We see this debated here fairly often, mainly when a woman has something bad happen to her by a guy it’s her fault for not vetting him properly. Yet at the same time, we hear guys complaining of woman’s high standards, so it’s a no win situation.

In certain jobs, let’s say one where you have to work with children, you are vetted. They check your history,your credit, any records you have, sometimes check the closest people around you too but this doesn’t stop pedos being able to abuse children. We see it in the news all the time for both men and woman. Do we blame the system for not having crystal balls?

Predators, particularly clever ones, are very good at knowing what to say/do/act and how to hide until they have their victim trapped, why do we still blame the victim for not somehow knowing he/she was a predator?

And more importantly, why is it different for men and woman? Why is a man always the victim but the woman should have vetted better? Why are single mothers hated when they’re only single because the dad abandoned them?

Sure if a potential partner you know has cheated on all their previous partners, don’t be surprised when they cheat on you. But how are you supposed to know a ltp is going to cheat?

There seems to be an ideology here that if a woman just properly vetted a guy when she first meets him, she’ll never have any problems, and if he leaves her or cheats on her, it’s her fault. But guys aren’t supposed to be mind-readers so if he gets left or cheated on, he’s always the victim