I’ve noticed a recurring pattern both on social media and in real life, where women’s judgment of men’s interactions with women shifts entirely based on the outcome rather than the behavior itself. This inconsistency makes their advice difficult to rely on.

On social media:

A guy approaches a woman politely and respectfully in a calm, appropriate setting. If she reacts negatively, the comments are filled with criticism: calling him creepy, pushy, or even accusing him of harassment.

Meanwhile, a guy in another video might approach a woman in a way that would generally be considered inappropriate—interrupting her when she’s busy, approaching from behind, or while she has headphones on. If she reacts positively (likely because she’s attracted to him), the comments flip completely. People praise him for being confident and suggest other men should take notes.

In real life: I’ve experienced this personally when showing female friends texts I’ve sent to women to get their opinion. If they don’t know the woman’s response, they’ll often say things like, “That’s too direct,” or, “That could come off as pushy.” But if I reveal that the woman responded positively, they suddenly change their tune: “Wow, that was a great message!”

Female opinions on these interactions seem heavily influenced by how the approached woman reacts and how attractive the guy is in general. If the woman finds him appealing or gives a positive response, the interaction is praised. If she doesn’t, the same behavior can be condemned.

This inconsistency suggests that women’s advice on social interactions is often preselective and outcome-driven, making it unreliable for men. Instead of seeking advice influenced by subjective factors, men should focus on personal experience and consistent principles to navigate these situations.