Feminists could do well, if they develop humility

ComfortableJeansGuy · 2026-06-21T01:53:43+00:00

The issue is that the term Feminist is so nebulous that it's nearly unusable now.

Feminist spans everything from people who want true, unyielding equality between the sexes, to those women who used to post "All men should die." online, accompanied by a selfie of themselves holding a Male Tear mug.

I'm in a position where I simultaneously agree with Feminism entirely, and reject it at the same time.

There are lots of Feminist that've come to the conclusion that the next step forward in improving things for women, is to soften gender related demands of men and a relaxing of the system by which we value men, in order to allow them to move things forward in a more progressive way for both genders, as they've realised that you can't leave one behind and expect to move the other forward, as we're inexplicably linked.

There are others that believe that the only way forward for women is to revel in the male suicide rate, to deride and scorn them at every turn and to create a gender segregated society.

To say Feminists should show humility tars with far to wide of a brush.

But they're also caught in a position where the latter example is far more vocal, receives far more attention and therefore appears to be a larger aspect of the movement, driving more and more people away from wanting to be identified as a feminist.

The misandristic and man hating rhetoric is just what earns the most clicks, both in posting and reacting to, and are beliefs held by the most repugnant of the group.

I personally don't identify as a feminist despite basically being 1:1 with what the majority of feminists would claim to believe, because I know the assumptions people would make about a man who identifies that way. Not because of the majority, but because people assume you're the worst that a group has to offer.

As with a lot of movements, or groups these days, their PR has been trashed by the algorithms.

TheKindlyPoltergeist · 2026-06-21T01:39:21+00:00

I most issues with dateing and gender rights would be vastly better if both genders stoped thinking they were psychic about the other gender and just straight up asked what was going on. Empathy is the solution to alot of life's problem. If you want to know why some guys are cheating jerks to there girlfriends ask a man we will tell you. If your wondering why you can't get a date as man ask a woman for honesty advice and she will tell you.

Major-Platypus2092 · 2026-06-21T01:39:47+00:00

Well nothing about this post supports your assertion that you "support feminist movements," but let's say for argument's sake that you do. Which ones?

Because I'm a decently far leftist and while I find plenty of people with similar politics pretty annoying, it's never once swayed me off what I believe. So do you really support feminist movements or do you only support women's rights when they're being nice to you?

Downtown_Cat_1745 · 2026-06-21T02:36:08+00:00

I think feminists are doing just fine. Women are graduating college at higher rates than men and are less likely to experience domestic violence than they were in the past.

It sounds like you’re angry that women are putting themselves first rather than thinking about men first

IcyTrapezium · 2026-06-21T01:47:27+00:00

Which feminist trends are you talking about? What feminist theory have you read? If by feminist trends you mean random women with no published works bitching about men they’ve dated on TikTok, I’d suggest engaging with serious feminist thinkers.

While I agree being annoying or abrasive can be offputting to otherwise swayable people, it often makes no difference. Trump could suddenly develop humility and his policies would still be revolting to the same people who voted against him.

KoninginVanRotterdam · 2026-06-21T01:40:20+00:00

This is like meat eaters saying that if vegans were nicer to them they would go vegan. 😂

Its a bullshit argument.

Expensive_Lion1807 · 2026-06-21T01:48:41+00:00

Which men’s issues are you referring to, specifically?

fiftypoundpuppy · 2026-06-21T01:52:54+00:00

Women being nice to men, women being "humble," women being smiley submissive agreeable doormats, women going along to get along, women censoring ourselves, women behaving exactly as men demand has never made men treat us better or "support our issues"

As history very clearly demonstrates

Outside_Memory5703 · 2026-06-21T03:04:23+00:00

The only way men will be happy is if we fuck and serve them when we don’t want to. There’s no way to prettify or make that humble

PuzzleheadedRow9896 · 2026-06-21T03:22:28+00:00

I'm someone that believes in old school men's rights.

But I gotta admit, I get why feminists don't hold much space for men. I have to imagine it's somewhat like being an African Child Soldier listening to say an upper middle class white kid complain that his parents are getting divorced. Except if the white kid complaining was also from generations of African Warlords that create and terrorize child soldiers.

Like, some of this goes back to when you lose privilege it feels like oppression conversations. And complaining about men's mental health while women still regularly face exploitation and abuse regularly most men's problems can't hold a candle to.

Yes, I do think they'd be better off not sneering at men's rights...but I do understand where the urge comes from.

sammyb1122 · 2026-06-21T01:53:02+00:00

Not all feminists are nasty to men. Some are. But many manosphere men are nasty about women. Same as the left and right of politics.

So you are expecting something of other groups that your own group (male rights activists) haven't achieved.

I suggest you encourage ALL people to be nicer and more tolerant, rather than just one sub group. You actually have more influence over your fellow men.

PositionStandard6089 · 2026-06-21T16:28:28+00:00

which feminists? where? what generation?

what feminist creators are you talking about? which ones are being "snobbish"?

a superiority complex means you actually think you're less-than and inadequate and overcompensate. is that what you meant? because it doesn't sound like it.

"All the misandristic and man hating rhetoric has consumed most of the current feminist trends."

can you please give a specific example?

"The hatred can potentially undermine the entire cause of it."

this is far from a new thought. women's movements have been warned for generations that they are taking things too far and might risk alienating male allies. but the real male allies are not so easily scared away.

Content_Concert_2555 · 2026-06-21T20:20:46+00:00

Men were always going to push back the more they lost social status of being “above” women. Andrew Tate was inevitable.

Hrquestiob · 2026-06-22T05:00:42+00:00

I consider myself a feminist, but the word has lost all meaning. Just because I support equality does not mean I automatically want men to fail or women to be superior. Honestly, almost not worth discussing with anyone because the terms have lost all meaning.

Present-Afternoon-70 · 2026-06-21T05:10:21+00:00

"Feminists need humility" is a strange criticism when a huge portion of the modern men's movement consists of telling women that feminism ruined society, women are hypergamous, divorce should be harder, and traditional gender roles should return.

Much of what gets called "misandry" is simply women describing experiences that men don't share. The "man vs. bear" discourse wasn't women saying men are literally worse than bears; it was women recognizing a shared feeling of vulnerability. Men often interpreted it literally because they weren't the intended audience.

The idea that feminists should simply be nicer is fundamentally broken. Goodwill is not an unlimited resource, and many conservatives and men's rights activists have spent decades opposing women's equality, reproductive autonomy, and broader social progress. At some point, people stop believing they are engaged in a good-faith disagreement.

There is no moral obligation to endlessly and politely explain your humanity to people who are actively supporting restrictions on your rights. Social movements are not required to comfort the people resisting them.

operation-spot · 2026-06-21T02:53:11+00:00

What are you considering a superiority complex or snobbish behavior?

A woman rejecting or not seeking a relationship isn't snobbery, it's free will. Feminism is alive and well even if you don't like it and that's okay.

Shrimptank_mom · 2026-06-21T04:05:02+00:00

Feminism is doing fine. Women are succeeding by leaps and bounds. Even countries that are traditionally patriarchal are making progress. Women have collectively figured out that we don't need to appease men, we don't need to limit ourselves, and we don't need to be humble. All human beings need to be in order to progress, be they male or female, is to be kind to one another.

Solondthewookiee · 2026-06-21T06:01:14+00:00

All the misandristic and man hating rhetoric has consumed most of the current feminist trends

Like what?

AutoModerator · 2026-06-21T01:33:02+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "Debate" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

AutoModerator · 2026-06-21T01:33:02+00:00

Hi OP,

You've chosen to identify your thread as a Debate. As such you are expected to actively engage in your own thread with a mind open to being changed. PPD has guidelines for what that involves.

OPs author must genuinely hold the position and you must be open to having your view challenged.

An unwillingness to debate in good faith may be inferred from one or several of the following:

Ignoring the main point of a comment, especially to point out some minor inconsistency;

Refusing to make concessions that an alternate view has merit;

Focusing only on the weaker arguments;

Only having discussions with users who agree with your position.

Failure to keep to this higher standard (we only apply to Debate OPs) may result in deletion of the whole thread.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

the_scar_when_you_go · 2026-06-22T16:18:10+00:00

misandristic and man hating rhetoric

I don't think the avg man knows what those things are. Just bc Todd said that quoting violence stats is misandry doesn't mean it is.

selfishstars · 2026-06-24T02:03:42+00:00

Really good points!

No_Switch384 · 2026-06-21T10:57:22+00:00

i was talking about this a couple weeks ago

any movement that wants to be taking seriously must purge itself of extremist

when you have self proclaimed “feminist” saying things like “abort all male babies” and celebrating male suicide

its going to tarnish the image of the group even if its a small minority of people doing it

wouldbepandananny · 2026-06-21T18:43:31+00:00

Now tell feminists that we aren't sufficiently "grateful." 🙃

PageVanDamme · 2026-06-21T21:21:49+00:00

Can't have 99.9% of people develop class unity

Street_Jacket_2667 · 2026-06-21T03:13:19+00:00

I will never take feminism seriously as an ideology as long as the "kill all men" cunts exist with in it.

Stunning-Spirit5275 · 2026-06-21T11:19:10+00:00

From the suffragettes calling men dogs, to Andrea dworkin gleefully describing murdering men with high heeled shoes, to Valerie solanis gendercide, to sally miller gearhardts advocacy of male population reduction. Prejudice towards men is INHERENT to feminism. Asking them for empathy and humility when it comes to men's issues, or any issues that don't grant women privilege, power and reservation are a waste of time

love_in_october · 2026-06-21T08:36:52+00:00

That would work just fine if anti-feminists weren't in the practice of disingenuously bringing up "men's issues" to fuel backlash.

oneandonlysealoftime · 2026-06-22T09:08:19+00:00

This argument exists since the first days of feminism.

Women are the group oppressed by men.

There are also issues, that men have obviously, but they are caused by being oppressed by other men: the mental health crises due to pressure to be emotionless and strong, the obligation to die in a war etc

Now think, why would a woman go as far as to start claiming herself to be a misandrist?
Most of my friends don't event claim they're feminists anymore, they despise feminism for playing too much with men's fragile egos.

And the reason for that is that it makes them safer.

Men in feminism often try to perverse the whole idea feminism to a "fight for equality", while in reality it's fight for women's rights. This perversion makes things like women-only spaces, ban of prostitution, women-only programs controversial. And in the end again, women lose, because men whined about being treated unfairly (after several ages of femicide)

il_nascosto · 2026-06-22T07:41:18+00:00

Correct. As a man, modern feminists have become the enemy. They actively and proudly hate me, so I return the favor and I actively hate them. A shame, since I have historically been a supporter of equal rights. But in this modern climate? They can get fucked.

Title	Feminists could do well, if they develop humility
Author	beautiful_falcon776
Upvotes	29
Comments	203
Date	June 21, 2026 1:33 AM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ubd8hb/feminists_could_do_well_if_they_develop_humility/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/feminists-could-do-well-if-they-develop-humility.1583272 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583272

Comments