CMV: "Provider" males should employ sugar dating strategy by 30s rather than marry women in 30+ range that rode CC

majani · 2020-09-19T13:56:53+00:00

Most men are queasy about openly transactional sex. Needing to straight up give women money for sex is an extremely negative social signal.

TepidTeas · 2020-09-19T15:46:56+00:00

Provider men want to provide for wives and their own children they don’t just want to provide indefinitely for a random chick. They may have that urge for a couple years until she ages out but the provider thing is also about legitimate progeny and family.

JohnDoe9564 · 2020-09-19T13:59:57+00:00

This can only work with millionares or very high 6 figures.

If you're already there there's really no point of marriage. Divorce law in its current state is disastrous.

nemma88 · 2020-09-19T13:57:47+00:00

Providers don't want a harem of young women.

They want a wife, a midlife crisis car, a picket fence and most times kids. Men who want a harem of women are not provider's.

reluctantly_red · 2020-09-19T14:29:09+00:00

Rent/lease a newer model or buy an older one? A question without any universal answer.

Jaktenba · 2020-09-19T17:20:41+00:00

Sugar babies cost an abolsute fortune.

They are also not providing you with companionship or children.

BapAndBoujee · 2020-09-19T15:02:30+00:00

Social shaming. Men are valued for their readiness to take a shit deal at every corner, going the YOLO route is perceived as immature and exploitative by people who chose the betabux route

throwaway91078 · 2020-09-19T14:04:23+00:00

I don't think men in their 30s can easily become sugar daddies with hot young girls, unless they are very rich. I hear this a lot and it seems very naive to assume it. Like how would this work in practice? You take a screenshot of your bank account and put it in OLD app? Young women are of the same type of the older 30s women, which means they are looking for hot guys not providers. They will be looking for providers once they reach themselves the post wall age range.

The strategy for men with financial capabilities is not to try pull young women, who in most cases will still only sleep around with hot guys, rather to engage with those 30-something women but keeping these 2 options in mind: 1) you lie faking that you are also looking for commitment, get the sex you want and disappear 2) you make it clear you are not going to ever marry and/or have kids (get a vasectomy)

I personally switch between the two options depending on the girl: manipulative girls get their same treatment (option #1), decent girls who are upfront about their past get the truth and they can take it or leave it.

BrainlessMutant · 2020-09-19T17:10:10+00:00

This goes to show how sheltered pathetic fragile incels and “beta vs alpha” thinkers and shit are. Lots of good looking career minded 30+ women would date a younger guy. Your n count obsession is solely based on being afraid of comparison to past partners and being found inadequate, which is not how the mind works unless you’re truly sorely inadequate and you know it. If you’re in the latter, seeking a low n count mate to hide this, is pure manipulation and you know your personality is not enough to make up for it and you’re unwilling to work on it

angels-fan · 2020-09-19T14:43:39+00:00

Hell, with feminism running the show, it won't be long before men have to pay alimony to girlfriends and sugar mamas.

Like that guy in Canada that has to pay $50,000 mo alimony to his gf because they broke up. They didn't even live together!

hepazepie · 2020-09-19T14:52:22+00:00

Woah, dude whats with the lingo? I dont know halt the words/abbreviations you use. But I guess a harem of youbg hotties will make you a daddy, but not a father

Uhhh_Yeah_I_Squat · 2020-09-19T18:42:21+00:00

Nothing wrong with sugar dating strategy but a few things need to be taken into the consideration. 1. Is that important that she like you or you are okay with her being borderline repulsed by you? Of attraction is important you need at least look reasonable and not to be old and too short. 2. Can she date other men? If you want her exclusively i guess it might cost you more. 3. How hot she should be? Probably beautiful girls would want more money, can you afford it?

Joey_Lopez · 2020-09-19T15:14:13+00:00

I would say it's better to play salt daddy game and let the girls think that you are going to give them something. You could probably have sex 2 or 3 times before she realizes you aren't going to give them anything.

crookedsummer2019 · 2020-09-19T14:34:08+00:00

Harem lol. This word gets misused constantly here.

If he wants to have a group of young sugar babies to fuck then that’s what he should do, but those women are not just fucking him, they have other costumers and often boyfriends in their personal lives, so it’s not a harem.

flamingoinghome · 2020-09-19T14:01:29+00:00

It may amaze you to hear, but plenty of guys want kids and to live with a partner. Maybe grow old with someone. Hard to do that with a bunch of sugar babies.

If you guys are so afraid of financial issues in a marriage, then prioritize a high-earning woman. Contrary to RP gospel, most guys can do this--if they're willing to date someone who is perhaps not the single hottest woman they could date.

Talksaboutjobs · 2020-09-19T14:12:40+00:00

No, they should deprogram themselves from the blue pill beta thinking and go full red pill.

anon232432532 · 2020-09-19T15:10:17+00:00

I am a 23 year old guy and currently save 60k after taxes/ expenses (no debt). This is going to be my strategy as I accumulate wealth. After reading through the FDS subreddit, why in the hell would I financially tie myself to that kind of ungrateful harpy? I would gladly just use my money to help a few 18-22 year olds pay off their worthless english degrees instead.

Mrs_Drgree · 2020-09-19T13:39:49+00:00

[removed]

ElGupo1978 · 2020-09-19T17:57:32+00:00

That’s a lot of money

midwesternMD · 2020-09-19T20:37:26+00:00

Depends on the man’s goals. I usually date one sugar baby at a time. I’m also dating women conventionally- I want the whole wife/house/kids story, and it’s not likely to find that with someone 15yrs my junior.

I don’t date above 32 though.

And I realize I’m “risking” ending up with a so-called cock carousel woman. But I’ve never viewed n-count as a major factor. For one, I’m a huge liability. My n is about 30, and ~1/3 of it is from conventional dating.

If I decide that I don’t want kids, then yes, the optimal strategy is to date sugar babies indefinitely. But that’s because the ~20-30k/yr I spend on sugar babies is a lot less than what I could lose in a second divorce.

RottingAway90 · 2020-09-20T08:46:15+00:00

The AF/BB narrative is really overblown. Most women ime have one or two relationships in their 20s with their looksmatch and end up marrying or moving in together by late 20s. Maybe have a brief “partying” phase in college (just as men the same age do) and stop once the novelty wears off, usually by 22.

Also statistically speaking alphas are still gonna be the ones with money/resources as tall and good-looking men are more likely to be hired and promoted. Women don’t even require resources nowadays like they used to, usually it’s more about seeking companionship, children and intimacy. The same things most men tend to seek out as they get older. Sad fact is both often end up having to “settle”.

Also I know women in their 50s and even 60s who still get action - meaningless sex will never be in short supply for women regardless of how “post wall” we are. I think a lot of men have a scarcity mindset when it comes to sex and therefore have difficulty understanding why a woman would turn down opportunities and assume it must come down to declining availability. Reality is, meaningless sex just doesn’t hold much appeal after a certain point.

wtknight · 2020-09-19T15:43:36+00:00

First, the thing is that "beta bucks" these days often means that one is not completely providing for a woman. Most women these days have jobs, even if the man is the primary breadwinner. And a man can be BB with his wife/partner making just as much money as her, because, unconsciously in her mind, she wants that money that he has for the better lifestyle that she envisions for herself and her children.

Because of women's income, finding a female partner as a BB often means that one is paying less for continual sexual privileges than one would pay a sugar baby for the same thing, as the guy is basically completely subsidizing her expensive lifestyle. Unless that guy is a sexpat and living in a poor country, it's often less expensive to just find a permanent partner, although she will likely be close to that guy's age.

Second, most women do fall at least somewhat in love with the men who they become partners with and eventually marry, even if these guys are BB. This world where a woman is completely mercenary and is only using the BB for his money is a Red Pill fiction, and most guys who are betas do at least have some alpha traits that make them attractive to the woman who they end up with.

By choosing a sugar daddy lifestyle, the guy is resigning himself to a lifestyle where the woman will never be in love with him. Most men do want to experience love and are not so jaded and bitter that they want to use women only for sex for their entire lives.

John_Oakman · 2020-09-19T13:42:14+00:00

The main goal that provider types seek is fulfillment of social obligations and expectations, and often the only way to do so is through marriage and raising a family through his economic and financial resources. Sex/intimacy (real or fake) may or may not be included and are not considered to be critical.

If sex and short term companionship are the only goals then he doesn't have the mentality to be the provider type in the first place.

Sultmaker_9000 · 2020-09-19T14:29:03+00:00

It's a dumb question, because if the provider male had such ability with women and wanted that lifestyle, then he wouldn't be a provider male would he.

DrRainbowBrite · 2020-09-19T18:11:05+00:00

laughs in wealthy single woman

siberiansummer · 2020-09-19T19:31:18+00:00

Harem of young women you say, huh? Knowing a few women who are onto sugar dating I can tell you usually a millionaire can only afford 1-2 sugar babies cause they cost thousands a month. Also, don’t expect exclusivity on their part. One girl I know who does sugaring took a Chad on a cruise with the money she got from her sugar daddies

AutoModerator · 2020-09-19T13:37:40+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

SingleDewd · 2020-09-20T03:53:34+00:00

I was an “alpha” and fucked anyone I came across if I wanted them. Then I did marriage, kids, divorce. Now I make seriously good money and have a military retirement. I’ll never get married again, so there’s that. I still fuck when I get bored, but most of the time I’m doing something else like my hobbies or projects around my paid off house. Yeah, I do get looked at like some kind of retirement plan by a lot of women. They’re cunning little critters, but I learned.

FrustratedBlueberry · 2020-09-19T13:43:07+00:00

How much money is required at a minimum to become a sugar daddy? What if he doesn't hit that income by 30?

alialahmad1997 · 2020-09-19T18:15:44+00:00

Because you assume that all what men want is sex Some of us do like relationships and not every girl in her 30 was a whore in her 20 there are thing called ltr Even if she wasn't single that doesn't mean she isn't going whoring around If you have low n avoid people who take sex lightly and fo one night stands but that doesn't exclude all women And women in their 20 in general aren't intellectually compatible with a 35-40 yo But if all u want is sex go and be a sugar daddy

Mrs_Drgree · 2020-09-19T14:06:20+00:00

[removed]

Maximedius · 2020-09-19T18:28:21+00:00

Yes.

kdtzzz · 2020-09-19T18:51:56+00:00

I already use this strategy but never frame it that way, and I do not think of them as sugar babies I “owe” anything to. Woman don’t just want money, they want to know that they are worth/capable of getting a high value man using his time and sharing resources on them. Try framing it this way: having multiple woman as dating partners that I am non exclusive too and will occasionally create a meaningful memory or spend resources on. Never ever define a relationship with a woman to a woman, even if you already have it defined to yourself. If you tell a woman “hey be my sugar baby” or “I’m not looking for something serious” or “be friends with benefits” it will be the end of it. What you want is to not define it, have your life set up to where she knows your high value, occasionally spend resource and time, then ignore her a little bit and pay attention to the other girls. Then when you finally see her again she’ll be wanting to prove to you she’s worth your time and resources.

Texan2116 · 2020-09-19T19:59:49+00:00

I think a fair amount of BB guys..end up essentially doing this. Once they get the good job, their SMV goes up dramatically. As a matter of fact i dare say, that most of them prbably do employ this to a point.

larueon22s · 2020-09-19T22:46:26+00:00

Omg, please tell me this isn’t me? Well I’m broke, sleep with friends girlfriends on the side, felon so maybe just need to grow up

ashitanothrowaway · 2020-09-20T02:13:13+00:00

The equalizer for sex with women is not money; but sex appeal and skill

I think that men should learn to deal with women while getting our resources together, so that we know what pure lust is like to be able to maintain an approach of biology-first and keep that going to establish being a lover, first, in all romantic relationships with women.

Then, you can avoid being a target by women for your resources unless you are famous and avoid being BB. Being a provider should be a plus to the woman you choose.

If she genuinely desires you sexually and wants a relationship, you aren’t BB.

When you develop your sex appeal, then you can have your choice of whatever age range that you desire from whatever age you are if your game is developed. Pick what you like.

Some men genuinely prefer women in their 30s over 20 year old women, but it should be by choice and not by necessity.

asdf333aza · 2020-09-20T02:15:27+00:00

Marriage is a just a government scam to transfer male wealth to females.

Roachcluster · 2020-09-20T23:16:18+00:00

Provider men, or as I call them - suckers

Sewud · 2020-09-22T15:42:10+00:00

None of the beta males I know ended up settling with a CC riding female. They all ended up with a beta female who was their age but with low n count and usually makes more money than him.

If you end up with a CC riding female it's because you couldn't keep your hypergamy in check and you wanted the hot girl who didn't want you when you were young. You could just marry a slightly more plain woman.

As to why marry instead of fucking around, it's because most men see their priorities change from wanting to duck around when they are 19 to wanting to have a family when they are 25. This is just normal maturity.

If you only exist to have sex and not have kids, do whatever the fuck you want, no one cares, you are a genetic dead end, why are you even talking about your strategy?

HighTMale12 · 2020-09-19T13:43:40+00:00

[deleted]

LooseIndication · 2020-09-20T09:05:39+00:00

This is a total misunderstanding of female nature.

Women do not have personalities. Only dresses.

The same woman can act like the prude at one second, and the whore at the next.

Women do not think "I have this personality", but "this is the character I build to this people", and "this is the character I build to those other".

When a woman faces a man, the question on her mind is "what character should I play on this case?". She expects the man to set the rules. That's what annoys a woman about a man that don't gets it. She doesn't know how to act.

The man that tries to "please her", and gain her approval, is not communicating what woman he wants she to be, what character to dress. What is the cool thing to do.

That's annoys her to no end.

That is why frame is so important. It tells to the woman who she "is". What she has to act to be on the cool side.

AutoModerator · 2020-09-19T13:37:40+00:00

Hi OP,

You've chosen to identify your thread as a CMV. As such you are expected to actively engage in your own thread with a mind open to being changed. PPD has guidelines for what that involves.

OPs author must genuinely hold the position and you must be open to having your view challenged.

An unwillingness to have your view challenged may be inferred from one or several of the following:

Asking few or no genuine questions;

Seeming more interested in arguing or convincing others than understanding opposing views;

Ignoring the main point of a comment, especially to point out some minor inconsistency;

Refusing to make concessions that an alternate view has merit;

Focusing only on the weaker arguments;

Explicit statements of an intent to change the other posters’ minds; or

Only having discussions with users who agree with your position.

Failure to keep to this higher standard (we only apply to CMV OPs) may result in deletion of the whole thread.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

LotBuilder · 2020-09-19T20:40:40+00:00

I’m 42 and divorced and that’s the decision I have made. I can date attractive women within my age range but when you make a certain level of income all dating is sugar dating. So if that’s how it’s going to be you might as well date exactly what you want. For me that’s 21 - 27 year old hard body fitness girls. And yes, they would not have started seeing you without financial incentive but after awhile it feels like a regular relationship on both sides except you get what you want how and when you want it. The girl caters to you rather than the other way around.

Ludens0 · 2020-09-19T19:06:22+00:00

If this were true, the non-retarded and no super ugly provider male could ride the pussy carousel in their 30s with very experienced women. Stop being a neo-priest and go for it.

slavicslothe · 2020-09-20T05:27:16+00:00

Bro my wife is a doctor and not even 30. Idk what century you’re living in but maybe you should try dating people who are doing their own thing in life instead of trying to find a harem 19 y/os looking for a sugar daddy. It makes life a lot more enjoyable and easy when the person you’re with gives a shit about you beyond a paycheck.

Title	CMV: "Provider" males should employ sugar dating strategy by 30s rather than marry women in 30+ range that rode CC
Author	HighTMale12
Upvotes	118
Comments	432
Date	September 19, 2020 1:37 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/ivsoow/cmv_provider_males_should_employ_sugar_dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-provider-males-should-employ-sugar-dating.269861 https://theredarchive.com/post/269861

Comments