Porn is not the problem

PMmeareasontolive · 2024-05-31T20:16:40+00:00

I disagree to some degree. Habituation to that kind of stimulation.. makes one habituated to that kind of stimulation. It's classical conditioning: stimulus=orgasm. Take away the stimulus and there may be problems achieving the orgasm w/o it.

One main function of porn is getting one out of one's own head. Porn viewers aren't worried about "am I doing it right? Do I look ok? Is she bored? Does she think this is gross?" etc.

Something that takes away all those pressures AND delivers the stimulus that it does is a pretty powerful drug in and of itself.

63daddy · 2024-05-31T18:34:48+00:00

Porn may in some cases be a contributing factor, (studies are mixed) but it’s certainly not THE factor or even one of the top factors. If one looks at the scientific and medical literature one will see the main factors are things like being overweight, smoking, blood pressure issues, aging, medications, metabolic syndrome, depression, sleep apnea, etc.

Those who claim pornography is the primary cause are arguing based on an agenda, not what the scientific/medical evidence says.

https://samhealth.org/news/understand-10-causes-of-erectile-dysfunction/#:~:text=Obstructive%20sleep%20apnea.,treatment%20for%20their%20sleep%20apnea.

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/10035-erectile-dysfunction

https://www.urologyhealth.org/urology-a-z/e/erectile-dysfunction-(ed)

toasterchild · 2024-05-31T18:09:26+00:00

I'd say, its not always the problem but there are definitely times when it is. Most people don't have porn addictions but for people who do it can really fuck them up. I had a friend who had a serious porn addiction and it's fucked up every one of his relationships which sucks because he's a good guy.

Cat_Lover259 · 2024-06-01T01:03:56+00:00

I’m horny all the fucking time and my bf knows this yet he still chooses to jerk off to porn than have sex with me—so no, there is no lack of intimacy on my end resulting in him doing this.

TheDuellist100 · 2024-05-31T18:42:17+00:00

When it takes less effort and energy, mentally and physically, to just get off to porn instead of going out into the real world to meet someone, porn is the problem. The convenience and comfort of it is a sickness.

Sex is a lot of work, it takes a lot of energy, it can feel vulnerable, among plenty of emotions that can make it daunting on both sides. Why go through that trouble, when you can get off in the safety and privacy of your own room? People will usually take the easier option if its there, and in this case that's porn.

If you condition yourself to that convenience of porn, real physical sex is going to look and feel like a chore, directly leading you to performance problems.

Porn enables the weak willed to be even weaker willed.

superlurkage · 2024-05-31T18:21:31+00:00

It’s generally not, but the truth is not palatable to either gender, which is why it’s blamed

bokan · 2024-06-01T01:44:36+00:00

Also, there’s like a billion chemicals in everything that mess with testosterone levels. Not to mention the microplastics problem: https://academic.oup.com/toxsci/advance-article-abstract/doi/10.1093/toxsci/kfae060/7673133?redirectedFrom=fulltext&login=false

This is one of those things that I think will be seen in the future like smoking, lead hats or asbestos construction.

Or maybe not, maybe things will get slightly worse and worse forever.

guppyhunter7777 · 2024-05-31T18:47:09+00:00

At least on the male side of this equation, porn and by extension all sex work only exists because of the divide between what men want and what your average female is willing to accommodate. A small percentage of women decided to profit on this. That is the way it is always been. That is why it is commonly said that the easiest solution to porn completely within the hands of women. Sleep with your guy more or talk other women into stop making OF content or except it.

his_purple_majesty · 2024-05-31T19:30:45+00:00

I think it is a problem.

The only thing that I think is overblown is the claim that it shapes sexuality, sexual preferences, and ideas about sex. I mean, maybe it does, but if a guy is that dumb to have his entire sexuality shaped by porn then maybe you're better off without him, porn or no porn.

serpensmercurialis · 2024-05-31T21:10:25+00:00

I think the “addiction” and ED aspects of porn are overstated, but in general its impacts on socio-sexual development are understated. If you’re exposed to thousands of images and videos of women being hurt and abused sexually before you’re 18, then that is going to impact the way you see sexuality and impact the types of sexuality that you think are normal enough to not warrant something like a discussion beforehand.

A lot of people are willing to admit the mental impact the occasional Disney movie or other media had on their development of romantic ideals and the way they see the opposite sex, but the second you mention that the violent and degrading porn they’re looking at every single day for years may have an impact on their views, then suddenly media affects nothing.

This goes hand in hand with the people who think that sex is some other dimension where the acts they engage in say nothing about who they are outside of sex. “Oh it’s fine that I want to hit my partner and verbally abuse them because it’s sex! It’s not real!” As if their desire isn’t a reflection of who they are instead of a reflection of this unreal dimension supposedly created during sex.

Flightlessbirbz · 2024-05-31T20:03:48+00:00

The major issue here is acting as if the man didn’t habitually watch porn before getting into the relationship and is just using it as a secondary option because she won’t have sex with him. But most guys these days have been watching porn since they were in middle school long before they ever got a girlfriend, and it has shaped their entire sexuality.

This means he learned how to have sex from porn, which does not at all translate into what women actually enjoy in the bedroom. This can lead to women not wanting to have sex as much because it’s uncomfortable or not pleasurable or he’s pestering for things he saw in porn that she doesn’t want to do. But men who are desensitized by porn often aren’t aroused by mutually pleasurable, non-performative sex with the same woman. So it creates an environment where neither person is satisfied with their sex life.

I’m not saying other things like antidepressants and external stressors don’t cause sexual problems too, and I would also add obesity in there. But I don’t think we can just ignore porn either.

Zabadoodude · 2024-05-31T20:13:23+00:00

I agree that overuse of porn in a relationship is usually a symptom of larger issues, not the cause. He's not unattracted to his wife because he watches porn. He's watching porn instead of having sex with his wife because he's not attracted to her and checked out of the relationship. As you pointed out, the correlation between ED and porn use is weak. What's more, there's a negative correlation with moderate porn use. Meaning men that watch porn only occasionally are less likely to have ED than those that don't watch it at all. Moderate porn use is also associated with more positive attitudes towards women than no porn use at all. Something the anti porn advocates forget to mention despite it usually being shown in the same studies that show extreme porn use being correlated with Erectile dysfunction, and warped views of women and sexuality.

I think the bigger negative effect that porn has is it makes men complacent in finding sexual fulfillment with real women. Having the pipes backed up can be the motivation a man needs to go out and take risks to attract women. As it is, many choose to stay in and masturbate. It's easier in the short term but leads to less long term life satisfaction, as the emotional need for sexual intimacy is never fully met.

qunamax · 2024-05-31T19:50:31+00:00

Regarding relationships: If my sexual desires are not met I will revert to porn, for a while, then I will end the relationship. I know what I want in sex and how I want it, if we are not on the same page we should start looking elsewhere, sex has to be perfect, nothing else in a relationship can substitute that, end of discussion.

I don't think any man reverts to porn if his sexual desires are completely met.

HolidayInvestigator9 · 2024-05-31T20:14:31+00:00

I think porn is a problem for gen z, and this is coming from a millenial who watched porn since I was a teenager. they are definitely taking it to another level, theres gen z virgins that have a full list of specific demented kinks and fetishes , I dont know how it happened but some gen z men have full on porn brain rot. Like dont get me wrong porn is great, but Ive seen gen z take it to another level thats pretty bizarre. porn is good for a wank now and again but some gen z is constantly consuming it. like having it on in the backround not even jerking it. weird ass shit like that

Prettmongouse · 2024-05-31T19:35:20+00:00

Porn is the reason a lot of men can’t get properly hard and have a bunch of deviant fetishes. Even ones damaging to their own self esteem.

Lots of guys come into their first sexual experience already having PIED symptoms and they haven’t even had sex yet so it’s not about “losing interest” in your partner.

Men are very protect over their porn. They tend to lash out online whenever someone suggests maybe not watching it

pekomstoptier · 2024-06-01T10:01:01+00:00

I've always felt that addiction is a symptom of a larger problem. instead of banning what addicts are drawn to, why not try to figure out why they feel drawn to it in the first place?

porn addiction is not the root of the issue, it's just an unhealthy way to cope. we need to be asking why it happens, not how we're supposed stop it. that's where we can actually make progress.

Purple_Kangaroo8549 · 2024-06-02T23:43:55+00:00

Nobody prefers masturbation over prime pussy.

2024-05-31T18:52:02+00:00

Porn rarely gets chosen OVER sex with your partner, unless she's ugly as fuck, then the problem is uglynes.

But porn causes far more problems than just sexlessness in relationships.

It changes how you view sex, relationships, love, and woman.

Especially if you are viewing it from a very young age.

harmonica2 · 2024-05-31T19:05:42+00:00

I would say laying off porn fixed ED for me but that's me.

Gari_305 · 2024-05-31T18:21:06+00:00

From the abstract of the Journal of Sex Research

While perceived addiction and religiosity have been key contextual factors in understanding the link between pornography use and personal distress, these contextual factors have been explored less in the relational literature. Using a large nonprobability convenience sample from the United States, a moderated mediation model of the association between pornography use alone and two key indicators of relationship quality (relationship satisfaction and relationship stability) was explored. Results suggested that both general and aggressive pornography use alone were associated with less relationship satisfaction and relationship stability even when accounting for a range of potentially confounding variables. Perceived addiction partially mediated these associations, while both religiosity and gender moderated them. Generally, higher religiosity and being male were linked to compounding negative associations between pornography use and lower relationship quality. Findings suggest the importance of considering both religiosity and perceived addiction as important contextual factors when studying associations between pornography use and both relational and individual outcomes.

Basically Porn fucks up relationships u/noafrochamplusamurai

Sir_Spectacular · 2024-05-31T18:18:28+00:00

Agree on the first point, disagree on the second.

I don't know any men who would prefer masturbating to porn over having sex with a real partner, even if she had a less attractive body than the average porn star. If a man is taking matters into his own hands it's almost certainly because he's not getting what he needs from his partner to feel sexually fulfilled.

For the second point, "normal" use of porn doesn't usually cause boner issues but when taken to excess, it absolitely can. Porn addiction is a real thing and it can cause all sorts of sexual problems as a symptom.

ChadderUppercut · 2024-05-31T19:32:23+00:00

I'm a bodybuilder. I watch videos about bodybuilding and posing videos and what not. Why is my watching those videos not causing me to get lazy and why have not I quit bodybuilding? That's because it does not work that way and neither does porn.

Watching videos of bodybuilding does not "satisfy" me and make me "complacent". It's just one way of exploring and getting motivation for more bodybuilding. The same as porn is a way of exploring your sexuality.

pg_throwaway · 2024-05-31T18:17:08+00:00

It's an unhealthy behavior that damages relationships the more it's indulged in. It's not the boogeyman of relationships, but it's one of the things that can contribute to ruining or making them worse.

Porn can be a major problem for relationships. Porn is definitely a cause of erectile dysfunction due to "simulation overload", where real life women don't turn you on as much as porn. It also undermines a major motivator for self-improvement in men, which is to get in a relationship.

When I was younger and consumed more porn, it definitely hurt my ability to enjoy sex as much, wasted a lot of my time, undermined my motivation to do more productive things, and polluted my thinking. I now rarely watch porn, and my life has improved quite a bit because of it.

KGmagic52 · 2024-05-31T18:26:11+00:00

Blaming porn is the way to always keep the blame on the man, no matter what the woman is or isn't doing. If a woman can blame porn rather than look internally, she will.

meteorness123 · 2024-05-31T18:57:15+00:00

Untreated childhood trauma is the root cause of relationship problems.

Porn just like any addiction is a cause of untreated trauma.

John-Nada_ · 2024-05-31T20:16:25+00:00

The physical attraction isn’t there anymore, hint, she got fat, but you can’t tell a girl that she got fat because, a womans core identity go build up by men who hit on ther and told her everything she wanted to hear. And friends other women obviously told her love at any size.

Ppdebatesomental · 2024-06-01T01:39:48+00:00

It’s almost impossible for me to think there’s not a possibility for addiction. First of all, some people seem completely addicted to their screens for social media,

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/social-media-addiction

And for gaming

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/23124-video-game-addiction

Things that induce actual physical, sensory pleasure have been manipulated to be a pleasurable as absolutely possible like fast food and processed food

https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2013/02/26/172969363/how-the-food-industry-manipulates-taste-buds-with-salt-sugar-fat

Cigarettes additives to increase addiction

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2040350/

Given how addictive screens can be in general, and how physical pleasure can be manipulated to become addictive, if the porn industry hasn’t actually figured out how to make their product addictive, they are behind in the game. If TikTok can figure out the winning algorithm to make it as addictive as possible with stupid dances and kittens, it pretty hard to think their aren’t people falling into spending hours in a pornhub rabbit hole

I hear the “agenda” argument all the time. I have absolutely no more interest in banning porn than in banning chicken McNuggets. I do think people need to be warned and aware of their behavior if their porn use starts to be excessive or compulsive

ArmariumEspata · 2024-05-31T18:31:15+00:00

Many men become emotionally attached to the women in porn, which makes it harder for them to quit, and which leads to sexual performance problems because they transfer the emotional attachment that they’re supposed to have towards their wife/girlfriend towards porn actors instead

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succubuswhore304 · 2024-06-01T03:16:44+00:00

Porn is the solution not the problem

Over_Noise3530 · 2024-06-01T04:06:27+00:00

Porn is a big threat to women. My ex choked me because I wouldn't send him nude pictures. That's how addicted to porn he is.

And the majority of the guys on dating apps ask me for nude photos and never want to meet up for an actual date, wasting my time and making another hurdle I have to jump to get a relationship

ExternalBarracuda292 · 2024-06-01T07:34:31+00:00

I feel like it's sort of obvious that porn is not the cause of ED or PE, since these things have been extremely common since long before porn became as widely available as it is now.

I would also particularly like to applaud the statement at the end of the OP about how failure to perform in men often has psychological or physiological causes that are rarely understood these days.

Endgame2648 · 2024-06-01T19:20:22+00:00

Ofcourse it is. How do you expect that your partner will satisfy when there's a million 10/10 women on your screen getting fucked in the position you want for the duration you want. You can also just move on to the next woman in a second if you think her areolas are not big enough or her ass is a little ugly. You can't change your partner. You guys need to read the book "your brain on porn"

Salt_Alternative_86 · 2024-06-03T14:17:25+00:00

Yeah, pretty much... Was sold over the counter for decades, basic rite of passage for boys to get an old copy somehow, but suddenly things aren't working and nobody's willing to address the elephant in the room, so find a scapegoat so we can play pretend and act like we're doing something.

Sharp_Engineering379 · 2024-05-31T18:06:50+00:00

Nah, not it. Boys train their dicks to respond to ever-increasingly depraved porn and have no concept that most of the women depicted are not sexually aroused, and they assume that women should respond that way.

Metalloid_Space · 2024-05-31T18:06:57+00:00

Yeah, it's not just porn. It's never just the addiction.

That doesn't mean the addiction can't negatively impact your relationship though.

januaryphilosopher · 2024-05-31T18:52:12+00:00

Just because there can be other causes to problems doesn't mean porn doesn't cause any problems.

RevolutionaryJob7908 · 2024-05-31T22:44:44+00:00

If I was a woman trying to convince the public to ban porn so I can starve men of immediate gratification and have to work for me and my attention then I would replace the reasons here I want porn banned with more convincing ones.

We know. We get it.

To my opinion however, in a relationship it doesn't make sense for porn. The desire goes away. So I'll hear stories about those still watching porn with a gf... Etc and then I don't understand it.

Otherwise I veiw a ban on porn as a power grab. ATM it helps ensure I stay protected from settling with anyone I don't want (prevents me from being desperate) and that's a good thing.

Ladies should work out and look good, give me something worth it. Go European style, etc.

If they want to be approached in person the better solution is ban dating apps nationwide. At least I 'think' that would work out for everyone. That will motivate men more in the direction they want. Right?

2024-06-01T07:56:38+00:00

That's because they no longer have emotional,and physical intimacy with you. Porn didn't create that, porn came into the scenario as a way to deal with the lack of intimacy in a relationship that's in its walking dead phase.

The only way to deal with a lack of intimacy is to communicate the issue and tackle it head on, opposed to running to porn.

Yes. Porn is a part of the prob, and was most likely in tne mans life before the relationship problems. The man is using it as an excuse to not take accountability for how he feels with his woman. How can the issue ever get addressed if he's not coming forward about his emotions?

You saying this is the equivalent of a woman choosing to go have sex with another man only because she feels a lack of intimacy with her man, then her turning around and saying her cheating isn't the problem

Title	Porn is not the problem
Author	noafrochamplusamurai
Upvotes	41
Comments	294
Date	May 31, 2024 5:58 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1d51v4s/porn_is_not_the_problem/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/porn-is-not-the-problem.1520164 https://theredarchive.com/post/1520164

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