Do Modern men lack personal responsibility?

RapaxIII · 2025-03-05T17:03:05+00:00

I get this feeling that feminism has ultimately turned into an ideology/movement focused on denying men the ability to even conceptualize that they are going through problems. Every time men's issues come up as a topic, there's always the prevailing sentiment that they aren't victims, and it seems like women focus more on denying men status as a victim rather than addressing why men might say that

If being able to "man up" was an option for people, they wouldn't be going through negative relationship experiences, a deteriorating economy, and rise in violent crime/diminishment of law enforcement. The issue is so much more complex than feminism 101's understanding of them

addings0 · 2025-03-05T16:00:41+00:00

Take responsibility for themselves? Most already do that.

I'm not really sure where you think men should start taking responsibility for.

Would you argue that modern women should take responsibility too?

ThisBoringLife · 2025-03-05T17:31:51+00:00

This is a post about personal responsibility, where the writer spends multiple paragraphs saying that if someone is mean to you, you are released from personal responsibility.

QuiteBlurry · 2025-03-05T15:59:28+00:00

I think this is a worthy effort and I appreciate you putting it together. You had to know it wouldn't be an easy sell here but you seem to be staying with your argument, so kudos.

To answer your question, I agree that we hear from a lot of men who believe they have a problem, want a solution, and seem unaware of their role in the problem/solution or they see it but are unwilling or maybe unable to act toward a solution, or to accept that there may be no solution they like. And so they blame women, feminism, dating apps/social media, the economy, or shifting values. Even if some of those things do present challenges for a lot of men, it's those men's responsibility to meet those challenges as well as they can.

And the dehumanizing and infantalizing language directed at women is often cringe worthy, as is the denial of fact. I don't mean it as a criticism, but you didn't list some of the crappier language that's commonly used here.

Eastoss · 2025-03-05T08:22:42+00:00

are deliberately dehumanizing woman.

That's a misrepresentation of men's behavior.

Using language like "females" when referring to women

Stupid often time but not dehumanizing. And not even a common thing men do or unique to modern men.

pretending hypergamy as something modern women are doing. Pretending women only go for the top 20% of men when this figure was taken from a dating app rarely used by woman over 10 years ago.

I don't see the evidences of that being false. And that has nothing to do with personal responsibility.

Pretending woman are fucking left right and center when a women average body count is 7

Again nothing to do with modern men, and nothing to do with personal responsibility

All of this is deliberate language used to dehumanize woman

Still not dehumanizing. All of these are about humans having humane behaviors.

I'm stopping there because this is ridiculous. This post is just pile of strawmen.

Main_Aside_3072 · 2025-03-05T17:53:07+00:00

Regardles of gender, newer generations lack responsability and like to play victims, because that's what we've taught the last decade or so in society.

Efficient-Baker1694 · 2025-03-05T18:55:59+00:00

Most men do take responsibility. The responsibility has changed over the last 50-70 years and not every man has been able to adapt to it but most have. I mean one could argue that modern women lack responsibility as well considering what the responsibility used to be throughout world history. I think the bigger question is that are men and women being help responsible for things that they didn’t do.

Comfortable-Dare-307 · 2025-03-08T13:23:44+00:00

Uh yeah. It's women who don't take any responsibility. All responsibility is put on men. What planet do you live on? We have to pay bills, go to work, sacrifice time with our family to work. We work longer hours, harder jobs and do better quality work. We go to war and get killed so idiot femenists can whine on social media how they are oppressed. A woman just has to find a man, and she can be lazy and useless the rest of her life. Women don't have to work, go to war, pay bills, etc, they choose to. These are things women have the option to avoid. Men aren't given a choice. Women can literally get paid to get married and divroced. Women can ruin men's life by falsely accusing them of sexual harrassment or rape. Which happens all the time. Women get less punishment for equal crimes. Family court is always biased againat men. Even couples therapy is biases against men. When a relationship fails its always something the man does. Cheat on your husband 20 times? Oh, its his fault for not paying attention to me. Women take no responsibility.

Proudvow · 2025-03-10T21:24:01+00:00

There has literally never been a time in history where being "male" meant you could be discriminated against.

Mandatory military conscription for men is still an active thing even in relatively advanced countries like South Korea, Russia, and Ukraine.

Tywinlol2 · 2025-03-05T09:22:46+00:00

Do people who are consistently demonized and discriminated by society as a group, and get significantly less help with their problems, if any at all, lack personal responsibility? How can this be a serious question? This is like arguing that poor are poor cause they don't take risks, ignoring the fact that every single day of their life is incredibly risky.

Okay let briefly go though these:

Women were not only allowed to control money they made they were also, unlike men, not required to use that money for the benefit of their families/communities and not held responsible by society for not doing so, again unlike men. Labor back then was more physical and thus women were at such a biological disadvantage that hiring them made as little sense as employing children, which still happened due to chronic labor shortages, and thus it made more sense to organize society in such a way where they didn't have to work to begin with, and could just produce/raise people whose labor actually mattered. I love how feminists always mention that tiny minority of women work/worked in dangerous jobs and were/aren't paid the same, but never compare productivity outputs of male miner vs female miner, for example, spoiler alert there is roughly 30% difference straight up, and that is after numerous accommodations for women. https://researchspace.csir.co.za/server/api/core/bitstreams/c02dcecd-19fb-48a7-b447-37d3e5911cd6/content
Just compare venereal disease statistics men vs women, it will tell you everything you need to know about female promiscuity. https://hsph.harvard.edu/news/std-related-health-losses-higher-among-american-women-than-men-study-finds/
Men don't fight in courts for custody for the same reason they don't play the lottery. They know that unless there is a very solid case / good lawyer against mother it is pointless waste of time.
I'm originally from Ukraine please do tell how draft doesn't matter. It is irrelevant until it isn't. And abolishing it makes just as much sense as abolishing taxes.

In the end there is no place in the world current or past where women were given equal responsibilities to men, but almost everywhere they are given special privileges, ether under the banner of false equality, which is where they get all the rights of a man, but not burdens of a child, or where they are shielded and protected, with some restrictions on their freedom. And even in those society they are privileged.

Maffioze · 2025-03-05T18:11:47+00:00

They blame woman for courts being biased against fathers, yet data shows only 7% of fathers actually apply for joint or full custody and of that 7%, 70% are awarded.

That's because most lawyers advice men against doing that unless there is a good reason to deem the mother an unfit parent. Instead they reach an agreement instead of going to court, in which often times the man does not get 50% custody.

There is a wide range of evidence that suggests the court system is biased against men in general. It would be very bizzare if this would suddenly flip for custody disputes, specifically when its one of those topics where gender roles are the strongest, even the feminists you're defending acknowledge this.

You need to give us a stronger argument for why we should take this out of context statistic at face value.

They blame woman for the draft (when america doesn't even have one) and fails to acknowledge that selective service hasn't been used since the 1970s https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/countries-with-mandatory-military-service They also fail to acknowledge that modern women and feminism is pushing for this to be abolished for everyone but acknowledging woman should be included https://www.womensrepublic.net/a-feminist-take-on-conscription/

Considering we are having a jingoistic and fascist president in the White House, I think this point is completely moot. Also feminists are divided on this topic and its not that hard to understand that the biggest backlash they receive is because they do not incorporate the severity of conscription well into their theories about how the world works. There is something seriously wrong with your worldview if you can't acknowledge that being forced to fight a war does take a hell lot of privilege points away, to the point you can easily dip into the negative. Feminists generally tiptoe around this and because of this young men perceive them as hypocritical because they don't have a good answer to the hole that conscription leaves in their theories.

There has literally never been a time in history where being "male" meant you could be discriminated against.

This statement is empirically false and extremely obviously too. Are you looking for people to debate this? Because I think this is so obviously false that it isn't even worth debating.

Any time you remind me they have the same, almost better opportunities than woman, or they don't need to pay 100% on dates, or date fat or single mothers, the word misandry or feminist! is thrown out.

That's not reminding someone, that's gaslighting someone by straight up lying to their face and then calling them crazy for responding at all

Electric_Death_1349 · 2025-03-05T08:47:14+00:00

This is victim blaming and illustrates why increasing numbers of men harbour resentment towards women; the fact is, the majority of women are toxic, selfish, narcissistic, hypergamous and cruel - they are primarily interested in the top 20% of and they do settle for oofy doofy beta guys who they use to gain financial stability.

But they are also mollycoddled and treated like children and constantly reassured that nothing is ever their fault, that they are the victim, and they deserve everything they want handed to them on a plate, which reinforces and amplifies their self-centred, egotistical behaviour.

Us men get the opposite message - everything is our fault; we are always to blame; we are unworthy of even basic courtesy and so must obediently jump onto the hamster wheel of self-improvement and endlessly toil away in the vain hope that one day a sub-five - or if we’re lucky, a mid - might deem us worthy of being her Beta Male Provider for a few years until she financially destroys us in the inevitable ruinous divorce.

So in answer to your question - no.

TheNattyJew · 2025-03-05T12:54:15+00:00

You are not going to fight for your kids as a man when you are the one who is paying her lawyer bills as well as your own, and you are already facing ruinous amounts of child support and alimony. The more you fight the poorer you get

THe fact is that the world would fall apart in less than 1 day if men went on strike. No power, no plumbing, no auto repair, no maintenance people. You and your fellow women would be squabbling to exist around a campfire, if you could figure out how to make one.

Dry-Ad3452 · 2025-03-05T09:24:42+00:00

How utterly misandrist slop is continually allowed and endorsed on this site is not only concerning, but actually frightening. Whatevs though.

No, modern men do not lack personality. On the contrary, it's women who lack personality, and more importantly, lack responsibility.

You will not be satisfied until men are blamed for all the world's ills and women are given a free-pass to commit wrongdoing against men, particularly LVM...which admittedly is already happening.

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DellOptiplex7080 · 2025-03-05T16:39:56+00:00

More or less

2025-03-05T16:44:10+00:00

Yeah people can go to far with this stuff. I think it’s perfectly fair to criticize certain social issues.

TermAggravating8043 · 2025-03-06T16:50:59+00:00

My first reply was removed because I linked to my other comment. Here is the text:

Laws existed in the US for decades that discriminated against men. I will focus on two that worked in concert to deny men fair access to jobs and also from legal protections to pursue a claim against the discrimination.

The AAPs required by Biden's Executive Order 13985 and Executive Order 13988 required government entities, contract companies, and subcontract companies base hiring on demographic makeup of the population pool of the area being hired from. The policies requirement that non-male groups be given equal or greater hiring rate than the population pool meant men must be hired at most as likely as their representation within the hiring pool. This was enforced by the OCFFP and was actionable under Title 6 and Title 7. These policies were removed in January of 2025.

The background circumstances requirement upheld by the 6th, 7th, 8th, and 10th Circuit Courts, which have jurisdiction over 20 states, along with the DC Appellate Count, prevent anyone from a majority group (all men, white men and women, along with any majority gender identity or sexual orientation) that is illegally discriminated against, from pursuing Title 6 or Title 7 protections and recompence. Claimants were also denied enforcement from the OCFFP's enforcement of the AAP. The background circumstances requirement is expected to be regarded as unconstitutional by the SCOTUS, based on their opinions on the Ames v Ohio case heard 2/26/25,

All to say, laws have and do exist that discriminate against all men and some women. Denying the existence of policies such as these is done either out of lack of knowledge or an attempt to willfully manipulate by misleading others.

DGenerationMC · 2025-03-06T18:05:03+00:00

Depends on which modern men you're talking about.

Also depends on your definition of "personal accountability."

Guilty-Marzipan1058 · 2025-03-07T22:20:34+00:00

This whole “personal responsibility” schtick just reeks of boomeresque bootstrap theory. There is a fundamental sociological change with women gaining financial and sexual autonomy.The understanding between women and men needs to fundamentally change. Part of this is personal responsibility, learning emotional intelligence, helping more with domestic duties etc. However, there has been virtually no discussion about women’s behaviors and more specifically their selection process of men in a romantic context.

There has been a pretty objective rise in “sexual inequality” as a result of women setting feminist standards while maintaining patriarchal courtship roles, and men are told to just “do better”. In a world of rising economic inequality, yes it’s a good idea to take personal responsibility and learn skills to earn more money, but there comes a point where we need to acknowledge the context of how that personal responsibility translates to outcomes

abaxeron · 2025-03-05T08:55:33+00:00

Do Modern men lack personal responsibility?

No.

However TRP, like unfortunately a lot of modern men are doing, are deliberately dehumanizing woman.

WOMEN HAVE BETRAYED MEN. AND THEN SAID IT DOESN'T COUNT. WHO THE HELL LACKS PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY.

https://np.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/17e6aki/its_illogical_for_men_on_this_sub_to_blame_women/k639nfc/

Wing_Puzzleheaded · 2025-03-05T11:45:17+00:00

This post belongs in r/askfeminists

Odd_Book_9024 · 2025-03-05T13:38:28+00:00

lol no.

TRP simply states that women are constantly trying to confuse you as it is simply not beneficial for them for you to have clarity.

That’s why it’s misogynistic.

It’s saying that the brain scrambling people have and use brain scramblers.

To get what you want in life you have to learn how and when to use your own brain scrambling.

2025-03-06T17:51:35+00:00

deliberately dehumanizing woman. Using language like "females" when referring to women

It's the scientific lingo that is used in human mating science and that red pill is based on. Of course they adopt the lingo when talking about the concepts. Next thing you say it's dehumanizing to talk about human mating in social exchange theory and market dynamics matters. No, it's science and there to be specific. You cannot even define what "woman" means. Males is used in the same way, so it's not about dehumanizing women.

used to dehumanize woman as not having the same thoughts and feelings like men do

So women also have dehumanizing thoughts and feelings?

They blame
They also fail to

Who is "they"? All the people with a red pill flair? Certainly not. Why do you generalize in that matter when you criticize when red pill generalizes?

there are still places in the world where woman do not have equal rights yet men don't want to acknowledge this either.

Now it's all men? You see how this claim is ridiculous? You could not even find one post where a group of men does not acknowledge that there places in the world where women do not have equal rights. By making ridiculous accusations and statements like this, you lose credibility, you trigger reactance, you trigger emotional backlash, you trigger defensiveness and you increase the gap and drive men and women apart. You are part of the problem.

all in all, modern men would have a much easier time if they took some personal responsibly for themselves and stopped looking for others to blame.

And so do lots and lots of women. Can you agree with that, or are women in general just too good to need to take some responsibility and lose the dehumanizing thoughts and feelings?

Title	Do Modern men lack personal responsibility?
Author	TermAggravating8043
Upvotes	0
Comments	277
Date	March 5, 2025 8:16 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1j3yddx/do_modern_men_lack_personal_responsibility/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-modern-men-lack-personal-responsibility.1545669 https://theredarchive.com/post/1545669

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