Q4M: Thoughts on this advice for young women?

ComfortableJeans · 2025-10-28T02:14:59+00:00

Personally, I wouldn't be interested in a partner who's kept me on the back burner while they slept around. Something about that feels disrespectful and... I don't know, just, bad.

If I were to find out that my partner did that to me, I'd likely just end the relationship. Something about being kept in place until someone is ready having sex with other people is very off putting.

I also wouldn't really be interested in a partner who has a proclivity toward that kind of behavior.

As for the advice, I mean... Lying to, manipulating and deliberately misleading a partner is a good way of getting them to do what you want, but it's really something only bad people are going to be able to do.

In the same sense that certain men lie about what they are, and their true desires and intentions with a woman in order to manipulate her into doing what he wants, the same principle also works for women lying to men about what they are and what they want.

So, it is good advice, if you're a bad person. Which a lot of people are.

As for this kind of behavior, it's always seemed to me that it's not something you get out of your system, but actually something you get into your system.

Of all the boys and girls I've known who went out of their way to sleep around as much as possible while we were young, now as an early thirties guy, those same boys I hung out with are cheating all the time, treating their partners badly and always prowling for more women, even when they've got a wife and kids at home.

The same is generally true for the girls I knew, also. Off and on relationships. Having kids because they hoped it would bring stability, which it hasn't seemed to and so on.

It is good advice, if you're a bad person who wants to use people in order to get what you want.

It's bad advice if you're the kind of person who wants a genuine and loving relationship where you can truly be yourself and comfortable with the person you love, because your relationship will always be built on manipulation and lies.

You can never be truly connected with someone on the deepest levels if you're not truthful with them, and you can't be truthful with them if you're misleading them.

So, yeah. It depends what you want, and what you are a person.

For what it's worth, though. The majority of people are pretty anti-this kind of behavior. Both men and women.

Global study found that willingness to consider someone as a long-term partner dropped sharply as past partner numbers increased. The effect was strongest between 4 and 12. There was no evidence of a sexual double standard.

Which mostly stays in line with the findings on partner count between genders.

Median partners is around 4-5 for women, and 6-7 for men, by age 50. According to the CDC, anyway.

So, there's not really much need to worry about falling for someone who's treated you this way, generally. But of course, you should always be mindful of someone taking advantage of you.

TrumpFucksKidz · 2025-10-28T10:50:29+00:00

This is excellent advice, assuming the following things are true:

"Good men" will be available when these women are done having their fun.
Those "Good men" will be excited to date/marry the kind of women who rejected them in their younger years.
There won't be younger women who are interested in getting married and having children instead of experimenting.

Unfortunately, none of those things are true.

Kreeps_United · 2025-10-28T06:07:38+00:00

Um... this advice is basically telling young women to be the stereotype redpillers spread about young women.

Steakman1 · 2025-10-28T03:32:57+00:00

She’s basically just telling women what red pillers tell men.

Personally, if women want to hook up with a few guys before getting married, whatever. Not the type of woman I’d be interested in. But plenty of decent guys wouldn’t really care. A bit different from whay she’s saying though.

However, the reality is that the older you date, the less quality is going to be there because more of the quality will already be partnered off. Men in this regard at least have the advantage of naturally wanting to date women younger than them (generally). Women on the other hand, as they get older, will have to either accept the leftovers as they get older, where any good quality guy is going to be a lot more competed for, or somehow get over their natural desires of wanting to date men a little older than them.

Last, she is essentially telling women to settle. Because she’s telling women to go for men later on that she wasn’t interested in when she was younger. Which means those guys had some sort of flaw in her eyes. Although I don’t think really anyone will end up with their 100% ideal perfect partner, I’m not sure why any woman would take the advice of basically “hook up with the guys you’re attracted to and then settle for a guy who you’re not very attracted to but who will treat you right.” To me it seems like the women who would go for this advice are the ones jaded from trying to date bad men.

ConstipatedAvocado · 2025-10-28T08:30:13+00:00

The advice is bad for the same reason redpill advice to men is bad (and much of the dating advice aimed at gen Zers these days), it precludes you being very attractive and desirable...most people are not.

Sure, I've literally seen women play the field and settle with a guy who "waited for them". I literally had an ex tell me thats exactly what she planned to do. Thing is though, when I actually had a look to see what those men were like, it was obvious the women in question was "settling" for someone she probably wouldnt have taken as seriously if she had better options.

Its like a thread I read here yesterday about men not having to be nice because attractiveness gets them further than being nice could. I mean, yeah, thats all well and good but the chances of you being attractive enough to offset an awful personality are slim as all hell. And you're in a market full of 6ft+ fit dudes who are actually better adjusted than they've ever been. I looked at some yougov data yesterday and was shocked at how many young men had very balanced views on things like feminism, gender equality and LGBT rights.

Equally, just as there are many women looking to live their "city girl" life, there are many who are also not., One thing a lot of women really underestimate is just how much their relationship market value absolutely tanks as they approach 30. Yeah you'll find a relationship. Finding one with a decent earning, well adjusted, physically attractive dude whilst being a former slut? Good luck. Unless you're very good looking, of course we know most women are not.

SeemedGood · 2025-10-28T02:06:15+00:00

Proof that misery loves company.

Strudelhund · 2025-10-28T11:05:49+00:00

It's a risky play with low chances of success. More and more men know about this and won't be "stoked to talk to you". Trying to keep your options open to find the best one turns into a competition with every woman with the same strategy. And most will find out that the competition is fierce. If you're a top few percent woman it may work out, otherwise your options will dwindle over time.

gtbreddit1 · 2025-10-28T02:45:57+00:00

I think it's ragebait. She's overtly affirming one of the most popular manospherian narratives about women and doing it with a smirk.

wonka___vision · 2025-10-28T02:45:25+00:00

Settle down with the back up plan after you are infected with herpes, HPV and who knows what else. Great advise!

By the way... men know when they are the back up plan. A self respecting man won't put up with it.

kvakerok_v2 · 2025-10-28T03:41:20+00:00

then when you are READY to settle down, "spin the block" on the good dudes so to speak. They'll be stoked to talk to you.

The advice is inherently bad because your experiences change you.

First, women that have been around the block think "the good dudes" are boring. They give no pussy tingles to women that got used to acting on pussy tingles.

Second, "the good dudes", who don't know any better will be stoked to talk to her until they find out she's been riding that cock carousel. Some kind soul will stick to bro code and forward them the clip of her blowing some random guy in a club bathroom or running a train on herself during one of her "experiments".

Third, experimenting women eventually discover the mythical good cock, while the overwhelmingly vast majority of men simply don't know how to fuck. These women can never go back to bad cock of "the good guys" 🤷🏽‍♂️

Artistic_Speech_1965 · 2025-10-28T07:01:20+00:00

It's more of a comedy videos with exagerations but it display the truth that young men (especially those nowadays) want sex and will want a relationship mainly to secure sex (nothing serious). I won't recommand to bang that much since it's not something healthy for people in the long run

Tbh if a I knew in college slide in my dm or contact me, I would be suspicious of her agenda

Downtown_Werewolf_44 · 2025-10-28T07:18:57+00:00

Lying about your sexual past? Women does that all the time...

Problem is I don't see how it's possible to keep it a secret indefinitely, situation will occures, friends will slip some hints during some drunk nights... The day he knows, the relationship is probably over.

Be promiscuous if you want to, just assume the consequences of your past choices and date men/women who are ok with that. Leave men/women who don't want any of this alone.

Kingcrow33 · 2025-10-28T12:09:07+00:00

Very bad advice. A good man is not going to wait around for you. Let's pretend he doesn't care about you sleeping around. He is going to have offers from other women. So he is going to choose those offers. No reason to wait.

Fancy-Scallion-6682 · 2025-10-28T18:36:01+00:00

Yeah no, this is a nightmare for men for various reasons.

One big one is because she thinks that good men would be stoked because she's giving them the opportunity. As if she's a queen who is now deigning to go talk to the peasantry. No thanks.

And secondly because again she's telling women that they can have fun with one set of guys and settle down with another. But the guys who she wants to settle down with also want to be seen as fun and exciting and masculine and not just a good dad or a good husband.

I think this is something women need to understand. Yes men are desperate to be chosen by women, but it's not enough to be chosen. Why she choses you also matters. A man want to be chosen because she thinks that he's hot and funny and sexy. Not because he's dependable and honest and kind. For men, being chosen for being hot and sexy is validating. Being chosen for being kind and dependable is not.

Windmill_flowers · 2025-10-28T02:06:37+00:00

get a stable career first then date whoever

USPSHoudini · 2025-10-28T04:15:26+00:00

As long as you dont lie to those men about sleeping around and having sex with animals, good luck and go for it

If you lie about it because you want to manipulate a guy into a relationship, I view you as nothing more than a rapist. Rape by deception where your specific form of deception is knowing omission. Any argument of "oh I didnt think you would care" is another lie and you are insulting his intelligence to try and get away with your original lie and you having a rapist mentality of "I will get what I want by any means necessary"

Having sex with animals is fucking strange though

Environmental_Day558 · 2025-10-28T02:19:38+00:00

So we gon act like this mf didn't really just say bang dogs 😐

Anyway this is typical red pill advice I'd hear fresh and fit give to men. Members of the opposite gender ain't shit so sleep around as much as you can in your 20s and when you done hoeing around, look for that good one.

growframe · 2025-10-28T10:19:46+00:00

I don't know what definition of "highest quality man" wouldn't require the self-respect to not accept being put on the backburner.

Otherwise, it's obviously ragebait. If someone follows it and ends up happy, then good for them. If they follow it and it makes them miserable, then oh well. Usually, any dating strategy that involves biding your time has the disadvantage of a shrinking pool, though.

Kingcrow33 · 2025-10-28T12:33:35+00:00

What about her advice to women on sucking your man's dick to get him to help around the house?

84JPG · 2025-10-28T18:48:26+00:00

I think that the sleep around/don’t sleep around advice and internet debate is a bit moot. My experience is that the overwhelming majority of women are wired to be into it or not - no in between. Those who are, aren’t going to be swayed by conservative advice or culture and those who are not won’t be by these types of people.

Be it as it may, I don’t think the advice is good. While there’re plenty of good men willing to marry a woman with a promiscuous past (unless you were a literal sex worker), the bigger problem is age in my opinion. If you spend your early and mid 20’s in casual relationships, by your late 20’s when you’re looking for something serious, most attractive men such as those you kept on the “back burner” are more likely to already be in serious long term relationships if not married. This advice assumes that the woman in question is so attractive that she can just swoop whenever she pleases and the man she desires will just be waiting for her.

N_Count_Council · 2025-10-28T18:59:15+00:00

She's making a joke, obviously

Why is humor so non-existent on PPD?

CybernewtonDS · 2025-10-28T20:12:43+00:00

then when you are READY to settle down, "spin the block" on the good dues so to speak.

I would tell any young woman who's only interested in me after she's "had her fun" to fuck off. I can fuck an escort who actually knows what she's doing as opposed to some woman who will do what the Youtuber above suggests and then complain in the same breath how inexperienced I am.

James_M_Croft · 2025-10-28T22:23:38+00:00

Thats just AFBB. Standard women behavior.

Capital_Capsicum · 2025-10-29T07:18:56+00:00

First of all, this is definitely rage bait. But let's address the principle regardless.

Despite what a lot of women, and especially young women, might think, most men aren't dumb cavemen desperate for a touch of boob. Most men know that women can be toxic and manipulative, and know when they're getting manipulated. There are also plenty of actually nice women out there.

GrandpaDallas · 2025-10-29T15:08:45+00:00

Why add the disclaimer when you're only asking about our individual opinions about specific advice that has been given?

It's like you're asking a group of people "Hey, do you like fancy restaurants? BY THE WAY NOT ALL WOMEN! NOT ALL MEN!!@"

Ok_Use7 · 2025-10-28T02:44:25+00:00

This is how I was taught. I don't see any issues at all.

then when you are READY to settle down, "spin the block" on the good dudes so to speak.

Big believer in this.

OffTheRedSand · 2025-10-28T02:12:28+00:00

i feel like the way she worded it is what makes it sound so wrong but in reality that's how most people date

you date around and you hook up a couple of times then you find someone you truly vibe with and you get married/in a realtionship with them even if they don't look like your fav pornstar.

reality is you can always find someone hotter but you can't always replicate the chemisty you have with someone.

also most men would take this strategy 100% if given the chance in fact they already do with so many me claiming average women are dating chads, maybe it's just chad settling with a nice stable girl since he had his fun with stacy lol

Reasonable_Mouse789 · 2025-10-28T02:18:22+00:00

Be an amazing, good looking, intelligent person. I could give advice on any aspects of how to do that if someone has a specific question in mind

PassengerCultural421 · 2025-10-28T02:43:20+00:00

I don't care what young women do.

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wtknight · 2025-10-28T03:27:14+00:00

The advice is fine for the most part. Most men only care that their future partner was not more promiscuous than he was. The hate towards promiscuous women in the west is mostly either from sexually unsuccessful men, rare men who just don't like casual sex in general and don't want to engage in it themselves, or men from traditional cultures or who are really into their religion. The hate is not from the typical sexually successful western man. I don't personally like casual sex myself and think that people should be having less of it, but I don't think that having it in moderation hurts a woman's future relationship chances with men.

-Kalos · 2025-10-28T07:41:19+00:00

I mean this is what young people in general should do. General life advice. You should find out what you like and don't like before getting married, it's not gender specific advice. Or else you end up in marriages where you hate each other like boomers did

Lift_and_Lurk · 2025-10-28T13:29:04+00:00

I’ve never seen a single “if I’m still single by X age actually ever get to X age and get together”

Girl almost always finds a guy. Guy almost always gets a girl who wants to be with him way before.

leefjk · 2025-10-28T18:42:19+00:00

Is the person in the video Jewish by chance?

Clean-Luck6428 · 2025-10-28T02:08:10+00:00

I do think that hookup culture needs a jump start

The kids are not having enough sex clearly. Zoomers take themselves too seriously and think they hold the knowledge to have a successful relationship when they are really just wasting time they could be gaining experience so they can have real skills for a relationship.

Q4M: Thoughts on this advice for young women?

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Title	Q4M: Thoughts on this advice for young women?
Author	Windmill_flowers
Upvotes	4
Comments	155
Date	October 28, 2025 1:58 AM UTC (8 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ohxcfg/q4m_thoughts_on_this_advice_for_young_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4m-thoughts-on-this-advice-for-young-women.1565177 https://theredarchive.com/post/1565177