If relationships are more valuable than wealth, then women have the most privilege

gofigure62 · 2021-04-12T18:26:33+00:00

Loving relationships are hard to come by. Many people hetero or straight are in dysfunctional relationships.

Having a healthy and loving relationship is a level of success that some people never experience.

Having access to relationships doesn't automatically mean access to mutually beneficial, healthy, or loving relationships.

thirdridge · 2021-04-12T19:43:39+00:00

Women are not less likely to be single. Men and women are about 50-50 in number and the vast majority of relationships are monogamous and heterosexual. For every women that is in a relationship, there is obviously a man in a relationship (that same relationship). So men and women are equally likely to be single.

It gets complicated, however, when sexual relationships become more 'liquid' (serial monogamy, fuck buddies, hookup culture) due to uneven distributions of sexual intimacy. Men (and almost all other mammalian males) have a higher reproductive variance, which means there is greater disparity between the most sexually successful and unsuccessful males than there is between the most sexually successful and unsuccessful females. The inverse-power-law distribution that describes the allocation of sexual resources to the opposite sex is significantly sharper for men than for women.

DaBlockObama · 2021-04-12T17:44:41+00:00

Men in general do not make more money. The vast majority of people work for an hourly wage that is the same for men and women.

WestsideMoonWalker · 2021-04-12T17:53:48+00:00

I mean, if the choice is..... being able to support myself OR having some weird mythical relationship, I'm going to choose to support myself every time. At some level, wealth/money/resources and human relationships aren't even in the same order of needs. I'd argue that ability to support one's self but no relationship > having perfect relationships, but inability to support yourself. I'd also argue that ability to support yourself and earn wealth + having good relationships with people > excess wealth, but the math will change depending on the person.

Humans are social creatures, so at some level, once your base individual needs are met, you also want to have your social needs met as well. Just because I value having fulfilling relationships with those around me (and friendships for that matter), that doesn't mean I DON'T value my ability to support myself/earn money/build wealth. It just means that there's an inflection point where it flips.

Note: Also yes, there's other things that I and many others value more than money or relationships.

Otter-Incognito · 2021-04-12T17:46:14+00:00

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GrandRub · 2021-04-12T18:54:18+00:00

the question wasnt about "any relationship" - but about a perfect relationship... and i dont think women are privileged there.

abcdxyzx · 2021-04-12T17:43:11+00:00

Additionally, it is a lot easier for a woman to say “I want” and point to a man and essentially get him like that instead of having to attempt any kind of game or anything like that. Makes them confident from and early age and keeps rejections way so the fee fees don’t hurt

MisterShogunate · 2021-04-13T01:01:47+00:00

“Loving relationship” is a loaded term. Women have access to quantity of potential relationships, but a huge portion of that are just bad relationships.

StrengthAndHealth · 2021-04-12T19:57:46+00:00

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flapperfemmefatale · 2021-04-12T17:56:29+00:00

That's pretty narrow, because there's a ton of things I value more than either money or a relationship.

PsychologicalEbb9953 · 2021-04-12T18:41:36+00:00

Whats the advantage of having the “privilige” of being able to get into relationships easier if the men dont want to in the first place😂😂 Most women want to get into stable and loving relationships while men fantasise about drilling as many as possible- how can you compare privilige when both genders want different things?

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2021-04-12T20:12:30+00:00

This is the same mistake in argument the pro-lifers, Black Pillians, etc make. The conclusion does not follow because the premises are incoherent. The argument from potential does hold here.

Relationships come in steps, phases, and psychological feelings (emotions), bonds in a matter of degree, complexity and duration.

I'll pose to examples:

Ex; 1 fetuses terminated at X stage do not contain the necessary attributes to be terminated at any other stage other than the necessary attributes present. The same applies here:

Ex; 2 You cannot proceed to the next step lacking what is necessary to do so. (Ex; 'sluts lacking the necessary attributes to be LTR material').

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The ability for a woman to attract a man, is not an ability/potential to "have good relationship," - it is the ABILITY to proceed to the next step, which entails a number of other complexities in the matter of degree, stage, etc.. that must be passed.

A better argument, is women are almost always ELIGIBLE to participate; not almost always eligible to get good relationships. It does not follow that eligibility = 'overall privileged in life'.

--

Even if this were the case, your premise does not account for QAULITY of life (re: all in which are not JUST relationship dependent). Your argument is also built around 'values' which are person-dependent in nature. It would be better if you instead posed that relationships objectively optimize life quality - but it still does not follow just relationships are needed for high quality of life and does not account for dysfunction, it does not follow that women are more privileged, it follows that women harbor a capacity to be eligible for dysfunction or extract possible privilege and nothing else - which is not determined on the basis of female but is determined by a host of other variables unrelated to relationships themselves. This means it is situation-dependent (negative utilitarian), not 'relationship' dependent.

SaBahRub · 2021-04-12T17:50:57+00:00

I thought men were the gatekeepers of relationships?

-WolfieMcq · 2021-04-12T20:37:52+00:00

I would rather have money. That´s harsh, I know, but money is tangibly useful in a way that being loved is not. My various musical instruments were bought with money, not love. If my back or neck are out, I pay an osteopath in money, not love.

mangolover97 · 2021-04-12T23:15:39+00:00

Wealth is more valuable than relationships. You can use wealth to buy a relationship much easier than you can use love to acquire wealth.

NarniaFox · 2021-04-13T05:04:50+00:00

Women tend to have more options for casual sex, not for LTRs/marriage. Men are thirstier, but it doesn't necessarily make them interested in having a family.

And, well, you aren't totally honest. Of course people would choose an ideal relationships over any sum of money. But in real life people don't have this kind of choice and ideal relationships are unattainable for both men and women.

Flightlessbirbz · 2021-04-12T21:31:17+00:00

Women don’t have more privilege when it comes to finding relationships. Only casual sex. More women are interested in relationships than men, so the relationship market is skewed in men’s favor. Also, relationships =/= love, at least not always lasting love.

superlurkage · 2021-04-12T21:50:43+00:00

Bad relationships are expensive, wasteful, damaging, and deleterious to your physical and mental health

KFC_Fleshlight · 2021-04-12T22:56:45+00:00

You could argue it’s harder as a female to get a meaningful relationship. Guys will lie about themselves just to trick a woman for the sole person of having sex with them. How are you as a girl meant to weed through all the dicks and pick the right person. The ratio of shit options to good options is much worse for a woman. Guys might have fewer options but the options they do have are a much better ratio for true compatibility.

Women have it easier to have sex but that doesn’t necessarily coincide with having a meaningful relationship.

flamingoinghome · 2021-04-12T23:01:40+00:00

Is it really privilege, or is it putting in the work? That's what men ask when it's a financial question. Are men simply more likely to be work shy when it comes to relationships?

ThunderbearIM · 2021-04-12T20:03:43+00:00

Women have an easier time finding relationships, not loving relationships.

If you mix up those two things then of course you can conclude that women have the most privilege, but you're forgetting that abusive, cold and boring relationships are a part of "Relationships", but are very specifically excluded from "Loving relationships".

aquariuskitty_ · 2021-04-12T18:33:21+00:00

Women don’t have an easier time in relationships they just have different issues than men. Men are expected to be the initiator and for socially awkward men their desire to meet women is set against their struggles to communicate interest and their discomfort with social settings. Women on the other hand have no issue receiving attention from the opposite sex. Women are not conditioned to approach men. Some do, but those women come to face their own social stigmas: being perceived as whorish or desperate. Additionally women don’t enjoy all of this attention bc it doesn’t just stop at finding dates. Just walking down the street women have to deal with cat calls, leering eyes, being groped, upskirted and followed. Not to mention the verbal and physical abuse that can result from rejecting these advances. Then there’s the often ignored experience of women who are not ‘conventionally attractive’ who are described as ugly, disgusting land whales by men. Women who are so ‘unappealing’ that men grumble they ought to be ‘grateful’ for their approach after they’ve tried to get with her, assuming she’d be an ‘easy lay’ out of projected desperation. Some ‘unconventionally attractive’ women who approach men are mocked for it and seen as desperate. Sometimes the same men who bemoan superficiality in women behave in the exact same way when placed in that position.

I think it’s pretty obvious that men have been and still are the dominant group in society. That being said, there are advantages and disadvantages to both genders in terms of relationships... but the disadvantages for women tend to be a lot more severe (intimate partner violence, rape, murder, harassment, stalking, etc)

WanWhiteWolf · 2021-04-12T20:26:20+00:00

You have a point but there are some things that you have to consider:

There is little risk of a man choosing career. That is, on average, you are going to be financially set. The only difference is the extent; but regardless of that, there are no many ways you can generally "fail". That's not the case in reverse. Many women invest a lot of time in their relationships and they don't work out. If you are a woman in mid 30', no career, your general future might look more grim than a man on mid 30' with career but single.
If a woman finds happiness, it's very likely that whoever finds happiness with, is also happy. Hence the number of men and women finding happiness is probably similar.
I don't think women have an easier time getting relationships. They can, for sure, do it in their 20', but not later. The tables reverse from 30' to the end of life. That's of course a relative/ biased view, but I do think that a man in his mid 30' has more options of getting into relationship than a woman at the same age (assuming all else is equal).

Overall the woman has a higher chance of having a "perfect balance". That is : have some fun in her early 20. Mid 20' find someone wealthy and marry.

Overall the man has a higher chance of having a "good balance". That is: focus on career on early 20. Starting from 30' find someone you like and marry.

Of course, this is a "stereotypical" scenario where both maximize their potential. Men pay with their 20' to have a reliable future. Women don't have to do that but if they miss their shot, they will be in less better spot than their counterpart.

Master-Edward-3 · 2021-04-12T21:01:55+00:00

Yes of course.. I don’t even understand how anyone finds the contrary. The female experience (9/10 because you have anomalies..)throughout life is far more comfortable than the male experience. Your species like most others also has the female wellbeing more well kept in mind. Put two people in danger and who’s more likely to be sacrificed for the others life? The man or the woman assuming you can only rescue one? It’s in the media and on songs. How much men appreciate and desire women but barely ever the reverse and if a female artist is singing about a man it’s usually shit talking fuck your versed. How they better without and moved on etc.. Women indeed have more privilege than men and I do not even know what advantages men have aside from strength and the ability to competently excel in business.

Low-Focus-3879 · 2021-04-12T21:46:49+00:00

Bullshit. I have NO problem getting laid. But getting an actual relationship? It's kind of amazing how many men have a "fear of commitment." There's a reason more men report being single than women in most studies. Because they consider everything short of an engagement "hanging out"

For a woman, getting laid may be easy but getting into a committed relationship? It's easier to do a Rubix cube blindfolded.

ItWasAlwaysOver · 2021-04-12T23:33:50+00:00

i dont think men really have an easier time making money. if they do, it's nowhere near to the same extent that women find getting relationships easier than men. the main reason men make money is because it's expected of them. men are human doings, women are human doings.

Otter-Incognito · 2021-04-12T18:52:02+00:00

You're not wrong but this assumes that wealth is the main form of privilege. What about safety, comfort and health? Because women are better off than men along these axes too.

michael1962-01 · 2021-04-12T18:02:18+00:00

Women are nowhere the gatekeeper of commitment or relationship.

So the leverage is at men.

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TodTheRod01 · 2021-04-12T23:25:28+00:00

Men make more money because they work more hours, chose jobs that pay better or work more dangerous jobs...

Big reasons being men are competitive, natural interests and that no women want dudes making shitty salary

-WolfieMcq · 2021-04-13T00:37:42+00:00

Easier? Without giving any specific details away-the approach men have to meeting a woman is not what I call respectful and how they go about it—if I give details it will teach men how to fake it and game play—so I won’t. The huge majority of men behave in a certain way. Those kind have absolutely no chance with me-im told many of these men are interested in me—but no- leaving me to evade and avoid FOR MY OWN GOOD.

Don’t pretend it’s about numbers and we just have more. It’s about how men are these days. And you can only blame yourselves.

JulesB954 · 2021-04-13T14:55:42+00:00

I don't think it's necessarily a gender issue on who is at an advantage when it comes to relationships; it's whoever is perceived as high value. Average individuals who don't have the same degree of looks, money, and status, need to work a little harder to obtain a relationship as they have fewer options. If the OP is referring to casual sex, then hands down women have the advantage, but for long term relationships, I don't think any gender really has an easier time.

2021-04-13T21:47:25+00:00

obviously women have more privileged in the "sexual market" and "sexual market value" plus hypergamy.

and on the flip side for males one study showed a 5'6 man would need to make something like 250k a year to be comparable to a 6'4 male who isnt employed.

ThrowawayCOVID999 · 2021-04-15T06:18:39+00:00

Who knows, women and other bloopers can’t even keep their bullshit platitudes straight.

2021-04-17T00:36:05+00:00

"most people would chose to be loved rather than be given a lump sum of money."

Men don't love women tho. Men use us for sex and a mommy mcbangmaid if they can get away with it. Women only access love from other women.

If relationships are more valuable than wealth, then women have the most privilege

Comments

NotAllMen !!!!!!!!

Title	If relationships are more valuable than wealth, then women have the most privilege
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	92
Comments	319
Date	April 12, 2021 5:41 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/mpj1mj/if_relationships_are_more_valuable_than_wealth/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-relationships-are-more-valuable-than-wealth.1188757 https://theredarchive.com/post/1188757