Q4M: would you rather date a young naive, gullible woman or a young mature confident woman? Why?

Gravel_Roads · 2024-05-27T14:59:48+00:00

I’m 40, so it’s really depends on what you mean by “young”. Anyone under 30 feels inexperienced and too easily impressed to suit my crusty standards.

If I had to take one, B. But I’d rather someone who’s been around the block a few times like I have.

AstronautExisting230 · 2024-05-27T18:00:07+00:00

A,

I wanna explore the world with a girl and have new experiences like traveling or exploring new places. I don't wanna date a girl that has massive amount of travel or knowledge experiences because its probably not gonna be something new for her (and I love making people happy and enjoy new experiences).

KayRay1994 · 2024-05-27T14:57:44+00:00

B, no question

BrainMarshal · 2024-05-27T15:28:13+00:00

I married B.

harmonica2 · 2024-05-27T14:59:55+00:00

Definitely the second one because I want my SO to love me and want me for me and not because she is naive and gullible.

krackedy · 2024-05-27T14:54:21+00:00

B for sure. Confidence is attraction.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-05-27T15:35:08+00:00

B all day. I want to get to know someone interesting

Lovers691 · 2024-05-27T15:17:34+00:00

A, I don't have much dating/relationship experience so it would be nice to date someone like me

Windmill_flowers · 2024-05-27T15:17:23+00:00

Option B: Someone being confident and secure in themselves will just come across better. I don't how or why, its just that people who are confident and secure in themselves generally come across better IRL.

However, this is all dependent on how you interpret these things. If in your example "confident and secure" means they are going to start shit and be competitive for no reason because they are a "Strong Independentz womanz", then no. Option A as there is no choice C.

wtknight · 2024-05-27T15:10:04+00:00

Young mature confident woman. All else equal, I would choose the woman whom I could have more intelligent conversations with. Trying to interact with unintelligent women is bothersome, and I need to have strong feelings for someone to want to have sex with her.

AnalSexIsTheBest8-- · 2024-05-27T16:04:54+00:00

B.

I need a woman who can be my equal, challenge me to be the better version of myself and be reliable and effective lifepartner. I want a make, not a daughter.

DarayRaven · 2024-05-27T15:53:55+00:00

First define "young"

Because l'm not interested if she's under 25

Obviously B

PinchRunners · 2024-05-27T18:09:17+00:00

Option A because she is the most similar to me.

i am unexperienced as well and i would want someone im dating to experience their first kiss when I do as well and that logic can be extrapolated to all the other scenarios. In addition to that, it would be easier for me i suspect to navigate relationships for the first time with someone who is doing the same. Her being gullible and naive are red flags to me though: i dont have any wishes to take advantage of her, but I know other people will

ListPlenty6014 · 2024-05-27T20:19:12+00:00

The way you framed it, obviously B. But IRL there will also be kind and trusting women with high self esteem who haven’t left their hometown who would be much better partners than many of the “confident” “knowledgeable” but actually deeply insecure women who have compensated for their insecurities by traveling around the world getting dicked down by entire continents during their hoe phase.

Acrobatic_Computer · 2024-05-28T13:56:47+00:00

I'm a sucker for trying to turn A into B, even though logically B is the better partner.

DontBeFat1 · 2024-05-30T21:51:30+00:00

Option A.

Because the positive qualities you listed in B tend to come with secondary, negative qualities, like arrogance, combativeness, self-centredness, and disagreeableness.

With Option A, it is only problematic if the man she is getting with is going to abuse her, and since I know I'm not an abuser, I'd rather have a pleasant, agreeable, trusting, and peaceful woman.

abaxeron · 2024-05-27T18:56:10+00:00

A.

I'm too weak to carry two persons' baggage.

RecreationalPorpoise · 2024-05-27T15:27:43+00:00

B if she’ll actually be nice to me and put effort into our relationship. That means the traits like “confident” and “secure” can’t be code for “jk, she’s actually just a huge bitch.”

Creation_Soul · 2024-05-27T14:49:04+00:00

well, when I was young I was not interested in much older women and now would not be interested in the much younger ones.

So, at my age, definitely the mature one.

Environmental_Day558 · 2024-05-27T15:07:55+00:00

B. But I'm curious, why ask would a man rather pick a woman with a bunch of negative traits vs positive traits, if everything else is the exact same?

Background-Map-7243 · 2024-05-27T21:25:29+00:00

B I want a functional adult

FreitasAlan · 2024-05-28T01:19:34+00:00

I don’t think these options are realistic and my initial instinct was to say “neither”. But since I have to choose one of them I had a look at the adjectives and “trusting” is only adjective that I would say it’s not neutral to me. So A just because of that. You could change all the other adjectives as much as you want and I would still find them equivalent.

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Friedrich_Friedson · 2024-05-27T15:37:20+00:00

B by far. Although the first one has a certain fling charm tbf

AreOut · 2024-05-27T15:37:57+00:00

B of course

shadowrangerfs · 2024-05-27T15:45:53+00:00

Has the second woman also never left her hometown?

Ok-Dust-4156 · 2024-05-27T17:03:40+00:00

Option "B" no questions. Have no interest in dealing with a princess.

GrandpaDallas · 2024-05-27T17:07:18+00:00

I pick the mature woman easily.

I don’t want to date a himbo.

alebruto · 2024-05-27T17:32:22+00:00

Mr__Citizen · 2024-05-27T17:54:46+00:00

Probably B. A can definitely be attractive, but B seems more likely to get and keep my attention.

envious1998 · 2024-05-27T18:23:10+00:00

raldabos · 2024-05-27T21:12:48+00:00

Dating for fun (traveling a lot, live our sex lifes, spend every weekend having fun) A.

Dating to get married (everything from A plus things like planning things together, buy house, invest, etc...) B.

kongeriket · 2024-05-27T22:10:31+00:00

I married a mixture between Option A and B. She had just left her hometown and was knowledgeable. But was mostly option A. She was, and continues to be 15+ years later, very fun to be around.

Real life is a lot more complicated than ceteris paribus.

Ultramega39 · 2024-05-27T22:13:54+00:00

B, especially if she's a introvert.

Confidence and introversion are a very rare and sexy combo.

I feel bored around people who find books boring or hate learning new things and are closed minded.

Pegmaster6969696969 · 2024-05-27T22:35:35+00:00

I don't care as long as she has sex with me willingly

SsRapier · 2024-05-28T00:14:38+00:00

B, specially if shes older than me no matter the age

LaloTwinsDa2nd · 2024-05-29T07:41:05+00:00

B

I recently had this option and chose B specifically cause I’d feel like shit with A even though they’re both 21 and both quite cute.

PMmeareasontolive · 2024-05-27T17:05:17+00:00

I'd lean toward A, reason being women are attracted to masculinity. Woman A will have a more flexible idea of who fits that role than woman B who will be focused on the top % of guys.

Also, I don't find confidence attractive because the biggest jerks, and the most Dunning Kruger affected people I know are the most confident people I know. I totally don't get why people even like it. If someone doesn't have some self deprecating humor, at least sometime, I think they are boring, and possibly a psycho.

lol, I see option A is the most downvoted option

ComfortableJeans · 2024-05-27T15:27:11+00:00

Option B, please.

I'm 6'3, big, strong, deep voiced and good with my hands. But I'm also a massive shy soft boy pussy that just wants to be loved on by someone I love. My past realtionships have been with option B women and they've been the happiest ones.

It feels good when they want to tease you and be all in charge, but it's also really cute when you're really comfortable with them and get more forceful in your teasing and they get all stunlocked and don't know what to do.

It's also nice to be with a girl who wants to take care of you like that. In more of a hands on kind of way. Being held while you fall asleep is nice.

Having someone take care of me in a more agressive way also brings that out more in me.

It's also nice when a partner like that feels safe and secure enough around you that they become comfurtable being soft and vulnerable with you too.

They also give me nicknames I won't get into that made me feel good to be called, but would be embarrased to be called in front of other people.

This is all assuming that we're both matching on the other aspects too.

Then again, if I felt myself falling in love with Option A too, it also wouldn't be something I'd worry about. If we're clicking on so many levels, we're clicking. I'm just going off of past relationships.

Steakman1 · 2024-05-27T15:50:13+00:00

B. If woman A is gullible and naive, then she’s more vulnerable to manipulation. And I’m not always going to be around to protect her from being manipulated by others, nor would I want to be.

boom-wham-slam · 2024-05-27T15:52:51+00:00

Option B. But honestly it's not important either way. Option A would be acceptable as well if she meets my other requirements. The things addressed in the question are not very relevant to what I look for in a long term relationship.

DzejSiDi · 2024-05-27T18:13:26+00:00

For me those are like tastes, sweet or salty. Both are fine and a matter of preference.

But if I had to choose, I would pick A. Why? A man likes to impres and be admired, and it is way easier to make excited somebody inexperienced (and look cool in her eyes).

stats135 · 2024-05-27T16:03:17+00:00

OPTION A.

Reason 1: "Men always want to be a woman's first love and women like to be a man's last romance." - Oscar Wilde.

I want to be a woman's first. The first she has sex with, the first she falls in love with, the first she experiences life with. This happens when she is inexperienced woman who has never left her hometown. When I take a girl out I want to see her eyes sparkle from seeing something new, not the eyes of someone who's seen it all before.

Reason 2: Yin and Yang.

I want someone that is complimentary to me. I am confident and knowledgeable. Why would I want a woman that is confident and knowledgeable? At best she knows what I know. In which case we come to the same conclusions, and nothing of value is gained. At worse she comes to different conclusions than I do, and that just breeds conflict. I much rather she be unconfident and unknowledgeable, and simply trust and defer to me.

Hot_Lack_4868 · 2024-05-27T15:03:46+00:00

Option A easily

berichorbeburied · 2024-05-27T15:17:55+00:00

Whichever ones the most sexually attractive one.

If they’re the same sexual attractiveness.

Then the one who is open/willing to do or have the relationship I want.

If they both want or are willing to do that

Then the one who wants/desires me the most

If that’s the same.

Then it literally doesn’t matter to me which one.

Ima have to put the same amount of extra effort in.

Ima still have to put effort into making myself attractive in all categories.

And I’m still going have to put extra effort into prioritizing her wants/needs and interests and her personality and goals.

So atp it won’t matter which one it is.

YtBlue · 2024-05-27T15:14:31+00:00

A. B means experience and by definition that means a hoe. Nobody wants that

boom-wham-slam · 2024-05-27T15:11:26+00:00

I mean I don't think this is an actual choice that could possibly exist. If true just on the body count factor, either option A is a ho, or option B is a prude born again Christian or something. Right? Like if it's 1 then B is a prude, if it's 20, A is a ho. So I don't think this is as apples to apples a comparison as you think it is.

That being said, the primary focus of a serious long term relationship vs a casual one, is having children. Woman A has more fertility. None of the other factors are very relevant. You may as well have said she prefers beef tacos to pork tacos... like wtf does that have to do with me wanting to seriously date her? What does her knowledge about things matter? I mean ok it's good but not at the expense of fertility. Most of the things I look for that are important are not even addressed in your description and it also kind of misses the point on what men find attractive in age gaps.

Tokimonatakanimekat · 2024-05-27T16:13:22+00:00

I don't know.

It would be easier to deal with B, but I guess relationship with A would be more romantic.

And since there is no telling if one will be more loyal than the other, either option has similar worth to me.

Upset_Material_3372 · 2024-05-27T17:24:00+00:00

Whichever one was more interested in me and usually women like option B would be much more judgmental and think herself better than her equal man but if she didn’t I’d choose option B.

Quad-Banned120 · 2024-05-27T17:38:10+00:00

My wife started as A despite being far-travelled but has grown into B and I'm proud of her.
I present as relatively old school and tend to attract more of the A types who seek someone secure verses the B types who my personality tends to conflict with. I'm relatively old school, hate traveling, am successful in my career but also party and do drugs. Usually the B types have a specific type of man in mind and that ain't me.

KorinTowerFreeloader · 2024-05-27T19:01:05+00:00

Depends on how you interpret these things, so basically what would it look like in real life?

Option A could be bad, because perhaps her immaturity might showcase itself in the worst possible way, in the relationship itself. For example, having issues with the most irrational things that shouldn't constitute a problem. On the other hand, maybe it's great because a good relationship should mean growing together and building each other up to become the best versions both parties can be. Therefore, if someone is already so "established" like Option B, it's hard to have that sort of relationship since B is already shaped in a certain way as a person. It's like all the so-called independent women struggling to form relationships don't realize the problem is they are looking for a box to tick in their fully shaped lives, and not someone to build a new life with. On the other hand, B would be more mature and down to earth in a relationship, not being ridiculous, etc.

I am glad you mentioned the same N-count, though, because in 9/10 cases in real life, women describing themselves using adjectives like knowing what they want, mature, secure in themselves, or confident is just another way of saying post-CC carousel. Having said that, here it's that 1/10 exception, so let's stick with that. For that reason, I choose B because she must be smart enough to have the flexibility in her life to build something new together. I can see how Option A is more realistic in real-life, though, if you want someone with a low n-count (so for most men). Still, Option B is secure in herself, mature, smart, etc., so I assume she didn't participate in CC-carousel because she doesn't need empty validation and knows her self-worth, so that's what I want.

Alfred-Adler · 2024-05-28T11:18:27+00:00

A young mature confident woman?

So we can have intelligent conversations, besides "doing other things". Also confidence makes for better sex, and better everything.

McTitty3000 · 2024-05-27T18:34:32+00:00

A.

If she's never left her hometown, I can be like her Aladdin and show her the world all while riding her magic carpet ( although I prefer it shaved)

Barely-moral · 2024-05-27T16:05:20+00:00

Option A. Being mature and knowledgeable always comes with baggage.

Ludens0 · 2024-05-27T14:53:59+00:00

My top 1 priority is morals and how she would treat me. I'm surprised it is anywhere in the "They are both".

I wouldn't care much about A or B. My wife is B, but that was irrelevant in my decision of marrying her.

Dorkles_ · 2024-05-27T19:39:45+00:00

It really comes down to who the women picks not the men

Q4M: would you rather date a young naive, gullible woman or a young mature confident woman? Why?

Option A:

Option B:

Comments

Title	Q4M: would you rather date a young naive, gullible woman or a young mature confident woman? Why?
Author	Windmill_flowers
Upvotes	9
Comments	173
Date	May 27, 2024 2:44 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1d1t4z7/q4m_would_you_rather_date_a_young_naive_gullible/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4m-would-you-rather-date-a-young-naive-gullible.1519697 https://theredarchive.com/post/1519697