My wife told me in March that she was considering separating. That came eight months after gifting me a platinum ring bearing the inscription “no matter where, no matter what” for our 20th anniversary; I had never felt so secure in our relationship in my life.

In August, barely a month after our 21st anniversary, she told me she wanted a divorce.

In November, I learned that she had transferred her cell phone to the plan of a married guy I had suspected her of having an affair with and confronted her about it. Before I did, I confronted him and he admitted that his wife didn’t know about the transfer and then he blocked me on all social media to keep me from telling his wife what I had found out.

Yesterday, my wife served me divorce papers, lining out that she was asking for full control of our kids’ residence and education choices, child support, and spousal support. She’s already going to get half of my military retirement. I’ve been with this woman for 25 years of my 40 years of life. We have five kids together.

I feel like I am literally dying and I wish that I could. How in the world do I ever begin to recover?