So if 85% of us are sleeping with 10% of the men, then how come we don’t see lines of women waiting outside the doors of these men?

xFallacyx69 · 2021-10-20T21:01:40+00:00

Honestly when I was being my sluttiest self, I wasn’t bringing all the women to my house. I had sex with 5 chicks over the course of 3 days in one instance and none of them knew about each other. If you were a pump and dump, it was probably giving me head in a parking lot. If you were a ONS, it was probably at your place or in the car (I know, I’m as classy as the women I fuck). If you were a FWB it was probably flip a coin to see where we’re gonna do it (my place or yours).

Blowing me in an abandoned room at a party or in my car out of sight doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. But likely none of those women ever told their future BFs how easy they made it for me…

John_Oakman · 2021-10-20T21:15:46+00:00

Because it's trivially easy to not notice a lot of things unless one specifically looks for those things. For most people sexual activities takes place in relatively private settings, therefor out of sight and out of mind for those not partaking in said activities.

This also applies to many other activities, such as alcoholism, prescription dug abuse, white collar crime, etc. There's not that much visible or overt signs, so it doesn't get noticed except perhaps in the abstract/statistical.

Expensive-Guitar3609 · 2021-10-21T01:13:20+00:00

I've slept with like somewhat 60-70 women (not counting escorts) so Idk if I qualify as a "Chad" but I'll bite anyways...

I didn't sleep with most of these girls more than once or twice. Some of them were just ONS, some of them were FWB or girls I just dated briefly, for a few weeks or a couple months.

I dated a bisexual girl (who now is a good friend of mine) who I used to have a few FMF threesomes with, she had lots of girl friends, some bi, other just curious.

I traveled around and got laid a lot, specially in central America where my race is "exotic". I got in two LTRs there and slept with other women simultaneously (both girls knew about this, so I did not cheated).

So, it's not like women are waiting outside my door while I nut inside a girl hahaha. They are just "around".

They came home, had sex with me, we went out, kind of dated, then they cut loses to give another guy a try, they asked the guy for some time away, they came back and had sex with me again, went back to the guy and then broke up and again back to me. That's how it works.

(Yeah I've broken more relationships than I would like to admit)

Thing is you don't need to hide what you are doing, because when you are sleeping around it supposed you are not in a long term monogamous relationship right?

"The talk" about exclusivity rarely happens, because you don't give the girl enough time to bring it on, or just because the girl knows the moment she asks for exclusivity you are out of the door because you have other women on the side, so most women try to play it cool and see if they can "win you over" so they kind of string themselves along until they get tired and bail (can happen a month in, or six months, or a year or two).

So most women knew I was dating other women. I asume some of them dated around too.

And yes, it's not like 10/90 rule but I know my experience doesn't correlate with 90% of men. I have a wide social circle of male friends from all ages and for most of them the only way to have sex is concentrate all their time, resources and money to just one woman and commit to her. This is not my case.

lifeofbrittany · 2021-10-20T21:11:42+00:00

as someone whos ex boyfriend was roommates with "top 10% men" in university, they had new girls coming over for sex daily, sometimes twice a day, made me pretty uncomfortable.

Lots of girls know about it, I just dunno if everyone knows the extent. Theres guys who have reputations for having slept with hundreds if not thousands of girls.

this is a very confusing post.

I think you might just be out of the loop.

GuitarsBack · 2021-10-20T20:29:54+00:00

Why aren’t these men bragging about having a massive harem of thousands of women?

Who says they don't? Many of them do.

Many of them don't because they know that Chads with a reputation of being discreet about their hook-ups are a prefered choice of many women.

calfshrug · 2021-10-20T20:21:53+00:00

That’s just not a realistic expectation. Look- gay men in the most preliminary studies from the 1980s HIV/AIDS epidemiology research were reporting mean average N-counts in the 500 range. You don’t see all of this happening because you’re not in those environments when people are hooking up, but that doesn’t mean they don’t do it

YoMamaz_azz · 2021-10-20T21:07:37+00:00

Its top 20% with the 80%, all it takes for that to be true is for each of them on average to have 4 women. Thats not hard. If you have sex with only 1 new woman a week thats 52 women a year. Even once a month is 12.

The most true pareto principle example is probably, "of all casual sex being had by men, 20% of men are involved in 80% of the encounters"

Chunka23 · 2021-10-20T21:34:41+00:00

Because chad and Tyrone don’t fuck fuck all the girls at the same time. There’s something called a rotation, they’ll have 2+ women and rotate them throughout he entire month/week.

E.G Tyrone is “dating” 3 different girls and is talking to another 5. Those 3 girls will come to his house twice a week or he’ll go to theirs. This will last only a few months before the girl realizes they are getting played, then they may leave or stick it out hoping they change which they never do. Once one girl leaves he’ll pick up another to fill her spot. In between girls he may have flings with random girls he’s talking to, most of them don’t stick because they realize Tyrone isn’t serious and they shouldn’t have had sex with him. So they cut contact.

In the end 80% of those girls fucked the same 15% of guys at least once. That’s all it means

Source: I know a lot of Chads and Tyrone seen chats, pictures and videos to prove what they do on the daily.

Im_The_Daiquiri_Man · 2021-10-20T20:28:24+00:00

Is this a serious question?

Because the guy’s that are fucking hundreds of women and the women who share them aren’t having parades about it, it’s not true?

This shows how disconnected some people are from the world of casual sex.

Like, okay, bookworm you and your friends in your crochet class don’t engage in or admit to engaging in promiscuous sex.

Suddenly that means it doesn’t exist?

rivetcitymayor · 2021-10-20T21:45:50+00:00

I think it’s more like 40% of men are having sex with 60-70% of women

purplish_possum · 2021-10-21T01:51:19+00:00

The general understanding is that the top 20% of guys are getting 80% of the sex. This doesn't mean these guys are racking up four-digit n-counts. A single hot guy may sleep with eight women per year, while an ordinary guy sleeps with two, and an ugly guy none.

dlee25093 · 2021-10-20T20:55:25+00:00

Doesn’t mean you’re dating the same 15 percent of men- your expectations are of the top 15 percent of men. The number of fat woman who think they’re entitled to above average looking men plays to this point. Woman think because a higher value man fucks them that they want them. Woman have trouble facing the harsh reality their looks dictate a lot of their value to men.

OneAngryBlutbad · 2021-10-20T21:18:07+00:00

sits back and casually munches popcorn

This is gonna get good later 😂

hopeidontforget2021 · 2021-10-21T06:33:50+00:00

Because it's not the same guy?

If it's 20% of men getting 80% of women then that's just having a rotation of 4 girls for every 1 guy. Considering most social circles aren't perfectly overlapping this is pretty reasonable.

And considering the sex drive difference between men and women, it's pretty natural that a woman that's not involved in the guy's life wouldn't really notice..

fakingandnotmakingit · 2021-10-20T21:28:18+00:00

it's not that 85% is sleeping with 10% and I think the principle has been overblown and crapped over by the bitter part of red pill.

supposedly the top 20% of men get 80% of available sex (not necessarily 80% of women).

Assuming a sample of 10 women and 10 men in 1 year time frame. Let's say they're in university so alcohol, hormones and available sex: - of the women, 2 dont have sex outside of long term relationships (no. 1- 2) - 5 have sex in terms of longterm or short term ( for example will have sex on the third date pretty easily). (3-7) - 2 will have sex both casually and in relationships (8-9) - 1 is just partying around having sex all the time. (10)

The top 1 man is casual. He has sex with 10. He's also met woman 8 and 9 in clubs. Several times. He's also sometimes is trying to find a gf to hangout with. While doing this he's met women 5, 6 and 7. 5 fizzles out before the third date. 6 and 7 makes it to the third date and sex happens. It doesn't work out.

1 man has now managed to sleep with women 6 - 10. And a lot of the time it's women 8 - 10 that make up his numbers.

2 man is a lot less casual than top one. He meets women 2- 8 in various dating apps/social circles. Of women 2-8, 2 doesn't work out because he wanted sex quicker than she did, 6, 7 and 8 aren't personality matches and he doesn't date them past date one. 3 - 5 make it to date 3. He ends up sticking it out with woman number 4.

He has sex with women 3, 4,5 and 8. Albeit in a different setting than top 1 and maybe less times than top one until he and 4 get together. He and 4 now have regular sex (which still counts as available sex btw)

So 2 men have essential had access to sex the most. Both in availability and in body count. In this scenario I'll give them a nice 80% to include both regular relationship sex and casual sex.

3 man manages to hook up woman 8 casually, dates women 3 and 5 and gets to third date with 3. He also meets woman 2, ended up waiting for her and they get together

3 man sleeps with women 3, 8, 2. Regularly with 2 but only once or twice each with 3 and 8.

4 man got together with 1 super early on somehow. This takes them both out of the market. Body count 1 but available sex a lot.

5 man struggles with getting to third date/hook up sex. He gets woman 3 and 4 (before 4 settled down) on date 3. His total count is 2 both in women and available sex.

(3-5 men together get 15% of available sex)

Men 6 - 8 struggle with (casual/ third date sex) increasing difficulty as you go down. Long term is still on the table but both 1 and 2 are out of the market now. So they have to struggle a bit more to hopefully get whoever available between women 3 - 9 to third date. While the body count is can be 1 its also not very high frequency. So maybe these guys have sex once all year.

Together that have 5%

Bottom 2 (9 - 10 )gets so little luck/ charisma/ looks that they end up with a body count of 0. That 0% of available sex.

SonicBackScratcher · 2021-10-20T21:56:15+00:00

There are far far far fewer women online looking for easy hookups than men.

As such what the guys online are looking at is the party girl subset and how they are not able to play in that, and the guys who are, do get laid pretty much whenever they want.

And the other 85+ % of the population doesn't play these games.

Kentucky_Supreme · 2021-10-21T01:11:46+00:00

The lines are digital (texts and DMs).

There's tons of women on social media complaining that "all men cheat, men ain't shit, men don't have feelings, etc." Probably because they got pumped and dumped or keep getting strung along without commitment. They're all chasing Chad and Tyrone while completely ignoring all of the other "below average" men that are trying to talk to them.

ledatherockband · 2021-10-21T04:23:37+00:00

Good scheduling. Not even kidding.

angels-fan · 2021-10-21T15:06:59+00:00

If you've never seen a girl lose her fucking mind over a top 10% guy, it's a spectacle to witness.

There are literally zero standards necessary to fuck him. Girls go full on primal.

calfshrug · 2021-10-20T20:26:17+00:00

I’d say that on average, the people from the redpill communities you’re discussing are saying that women have about an N of 20-30, on average, by their 20s. That, even though it’s generously high, is only a couple partners per year from 10th grade onward.

Longshot_56 · 2021-10-20T22:07:03+00:00

Because this phenomenon isn't all that widespread in real life.

Polygynous environments absolutely do exist in Western culture but they're confined mainly to universities and large population centers with an active nightlife (and even then the majority of the population doesn't participate).

The problem is men tend to, shall I say, "reform" their perceptions about the dating and sexual marketplace in environments where polygyny is most likely to occur, so this tends to dominate and drive their perceptions of heterosexual relations into some unhealthy places.

For example, when an 18yo guy moves out of his parents house to go to college or spends a lot of his time on OLD where the only girls he is likely to see are shallow 18-22 yo ~~women~~ girls who don't know what they want and aren't really interested in commitment anyway. So its really not all that surprising when college girls tend to fall into casual sex/FWB/situationships where looks are far more important. That 18-20 age range for men can also be especially difficult because most 18-20 women are hooking up/dating up in age and you can't get into bars here in the US until you're 21.

The problem is that once a man has constructed a new narrative of the world after being convinced his old one was wrong, it can be very hard to convince him that his new narrative is still very flawed.

Orange_Paisley · 2021-10-21T03:21:47+00:00

They ignore the ones that are quietly at home living their lives with one partner.

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-10-20T20:45:17+00:00

If only 5% of guys were screwing 85% of women, limited only by time and the ability to generate an erection, wouldn't that leave millions of women unsatisfied and basically having sex only once a month or so? How is that a better sexy life than the average guy?

bottomLobster · 2021-10-20T20:48:28+00:00

You can only ask this question if you don't know how modern dating is for average men. Create men's profile on OLD and you'll see.

sandbarsunday · 2021-10-20T21:26:59+00:00

As with many things, those who benefit have learned to keep their mouth shut about it.

michael1962-01 · 2021-10-21T08:10:48+00:00

Actually as born in a different time I can tell you that a 3 digit n is nothing special to a chased male. "Disco" was Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. There was rarely a week where you did not have action with one of the girls. Noone went there to "dance". When you went windsurfing or deltagliding you rarely spent a evening alone.

I was some time 'together' with a sport champion athletic girl in the 80s who was in the countries finals. She was very promiscuous and had fun at each event.

Even girls with rings are more than wild if they are away from home. Even blunt and open.

So there is far more going on than you see in front of your social curtain.

A Harem would mean that you have to take care for many. A collection of plates and fwbs is far better.

But a Ltr with a young fertile beauty trumps that.

Hrdbldbbsndrkchclt · 2021-10-21T10:10:58+00:00

You know we have mobile phones now? And the ability to schedule

Playful_Art_5364 · 2021-10-21T17:23:11+00:00

I know dudes in college that slept with every girl in a house. Half the chicks in college I was to talk to knew another.

If you got to my Insta and you go my female followers all of them I’ve flirted or dated with at one point and many are mutual friends with another.

So I find this stat to be true.

Fit-Photograph1646 · 2021-10-22T19:07:14+00:00

Lol so naive. In college I was sleeping with a new girl basically every weekend. My roommate hated me for it. I encouraged him to join a fraternity because I learned very early in life that women are not loyal, and passing them around like blunts on a conveyer belt is the only way you'd be able to sleep with several women at once. And yea they'd often jump the cock ladder in a fraternity until they reached the really hvm and then get ghosted...

The issue is that girls outside this wanton rotation see me with all these girls and guy friends and want to hop in instead of giving another single guy a chance.

So in summation it's not one guy getting 100s of women (unless you're really hvm top 5% celebrity, athletes, etc)... It's more like 2-3 guys to several hundred women.

SaBahRub · 2021-10-20T20:32:51+00:00

No no, it’s 95/5 or 99/1, didn’t you know?

So yes, 1-5% of men have ncounts in the thousands and tens of thousands, which means you know at least 1-5 of them well

Check amongst yourselves! Who could it be?

gimpgirl555 · 2021-10-20T22:54:06+00:00

This is what my man told me: girls would go to parties and hook up with guys there. They would proposition the guys, especially when the guys were drunk. Several guys got taken advantage of. This was before OLD. Nowadays girls just go home to the guy and fuck him.

nicog67 · 2021-10-20T20:34:57+00:00

Because its not true

qclady · 2021-10-20T20:36:51+00:00

It’s a numbers issue for me. The top 10% of men don’t have the time to have sex with all of the women who are having sex. In order for this to work, the men would have to be having sex with numerous women day and night. The women would end up seeing the other women come and go.

Physiologist21 · 2021-10-20T22:29:56+00:00

Why would you, I wish our mods would use a modicum of intelligence and stop letting such low IQ garbage through...

Then I remember who our mods are.

OneDumbPony · 2021-10-20T23:32:25+00:00

It's because it's a myth spread by some guys who have terrible personalities and no one will sleep with them because of it. Out of the 10+ guys I know, only one of them hasn't had a partner and slept with them, and it's not the nerd who wears thick glasses and draws hentai or the 5'2"-5'3" pudgy guy. Hell, most of the guys in this group are pudgy and there's nothing wrong with it.

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Ohyarlysmiles · 2021-10-20T21:56:04+00:00

First, the rule is 80/20. And that rule isn't even right. If you look at the GSS and other similar data, it's more like 20% is responsible for 50-60% of the sex that is occurring. That means 80% of guys are fighting for the remaining 40-50%.

Why aren’t these men bragging about having a massive harem of thousands of women?

Um. It doesn't take one guy monopolizing that many women to create an imbalance. If we have 10 men and 10 women and the top guy gets 3 women, that leaves 9 men fighting over 6 women.

But incidentally, while it's fairly rare, when I do talk about this kind of stuff with other men who date multiple women or ones who don't, the fact that I'm dating multiple women will come up in one way or another. I used to brag years ago, though. Lots of guys brag about it.

Why aren’t these men complaining about having too many women waiting on them?

Again, this happens. It either shows up in 'omg i forgot I was supposed to see x for y' or 'holy shit everyone wants too much of my time' or it manifests in increasingly superficial and arbitrary reasons to just cut some woman off (I've noticed this a lot in myself but in others too).

Why aren’t women complaining about being his 1,342th pick instead of the 234th pick?

They do (not quite so numerically).

Why aren’t women bragging about the ten thousandth woman added to the “Harem of the 10%”?

They do, but they do it in socially acceptable ways. Typically when a woman is talking about what a cheater, wild guy, etc. some guy she's sleeping with is but is still sleeping with him, that's what it is = she is bragging about just that. That's kind of why, at least for me, I've become sort of inoculated to any kind of criticism of that nature from women. It's the most perverse form of praise there is in many instances.

Someone would notice that they’re screwing the same gy sooner or later.

Eh, if you're in a big city the odds of two people randomly coming into contact with each other who are both sleeping with you are slight. But ya, if you're in a scene or something like downtown or whatever, oh sure. It happens.

Can someone please please explain this or is this satire that got out of hand?

I agree with you that the mythos of Chad or whatever is hilarious and can only be comprehended as such and taken seriously by people who just are inexperienced.

At the same time, there are definite elements of truth. Sure, they're wildly exaggerated (idk unless you're like a rockstar or superfamous or a Saudi Prince...then all bets are off) but hey...I've had experiences that I know the vast majority of people won't have. I'm 5'5. So just imagine if I was 6'4...and white.

LOL

Nah, just kidding. Those things make less of a boost past the 'threshold' than most people think.

Scarypaperplates · 2021-10-20T22:20:28+00:00

We both know why OP 😉

YveisGrey · 2021-10-21T02:14:13+00:00

It’s obviously exaggerated stat but you can’t tell the people who believe this drivel anything they are flat earther anti vaxxer level nutcases

FabulousFuchsbau · 2021-10-21T02:58:33+00:00

Why aren’t women complaining about being his 1,342th pick instead of the 234th pick?

They are, it's called "where are all the good men?"

Why aren’t women bragging about the ten thousandth woman added to the “Harem of the 10%”?

Slut shaming; everyone knows you're supposed to keep it on the DL.

Edit: Also how are these Chads hiding hundreds if not THOUSANDS of women from each other?

Even Giga-Chad isn't fucking 2+ women literally every day.

I mean ... just don't invite them over at the same time?

Also, the distinction between women wanting the top whatever-%, and actually getting it in some way is different.

GodFromMachine · 2021-10-21T04:40:03+00:00

Contrary to popular belief, most men aren't complete sluts that will sleep with any woman as long as she has a pulse. 80% of women WANT to sleep with the top 20% of men, it doesn't mean the actually get to.

Some amongst the top 20% will whore it up and fuck everything that moves, and these guys will have hundreds of girls lined up, but most of that 20% will either be in a monogamous relationship, or have standards too high for most girls.

BasicallyYogurt · 2021-10-21T06:38:39+00:00

You seem quite out of the loop. They do.

Flat_Plane_V8 · 2021-10-21T10:29:43+00:00

Till age 31 I was sharing apartment...one guy was a comp sci nerd and incel ...there was me with one girlfriend...and there was a biracial guy an inch taller than me, but well built due to performance enhancing drugs and rigorous gymming.....He had different women over EVERY week....EVERY week..sometimes two at a time......Girlfriend got mad and forced me to move out, as I had went out with him a few nights and was looking to get into serious bodybuilding...

Need_wine · 2021-10-22T00:34:32+00:00

Because somebody looked at the dating app ratio and assumed all women are sleeping with top 20 percent of men.

I PREFER to be with a man that looks like Jason momoa but I have no chance of getting with him. I am an average looking woman, I attract average men, even on dating apps 🤷🏽‍♀️

JudeccasSupremacy · 2021-10-22T17:19:55+00:00

Um they are. Have you ever been to PornHub for Fetlife?

2021-10-23T12:30:25+00:00

If your average girl sleeps with about 10 guys one of those guys surely would be one of those 10%? The numbers probably add up because people are sleeping with multiple people and a minority of people fuck ALOT of people. Its not like your average statistical person sleeps with one person and their vaginas/cocks are zipped up for life.

I used to be in a circle we had all fked each other at some point and where the girls who were hooking were well over triple digits and they are not even 25 years old and many men lost their virginities to these escorts. so the same arguement could be made there that 85% of men have slept with 10% women. Its just that an outlier of people do MOST of the fucking both ways.

When got a bit lost in the kink scene after a bad heart break, a small group of men would get with practically every new girl that came in. A lot of new girls came in. It was strange because it seemed like most of these girls would do anything to belong and most just went back to their normal lives after getting passed around for a bit. So even if each of them fucked three of the guys and their totals are still only 6... well it adds up. You could go to a club and look around and probably hooked up with half the people there that night so when someone new came in it was like a game to see who could fk them first. I was pretty moderate when I got out compared to the old guys who were porn producers or riggers for decades. Easily in the quad digits for some of them probably more. Never a peep from a husband or boyfriend. I think many just dont want to know, kind of like how many married women know what their husband did on that business trip or in college, but dont want to deal it all of it.

suckadickretard · 2021-10-23T13:47:51+00:00

It's not "thousands of women a man". If you knew basic math you could figure it's 8.5 a man.

KxngAndre23 · 2021-10-24T12:05:06+00:00

Rotations.

Freelovehighway · 2021-10-24T20:12:24+00:00

I honestly don't believe it either. It might be possible but there would need to be a very weird set of circumstances for it to be a reality. I was in a college dorm in 3 european cities, I lived with good looking guys, I saw them bring over girls but they were never on rotation, there was no harems. These were handsome guys and they probably could have pulled your girlfriend if they wanted in the right circumstances but there was no real sign that they had unlimited girls on tap on a weekly basis.

CatchPhraze · 2021-10-21T00:54:07+00:00

Only 15% if woman have casual sex more then twice in their lifetime. Of that 15% 85% has sex with the top 20% of the portion of men who have casual sex.

All in all it's a minority.

Title	So if 85% of us are sleeping with 10% of the men, then how come we don’t see lines of women waiting outside the doors of these men?
Author	FabulousFuchsbau
Upvotes	7
Comments	356
Date	October 20, 2021 8:19 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/qc9yzh/so_if_85_of_us_are_sleeping_with_10_of_the_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/so-if-85-of-us-are-sleeping-with-10-of-the-men.1082757 https://theredarchive.com/post/1082757

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