I’ve noticed something that doesn’t get talked about enough in my opinion which is how patient many men are with physically aggressive women. I’m not even just talking about extreme cases of domestic abuse but also the smaller, constant things that people brush off as “play fighting”.

If you flip the gender roles, everyone knows what that behaviour would be called. But when it’s a woman hitting, slapping, shoving, or throwing things at a man, people laugh it off. The man is expected to tolerate it because “he’s stronger,” or because “she doesn’t really mean it.” That mindset is incredibly toxic, because it quietly tells men that their boundaries don’t matter, and that their pain doesn’t count unless they bleed.

A lot of guys will rationalise it because they don’t want to come across as controlling or “overreacting.” But that patience often ends up being used against them. Once someone realises they can cross that line without consequence, they will and by the time the man finally says, “enough,” people act like he’s the problem for not tolerating it anymore.

The broader culture has made it too easy for women to hide behind the excuse of the “strength difference.” The logic goes: “He’s stronger, so it can’t hurt him,” or “She couldn’t really harm him anyway.” None only is that bullshit but physical aggression isn’t just about injury but about respect. It’s about whether your partner recognises that your body, like theirs, deserves basic safety and care.

Men need to start drawing the line earlier. If someone hits you, slaps you, or “play fights” in a way that makes you uncomfortable that’s not playful, that’s disrespectful. You’re not less of a man for refusing to tolerate it. You’re just someone with self-respect.

We talk all the time about how women should leave at the first red flag. Men need to start doing the same.