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Woman gains 65 pounds after getting married, forces husband to get Viagra after he is no longer attracted to her.

outhouse_steakhouse

March 31, 2015
1140 upvotes
/r/MensRights
http://imgur.com/Oah4WVz
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Post Information
Title Woman gains 65 pounds after getting married, forces husband to get Viagra after he is no longer attracted to her.
Author

outhouse_steakhouse

Upvotes 1140
Comments 368
Date March 31, 2015 6:10 PM UTC
(11 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/30yaob/woman_gains_65_pounds_after_getting_married/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/woman-gains-65-pounds-after-getting-married-forces.984362
https://theredarchive.com/post/984362
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Comments

[–]razether00f 274 points275 points276 points 11 years ago (51 children) | Copy Link

When you refer to it as "about 20 pounds ago" you may have a problem.

[–]SweetiePieJonas 140 points141 points142 points 11 years ago* (50 children) | Copy Link

We can infer from this comment that she put on 20 pounds in four months, right? Gaining five pounds a month is seriously unhealthy.

EDIT I thought a little illustration of what is going on with this woman was in order. Since we don't know what her height and original weight was, I have started with the assumption that she is of average height (5'5") and with the generous assumption that she was right in the middle of a healthy weight range for that height (130-140 lbs).

  • Here's what she looked like on her wedding night.

  • This is her one year and eight months later, having put on 45 pounds. This was the point where the husband stopped having sex with her.

  • This is her four months after that, on her two year wedding anniversary, having put on 20 more pounds. We have reached the point that requires pharmaceutical intervention.

We are now up to the present day as of this post, and we've definitely entered "gross" territory. Let's keep going, assuming that she maintains the steady 5 lbs./month weight gain she's averaged over the past four months, ignoring for the moment that the numbers we know from the post show an acceleration.

  • Here she is six months later.

  • Happy third anniversary! Her husband should probably stick to a crystal gift, since she'd probably eat a leather one.

  • Another two seasons have gone by.

  • Fourth anniversary. By now, everyone in the database at this height is covering themselves with drapery.

  • Six months later, and by now there are only two images in the database to represent someone of average height this obese.

  • Happy five years! Or, if you prefer, the three-year anniversary of this accreting planet forcing her husband to pop pills in order to fulfill his husbandly role as a human dildo.

I'll end it there, since that last one only had a single picture in the database. For a reminder, this is the woman he married. What a difference five years can make.

[–][deleted] 56 points57 points58 points 11 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

/r/gainit would be impressed.

[–]Oh_mrang 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Im mirin

[–]CHIBI_titan 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

You're sweet rice wine?

[–]Oh_mrang 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Nope, sweet berry

[–]WolfeBane84 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

http://i.imgur.com/0SHWLTM.gif

[–]SweetiePieJonas 15 points16 points17 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"I am admiring your stellar progress in muscle development, good sir."

[–]breakneckridge 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

mirin = admiring

[–]ericrobert 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Mac is jealous of how well she cultivates mass

[–]mcfcliam 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"TRY AND MOVE ME BRO"

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

My ex gained 40 pounds in 3 months. Of course I was the asshole when I pointed it out to her.

[–]everything_i_am 15 points16 points17 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I'm incredibly impressed with the effort gone into your post. Seriously, if I put as much effort into posts like you, I'd be king of the internet.

[–]SweetiePieJonas 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

There is only one rightful king. Bend the knee or be destroyed.

[–]everything_i_am 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

On bended knee I perch.

For you it is a bonus,

to hear your people chant:

"King SweetiePieJonas!"

[–]SweetiePieJonas -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

grits teeth

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Best post ever!

[–]mARINATEDpENIS 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

mfw

[+]junpei098 -13 points-12 points-11 points 11 years ago (28 children) | Copy Link

Seriously unhealthy? What?

[–]SweetiePieJonas 13 points14 points15 points 11 years ago (27 children) | Copy Link

If you are underweight, gaining weight this quickly can be healthy, provided that you stop when you reach a healthy weight. This is also a typical weight gain for the last two trimesters of pregnancy.

Otherwise, and especially if you are already overweight, if you are gaining 5 pounds a month, you are doing serious damage to your body. "Rapid weight gain" is typically defined as 3-5 pounds a year.

This woman, who is on pace to gain 80 pounds in a single year, is on a collision course with becoming one of those people that have to be cut out of their house by the fire department when they have a massive coronary.

[+]junpei098 -7 points-6 points-5 points 11 years ago (26 children) | Copy Link

Calling BS here. Rapid weight gain cannot be defined as 3-5 pounds a year when a typical person can cycle that weight in a 24 hour period.

[–]SweetiePieJonas 15 points16 points17 points 11 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link

Rapid weight gain cannot be defined as 3-5 pounds a year when a typical person can cycle that weight in a 24 hour period.

Stop being obtuse. You know full well that hour-to-hour and day-to-day fluctuations move around an average, and these numbers clearly refer to a trend in that average.

Where I am, the temperature recently rose by more than 30°F in a 24 hour period. By your logic it would be no problem if the average temperature rose by 30°F year over year.

This study uses a 3 lbs/yr definition, which is admittedly at the low end ("a sufficiently low threshold to allow for early detection") but that is still a full order of magnitude slower than what this woman is packing on.

3 pounds is roughly equivalent to a half of a BMI point for someone of average height. Are you really trying to tell me that adding nearly 1 point to your BMI every month, for several months in a row, is no cause for concern? That would take you from a "healthy" BMI to an "obese" BMI in less than 6 months.

EDIT Also, if you look at the study I linked, you'll see that only 9% of patients gained more than 6 pounds in a year. Gaining almost that much every month is clearly way outside of the bounds of normalcy. This woman is just eating herself to death.

[+]junpei098 -12 points-11 points-10 points 11 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Gaining that weight i would admit is a cause for concern, but i would not agree that it would be doing "serious damage to your body". The cause for concern is becoming obese which leads to health concerns of its own.

I think the problem here your flagrant use of 'rapid weight gain' and your idea that its her largest problem here. Her being obese, especially for an extended period of time, has greater health risks than the rate she gains the weight. What is most important here is that the weight gain is merely a symptom of a mental health issue she is having, which can also be tied to the crazy that has been posted here.

TL;DR: Stop being so dramatic

[–]SweetiePieJonas 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

i would not agree that it would be doing "serious damage to your body"

This study, conducted over a ten year period with more than 3000 participants, shows some pretty serious health effects (cholesterol levels, insulin levels, blood pressure, etc.) for people who gained the same amount of weight in a decade as this woman has gained in 1/30 the time. I can't believe that I have to prove to you that gaining 20 pounds in four months with no end in sight is damaging to your health.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

they are ok with fatlogic. Dont try to change them.

[+]junpei098 -8 points-7 points-6 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I never argued with the fact that being overweight was unhealthy. I challenged you on the fact that 'rapid' weight gain does 'serious damage' to ones health. Of course you blatantly ignored my main point, and took out of context another, to explain the obvious.

[–]ARC157 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

You're not the brightest bulb eh

[–]SweetiePieJonas 8 points9 points10 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Sigh

I give up.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

ALERT, ALERT, HAES FAT LOGIC SHILL.

[–]junpei098 -3 points-2 points-1 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

This is hilarious coming from a person that just learned what HAES is from just recently joining fat people hate sub. Also being 6' tall and have never been an an ounce over 145. You people making this seem like she has a gun to her head and has already pulled the trigger.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

You are still a moron.

[–]junpei098 -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

God, your not even good at being a shitlord. You shame your community.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

blah blah blah. I don't even subscribe to whatever bullshit you do, you are just trying WAY to fucking hard.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

That's water weight, not fat/lean mass.

That said, 3-5 lbs seems incredibly low to me. Someone on a lean gains type diet looking to gain muscle with as little fat as possible is still looking at 0.5-1.5 lbs per month of gain. (This is incidentally why weight is only an effective metric for people who gain nothing but fat.)

[–]fucktales 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

Typical to fluctuate +/- 5 lbs in any 24 hr period? Yeah... No.

[–]poisenloaf 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

5'10" 175lb male here.. I typically lose about 3 lbs of water weight just in the time between when I go to bed and in the AM after my morning pee. 5 lbs in 24 hours is not a stretch, especially if you factor in a big shit, and peak weight say right after lunch when you are probably your heaviest for the day.

[–]raptorrage 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, my record is a ten pound swing.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I will admit I have done this before, but It was after a half marathon. My weight also fluctuated a LOT when I was working out heavily in the military, doing 2 a days. I would fluctuate 2-3 pounds from monring to night some days.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Actually it is. Your body weight can fluctuate as much as 15 lbs based on the amount of water and shit in your body. This effect can be minimized by weighing yourself at the same time of day consistently of course, but variances of ~5 lbs is common.

You're not actually gaining or losing any muscle/fat mass in that short of time though. Weight is a very inaccurate as a short term metric. It should only be applied to track long term changes, and mainly simply so you can spot a trend at that and not to measure absolute progress.

[–]junpei098 -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

Calling +3 pounds over a year 'rapid weight gain'? Yeah... No.

Edit: Also, I do +/- 5 pounds in a 24 hour period every single summer.

[–]SweetiePieJonas 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You can argue with calling a 3-5 lb yearly weight gain "rapid", but you certainly can't argue with calling a 3-5 lb monthly weight gain "rapid."

[–]fucktales 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I didn't say what he said was correct, I only said what you said was incorrect. Whether or not you do it every summer is entirely irellevant, that in no way makes it a typical occurence.

[–]junpei098 -3 points-2 points-1 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Typical given the temperature, weather and working conditions, absolutely. It's typical for every resident of where I live. Just because its not typical in a Canada in the winter doesn't mean it can't be generally typical.

[–]fucktales -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm not sure you really understand what the word "typical" means in this context.

[+]Seicair -6 points-5 points-4 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

This is her one year and eight months later, having put on 45 pounds. This was the point where the husband stopped having sex with her.

...Yeah, I don't imagine this is terribly accurate, or else the husband is really picky. Obviously the first one is way hotter, but the 45 pounds overweight one isn't exactly obese yet. Still has a recognizable curvy figure, just overweight.

Also seems to have a different body type than the first picture, I think she carries it better than if the girl in the first picture gained that much weight.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Jesus christ your standards are low.

That's like a "grandma" tier physique.

[–]SweetiePieJonas 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

These aren't all pictures of the same woman. The database these come from includes thousands of pictures categorized by height/weight/body type/age/etc. I originally tried to link to the gallery view of the set parameters, but for some reason those links were being eaten and redirected to the main page. I had to select individual images to give a representation of someone at that height/weight.

There's also a factor of how honest the women submitting these photos are with their stats. You're welcome to peruse the site for yourself.

Obviously the first one is way hotter, but the 45 pounds overweight one isn't exactly obese yet. Still has a recognizable curvy figure, just overweight.

Remember that this is in the context of someone who apparently maintained a healthy (even "slender," to use the original poster's own word) figure the entire time she had known her husband, only to start rapidly gaining weight upon getting married. This almost certainly came with personality changes that would contribute to the husband's attraction toward her. Joining the HAES gluttony cult (which seems to correlate with an acceleration in her weight gain) would have also further signalled to the husband that she no longer cared about her health or her husband's attraction to her.

[–]Seicair 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

These aren't all pictures of the same woman.

Yeah, I know. I was saying that if the girl in the first picture gained 45 pounds I don't think she'd look as good as the girl in the second picture.

This almost certainly came with personality changes that would contribute to the husband's attraction toward her.

Absolutely. Might even have more to do with it than her figure, though he may not realize it or may not be willing to tell her.

[–]DirtyPedro 70 points71 points72 points 11 years ago (36 children) | Copy Link

"I had my ridiculous book of rules"

I found it hilarious that one of these rules was dessert "only 3 times a week" as if that is even close to "ridiculous".

"or I should find someone else who doesn't consider making love to me a chore"

The word "considers" makes it seem like he is making a choice. The fact he isn't attracted to her is entirely subconscious, it is completely out of his control.

She is lucky to have a man that loves her despite the fact he can no longer be sexually aroused by her, yet she is considering leaving him rather than either getting in shape or just not having sex. Seems the wedding vows meant nothing to her.

[–]paragonofcynicism 24 points25 points26 points 11 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Right? I don't have desert even 1 time a week most of the time. Desert only 3 time a week is ridiculous? No wonder this girl ballooned up so fast!

Also, you don't understand bro, men are always horny and will fuck anything that moves. Of course he's making the choice to not find her attractive. /s

[–]DirtyPedro 10 points11 points12 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

The 3 times a week was when she was on her "ridiculous" diet so I wonder how much she eats now. I rarely eat dessert at all either, I don't understand how people can fit it in after a big meal.

[–]atheistpiece 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's pretty easy to fit it in a couple hours later.

I don't really eat dessert too much, but when I do, it isn't immediately after dinner, it's around 8 or 9PM, and it's usually frozen yogurt from the place down the street that I walk to.

[–]intensely_human 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

My adventures with "dessert" are perhaps once every three or four weeks on my way home I'll drop into a gas station and grab a king sized snickers.

I love sweets and used to binge on the shit but after many years of meditation I guess my prefrontal cortex developed to the point where I can see the connection between the birthday cake and the four hours of feeling heavy and tired after it.

Or to put it more generally, at a certain point I stopped equating happiness with a constant pursuit of immediate pleasure.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I have dessert pretty much daily, but I also walk a fair amount, eat otherwise healthy meals, and drink water instead of soft drinks.

[–]cynoclast 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's useful to think of a soft drink as a dessert.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

does /s mean sarcastic? At first I was like "This is the internet! Let me correct that person!" but based of the first point the second doesnt make sense if not ironic

[–]paragonofcynicism 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

yes to the sarcastic part.

[–]shinarit 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

On the other hand, there are guys who specifically go for fat women. So I don't see the problem, if you don't want to change, and he doesn't want to change, then the relationship is over. Nobody is to blame, well, maybe you a bit, because entering a relationship is a mutual contract that you will keep your positive attributes.

[–]DirtyPedro -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

On the other hand, there are guys who specifically go for fat women. So I don't see the problem

The problem is the person she married wasn't one of them

if you don't want to change, and he doesn't want to change, then the relationship is over

Two things:
-One, whether he wants to change or not is irrelevant, wanting to change your sexual preferences won't automatically change them, ask a gay person if they could be straight if they wanted to.
-Two, that doesn't mean the relationship has to be over. Marriage is more than just sex(well it should be, if it's just sex, a couple should not get married in the first place). If they have kids together, sex would be an even more trivial reason for separation. Marriage vows says till death do us part, no till our sex life falters.

entering a relationship is a mutual contract that you will keep your positive attributes

Not necessarily.

[–]xNOM 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (25 children) | Copy Link

I personally think that's about 3 times too many. Sugar is deadly.

[–]amphetaminesfailure 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (21 children) | Copy Link

I don't think 3 times per week is too much for dessert, if you're active, and the rest of your diet is healthy.

The AHA says up to 37.5 grams of sugar per day is alright.

Now, if you are already overweight and obese, I would agree that consuming sugar should be limited to 1 or 2 days per week at most.

[–]xNOM 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link

AHA... You realize that these are the same morons who have been telling us not to eat fat and salt for the past 40 years and who finally had to change their advice after overwhelming scientific evidence to the contrary, right?

There is no "safe" level of fructose in the human diet. It is like alcohol. Also, like alcohol, fructose is not a necessary nutrient.

[–]amphetaminesfailure 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Well, like alcohol I consume it in moderation, I'm not overweight, and according to my physician I'm in great health. So I'll stick with both for now.

If you manage to avoid both in your diet though, that's great. It's not an easy task.

[–]xNOM 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I know. It's almost impossible, when on vacation. :-(

[–]amphetaminesfailure 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I have a rule to never feel guilty on a vacation.....you're suppose to be indulging yourself.

Every other week of the year I do my best to eat healthy, not drink too much, get enough sleep, go to the gym regularly.....screw that on a vacation.

I've never understood the people who are up at 5am on a cruise ship to go the gym.

[–]xNOM 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah... not enjoying life probably reduces it by a few years, as well.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (14 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]xNOM -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

First of all, the USDA guidelines have to do with added sugars. This means they do not occur together with water and fiber. When eaten as fruit, the fructose and fiber actually promote beneficial bacterial growth, which research is just now learning about. Gut microbiome. In fact this is one of the reasons calorie counting is stupid. Bugs eat a lot of your food.

Sugar naturally occurs in plenty of natural, healthy, foods.

LOL. Natural != healthy. Walk into the woods and start eating mushrooms....

Are you trying to say that we shouldn't eat fruits because it has sugar in it?

The fact is, noone knows. This is all new research which should have been done 40 years ago before a bunch of idiots made fat the devil. Some people say fruit is okay, but I would argue that modern fruit is also refined sugar. It is WAY sweeter than natural variants. It has been genetically engineered, by us.

What is becoming clear, however, is that fructose is metabolized like alcohol and is also basically a toxin. There is no "safe" dose of alcohol. The video link below was really eye-opening for me.

http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v482/n7383/full/482027a.html

http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v482/n7383/fig_tab/482027a_T1.html

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-guts-microbiome-changes-diet/

Sugar: The Bitter Truth

[–]Seicair 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

is that fructose is metabolized like alcohol

....Yeah, no. That doesn't even make sense. Ethanol is 2 carbons, and is metabolized into toxic acetaldehyde, then to harmless acetic acid, which enters the Krebs cycle. Fructose is 6 carbons, and at no point in its metabolism does it end up as acetaldehyde.

[–]xNOM -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

when people say this, they mean in the liver. it's SIMILAR, not exactly the same. see the video for details. Also alcohol is just metabolized sugar- It's not so surprising...

[–]Seicair 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

I'm not watching an hour and a half video, but if you link me to the point where it explains how fructose is metabolized similarly to alcohol, I'll explain why they're wrong, misleading, or intellectually dishonest.

You're right that the alcohol we drink is metabolized sugar, but you're disregarding that it was metabolized by anaerobic organisms. Fermentation doesn't use oxygen, and is much less efficient. Example- we can still burn alcohol oxidatively for additional energy, but for the organisms that generated it, it was an endpoint, a waste product. When we burn sugar, we start with oxidative processes, not fermenting processes. Edit- and we end with carbon dioxide and water, not alcohol. And alcohol is not generated anywhere along the way.

[–]xNOM -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Fructose and Ethanol both cause fat production in the liver. And share many chronic exposure effects (see last link)

Glucose discussion (beginning of biochemisty discussion) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBnniua6-oM&t=42m17s

Ethanol discussion https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBnniua6-oM&t=51m05s

Fructose discussion https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBnniua6-oM&t=56m35s

comparison of chronic ethanol and fructose effects: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBnniua6-oM&t=1h08m50s

At the end he credits Fructose biochemistry discussion to Jean-Marc Schwarz, UCB

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link

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[–]xNOM 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link

?? Dude you need to learn how to read scientific papers. They are not saying there is a "safe dose." They are saying large doses will fuck you up. LOL. There is a big difference. I should correct myself and say noone knows if a "safe dose" exists for fructose. What I meant was that it seems like there is no "safe dose" for alcohol, so it would not surprise me if the same were true for fructose. They are very similar.

"Safe dose" is a medical concept by which damage is proportional to the amount ingested, no matter how small, i.e. it is linear. A thousand tiny doses can be just as bad as one big one. With other toxins small amounts pose zero danger and do no damage. It is an area currently being researched for alcohol:

http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/cancer-info/healthyliving/alcohol/stats_and_evidence/alcohol-and-cancer-the-evidence

Apples have sugar. Grapes have sugar. These are traditionally thought to be healthy foods.

LOL this is hardly evidence that they are. Booze is also traditionally thought to be healthy. Smoking as well.

EDIT: corrected "no safe dose exists for fructose" -> noone knows

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]xNOM -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Alcohol has been consumed for millennia in "healthy diets." It is not healthy. Fructose is metabolized very similarly to alcohol. It may also be unhealthy. I think the argument is straightforward.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]xNOM 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

too much of this shit is bad for you (No duh),

It may turn out that ANY amount is bad for you. Also the average westerner eats more than enough to put them into the range where the effects are easy to see.

?? I corrected it:

I should correct myself and say noone knows if a "safe dose" exists for fructose. What I meant was that it seems like there is no "safe dose" for alcohol, so it would not surprise me if the same were true for fructose. They are very similar.

[–]xNOM -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Edit: The following paragraph was made well before the above post was edited. Unlike the OP, I will not remove or change my posts without noting why the changes were made. Especially if doing so makes the person I'm having a discussion with look stupid.

Wasn't on purpose. Just laziness. I went back and added a note, just now

[–]cynoclast -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

When I was doing aquatic martial arts ~2 hours a day 7 days a week I could eat marshmallows dipped in birthday cake ice cream with starbursts for a change of pace...for dinner. (I did a couple of times.) I also routinely ran 5+ miles with a decent elevation in the middle. I was simultaneously in the best shape of my life (like 3-4% bodyfat and fucking ripped). Water workouts can be massive calorie burners. Michael Phelps needed to eat 10,000 calories a day when he was training. Shit is nuts.

In conclusion, it's simply calories in vs. calories burned.

[–]Shadoscuro 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Only in excess as with everything. If you play sports on the weekends, go for runs in the morning, or lift in the afternoon I'd say it's fine to have some cookies after lunch every other day. Or a brownie for dessert.

As long as it's not a large triple chocolate mcflurry and you are a respectable weight no reason to say one time a week is too much. However this chick sounds like she has gone and become a full tub of lard.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]Shadoscuro 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol thanks. I felt my response was needed for a couple replies in this thread but I guess he just had the loaded gun aimed at him. NBD, but thanks for the heads up! ;)

[–]ruskyandrei 353 points354 points355 points 11 years ago (67 children) | Copy Link

I just can't help but feel like I am the one who should change ?

Must be quite difficult to grasp this basic truth when all the media bombards you with bullshit about how men should love you no matter what etc...

[–]BeyondTheLight 116 points117 points118 points 11 years ago (65 children) | Copy Link

Ironically when women do not love a guy "for who he is" and "no matter what happens", then it is suddenly okay and to be fair within her right to do so. Why can't a man do the same damn thing? Love isn't unconditional. It is obvious that for him to be aroused, the condition that his wife has to be in shape has to be met. I get the fact that being 'slender' is tiring for her and mentally hard to maintain (sounds as laziness to me, but what do I know), but if that really makes you unhappy, then why the bloody hell are you being someone or something that you do not like? Was it to just get married and be like 'gotta bitch!'? Just so you can be relaxing and let yourself go, because you know that your husband would be 'financially supportive'? That pretty much sounds as manipulation to me. Not to mention unfair, as it sounds as he is trying his damnest for you. Viagra isn't going to make him 'aroused', it will only enable him to get an erection easier. It won't change the fact that he doesn't find YOU arousing. At best you will only get some 'pity sex'.

[–]Revoran 55 points56 points57 points 11 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

The thing is, he still loves her. He just isn't physically attracted to her. Even if love was unconditional, physical attraction is another matter.

[–]BeyondTheLight 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Ironically men usually tend to see the personality of someone more often, as a lot of men are generally happy to just have a wife. Women on the other hand aren't as easily happy and to be fair that is just sound from a biological perspective. She can only get one child every 9 months or so, so she has to try and get the 'best' person she can get. That aside women leave men a lot more, when they aren't up to their standards anymore, hence the 70% divorces initiated by women.

[–]SigmundFloyd76 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I thought it was now at 80%? Either way.

I do know also that the number one reason stated for divorce is Boredom. It used to be infidelity, but then we made it about money.

And didn't I just read that 70% of men from 20-35 are NOT married? So It seems we're catching on at least.

Cheers.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

the number depends on your country by the way. there are varying statistics that usually come from the US or the UK on this topic. anyway i think the primary reason most divorces are initiated by women has nothing to do with men's feelings for women, it's because men generally have a LOT more to lose from divorce than women do. divorced men are 12 times more likely to commit suicide than divorced women, as i'm sure most of us know. divorced men are MUCH more likely to lose custody and lose a LOT of money. simply put, men fear divorce... women look forward to it, as a trump card, as a last resort, or even as a strategy. even the most trustworthy, loyal women know in the back of their head that they can divorce their husband and completely fuck him over and get rich off it, while he goes broke.

this man won't divorce this horrible woman he married, not because he loves her; i'm sure he tells her he loves her, but for men, love is dependent on physical attraction. the two are intimately connected. why? because men's love is based on genetic investment, and genetically investing in an obese woman is a bad idea; we're almost programmed to be incapable of feeling true romantic, sexual love towards an unhealthy woman. we fall in love with women so that we can impregnate them and have a genetically fit child. it's not an uncontrollable thing either; you can choose whether you want to be in love with someone or not. i'm sure he tells her that he loves her, but only because he's scared of her. he's scared of her divorcing him. he would rather fuck this monster, who fooled him into marriage so that he could pay her bills while she wasted away and stopped considering his sexual needs. what a rotten bitch, honestly. imagine if you married a beautiful woman, and then 5 months in you just stopped working and started sitting at home. how indignant would she be? it's your job in her mind. well in a man's mind, it's the woman's job to at least be fucking mildly attractive and capable of producing a healthy child. she basically breached the contract... and it seems like she knew she would do so all along. how she basks in the joy of having her bills paid by this sap. how disgusting.

and yet he won't leave her. he would seriously rather fuck this woman who totally fucked him over, and who can't even get his dick hard, because EVEN THAT is better than getting divorced as a man.

[–]SigmundFloyd76 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh brother. Broken, bitter, divorced single dad here.

My ex made false and spurious accusations of domestic violence to gain control of my house and our children.

Yeah I bought into the dream. I trusted a person unconditionally and am paying the price.

Say when, say where and I'll march in the streets.

Cheers.

[–]BeyondTheLight 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

Honestly marriage was actually generally a bad deal for men (unless members of influential families married with each other to strengthen their grip ever more, which only involves a small percentage of all people). Being 'stuck' to one woman isn't favorable from a biological perspective. It is way more lucrative to 'sow your wild oats' as you can spread more of your DNA around. Marriage eventually evolved in a zero sum game for men with women gaining half of what you own + 18 years of alimony (+ the eventual child support, which women don't completely spend on the children). Sure I get the fact that they deserve a share, because they helped raise the children, cleaned the house and you name it. What the courts really should do is just calculate what they really deserve. You have women that disproportionately do less work/ less intensive work or even no work when you compare it to the man. But no just give her half of his stuff. O yeah I forgot to mention that they believe that the woman is more capable to take care of the children even when she brings 0 dollars in the jar. That is one heck of a double standard there and pretty much stupid. I mean why would you give the children to the one who is 'broke', instead of the one who can actually take care of them as he has the resources to do so (, but no problem we will just take the money of the man).

[–]SigmundFloyd76 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree. The "best interests" of the child have little or nothing to do with our current system.

[–]stop_stalking_me 56 points57 points58 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Ironically when women do not love a guy "for who he is" and "no matter what happens", then it is suddenly okay and to be fair within her right to do so. Why can't a man do the same damn thing?

This double standard pisses me off so much

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Women marrying men on the assumption that they can "fix" them and then being unhappy when the guy doesn't want to be fixed is a time honoured tradition.

[–]BeyondTheLight 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The thing is that no one really loves anyone just for being 'themselves'. That is just a myth. You like a (girl)friend for what he/she can do. Think about having a 'chill' and caring personality, having a good job (as it generally needs some kind of 'useful' skill set) or simply having money (as money is the promise that you can call in favors, like getting food, a new computer or get someone or something to do something for you). That being said the media should stop telling men to just accept a woman "for who she is" and let men just be as 'shallow' as it is what everyone does anyway. That double standard and pardon my french can fuck off.

[–]_Brimstone 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

(sounds as laziness to me, but what do I know)

You know the naked truth.

[–]j0c1f3r 15 points16 points17 points 11 years ago (45 children) | Copy Link

This is happening to me right now, my wife says "I'm not IN LOVE with you anymore" and I said "what happened?" and the first thing she said is, "you let yourself go and gained weight"...but I changed jobs and started driving a truck over long distances and gained 25lbs (I was 215 with a 30" waist now im 240 with a 34" waist) and since this is a new business, Im constantly working and cant get time to work out, with a 2 year old to look after as well...and after only 5 years of marriage, shes ready to work on a separation because shes not attracted to me like she was before....fml.

[–]cynoclast 26 points27 points28 points 11 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

and cant get time to work out,

Eat less...?

[–]WillWorkForLTC 9 points10 points11 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Or eat more, just eat fruits and veggies, whole grain and high fiber.

[–]salad_face 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Whole grain, fruits, and high fiber, this is great advice for someone who wants constantly rising and falling blood sugar and to feel a constant pull between hungry and tired. Sure, he will lose weight on that diet with strict calorie control, but his triglycerides/cholesterol will soar through the roof, he will experience sugar/carb cravings, and he won't feel very good.

/u/cynoclast, eat meats (any kind) and veggies, and cut the carbs/sugars. Long term health benefits and sustained weight loss comes from regulating your blood sugar by avoiding foods that will spike it. And exercise at least 10 minutes a day, less for the physical benefits and more for the psychological ones.

[–]BiDo_Boss 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I believe your comment should be directed at /u/j0c1f3r not /u/cynoclast.

[–]RainyRat -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

This. When we started dieting, I couldn't believe how much (in terms of volume) we were eating, compared to pre-diet. A 5lb sack of carrots has less calories than a .5lb box of doughnuts.

[–]WillWorkForLTC -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

People focus on calories but if your intestines are moving volume then that's more food you're not holding onto forever absorbing more energy from. That's not the only reason but in general naturally skinny people are making more trips to the John each day. Fiber can even the playing field in that respect.

[–]j0c1f3r 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

ya, i find i eat a lot more while im driving...sooo borrrrriiinngggg...

[–]todayismyluckyday 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, r/keto would like to have a word with you.

[–]Intaanettoman 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Head on over to /r/keto

[–]Karma9999 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

/r/keto works really well, I'm down 2 stone since January.

Sadly that won't fix the problem you have with a wife who's not willing to stand by you.

[–]BeyondTheLight 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

A common misconception is that people think that they have to exercise a lot to lose weight, but that is just fighting the symptom. The real cause why people eat too much is usually a psychological reason. Generally originating from stress. So most of the time the best solution is to try to change your diet. Try to eat just enough to not feel hungry all the time just like /u/WillWorkForLTC said.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

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[–][deleted] 14 points15 points16 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Amen, preach on shitlord.

This dude needs to take some personal responsibility for his own choices.

Doing a fucking pushup instead of bitching on the internet.

[–]ovrsurge 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I get this logic, it's correct. But people do need personal recreation time and for some this doesn't mean exercising at every free moment. He probably should find ways to better organise his time to provide at least 15-30 minutes for exercise per day and eat properly. Unlike the woman in the post, he would have legitimate difficulty in finding the extra time around his job and other personal needs. That isn't an excuse however.

[–]wisty 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

True, it's bullshit fat-logic.

OTOH, it's hard to know without context who is really at fault. The weight gain is something that can easily be worked on. I think there's a lot more to this story.

[+]j0c1f3r -14 points-13 points-12 points 11 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

Hey Fuck face, what if I was depressed about this situation, your fuckin lack of empathy shows your some douchebag fuckin gym goof...I didnt push steel sweetheart, I trained as a boxer for 20 years, im not lazy shit dick, im mid forties and exhausted with everything thats in my life right now...So, NO I DONT HAVE THE TIME OR THE ENERGY, YOU FUCKIN GOOF....besides this is about acceptance from your spouse, shit dick....wow, I feel better now. Die, you self righteous asshat...sweet.

[–]WZRDBEATS[🍰] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Dont come here posting about how you dont have time to work out and your wife doesnt find you attractive if you dont want people to tell you you do have time. You do. You are choosing not to do pushups right this second. Dont look for pity here.

[–]j0c1f3r 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Pushups while driving?

[–]WZRDBEATS[🍰] -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Why are you posting on reddit while driving?? Great response

[–]j0c1f3r -5 points-4 points-3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

easy enough to do with the tablet..

[–]Hereforthefreecake 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Seriously? I work 3 jobs. I work full time as a storage manager, I have a part time retail gig, and I have a work-from-home type job. I easily put in 80-100 hours a week at my busiest. I also gained a substantial amount of weight. My wife came at me the same way yours is coming at you. I also have a 2 year old. All you are doing is making excuses. Hence the downvoting.

So instead of criticizing, let me ask you this. Do you have space for a weight bench or power wrack? Do you have an extra 300$ to buy a Wrack + 300lbs of weights? If you do, then you can change your life. If you don't you can get a gym membership for 300$ a year. Read everything on www.stronglifts.com about their 5x5 program. I have lost 40 lbs in 4 months, 80lbs to go. I have a fucking mountain of fat to climb still. But the best part about this program, is that it takes 30-40 minutes 3 times a week. You just have to get up and do it. And lucky for you, you only have 20lbs or so to drop. Quit making excuses, and start making changes. The best thing for depression is working out. If you are in the Denver area send me a PM. We can be work out buddies.

[–]ScottSummerscamp 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Just because you were a boxer then doesn't mean you aren't a lazy cunt now. Don't complain and whinge like the lady in the post, do something with yourself. Consider yourself fortunate that your wife decided to tell you exactly what the problem was. If you elect to do nothing about your inflating corpus, then don't be surprised when she leaves or starts messing around on you. It's fucking rude to take your partner's attraction for granted.

[–]j0c1f3r 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Hey fucknut, I drive 16 hours a day 9 days in a row, and when Im home Im the stay at home parent chasing after a 2 year old in my mid 40s, you fuckin goof....I got a bit of a gut not, thats all, still got 18' arms and shoulders like a gorilla you fuckin punk, so go mind yourself and get back to fuckin your douchebag mother, cuntface.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]elebrin -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You would be amazed at how much energy you have after that short run.

I'd disagree with that, I always feel like laying down and dying after running. I can't breathe, heart racing like I'm about to have a heart attack, and it lasts for a couple of hours afterwords. Basically I end up laying on the couch panting. not pleasant.

[–]txroller 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

240 w a 34" waist??? I must see pics to believe this. (I am 5"10 198 w a 36 in waist)

[–]j0c1f3r 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

genetics, when I was lean at 215, i had my waist down to 29"...latin build has small waists...Im only 6'.

[–]txroller 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

being 6'0 explains a lot. you deserve a better s/o

[–]j0c1f3r 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks man....

[–]masgrada -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Gut? Diet soda has recently been proven to give people three times the belly fat of a normal person.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That article left a lot to be desired and it was only on people older than 65. I wouldn't take it as a hard truth.

[–]j0c1f3r 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

never drink it, for over 20years...thanks.

[–]Not_A_Greenhouse 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

5'9 33 inch here. I also don't believe him

[–]elebrin 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

If he's like me, big gut with a small waist is perfectly possible. Pants go under the gut. 5'8" 220 lbs, 34 inch waist. If I measure my widest bit, it's a good deal larger.

[–]caius_iulius_caesar 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Then that's not his true waist.

[–]squeak6666yw 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

I use weight watchers when i want to lose weight and it seems to work for me. Its all calorie counting and you don't have to work out at all if you don't want to or can't find the time. I highly recommend you try it out.

[–]SilencingNarrative 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Weight watchers works like a charm for me. Points = calories/50 + fat grams / 12 - fiber grams / 5. 40 points or less a day and i lose weight. No more than 50 and i dont gain weight.

[–]j0c1f3r -3 points-2 points-1 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

IM.ON.THE.ROAD....

[–]squeak6666yw 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

you just count calories intake. they give you a number of points you eat each day a high number and a minimum you must eat. everything you eat has a point value. you can live on potatoes chips and ice cream and lose weight on this. It doesn't make you healthy it just helps you lose weight.

edit: also you said earlier your eating out of boredom i also recommend books on tape. find a boo series you think you might like and try that out.

[–]j0c1f3r 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I do listen to them...i have like 100 hours of star wars books on tape... i gotta figure out something i can do on the road...thats all, just so strapped for time driving across Canada, time i use, costs me time with my son.

[–]ICantReadThis 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

Weight Watchers. Go to the website. Add the app to your phone. The online version is only $20/month. It seriously works, and they made the website version for guys (because apparently we like tracking numbers but don't like attending support groups). It's basically simplified calorie counting, but if you like playing video-games, it's effectively min-maxing your food.

Once you get the hang of losing weight at a slow, steady pace and tracking your intake, you can switch to something like myfitnesspal, which is free but a bit messier in design.

Seriously, if you're a trucker, you have the easiest job for weight loss if you know what you're doing. Stick to fast food, where calories are a known quantity and portions are pre-determined, and you'll be surprised how quickly you can slim down. This is also a good time to start, because all the progress-destroying holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas) are months away.

Source: I spend 12 hours a goddamn day sitting on my ass and I've both lost 30+ pounds and have kept them off for several years. Did I forget to mention that it's also healthier and all but eliminates morning stomach pain for most people(if that's been a problem for you, anyway)? Seriously, give this a shot.

[–]j0c1f3r 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I need to be clear on something, I know a lot about eating healthy and exercise, I just married a woman 12 years younger than me that liked I was buff(from being a boxer), and I had to be away from her and my 2 year old son 21-24 days out of the month driving, if I want to make money on our business. Being in my mid-40s now, this driving as taken toll on my health, it would seem, and I've been finding it hard to get the energy to work out, my joints hurt and I feel tired a lot. That being said, I think my problem is my wife, shes young(early 30s) and very beautiful, and Im starting to think it was a bad idea to "love with my eyes"...and now, I need to change everything. Thanks for the help, I moved away to be close to her family and have no one here to sit down and talk to....cheers.

[–]ICantReadThis 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I know a lot about eating healthy and exercise

First of all, thanks for getting back to me. I don't know if this will at all be useful, but given your signifier about being a boxer:

I'm sure you know all about eating healthy as an athlete. Please, take my advice as someone who knows pretty well about eating healthy as a sedentary individual. I've only seen a glimpse as to what boxers do for simple-ass warm-ups, and it's an order of magnitude more than what us pedestrians do to get through the day. It's a different lifestyle, and top to bottom, food consumption is going to control what your belly looks like. If you can keep the intake trimmed down (again, it's a pain in the butt, but tracking works, and you no longer have to maintain as strict a breakdown of your macros as you might have in the past) it can seriously help both your phisique and your long term health. Proof? - Mayo clinic, belly fat

And yes, it's probably a bad idea to "love with your eyes" in the long run, but that's for more than just weight ;-D

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Bench press the kid.

[–]j0c1f3r 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Bench press the kid.

Actually, this might work...

[–]eletheros 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It won't change the fact that he doesn't find YOU arousing. At best you will only get some 'pity sex'.

Remember, when a man refuses to have sex with a woman, he's raping her.

[–]ChristopherBurr 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Why can't a man do the same damn thing?

we can, and we do .. just because they don't like it, shouldn't matter

[–]BeyondTheLight 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It was a rhetorical question ;).

[+][deleted] -9 points-8 points-7 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

some people straight up aren't built slender.

I'm long and thin but a lot of my friends, both male and female, are more squat than I.

hell, I'm still pretty thick compared to some gazelle lookin motherfuckers I see.

[–]BeyondTheLight 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I am just quoting her words. I do not know what her definition of 'slender' is, but it is clear that her husband doesn't like the fact that she gained weight.

[–]eloquentnemesis 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

He could still fuck her up to +45lbs. Maybe she could have found a comfortable weight below +65 that they both could enjoy.

[–]KingMong 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

yeah im tall and broad shouldered, hides my weight pretty good, i mean i don't look in shape, but i don't look 270lbs either.

[–]gaedikus -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

but, but meghan trainor said!!!

[–][deleted] 42 points43 points44 points 11 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

My ex put on some serious pounds after we got married. When I told our councilor that all the added weight made her unattractive to me she (our councilor) was like, "yeah, I can understand that. we've all got our own personal tastes".

And shes even a feminist, too!

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

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[–]raptorrage 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I don't get this love the skin you're in being an excuse to be wildly unhealthy. Loving your body is treating it well

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

yeah if someone truly loves their body I imagine they would want to treat it well. Maybe some people just really love their fat rolls. Each to their own I guess.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The problem is a healthy lifestyle and body image issues are being conflated. People who are overweight and develop body image issues look to a healthier lifestyle as a solution, but because they don't actually want to lead a healthy lifestyle (they just want to lose weight/feel better about their body) they tend to rebound a lot and implement concepts poorly. (Which then leads to eating disorders and other drastic solutions.)

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

At the same time, sex is an important part of a relationship and if he's at the point where sex is a serious no-fly zone that puts the entire relationship in jeopardy and it's not entirely unfair of her to discuss the issue with him.

It's not like she's holding him at gunpoint and telling him to go get viagra. He's trying to compromise with her because he realizes her needs aren't being met and he still cares enough to try and maintain the relationship.

But you know, compare it to rape or whatever.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Her husband was avoiding the issue rather than discussing it with her, and she would have never have known why he wasn't having sex with her anymore if she hadn't talked to him about it.

That said I don't disagree that a lifestyle change is the smart thing to do here. I just don't like casual usage of the word "rape" to describe what amounts to a "pretty please, will you do this for me?" kind of request. and it's not even Men's Rights related...

[–]tucsonled 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's not kind of like rape, it is rape

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (31 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Clockw0rk 79 points80 points81 points 11 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link

Anyone involved in HAES is mentally ill, full stop.

There's nothing healthy or sane about intentionally make yourself sick.

[–]CorporateNINJA 28 points29 points30 points 11 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

Had to look up what HAES is, but after doing so, totaly agree with you.

[–]Sarge-Pepper 18 points19 points20 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

HAES At first, when i went to the Wiki page, i was mad.

Then i got past the first paragraph and realized the whole article was about how this movement is full of shit and Obesity is an actual problem, citing facts and standards, i got happy again.

[–]HannasAnarion 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

After a quote you have to hit enter twice.

[–]drilldrive -4 points-3 points-2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I don't get why people get so fat, I am actually a little underweight because I forget to eat every once in a while. I can't imagine why the expenses and the health risks don't stop these people. If you are overweight you are either lazy or have an eating disorder.

[–]kaliwraith 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

People have a natural weight that varies between individuals based on metabolism given moderately healthy eating and moderate exercise (eat all the food groups, don't overeat, don't spend all day every day on a couch), but no one has a natural healthy weight that is obese.

[–]reversememe 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's because they fill the hole in their soul with food, and modern society happily obliges them with concentrated salt, fat and sugar. That or they think they're eating healthy when drenching a salad in dressing.

[–]raptorrage 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It would be a great idea, if it was saying that you can try to eat healthy and exercise and take care of your body at any weight. But slobs use it as an excuse to be 600 pounds and insist that people can't criticize their health choices AND have to find them attractive

[–]stop_stalking_me 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I had too look it up too. Sounds like something some hipster SJWs came up with.

[–]jubbergun 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

/r/TumblrInAction sometimes has some good HAES posts, along with other WTF SJW silliness.

[–]theelectricmayham 65 points66 points67 points 11 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

HAES was made by fat women, for fat women. It's a bunch of fatties who can't accept that the reason they are fat is because of choices they have made, and they are in such denial that they go so far to say that they are healthy... Don't get me wrong, I'm overweight myself, but I know I have a weight problem, and it's something that I've been working on for a long time.

What it comes down to is a lot of these people can't take responsibility for their own lives. Weight loss is hard, and it takes a lot of work- and a lot of these people are the kind of people who refuse to lift their finger for anything less than a pizza.

I personally think that any doctor that supports HAES should have their medical license reviewed. Obesity is not healthy. It would be one thing if these ladies had a little extra, but most of these people are obese.

TL;DR HAES was made by fat women for fat women, who don't want to change and believe everyone should accommodate them.

End Rant.

[–]Daemonicus 9 points10 points11 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Well said. It will always amaze me to see the lengths that some people go to justify their vices, instead of either accepting them or not.

[–]slavik262 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I'm overweight myself, but I know I have a weight problem, and it's something that I've been working on for a long time.

Cheers to you and best of luck.

[–]theelectricmayham 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you, cheers!

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"Health At Any Size, except thin people. Eat a fucking burger you skinny bitch! I'm getting triggered here!"

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

HAES was made by women for women who don't want to change and think everyone should accommodate them.

FTFY

[–]theelectricmayham 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Truth

[–]TheCarmineCapsule 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

should have their medical license revoked.

FIFY.

Well said, and good luck.

[–]waspbr 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

so basically it is a circlejerk

[–]theelectricmayham 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Essentially.

[–]serpentinepad 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Not only accommodate them, but want to have sex with them as much as we would a fit person.

[–]TracyMorganFreeman 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"You know, I think I'll ignore the medical community about what healthy is. I have self esteem to maintain and gyms are a drag."

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]GSstreetfighter 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Brilliant! Cannot unread.

[–]MrHuk 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That's what made me laugh, you didn't start anything, you just stopped giving a shit and turned yourself into a disgusting pile of flesh that's so hideous even the man who loves you can't get hard around you.

I just feel sorry for the poor bastard husband, he now has to drug himself and force himself to fuck that smelly, sweaty ogre.

[–]jubbergun 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

just giving up and eating sticks of butter whenever you felt like it.

TIL I'm already practicing HAES.

[–]elokr 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You go girl!?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Since most of us have no idea wtf this is and all you assholes made me google it. "Health at every size"

[–]TexSC 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

HAES

I had to look this up:

Health at Every Size (HAES) is an idea that "supports people in adopting health habits for the sake of health and well-being (rather than weight control).".[1] It hopes to remove discrimination of obesity and improve standard of living for people who are overweight. HAES believes that traditional restrictive dieting does not result in sustained weight loss for some people,[2] HAES suggests that this method is not always healthful. HAES proposes that health is a result of behaviors that are independent of body weight and submits that societal obsession with thinness does not allow for diversity in body shapes.[3] In particular, HAES claims that being obese is not a problem, contrary to the consensus of the medical community.[4] HAES has recently gained popularity among proponents of the fat acceptance movement as an alternative to weight-loss.[5][6]

- Wikipedia

[–]blueoak9 162 points163 points164 points 11 years ago* (32 children) | Copy Link

"Wiil ensure arousal"? Ignorant sow. Viagra doesn't make you aroused. It just causes an erection. Learn something about men's bodies for fuck's sake.

[–]Novaer 289 points290 points291 points 11 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link

Let's play "Reverse the Gender!"

If a man got super fucking slobby and said to his wife "You're not having sex with me because you're not attracted to me. Let's get you on some meds to make you wet whenever I want."

The dude would have a rally of pitchforks coming after him.

[–]Mizzet 94 points95 points96 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Jesus, it really does sound terrible, now that you put it that way..

[–]germaneuser 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

This sentence right here makes me really sad...it shouldn't even need to be flipped for it to be seen for the absurdity it is:(

[+][deleted] 11 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Artector42 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

Doesn't sound quite as bad to me. Not good, but not as bad.

[–]ThePedanticCynic 10 points11 points12 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

The reversal isn't quite right. This is more accurate:

"My wife isn't having sex with me anymore, because she no longer finds me physically attractive. I lost my shit when she told me this and she finally agreed to buying a tub of lube to ensure penetration, and we are setting up some counseling sessions."

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

tub of lube is so not even close to a fucking medication that has a ton of negative side effects. viagra can seriously fuck you up. the fact that she wants to medicate him as if he has some kind of mental problem because he's not attracted to a fucking obese woman is just disturbing. she is such a fucking special snowflake she can't realize that NOBODY is attracted to her, he doesn't have a disorder that must be "treated," he's just not attracted to someone with very poor reproductive fitness. completely subconscious. and honestly even then it's not like viagra is gonna make him want her, it won't ensure arousal it will just ensure he has a boner for 4 hours... maybe not even that, just reading her was a major turn-off so that really might counteract the viagra.

[–]pasaroanth 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Actually Viagra was originally intended to be a heart medication and they just happened to find out it gave men raging huge hard-ons, so most of the "side effects" have to do with it's core intended purpose. They're relatively mild and similar to nitroglycerin (flushed feeling, headache, etc), and really only in the 20-30% prevalence range.

This said, I broke one in half and took it as a 30something with no ED problems just to see what it was like...and it felt like the tip of my dick was going to shoot off like tomahawk missile.

[–]NijjioN -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Was intended for low blood pressure if I recall correctly... so if you already have high blood pressure though... it can be very bad for you.

[–]pasaroanth 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You are exactly the opposite of what it correct, but I applaud you for being impressively incorrect.

[–]ARedthorn 25 points26 points27 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

She has accurately described putting him on a date rape drug.

Don't want to have sex? I don't care. Take this, so we can have sex anyway.

[–]raptorrage 12 points13 points14 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Viagra only works if you're aroused. She's not gonna be happy when even meds don't work

[–]ARedthorn 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

True, but I figure it won't be JUST viagra. Add some physical stimulation, and who knows.

Still- even if it doesn't work... That just makes it attempted rape. She thought it would work... And intended to rape him, even if she didn't think of it as rape.

[–]ThePedanticCynic 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

This is a rape grey area. He did agree to try this... sort of. I don't consider being manipulated into sex under the rape category.

[–]ARedthorn 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Absolutely a grey area...

But how coerced he is, is hard to tell by this one meager post, from her perspective.

Could be he fears losing his kids and income to a messy divorce. Coercion requires threats (active or passive, but real threats)... Those threats need not be physical.

They can be legal, social, or psychological.

[–]raptorrage 9 points10 points11 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Plenty of women are told to suck dick to keep their man happy or just take one for the team and fuck him.

But that's wrong too. If you turn into a fat fuck, you need to understand if your SO doesn't want to fuck

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points24 points 11 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

Viagra also won't cause erections in the absence of arousal. If the guy's not aroused Viagra isn't going to force him to have a boner.

[–]MaleGoddess 13 points14 points15 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

can confirm. I popped a viagra just for the hell of it. Did not get a 4 hour boner. Was not impressed.

[–]Stephen1985 8 points9 points10 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Second that, I felt like I was half cocked most of the time when I had taken it. If someone had so much as Said titties I would have got one but nothing happened.

[–]raptorrage 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Are you kidding me? You took for funsies viagra and didn't jerk off? I'd be all over that

[–]MaleGoddess 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I had a prescription, so I experimented with it. I don't need it, just asked the Dr and he wrote me a script.

[–]CombatWombat222 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Well that makes the porno I was watching earlier a whole lot less believable.

[–]blueoak9 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

So in other words she has the sequence of events wrong. She's not just ignorant of men's bodies but also of how the drug works.

[–]Furah 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Given that you're advised against using it if you have heart problems, I'm going to hazard a guess that it likely just increases blood flow, or thickness.

[–]3mpir3 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

Sort of. Viagra, and similar drugs, are competitive PDE5 inhibitors of cGMP. In the corpus cavernosum, it leads to higher levels of N.O., which relaxes smooth muscle and vasodilation.

  • I.e., They indirectly increase bloodflow; but Viagra by itself wont cause arousal. It just inhibits the mechanism that leads to pushing-rope.

[–]Artector42 -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Your use of cGMP made me want to call bullshit because in pharmaceutical manufacturing it means current Good Manufacturing Practices. No real point other than that.

[–]3mpir3 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Like they say, you can't shit a shitter. I'll edit "cGMP" for "magic". Hope that clears up any confusion :P

[–]redpillbanana 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I've a better prescription to ensure arousal: an attractive slender young woman.

[–]pasaroanth 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Ignorant sow.

I just wanted to take a moment to commend you on the use of that.

[–]blueoak9 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Men have been "pigs" for decades now, so no one should bat an eye at calling her that.

[–]Luis_Leon 53 points54 points55 points 11 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link

Too bad this image cuts off before the shitstorm of responses.

"You're beautiful and perfect in every way! If he can't handle how much beauty you've packed on recently, then you need to find someone who deserves all that love."

[–]DirtyPedro 48 points49 points50 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

It's disgusting, they have no regard for her husband, who still loves her. Encouraging her to leave a good man instead changing or just dealing with the sex life she ruined. Wedding vows mean nothing to these types of self absorbed monsters.

[–]kaliwraith 9 points10 points11 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's too bad women have next to nothing to lose from divorcing a "financially supportive" husband. He doesn't deserve a self-centered woman who can't take care of herself, but happiness will cost him a lot if something doesn't change.

[–]v8beetle 12 points13 points14 points 11 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

There were only two comments after her post. If you take the first line and google it you'll find the post. Then scroll down to her comment.

The follow up comments are as follows:

"On November 21, 2011 at 4:52 pm x said: This article and all of the comments, are really pulling at my heart strings. My husband and I have been together for 6 yrs, married for 2. All through our relationship i was slender..but miserable. I wouldnt say that i was unhealthy, but I had my ridiculous book of rules and I stuck with them. ” no eating after 7:30″, “desert only 3 times per week” ” gym everyother day come rain or shine” etc. SInce I got married 2 years ago, and since I started HAES, I have gained 65 pounds. My husband ofcourse looks like he did the day I met him, and couldnt be a better husband. He is a wonderful listener, incredibly handsome, helpful, calm, and financially supportive. HOWEVER. about 20 pounds ago, after I had put on about 45 pounds, he stopped making love to me. I asked him about it, and he said he was stressed out about work. Our love making went from a daily party to several weeks, with me always persuing. Last night after 4 months of not having sex, I begged with him to tell me why. He said ” I love you more than I have ever loved anyone, and you are the best thing that has ever happened to me, but I don’t find you physically attractive since you have gained so much weight, you transformed into someone i hardly recognize” I exploded at him, and he promised he will try to start having sex with me again. He is getting a prescription filled to ensure arousal and we are setting up some counseling sessions. I just cant help but feel like I am the one who should change? I should go dust off my book of rules, or I should find someone else who doesnt consider making love to me, a chore.

Reply On November 22, 2011 at 4:19 am danceswithfat said: I’m so sorry that this is happening to you. I would be in way over my head to give advice here other than to say that I would suggest that the two of you definitely get some counseling sooner rather than later, and maybe work separately as well as together. I believe that you are beautiful just as you are. Good luck,

~Ragen

On November 22, 2011 at 3:57 pm Jennigma said: I’m jennigma at gmail dot com. I commented above. Since my sweetie and I have similar attraction issues, if you and/or your sweetie would like to talk to us about coping with something similar, feel free to email and we can do that. Not sure if it will help, but we may have some strategies you can try."

[–]charliebeanz 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Do you have a link?

[–]v8beetle 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

https://danceswithfat.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/dating-fat/

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

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[–]v8beetle 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I know. I am more inclined to think the poster of that original text is a bait and switch artist.

[–]Luis_Leon 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

You mean a clickbait and switch artist?

[–]v8beetle 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

No, I mean someone who puts up a front to attract someone then once they got them they change and expect everything to go on as it did before.

[–]Luis_Leon 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Yeah...so that joke whooshed pretty hard on you then?

[–]v8beetle 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Perhaps, I've read too much today and am still reading research.

[–]Gothiks 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I'll take "Things I say online to validate my own unhealthy lifestyle for $300, Alex."

[–]Finn1916 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

One comment on that site is from a big woman who complains that men aren't interested in her and then she goes on to say that she doesn't like big men.

[–]SqishyRina 17 points18 points19 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

The entitlement here actually kinda sickens me. By her own description, her husband has stayed in good shape throughout the entire relationship, yet she seems to think that it's unreasonable for him to expect the same from her. She even acknowledges that her weight is causing the problem, yet refuses to accept responsibility for it.

[–]Demonicpoodle 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That's just how this Healthy At Every Size operates... Remove all responsibility for your health. Ignore tons and tons of data and examples that are meant to be learned from that being obese is dangerous to your health, usually dangerous to attraction (usually), dangerous to how people will perceive you...

[–]Surprentis 90 points91 points92 points 11 years ago (26 children) | Copy Link

Might as well be rape at that point.

[–]mrheh 32 points33 points34 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Physical and mental.

[–]St0n3dguru 81 points82 points83 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"You don't find me attractive? Take these drugs."

Sounds like date-rape.

[–]ManRAh 66 points67 points68 points 11 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link

She's literally drugging him so he'll have sex with her. By definition, it absolutely is.

[–]DirtyPedro 46 points47 points48 points 11 years ago (21 children) | Copy Link

He is consenting to it, but obviously he does not want to have sex with her.

[–]ManRAh 65 points66 points67 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Didn't you hear? The new definition includes pressuring someone into sex (but it doesn't count because he's a guy and they always want to screw everything, right? He must be impotent if he won't fuck a planetoid).

[–]Ghee_Buttersnaps_ 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

B...but...he's a man. Men can't be raped. He needs to have sex with her at her will or else he's literally a misogynist pig.

[–]RabidAnubis 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Wait what? It does include pressuring?

Could you give me a source on that?

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]deschutron 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

so according to the new SJW definition of rape, she's a rapist

Are colleges and high schools using that definition?

There are drugs involved

Surely the drugs aren't affecting his consent to sex because he's consenting before he takes them.

[–]elborracho420[🍰] 16 points17 points18 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

He's consenting after she coerced him into it.

[–]XJXRXVX 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

He can still say no.

[–]elborracho420[🍰] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm not saying whether I believe coercion makes it rape or not, but legally speaking it does make it rape.

[–]99639 -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If someone holds a knife to your throat and tries to rape you, you can also say no. There is coercion though and that is rape. At least if you reverse the genders.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, to a normal person we'd say he's consenting to it, but if the genders were reversed, he'd be going to trial or some shit for coercing a woman into having sex, which is basically rape these days.

[–]raptorrage 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If your husband gets super fat and tells you he'll divorce you if you won't fuck him, let his pork ass go.

[–]carchamp1 -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I don't think any "normal" person would consider this "consent", especially in the context of marriage/family law.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]alcockell[🍰] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yup - "denial of sex" under Duluth and current DV rules counts as "domestic violence..."

[–]carchamp1 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

This is not consent. He's doing it because he has to. In case you haven't heard divorce really sucks for men.

I've been saying for many years that Viagra is a rape drug. This is but one example. I'm telling you that these guys who can't get it up, can't get it up for the wives. It's not a physical problem usually. These guys are just trying to avoid divorce.

edit: Just in case you're not sure where I'm going with this, you are fantastically off base.

"He is consenting to it, but obviously he does not want to have sex with her."

Are you fucking kidding me?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

No one is fucking kidding you, that is how sexual assault works.

If you consent, you've given consent. The amount of legal ramifications if we considered consent given while not wanting to have sex would be horrific (especially for men).

[–]carchamp1 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

In the context of marriage, divorce, fearing the loss of your children, being taken to the cleaners, this is NOT consent by any stretch of the imagination. Would he be forced to take Viagra and forced to have sex with her in a normal, non-coerced situation? Of course not. This is rape - period.

This is but one reason civil marriage should be abolished. It's an abomination.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Of course not. This is rape - period.

No, it fucking isn't, because this is not the only case of coerced sex that has ever happened. If this was legally considered rape it would set a precedent that would fuck over so many men who weren't given clear signals that the woman wasn't into it.

He can say no, if he cared enough he would. I understand why you're pissed off but you can't view stuff like this in a vacuum, you have to look at the broader implications of calling something rape.

[–]carchamp1 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't know what you mean. There are a bunch of guys out there drugging their girlfriends and wives and forcing them to have sex? And getting away with it? And they should be able to get away with it?

I honestly have no idea what you're trying to get at.

[–]XJXRXVX 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm sure he only has two options in this situation: have sex with the woman he married, or divorce the woman he married. Which sounds more fiscally stable? I'm not sure if I would be clamoring for divorce after years of marriage over something that can be fixed by her returning to her old gym and nutrition standards.

[–]SpawnlingMan 24 points25 points26 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

She admits that he's stayed in shape. Admits he's a wonderful man. He even says he loves her more than anything and she relays that. All of this and she won't lose some weight for him. He's not even throwing it in her face. She's a real bitch.

[–]jchriscloud 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

A man hopes his bride stays exactly as he married her, but she changes.

A woman hopes to change everything about her husband, but he stays exactly the same.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points11 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

From wikipedia:

Health at Every Size (HAES) is an idea that "supports people in adopting health habits for the sake of health and well-being (rather than weight control).".[1]

okay, thats fine.

It hopes to remove discrimination of obesity and improve standard of living for people who are overweight.

thats cool, I wouldn't want to be made fun of no matter what my weight was.

HAES believes that traditional restrictive dieting does not result in sustained weight loss for some people,[2]

ummmm...in very rare cases maybe, but not often.

HAES suggests that this method is not always healthful.

wait...wtf does that mean? there are unhealthy ways to consume water (gallons at a time) but people still say that water is healthy for you.

HAES proposes that health is a result of behaviors that are independent of body weight and submits that societal obsession with thinness does not allow for diversity in body shapes.[3]

I'm starting to get dumber. what do you mean health is independent of body weight?

In particular, HAES claims that being obese is not a problem, contrary to the consensus of the medical community.[4] HAES has recently gained popularity among proponents of the fat acceptance movement as an alternative to weight-loss.[5][6]

imma stop you at "contrary to the consensus of the medical community."

[–]konoplya 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

its like im reading tumblr in action

[–]Totsean 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Evolution in progress... wow.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The is the type of entitlement to a person's body you would expect to hear feminists and SJW's yell and scream at men about in our "rape culture" society.

[–]itsjustfortheporn 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

This is my dirty secret. This exact scenario happened to me. When we got married, my wife was nice and curvy, slightly plump. I loved the way she looked.
She gained about 55-60 lbs over the last 8 years due to many different circumstances, some her fault some not. We used to have sex every day, months on end. Now, she has to keep trying to get me to have sex as I am nowhere near as attracted to her as I was when we first married. I most often either look only at the good parts of her that weight has helped, or imagine fantasies while we have sex.

God, I love this woman though. She is hands down the best person I've ever met and an amazing wife in nearly every other way. We've even talked about this issue, and she understands a lot of the reason there is a lack of sex is because of my attraction to her dimming because of her weight. She has since lost 20 lbs and is working on more, especially once she graduates college this may.

There's the difference though. She realizes I was attracted to her body then and not now. I'm not supposed to change just because her weight changed because in her case it is entirely reversible. This woman needs to realize she lied to her husband by keeping herself a certain shape, hating it and knowing she would stop once they got married. Now its time for her to shape up or ship out, just like she said.

[–]IgnatiusBSamson 20 points21 points22 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I bet she can't fit in a rowboat

[–]mrloree 14 points15 points16 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Dammit Phyllis! I knew it!

[–]Vance87 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Okay, I'll ask. What is HAES?

[–]Sinsilenc 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Health_at_Every_Size

[–]autowikibot 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Health at Every Size:


Health at Every Size (HAES) is an idea that "supports people in adopting health habits for the sake of health and well-being (rather than weight control).". It hopes to remove discrimination of obesity and improve standard of living for people who are overweight. HAES believes that traditional restrictive dieting does not result in sustained weight loss for some people, HAES suggests that this method is not always healthful. Despite significant evidence to the contrary, HAES proposes that health is a result of behaviors that are independent of body weight and submits that societal obsession with thinness does not allow for diversity in body shapes. In particular, HAES claims that being obese is not a problem, contrary to the consensus of the medical community. HAES has recently gained popularity among proponents of the fat acceptance movement as an alternative to weight-loss.

Image i - Obesity has a number of medical complications which negatively impact peoples' quality of life and are costly to treat.


Interesting: List of social movements | Fat feminism | Fat acceptance movement

Parent commenter can toggle NSFW or delete. Will also delete on comment score of -1 or less. | FAQs | Mods | Magic Words

[–]Sarge-Pepper 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Everyone needs to go and actually read this article. This first paragraph is a good description, but the rest of the article is proving it wrong and proving that obesity is something that needs to be dealt with.

It made me very happy to see.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

HAES stands for Healthy At Every Size. The basic premise is; you shouldn't care about being/becoming fat because the consequences are "purely societal". Or, so they say.

[–]holader 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I once saw some comments of a friend of a friend on a doctor about "doctors fat shaming their patents." In which they mean telling you youre unhealthy because you fat is somehow fat shaming. Anywho. I wish i could find it, but i will never forget. "stupid doctor telling me my breathing problems is because im over weight" smh

[–]WordsNotToLiveBy 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Is this another way of saying, "I gave up on trying to stay slim?"

[–]Ulquiorra_Schiffer 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

She's going to get that dude killed.

Not because she's a landwhale and will crush him in sex.

My dad was taking Viagra without a real need, such as ED, other than probably not being sexually attracted to my landwhale mother, and it basically gave him a stroke. It helped contribute to him having a stroke in a major way, other than just high cholesterol, and he had another stroke 2 months ago and died, just over 2 years after the first one.

Her husband taking Viagra without seriously needing it is going to give him a stroke, and her forcing him to do it will mean that it's her fault.

[–]Natrix03 8 points9 points10 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Anyone else realize this is also posted in fatlogic LOL

[–]Blackest_Knight 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

To the husband: EJECT! EJECT! EJECT! Now!

[–]Travyplx 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

She briefly thought of someone other than herself, "I just can't help but feel like I am the one who should change." Fortunately the next sentence she throws that out the window and lives up to the stereotype.

[–]koji8123 8 points9 points10 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Honestly thought this was /r/fatpeoplehate

Seriously what a cunt though. Can't decide whether to cheat or to lose weight.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Looks more like /r/fatlogic or /r/fatpeaoplestories

[–]tallwheel 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

How many subreddits dedicated to making fun of fat people are there?

[–]deschutron 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

She didn't say she was considering cheating. Maybe that last bit was about dumping him and finding someone else.

[–]bsutansalt 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I saw a study a couple years back on ED. They had men come in and sat them down and had a hot woman pretending to be a nurse give them a questionnaire, be a bit flirty, and had a low-cut top. You get the idea. Nearly all of the men who thought they were suffering from ED had no problem getting it up, demonstrating in most of the cases they just weren't being physically turned on by their wives/SOs.

[–]baserace 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Source?

[–]bsutansalt 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I tried to google it, but I can't find it, although I didn't try Google's academic version. If you give it a shot you may have better luck.

[–]verglaze 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Can we put this in r/nottheonion ?

[–]bakedpotato486 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It's not an article, but a user's post. I'd say not.

[–]Stevemacdev 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Any reasonable counsellor will tell her to cut her shit that the problem lies with her.

[–]starbuxed 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Woah, let me say this. I went from 175 lbs a healthy weight for me at 6'1. And gained 55 lbs to be 230 lbs. I was definitely overweight and obese even if I didnt "look" it. I since dropped to 190 lbs. and working to get to 175 again.

A lady, at say the average tallness gaining 65lbs would put her into the morbid obesity category. if she was right in the middle the healthy bmi range.

This is all kinds of unhealthy.

[–]buck54321 18 points19 points20 points 11 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

While this woman is definitely misguided, I don't think that this represents an example of some overarching trend. I guess that there is some aspect of fat-acceptance culture at play.

Fortunately, I don't think a lot of newly-robust wives are drugging their husbands out of denial of their own issues.

[–]IgnatiusBSamson 21 points22 points23 points 11 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

robust

This word means "tough" or "hearty". You're thinking of a word like "stout."

[–]cakebomb4114 35 points36 points37 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

I think he might be looking for "fat"

[–]IgnatiusBSamson 10 points11 points12 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You just made me snort coffee all over my keyboard.

[–]HereHoldMyBeer 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Corpulent maybe?

[–]deltaoutlaw 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Rotund

[–]KnowsAboutMath 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

"A large girl? Big through the hips? Roomy?"

[–]IgnatiusBSamson 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The way he elongates that "r" when he says roomy is just so perfect for Lecter.

[–]blueoak9 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

While this woman is definitely misguided, I don't think that this represents an example of some overarching trend. I guess that there is some aspect of fat-acceptance culture at play.

Gun point fat-acceptance is an overarching trend. Mumia Ali has something to say on the subject: http://www.avoiceformen.com/feminism/consent-for-me-but-not-for-thee-and-other-black-feminist-hypocrisies/

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

While this woman is definitely misguided, I don't think that this represents an example of some overarching trend.

You don't think there's an overarching trend of women getting married and then getting fat as fuck in this country? How come it's joked about all over the mainstream stand up circuit and on T.V. and there's an insane amount of page space dedicated to women in women's magazines talking about how to 'keep the pounds off during marriage' or some shit.

Just as a personal anecdote, my gf gained weight, but she lost it cause she actually gave a shit. My closest friends wife got fat and is still overweight, my other buddy's wife got fat, and a couple other semi-close friends' wives/long term gfs got fat. The guys on the other hand have never been healthier, in fact many of them have lost weight and are in the best shape of their lives.

[–]misterbigtime 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I would see this as a trend overall. Plenty of dudes "let it go" once they're married as well.

[–]raptorrage 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I think it's common for lazy, complacent fucks of both genders to let themselves go. I think people are more forgiving of beer guts

[–]Stephen1985 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Bet if he stopped showering she wouldn't be too pleased.

[–]anddrewg2007 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Where is this from?

[–]outhouse_steakhouse[S] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

It's a comment from a blog called - wait for it - Dances With Fat

[–]pokemon_fetish 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Seems a lot like This is Thin Privilege.

[–]jchriscloud 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You stop running once you catch the bus.....

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[+][deleted] 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I myself am a little overweight and don't expect any woman to be physically attracted to me, and society makes that very clear to me.

But at the same time, society teaches women that men have to be attracted to them no matter what and those who aren't are chauvinist pigs.

Apparently society, and some women, can't seem to grasp simple biology. If you aren't physically good looking then people will most likely not find you physically attractive.

Society tells women "You're beautiful at any size, even if you're a land whale" but at the same time tells men "You have to have a sculpted Olympic swimmer's body for any woman to find you attractive".

I fucking hate society's double standards.

[–]Unenjoyed 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Please tell me that was the open piece to a writer's work shop.

[–]ProfessorViking 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

She didn't "force" him to do anything. His will is his own. Men need to start taking some responsibility as well.

If you find yourself the bitch of a bitch, you have only yourself to blame.

[–]XJXRXVX 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm sure he only has two options in this situation: have sex with the woman he married, or divorce the woman he married. Which sounds more fiscally stable? He has a choice. No one can force feed you drugs. Sure, she can pressure him, but he can also say no. As an adult, you have to make your own decisions.

I'm not sure if I would be clamoring for divorce at this point after years of marriage over something that can be fixed by her returning to her old gym and nutrition standards. At the same time, if I were him, I would at least try to make an effort to throw the old hag a bone every once in a while.

[–]votebot9898 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Saw this on r/fatpeoplehate a while back and I am convinced it is satire. Surely to God no person, male or female, could be this dense. If it is real, it is infuriating, but I highly doubt it.

[–]anobaith 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You would be surprised how dense people can be.

[–]deschutron 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If it's all true,

I lose the most sympathy for her where she says "I exploded at him".

How is that OK?

And you see, afterwards, he does what she wants, and then she's wondering whether it's right. Maybe she wouldn't be wondering if she didn't explode at him, and instead said her thing more calmly, and tried not to scare him out of responding.

[–]rockSWx 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

They call being a fat fuck "starting HAES"?

[–]nick012000 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

"Healthy at every size". So, yes, pretty much.

[–]rockSWx 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

oh I know what it means, my beef was that she acts like shes beginning something when its the exact opposite

[–]skinninja 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

i... i thought this was not a real post until /u/sweetiepiejonas posted those links.... that poor poor man.. death by snoosnoo.

also..how the hell do you reach a size where your shirt size is N/A??? Drapes??

[–]-Kato 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I really feel sorry for the guy, watching the woman he loved almost double in size to the point where he needs chemical assistance to sustain an erection. The kicker is, viagra only works if you are already aroused.

[–]scanspeak 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

90% of married American men will experience the same outcome. Stay single brothers.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

never seen such a fantastic argument against marriage in my life. thanks, lady!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

Throat cancer really fucked me over bad in the face and neck. I lost all my teeth and the surgery removed everything non-essential in my neck from my earlobes to my clavicle. I look like shit now.

My wife is stunning and this really concerned me knowing that I would look profoundly worse after my treatment. She's not superficial at all but no one wants to be married to an ogre.

That woman never missed a beat and not once has she ever told me I look anything less than perfect. She moped around when I had my teeth removed because it hurt too much to kiss her. She's never made me feel any lesser of a person because of how I look now. Granted I had no real choice, if I didn't have the surgery and treatments I had less than a year to live, but she's made sure it never affected our marriage.

I know the OP's posting concerned weight gain that could be controlled but damn...if that guy only sees poundage on his wife then she married the wrong damn dude.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree with you man. Marriage in my opinion has a couple of major tenets including: you fuck your spouse and you don't cheat. You got to do what you have to do to keep things going. There are things he could do and there are things she could do (losing weight being the most obvious but there are other options too)

That woman never missed a beat and not once has she ever told me I look anything less than perfect.

That is amazing, and she is doing what a good wife should be doing; but do you think this is the truth? If you could adjust your lifestyle slightly and get back to way you originally looked before cancer (which I'm sorry about, I lost my best friend to leukemia -- cancer really sucks) she wouldn't ask you to make that slight lifestyle change? Especially if you lived that lifestyle before you got married? She wouldn't be upset if you went full on and joined the "looking like an ogre is great, fuck all y'all" club?

if that guy only sees poundage on his wife then she married the wrong damn dude.

Poundage here means: "she lied to me before we got married". It means: "she doesn't give a fuck about me or herself". It means: "food is more important than our sex life". It means: "lazy, delusional, uneducated". All of which is pretty unattractive if you ask me.

[–]porkmaster 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You're comparing something you had no control over at all to something she has complete control over.

[–]dungone 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

So you want to swap wives with him? I don't see your point. Surely if there was a "book of rules" that got rid of your cancer and restored your body, you'd be all over it like any sane person would.

If your own wife saw that you were giving yourself throat cancer on purpose, she might end up having issues with that. And were you so ignorant of your condition that you walked up to her and said, "babe we used to have sex every day, what the hell is wrong with you these days?," I think you'd be in for a little bit of a reality check. There are limits, even to love.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

There are limits, even to love.

Depending on how shallow you are.

None of your reply is anything more than straw man arguments and Captain Obvious restatements.

[–]dungone 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Depending on how shallow you are.

Yes, depending. Also depending on how selfish, lazy, and ignorant the other person is.

None of your reply is anything more than straw man arguments

You have absolutely no idea what a straw man is.

if that guy only sees poundage on his wife then she married the wrong damn dude.

Now there's a strawman for you. Point of fact, OP describes her husband as someone wiling to bend over backwards due to love. Reality is that OP is an entitled, self-absorbed glutton who is having difficulty coming to terms with the fact that the problem is with her own attitude. She wants to have her cake and eat it too.

[–]baserace -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Excellent comment and some much needed context in this thread.

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Install a glory hole at home, problem solved

[–]konoplya 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

dude... if this is true, its so wrong and the husband deserves it if he succumbed to that crazy person's will

[–]deschutron 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

What could he have done to avoid it?

[–]konoplya 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

get a divorce...

[–]Introvariant 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

This doesn't belong here. Don't get me wrong, I like to take the man's side in gender divided issues just as much as the next guy. Also, I do happen to side with the man in this instance. But this isn't an issue of gender rights.

This just looks like a middle aged couple having middle aged couple problems. Your use of "forces" in the title is extremely sensationalist. The woman is clearly conflicted. She recognizes that she may be in the wrong and is asking for advice.

[–]ProphetChuck 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree with you!

[–]Bearded_Deity 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Basically, this sounds to me like the typical feminist aproach. In stead of saying, hey, maybe my "wonderful, supportive, handsome husband" has a point?

Personally I think that if you REALLY love someone, you will want to stay attractive for them; i.e. healthy, in shape, etc (whatever it is you find attractive about them, they should try to maintain, even if it isn't weight or size related.)

For example, my fiancee WANTS to continue looking good, not just for me, but also for herself and her own confidence. I personally WANT to maintain a healthy weight, and stay attractive for her, and myself. Because I love me and I love her!

[–]misterbigtime -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Does this belong here? What does this have to do with mens rights? Is there some context I'm missing? I don't agree with the outcome of the story but that's irrelevant.

What was the original article?

[edit]

Found the source comment.

This comment is a perfectly reasonable reply:

I’m so sorry that this is happening to you. I would be in way over my head to give advice here other than to say that I would suggest that the two of you definitely get some counseling sooner rather than later, and maybe work separately as well as together. I believe that you are beautiful just as you are. Good luck,

~Ragen

[–]Megacannon88 -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I'm pretty disappointed with the overall comments in this thread. I don't see a Men's Rights issue here. Guys, everyone deserves a good, hard fucking. In a healthy marriage, each spouse deserves sexual fulfillment. This guy seems to love his wife enough to try to please her. There is nothing wrong with this.

[–]deschutron 5 points6 points7 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Which right is stronger:

  1. the right to have fulfilling sex, or

  2. the right to avoid unfulfilling sex?

[–]deschutron 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

This pair of rights is a point on a spectrum:

  1. fulfilling sex vs. unfulfilling sex

  2. wanted sex vs. unwanted sex

  3. consented-to sex vs. non-consented-to sex (rape)

[–]aeolian_knight[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

!logic

[–]Pentagod 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

top ticks are troll trolls. Enjoy...

[–]txroller 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

/r/fatpeoplehate would enjoy this

[+][deleted] 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]KindaSmekt 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yup.

[–]SilasDG 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"we are setting up some counseling sessions"

Aren't counseling sessions meant to help find the root of a problem? I think she's already found it.

[–]YesAllCrayons 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

My guess is that this "rulebook" carries more dust than she's letting on

[–]GayLubeOil 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Plot twist: She is a female bear preparing for hibernation.

[–]intensely_human 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

From the headline I assumed she got some kind of court order. As it actually turns out she didn't make him to anything.

[–]the-tominator 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

...or should I find someone else who doesn't consider making love to me a chore?

Good luck with that you fuck. Only problem is, your husband sounds rather good and you won't get anyone decent now that you're a planet.

At least he could then go and get a woman who considers his happiness as more important than that 4th helping of desert. She'd be all lonely and finally realise that very few people like fat women because we all want healthy partners for biological reasons, and are attracted to fit healthy people. She will then either become hateful and horrible (e.g. Dworkin) and we'll hear from her again. Or she'll finally loose some (it'll need to be a lot by then) weight.

So I hope she does leave him, he sounds nice and she sounds like a selfish cow. He's obviously in love with her but clearly she just treats him like he owes her everything and she owes him nothing.

This was really depressing to read, but her sheer level of sociopathy made it at least a bit amusing.

Seriously, don't do this people! If you get a car at the showroom and it's a nice convertible ( http://www.carsbase.com/photo/BMW-Z4_mp2_pic_10009.jpg ) that's great fun to drive, and then a few months later it turns into a people-carrier ( http://www.carsbase.com/photo/Fiat-Multipla_mp21_pic_35079.jpg ). You're going to feel short-changed! This is how your partner will feel if you let yourself go, and it isn't good!

[–]criss990 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

This is the highest ranked post on a subreddit about rights? How is this about men's rights at all? Posts like this ruin any credibility MRAs or egalitarians gain (and im speaking as an egalitarian btw)

[–]Llebac 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Here come the downvotes.

You are completely right.

[–]anobaith 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Egalitarianism is over rated if it becomes a chain around the MRM necks. The MRM is the MRM. If you want to advocate fat, obese pig acceptance, go to a fat, obese pig acceptance community.

P.S

The people that would "look down on the MRM credibility", already hate us, so it does not matter. They hate the fact that the MRM is "too straight", "too right wing oriented", "too Caucasian", and has "too many Christian roots". There is a certain power in being hated, a certain liberation that cannot be truly measured.

Remember, people often hate those that they envy, while praise those they wish to control.

[–]AppropriateTouching -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

He's making the choice, she's not forcing him to do anything. She's fucked up and unreasonable I agree, but shes not forcing him to do anything.

[–]drinkthebleach 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

/r/thatHappened

[–]darkshine05 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Shouldn't she just loos weight?

[–]baserace 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Richer, poorer, sickness, health, etc. Get married, know the deal.

I feel sorry for both of them.

[–]outhouse_steakhouse[S] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Source

[–]genderbent -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

this doesn't look like a gender politics issue to me, this just seems like a tragic case of two people's lives taking them in different directions.

[+]BruceCampbell123 -6 points-5 points-4 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

This is fucking rape.

[–]Winter_of_Discontent 7 points8 points9 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

He's clearly consenting. Don't make us as bad as them.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

What bullshit. She should TRY to find someone better.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I know exactly one couple who have been married for 20 years who are undeniably happy married--they still shower together every morning and leave love notes for each other.

The rest, who aren't already divorced probably should be.

What does this have to do with weight gain? Nothing, and that's the point.

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