How do women view friendship with men?

Secret_Entry1840 · 2026-03-28T10:26:37+00:00

I have very close male friends. But I’m not attractive. Makes it easier or so I’ve been told. But I’m also different in a lot of ways to my other female friends so it could be a lot of reasons other than that but as I can’t separate my outside from my insides, who knows.

cb8585b · 2026-03-28T12:52:00+00:00

I’ve always had the same male friends. My closest male friend is gay though. I don’t view the friendships differently than all of my female friends/acquaintances. But my closest/best friends are women and nah I doubt I would ever be that close to a man.

TangerineEvery8912 · 2026-03-28T10:48:29+00:00

I never got onto the whole men and women can't be friends train. Men are not a monolith and I'm not a believer of bioessentialism. That being said, I have some very close male friends and they are awesome friends, I have alot of respect for them and as do they for me. I'm not going to write off the possibility for a great friend just because of what is between their legs. My female friends are also equal to my male friends in importance, the only thing that influences how much I value a friend is how good of a friend they are

-mixedsignals · 2026-03-28T13:33:38+00:00

I have both, best female friends and best male friends, honestly there's no difference.

AdorableTonight3930 · 2026-03-28T22:34:08+00:00

I prefer/ value female friendships more but male friendships are lower maintenance on both sides and more chill

Creative_cacti · 2026-03-29T00:18:58+00:00

I love my male friends and female friends pretty equally. Men offer a different energy and perspective and I think that it's impotortant have friends of both sexes. I'm a bit of a tomboy myself. Akso, being a spectator in a group of guys interacting is peak entertainment. I feel like male friendships are less deep emotionally but just as supportive in other ways.

theminxisback · 2026-03-29T03:26:08+00:00

I have very few male friends who don't outright want to have sex with me.

In general, I enjoy the select few male friendships I have and value them greatly. They give me faith in humanity and help support me in my work to continue to be an active emotional support system for other men.

pie-mart · 2026-03-28T17:18:27+00:00

I think there are some men who really can't be friends with women. Because they can't comprehend being close to a woman without having sex.

But there are lots of normal men who care about women as people and can be friends with women they get along with

I think some men think being just friends with a woman means doing boyfriend stuff for her but not getting girlfriend stuff back. And this is just a warped way to look at it

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2026-03-28T09:39:17+00:00

I had a big mixed sex friends groups and male and female best friends and never once thought about it at all

ValeWho · 2026-03-28T10:57:04+00:00

I am friends with several men and yes to me there isn't much of a difference between my guy and girl friends. Depends more on the person than on their gender honestly.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2026-03-28T13:25:23+00:00

I have male friends but do have different boundaries with them. I wouldn’t share a bed or get changed in front of them.

But apart from that no difference other wise

VenusNoire_ · 2026-03-28T13:47:55+00:00

I prefer male company over female company, but my friendships lean a bit romantic/ambiguous in general. Whose individual presence I value more is dependent on context and the actual relationship.

Waschaos · 2026-03-28T14:29:33+00:00

When I was a teenager, I got some into some spats with other girls that led me not to trust them, so most of my friends in high school were guys. It took me a long time to generally trust women again, but I'm glad I did. I got some great deep friendships with women after that and my friend group became more balanced. My guy friends are still important and I'm probably closer to a lot of them then the women I'm friends with. I think this is also because I like to design and build things and more guys like to talk about that.

But as another commenter said- I don't think I'm hideous, but not great looking. That probably helps. Also it turned out most of my high school male friends were in the closet back then and I had no idea.

Novadina · 2026-03-28T16:21:37+00:00

I don’t really care what gender someone is. I have friends of both genders. I don’t see my male friendships as less valuable than the female ones, how close I am usually depends more on the person, some of my closest friends are men. Most of my friends are married and I am too, so none of us are trying to date each other.

Tylikcat · 2026-03-28T20:46:29+00:00

I've always had both male and female friends - hell, when I was a kid, I tended to have more male friends because a lot of my interests were male coded.* I often had a bunch of interest linked male friends, and one or two close female friends.

As an adult, it's not the gender, it's the person. And yet, there are still some generalities.

I have more close female friends. I mean, I'm lucky in having a lot of friends. And I know a lot of people blame social media for declining real world friendships - but in my circles, social media makes it much more possible to stay in touch with extended groups of friends. (Though we cut our teeth** on a much less algorithm driven internet.)

Even my closest male friends sometimes struggle over what I see as pretty basic social stuff. Also, the women generally do a better job of keeping in touch, and I'm more likely to have more frequent one on one conversations with them. Among my closest friends, call it my ride or die crowd, women outnumber men by four or five to one, I think? (Estimation, because closeness isn't so easily measured.)

*Computers, math, engineering, making explosives - hey, it was the eighties, smart science focused kids often made explosives.
**I've been in the net since '78 - when I was five. AKA "When the net was flat." So I've been around for a lot of iterations.

ETA: As I grew up I made friends with a lot of women who were also very quantitative and technical, and who were frequently martial artists, so the initial split between a group of science-y guy friends and one or two close female friends declined.

anomalocarus · 2026-03-29T00:56:20+00:00

I havent had a male friend since highachool because they all ended up hitting on me. The only male friend i had in universtiy waited until i ended my 3 year relarionship and then started hitting on me. I know better now, maybe if i ever became ugly id try to make male friends though.

Ronniebbb · 2026-03-29T02:22:39+00:00

I view it the same as I do my female friends. Were friends, it's a different form of family. And I going to care about, support and protect them. I'm also going to be real with them when needed.

However when we play boardgames...there will be no mercy.

saintdaffy · 2026-03-29T04:58:44+00:00

i have male friends. all of them being taken makes it much easier. i value all of my friendships though my deepest and most vulnerable relationships are definitely with my girl friends.

RelativeYak7 · 2026-03-28T10:21:18+00:00

I do not trust men's ulterior motives so a male friend will have to prove himself over years and years to not want to fork me. Of course I won't be rude or let on that I'm thinking this the entire time. Btw.. no man has ever passed this test.

love_in_october · 2026-03-28T10:24:41+00:00

Most of my close friends are male. It just works out that way as I guess the interests I have are interests mostly men have. I think they have the same variety as friendships between women do in terms of quality.

Feisty-Saturn · 2026-03-28T12:03:25+00:00

I had one guy friend in my 20s. There was never anything romantic from either of us so I do think men and women can be friends. But every guy I dated had an issue with this relationship. I think a lot of people, probably most, are not trusting of their partners having a friendship with the opposite gender. Because of this these relationships become more easily discarded.

UnstableHotspot · 2026-03-28T12:17:27+00:00

Yeh, male friends are cool. I like mine.

Suspicious_Glove7365 · 2026-03-28T13:01:40+00:00

I have tons of guy friends and a few who I’d definitely consider “inner circle” friends. I love my friendships with them. They’re not quite the same as my friendships with my best women friends, but I still value them equally. Honestly the person who would have been my real best friend became my boyfriend, so there is that too…

jenaemare · 2026-03-28T11:26:05+00:00

I love male friendship because it's actually a lot more fun and fulfilling at the end of the day for me!

First of all I think that men are a lot more objective with daily life matters & a lot more flexible in general. I'm sorry to say this, as a woman myself, but women require so much external emotional regulation & comfort.

I will probably be called a pick me, but this is just my lived experience. I used to be part of a big mixed group and the problems were always created by the women. During our trips if the hotel bed was too uncomfortable it had to be everyone's problem. If we didn't all attend to one of the girls needs when she was cranky our whole day would be ruined.

Every time I had trips or hangouts with only the male side of the group it would be just pure fun, banter and beer. How can one not love this?

I have also lived with female and male roommates alike and I would 100% prefer a man. Right now living with 2 men (gay couple) and am the happiest I've ever been. Women have so many unexplainable and arbitrary rules for so many random things. Like why do you have to have exactly 3 pillows on each side of the couch and why do we have to always wipe the counters everyday girl. Just take a breather and chill. I'm now with my normal messy gays and nobody cares about pillow orders and 3 breadcrumbs on the table. Cleaning the house together is fun and not some stressful, tense dramatic huge moment that has to end in tears.

However I am a pretty emotionally avoidant female and one of the parts I hate most about female socialization and expectations from my girlfriends is to always talk and express our emotions, which I highly dislike. I prefer male companionship not just for romantic/sexual purposes but also the topics discussed are much more fulfilling for me: geopolitics, history, language, funny stories. With women it's all emotions and complications.

I do have strong female friendships but I feel like we're all male centered/pickmes, I just cannot ride the current wave of man hate and whatever they're doing now. I love men.

Theawkwardmochi · 2026-03-28T09:42:21+00:00

I guess everyone's going to have a different perspective on this but I see them as equal. I also don't necessarily associate relationships with men as sexual/romantic and relationships with women as platonic friendships, because I'm bisexual.

So if I excluded people I could potentially date from my potential friend groups I'd be left with just the gays 😂😂😂

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Hungry-Plantain-3315 · 2026-03-28T16:28:32+00:00

My friends all have the same value whether they’re men or women. It would be very shallow to see one as having more value than the other. They’re both humans at the end of the day.

jorts-enthusiast · 2026-03-28T17:06:27+00:00

Many of my closest friends are guys. I don’t really view it as different from my female friendships, but I’ve always had a lot of guy friends so to me it’s normal.

zyzyverssaint · 2026-03-28T19:09:35+00:00

I mean, my friends are my friends. I’ve got two best friends that I would do unspeakable things for, one is a woman and one is a man.

People are people, man. 🤷🏼‍♀️

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2026-03-28T20:12:42+00:00

Some women, probably. Just like some men view friendships with women as less valuable if the chance of potentially getting into her pants is off the table.

But I value my guy friends as much as I value my girl friends. I've known my closest guy friends since my teens, and even some more recent friends I've been friends with for close to a decade. We listen to each other, we support each other as best as we can, it's just a regular friendship.

DMmeClownPics · 2026-03-28T21:20:09+00:00

My male friends I have known for almost my whole life. Some of them since high school or my freshman year of college. I value them immensely. They have been much less likely to judge me and ditch me for making decisions they don’t agree with. Unfortunately I cannot say the same for some of my female friends (or former friends I guess).

ResponsibilityAny217 · 2026-03-31T07:40:51+00:00

do women view male friendship as less valuable than friendships with other women?

Yes.

But generally male friendships are still viewed very well. If it's a friend.

ladybird_00 · 2026-03-28T10:12:23+00:00

I’m not friends with men

KayRay1994 · 2026-03-28T13:24:03+00:00

Take this as a grain of salt cuase… you know

Prior to transitioning I loved my friendship with women, so I feel like I was that ‘guy friend close to the female friends’, though also my male friends have been generally great to me and many women in my larger groups - I do value their friendships and I’m sure many of my female friends value theirs and did value mine prior to transition as well. (Although I’m half n half with who I’m out to and who I’m not so the situation is a little all over the place)

As long as the friendship is genuinely healthy, open and not full of hidden ulterior motives, it actually ends up becoming a really nice bond, def more room for opens and closeness, but also like any good dynamic a good friendship is also what both sides put into it. Also, I will also add - male friends are fun, there is def this air of added spontaneously that they add just cause they do make things safer + are generally more willing to do stuff that could be a little dangerous (ex. Urban exploring, or going off trail on hikes)

NoDanaOnlyZuuI · 2026-03-28T17:33:19+00:00

Equally valuable

Lemon_gecko · 2026-03-28T11:11:44+00:00

I'm friends with some men, and my value of our friendship depends on us, how close we are etc. There is no different standard or gender thing, so all depends on what we do and how we feel around each other

Title	How do women view friendship with men?
Author	GarfeildHouse
Upvotes	15
Comments	89
Date	March 28, 2026 9:35 AM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1s5vx9n/how_do_women_view_friendship_with_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-do-women-view-friendship-with-men.1576571 https://theredarchive.com/post/1576571

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