've used them with my previous partner way more than with my husband, but that was because my ex was way more into it. I have friends who use their toys with each other regularly. I don't know anyone personally who has anything like a sex doll or a Sybian, but I'd guess most people who do own them don't go bragging about them.

If toys are being used as replacements for sex with your partner, and one or both of the people involved are unhappy about that, then the toys are probably a symptom, not the problem. It's the same as anything, like porn or even just masturbating. They're pretty normal and aren't an issue - until they are. If that happens, then that couple has to find a way to honestly talk to each other about what they need, what they want, and why they're hurting/feeling rejected/not having sex with each other. Both people would have to be open, vulnerable, willing to admit fault, and capable of articulating what they've been hurt by. That level of honesty and vulnerability is hard for most of us, even when achieving it can mean healing and future happiness.

Flightlessbirbz · 2023-05-09T02:53:40+00:00

Sex toys (such as vibrators) are often used together by couples, and solo they’re really not that different from any type of masturbation, which most people don’t just quit doing in a relationship. You can’t expect that both people will always be available and in the mood for sex when the other is.

To me, a man using something like a fleshlight or a woman using a dildo or vibe is no different than just masturbation. I’d have an issue with a sex doll because they’re creepy as hell. No way am I sleeping in the same place with a plastic corpse thing that you fuck. Imagine opening a closet and a lifeless, dead-eyed naked body falls out… nope nope nope.lol

notmyrealnamepapi · 2023-05-10T10:59:20+00:00

Read his comments on his profile. He sounds so scary 😨 This man does not like women

Title	Should sex toys be permitted in a relationship
Author	MrHustleTopG
Upvotes	0
Comments	79
Date	May 8, 2023 1:12 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/13b979a/should_sex_toys_be_permitted_in_a_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/should-sex-toys-be-permitted-in-a-relationship.1218654 https://theredarchive.com/post/1218654

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