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brownskinnedflower
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (24 children) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]Summerisle7FDS STRATEGY COACH419 points420 points421 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
“Leaning on the wall” is the best detail. These guys can never be bothered to hang a picture.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago* (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]StrainingMyNeuronsFDS Newbie85 points86 points87 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
That makes me terribly sad for you 😞 Lots of love to you. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
[+][deleted] 5 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]StrainingMyNeuronsFDS Newbie39 points40 points41 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It gets better. I gathered from your posts that you’re still very young (younger than me anyway). Trust me, it does get better.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This. Just a few years ago I thought I would NEVER be healthy enough to be in a relationship.
Therapy, Why Does He Do That?, strong older female role models. This was my trifecta.
[–]StrainingMyNeuronsFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
When/if you physically move away from him, your recovery will start picking up speed. This will also be a very vulnerable time for you (even if you feel great and empowered), and you’ll have to use all the resources you’ve got (FDS, a survivor’s support group, friends and family you trust) to establish yourself without falling prey to sociopaths and abusers, who look and target vulnerable women.
Once you complete that stage, all those memories that bother you will sink into deep past.
[–]annamae602FDS Newbie32 points33 points34 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Ding Ding Ding. My father, among other disgusting behaviors, exposed himself to me as a child on multiple occasions. Yet he doesn't understand why I've been so "cruel" to him by cutting him out of my life. I swear to god some men just want children as props so they can use them to stroke their egos about being a "great father" and are surprised when those children grow up to be real human beings.
[–]laserkatzeFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
damn that’s sexual abuse of a child. i‘m so sorry. have you cut contact with him!?
[–]PizzaPigeonFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Hey, I'm not sure how old you are. I'm mid 20s and I have PTSD, most likely CPTSD due to a bad childhood, sexual assault and an abusive relationship. It does get better, sometimes its taking a few steps back to go forward and sometimes there's no progress for a while. Be gentle with yourself, none of this was your fault. Do not write your entire life off because its been bad so far, I promise things can change for you.
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 131 points132 points133 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Damn, that’s awful. Hopefully, you ran like Forrest Gump after that revelation.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]modernmedusaaRuthless Strategist115 points116 points117 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
should we just start slamming a lie detector machine down on the table on dates or? ;)
[–]coolerthanyouravgmomFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I made them show me their licenses on the first date. Of course they could cover up the address portion, but I wanted to see their picture matching a date of birth. The ones that laughed or smirked at my sense of safety didn't get second dates.
[–]lifeyjaneFDS Newbie92 points93 points94 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
”well how old did you think I was?!”
“I don’t know. Maybe the age you TOLD ME??” ¯_(ツ)_/¯
Scumbag. ”You’re the stupid one. It’s your fault you don’t catch my stupid lies.”
[–]aloof_oneFDS Newbie36 points37 points38 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly how they think!!
[–]suspended_animation_FDS Newbie20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How vile. I'm sorry he manipulated you
[–]salty_redheadFDS Newbie40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
A friend of mine slept with a guy who told her that he had two children and a vasectomy. Turns out he had three kids with two different women and had a future appointment for a vasectomy.
She dated him for 7 years and he was, unsurprisingly, a complete piece of shit for the duration.
[–]smitty4728FDS Newbie[🍰] 14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Ah and OF COURSE he trotted out the "crazy bitch ex-wife" trope. It's NEVER his fault. Same ex-wife probably just realized she was married to a selfish man and stopped taking it in silence.
[–]ewoksareprettycoolFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is so specific that I’m wondering if we have the same ex or if this is so utterly common, you can’t even tell
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 312 points313 points314 points 5 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
This is my first post on here so sorry if the format is weird. Anyways, this guy was my Uber driver, thought he was cool so I gave him a chance. I went on one date with him a few weeks ago and he overshared that he had a daughter and even showed me a picture of her. Mind you, he never shared this information prior to the date. I simply took a mental note of that fact. After the date, the following couple of days, he’d always text me around 10 pm asking to “hang out” but I already knew what that meant and I always came up with excuses. By that point, I honestly didn’t care about him and already placed him in the “dusty” folder. I deleted our conversation thread and kept it pushing. To my surprise, he messaged me on WhatsApp today. I was very honest about my “no baby daddies allowed” boundary and this was the response I received. I was appalled. If he was able to lie about his daughter, what else can he lie about? Be careful out here, ladies. We need to thoroughly vet any man that wants to be apart of our lives. Have standards and uphold them. I hope that I have helped someone today...
[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist128 points129 points130 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
In the future I would say just block the guy if he tries to get you to "hang out" at night. And furthermore, I wouldn't even answer a text message from a man after 8 or 9 pm. It's usually sex.
[–]BerryCocoLoveFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You can actually report drivers in the Uber app if one ever makes you feel uncomfortable. I believe it’s actually against policy for drivers to hit on passengers. Good for you for spotting the red flags!
[–]Parking-ActFDS Disciple6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
One time an uber driver hit on me and a few weeks later I saw him on transit with two little girls (his kids) and get this..A WIFE! They were on their way to church!
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[removed]
[–]ceilingkatwatchesusFDS Disciple12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ummmmm..... You... I mean... Ya know what nevermind. 🤦🏿♀️
[–]ErikaNaumannFDS Newbie65 points66 points67 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Errr... What? You think only black men can be absent fathers? 😐
[–]TheSatanicVeganFDS Newbie867 points868 points869 points 5 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
Yes. I had her (a child) but that (she) doesn't matter.
Wow. What a deadbeat.
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 342 points343 points344 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
You’re right. And his daughter is across the world in Europe with her mom. I’m in Canada (for more context).
[–]verityspiceFDS Newbie162 points163 points164 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Leaving your kids in a different country is always my biggest red flag. You would have to rip my daughter from my cold dead hands before I let us be apart.
If he can leave his kids he can leave you and any kids you have.
[–]TheSatanicVeganFDS Newbie219 points220 points221 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Right.
I remember I knew a guy/had a friend who had a daughter. She was a beautiful and smart girl. She was 2 when I met her. I met the baby momma too. I can't remember why. All I know is that she got mad because she thought we were together. Maybe he brought me along to make her jealous and it went over my head. Anyway, this man stated he wanted to be there for his daughter but when the momma wanted to move to Maryland from the Atlanta area- he was just like "that's fine. I'm not ready to be a dad because I want to finish living out my life while I can still do drugs and shit."
Talk about LVM.
Then later when he found out I got out of a 5 year relationship and went on a short sleeping spree, he was upset I "didn't take out my pain on him." Then proceeded to give my his PornHub account info so I can have my own folder so we could "share our interests." (Which probably would have offended him. Tbh. LMAO).
I haven't talked to him since.
[–]CassieGreen85FDS Apprentice137 points138 points139 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
OMFG what a LVM!
I would've taken his account and fill it with male gay porn
[–]TheSatanicVeganFDS Newbie76 points77 points78 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I know
I thought of doing that along with male solo masturbation videos but I didn't even bother.
[–]CassieGreen85FDS Apprentice38 points39 points40 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
OMG those exist??? How sad is this, holy crap I can't even XD
Nah of course, this is all hypothetical, best thing to do is ignore, block, delete!
You had the right kind of queen energy, sis!
[–]PasdepromessesFDS Disciple15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What a tool. Also, love the username.
[–]gcthrowaway2019FDS Apprentice186 points187 points188 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
This deserves an award bc you blocked him. No trying to get in the last word with a comeback, just a nice solid BLOCK. We need to see more of this here!
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 117 points118 points119 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Thanks!! I always let them have the last word before blocking. Makes them more mad. That’s a tip for you ladies! 😜
[–]--wellDAM--FDS Apprentice71 points72 points73 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I wish women would shut the f up more! Like, these are men! They never shut the fuck up let them have the trophy!
Ghost. Block. Delete. No paragraphs.
[–]ceilingkatwatchesusFDS Disciple17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Omg I did this yesterday ahahahhaha.. I had an ex randomly text me on FB messenger, 2 weeks ago. Ya know how someone texts a stupid statement/comment and then they keep talking to justify what they said and then they sound more stupid..... yea I didn't even respond. There was just no point at that point.
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
yeah, too many folks on here post conversations where they keep digging themselves into a hole with trying to bite back at these idiot men. best revenge is blocking, no explanation.
[–]GAaliyah12FDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yesss I hate when some women carry on the convo trying to "argue" with the guy.
[–]modernmedusaaRuthless Strategist162 points163 points164 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
And just like that..Pinocchio's nose grew 6inches.
Its literally like watching a child with chocolate round their mouth say 'it wadnnnt me'
Sis, all I can say is...I feel ya *virtual hug*
These men aren't even trying to make their BS make sense anymore...they really are taking us for an IDIOT that was born yeserday. Their brains are too pornfried to come up with adequate lies *zzz zzz- just deny it*
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 55 points56 points57 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It was “pornfried” for me! LOL🤣🤣🤣🤣
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girl.... Make it make sense 😭
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 86 points87 points88 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Yeah it’s just trifling how my honesty was met with BS. They scream that women are never straightforward in dating and never know what they want. Once you’re honest, you’re met with lies. Make it make sense. 🙄
[–]lifeyjaneFDS Newbie51 points52 points53 points 5 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
I have experience with this “Women aren’t straightforward”-then-punishing-you-for-being straightforward business:
Any time in my single days when my profile said or I answered “What are you looking for in a guy” with the fact that I was really looking for a praying, church-going man, it was met with rage, incredulity, and name-calling.
”What?! So you won’t even give a non-religious guy a chance?!! You’re saying I’m a bad person. C’mon. I’m a good guy.”
No, thank you.
”You’re so judgey and picky! Good luck getting anyone with that attitude.... C’mon. I think you’re really cute.”
Dude, no! We are all allowed to look for people who share our interests or meet any criteria we have. You don’t get to neg me into being in a relationship with everyone who decides they want one!
[–]Hipster-AuroraFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Also, for Christians and MOST religions, it's strongly advised to date people of your own faith, which makes sense for compatibility reasons too. But these guys are so entitled they think they matter more than your faith and you should place them above it. It's audacious.
[–]4E4MEFDS Apprentice6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"They scream that women are never straightforward in dating and never know what they want. "
Projection. Only a liar thinks everyone else is a liar.
[–]plummyjellyfishFDS Newbie101 points102 points103 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I hate deadbeat dads, so many men are borderline deadbeats without even realising it, too. They think because they give their kid a phone call once a fortnight and occasionally buy a video game or something that they're a parent. Give me a break! Good on you for blocking this scumbag
[+][deleted] 5 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]bonzi5650FDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh god we have the same "father" unfortunately. Mine has the gall to blame my mother for why I have no interest being around him and want my kids even farther away from him. Disgraceful.
[–]DatonecatladyuknoFDS Apprentice0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Jfc. I am so sorry
[+][deleted] 5 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]DatonecatladyuknoFDS Apprentice5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Your MOM did nothing and said she thought YOU wouldn’t notice...? JFC! They both sound sick in the head. I hope your talking to someone because that’s a lot to unbox and work through
[–]bubblegumthot6990 points91 points92 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
"I had a child but I abandoned them so it doesn't really count"
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This would seem to be their literal thought process.
[–]monkibare75 points76 points77 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I was once traumatized by waking up alone to the guy making breakfast...FOR THE KID STARING AT ME FROM THE DOORWAY. When I could finally get myself together enough to leave he just said, “he’s not usually here...” and then admitted it was his parents’ house, too. Never said a word about either for like three dates beforehand. I RAN.
[–]ErikaNaumannFDS Newbie52 points53 points54 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Wow! This is... Horrifying. The kids were staring at you in bed? WTF he couldn't even close the door??
This is one of the reasons why we don't have sex for a few months. It's much harder to hide having children/wives/girlfriends for that long.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]EasymodelifeFDS Newbie60 points61 points62 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm childfree by choice but I've always had a visceral disgust for deadbeat dads. If they'll abandon their child, they'll abandon you in a heartbeat.
Not to mention that he's happy to start the relationship with a huge lie, which obviously would have come out eventually. Either of these things would be a dealbreaker for me, let alone both.
[–]randomgirl34861FDS Newbie50 points51 points52 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So he’s telling you because he’s just a father and not a dad, you should be ok with him having a child. GROSS.
[–]lickyblickyuhhFDS Newbie46 points47 points48 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It doesn’t matter that he.......HAS A WHOLE CHILD?
[–]heythere360FDS Apprentice81 points82 points83 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It’s really scary tbh.
And he’s an Uber driver? Really makes you wonder if you’re the first girl....
I wonder how many girls he hits on and takes out who are captive in his Uber over the span of an entire day. Uber drivers can be fucking creeps.
Thanks for sharing your story.
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 69 points70 points71 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Exactly. Girl I learned my lesson!!! I no longer engage in conversation with Uber drivers. Shut the F up and get me to my destination.
[–]sugaredberryFDS Newbie27 points28 points29 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Please report him to Uber that’s scary as hell
[–]desertedstreetsFDS Newbie37 points38 points39 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I once matched with a guy who was a bus driver. He proudly repeated several times during the time we talked that he picks up women on his bus and has had the most success that way. Of course this guy hit on other females in his car before OP. I simply don't engage in conversation with Uber drivers.
[–]wawa310FDS Newbie72 points73 points74 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
So weird! I matched w a dude on an app who wanted to text all day long, but would only talk about super shallow topics. Red flag.
I started asking him questions about his life that I felt were “impolite” but also... c’mon, let’s get to actually know each other. Turns out he was avoiding talking about his ex wife and 3 children who also live in Europe (we are in the US).
And to get that info I had to pry SO HARD. Didn’t tell me he had kids, went out of his way to avoid telling me how many kids, and then only after I asked about parenting during a pandemic and handling the quarantine between households did he tell me actually they’re in Europe.
Men are garbage.
[–]glittersparkles212FDS Newbie28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
LVM like this exists
Society : “ wHy yOu hAvE dAdDy iSsUeS “
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Society gaslights women into habitually accepting much, much less than we deserve. My hope is that with more and more women joining the community, this dysfunctional and exploitative pattern will end with us.
[–]HealthierOverseasFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
I saw a comment here or on some other like-minded sub that pointed out the whole concept of “daddy issues” shames women for having shitbag dads (or lack thereof).
Broke my brain a bit. Then I got mad. It’s always somehow our faults, isn’t it.
Edit: Found the post!
[–]booboodoughnutFDS Newbie24 points25 points26 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Out of sight out of mind, the shit we women have to put up with I swear! These scrotes deny the existence of their own flesh and blood imagine how they’d treat an unrelated woman!!!!
[–]CandyyWarholFDS Newbie28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My ex lied and tried to cover up having a child for months. Turns out he had a domestic abuse case open and that’s why she left and got the kid.
[–]shrimpcakewithcrustFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What bothers me is how he said his actual child doesn't matter. Imagine.
[–]dntbfllikeididPickmeisha™️68 points69 points70 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
“I had her”
WTF is that supposed to mean? Once you get someone else pregnant you HAVE a child, wether she lives with you or not. I fucking hate liars. Even worse if they are breeders too! 🤮
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 37 points38 points39 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Me too. How can you deny your own seed? So disgusting.
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The ultimate LVM move
[–]BovvsetteFDS Disciple21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
”Had her, but that doesn't matter” - nice to know how he would treat you and your possible kids in the future. How he treats his past relationships and even families is very revealing, it gives you a good image of what's eventually waiting for you.
So nonchalant about abandoning kids just makes you want to have sex and risk having them with him! Creating a family with him would make you and the kids so happy and taken care of, zero issues, much support! Dad of the year! /s
[–]UnitedHoneyFDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
Love how men are so hard on single mothers but they literally lie about having kids. Smh
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
I feel like men and women with children should date one another🤷🏾♀️
[–]mostdefinitelyntursFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
But remember a LOT of guys use their kids to get relationships because that's their method of getting sex. It's a very perverted way to get sex because they have poor social skills and they lack integrity. Their approach is very Ted Bundy-esque "Oh help me because no one won't date me because I have 3 kids" and they usually introduce their children very early on to suck you in. My ex did that early on and I should have known that was a Soviet's Union worth of red flags right then and there...
[–]CoyoteaPartyFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I have three kids but don’t want more. If I date a man with children chances are I’ll end up raising his for him. No thank you.
[–]LoveGamblingFDS Newbie-1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Exactly, and men without children are not going to want to date you for the same exact reason.
[–]CoyoteaPartyFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So I’ll never date? Lol
[–]SeleneNyxFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Not true. I raised my son alone and I was never lacking male attention. I made it clear upfront in my relationships they wouldn't be meeting my son or becoming a daddy.
[–]LoveGamblingFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well I'll take your word for it, I don't have kids so I wouldn't know. I got to this conclusion from all the men I meet that don't stop bitching about single moms.
[–]understatedalwaysFDS Disciple3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Don’t make us date men with children. I’m a single mom who makes a great living, beautiful, and has a live in nanny to help. I refuse to date single dads for the same reason you dislike them. In the majority of cases, their wife/baby mama left them for a legitimate reason. Or, they left the mother of their child out of selfishness. Also, they fail at multitasking and ask to only see you every other weekend when they don’t have kids, no thanks.
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
My thing is why would you expect a CHILDLESS man to carry on your baggage? I don’t think it’s fair...
[–]ThrowingItIntoTheSeaFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Children are not “baggage”. They are human beings. And they didn’t ask to be the leftovers of a broken home. Check yourself.
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Sorry if I didn’t use the correct term. However, my question still remains. Why would a woman with kids refuse to date a man with kids yet expect a childless man to date her? Make it make sense.
[–]UnitedHoneyFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I see what you mean. If I had kids, I won’t barred men who have kids.
Kids aren’t baggage to the PARENTS but they are baggage to a single woman without kids. They know this therefore they lie about having kids.
[–]caramealsFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What an embarrassment. Sorry you had to waste your time with this MF..
[–]GraveyardH2020FDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My ex lied to me about having another child on the way when we first got together. I had no idea. Claims he didn’t tell me because “he was too afraid to lose me” and “one more kid doesn’t matter and shouldn’t make a difference.” (This was his third) like yea man, a whole other human being that’s going to be in this world for the rest of your life, MATTERS.
[–]PunnyPrinterPickmeisha™️12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Such a relief to see a quick BLOCK. 😍
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My absolute favourite button! 😜
[–]dzgataFDS Disciple70 points71 points72 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Not to attack you but next time don’t tell dudes like this that’s your reason. Now he’s going to lie about having a child to the next woman :( that’s not your fault ofc. He shouldn’t lie, but I also tend to avoid direct reasons with guys bc I know how they work. Instead of finding a woman who likes X about them, they deceive unsuspecting women.
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 51 points52 points53 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Thanks for the tip! I thrive on “honesty is the best policy” but you’re absolutely right. I only polished his game by being honest. Weird, huh?
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks!! Sounds like an excellent approach. And I don’t feel attacked, I’m loving the dialogue under my post!!😃
[–]Elegant-StopFDS Newbie57 points58 points59 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Honesty is not the best policy with men. Men lie all the time and don’t consider it lying if it is somewhat true “I don’t have a child (that I take care of)”.
The women I know, myself included, are much more averse to any type of lying and it makes them too vulnerable and easy to control in relationships.
You don’t need to lie, but always always keep your cards to yourself
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The "how come women aren't honest" B.S. from men is a ploy to get us to reveal more than we should.
[–]PinqPrincessFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is great advice 👍
[–]herp_derp_hagFDS Newbie22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wowwwwww, not just a liar, but a shitty Dad as well!
[–]suspended_animation_FDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
They hope that we are stupid with bad memory
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Exactly! My memory is like an elephant’s...I don’t forget shit!
[–]suspended_animation_FDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Same, to my ex's dismay
[–]sadcelloFDS Apprentice43 points44 points45 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Deadbeat fathers who hate their children and pretend they never exist are everywhere and men want me to have sympathy for men being destroyed at divorce court. They deserve it and it's not enough anyway, men always came out richer after divorce, women always end up poorer. What sympathy men deserve? What empathy men deserve? Fucking males.
[–]Phoenix__Rising2018Ruthless Strategist7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What a prick!
[–]TheWarmestHugzFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Disgusting. Imagine thinking that low of your own flesh and blood. This loser needs to step up.
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
But that would mean taking responsibility for his actions so far and maybe even correcting the course of his life as it exists today... Pretty hard to get to that point when you're a deadbeat NVM and your delusional ass believes you've done nothing wrong
[–]lilbobabean_queenFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Wow how is he gonna lie in the same receipt👀👀
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That’s how dumb some men are🙄
[–]frodosdojoFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My ex-husband told me had no kids. I found out when we filed taxes together that he owed child support for a child.
I was pulled over by cops in my ex's car one day. They asked me if I knew EX. The officer told me there was a warrant for him for child support in another state. He was able to petition the court for a DNA test (the child was 15) because he swore to the court the mom was a ho. Test came back 99.9% his. That was the day I realized what a f-ing liar he was. It took me another year to get away from him but I am grateful every day he is gone.
[–]OrchidLionFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What a gaslighting piece of shit
[–]VillanellohFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
A man messaged me on OLD and I said I don't date anyone with kids. His reply was 'Oh don't worry you'll never see her' = 'because I don't bother'
[–]LaTaina87FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh wow, he makes me want to vomit
[–]Summerisle7FDS STRATEGY COACH18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It’s possible that he wasn’t saying his child doesn’t matter, he was just saying it shouldn’t matter to you if he has a child or if he lies about it. Which is just as bad imo! It’s not for him to say what should matter to you! And lying is always a red flag!
[–]brownskinnedflowerFDS Newbie[S] 45 points46 points47 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It matters to me. It is my boundary. I don’t care how sweet, kind, and compassionate the man is. I have been through the baby mama drama rodeo before and it is mentally draining. After a horrible experience dealing with a man with children, I vowed to myself to never deal with that drama again. No exceptions.
[–]Summerisle7FDS STRATEGY COACH12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Totally understand and that is a very wise boundary!
[–]LevelupmamaFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So they really ain’t shit, huh?
[–]Orphanedpinkpetals1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sick
[–]throwawayneverminditFDS Disciple1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lmao, I'd probably find the ex on FB and send her this to use in any potential custody or child support case.
[–]rating-throwaway88FDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wow. Poor child, having that human being as a biological dad must suck.
[–]RoseDumplingThrowaway Account1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How dare he. Just yuck
[–]dick_fingersatm0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I had a guy I met off Tinder that I went on a few "dates" with (I wouldn't even call them dates tbh, I even paid) but after hanging out as friends for MONTHS he finally mentioned he had a daughter. He tried to KISS ME at the beginning without telling me such an important detail. I love children. I would love to date a guy with kids. But straight up hiding important things like that from potential love interests is not okay. I'm so thankful (for multiple reasons) that I didn't let him touch me.
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
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