If women hit the wall, according to men, would it be in a young woman's best interest to NOT date older men?

operajunkie · 2024-05-09T04:03:50+00:00

The only advantage to dating a way older guy is if a) he has money and b) you don’t mind the possibility he’ll die way sooner and you want to inherit his money as quickly as possible. Think Anna Nicole Smith. Otherwise it increases your chances of being a widow/single mother and/or an early caretaker.

BigZaddyZ3 · 2024-05-08T22:59:25+00:00

According to men…

😳🤦‍♂️… No, according to certain men. I don’t believe that 30 is some type of magical age number where women become old and crusty overnight. Different people decline in terms of looks at different ages. And some women will never hit the wall until they’re like 60 with one foot in the grave lol. Because the truth is, Rihanna’s 36 is hotter than most people’s 21. Women like Rihanna will still be out of most men’s league even at 45 years old.. So the wall is highly exaggerated as a concept tbh.

Whole-Ear2682 · 2024-05-08T23:03:17+00:00

We already don’t? En masse we do not go for them, because they are less attractive than our peers, not cause of what you said. Age gap relationships are not the norm

matten_zero · 2024-05-09T01:32:12+00:00

The "wall" is hyperbole. Women are pretty hot at any age. When we say women hit the wall at 30 what it actually means is:

women are less agreeable at an older age, which increases conflict
women have more "babies rabies" at 30 and start becoming more desperate and basically that hurts their behavior in dating
like red pill ragers, women after 30, unless they are very self aware, will be very jaded and take that out on the men they feel forced to "settle" for
Fertility for women is more irreversible for women at 30. For men it's a matter of testosterone and/or just being healthier. I've heard of no women who get pregnant after 50 which is the opposite for men.
For men, their eligibility for marriage happens after 30 (maturity, stability, wisdom etc).

bloblikeseacreature · 2024-05-08T23:01:36+00:00

it is not. statistically women with older husbands die younger

Dr_Click_Click_Boom · 2024-05-08T23:41:00+00:00

alebruto · 2024-05-08T23:23:23+00:00

I'm trying to understand the relationship between one thing and another.

What does the man's age have to do with this? If the woman hit the wall, then she hit the wall, she is less attractive to any man of any age, whether younger or older.

I wouldn't date a woman with 2 children, one from each parent, even if I were 100 years old.

HighestTierMaslow · 2024-05-08T22:56:32+00:00

Men will say an older man who snags a woman that young won't ditch her when she grows up because she "stuck with him and created memories " Their mental gymnastics for getting things to suit them is amusing 🍿

truth-informant · 2024-05-09T00:47:19+00:00

I'm in my 30s and I wouldn't date a girl in her 20s because it's very unlikely we'd have anything in common. A drunken one night stand at best, if that. Maybe there's one outlier who is an "old soul" and more mature than the rest in her age group. But that's talking about unicorns.

Date someone who fits you at that particular time in your life. Stop worrying about what other people say you should be doing.

honeypot42077 · 2024-05-09T04:22:55+00:00

This isn't a very coherent question in the first place.

Not all women hit the wall, just the ones with poor judgement.

Only men that arnt attracted to the older and poor decision making women would have reason to say she hit the wall.

Its in all women's best interest to date whomever theyre attracted to.

Your question is annoying and chaotic because you're making wayyyy too many pre-suppositions

fucksiclepizza · 2024-05-08T23:44:56+00:00

The wall isn't a thing.

GojosLowerHalf3 · 2024-05-08T23:17:58+00:00

You are so sweet for thinking those men put actual thought into things they say lol

ilike18yoblackpussy · 2024-05-09T00:13:26+00:00

What does this have to do with older men in particular? Most men don't suddenly abandon their spouses or gfs at 12 am on the day that she turns 30. That's just not how men operate.

The truth is younger women are generally more physically attractive to a large proportion of men than older women are. So when it comes to initial attraction, younger women have an advantage.

However, in the context of a long-term relationship, I think physical attraction becomes less important and liking someone as a person and being compatible becomes more important. That's probably why most men don't just suddenly leave their wives or gfs as soon as she gets her first wrinkle or gray hair.

So women who are already in happy relationships don't tend to have to worry so much about their bfs or husbands suddenly leaving them because they reached a certain age.

However, for older women who are single, they may find fewer dating options than they had when they were younger if they're on the market.

There are older men who specifically prefer women their own age to much younger women, and there are younger men who prefer older women. But, on average, younger women get more attention for men their own age and older men than older women do. And that is probably why some older women are disgruntled.

Suitable-Ad-8598 · 2024-05-09T03:37:39+00:00

I think the concept going on here is that there are far less (attractive/suitable) single people as you age, and women typically date men older than them and vice versa of course. This concept is enforced by men and women. Women don't typically date men younger than them, and men don't typically date women older than them.

The reality is, 40 might be like the latest you have reasonably get married and have kids as a woman. It might take 5 years to comfortably arrive in that spot from being completely single, so I think that's where the 35 came from.

Expensive-Tea455 · 2024-05-10T01:13:59+00:00

I wouldn’t date an old man unless he was super rich, otherwise there’s really no incentive to date some grandpa 🤷🏽‍♀️

Bekiala · 2024-05-08T23:13:59+00:00

I would think very few men are like this and some who think this way are just super young themselves.

It is a point for women dating when they are older as then you are a self-screening system as men who think this way stay away from you.

John_Oakman · 2024-05-08T23:50:53+00:00

The wall only exists if you* care about the opinions of [the based and redpilled real men of the manosphere], and those [particular] older men keep on yelling those hateful speech if you* put them higher on the social totem pole for doing so.

But you* will do those things despite logic & reasoning, because they are eliciting a response bore out of the baser nature of humans. Overcoming that baser nature is the difficult part.

*generic 2nd person usage of the word

backstabber81 · 2024-05-09T15:45:12+00:00

Haven't you read the memo? Nowadays women hit the wall at 25. I was literally told yesterday that if by 25 a woman wasn't married or in a marriage-worthy relationship, she was already late since quality men would be going after younger women.

LapazGracie · 2024-05-08T22:32:09+00:00

The real wall doesn't happen till about 40-45. That's when women become infertile due to old age.

The only reason people say 30-35 is probably because by that age a large % of women are overweight and insufferable. If a 35 year old takes good care of herself she is still very capable of finding plenty of interest from men.

Regarding dating an older man. That's not how it works at all. Humans pair bond just like many other creatures on this planet. We call it "love" and many other names. Once that happens. Looks matter much less. You have to be good looking for a man to love you in many cases. But once he loves you he's in it for the long haul. ESPECIALLY once you guys have kids. So I wouldn't worry too much about that one. Nature already sorted it out for you a long long time ago.

Choice-Substance-183 · 2024-05-08T22:38:59+00:00

The wall doesn't exist.

And yes, it's not in a woman's best interest to date older men.

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Saucy_Moist · 2024-05-09T05:00:30+00:00

I don't think women "hit a wall" per say, but I think it gets harder for a few reasons.

You're competing with more women. At 21, you're probably competing with women between 18-22. At 30, you're probably competing with women anywhere from 23-35. Following these numbers you PROBABLY have 3x more competition.
Male libido is lower. If we're assuming you want a man your age, men's sex drives are lower than in their year 20s. This meaning the way you look has less of an impact on whether a man will choose you than when you were younger. In your 20s the pull the way your physical attractiveness has on men in their 20s is probably insane. Compare this to men and women in their 30s and this is PROBABLY much less likely the case.
This is going to sound offensive, but from an outside perspective as a man, there are questions to be asked as to why you're 30 and still single. Women have a lot more "power" in a relationship as far as if the man is up to her standards, he's more replaceable than she is (generally speaking I think this is true). If by the time you're 30 you STILL haven't locked a guy down or had most of that time be long term relationships, there are things a man's head runs to. Was she just casual in her relationships and NOW wants to get serious? Is there something wrong with her personality wise if she's already 30 and hasn't locked a guy down? Is it because she's too "independent" (this is not as attractive as people think, you don't get in relationships because you want to be independent or be with someone who is)? I think this last point isn't all that strong for a big part of why it's harder, but I think it's maybe in the back of some men's minds, which unfortunate for women who these assumptions aren't true for.

This all to say yeah, it's not ALL about looks. I don't think men get in relationships with women and once they hit 30 (unless they are Leo and its 25 not 30) they look for a new woman. I think men prefer not to start new relationships with women over 30.

2024-05-15T17:35:13+00:00

I don’t think women “hit a wall”. My wife is 10 years younger. I’d say just got date a man who thinks that way. It’s kind of fucked. Older men can be more established so raising a family could be financially easier. Older men can be more mature and realistic in their thinking, which might make them garner more respect people in general, which in turn can make them more attractive.

From a man’s perspective, I was shock at how jaded women in their 30’s were. Many genuine kinds gestures were met with suspicion, rather than gratitude. I would have married someone my age, but I met someone younger that loves and appreciates me. I thought meeting someone who had dated around and been hurt before would appreciate someone really trying, but that just wasn’t my personal experience. I’m sure some would have, but I met someone younger first.

Lepapunca · 2024-10-05T00:32:00+00:00

Lol..I’m a woman in her 50’s and a lot of women in my age group don’t want to date older men, they want younger men. So, a lot of men over 60 have a hard time finding women their age. Maybe that’s why they go for much younger. I guess a lot of people, men and women over 50 want to date younger.😊🤷‍♀️

Lenovo_Driver · 2024-05-08T22:42:25+00:00

If you try to make logic out of the nonsense red pilled guys say you’ll end up as dumb and lacking of social skills as they are.

The wall isn’t real

Ultramega39 · 2024-05-08T22:40:52+00:00

According to men all women hit the wall and become ugly and useless by age 30.

And who exactly said this?

I mean, I'd be perfectly okay if woman didn't want to date older men. Part of the reason why so many young men are single is because a lot of younger women are dating older men.

FreitasAlan · 2024-05-08T23:10:16+00:00

That’s the worst argument I’ve seen about anything this year. Assuming there’s a strong wall at 30 that makes you worthless (I don’t think there is, I don’t even think red pill guys say that in this sense of worthless, but it’s your assumption in the hypothesis) you’d be less valuable to both younger and older men (again, assuming that’s a problem) so that can’t be the criterion. At best, it would make no difference. At worst, you would lose value precisely when the guy is most likely to leave you by dating younger men. Again, there’s no such strong wall and men also have a “wall” at least when they have some health problems at 40. The concept of wall also depends on your goals: if you don’t want kids there’s no wall ever. It makes no difference whether you’re fertile.

TheDerInDisorder · 2024-05-09T01:11:07+00:00

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I'll knock the cobwebs out the rafters, so I don't judge anyone.

Alternative_Poem445 · 2024-05-09T02:40:28+00:00

its not that women become ugly and useless at 35, its that past the age of 35 pregnancies are at a much higher risk, and some even consider it irresponsible to knowingly have children who will not only have greater health risks as a fetus, but as a newborn and through adulthood. fertility starts dropping dramatically.

Necessary-Ask-3619 · 2024-05-09T07:36:17+00:00

Nobody has said you become ugly and useless by age 30.

Hitting the wall means you aged and are not someone I would want to START a life with. But if I started a life with you when you were younger, you will still remain beautiful and valuable to me as a partner.

SlowEffective8146 · 2024-05-08T22:55:29+00:00

It doesn't matter what age you date, just do it before you hit the wall if you want the best odds for yourself

ThrowawayHomesch · 2024-05-08T23:46:44+00:00

The wall only matters when forming a NEW relationship. Not keeping an existing relationship.

If a woman decided to date me when she is young and attractive, I’m not gonna break up with her when she is older because she got wrinkles or stretch marks from pregnancy. That’s a shitty thing to do to someone who gave you their best years.

If a guy abandons his wife just because she is aging, that makes him a terrible person and he should be called out for it

UnhappyInevitable680 · 2024-05-08T23:10:01+00:00

Women’s “Sexual marketplace Value” not “human or society value” is determined by her beauty and many other things like personality BUT beauty is the main value. Overtime that value diminishes. Men get old too, but that’s not what we are primarily valued for in the sexual marketplace. Young pretty women in there 20’s have the most beauty and VALUE in the marketplace, hence people like livvy dunne who are famous for being pretty essentially. These women have a LOT of options speedballed in there face and it makes settling down very difficult because you are choosing 1 person over INFINITY people, which include the best of the best men. As you get older you lose your sexual marketplace value from your physical beauty being diminished and you’re fertility window closing. This can make women hit a WALL when they are trying to obtain the best of the best men still and they can’t so they start to panic and make bitter tiktoks about how men suck at committing. High value men will NEVER commit. High value alpha men who have constant infinite options treat women like food. Why chose to only eat one food when you have the choice of a buffet, a buffet which also includes the food YOU are offering. And this all applies in the same way at different levels of attraction for women.

motheaas · 2024-05-09T00:44:42+00:00

Men fall in love over time. After a certain period, they will stay with you no matter what

shonenhikada · 2024-05-09T03:42:52+00:00

No and here is why. A woman's youth and fertility is one of her biggest gift/bargaining tool that she has when trying to bargain a LTR with a man. Relationships usually have a non-spoken social agreement where both parties obtain what they want from each other. On the most basic level, this often boils down to women wanting men to provide and protect them, and men wanting women to bare him healthy children, and provide him with consistent sex exclusively (which indirectly means not having kids with other men).

A woman who presents later in life to a man is often short changing said guy when it comes to providing him the opportunity to start a big family. Couple this with her increase likelihood of accumulating emotional and mental trauma from failed relationships, possibly having kids from past relationship, and her having a higher incidence of cheating and the marriage failing due to her likely having a higher body count, and you will see why older women aren't providing a great deal for older men.

This is why we often see the memes of a guy getting rejected or friendzone in his youth by a girl, and a decade later, when the woman looks worse and possibility has a kid from another guy, she ends up rejected by the guy she friendzone when she reaches out to him. Him rejecting her is partially out of spite for being rejected in the past, but it is also due to him realizing that this woman still does not respect him, and is low key telling him that his worth in dating is this version of her that she now presents to him.

Lastly, in an ideal world, women should focus on men their age that show potential, and lock them down early into a romantic relationship. The loyalty of being with this man when he has nothing + shared emotional trauma as you work together to overcome life's struggles, will likely make said man see more in you than any young girl. Sadly, a lot of women today do not do that. They either date already established guys or squander their youth on guys out of their league, that just want to have casual fun with them, and then years later will shift gear to give towards men that would actually commit to them.

chocobolamo · 2024-05-09T07:13:46+00:00

To me it seems like a waste of time and energy to even date men who care about youth above all else.

why are you assuming that this is the case?

). So what is the benefit of dating an older man as a young woman if we hit the wall, and is no longer valuable to them once we hit a certain age?

Because younger women have less baggage. They are still fun and agreeable. Once women become older and further from where they think they should be in life (kids, wedding, etc) they become more dysregulated and more difficult to deal with. As they have more shitty experiences with men reliving their inherited family trauma they have more and more trauma which is exhausting. Men are attracted to fun and agreeable, not cold and bitchy.

You can snag a younger woman without this baggage and protect her from getting it with you. This is called #winning life.

According to men all women hit the wall and become ugly and useless by age 30

According to whom? acknowledging the wall does not mean women are ugly and useless. It acknowledges that women are valued for their beauty (and men are valued for how handsome they are).

In general men age better than women. This is not even remotely negotiable. Go look at the golden bachelor and then look at half the hags there.

Lastly, its the women going after the older men as well and en masse. They aren't attracted to some broke 24 year old socially awkward dude who hasn't built his island yet.

icixnik4 · 2024-05-09T00:22:44+00:00

The reasoning is that compared to younger men, older men usually have more of everything that women desire in men like status, confidence, money experience etc.

berichorbeburied · 2024-05-08T23:04:51+00:00

Honestly it would be better for you (hypothetical women who is young) to date an older man.

Why?

Because if he’s old. By the time you get old. He is less likely to leave you. Less likely to have the energy and horniness to cheat. Less likely to try to find another woman who is young and beautiful.

This is my theory on why older men - Younger women couples work.

Also an older man is going to make the younger woman his focus. He’s going to put in the effort of spoiling/providing. Or at least trying to entertain. He will try harder on average (not all)

For whatever reason. Younger men on average (not all) do not want to commit or give their full investment and time into one woman for the rest of their lives.

And older men on average (not all) do.

I’ve seen people site the age differences are 4 years in relationships.

You have to understand averages.

If not every relationship is 3-4 years exactly.

Then what does that mean?

It means some relationships are above 3-4 years and some relationships are below 3-4 years.

And that’s how you get an average.

For example

7 (year age difference relationship) + 1 (year age difference relationship) = 8 (total year age difference in a relationship)

8 (total year age difference in a relationship) / 2 (total relationships = 4 (year average of the 2 total relationships)

Just as an example of how the average can be 4 and still have many big age gap relationships.

Also the fact that it’s still above means that women are selecting older men on average in general.

I think the lowest women typically go is the same age. But that’s just personal experience. And that I rarely see a woman in a committed relationship with a younger man.

I’m curious on how big or small the average age gaps are in elderly couples that have been together for 10+ to 20+ years or more.

TLDR. It would be better for a younger woman to date an older man by your logic. As that older man by necessity. Will show more effort and prioritize your life to his. And is more likely to show or pursue commitment. And by the time you age out of whatever attractive is. By that time. He will be less able (physically or options or mentally) or willing to find/pursue another young hot woman.

Based on your logical reasoning.

Because men objectively see beauty the same way (not all) on average.

But then again majority of men settle (imo). So I mean you can do whatever you want.

You seem to be talking/leaning to the op post being about committed relationships/commitment and not casual sex.

So that’s what my response is based on. Coming forth from that thought process reasoning.

Zabadoodude · 2024-05-09T00:24:02+00:00

First of all most men don't think women hit a magical wall at 30. Its a fringe opinion, even on here. There's plenty of attractive women in their 30's that do very well with men. But, yes, on average women in their 20's look better than in their 30's, and they look better in their 30's than in their 40's.

Both younger and older men think younger women look better, so whether you go for younger or older men, this will still be true. If you're in a committed relationship, a man isn't going to stop being attracted to you just because you got a little older. Ubfortunately, everyone's looks fade with age. Men aren't immune from this either, though they usually peak a little later.

superlurkage · 2024-05-09T16:34:20+00:00

Who cares about what’s in young women’s best interest. Desirable objects should be possessed, not free

If women hit the wall, according to men, would it be in a young woman's best interest to NOT date older men?

Comments

The example is an example. It’s a dramatic example of why men want younger women. There are more minor examples as well, like a guy who criticizes a woman’s family.

Title	If women hit the wall, according to men, would it be in a young woman's best interest to NOT date older men?
Author	VickiLynnRose
Upvotes	1
Comments	215
Date	May 8, 2024 10:28 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1cnheh6/if_women_hit_the_wall_according_to_men_would_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-women-hit-the-wall-according-to-men-would-it-be.1517926 https://theredarchive.com/post/1517926