Are women's standards too high as a result of porn?

Insane-Wallflower · 2023-09-26T02:05:01+00:00

The men in porn are really unattractive, and aren’t what we focus on at all. If a woman is watching porn 9/10 out of ten she’s more focused on the woman and her reactions than the man. Why do you think lesbian porn is one of the most popular porn categories for women? As someone who’s been reading erotic romance since I was 9 they do kinda effect your romantic and sexual desires if you’ve been reading them long enough, but I don’t think it’s the main reason for a woman having high standards.

SDW137 · 2023-09-26T01:48:42+00:00

Nope, women just have high standards due to more options.

AngeCruelle · 2023-09-26T01:52:13+00:00

The average male in straight porn looks like they walked up to some dude at a truck stop and said "hey you wanna do porn"

demedermidimi · 2023-09-26T01:35:47+00:00

women generally don't want monstrous penises. the men in porn are also often ugly

begayallday · 2023-09-26T04:27:11+00:00

Do women even like watching porn with guys in it? Because I do not.

IronDBZ · 2023-09-26T01:33:38+00:00

Probably not...

Women's standards are a reflection of many things, but porn ain't one of them. I'd bet anyway.

Their values impact their standards.

Their libido.

Their lack of it.

Their education.

Anything that impacts their self-concept, really.

It's about what they think they deserve, what they know they deserve, what they enjoy, what excites them, what makes them feel safe, what makes them afraid.

A whole bunch of shit. But most women aren't porn addicts.

And the ones that are don't tend to have such an outsized influence on general culture.

If you want to know why women do or think something you'll have to go to the river, not the dry well. Drops in your bucket tell no stories. Look to the popular media, what has their attention.

You'll understand women better with a Beyonce/Taylor Swift Playlist than whatever you're cooking up

thisreallyisnotok · 2023-09-26T01:25:07+00:00

I doubt this tracks. One of my exes had a mild porn addiction/had favorite porn stars. She just needed to get dicked down a little more than normal. I actually didn’t find it desensitized her that much and actually she took much longer to orgasm from masturbation still, but I think that’s because she was insecure about buying a dildo which she probably needed for masturbating.

Perhaps porn did cause her to rely more on penetration for orgasms.

Edit: I do think erotica can be a double edged sword: it can encourage women’s sexual imagination or it can sort of bastardize their fantasies with cliche erotica tropes. The beauty and the beast trope is honestly kind of a lame fantasy to me and I think is slightly condescending toward men.

szclimber · 2023-09-26T03:44:49+00:00

No, it's social media and dating apps. They have unlimited options.

bluestjuice · 2023-09-26T01:24:21+00:00

Porn is mostly not aimed at the female gaze or the sexual interests of female viewers.

But standards are probably skewed irretrievably high by Mr. Darcy.

retal1ator · 2023-09-26T03:31:48+00:00

No, but the answer is social media and romantic media.

Social media inflate the sense of abundance in women, it makes them feel as if men are endless and always interested in them; mainly due to simping.

Romantic novels and media inflate the requirements women have for men, the biggest issue is men being depicted as mere providers of emotional and financial support. Also many media nowadays celebrate toxicity in relationships.

salsasushi · 2023-09-26T02:07:40+00:00

I heard recently (I think it was a study) about the differences in male and female attraction to their partners after looking at attractive people of the opposite sex on social media. Women could look at men who fit their ideals and still look at their partner the same. Men, however, might find their partner less attractive after looking at images of their ideal type.

It sounds like this is what you’re experiencing, rather than it being necessarily porn-related.

In terms of looks, whether it’s porn, movies etc, I could see attractive people and not be affected irl. The closest thing to what you’re describing that DOES happen for women, at least me and many women I know online/irl, books and movies can increase our standards in terms of behaviour.

444oo · 2023-09-26T03:15:27+00:00

Women’s standards are higher now than ever before because women are making their own money now, are financially independent from their partners, and more importantly, would rather stay single (and choke on antidepressants) than being in a relationship with a man that’s broke or unattractive. Whereas men would rather date a promiscuous/unattractive woman than being single. This is all, of course, based on what I read here and my experience.

WistfulPuellaMagi · 2023-09-26T02:38:26+00:00

Depends on the woman. Some do have a porn addiction and it can affect how they view romantic interests.

Safinated · 2023-09-26T04:27:30+00:00

In the sense that it makes sex look unappealing? Yes

lle-ell · 2023-09-26T07:17:41+00:00

Have you seen most men in porn? They have nothing going for them except their dick size.

Epiphanic_Eros · 2023-09-26T13:36:59+00:00

Women have high standards because they have the power to choose their partners, now. And they end up doing most of the work of relationships, so they’re wary of jumping into one.

The other big thing is really that everyone has become so online, these days, and it’s made the last couple generations rather timid and alienated from their bodies and the messy world of other human bodies

SianOiseau · 2023-09-26T01:57:28+00:00

I don't think that porn affects women's standards much considering that porn is generally pretty bad at depicting sex in a way that is appealing for women. Romantic novels can affect one's expectations, but they've been here for ages and so I doubt they could cause that significant of a change.

Imv women got higher standards because they can afford them. They aren't in a hurry to settle down, they can live on their own and they can have several trials and errors. Nowadays the idea of marriage built on romantic love is more common than marriage out of convenience and strictly speaking it's harder to find romantic love rather than just practical union, especially when one of the party was heavily pressed with time, options and finance.

A lot of women want to have a lover, partner and friend all in one person and it just takes more qualities and more luck to struck. Men experience higher pressure as with new expectations they still bear a good share of their old ones, although they aren't expected to be the only/main providers as much as before and generally they can afford not to grow up for a longer time than before.

MotherPermit9585 · 2023-09-26T13:09:46+00:00

Women’s higher standards for both casual and long term relationships are probably the result of having lots of options from online dating and having their own jobs so they’re not reliant on a man financially. If a woman is looking for something casual she’s going to pick the best looking man that’s her type and that she vibes with. For a long term relationship there will be more factors to consider for compatibility.

That being said, I do think porn can lead to unrealistic beauty standards for men too. I’m in the minority of women who actually do enjoy watching porn. I’ve watched porn since I was a teenager and I definitely think this is the source of my big dick fetish. Also it’s not true that men in porn are ugly on average. Maybe in the 80s and 90s they were (like Ron Jeremy types) but in modern porn - both gay and straight - the men typically look like mainstream actors with top tier physique (6 packs and chiseled) and at least above average dick (unless it’s some kind micro fetish porn or something). Men in porn also have more stamina and are hard on command, so that could contribute to some women being less sympathetic if a man isn’t always ready for sex etc.

amhaul-123 · 2023-09-26T04:49:42+00:00

Yea.. we want clean partners by clean I mean men who can wipe their ass properly but nope

januaryphilosopher · 2023-09-26T05:52:19+00:00

Women don't usually watch porn or read erotica, so I don't think you can say, if you feel the majority of women have standards that are "too high", it's because of content they're not even consuming.

RelationshipSalty369 · 2023-09-26T07:38:08+00:00

No, women's standards aren't actually that high. A very small percentage of women have standards that high, and it's because they don't actually want a man but social pressure to want one is stupid and the only way to ward it off is to be looking for a perfect man who doesn't exist. The rest want a partner, but we aren't raising men as partners yet. 🤷‍♀️

RonMexico432 · 2023-09-26T02:12:49+00:00

Women mostly watch lesbian pron, so I doubt it. It's more likely movies like Thor and Aquaman.

wheartv · 2023-09-26T02:22:42+00:00

I don’t know

Porn gets me so horned up that I think it makes me more attracted to women overall

I like amateur porn because the women are doing it for free and seem more into it (which puts the lie to the old thinking that no woman could possibly enjoying doing that) and the females in it are more realistic to what you see day to day

DrBoby · 2023-09-26T03:26:23+00:00

Stop saying women's standards are high.

They are dirt low, they have never been so low.

Do you know what's our grand-mothers body count ? It was about 1-2. They tried to remain virgin until marriage and married at 22, and that's it.

Nowadays women are at around 15 if not more. Women nowadays have the lowest standards in the history of humanity for casual sex. And for LTR they have low standard too because it's impossible for them to find a man willing to commit and have kids.

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NaturalBridge12 · 2023-09-26T04:07:47+00:00

It’s not porn it’s movies like twitchlight that make them all think some guy like that is gonna come sweep them off their feet. Guys aren’t actually like Robert Pattinson in real life mostly

RevolutionaryFig929 · 2023-09-26T06:53:05+00:00

The less you jerk off (or have sex), the more your standard go down

ThrowRA_forfreedom · 2023-09-26T07:28:42+00:00

Maybe not regular porn per se, but I could see romance novels and movies doing that, and also social media.

Ok_Smile_60 · 2023-09-26T16:35:29+00:00

I…don’t think so. While porn might harm some women, it’s much more destructive for men to consume.

Obviously the production is often harmful for women

MistyMaisel · 2023-09-26T17:14:37+00:00

At least in my case, no. I don't really watch porn. The only standards erotica would give you is not having sex until halfway through the book. (I joke, but really the standards aren't super high even in erotica).

Freeman_Goldshonnie · 2023-09-27T15:54:35+00:00

Maybe.

Title	Are women's standards too high as a result of porn?
Author	harmonica2
Upvotes	6
Comments	165
Date	September 26, 2023 1:18 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/16s9zyx/are_womens_standards_too_high_as_a_result_of_porn/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-womens-standards-too-high-as-a-result-of-porn.1232919 https://theredarchive.com/post/1232919

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