How long did your divorce take?

Clean_Fly_3748 · 2025-03-30T11:33:47+00:00

15 months. We had equal salaries and went through a guardian ad litem process (custody battle and the recommendation was joint custody) so there was NO reason for it yo take as long as it did. But, she tried every trick in the book (I.e, false domestic violence claim) and nothing worked. Judge saw through it all and told her to settle out of court. It was a sweet victory for me, but at the end of the day, divorce is rough on kids.

IvoShandor · 2025-03-27T09:45:33+00:00

1 year of official separation, then 1.5 years from divorce filing to court approval.

streetsmartwallaby · 2025-03-29T04:07:20+00:00

Ten months. Would have been a year if we’d gone to court but she tested positive for illegal drugs (i.e. not just marijuana / alcohol) so her attorney told her to settle or she’d get her ass kicked in court.

the_money_meatsack · 2025-03-28T06:55:49+00:00

Quite a varied amount in this thread... I guess it depends on situation and complexity of the divorce.

I (39m) and getting divorced from my wife (37f), we have 2 children, own our family house and are amicable which has helped the most. Also based in the UK.

Divorce application submission 29/10/24 Court date: 04/04/25 Hoping to have all paperwork in place to get it finalised and concluded in April 25.

So 6 months ish

Pretend_Line6688 · 2025-03-27T21:12:31+00:00

From filing to getting the final judgement almost 6 Mo's exactly. But in my situation, I moved out, no kids, I didn't fight over anything, let her keep the pets & the house. We didn't use lawyers I just walked away. Only thing that even made it get to a judge was I changed my mind and wanted to modify our mediation agreement.

DaveTheDrummer802 · 2025-03-27T20:24:42+00:00

Im not in the process yet, but I assume we will split everything down the middle. Our salaries are almost equal. I will have no alimony, minimal/no child support. I am willing to bet the kids end up with me more than with her.

Automatic-Ratio-435 · 2025-03-27T18:39:23+00:00

14 long and excruciating months.

Dry-Celebration7870 · 2025-03-27T12:33:15+00:00

6 months. She did not utter a word against me or for any alimony when we gave the full reality of her behaviour..!!

deadBeefCafe2014 · 2025-03-27T11:57:40+00:00

Just under 6 months from filing to closure.

The shit sandwich to get there was a saga, however.

Gockdaw · 2025-03-27T08:58:41+00:00

Four long and painful years.

I live in Ireland though so everything is broken and shit.

Also, my ex wanted and still wants things to be stuck in a state of never changing, because she's a parasite and it was always her plan to live off divorce.

dfb54749014 · 2025-03-27T04:55:25+00:00

Pretty amicable divorce after almost 17 years. She kept/refinanced the house and paid me 50% of the equity. No marital debt. I kept my personal accounts, and she kept hers. We split retirement/401K accounts, joint accounts, etc. 2 teenagers involved, we have joint physical and legal custody of, 50/50 split.

Took just shy of 11 months to finalize.

Conscious-Ad-7338 · 2025-03-27T04:21:56+00:00

The process seems to take exactly as long as it takes until you are bled dry and cant take any more. It takes just as much as you are willing to give for your kids and how hard you are willing to fight for. What a divorce court miracle, and one of divorce courts great mysteries. That's the timetable you can expect, and precisely how much you can expect to pay your lawyer and the courts

masterof-xe · 2025-03-27T03:14:03+00:00

4 months

Signal-Dot2326 · 2025-03-27T02:09:40+00:00

The actual filing date it's been 22 months but the marriage has been over for 28 months, hell we've been in the divorce process now LONGER than we were married pre filing lol

Icerunner45 · 2025-03-27T01:32:31+00:00

What are the things that most people fight over? We should finish the custody hearing in the JDR court a couple months before we can file for divorce in the circuit court. I don’t understand why it would drag on so long?

PanchoVilla212 · 2025-03-27T01:28:47+00:00

Filed in June 2022. Finalized February 2023. No kids. No property. NY. 8 year marriage. We did it thru online system, she didn’t want anything. No lawyers. Spent about $450 total. GOD bless her.

Delicious_Walrus_370 · 2025-03-27T01:23:35+00:00

3 weeks

regertsrus · 2025-03-27T00:12:14+00:00

In my 4th year with a pathological liar. In over 3 years we got nowhere in court but i managed to take my kids back 50% of the time and move back to within 1 mile with my new blended family. Doing well here. Please remember the term "court clerk circle jerk". It explains this chess game the legal system imposes

Pemeal_Kid · 2025-03-27T00:07:28+00:00

Just under 4 years. She took as long as she could. Then complained about the overall time frame. But best thing that happened to me! Worth the wait to see her face when I shut her down for stupid things. Some 50 year old kids will never learn!!

redragtop99 · 2025-03-26T23:59:31+00:00

Been at it 29 months, trial set for 4/30 will make it 30.

She thinks I have a bunch of hidden bitcoin. I disclosed all of it and she writes on her FDS “XX Bitcoin checks acquired “Together” and 2016 for date and in value she writes (no joke) “$X.X Million” STBX and I never bought any crypto together ever and yes I had some in 2016, doesn’t mean I still do. 6 year marriage, no kids, she made $30k gross in 6 years. She did not mention any crypto on her first FDS filed in early 2023. This is a month before trial and she’s produced 0 evidence (none exists as it didn’t happen). Oh and we were married in August 2016. Her lawyer filed this with the court!

sunkill · 2025-03-26T23:33:05+00:00

7 months. Should have let it go on longer

i80west · 2025-03-26T23:15:17+00:00

We each got our own lawyer. I pushed mine to move forward to file and get on court schedules, with no time spent on consultation or reconciliation. I put together settlement proposals, with the help of my lawyer. I got the impression he would have gone slower if I'd left it to him, not because he was dragging it out but because he was busy and had other cases besides mine. I also think some couples spend time talking about it, reconsidering, arguing, and generally wasting time. We got the order 9 months after filing. It was another 2-3 months after that before the QDRO was done to split the retirement accounts the way we'd agreed to.

Burn_Baby_Burn237 · 2025-03-26T23:14:38+00:00

I don’t know yet, let you know soon though. Ex already filed in like February. I filed my answer couple weeks after. We are pretty much in agreement on everything. So I’d assume it should be smooth sailing from here.

Neither one of us used lawyers, we filed all paperwork ourselves. I literally just copy and pasted her initial filing in my answer because I didn’t disagree with anything.

Substantial_Bar_8476 · 2025-03-26T22:39:41+00:00

All depends on how much you fight over things

Pro-IDGAF · 2025-03-26T19:53:33+00:00

april 2019 to november 2019

filed ourselves and had it nearly done but someone put a bug in her ear about spousal support, that she didnt even want in the first place. she lawyered up in july/august. so i did.

pretty easy really and would have been over sooner if my lawyer wasnt a POS lazy fuck. i fired him and represented myself the last 2 months

ex was pretty fair really and we didnt disagree on much, considering we had a paid for house, my business that she left alone. we split up the cash and gold outside the system. bank money was the same. no children under 18.

cschoonmaker · 2025-03-26T17:37:40+00:00

Aug 2012 - Told me she wanted a Divorce

Jan 2013 - Served with court papers for a "Legal Separation", shows she actually filed in early Jan. (No idea why it took 5 months when her parents paid for a divorce attorney for her after we agreed to do it without attorneys)

March 2017 - Divorce finalized.

so 4 years 7 months I guess. Initially told me she wanted a divorce, but then filed for "Legal Separation" instead. Never explained why the change. I'm assuming it was because she wanted to stay on my healthcare plan that I paid for. My filed response was to petition for divorce. Everything was pretty much done by summer of 2014 but after completing the Bankruptcy process mandated by the court, her attorney just kind of sat on everything. I'm guessing she wanted to help keep her on my healthcare plan by not officially finalizing the divorce.

That's when I got petty. I tried asking my Ex about what was going on. She didn't respond. Got a letter from her attorney basically forbidding me from contacting my Ex about our Divorce and that ALL contact was to go through her. I attempted to contact the attorney multiple times about finalizing the divorce and got delay after delay. Then I got an email from my former father in law telling me to not contact his daughters attorney anymore because they were being charged every time I did. I replied back and told him that per HIS daughters attorney, I was to direct ANY contact regarding our divorce proceedings to her and not contact my Ex. I then began calling her attorney once a day for a couple months. Guessing they got hit with a big bill and decided it would be cheaper for them to pay for independant healthcare than the attorney fees. Divorce was finalized shortly after.

dcsouthbay · 2025-03-26T17:19:17+00:00

2 yrs. Lots of legal bullshit

Expert-Raccoon6097 · 2025-03-26T17:15:44+00:00

1 week. Agreed on everything, filed ourselves.

Was shocked how quickly it went. 22 years and 2 kids, the lives of 4 people erased in 7 days. It was wild.

OctinoxateAndZinc · 2025-03-26T17:03:03+00:00

Process (them saying they wanted a divorce) in Oct 2022. They moved out Nov 22. I was an idiot and spent 6 months trying to save things but eventually filed in May 23. Separation of income in Oct 23 and then thing finally got rolling.

STILL ongoing but in home stretch. Hope to be done by this summer.

Lawyer cost: 30k as of today

Wacodunk · 2025-03-26T17:00:24+00:00

Officially it took a day: did a simple dissolution of marriage Mentally and physically: it'll be three years in July since it officially ended but I feel the pain and hurt everyday

No kids but got left with two dogs and a cat she abandoned along with me

MaxViewingAngle · 2025-03-26T16:25:17+00:00

About a year. Kids grown and out

FADITY7559 · 2025-03-26T16:03:43+00:00

3 long years

HerbEverstanks · 2025-03-26T15:10:46+00:00

3.5 years no kids. 3 judges. 4 of her lawyers. Didn't cooperate with anything. All we had to do was determine :

"spousal support" (8.5 years for a 10 year marraige) over 500k Split medical and personal debt Get my name off the house which I lost 100% of that Get my name off her car which I lost 100% of that Split 401k. Got 100% of mine and none of hers.

Took another year for her to do what was in the order. 4 more years of paying her.

I could have figured this out in 5 minutes.

gabbygourmet · 2025-03-26T15:00:12+00:00

19 mos.

still living together

divorced though

CaliDude75 · 2025-03-26T14:57:25+00:00

Pretty much the state mandated minimum. 6 months. No kids in my case, and avoided discovery. I just cut to the chase with my negotiations.

Regular_Finish7409 · 2025-03-26T14:23:08+00:00

Nine months for me.

LoveCrispApples · 2025-03-26T14:11:08+00:00

131 days. Bomb drop to D-day.

superman_410 · 2025-03-26T14:07:07+00:00

3 months👍

Ladiesman94952 · 2025-03-26T14:06:07+00:00

22 years .... too late

bes753 · 2025-03-26T14:02:58+00:00

Filed August 2022, finalized in mediation August 2024. We had a brief, disastrous period of trying to reconcile somewhere in the middle.

jimsmythee · 2025-03-26T13:54:16+00:00

11 months. Divorce’s in AZ go fast. From “date served to temporary orders meeting to mediation to trial to decree in hand. 9 months.

Aggravating-Ad-5793 · 2025-03-26T13:46:54+00:00

Four years. Everytime we had a deal, she would back out at the last minute.

condortheboss · 2025-03-26T13:31:22+00:00

1.5 years still ongoing because I lack the funds to fight her properly in court. She took both kids and has been lying about my treatment of them prior and after separation so I'm on damage control more than divorce progress

SelectionNo3078 · 2025-03-26T13:14:14+00:00

October 2021 she said she had no attraction for me on any level

December 2021 I moved out (lived back at home most weekends as we we’re supposedly trying to work it out)

June 2022 she said she’s done and wants divorce

August 2022 met w attorney to discuss collaborative divorce

June 2023 signed paperwork to move forward

April 2024 had mediation

August 2024 finalized.

Turns out there are some women that are attracted to me on several levels

But

I’d still try to reconcile if she wanted to

That’s my family. It would still be worth trying to save

sleeptokensucks · 2025-03-26T13:09:48+00:00

2 weeks. Ex and I agreed to divorce immediately. No kids, didn’t need the court to divide assets / property as we agreed prior to filing.

anon4hlp · 2025-03-26T13:05:29+00:00

Three long years...

DietznutzCA · 2025-03-26T12:59:33+00:00

2 years from filing to judgement for me as well. “It will only go as fast as the least reasonable person.” Is what someone had said to me and it was true in my case. I thought nah it won’t be like because we can both be reasonable. But nope. She was a vengeful bitch the entire process.

Slowloris81 · 2025-03-26T12:49:08+00:00

2.5 years from my filing to judgment.

dave2118 · 2025-03-26T12:37:30+00:00

I’ve been divorced twice, both times took exactly 60 days, the state minumum.

No lawyers the second time. I’d say I’ve been really lucky.

leaving4me · 2025-03-26T12:17:27+00:00

Every circumstance is unique to itself and ALL of the individual parties involved, including the court. That said, I filed at the end of September, she got a continuance. Then she changed attorneys causing a conflict of interest and the judge recusing themselves. The visiting judge put us on the rocket docket and we will be done by the first week of June whether because she comes to her senses or we go to court.

Title	How long did your divorce take?
Author	frogmicky
Upvotes	18
Comments	102
Date	March 26, 2025 11:54 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1jk9y7t/how_long_did_your_divorce_take/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-long-did-your-divorce-take.1547676 https://theredarchive.com/post/1547676

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