Morals don't matter compared to how attractive you are physically, socially, and sexually

Icy_Ordinary2025 · 2023-10-18T02:54:00+00:00

Yup, people with trauma will usually date abusers resulting in a pretty toxic relationship.

If a toxic relationship is what you desire. Go for it. Just be aware of the consequences of being an abuser.

Trikger · 2023-10-18T03:47:09+00:00

Well, since you put a serial killer on the list... let's add another one.

Jeffrey Dahmer, much like Bundy, had his own group of women swooning and drooling over him. He regularly had female fans sending him nudes and love letters in through the mail.

If you're not aware: Jeffrey Dahmer is very much gay. It was clear no fangirl ever actually stood a chance. Unlike Bundy, Dahmer did not have ASPD ("psychopathy") and thereby lacked any form of superficial charm.

Alongside Borderline Personality Disorder, Dahmer was also diagnosed with Schizotypal Personality Disorder. Symptoms of the disorder are a lack of close friends, excessive social anxiety, limited affect (monotone/"robotic" speech), odd and eccentric behavior/appearance, and thoughts of paranoia. When it comes to personality and behavior, Dahmer truly stood out from the other notorious serial killers. To be blunt: He was a very strange man.

Looking at pictures of Jeffrey, I wouldn't say he's much of a stunner. Combined with his personality and sexuality, it doesn't quite make sense why so many women obsessed over him.

But there is another infamous serial killer that begs the same question.

John Wayne Gacy had no shortage of women to choose from once he found himself stuck in prison. Too bad he was into men... and boys.

Was Gacy an attractive man? Standing at circa. 5'9" and 230 lb, Pogo the Clown wasn't much of a looker.

Maybe looks isn't what gets certain women to fall for these kinds of men.

Egoistchan · 2023-10-18T02:57:31+00:00

You forget that all the women writing love letters to Ted Bundy were pretty mentally/emotionally fucked up themselves. Most healthy and intelligent people can acknowledge Bundy was ok looking but still find his acts disgusting and despicable, and would never overlook them in spite of his appearance.

This is also pretty subjective. I never understood why women find Richard Ramirez hot, for example.The dude had rotten little corn cob teeth, cluster b skin picking sores, and allegedly always smelt like an unwashed ass. He got proposed to multiple times and in fact did end up getting married. I don't get it and I don't want to, tbh.

Bay-AreaGuy · 2023-10-18T16:57:36+00:00

Pretty much. What both incels and their snarky feminist critics get wrong is that they apply the just-world fallacy to dating. The former think the reason they can’t get any is because women are vapid and shallow, and the latter think incels’ bad character is why they’re lonely in the first place.

The truth is, there’s no link between character and attractiveness to the opposite sex, at least not initially - and that applies to both sexes.

This should be obvious - and I posit that it would make lonely men feel a lot less crappy about their situation - but unfortunately, the just-world fallacy is deeply ingrained in American society.

operation-spot · 2023-10-18T03:07:45+00:00

Morals matter but looks are the first filter and there’s nothing wrong with that because attraction does matter. I don’t think anyone said morals helped you get into a relationship but they’re important for compatibility. If it’s only a hookup morals really don’t matter because you’re not spending a substantial amount of time together so the only issue is safety which I’d argue is the same as morals but that’s just me.

Anyone who’s worth being with cares about morals and the people who don’t aren’t people you should be with because they excuse harm.

Mobrowncheeks · 2023-10-18T03:53:47+00:00

I feel like you guys don’t know what the word attract means.

Literally all it means is to allure, to bring attention to, to bring towards something.

This has nothing to do with your morals, this has nothing to do with building or maintaining relationships. This has nothing to do with being toxic.

Moral compass , more like moral alignment is what makes people willing to be open to building a relationship with you. Full stop. If someone has something extreme, then people who are average are more likely to accept certain characteristics for that. And this still has nothing to do with being sexually or physically abused

awesomesauceeee · 2023-10-18T02:31:55+00:00

Absolutely freezing cold take … 😴

totallyworkinghere · 2023-10-18T02:41:09+00:00

None of those people introduced themselves as horrible. They were very good at hiding it.

Acting like an amoral lunatic helps no one. Acting like a decent person is the way to go. Most people will then actually be a decent person because most people feel normal amounts of empathy.

ROBYoutube · 2023-10-18T03:02:48+00:00

It's weird you guys look at this shit and think 'I don't have to stop being a complete dickhead' instead of 'Wow if I achieve something that makes me world renowned, then I can still be an absolute piece of shit!'

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2023-10-18T02:44:17+00:00

There is no morality in attraction. It's either there or it isn't.

MrBrittle · 2023-10-18T02:50:06+00:00

Black Pill

baiser_vole · 2023-10-18T03:54:14+00:00

Superficial values determine your league, then morals determine who you get to meet among the ones you can afford to meet using your superficial values.

HighestTierMaslow · 2023-10-18T05:16:35+00:00

All of these things matter and are weighed at slightly different rates among people

CryptoThroway8205 · 2023-10-18T14:01:38+00:00

Boston marathon bomber literally had women who were defending him saying he couldn't have done it that he was too attractive. I remember reddit was only talking about who he was and accusing random people but when he was found out some women formed facebook groups on his attractiveness.

I think it's just that fame made him liked by more people. Eg. if 1% of women are living in delulu land then of the millions that saw him that's still a lot that like that mophead bomber.

Cool_Relative7359 · 2023-10-18T14:53:52+00:00

The fact you think predatory men used anything but unethical predatory practices to be "successful" with people is wild.

WilliamWyattD · 2023-10-18T04:31:36+00:00

The OP is obviously overdone. Of course more than looks matters in getting a relationship, and definitely in having a good one.

But in the bigger picture, why would one even ask this question about male morals and female attraction, and not the other way around? We are looking at legacy effects from an older time and system. But today's women want agency. They are not a prize to be won by men for being decent or hardworking. Just like men, women have their own needs, and also just like men, some of those needs are not what we might ideally want them to be. But they are what they are.

You don't earn a woman anymore. You choose one and if you are lucky, she chooses you back. Two people with agency complicates things by essentially raising the complexity level to the power of two. But what you gonna do? Women wanna be full peoples now or some shit. Go figure.

13choppedup2chopped · 2023-10-18T02:33:45+00:00

Two things can be true: attractiveness is the trump card and morals are important for leading a healthy, happy, and prosperous life.

MistyMaisel · 2023-10-18T03:10:44+00:00

To be fair, I doubt any of these men went right to the abuse, rape, and murder. The thing about people like that, is that they look and act just like you and me until they start swinging, murdering, or penising.

I don't think there's a lot of overlooking it since it isn't there until it is. And once they knew who these people were, if they were still alive, they tended to leave um and avoid um.

Morals are in fact a big part of keeping a relationship and that relationship remaining happy (which is always oddly left out). And you have to meet a general bare minimum to get one from the majority of humans.

SyrusDrake · 2023-10-18T09:20:14+00:00

This is such a weird and yet often repeated take.

"People claim they need a car with lots of cargo space and seating for children, yet Ferraris are still sold. Hence, all people are lying!"
No, it's just that different people need, want, and value different things.

Some women are shallow, and only care about looks. Some women have mental issue that make them attracted to serial killers. Some women, unfortunately, get tricked by abusers. None of this proves, in any way, that all women everywhere universally don't care about morals. That's very basic logic.

LMS_THEORY_ · 2023-10-18T12:38:00+00:00

Dark Triad's success over the years validates your position, granted the man has elite aesthetics. I wouldn't go so far as serial killer, but an 7+/10 who 'breaks the rules' or a bit of a 'bad boy's can absolutely have his choice of all but the most pious women

TSquaredRecovers · 2023-10-18T17:31:31+00:00

“It’s clear that if you are an attractive person physically, sexually, and socially, people are willing to overlook your morals, to the point where it doesn’t even matter.”

This is not even remotely true of most people. There is a small percentage of men and women who struggle with past trauma (particularly stemming from childhood), severe mental health issues, and/or substance issues who are drawn to people that are extremely morally corrupt. This idea that most women are pining over serial killers, thugs, and other morally reprehensible people is just blatantly false.

Fit_Instruction3646 · 2023-10-18T18:26:00+00:00

Maybe they don't in many cases but they should matter and they do matter in my personal case. I would say I'm in a happy committed relationship and I must say that although neither I nor my girlfriend are 10/10 physically, we still have a better relationship than many people I know who are only after the money or looks. I wouldn't be in this relationship if she wasn't a wonderful person and she probably wouldn't be if I weren't one.

Now, I know how the thinking goes, you gotta be the bad boys, nice guys finish last, etc. and I kinda agree that's sadly how it is very often in our crappy fallen society. But it doesn't have to be that way. It's all about values and priorities. Most of us were thought the wrong values and now have the wrong priorities. People don't know how to be happy and how to make other people happy. And because everyone's a dick in our modern world, nice guys do finish last most of the times. But if we were prioritizing being good people and finding our good people, society would be better off as whole. Rebel against society by being a good person despite the powerful incentives not to be, be ready to suffer for it and even if nothing good comes out of it, you will know you had been a good person.

TheAvocadoSlayer · 2023-10-18T22:32:43+00:00

Therefore, morals don't really help you get a relationship.

You're right they don't. Morals only matter for people who don't want to end up with a crazy person. If you got low standards, whether it's for having sex or LTR, morals won't be a dealbreaker.

januaryphilosopher · 2023-10-18T06:44:03+00:00

Those men presented themselves as exactly the sort of nice, kind, decent men that men on here criticise women for not wanting. Nobody is able to prioritise your secret morality that they don't know about, they can only choose who to date based on information on the surface.

George69143 · 2023-10-18T03:49:40+00:00

Women usually like bad people more. They think it makes men more masculine to be inconsiderate and/or crazy.

ATasteofTx214 · 2023-10-18T03:08:20+00:00

Doing a bad thing doesn't make you a bad person. The worst thing you've ever done doesn't eliminate the great things you do. A violent drug dealer can b a loving and attentive dad; a devoted and revered pastor can be a violent child rapist. People aren't all good or evil. We're complex and dynamic and capable of a full range of actions given the circumstance and opportunity.

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Excellent_Badger123 · 2023-10-18T05:08:28+00:00

The moral part matters a lot to me, it always has. I wouldn’t be with a man who didn’t largely share my moral code which includes honesty, kindness and empathy for all humans. I’ve evolved over time to give less or nothing to people that are either passive net takers or are so damaged that I can’t help them & they are clinging to me like a drowning person to a life raft. Self preservation mode kicks in at some point.

CharmingEmotionn · 2023-10-18T09:15:19+00:00

I have a list of 7 short men that are in relationships. Therefore, height doesn’t matter in relationships. Case closed.

MidoriEgg · 2023-10-18T10:47:26+00:00

And water is wet…

Swofffffff · 2023-10-18T10:54:24+00:00

As guys we blame women for this but my opinion it’s based on expectation.

We all know guys who are crazy over a hot girl that is bitchy, aggressive nasty and selfish and treats people badly, but people still chase her and act like fools for her.

Men are shocked because they believe what women say when they pretend not to be superficial.

That’s why we get surprised when a woman will swear up and down a man is evil, he leaves her on read and pumps and dumps her every so often. But she always seems to crawl back to him.

What’s more mens rude awakening is how contrasting this is with expectation when you find such a woman will never give that guy any vexation, instead they trauma dump onto other men that are loyal and friendly.

It’s the same behaviour, women in my opinion just take it further.

Because a guy when he gets treated badly by a hot girl won’t take it out on a dependable mid girl.. he’ll just settle.

But bad women often display behaviours that are truly awful. She gets pumped and dumped but rather than vex the guy she chased, heavens no, then maybe she’ll never get that crumb of validation.. instead she’ll lash out at one of her orbiters.

It’s just more stark for men because we see a woman not just being a doormat and willingly taking any abusive behaviour from the guy she craves that treats her badly but actually being aggressively cruel to the nicer guys, because 1. They’ll pathetically take it, 2. She wouldn’t dare do it to the guy she likes and never get validation again.

Saddest thing is guys not realising you must say no to women. When she asks for marriage level effort from you when she is keeping you at arms length, e.g “oh can you come help me move house” “can you fix this in my house” it’s not because she finally wants to give you a chanceS

It’s because she has zero respect for you or sexual interest, she would not dare ask the guy who leaves her on read to do that, for fear of rejection even further and finally being the simp and doing this for her in a twisted way is the simp just making her life easier for the guy she really wants to bang her.

We’re all human beings there are just as many selfish women as there are selfish men.

thelightinmydarkness · 2023-10-18T13:56:05+00:00

I seem to have a different take than most people but obviously- the reason is more intricate than you think. I do not know where you live but most people are not virtuous/altruistic people (I do live right by LA, which is full of shallow people, though, but you should make your own observations about people).

The kinds of people who value looks etc over anything are already establishing themselves as shallow and therefore do not care about values.

Alas, good morals/virtues like Jordan Peterson’s rules for example makes someone reliable and a good father which is extremely attractive. We see in studies of primates that females oftentimes would get with a caring, virtuous, romantic, dare I say (?) primate after having their babies since they made for good fathers.

TenaciousVillain · 2023-10-18T15:47:43+00:00

The problem with this argument is that people don’t put their morals on display. Deceptive, immoral people go out of their way to make you believe they have good intentions when they don’t. You can’t judge a person’s morals in 60 seconds. Sometimes not even 60 days. These things take time and arguably it isn’t until these people reveal their true colors that a person is in a position to reject them over it. So you really haven’t provided any compelling evidence to support your argument

Lower-Conflict5394 · 2023-10-18T17:01:53+00:00

I think it has already been shown that those who have personalities that are consistent with traits that make them abusive towards others are more successful in attracting male or female partners.

Morality works to have a social circle without unreformed criminals or partners who are emotionally dependent or who are as bad as their own partner by default or actively.

As someone who has not had a partner, it was really upsetting to think that I was not worthy of having a partner, unlike bullies, drug addicts at school, or those who repeated subjects for no reason Strive and fail but for those who didn't care in the slightest.

When I started a job where i realise somethings just looking what some do I realized that morality is irrelevant to being attractive and that I do not and will never want any woman who has dated broken or immoral people because it is Symptom that they are immoral themselves or have such a screwed up personality that they allow themselves to be influenced to maintain a relationship with people who hurt them and both are huge red flags.

Emily_Earnshaw · 2023-10-18T22:58:35+00:00

Ted Bundy had only one relationship while serial killer in prison and the woman thought he was innocent and dropped him before he was even executed. I guess it finally registered in her little head that he was not innocent. Bundy actually was super courteous and friendly. First day with his ex, the one before he was arrested, he was already cooking her pancakes and he was raising her daughter and he was taking his child brother for trips. So he didn't seem immoral at all.

Also, Bundy was not hot really. He only had fans later because he was an accessible celebrity to those girls.

Spyro7x3 · 2023-10-18T23:38:52+00:00

No morals don’t matter it’s settled science you can’t attract women with morals morality and virtue is internally important for men don’t be a goody two shoes and judge others all the time

ktdotnova · 2023-10-19T05:18:55+00:00

Throw in Deshaun Watson and Kevin Porter Jr... Joshua Primo.

Title	Morals don't matter compared to how attractive you are physically, socially, and sexually
Author	AndlenaRaines
Upvotes	78
Comments	192
Date	October 18, 2023 2:28 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/17afv41/morals_dont_matter_compared_to_how_attractive_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/morals-dont-matter-compared-to-how-attractive-you.1235481 https://theredarchive.com/post/1235481

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