The societal role of mother kills the sex life not the kid

decoy88 · 2021-02-16T14:18:22+00:00

I guess stereotypes and attitude towards women with children do play a certain role in a way they treat sex and whether they find themselves sexual beings at all, but when it comes to having less sex after childbirth, I think it's far more about a lack of time or energy. It's hard to want to have sex when you're exhausted and can't sleep well at nights.

gxga · 2021-02-16T16:47:47+00:00

I saw men getting upset because married mother of 3, Beyonce, showed some thigh and booty meat in her new promo for her athleisure line. This woman needs to answer to no one, is dependent on no one, got the husband, got the kids, is on top of the world and still people built like a thumb were being super foul and disparaging her.

These guys make being a mother sound like the most unfun, life ending thing in the world. Kind of how they talked generations of women out of seeing value in housekeeping and being a loyal wife, they do this about motherhood too and then will turn around and be shocked and appalled when the new gang of girls grow up and want absolutely nothing to do with it.

In cultures where there is more of a village mentality, this doesn’t happen as much. Women still get to be wives and not moms 24/7 because you can call your mom/sister/aunt to take the baby off you for a minute so you can bathe and feel like a normal person.

You mean cultures that care about families and the people that make them up? HA. That's not us. The US is hyper-individualistic and has anti-family teas all over the place starting with the men. What you're describing here sounds awesome. I know some immigrant families here try to keep that up but lol the US is "too good" (read: dumpster fire) to mind them and borrow some tips

wellokthatworked · 2021-02-16T18:39:20+00:00

It's amazing how many comments in here are totally off about what having kids is really like.

poppy_blu · 2021-02-16T17:19:56+00:00

As a mom married for 16 years this May, I’m going to give you youngins some advice to calm your post baby DB fears :

don’t marry someone who you know deep down isn’t attracted to you. Don’t lie to yourself.
don’t marry someone who is lazy and doesn’t pull their weight. Whether it’s housework or contributing to the HH income. They’ve shown you who they are. Why would expect a baby would make them change?
talk about expectations and division of labor BEFORE she has the baby. BEFORE she gets pregnant
after the baby, enlist help. Theres nothing shameful about asking for help from friends and family. OP said it — the village model worked for a reason.
give yourself and your spouse a break. You’re not compete in for mother/husband of their year here.
Women, don’t aim to be supermom. If you want him to do something, ASK HIM to do it.
Men, be patient. Help her feel sexy again. It’s important to take on your share of the load but even more than that, make sure she knows you still find her sexy. Don’t react to or nag her about her weight. Work out together if she’s struggling to lose the weight. Not only will it help her weight loss goals, but exercise boosts your endorphins, oxytocin, T — all things that increase sex drive.
get a babysitter and plan date nights or excursions out of the house where you can just be together without the baby. Even a grocery shopping trip alone can do wonders for your psyche. And yes I know how hard it is to leave your new baby for the first time, but they’ll be fine in the care of someone you trust for a few hours.
Women, that sexy lady who was there before is still there. She may need to take a backseat to child care responsibilities, but let her out of the closet every now and then. You’ll be glad you did.
women, ignore the bullshit. Don’t compare yourself to celebrities who got plastic surgery three weeks after giving birth. Don’t compare yourself to your friends. Take their advice with a grain of salt — they aren’t you. Take internet advice with a grain of salt. Your path to your new normal is uniquely you. Celebrate it.
try something new. Now might be a good time to experiment with toys or watching porn together or role playing or whatever.
know that no matter what, your relationship can be as sexy and fulfilling as ever if you take active steps to keep it that way.
most of all remember that mom is only one of the many roles you play.

2021-02-17T00:01:02+00:00

Having biological children is just sounding less and less appealing by the day.

NockerJoe · 2021-02-16T18:05:57+00:00

Why should she call mom/sister/aunt when the male parent is standing right fucking next to her?

Take the baby out for a half day & let her have some time alone. Then come home, make her some dinner & then eat that vag without expectation of reciprocation.

yknow, the shit women do for men all the damn time

Edit: bois, if you take the kid off her hands for a bit & then eat that pussy like groceries, you might find a spark of that woman you fell in love with.

relish5k · 2021-02-16T16:30:19+00:00

Having long hair around a baby is straight up hazardous. If I forget to put my hair in a bun when I'm changing her, she attacks me.

Truthfully, I could care less about what "society" thinks about mothers. I care about what *my* husband thinks about *me*. As long as he finds me desirable, that's what matters.

For all of the reasons one can be a bad mom, being sexy must be the stupidest. There are so many other more important areas where one can screw up parenting.

AffectionateFox0 · 2021-02-16T16:42:08+00:00

You’re totally right that it isn’t purely innate to drop all sexuality and become a mommy. That is variable by culture. Ignore all the people saying it’s not they most likely have no awareness of other cultures. However I don’t agree it’s the village mentality that makes a difference. IMO what matters is simply if the culture a values sexual affection, and b can still see women over a certain age as sexy. In certain roman culture both those criteria are met, and so women will still behave seductively and as sexual beings even as middle aged mothers. In some more Puritan cultures in which sexuality is more moralized and repressed and more men have Madonna whore complexes you will see more of the chopping off your hair and calling it a day.

XtoDoubt · 2021-02-16T14:03:49+00:00

This would make more sense if it was the men who had the steep drop off in arousal for their spouse and not the women.

2021-02-16T17:48:15+00:00

Kinda sounds more like those women's perceptions of themselves as mothers is what kills the sex life. If women don't see themselves as desirable or desired by others, for whatever the reason, their desire to have sex falls to below sea level.

I dont know if this has something to do with autogynephilia or not, but sometimes it seems like that is the case.

2021-02-16T21:49:59+00:00

What's with the blame everything on society? I get that things happen outside our control, but this concept is too nebulous. It's a joint-on-the-couch notion. A husband / father is expected to work and share in household duties, while making it look effortless, and allowing the complaints from wife/mother, and children to bounce of his chest after he gets back from a 10 hour day (if following gender norms). A woman having multi-faceted responsibilities shouldn't be a problem for a functioning adult. Look as sexy as you want, or dont. Maybe women care too much about external validation. It's not like men dont have those pressures either.

To be clear, most judgement of other women or mothers comes from other women or moms. You say "society" places these expectations on women, but let's be honest here. I've never seen a man judge a woman for being too anything unless he is evaluating her as a spouse or business partner, or she will in some material way be intertwined in his life. And that seems reasonable to me. Maybe I'm in the rare corner of the earth here, but it's really women's expectations of other women. And I'm not certain it's all bad either - to have some shared or communal expectations.

At the end of the day, it's about how the adults choose and prioritize what the centerpiece of a household will be. When adults choose to make everything about the kid and deprioritize their spouse, marriage or cohabitation suffers. When those things suffer, kids suffer. It's a nasty loop, and one I don't think is very healthy. Obviously prioritizing kids is important and sensible, but the extent to which we have done this is unhealthy IMO.

2021-02-16T22:55:54+00:00

Oh god, would people quit blaming society for fucking everything here?

Lets say you are right, and you aren't but lets say you are right. Society is the probem.

Well guess what you can tell society to easily fuck off in the west, as we gave up stoning a long time ago.

Society says sex clubs are bad and I've had sex with a LOT of mothers in them. Those women told society to fuck off.

Lets put it this way, you are the only one in charge of YOU an how YOU act. If you conform to society thats up to YOU.

But that being said, no its not society, its hormones, its responsive desire, its general female lower libido and habituation with the same partner. Some women never go through this, and they are still part of society, others lose their sex drive.

poppy_blu · 2021-02-16T15:23:45+00:00

Stress and tiredness kills sex.

When I am stressed or tired no sex gonna happen. Most sex happens when I am in a relaxing environment and had enough rest. It's up to man to create this situation where a woman is relaxed. I have the most sexual drive when we are travelling in nice places and spend quality time together.

2021-02-16T16:07:12+00:00

Women with long hair are commonly told to enjoy to while they can. At the same time, so called mom bobs are made fun of. It’s a weird place to be. People seem to forget that parents are people too.

In cultures where there is more of a village mentality, this doesn’t happen as much. Women still get to be wives and not moms 24/7 because you can call your mom/sister/aunt to take the baby off you for a minute so you can bathe and feel like a normal person

Wtf are you even talking about?

LillthOfBabylon · 2021-02-16T16:13:52+00:00

The way society sees mothers is the root cause of sex declining post baby.

I mean I don't think society blames women and children for that.

If one isn’t careful, their partner will see themselves only as a mom- a sexless short haired high waisted pant wearing milk machine. It’s really easy especially when this is the image society has of mothers.

That person is probably an asshole who needs to be divorced.

They’re bad mothers because they’re very sexual, but mothers are bad because they’re not sexual enough.

I dont see people thinking this way other than incels and MGTOW.

poppy_blu · 2021-02-16T16:16:48+00:00

OOH you have a point. Traditionally, a woman went from everyone’s visual property to her husband’s visual property to no ones visual property when she became a mother. A married woman was supposed to look good as a positive reflection on her husband, sure, but not too good lest she attract other men (remember now, men can’t be expected to control their own urges!) And when she became a mother that was now her life’s role and it was the antithesis of sexy (look at how homely maternity clothes were prior to the 1990s.) married men of the past were concerned neither with how sexy their wives were nor how much they enjoyed the sex. That’s what side hos were for. A sexy wife was a liability as was a wife who liked sex.

We’ve evolved today. I think most men want their wives to maintain both their looks and their interest in sex. Where I’m challenging your view is that it is in the control of the woman and her partner.

Speaking from experience, you don’t feel very sexy with stretch marks, baby weight, exhaustion from getting up every 2 hours and the overstimulation of a crying baby touching and crawling all over you all the time. I completely relate. But you are still a sexual being. The trick is to find a balance between the two. It’s also critical to have help, because it’s much easier to feel this way when you’re overwhelmed.

This of course is generalization. It varies woman to woman and there could be legit physical reasons a woman isn’t interested in sex after a baby.

SomeoneIsHere69 · 2021-02-16T16:32:03+00:00

Cohabitation. Weight gain for both partners. Stress and no time.

Rook_Cross · 2021-02-16T16:48:59+00:00

What are these cultures with a "village mentality"? Are they first world or third world? Yes, let's imitate third worlders. I also sincerely doubt these "village culture" mothers are taking time to pamper themselves. They're taking care of the kids, or working, or doing both at the same time. You have an idyllic view that just isn't reality There are plenty of Westerners with grandparents and aunts/uncles who will take the kids, the nuclear family isn't against extended family (and ideally grandparents would be added back into the household and often are there). But even with them not there, they take the kids still too. Women chose to focus on the kids and neglect their marriage all too often then blame the guy. They chose to cut their hair and not eat right and exercise. Having a kid is tiring, especialliy when young, but it isn't all consuming. Mothers take too much on themselves because they want to or won't let the fathers do it (because they're not doing it the exact way the mother wants, though it is his kid too and he has just as much of a say). Even when the woman has to do everything, cooking and cleaning too, there really are plenty of hours in the day to get it done. Women build it up into this big thing but it's not even as much work as a 9-5 job. There's also the difference between being sexy for your husband and being "sexy" (slutty, advertising it). You don't have to wear revealing clothing and look good for the masses, just wear modest clothes most of the time and some cute undergarments for your husband. Your sex life is no one else's business, it is between you and your husband. Those expectations are in your head, worrying what others think instead of your husband, wrong priorities. Now, some husbands have unrealistic expectations of how much attention they should still get with a child in the mix and how a woman's body should look after giving birth, then it is a him and a society problem, being shallow. But most moms are carrying like 20lbs extra and aren't in the category of those who have done a good job maintaining a healthy body but just can't get back to how they were without surgery. Women prioritize the wrong things and shift blame too much. Men too. but what you're talking about is mainly a woman making the wrong choices thing, not a societal thing.

Alfredaux · 2021-02-16T17:00:31+00:00

Hormones would like to have a word with you.

Hoopy223 · 2021-02-16T15:36:44+00:00

No it doesn’t.

Hormones change, they get all out of shape which exacerbates the hormonal problem, they spend more time with their children so the husband feels neglected etc.

Plus in our workaholic society the working class don’t have much free time anyways so having kids means less and less time together.

TheOffice_Account · 2021-02-16T16:42:18+00:00

Society doesn’t like violent men, but it does approve of dangerous men that know how to control it and themselves.

Society doesn’t like promiscuous women, but it does approve of women who know how to control and temper their sexuality and themselves.

I’m skeptical that it’s solely women’s self-conceptualization that is the cause for their drop in libido - especially in the first few months after giving birth. Id argue sleep patterns, stress, and diet have a far larger contributing effect.

However, the psychological impact of what your body looks like after pregnancy does give some women heightened anxieties. These are usually people who have ego-invested entirely on looks, and don’t have other accomplishments to draw upon for self-esteem. They are also often the same people who don’t realize how resilient the human body is and how readily it can return to pre-pregnancy appearance.

xFallacyx69 · 2021-02-16T15:11:52+00:00

Nah it’s probably the stress of raising a kid... and this “excuse” is extra-stupid if you factor in the fact that women are increasingly ditching gendered roles but sexlessness and divorce rates are increasing.

I’m not saying go back to traditional roles, but we need to understand that sex is fun and it’s not some weird covert patriarchy that’s killing your sex drive... it’s just life. Work through it with your spouse, or divorce them, drink wine, and talk to your cats... no one truly cares either way except the college bros you’ll be blowing while you tell them how hot you were at their age, and only they care for like that 20 minutes (if that)

Banned_BY_SOYMEN · 2021-02-16T16:18:29+00:00

Funny how all these middle aged mothers have the libido to go and cheat though.

czerdec · 2021-02-16T16:20:54+00:00

Ugh, more extreme Social Constructivism presented as obvious fact despite a complete absence of evidence, as if we don't already know that genetics have a much more prominent role to play in human outcomes than "the upbringing determines everything"

Bandit174 · 2021-02-16T14:17:02+00:00

I think it's probably just hard in general to keep a sexual spark with the same person over decades of time. I think it's called the "seven year itch" so we can maintain a passion for someone for about the time it would take to raise an infant to 7 or 8 years old. Beyond that it's probably difficult. Furthermore most women probably end up with average dudes who they were never all that attracted to in the first place.

kissmetilyouredrunk · 2021-02-16T14:37:08+00:00

BS. Quit finding excuses and just call it what it is - "I can't provide you with what you need. I'd like to, but simply can't, I don't have what it takes. It's just not as fun to me as it seems to be for you."

Interesting how chicks regularly fuck the guy's brains in in hopes of getting him to marry her so she can stop the sex and route all energy and focus into kicking resentment, expectations and nagging into overdrive, because when married "he is hers now and she doesn't have to pretend and compromise anymore".

87AudreyHorne · 2021-02-16T16:15:26+00:00

I just dont get why and how some women allow this to happen to them. I was a kid when I knew I'd never let that be me (my mom wasnt that either and I'm very happy for that)

Like fuck all if you made a mistake to have a kid with a guy who doesnt do shit then dump him and go live with your mum or literally anything just dont be a fucking martyr. Better to be a single mum than to also benefit some moron in the process. And I dont buy that whole "if I dont do it then it will never get done" either - let it never get done then. I dont get why women worry so much.

And I'm not saying this to be critical of them but because hearing that makes me want to help snap them out if it

Also why the hell would having a kid mean you have to cut your hair!!

poppy_blu · 2021-02-16T14:11:48+00:00

I don’t think it the societal role so much as it is the biological role. The second a woman becomes a mom her spouse becomes second-best. And that’s fine, that’s absolutely how it should be, but it has the unfortunate side-effect of causing a great deal of indirect strain on the partnership.

The_Informed_Dunk · 2021-02-16T14:37:03+00:00

>In culture where...

Yes, bring back extended family culture and the Bible. Modern society will only leave the majority of women single mothers to the detriment of themselves (in all ways, not just sexually) but more important than them to the detriment of the children. The nuclear family is a lie: aunts, uncles, grandparents etc. should be in a kid's life.

2021-02-16T15:32:37+00:00

Well if you're not married or committed to the woman, their sex drive is irrelevant anyway 🤷‍♂️

RubberAndSteel · 2021-02-16T16:29:43+00:00

I think a lot of women are just more stressed and sleep less after becoming a mother.

Sicilian_Drag0n · 2021-02-16T18:51:58+00:00

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RubberAndSteel · 2021-02-16T16:06:42+00:00

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Cobra_x30 · 2021-02-16T16:25:29+00:00

Most of this is crap. The fact is that the female sex drive is in part designed to keep the father around and engaged. When the government artificially steps in and places financial chains on a man to shackle him to a woman... then it creates an unnatural situation where women suddenly don't need to do anything to keep the guy and instead let the relationship go to shit.

If you go to places that don't have laws to financially fuck over men when a relationship fails, you find the ladies respond completely different.

Mkg102216 · 2021-02-16T14:24:35+00:00

this is one of the weirdest hamsterization I have ever seen...

mother losing interest in sex with her husband is purely biological, because husband has already finished his role. Now she needs to reproduce with other men for more genetic diversity and better chances of survival for one of her offsprings if it turns out that previous partner had some kind of genetic illness.

wtknight · 2021-02-16T14:52:17+00:00

Women still get to be wives and not moms 24/7 because you can call your mom/sister/aunt to take the baby off you for a minute so you can bathe and feel like a normal person.

She still has the social role of being a mother, though. I think a better point than the one that you're trying to make with the idea of a "societal role" is that women who aren't as tired out by their duties of working full-time plus taking care of the home are more likely to still want to have an active sex life.

Mkg102216 · 2021-02-16T17:26:52+00:00

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2021-02-16T18:30:13+00:00

Post-modernism: You have a problem, we can fix it! It's societies fault! Yeah, the wonderful cure for all that ails you - blame society.

I'm all for nature vs nurture arguments but you have to remember that it's not nature or nurture. I'll grant you that society has some standards and boundaries we might not like. But it seems that the people that pull out the nurture (society/culture/environment) argument never try to counter balance it with a nature argument.

I'm not a woman, nor a mother. But since you can assert things without evidence I will do the same.

Once a woman has a child her 'sex furnace' goes out. Much like a man after he cums. All the drive to has sex i extinguished because the mission was accomplished. What's different is that now mom has this child and she's so bonded with it and so worried about it that she can barely function. This happens will all children but especially the first. She has no idea what so expect and her brain is wired to translate every little noise the kid makes as a potential catastrophe. 24 hours a day she's so 'tuned' into that child's needs that the needs of the father aren't even on the radar. Again, I'll liken this to how women lament "I want him to chase me like he did in the beginning. He used to be so romantic" - Yeah, he wanted to fuck you. We try harder then. And when you wanted a baby you were sucking and fucking like crazy trying to get this guy to want to commit and so you could get pregnant. Now you got what you wanted, there is no more chase.

Another interesting thing to note about the difference between men and women is that, when men are stressed, we still want to have sex. Sometimes even more than when we aren't stressed. This isn't the same for women. Women want to feel warm and safe and cozy and trusting before they can be in the mood. This is because of testosterone.

For a very long time people that that testosterone caused men's, let's say, aggression. (I'm not talking violent aggression, I'm talking about the 'run down that antelope and kill it, we have to eat! kind of aggression.) But although testosterone is always present, it really kicks into gear in response to threats, wants, desires. It's what makes us push though the really hard shit. The side effect of this is that it also makes us horny. Makes us want to dominate and control when things seem/feel 'out of control'.

So, the man has also had a child. And he's gotta go to work. He can't change what he was doing before. For the woman, her whole life feels upside down. Like everything changed overnight - because it did. Now she's absolutely obsessed with the baby. And dad is still off for his 10 hour shift at the factory. His testosterone is 'up' but he has to push that aside and get back to work or they all die. But now his needs are being neglected. He's more stressed than he's ever been, but no one cares about that - get to work! So he wants sex even more due to heightened testosterone and she wants sex even less because she's stressed about the baby and tired and her sex drive is in a sort of hibernation/recovery period.

And if women want the whole 'community' to raise the baby (which, BTW is why women lean towards left/communism.) then she needs to build that little community before the baby comes instead of all this 'strong and independent' shit. Women have always been dependents. Or at least, let's say, more dependent on others to survive than men.

Women will not accept a dependent man though. Fuck that. He needs to be strong and independent or she never would have wanted him to commit to her and she certainly wouldn't commit to him. She wouldn't be in a safe, secure, comfortable position if she had to 'baby' the man too. However, now that she has a child, it seems that anything a man expects from her is expecting to be 'babied'. "I'm not your mother!" is the refrain. It's meant to shift blame away from her responsibilities and shame him into feeling like he's asking too much - even it it's what he had before there was a baby. But no one cares. There's a baby now. His needs (especially sex) are so far down the priority list that no one gives a shit. As a matter of fact "how dare he complain!?"

Once a baby is born, a man is nothing but a resource and utility to women, the children and anyone from the outside looking in. Now mama has her meal ticket and an excuse to get out of anything. And society will back her up 100%. Funny - women don't mind 'society' so much when it's on their side. But society didn't make you grow long hair. That was you trying to attract a man. Society may have shown you what men want (long hair, feminine, sex - but not from the village whore) but it didn't make you do anything. But now you have a child - society will send a fucking army to your door to save you. So now society is ok right? lol

A woman's love/hate relationship with 'society' just depends on what she wants at the time. When society is against or even just indifferent to you, you hate it and blame it for everything. When it's with you and aligns with your goals you fucking love it like a warm comfy blanket.

2021-02-16T21:21:09+00:00

The end goal was always the child, not the husband’s pleasure. As soon as the baby arrives, hubby is invisible. A man is a means, not a destination.

Feminsmkildredtt · 2021-02-17T02:23:30+00:00

Take note. Feminism has always been about the fear of the responsibilities of motherhood, and fear of responsibility in general.

CentralAdmin · 2021-02-17T02:34:15+00:00

The kids needs are what causes this.

But here's the important part: she chose to be a mom. If she chose to do so with no support network, then of course it will dominate her life. How she responds to motherhood is on her. Yes, it's draining. Yes, it interrupts your sex life. But a little preparation goes a long way.

Babies need food, sleep, clothes, time close to its caregivers and some sort of entertainment. They also need vaccinations and doctors visits but those aren't as frequent as, say, diaper changes. Within a few weeks you'll start establishing a schedule of feeding, napping and cleaning.

There are also slings and harnesses you can buy to keep baby close to you to free your hands. If you're constantly frantic and cannot keep up, you're managing your time poorly or you're not prepared. The internet is full of useful tips and ideas. You can also hire a nanny to help you if grandma and grandpa are not at hand.

You shouldn't be completely lost unless you're a really ignorant, poor, single mom who made very poor choices in life.

We don’t like skanks remember? They’re bad mothers because they’re very sexual, but mothers are bad because they’re not sexual enough.

No, those women are bad mothers because they're in the club at midnight instead of at home with their kid.

No one criticises a woman for being too sexual with her husband. In fact, being a MILF is fantasy for men of all ages. I just fail to see how coming home to a wife who takes care of herself and who has taken care of the kids is somehow bad because she wants to fuck your brains out at night.

Is it because she chooses not to dress like a slob when she's out? Because there are plenty of sexy moms around who nobody criticises for looking good.

What do you even base 'too sexual' on with regards to the expectations placed on a mom?

And what's with the false choice between skank and slob? It's not that hard to wear casual clothes and not look like a prostitute. Is there no middle ground?

GrandRub · 2021-02-16T16:19:11+00:00

no woman has to have kids... they know the cons and do it regardless...

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2021-02-16T17:36:52+00:00

That’s not it. It’s the acknowledgment that a mother is only going to acknowledge or offer any man attention in her life after her kids, her job, her friends, and her pets. It’s also a situation in which there probably won’t be any definable boundaries between her and those kids. She’ll also have debts and of course everyone that is prioritized over him (including the pets) will have to validate him as acceptable.

This is reality in a country where the majority of parents are single.

It’s not the hair that’s the turnoff...

superlurkage · 2021-02-16T20:42:41+00:00

Porque no los dos?

2021-02-16T21:17:00+00:00

The village mentality concept is a an important point to emphasize. The decline of any sort of village mentality and communitarian values in general is the root cause of many of society’s new ills in the western world.

Mkg102216 · 2021-02-16T21:47:17+00:00

Very true that mothers risk getting a lot of shame if they appear sexy. Plus there's the stress of raising children, and not looking the same as they used to, and the wonky hormones.

GridReXX · 2021-02-17T04:25:13+00:00

Maybe, but IMObservation it’s also primarily the lack of comprehensive support from the mom’s male co- parent.

I also think men uphold Madonna/Whore fairly consistently. They freak out moralistic “the mother of my children can’t do XYZ!”

2021-02-17T08:58:41+00:00

A couple on reddit whined a while ago that their children cock block them and they hate their own children, I told them to stop whining and they started sending me lols and uwus. I seriously can't beleive both of those people are 30 years old. Are all americans this annoying and immature or is it just those two?

Willow-girl · 2021-02-17T15:31:45+00:00

a sexless short haired high waisted pant wearing milk machine.

Aren't many women content with this, though?

I'm thinking of the social media of a young woman in our extended family. Her FB is all kid pics and references. Occasionally her male partner will show up in a pic, usually with a game controller in one hand while awkwardly clutching the baby in the other, a completely checked-out expression on his face. Clearly he has become an afterthought now that she has fulfilled her biological imperatives (three kids).

She doesn't seem unhappy.

BioStu · 2021-02-17T15:40:56+00:00

Solution=Antinatalism

Frosting_Pretty1111 · 2021-02-17T16:13:34+00:00

Most of the moms I know have long hair.

HobbitShaker88 · 2021-02-19T17:20:33+00:00

I agree- assuming there is no relationship issue, mental health issue or body image issue causing a sudden lack of sex drive after children, it is almost always the woman taking on too much- work, housework, childcare, emotional stuff around kids.

However, women are expected to take on more of a role with this, and will be critiqued when they dont or are unwilling, so you cannot win. I get criticized for expecting an equal partner in this way.

Title	The societal role of mother kills the sex life not the kid
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	179
Comments	393
Date	February 16, 2021 2:00 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/ll4dar/the_societal_role_of_mother_kills_the_sex_life/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-societal-role-of-mother-kills-the-sex-life-not.1192402 https://theredarchive.com/post/1192402

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