Being gaslit and manipulated so much that your SO talking about murdering you doesn’t look like a 🚩

strcrssdvoyager · 2020-12-19T03:46:41+00:00

She's 26 weeks pregnant and he talks about how women die in childbirth? Sounds like he's anticipating her death. I wonder if he's taken out an insurance policy on her 🤔

romantickitty · 2020-12-19T04:07:18+00:00

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jargon_explosion · 2020-12-19T04:37:29+00:00

Just saw a presentation of a homicide case where the killer boyfriend joked about killing his girlfriend and putting her in a body bag by the river. Guess what he did and where he left her body.

This isn't a joke, it's premeditated.

Mella_20 · 2020-12-19T04:18:46+00:00

Of course she has to start it with "we have a great relationship" so that people don't tell her to leave him.

Salty-Tomorrow · 2020-12-19T03:52:01+00:00

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needsmoresilk · 2020-12-19T04:16:25+00:00

Age gap. Wife is pregnant and at most vulnerable. Husband makes oddly specific jokes about how he’d kill wife. Husband traumatizes wife with stories of how women die in childbirth while she is pregnant

Wife asks Reddit of all communities how to get her husband to stop joking. Read that again. She thinks her husband is only joking.

When women are murdered by their male partners and we say “we never saw it coming”....it’s because we’re gaslit into thinking stuff like this is ok.

used-books · 2020-12-19T04:34:42+00:00

This is domestic terrorism, meant to keep her feeling unsafe and walking on eggshells. The message is - you are an object that I own, and can dispose of at will.

It’s well documented that abusers ramp up abuse during pregnancy, after getting married and after moving in together. See Lundy Bancroft’s work.

Think about if a friend, acquaintance or business associate threatened your life- you would immediately cut ties with that person, report the threat and remove them from your life. It’s completely sick that women are conditioned not to have the same response when the threat is from a spouse.

GetUrPeekOn · 2020-12-19T04:13:59+00:00

"My husband wants to murder me but listen, we have a wonderful and loving relationship otherwise. He is perfect in every other way and tells me he loves me whilst digging my grave in our backyard. AITA for feeling weird about this?"

Good lord what is going on with these posts!? I am legitimately afraid for her life.

ivarteefies · 2020-12-19T03:58:59+00:00

When he tells you what he'd do, listen, because he will do it.

whokilledhydra · 2020-12-19T05:07:54+00:00

They met on tinder and his first line to her was "don't worry ha-ha I don't have bodies in my basement sorry I'm bad at this stuff 👉👈"

Serial killer and murder jokes are never ever funny to me.

souredskittles · 2020-12-19T03:30:31+00:00

🚨 age gap 🚨

ComprehensiveAmoeba9 · 2020-12-19T06:57:43+00:00

In the comments she said she has no family and is isolated from her friends due to quarantine. She’s defending her husband because she’s in denial it’s an abusive relationship. I really really hope that she can get the support she needs to leave for both her own and the baby’s sake. The fact that she asked for advice on Reddit is a sign she is starting to realize that something is off. That’s a step in the right direction, and maybe after reading all the comments she will have the resources and clarity to GTFO!

Coconut975 · 2020-12-19T05:16:22+00:00

It was bad enough but as soon as I saw the word pregnant I gasped. No way is that in any way a joke. Who jokes about killing their pregnant wife? Scott Peterson??

Less-Panic · 2020-12-19T05:32:16+00:00

What in the flying fadoodle is going on with the straights

daintybabygirl · 2020-12-19T07:47:49+00:00

I'm noticing a trend. These women always sound the same when defending their evil partners. He's a great guy BUT.. He's wonderful husband/boyfriend BUT

Shinygoldendragonfly · 2020-12-19T03:44:21+00:00

Somewhere ,deep down, this man does not like his wife.

TheOGJammies · 2020-12-19T03:30:31+00:00

9 year age gap I’m shocked 😱

Aocwannabe · 2020-12-19T03:54:43+00:00

Truth in humor 😱😰

MummyCroc · 2020-12-19T07:19:51+00:00

I watch a lot of true crime and I haven't ever fantasised about killing my husband. Sis has to leave asap

pipeuptopipedown · 2020-12-19T08:34:37+00:00

Fortunately pretty much everybody is telling her she's underreacting and she needs to leave him ASAP, posting escape-plan links, etc.

2020-12-19T04:11:26+00:00

how tf did these things become acceptable

Lavender_flow · 2020-12-19T11:07:49+00:00

Also checked out the post. She is just laughing at what people are saying. Many women commented in how their exes would do this and then tried to kill them. She doesn't even care. She is going to end up dead. I this whole situation is insane.

basicbagels · 2020-12-19T03:37:19+00:00

Age gap of course. Also shes married to a psychopath

HottPinkSlug · 2020-12-19T04:24:15+00:00

That 'This Is Forty' movie they were talking about made me want to KILL MYSELF

BabyBlankieieieieie · 2020-12-19T05:15:02+00:00

Get her over here stat. This woman needs help before the inevitable.

spicyspa · 2020-12-19T08:04:23+00:00

That's scary! I watch a lot of true crime and it's mainly just sort of help me prepare for something that might happen to me. I don't watch that for ideas.

mini_baguette · 2020-12-19T07:18:31+00:00

Right away - the age difference.

Unlikely-Marzipan · 2020-12-19T12:45:17+00:00

Holy hell! Nah, sis. There’s a joke, and there’s a “joke”. And when it’s this often it’s a massive fcking red flag parade “joke”. I’m guessing he’s not actually that fantastic a husband, and there’s probably other aspects to this relationship that are emotionally abusive such as him being controlling and manipulative. I’ve had too many abusers with this kind of sense of humour to not take this seriously.

Also, I had two boyfriends who constantly “joked” about me being “a cold hearted bitch” and the other said I was “gutless and had a black heart.” Both “joked” that I didn’t love them because I wasn’t affectionate enough (for some reason I still went into a relationship with them both despite this being in the dating stage 🤡). Anyway, both turned out to be self obsessed, manipulative narcs, who ground me into the ground and constantly nitpicked that I didn’t do enough for them, despite me being the one who did the most in the relationship. My point being - when it’s a consistent joke about the same topic, it’s never really a joke.

idestroythingsfora- · 2020-12-19T13:14:04+00:00

I- she's nine years younger than him. She's heavily pregnant with his child. He talks about murdering her?! She says it's a joke but I don't think she will be saying that when he starts monitoring where she goes and what she does or when he starts getting violent. He's literally threatening her wtf??

allergictoscrotes · 2020-12-19T06:51:17+00:00

I think we should pm this woman and tell her gtfo. No normal person talks like this. If she doesn't leave he WILL kill her if not start physically abusing her. She needs to get out like, yesterday. That gave me chills and I'm not even in that situation

redwineandsolitude · 2020-12-19T10:41:34+00:00

This has Scott Peterson written alllllll over it

2020-12-19T05:38:55+00:00

Damn man I thought it couldn’t get any worse... this girl needs help.

viell · 2020-12-19T12:09:47+00:00

"A little alarming". Yeah no. It's very alarming. I'm also a true crime fan, and never thought about killing anyone.

breadandbunny · 2020-12-19T08:29:12+00:00

What the actual fuck.

Leavix · 2020-12-19T13:50:26+00:00

Oh so now even the sick fucks are considered good guys. Great.

redwineandsolitude · 2020-12-19T14:03:51+00:00

The driving and pointing to where he’d bury her did it to me. RUN 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

RabidWench · 2020-12-19T15:49:10+00:00

The first thing my husband says as I'm reading this out loud is coughLaceyPetersoncough..... and Chris Watts more recently comes to mind.

Girl, this is past redflagland and into RUN BITCH HE'S GONNA MURDER YOU! ARE YOU STUPID?

Lavender_flow · 2020-12-19T10:55:30+00:00

"He is the love of my life. So great and he wants to kill me... he's the best" These fucking pickmes. I fucking can't. She is psychotic as well. Anyone with two functioning braincells would have left this guy sooooo fast. Instead she is having a baby with a psycho.r

FluffandRainclouds · 2020-12-19T13:32:35+00:00

OP deleted her post, but thank goodness there was a comment referring her to DV resources. This is so sad. I hope she is ok 😞

UnstrirringCoffee · 2020-12-19T16:12:39+00:00

He's cheating. This has "The Murderer Next Door" written all over it. He has someone else and wants to get rid of her. I am so worried for her.

sunologie · 2020-12-19T16:11:24+00:00

Jfc, this is disturbing. Also, why is the guy almost a decade older than her? Sick of these age gaps in relationships... anyone think that's a factor that plays into this kind of behavior (the joking about killing you part)?

2020-12-19T16:42:02+00:00

...he wants her dead.

sunologie · 2020-12-19T20:06:56+00:00

Unfortunately it looks like she isn’t listening or willing to face reality, she made 4 different updates / edits to her post saying “guys, it’s not that serious, maybe I worded my post wrong and made it sound too severe...he’s just joking! I know he is!” Sigh.

vacantvivacity · 2020-12-19T17:16:22+00:00

It’s clearly on his mind. And he’s trying to make her comfortable with the idea that it’s just a joke so that she doesn’t see it coming

2020-12-19T19:25:40+00:00

I watched a serial killer doc once and the killer in question would do shit like this to his kids. She needs to run

Striking_Play_1393 · 2020-12-19T19:50:23+00:00

Oh my... I don't even know what to say to that... Oh, wait, nevermind, he is just kidding 😃 What a good sense of humor!

Papaverinum · 2020-12-20T21:05:03+00:00

He doesn't love her and is stuck with her, so he is looking for ways to get rid off her. This poor woman.

My ex sent me a pic of hangman's rope with "insert your head her" text few days before he ghosted me, so talking abour murdering your SO is a clear sign of their lost interest.

Telephonia · 2020-12-20T06:22:14+00:00

Omg I feel so bad for this poor woman!

Imagine being pregnant w some guy’s spawn, and instead of being there to reassure you everything is going to be ok before you are about to embark on this really scary and risky thing, he’s talking about all the women who die during childbirth???

Imagine how unsafe and scared she must be feeling.

It makes me feel sad for her thinking about it. I’m gonna be praying for her tonight. :-(

saggy_lemons1 · 2020-12-20T12:05:58+00:00

She needs to get an abortion...like yesterday. She doesn't need any enemies, she is her own worst enemy.

Title	Being gaslit and manipulated so much that your SO talking about murdering you doesn’t look like a 🚩
Author	jackrussellenergy
Upvotes	300
Comments	104
Date	December 19, 2020 3:29 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/kg0bfy/being_gaslit_and_manipulated_so_much_that_your_so/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/being-gaslit-and-manipulated-so-much-that-your-so.730842 https://theredarchive.com/post/730842

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