The late author Norah Vincent debunked this "female gaze" myth back in the 1990s when she, thanks to her more androgynous features and well above average height, could pass as a dude and ask out straight women in NYC. She too believed that she could become the "ideal man" who essentially was "a woman in a males body" (physically a male, but with the emotional depth of a woman), but after going on several dates she was surprised how many straight women didn't have any interest in soft, vulnerable men. She concluded that the majority of women really do want a "manly man". I would even argue here that most of the manosphere isn't trying to bring back a patriarchy as much as they are reacting against the "patriarchy" behind women's dating preferences, by criticizing and exposing a hypocrisy between what women say they want vs. what they actually go for.