Do alpha males ever regret not settling down when they get old?

YveisGrey · 2024-03-26T13:30:09+00:00

I don’t think many alpha guys avoid settling down tbh. They usually just get married and cheat. They probably regret the subsequent divorce from their philandering. But in the case that they do refuse to settle down yea they probably regret it there definitely comes a point when they are just old can’t attract women as anything more than a sugar daddy.

Legitimate_Type_1324 · 2024-03-26T12:31:05+00:00

Everyone hits the wall eventually.

I'm going to guess that yes, many will regret way before they get too old.

Only a few are horny and pervy enough to continue wanting women into the old age. Most men eventually get tired of the chase and want to relax.

I'm ten times happier married with a baby on the way than chasing women. Testosterone is a stressful hormone. Being domesticated brings a lot of peace.

Creation_Soul · 2024-03-26T12:16:13+00:00

The correct answer (as with a lot of other questions) is depends.

I have talked about this before, but I have a cousin who is very successful on tinder and once (drunkenly) admitted that he envies me and my relationship to my wife and that we can keep the relationship going for so long. He is basically addicted to the adrenalin and energy of a new relationship and once those wear off, the relationship quickly falls apart.

purplish_possum · 2024-03-26T13:16:23+00:00

OP's premise is misguided. The vast majority of hot guys settle down when they find someone they think is special. They tell woman after woman that they're not ready to be married. Then -- when they find a woman who stands out from the crowd -- they're engaged within a month and married before the end of the year.

JSears90210 · 2024-03-26T13:42:19+00:00

Outside of two guys I know every single guy settled down at some point. Some well into their 40s. Most every guy reaches a point where he wants a LTR. If you are a well off, intelligent and still handsome guy you will have a lot of options.

Christian_Kong · 2024-03-26T13:51:21+00:00

I would imagine those that don't time it right do have some regret but still do fine with women. They just don't get to marry that 10 of 10 perfect woman that they had the chance to settle with. They settle for the 8 of 10, with minimal regret.

Most of the chaddish folks I knew settled with the right one and just cheated afterwards and I wouldn't be surprised if that is fairly common.

Makuta_Servaela · 2024-03-26T14:44:05+00:00

Pretty much any decision you can make younger you can regret older.

I used to work with old people. Some of the ones who married or didn't marry regretted it and some didn't. Some of the ones who had kids or didn't have kids regretted it, and some didn't. Man or woman, doesn't really make a difference.

reddit_is_geh · 2024-03-26T12:45:38+00:00

I dunno if I'd say I'm an "alpha male" but I was really successful with women, had money, travelled, etc... but not like one of those guys really really killing it in life and lead a large social circle. I was more solo but like I said, I definitely had success with women.

I'll say I do regret not settling down sooner. After mid 30s, you realize the good women are mostly gone. Some guys just remain being fuckbois, but I always wanted a family and now it's kind of "left overs". Lots of party girls remaining, single moms, weird, gold diggers, etc... The smart ones latch down late 20s.

YveisGrey · 2024-03-26T13:24:59+00:00

I think such men are able to and happy to settle down after a certain age. Even if it’s not with the hottest woman they are still content with it. Such men probably regret hurting others if anything. I guess if something really bad happens like he loses all his money and is fat and bald he might feel sad and lonely if he can’t attract even a semi decent woman. Yea in that case he may get real depressed

Safinated · 2024-03-26T14:21:22+00:00

The answer to all your overgeneralizations is “yes, that can happen”

swuidgle · 2024-03-26T14:57:35+00:00

I've met men with fading looks who used to be a looker and they do seem a bit lonely. I hope people can find community and connection whether or not they find a romantic relationship.

No-Rough-7390 · 2024-03-26T12:45:42+00:00

I think there’s the myth of the lonely old man vs a guy that had an awful marriage, got divorced, and is now loving being alone, single, and at peace in their 40s and 50s. I play golf with these guys all the time and they do not desire to get married again in slightest.

If a guy wants to use RP methods to achieve BP goals, then yes what you said will undoubtedly happen.

But what I’ve found was (and this was the case for me) “getting it out of your system” is a very real thing for guys. At a certain point after dating and being with enough women, I was content with it and knew what I would and wouldn’t tolerate out of a relationship. Women have told me this before, but to some degree their ideal is a player type that made up his own mind to shift to something different.

I guess it really depends though.

penelopeofusa · 2024-03-26T14:33:50+00:00

Yes from what I see the forever single with lots of options or divorced & popular among the ladies “alpha” has a timeframe. It’s around 50-60 years old & by then they are unicorn hunting.

MyLastBestChance · 2024-03-26T12:31:30+00:00

Those are the 40 something mulleted, beer bellied guys with unrealistically yellow hair making fools of themselves at college bars and trying to relive their days of scoring touchdowns at Polk High.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-03-26T13:33:09+00:00

The real question is “who are the so called Alpha Males that you even know, let alone the ones that didn’t settle down?”

Because o think you’ll find most people will say “that isn’t a thing and so it doesn’t exists”

Green-Quantity1032 · 2024-03-26T14:03:14+00:00

“Alpha” is kind of a stupid word, so I’ll just refer to “sexually successful”.

Like women - if you fail to get off the fun wagon on time you’re gonna have some less than ideal times.

Unless he just doesn’t want a serious partner ever, in which case it’s w/e.

But obviously a 50y/o is gonna have less fun dating than 28y/o by a large margin, even if quantity wise he can get more

HomeworkFew2187 · 2024-03-26T15:07:31+00:00

this people who spins all these plates. will either not settle down. or get a ltr and then cheat on their partner until they get divorced.And then do it all again.

Flightlessbirbz · 2024-03-26T17:30:29+00:00

Everyone has a “wall” but that doesn’t really mean what some people think it does. I don’t know of anyone male or female who used to be successful and now can’t find anyone decent to date/marry, even if they got kinda older and fat. They might not be able to get the amount or quality of people they used to, but they’re never single.

MidoriEgg · 2024-03-26T17:35:23+00:00

Worked with a guy who was nearing 60 and definitely loved that type of lifestyle, he was still good looking. Seemed to pull mostly women in early middle age. He used to stay late at work all the time because he didn’t really have much to go home to he said, he did get married but it didn’t last very long. But I’m not sure if someone with his personality would of been fufilled in or well suited to a ltr anyway, so maybe this was the best life for him.

David-Metty · 2024-03-26T20:40:28+00:00

Who knows? There aren’t any human alpha males…

Nearby-Bunch-1860 · 2024-03-28T01:51:02+00:00

I've fucked like 40-70 women probably, and yes I do regret not settling down with one of the better ones while the dating pool was much larger for me, it feels like the "good ones" are much fewer and far between now.

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The_Forgotten001 · 2024-03-26T13:35:49+00:00

Considering the STD rates in elderly homes, I would guess... Yes.

This is assuming he saved enough to retire to an elderly home.

SoPolitico · 2024-03-26T14:47:19+00:00

No because most of them do they just wait until they’re good and ready. Also, they typically get to settle down with an extremely desirable woman.

Willow-girl · 2024-03-26T16:17:06+00:00

Lucius Atherton did.

Overarching_Chaos · 2024-03-27T01:29:47+00:00

My uncle is 70 now and used to be a gigachad in his youth. Everyone I know speaks about how much "pussy" he's had. Now he is alone and one of the things he has admitted only to me is that he should have settled down with one of the "good women he dated". You're not going to be high testo, fit and young forever.

Youngrazzy · 2024-03-27T01:31:32+00:00

This is a silly post most alpha males have a main woman and a bunch of side women.

NickTesla2018 · 2024-03-27T01:47:17+00:00

Have a friend who is a certified Chad. Tall, fit, wealthy, tattoos. Women throw themselves at him daily. He says he wants to settle down, but we both know he'll never be able to give up the chase of fresh young tail. It's like a drug. And he's seriously addicted.

Hard_Thruster · 2024-03-27T05:55:27+00:00

This is such a childish question.

"Alpha" males aren't guys who sleep around and not settle. They're actually guys who have the potential to sleep around.

There is a difference.

Most guys I know still want marriage and are very monogamous, some are also being better looking (and successful) than the guys who do well on the apps or hookup culture.

headphone-candy · 2024-03-27T09:54:31+00:00

I’ve never married but have lived with 8 different women, dated hundreds, and now just enjoy having fun with whatever variety comes along which so far they still do.

These days if you have some personality, confidence, intelligence, stay in halfway decent shape/high T, have a sense of humor and know how to show women a good time you can keep pulling lots of different women well into later life.

At this point that is preferable to settling down and involving the state in my affairs. Get snipped if you don’t want kids. If a miracle level connection comes along I’d explore it but once you’ve been burnt hard core a few times that seems like a poor odds bet. It’s hard to take relationships seriously in 2024 given how much I’ve seen.

DannyBOI_LE · 2024-03-27T17:56:34+00:00

Beware any dude who refers to themselves as "alpha" lol. Besides a few peter panners or guys with defective personality traits (undateable) a good majority of guys have actually attempted to settle down either in marriage or LTR, only to find a far more peaceful existence being single. This truth many women often don't want to hear, but a lot of independent men who've had experience in relationships find it far less difficult rolling solo.

MattPayneWrestler · 2024-03-27T19:39:33+00:00

Why can’t he get with her anymore? Shes old too! If he locked her down young she would still get old and lose value. He can just go lock her down whenever cause she gets old along with him😆. Now if he wants to be old but lock down a young girl, then that might be tuff, but if it aint happening he can always go settle down with one of the chicks he used to bang who is now old. So he never has to regret.

Kagenikakushiteru · 2024-04-14T01:49:34+00:00

A true alpha male spends his time growing his career and empire, and spends time with parents. Who cares about chicks. I’ve had like 50+ of them last few years and how has my life improved now? But my $2m property that’s gone to $5m, and my recent $4m purchase, now that’s something. Last thing I need to be is a gym goer with lots of girlfriends and no money at 35

wolfloveyes · 2024-03-26T12:29:11+00:00

Do they regret it? Yes. But they also understand it's a fantasy, and settling with a woman is not easy and may not even be what they imagine.

Most of us grow up seeing women as "better than us." This is the reason behind the "Women are wonderful" Effect. Traditionally, society held women to much higher standards than men, so there was some merit there, at least in the public eye.

Yet most experienced men who dealt with women understood female nature.

Men can spend a decade planning a war. Men can work for a decade for a corporate takeover. But women are different. You can't work on women; they exist one moment and don't exist the next moment.

The nature of women is transient; there's no stability there. The more unstable a man is, the less women focus on themselves and try to control the unstable man. The whole ordeal to fix such a man helps them forget their own unstable emotional state. That's the reason you find a lot of women pining for criminals, alcoholics, drug addicts, etc.

Women aren't loyal to anyone.

Even the girl who loves you the most right now may one day hate you.

Many alpha's girlfriends sleep with other dudes on the side. Women aren't loyal to alphas; it's not in their nature.

There is some weird "notion" in the male mind that if he does the right thing, maintains the right frame, he can keep a woman loyal. Loyalty depends on her state of mind, not your actions.

It's the movies that make males delusional about women, where a woman will scream "I'd rather die than sleep with the villain," and then commit suicide.

In real life, you'll never find such a woman. She would gladly sleep with your arch-rival if he successfully manages to overpower you or just because you aren't there and she's getting attention from him.

So an alpha man sees life as a series of events taking place; he doesn't align the events for things to happen, not with women atleast.

This is why ancient scriptures and religious book tell you to have a higher purpose. The idea is that the higher purpose has more chance of being successful than your desire to have stable life with a woman of your choice.

Alpha male need to sacrifice women in front of bigger purpose in life.

He just goes on with life, fucks one girl in the morning, another in the evening.

One of them will be crazy enough to have his kids. Then he becomes a dad.

Then he goes on to fuck more; he doesn't care much about anyone, not even himself.

Women see this as "strength".

Icy-Variation795 · 2024-03-26T15:39:35+00:00

What makes someone an alpha male? The term is a bit confusing. What are the goals of these people? Do they actually even have goals? I guess status seeking or whatever will never fully be achieved so at least they will always have that as a never ending thing to work towards, who knows

campskills21 · 2024-03-26T15:43:48+00:00

Never married alpha guys have a lot more fun than regular guys who settle down. I know a bunch of guys who are in their 40s they just love picking up girls and sleeping with multiple girls a week, it’s in their blood.

They know it how much fun stuff they’ve done comparatively living life just on their rules. I don’t think they do most of the time, that’s what they know, they weren’t interested in a wife and kids. Clock never runs out in guys either, guy can settle down and have a kid whenever.

shonenhikada · 2024-03-26T12:12:49+00:00

Dan Bilzerian may be considered an alpha male by some. He is rich, in good shape and slept with 1000s of women. In the video, he says sleeping with 2 girls a day was a particularly low number for him and the highest number of girls he bangs in a single day was like 9. He made a video recently of how after beddings tons of girls, he would have preferred settling down early with just 1 cool girl that he could trust and be monogamous with early on.

https://twitter.com/BritMartinez/status/1769733811409912060

Now, does this mean he regrets sleeping with most of these women? No. It gave him validation of being wanted, confidence and skills in the bedroom that any future partner can appreciate. So yes, there are some alpha males that stay on dating market for too long then regret not settling down. Also a lot of alpha males, even after they have a main girl cheat on her from time to time with other women.

Crash-Panda · 2024-03-26T12:17:25+00:00

Men have a wall too, as men age they get wrinkly and fatter unless they really take good care of themselves. And let's be honest if you are on Purple Pill Debate you most likely don't. The TradCon approach is far superior. Find one woman to meet, settle down and have kids.

PeterWritesEmails · 2024-03-26T14:06:05+00:00

If they are experiencing 'the wall' it means they are no longer 'alpha' (whatever this means).

Throwwaway4970 · 2024-03-26T14:08:40+00:00

Key is knowing when you should lock a young and beautiful woman down.

one_time_animal · 2024-03-26T14:42:19+00:00

I imagine if you're a low SES alpha male you probably start hitting the wall in your mid 40s, and sooner if you get fat

Even if you're a low SES 20-35 yo alpha male, high SES women can treat you like men treat women - I e. Sex but they won't get into a relationship with

AngeCruelle · 2024-03-26T15:39:43+00:00

The closest example in my own family had a wife when he was young. He fully acknowledges she was a saint of a woman while he was immature and took her for granted. Not making her the villain and genuinely owning up to what he did makes him more respectable in my eyes than a lot of stereotypical alpha males.

That said, he has zero interest in getting married again. He dates multiple women, often at the same time, and is always open about the fact that he's not interested in commitment. His one regret is not doing right by his ex-wife. He doesn't regret his choice to give up on having serious romantic relationships after that.

Most-Imagination8673 · 2024-03-26T14:15:38+00:00

When he's ready to 'settle down', he'll simply do so with a younger girl in her prime who'll love what he has to offer 🤷🏻‍♂️

MyHouseOnMars- · 2024-03-26T15:06:50+00:00

I think "alpha males" are just guys with attachment issues and if they manage to be in a relationship they will cheat

hydro908 · 2024-03-26T16:20:42+00:00

As long as they have money and stay fit they will be fine

Excellent_Badger123 · 2024-03-26T16:21:06+00:00

They aren’t exactly “alpha” dudes but even passport bros fold at some point, generally around 55-60 after sampling many women. They find the 25-30 year old “one” and settle down to become late age fathers. Money is the key component in these relationships though.

TheRedPillRipper · 2024-03-26T22:22:17+00:00

they can just keep getting many women

This is entirely anecdotal, but my father is in this category. I think he’s on his 5th(probably more) partner, post divorce. This one actually got him to buy a new house(after only 7 months). It is not a lifestyle I envy. Nor would envision for my son.

Ultimately getting old, and the quality of life one has into old age, is entirely dependent upon the relationships one fosters through life. My old man isn’t a bad guy. Just selfish. That reflects in his relationships. My mother conversely is ‘a giver.’ She’s surrounded by others. Not just family, but community. People love her. Staying with her. Always inviting her out. Events. Parties. This reflects the relationships she’s invested in.

Humans are social creatures. We need each other. Giving. Caring. Are fundamental to this end. Focusing more upon what brings us together, as opposed to the differences that separate.

boom-wham-slam · 2024-03-26T13:48:19+00:00

I don't think so? And why wouldn't we settle down? In part I don't settle because I have a moral framework that a top value woman is hot submissive young and a virgin and I've had that before so in my mind I'll just keep working to better myself and meet women until I get it again. Anything less means I have given up. It's not settling down to stop training for a gold medal it's failure and giving up. I'm not someone who gives up.

DarayRaven · 2024-03-26T13:37:05+00:00

When it comes to alpha males who don't want to settle down and keep getting all the women for sex, do they ever have a wall one day they will regret not being able to lock down a high SMV woman he could have had when he was younger that he could not get at an older age?

The wall only applies to women

Also do yourself a favor, and stop using this pronouns

Title	Do alpha males ever regret not settling down when they get old?
Author	harmonica2
Upvotes	31
Comments	163
Date	March 26, 2024 11:47 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1bo5vwu/do_alpha_males_ever_regret_not_settling_down_when/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-alpha-males-ever-regret-not-settling-down-when.1513270 https://theredarchive.com/post/1513270

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