Would you disqualify a girl for dating if she was a sex worker?

mleko69 · 2019-03-01T13:59:02+00:00

How is that even a question? lol

AellaGirl · 2019-03-01T14:48:01+00:00

too much context needed, but in general any woman whose only option for independence is selling sexuality is a no because I'd feel like she looking for a provider as a way out.

I'd also worry about her notions of sex/intimacy. Seeing sex as transactional poisons interactions between men and women imo.

Cam shows can be anything from non nude to full out porn. Trust would be a potential issue.

The line between a hobosexual and a prostitute is blurry which doesn't help, meaning the spectrum of problematic behavior is much wider than obvious.

Eastuss · 2019-03-01T13:39:08+00:00

Everyone would answer you yes. But are sex workers having issue finding partners? Hell no.

-TheGreasyPole- · 2019-03-01T13:38:16+00:00

I suspect answers from guys here will bifurcate depending on what you mean by “dating”.

I think men would find sex workers potentially enticing for ONS or other very short-term mating scenarios. If they take “date” as meaning this, a chance to get laid/NSA sex, they’ll probably be cautiously in favour. Why not? Sounds like fun with a hot and sexually adventurous girl.

I also think men would find sex workers highly repulsive for marriage or any other even modestly long-term mating scenarios. If they take “date” as meaning this, the start of an LTR deal, they’ll probably be massively opposed, even disgusted by the idea.

Men will happily fuck strippers. They generally don’t want to marry one.

headchefboyardee · 2019-03-01T15:56:27+00:00

I wouldn't date a girl with a premium snapchat.

passepar2t · 2019-03-01T13:29:38+00:00

Is there anyone who wouldn't disqualify a girl for that?

abaxeron · 2019-03-01T13:42:42+00:00

would that alone disqualify her from getting into a relationship

No, but that would be a serious "-100 points".

IHeartDay9 · 2019-03-01T15:25:38+00:00

I've done it. Literally didn't care. I'd rather date an escort than a Monsanto lawyer or something.

crackrocksteady7 · 2019-03-01T13:36:27+00:00

MGTOWtoday · 2019-03-01T14:10:49+00:00

reluctantly_red · 2019-03-01T17:27:33+00:00

If you exclude phone sex and web cam girls you're going to be excluding a lot of women. If you add sugar babies to the list the excluded class gets even bigger. I friend of mine was a phone sex girl back in college. She's now a senior executive at a major corporation (where she assists in the fucking of far more people than she ever did as a sex worker).

NalkaNalka · 2019-03-01T13:34:11+00:00

For marriage, certainly. For anything else, who cares.

_Neon_Shadow_ · 2019-03-01T17:24:38+00:00

I have standards and self respect. So yes, that would disqualify her.

colbyfan · 2019-03-01T16:58:42+00:00

Sex workers have skewed experiences with intimacy. It is very hard to get past that. Source: am a sexworker and have alot of friends who are sexworkers.

Here4thebeer3232 · 2019-03-01T17:14:20+00:00

I'm dating a girl now who is currently a sex worker. I'm cool with it, I dont have to pay to be with her and I'm not trying to wife her.

But to be fair, I wouldnt consider myself the average type of man around these parts. Half the stuff that bothers men here doesnt even phase me.

Aries310 · 2019-03-01T20:17:25+00:00

Frankly, I prefer women with that experience. They know exactly how the world works. No PC, no "everyone is beautiful", no chivalry, none of that stuff.

Sex work is cut and dry. Money for services. Pure and simple. And real life can be that way also.

gunbusterxl · 2019-03-01T14:10:42+00:00

I hate to say it, but probably.

It would bother me to no end, and would probably poison the relationship. I'm cool with her having close male friends, but actively flirting with with other guys is too much for me. The Twitch thing... I don't know. As long as she's not flirting with a specific person, I'd be OK with it.

[deleted] · 2019-03-01T16:22:48+00:00

Lmao absolutely yes. Jesus have some standards

jonathino001 · 2019-03-01T21:06:53+00:00

I think you might want to clarify your question. Are you asking "was" as in past tense?

donkeydodo · 2019-03-01T21:09:03+00:00

I hooked up with a cam girl, had some nice sex; wouldn’t date though, too many red flags

Archibald_Andino · 2019-03-02T11:29:35+00:00

You set this question up very broadly. There's a huge difference in my mind between masturbating on a cam show and being a porn star (fucked by other guys) or prostitute. I don't really care about camgirling. I wouldn't however date a woman seriously if she was an escort. I'd be FWB's or something though easily. I have done in the past. Then I can also brag that I get to fuck an escort for free. Which I have.

SerpentCypher · 2019-03-01T13:38:41+00:00

Absolutely, I'm pretty sure those who wouldn't are outliers.

SpecialSpnk · 2019-03-01T13:36:36+00:00

Hell yes I would. I am not a cuck.

AutoModerator · 2019-03-01T13:28:17+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Christian_Kong · 2019-03-01T17:14:37+00:00

Anyone fucking around with anyone else is an natural no. Cam girls or whatever are fine. This probably goes for a large % of men.

Clit-cheese · 2019-03-01T17:48:09+00:00

I was an escort and webcammer and was never short of admirers and had guys literally fight over me on three different occasions. My kids dad is good looking but masculine, loyal and family orientated. He's a bit of a strong silent type so yeah never did kr any harm.

[deleted] · 2019-03-01T17:54:25+00:00

Yes. Such women are not relationship material

eaazzy_13 · 2019-03-01T21:15:40+00:00

I have cohabited with and been in an LTR with a locally famous stripper in a very large metropolitan area for several years now.

It can be extremely rewarding if handled right, and it can be extremely frustrating if handled wrong. Out of the dozens of strippers I have spent non-negligible time around in the past years, the one I am currently with is the only one I would ever consider for an LTR. The vast majority of strippers are grimy ass bitches, with horribly skewed views on sex and intimacy. But, that being said, the woman i am with has been the best significant other I’ve ever had, in just about every category.

She’s the most pretty, the most trustworthy, the most eager to please, the smartest, etc. woman I’ve come to know. I am aware this is an extreme outlier, but if I automatically disqualified her from my dating pool due to her job, i wouldn’t be nearly as fulfilled as I am now. So I don’t think sweeping generalizations can count for much without context.

If anyone has any questions, feel free to ask me.

Whiteliesmatter1 · 2019-03-01T21:40:43+00:00

I generally prefer my partner’s to not be sexual with other people besides me.

officerkondo · 2019-03-01T15:18:15+00:00

Well, looks like this one is for me. My on/off (mostly on) girlfriend of three years is going to start camming in the next week or so. I am supportive of it. As another commenter said, I don't care so long as I get her best.

blackedoutfast · 2019-03-01T20:18:05+00:00

i might fuck her but that's an absolute disqualifier for any kind of serious relationship

Barely-moral · 2019-03-01T13:53:30+00:00

As long as I am getting her best, I don't care. If she decides that I don't get to enjoy the same benefits that her clients enjoyed I am out.

petrichordium · 2019-03-01T14:18:24+00:00

Absolutely wouldn’t disqualify her at all. On the contrary. But i have no interest in convincing anyone bc the negative attitude toward some smart, very attractive, and interesting women has been super good to me.

Thatbiengsaid · 2019-03-01T15:03:10+00:00

I tell alot of guys this and it seems to get through to them. The only difference between your wife/girlfriend and a pornstar/webcam worker is ones sexual activity has been recorded and documented.

[deleted] · 2019-03-01T14:10:51+00:00

Depends on what she was doing. If she was selling used bras, panties, etc. I don't see a major problem with it. Photo shoots may be a grey area. Depends on what she was doing and under what circumstances.

If she was doing camming or involved in any sort of porn whether she was a model or not, it would be an immediate no.

CamoWoobie100 · 2019-03-01T14:41:48+00:00

It depends. If she offered any real life physical stuff, that would be a no.

If it was just online/over the phone, It would be difficult to get over, but if she was hot enough I'd get over it.

toysjoe · 2019-03-01T15:07:53+00:00

100% yes

exit_sandman · 2019-03-01T15:20:26+00:00

Yes I would, it's an odd question though.

motherofstars · 2019-03-01T15:38:49+00:00

Interesting question. Would it disqualify a man for LTR/serious dating, if he was a sex worker stripper or pornstar? Magic Mike is a fantasy 😄

gilliandrew · 2019-03-01T15:40:06+00:00

i once had a friend who did cam work while married to her husband. she did it to help pay rent with his knowledge and consent.

i say i once had because we are no longer friends for entirely separate reasons so i have no idea if she still cams.

CosmicBioHazard · 2019-03-01T15:45:30+00:00

She’d be disqualified, yes, though if I’m honest there are quite a few types of women over whom I would consider a sex worker the better option, in a limited-option scenario.

poopidydoopscoop · 2019-03-01T16:01:06+00:00

Twitch thing I can deal with. Cam girl hell naw. Prostitute and you're dead to me

YourPervertedDaddy · 2019-03-01T16:46:05+00:00

Having sex with other men = Disqualified. Weather HJ, BJ, or what ever.

Talk, Strip, Cam Show, Lesbian Porn = Not a problem for me.

[deleted] · 2019-03-01T16:48:39+00:00

Yeah.

RoyalAugur92 · 2019-03-01T17:05:27+00:00

If she were retired, I might be open to the possibility.

Anonshockdandroastd · 2019-03-01T17:44:43+00:00

Was? No. Is? Yes.

diffdedbed · 2019-03-01T18:53:39+00:00

From my personal development it depends.

18-29, I'd have been against it.

30-now, no problem.

18-29 were insecurity years for me.

Original_Username7 · 2019-03-01T19:12:46+00:00

You're kidding, right?

CoolHandLukeSkywalka · 2019-03-01T19:55:02+00:00

I dated a cam girl once. It was fun. I'd do it again. Not a deal breaker for me.

Man_bunny · 2019-03-01T20:10:51+00:00

Hmm, I talk/ joke about being a cam girl to pay off my boyfriend's student loans sometimes. He seems to not mind, he said if he was a girl he'd probably do it himself lol. The only thing stopping me is I can't figure out how to make my face unrecognizable. I have a lot of telling features to reference sadly. He wouldn't be ok with me doing porn, not that I would either. I don't know about stripping though.

[deleted] · 2019-03-01T20:31:19+00:00

Used to? Lets split the pay and get back on there together.

cxj · 2019-03-01T20:50:17+00:00

Yes

HumanSockPuppet · 2019-03-01T20:51:46+00:00

Fuck buddy or FWB, no.

Long-term relationship, yes.

iLLprincipLeS · 2019-03-01T21:37:50+00:00

you mean prostitute?

LonesomeSidLeon · 2019-03-01T22:15:08+00:00

It all depends on the person... I have nothing against anyone being in relationships with women or men who leverage their sexuality for financial gains, but I strictly avoid abusive dark triad types, especially if their personality disorders are left untreated.

Its people like that who ruin it for everyone else because the process of their illness tends to victimize everyone around them while they are busy claiming that someone's unwillingness to put up with abuse from them, is victimizing them.

Its a total mindfuck.

So, no untreated Dark Triads, and no people with a strong victim complex, is where I draw the line.

TuffGuy93 · 2019-03-02T00:14:39+00:00

Absolutely, whores are the most likely to cheat and therefore lack empathy. I don't want to date a sociopath.

[deleted] · 2019-03-02T00:24:41+00:00

Absolutely, these sorts of people are in no position to be teaching morals to my children and quite frankly shouldn't reproduce. It's quite frankly disgusting that there are people who wouldn't disqualify such women.

Anthony1881 · 2019-03-02T00:34:42+00:00

Yes!

ifeelfuckingterrible · 2019-03-02T01:48:36+00:00

No, as long as no actual sex was involved and she bought me shit with the mad bank she be making.

leftwingsoysquad · 2019-03-02T01:55:06+00:00

Your definition of "sex worker" is too broad. If she was an escort or took dick, then she is a "sex worker". If she got paid for sitting on her ass and looking pretty, she is just a non-reddit woman.

thrownaway2thewind · 2019-03-02T02:28:46+00:00

Honestly it's just less covert hedonism that typical girls fall into anyways. How would a cam girl differ from the average girl showing her booty on instagram differ? Both are probably sluts. Most girls go through some slut phase in their life, difference is one is making money on it.

If this bothers you at least 80% of girls should be off the radar. Ladies aren't pure in 2019

[deleted] · 2019-03-02T03:15:23+00:00

Problem with dating that woman is that someone's going to recognise her and try to fuck her. This is going to cause strain on the relationship.

It's a little different to if she's just pretty and a guy hits on her. If she's showing sexual availability, which is what sex workers do, men who know her work are going to chance their luck. Some may even offer to pay. And knowing that she is willing to do sex-related stuff for money is not going to make me sleep well at all.

That's assuming she isn't a sex worker because of massive debt, drug or alcohol addiction, emotional issues, low education or poverty - all red flags.

Friend of mine dated a stripper once. Was the craziest relationship he ever had. He met her, found out what she did, ignored the red flags and went for it. He had great sex, she was attractive and he supported her at first. Then came the infidelity, alcohol, drugs, lies, emotional rollercoasters. Sex work tends to attract broken people.

[deleted] · 2019-03-02T03:15:46+00:00

I'm a bisexual woman and no, I wouldn't. That's their clients who I find repulsive.

jasonology09 · 2019-03-02T04:37:23+00:00

Depends on the type of sex work. I've known and dated many women who are/were dancers at gentleman's clubs. For the most part they're no different than dating girls who work conventional jobs. They just work different hours and have some interesting/crazy stories. As for lying, some of them were fine with other people knowing, some kept it on the dl, and understandably so.

As for more involved types, like escorts, etc., I think I know myself well enough to know that, as understanding as I'd try to be about it being a job, I know I couldn't help but get jealous. That being said however,, I think I'd still prefer dating an escort to trying to be in an an "open" relationship.

[deleted] · 2019-03-02T05:52:58+00:00

No, not for being a sex worker by itself. Only if she was a heavy drug user, but I wouldn't be compatible with any woman who was a heavy drug user regardless of what else she does.

Sex workers probably have similar sex lives to most women anyway. So even if I was sexually jealous or something it wouldn't be a reason to reject the sex worker.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2019-03-02T06:43:54+00:00

TopOccasion29 · 2019-03-02T10:59:03+00:00

Obviously lol

[deleted] · 2019-03-02T16:48:50+00:00

Prostitution? yes. Other sex work? I would just pump and dump her. It is not instant disqualifier. But it is a biggest red flag ever. So no LTR with such a woman who sells her looks like that. I can give a benefit of a doubt to professional model, but even then it is slippery slope.

couldbemage · 2019-03-02T21:48:49+00:00

Of course, but I'm not a piller.

MisterJose · 2019-03-03T00:26:07+00:00

For marrying, yeah very likely. Not for just dating, though.

LoseMoneyAllWeek · 2019-03-03T00:30:54+00:00

lol is this a real question

Keepit2gether405 · 2019-03-03T03:58:37+00:00

Most heterosexual men, are extremely insecure about sexuality. You know it's totally not ok to use your body/persona, for capital gain? insert sarcasm Your profession probably intimidates them. Thats why I don't date men anymore. Women are much more intune with sex, and tend to be more open minded. It would be rare to find a man who understands the sex work industry. However, I wish you luck.

zayelion · 2019-03-03T07:24:39+00:00

I wouldnt date her if she was doing the job. I'd also monitor her general spending habits and keep an eye out for sudden changes in cash flow.

Clit-cheese · 2019-03-03T17:55:01+00:00

Prostitution, no. Too many risks involved with STDs also imo relationships should be intimate, hence why I can't do open ones either.

I'd have less problems with camgirls or erotic models, as long as they remain intimate with their SO.

Suyeda422 · 2019-03-11T23:10:08+00:00

I personally would say yes. For me personally it's because:
1.) It's like an intimate thing you shared by not making it intimate (loss of value)

2.) I wouldn't be okay with my son / daughter doing it so I wouldn't want the mother of them to have done it before.

3.) It's now on the internet forever and like I / our friends / our families could find it.

4.) There are so many girls in the world, why would I date someone that has been a sex worker by choice vs just dating a girl who chose not to. I don't think in any case it's a plus for anyone I feel like it's generally only a minus or neutral at best.

DaphneDK42 · 2019-03-01T14:54:02+00:00

Yes. Why would anyone want to be in a monogamous relationship with a single whore, when you could buy a new one every time? Makes no sense.

AyeThatsAGoodNagger · 2019-03-01T17:14:09+00:00

I would never under any circumstances date a hooker or porn star, but realistically, I’m so desperate that I probably would date a stripper, cam girl, or twitch or instagram whore. If I had any large number of options though, I would not.

It highlights our major difference in values, specifically her placing money before modesty.
She probably still has a legion of thirsty men messaging her constantly, and she’ll likely fuck one of them the second she gets dissatisfied with me. Even if she doesn’t, she will never have to rely on me to make her feel good about herself. Her army of orbiters will already do that for her. So what am I even there for? I’m just her biggest donator.
A woman who did that for a living likely has a slew of personality traits that would make a relationship with me difficult and short-lived. Vanity, superficiality, overly high self-esteem, narcissism, entitlement, low intelligence. She’s probaby pretty obnoxious.

Sir_Koopaman · 2019-03-01T15:19:26+00:00

Absolutely yes. Anyone who disagrees with me is either an ultra-simp or a woman disguising herself as a man online

[deleted] · 2019-03-01T16:29:23+00:00

Yes. I don't want such women in a LTR.

But many sex workers find partners. You know how? They lie.

We don't have how to know their pasts. So they just lie and go with it.

I met some girls like that. I never had LTRs with any, but still, felt wrong been lied to.

I can trust my bank manager than women I sleep with. Bank managers at least have a reason to not lie that much and I can discover their past.

Title	Would you disqualify a girl for dating if she was a sex worker?
Author	shonenhikada
Upvotes	40
Comments	327
Date	March 1, 2019 1:28 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/aw4w2c/would_you_disqualify_a_girl_for_dating_if_she_was/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/would-you-disqualify-a-girl-for-dating-if-she-was.256971 https://theredarchive.com/post/256971

Comments