Ex radical feminist speaking up after his transition to being male

BeneficialBlock · 2018-08-22T13:28:35+00:00

Image text
Coast Guard veteran. Works at Naval Medical Center San Diego as a clinical social work case manager. Editor of anthologies about transgender men. Started transition in 2005.
Prior to my transition, I was an outspoken radical feminist. I P spoke up often, loudly and with conﬁdence. I was encouraged to speak up. I was given awards for my efforts, literally — it was like, “Oh, yeah, speak up, speak out.” When I speak up now, I am often given the direct or indirect message that I am “mansplaining,” “taking up too much space” or “asserting my white male heterosexual privilege.” Never mind that I am a ﬁrst—generation Mexican American, a transsexual man, and married to the same woman I was with prior to my transition.
I ﬁnd the assertion that I am now unable to speak out on issues I ﬁnd important offensive and I refuse to allow anyone to silence me. My ability to empathize has grown exponentially, because I now factor men into my thinking and feeling about situations. Prior to my transition, I rarely considered how men experienced life or what they thought, muted or liked about their lives. I have learned so much about the lives of men through my friendships with men, reading books and articles by and for men and through the men I serve as a licensed clinical social worker.

Meyright · 2018-08-21T12:57:43+00:00

An other very relatable part:

What continues to strike me is the significant reduction in friendliness and kindness now extended to me in public spaces. It now feels as though I am on my own: No one, outside of family and close friends, is paying any attention to my well-being.

I can recall a moment where this difference hit home. A couple of years into my medical gender transition, I was traveling on a public bus early one weekend morning. There were six people on the bus, including me. One was a woman. She was talking on a mobile phone very loudly and remarked that “men are such a–holes.” I immediately looked up at her and then around at the other men. Not one had lifted his head to look at the woman or anyone else. The woman saw me look at her and then commented to the person she was speaking with about “some a–hole on the bus right now looking at me.” I was stunned, because I recall being in similar situations, but in the reverse, many times: A man would say or do something deemed obnoxious or offensive, and I would find solidarity with the women around me as we made eye contact, rolled our eyes and maybe even commented out loud on the situation. I’m not sure I understand why the men did not respond, but it made a lasting impression on me.

Vandechoz · 2018-08-21T15:35:23+00:00

After being on testosterone, they informed me that my listening skills weren’t what they used to be. Here’s an example: I’m driving with one of my best friends, Beth, and I ask her “Is your sister meeting us for dinner?” Ten minutes later she’s still talking and I still have no idea if her sister is coming. So finally, I couldn’t take it anymore, and I snapped and said, “IS SHE COMING OR NOT?” And Beth was like, “You know, you used to like hearing all the backstory and how I’d get around to the answer.

This is hilarious.

Meyright · 2018-08-21T12:46:48+00:00

Source: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/local/wp/2018/07/20/feature/crossing-the-divide-do-men-really-have-it-easier-these-transgender-guys-found-the-truth-was-more-complex/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.675e4410783a

Edit: It's very sad, that it does need people who have been women once for the WP to emphasize on the reality in which men live.

Tedesche · 2018-08-21T14:06:44+00:00

For someone who identified as a man their entire life, I find the lack of empathy for men a bit confusing. This sounds to me more like a person who was a male feminist in the sense that they subscribed to sexist feminist ideas about men, and were completely fine with that until they started being subject to them themselves. It's also interesting that this self-identified man wasn't treated this way prior to their transition.

dvali · 2018-08-21T16:53:46+00:00

Wait, were you a licensed clinical social worker for men pre transition, i.e. during the time that you openly admit you didn't care about their experience of life? Hope not.

Also, any sort of hint of an apology for being a total shit stick before it affected you personally would have been nice.

2018-08-21T13:05:02+00:00

How is that male privilege working.

Goatsandducks · 2018-08-21T16:51:20+00:00

This bugs me so much as a woman as I would never wish for anyone to feel guilty for their gender.

Some woman thing it’s okay to make these comments without realising men do feel the same emotions as they do. I would hate to go through what men typically have to.

Don’t start me on the fact men tend not to share what’s on their mind and how they feel. It’s no wonder when society’s view on a man should be someone who is tough and hard, that men have the highest rate of suicide.

Why is it okay for a woman to use the term mansplaining yet get offended when a sexist comment is directed towards them?

I for one will always stick up for any man who I believe is being victimised because of their gender. It’s cruel. Any form of sexism toward a man or a woman is cruel Imo.

BlueOrange22 · 2018-08-21T17:26:58+00:00

Feminists notions such as "mansplaining" are tactics of psychological manipulation, and debate tactics to derail and throw someone off. It's not a legitimate concept, and it's also completely hypocritical- they say men shouldn't speak over the lived experiences of women, or about how feminism should "actually be." Ok, fair enough...but then they do exactly that when they criticize the men's rights movement, and tell us how men's issues "actually" are and what the "right" way to address it is. They say men shouldn't be able to form their own group for themselves.

red_philosopher · 2018-08-21T12:52:34+00:00

The lack of remorse is what gets to me the most. At least they understand now?

cankle_h8r · 2018-08-21T15:48:12+00:00

"I refuse to allow anyone to silence me." Men are silenced by women and the media and we end up having to allow it. It's the way society is. Men have to shut up while getting accused of mansplaining as a shaming tactic. It works. Society needs to change and there should be equal rights and opportunities for both genders.

Random_throwaway_000 · 2018-08-21T15:56:40+00:00

Level of foresight: 0

BlueZir · 2018-08-21T13:40:41+00:00

I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of the cognitive dissonance that drives transitions to being a transgender woman is created by the desire to be more accepted and loved by society. If you denounce being a man you're celebrated as progressive and brought into a society of social warriors that will run around with you on their shoulders.

Do the opposite, and you're denouncing the feminist community and get treated like a traitor to humanity, like all the other men.

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2018-08-22T02:24:41+00:00

The bit about how, as a woman and feminist, she never considered men's feelings really says it all.

skwishy29 · 2018-08-21T18:54:40+00:00

Just saying I’ve heard things that were the opposite too. People who have become women who face new problems. Both sexes have problems. Obviously this person is being silenced because he is with feminists not just because he’s now a man (I don’t get silenced on the streets but I would at a feminist rally)

Surtysurt · 2018-08-22T02:23:12+00:00

My number one issue with women is the outburst mentality. Parents need to do a better job of raising girls to communicate better. Men are raised knowing some topics like age and weight are going to upset women. Women don't get told if you argue you shouldn't attack the person's character. Women expect men to change into someone that listens to long boring stories but not to shorten them. My tone is not the issue, you going up 5 octaves because you think there may be an issue is the issue.

BoyeAusMinga · 2018-08-21T20:40:22+00:00

The fact that a radical feminist was allowed to be a social worker is a joke.

chambertlo · 2018-08-22T01:27:52+00:00

So, the only way she began to care about men is by becoming one? This is bullshit, 101. If it takes you to mutilate your body and literally change your sex just to give a shit about the gender you aren’t, you have already failed.

Trans men are not real men and will never understand the difficulties of being a real man.

Dizzik_ · 2018-08-22T00:53:46+00:00

But she's not a man. She's still a woman pretending to be a man

Fulk0 · 2018-08-21T15:43:38+00:00

What really seems crazy about this to me is that people change their sex before getting to know how the opposite sex has it. It's like going to live to a country you know nothing about. What if you reconsider things? It's not like you can endlessly change your sex. I've got nothing against this, but I feel like there should be more professional control over it.

Headsup1958 · 2018-08-21T21:39:23+00:00

I’ll hold a door open for anyone behind me as I go through it. Most say thanks and the ones who don’t, well you know who they are and I’ve been known to call out, ‘your welcome’ or ‘it’s called manners!’ just to embarrass them.

I had a recent experience in a grocery store parking lot I’ll share. When I head to the store, I typically take an abandoned cart or one from the cart corral. As I was passing by a 40ish woman (I’m M60, white, Progressive/Liberal) she was done loading her car from her cart. I said, ‘Can I take the cart for you’? She said loudly, ‘NO’! So I head off to the cart corral to get one with her right behind. As I get mine, she pushes hers in and walks off in a huff and her nose in the air. Oh well, I’m used to that treatment now from some women. I’ll still ask the next man or woman tho as I WAS raised with manners.

1LegendaryWombat · 2018-08-21T22:56:35+00:00

Yep, because the only thing that matters is if you have a penis(and are therefore a horrible evil person who cannot be trusted with anything) and are masculine looking(which drives you to be unemotional and oppressive to women).

Thats exactly right though, it doesn't matter who or what you are, if you're a man, suddenly everything is your fault, despite reality. It sucks that in 2018 we have this kind of bullshit and its so widespread.

SupremeIsMe · 2018-08-21T23:08:16+00:00

W E L C O M E

coolrulez555 · 2018-08-22T04:40:23+00:00

Our movement is growing. More people are growing away. I have noticed multiple transgendered individuals in thus comment section, and they are not spewing sjw nonsense! (No offense)

Zero_Life_Left · 2018-08-22T05:26:27+00:00

How does a raging feminist want to become a man? That boggles the mind.

aJazzyFeel · 2018-08-22T07:16:53+00:00

It's almost like men are people too, how curious. /s

Blutarg · 2018-08-22T15:05:42+00:00

This is a person with integrity. They were exposed to new facts, so they altered their viewpoint.

Archangel1313 · 2018-08-21T20:12:43+00:00

Your a man now...shut up and just deal with it. ;)

corkteaser · 2018-08-21T15:19:04+00:00

From the pics, the majority of these men aren't passing - there isn't one I can tell wasn't a woman before. Their social experience is different than both typical men and women.

202700000000 · 2018-08-21T13:43:40+00:00

"I didn't have empathy before, but now I feel bad... for myself."

K.

devilsadvocate09 · 2018-08-21T21:51:46+00:00

I am not trying to be an asshole, seriously, is this a man transitioning to a woman or woman transitioning to man?

bigmantomm · 2018-08-23T02:58:18+00:00

Dude redpilled himself

DarthTyekanik · 2018-08-21T22:37:05+00:00

Stupid woman

jrogz5 · 2018-08-21T16:31:56+00:00

A person with mental illness is a clinical social worker? Yikes

PeruvianRug · 2018-08-21T16:24:19+00:00

I've got no beef with transmen since they're not impactful in any harmful way. They're around and in very small numbers doing their own thing.

Reading this makes my eyes roll into the back of my skull. No, buddy, you are not a man. You are a woman on HRT who would give that up in a split second if faced with a draft, jail time or any other severe repercussion for being a man. You are as much a man as an Irish guy taking melanin injections is black. Be whoever you want to be and live that life, but for the love of god don't think you're speaking on our behalf or understand us because you took T for a few years.

Onion_Guy · 2018-08-21T16:54:36+00:00

his

2018-08-21T18:58:47+00:00

Is this from a book or article?

candidly1 · 2018-08-21T23:32:18+00:00

These movements always end up destroying themselves, as all of its proponents fight over who is most pure. This one is no different...

marcooni1 · 2018-08-22T13:20:08+00:00

Well it is almost always like that, People change theire minds if it happens to them.

svenskbitch · 2018-08-22T15:20:50+00:00

Now that we are becoming more and more tolerant of transsexualism (term intended as inclusive), we should have a treasure trove of voices like this to inform the debate.

I could only find three. Two - this one and Norah (not a transsexual, but a lesbian who lived as a man) - come to conclusions that most of us here would agree with. One seems to bend over backward to come to the opposite, stretching quite a bit to do so through mostly omission and some exaggeration (but I invite others to watch this video and comment on why in the world a reasonable person that has switched genders could think this way):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrYx7HaUlMY&t=624s

The key for me was her admission that she had never thought in any depth about how men experience life. THAT alone explains so much of why MRA and feminists - or the majority of them that are truly committed to gender equality - can come to such radically different conclusions.

zanderkeig · 2018-08-26T17:05:46+00:00

Hello, I am Zander Keig, the subject of the portion (there were 4 stories total) of a Washington Post article shared in this sub Reddit community. I am working with the Mods to set-up an AMA. I look forward to reading and responding to your questions and comments.

2018-08-22T02:49:44+00:00

this might be useful to deflect a leftist narrative temporarily, but trannyism for the most part is a vehicle of the anti-MRM left

herkandjerk · 2018-08-22T21:53:08+00:00

In other words: “that a affects me now, waaah”

canuckpuckbeaut · 2018-08-21T15:07:27+00:00

Justice fuckin served

2018-08-22T02:47:28+00:00

Okay these whiteknights and cucks knew what they were doing when they virtue signalled for the non existent chance at a pussy. Now they got burned, and suddenly they are outspoken MRAs?!

One thing for sure, cucks and whiteknights get what they deserve (not a pussy BTW).

Caronte87 · 2018-08-22T09:16:11+00:00

It's a tranny, not a man.

ThePigmanAgain · 2018-08-22T10:24:25+00:00

No such thing as transitioning to being male. This person is still a woman, albeit a rather weird one. Stop swallowing the tranny Kool-Aid, guys.

Title	Ex radical feminist speaking up after his transition to being male
Author	Meyright
Upvotes	2477
Comments	282
Date	August 21, 2018 12:45 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/992tlt/ex_radical_feminist_speaking_up_after_his/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/ex-radical-feminist-speaking-up-after-his.895777 https://theredarchive.com/post/895777

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