If you fail to get a partner, do you visualize living your life alone for decades?

SoulBadguy0408 · 2023-10-25T17:58:09+00:00

I doubt lonely men imagine it lasting for decades because they probably think they'll kill themselves eventually

SolidusMonkey · 2023-10-25T16:46:17+00:00

I'm 33, I already have failed. At this age there's no real point in getting into a relationship for the reasons you mentioned in the last paragraph. At a certain point, us men need to realize there was a time to find love, and we missed it. Being angry about it is like being angry that you weren't born with wings to take flight with. It just is what it is.

bottleblank · 2023-10-25T14:58:53+00:00

Life alone for decades? Completed it mate.

No, but seriously, I'm curious as to what kind of responses you expected from this post. It feels like there's no discussion to be had because it's just a list of observable factual downsides to being single - all accurate, but uncontroversial and without any suggestion of a solution.

63daddy · 2023-10-25T14:48:17+00:00

I think this question hinges on how one defines “partner” and “alone”

I’ve never married but I’ve had a life rich with good friendships, dating but also independence and freedom. I’ve had many fun relationships but have also appreciated the times between those relationships where I have the time to travel and do whatever I want without compromise.

I’ll also add that relationships don’t have to mean a living together partnership. I’ve had relationships where we spend quality time together once or twice a week but are otherwise free to do as we each please. I find such relationships very fulfilling with minimal restrictions and less issues than traditional romantic partnering.

I don’t live with anyone, but I’m meeting friends today and have a date tomorrow. I’m certainly not lonely.

ReplacementPasta · 2023-10-25T14:22:32+00:00

Why is a partner required to travel and spend time with others? Like don't you have friends?

AdEffective7894s · 2023-10-25T14:52:02+00:00

Only until 60.

I work in healthcare. I feel a sense of responsibility to my job. If I disappear there is one less person trying to fix things. So I won't for now.

By the time I hit 60 my parents would be dead, so I am all clear on that front

My sister might be bothered but she has a husband and kids who will look after her so it shouldn't be too much of a loss to lose a cantankerous sibling at that age.

So I will stay on until i am forced to retire or am unable to do my job.

Then I will take up Russian roulette. Every week with a glass of single malt 20 yr old whisky.

If I survive fir more than 2 months ill look for another method

It's also motivation to me to try and live the next 30 years as best I can.

And I won't have to save for retirement

Ngl, I am kinda looking forward to it.

Training-Banana-5017 · 2023-10-25T15:19:29+00:00

Nah I can't do that because if I did it would probably lead me down the path of an incel. I just keeping trying to improve myself (for me atm this is weight loss stuff).

gntlbastard · 2023-10-25T15:21:19+00:00

I don't plan to cohabitate or live with another person. I did that shit in my 20's and I will never share a space with another human being, no matter how good the sex is.

Femcelphobic · 2023-10-25T15:27:38+00:00

As long as I have a couple of friends and some money, then I can see myself living a pretty good life. I'd travel and go to nice restaurants often.

Spare-Estimate5596 · 2023-10-25T15:48:52+00:00

Unfortunately most men are going to have to realize that they will die alone and struggle to laid for years on end.

mojobytes · 2023-10-25T17:14:57+00:00

It’s going to be tough, they’re going to put the screws to single people economically to try to force coupling and accidental reproduction. It won’t work because it’s a move against the bottom rung symptom of a larger problem, but it’s still going to be miserable.

Xtal333 · 2023-10-25T18:57:45+00:00

It is what it is.

princedune · 2023-10-25T21:53:46+00:00

No ill just suicide

SecondEldenLord · 2023-10-26T00:14:48+00:00

I already lived 33 years single, I think I can live another 33 years single by filling the empty void in my soul with distractions like buying video games, tech, travelling and focusing on my career and goals and keep failing at them cause I lose motivation way too quick cause I got no one supporting me telling me "you can do it".

Electronic_West_1831 · 2023-10-25T14:49:52+00:00

I imagine I’ll commit suicide long before I reach old age

supremethrone · 2023-10-25T16:02:00+00:00

Hell no. I can't imagine wageslaving for the rest of my life for no benefit. Ropepill is the way for me

ratboi34 · 2023-10-25T14:31:14+00:00

I will probably never have a partner again and most likely die alone. I know it's not the good way of going through life, but its is what it is. I grant myself 10 more years of trying to become better. If I'm still alive at that point and still lonely and depressed, I will just try to move to some foreign country like Kenya and wageslave on some farm, marry some tribe member and die over there from a famine caused by the consequences of climate change.

sine120 · 2023-10-25T15:42:44+00:00

I've thought about what I'd do if I were single again for whatever reason. I'd like to say I'd go out and find someone else but at my age all the women who meet my standards are taken. I always envisioned moving out to the middle of nowhere with dogs, maybe work remote from Montana or something. In reality I'd probably go work for a big company and marry my job, work 60 hours a week or something. Hopefully get something that requires a lot of travel.

Workaholiconew · 2023-10-25T16:11:46+00:00

Yeah I can see living mylife alone for decades.. do you not?

One of my lifegoals is being as far away from undesired people as possible. You just seem to care too much about randos.

romantic-knight · 2023-10-25T17:18:40+00:00

I accept the possibility that I will end up living alone actually. Honestly it's not too bad as I used to think. I have other dreams other than romance. I am not even a blue pill liberal

KikiYuyu · 2023-10-25T23:00:19+00:00

I plan on owning lots of pets.

The_Texidian · 2023-10-25T23:53:04+00:00

Hmm. Honestly, I’m 24. Once my cat dies in about 10 years, I’ll be 34. If I’m alone still, I’ll quit my job, sell my house. Then go to Vegas and lose my v card then drive up to the Arctic Ocean/Tundra and…not come back.

Just have 1 friend states away, and no family left. Just me and my cat.

Safinated · 2023-10-25T14:32:57+00:00

That’s why people often live with family and roommates

Gloomy_Attitude4196 · 2023-10-25T18:09:36+00:00

No partner means no kids and thus no family. I couldnt live such a bleak life and would commit suicide at at an arbitrarily chosen age.

la-pilule-noire · 2023-10-25T23:48:43+00:00

living for decades like this is out of the question

Oli_love90 · 2023-10-26T02:08:49+00:00

I feel like Ive only know single. I honestly cannot visualize a life with a loving partner, it’s not in the cards for me. I sometimes feel like other people have had these huge milestones(marriage, kids, etc.) and I literally can’t even find a way to start the race.

While I’m not entirely troubled being alone as I truly think I’d be a shit partner and I really love being home by myself, my main concern about being alone is cost and sickness. How will I afford suit by myself, who can I rely on to help me out after surgery or something?

revonssvp · 2023-10-26T14:55:11+00:00

I agree. Time go. You become less and less attractive, and more and more tired.

Relationship seem for me like an alien world. I can not imagine now what is living with someone.

When you are older, you interest just single mothers or divorced.

So after years alone, you just go with your life. And because you are a man, nobody care about your suffering.

But hey, there is freedom in acceptance.

Aggravating_Heat_785 · 2023-10-26T21:25:06+00:00

I haven't given up yet at 26. But honestly I'm realistic that due to circumstances, personality quirks, and other issues that I'll never find a loving relationship like my friends and family.

I imagine I'll probably double down on my work, travel, and help with charity organizations.

I can at least say that I've inspired and made a difference in other people lives through compassion and kindness. It helps that I'm in healthcare and have an authentic and empathic personality. I'm probably gonna continue with trying to make a difference in other people's lives. Gonna start to get involved with Doctors Without borders and the Redcross once my career settles down.

Being chronically single has also forced me into finding contentment in being alone. I've traveled Europe and the US solo and made friendships, met wonderful people and made memories that'll stick with me forever.

Part me of still yearns for finding a loving relationship with a woman who I could travel that world with but it's still possible to live a full filing life single.

giveuporfindaway · 2023-10-27T03:28:35+00:00

I've already lived my life alone for two decades. No need to visualize. And don't plan to go a third.

George69143 · 2023-10-25T15:36:30+00:00

I visualize myself living alone forever because I know I’ll never get a partner. Every time I go in public women actively avoid me or any guy I’m with.

abaxeron · 2023-10-25T17:01:27+00:00

Sigh...

I encounter such threads with stable regularity and try to always answer the same thing:

GOOGLE "HOBBY SHOP".

They're full of stuff that family completely deprives you of money and time for.

Rogue5454 · 2023-10-25T23:14:09+00:00

I don’t know any women that have that issue. My friend bonds are family even if any have a man in it lol.

CountMandrake · 2023-10-25T23:30:49+00:00

Alone at 34 and life couldn't be better.

I guess I could be biased because I'm alone as a choice, and I'm still dating around and having a very active "romantic" life lets say.

But other than that I'm alone, yeah. No kids, no marriage, no "us" in the foreseable future.

I just live the moment man. What can I say? I made peace already with the idea that I will be alone for the rest of my life, that I won't leave a legacy and that I'll probably face my last days as I am right now.

Not as bad as people make it to be. Yeah I guess it will be a bittersweet end, but I'm not going to regret it that's for sure.

The only thing I hope is to have someone in my life worth to make a phone call and say good bye the day I die.

And when I met God face to face I just will tell him "dude, you didn't sent me the gal you promised so that's that, no complains on my side but don't gimme shit for it. Here is my body, thanks for that, and if you find it's scrapped and beaten it's because I used it well motherfucker. I lived well, I loved, and I guess I've been loved. I'm done, see ya".

leosandlattes · 2023-10-25T14:45:21+00:00

If you have a close group of friends, it’s not uncommon for them to travel together even when some of you have families!

My parents go camping or other vacations with their friends quite frequently, and sometimes the kids join, sometimes we don’t. But their group is mixed between couples who have kids, couples who don’t, and a few singles. My dad’s best friend (late 40s) has always had a blast even while single, but we do a lot of activities that aren’t centered around couples pairing up.

I think he did recently get into a relationship through some of their mutual friends tho, so there is also an additional upside to having a core social circle who is open to meeting new people :)

Cjaylyle · 2023-10-25T15:46:57+00:00

There will be a cataclysm big enough to de-rail another 50-100 years of “people going to work, living in houses, spending time with family on weekends”

We’ve been living in a bubble. Our parents probably had the sweetspot. We’re the ones who are going to have to live through the adjustment period and what children we have over the next decade or two will be fairly used to the new reality, however that may look, by the time they’re adult (and the idea of a nuclear family with white picket fence will be stamped out of most people’s expectations within as little as five years from now I’d say

Rainbowdark96 · 2023-10-25T14:57:47+00:00

No one is anyone's first choice. Stop sentimentalism. 🤷

4SSh01e · 2023-10-25T19:06:59+00:00

Late to the party but I made this post a few days ago: https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/17cbyyk/daily_community_chat_megathread/k5rar1o/

I am rethinking dog, but if you do the math, from waking up to out of the door 1.5 hrs, let's say 0.5 hrs of total commute. 9 hrs of work. 2.5 hrs at the gym, 9 hrs of sleep, that's 1.5 hrs left between coming home and going to bed, which isn't so much and easy to fill with errands, Netflix, videogames. Then on the weekends, it's sleeping 10 hrs, and quiet time by myself which I can spend reading, building stuff, gaming etc.

But I do concede that in between the dark moments will be plentiful, when your coworkers will talk about their spouses, or dating lives and you'll get home and have time to ruminate.

Wealthy_Mystic · 2023-10-29T23:29:57+00:00

Yeah 36 years old single all my life, I wonder why even I bothered imagining sex and girls all these years maybe I thought I could manifest it, nope it only brought porn and masturbation addiction which really bad took all my youth and energy, I could have just focus on getting in shape and making money instead, wasted my two decades thinking about girls that I could never get and never will. Oh well

Mobrowncheeks · 2023-10-25T14:35:30+00:00

Why would you visualize living alone instead of trying to get a partner still?

Ok_Cantaloupe2159 · 2023-10-25T15:32:26+00:00

Nah I’ll just marry an Arab woman if it doesn’t go

Stop_Maximum · 2023-10-25T19:53:49+00:00

I don’t think it’s as bad as you make it seem, but it depends on the person. I think that once you’re able to love and put yourself first, you’re less likely to think like that. You won’t put others in a pedestal and thirst for any attention from just “anyone”.

• I’ve travelled a lot of countries on my own. • I’ve stayed in hotels, hostels and/or airbnbs paid by my work or myself which I definitely enjoyed solo. • I’ve actually spent less on my own than with others, which might not always be keen to try the places you want to try. Also, I’ve had good meals sponsored by work.

That’s a part of life, most of my friends are busy with their own thing and not necessarily a family. We meet once in a while, and are still cool with each other. Regardless of anything, you should find things that fulfill your life. Relationships are not everything and they’re not guaranteed. You might be able to do everything and still lose it.

Fofotron_Antoris · 2023-10-26T03:24:06+00:00

Pay a surrogate to have a child. I want to be a father one day, and I will be one, with or without a partner. Though obviously I would infinitely prefer having a partner along for the ride.

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bifewova234 · 2023-10-25T18:36:01+00:00

Lots of people have bad relationships with their families and will put their friends first.

fashoclock · 2023-10-25T22:16:46+00:00

I'm fine.

I have tokophobia :)

If I wanted someone I'd get a female lover (am female myself)

Eastern-Action1384 · 2023-10-26T00:14:04+00:00

Being the last option is better than being alone. I know it's hard to swallow but some men need to accept it and move on.

Sure-Comedian-347 · 2023-10-26T00:48:33+00:00

Wait until I turn 25/leave uni. If I'm still single/a virgin by then, I'll blow all my savings on drinks and travel, then kms when that's finished.

LAKings55 · 2023-10-26T03:16:14+00:00

Mid 30s now, single by choice for quite some time. I will never enter another relationship. Yeah, it can get old doing things alone all the time, but I usually manage 1 or 2 trips a year with friends. That's enough for me.

throwaway316stunner · 2023-10-26T04:19:36+00:00

Decades? At this rate, I see myself dying before I turn 50. Naturally, of course. Likely from a heart attack or some kind of heart disease.

horonlapsi · 2023-10-26T11:52:58+00:00

yeh nothing wrong with that no wife happy life

justforlulz12345 · 2023-10-26T21:55:32+00:00

I go gay

Lazyhermit96 · 2023-10-27T06:41:02+00:00

I just have become more nihilistic and won't kill myself out of spite, I've accepted I'll die alone but hopefully I get to see the west collapse even more before that

Title	If you fail to get a partner, do you visualize living your life alone for decades?
Author	Amiskon2
Upvotes	22
Comments	208
Date	October 25, 2023 2:15 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/17g5sva/if_you_fail_to_get_a_partner_do_you_visualize/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-you-fail-to-get-a-partner-do-you-visualize.1236325 https://theredarchive.com/post/1236325

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