How to ask if she has a BF without being weird?

Gooquleimages · 2022-07-22T15:55:54+00:00

In normal conversation there is a high chance she will naturally mention her boyfriend if she has one

see_four · 2022-07-22T17:00:44+00:00

She'll let you know bro don't worry

Therocksays2020 · 2022-07-22T15:48:47+00:00

It’s a dumb question. Just flirt and if she has a boyfriend she will mention it.

comeonmanpod · 2022-07-22T16:47:41+00:00

There's zero reason to do that. If she has a boyfriend, she'll bring it up.

Mundane_Natural5131 · 2022-07-22T19:03:20+00:00

I girl once asked me to hangout through text and then i said im down and she said oh but wont your girlfriend get mad? Now that i look back she was cheking if i had a girl without asking

Early_Belt_5551 · 2022-07-22T18:35:09+00:00

If she likes you, she's single

Moist_Meaning_597 · 2022-07-22T16:37:01+00:00

You don't.

GreatScotRace · 2022-07-22T16:33:02+00:00

Just talk to her like a normal person. If she has a BF she will probably mention it in passing.

Subject-Craft5870 · 2022-07-22T15:54:03+00:00

You never ask a woman if she has a boyfriend. You simply do not care. You ask her on a date. That’s it. Don’t care if she has 1 boyfriend or 1000 boyfriends, if you want her to go on a date with you, ask her out.

Edit …. If she has a boyfriend and she’s committed to him, she will casually mention her significant other … but you don’t care anyways…

EARLY20RAG3R · 2022-07-22T18:50:25+00:00

Dont ask if she has a bf, if she does she’ll mention it in case shes not interested.

If you ask if she has a bf you might come off as afraid from barriers, be bold and flirty

ohsnapt · 2022-07-22T18:49:55+00:00

just cause she is single doesnt mean shes going to date you

bad question anyway

she will tell you if she is not single

P7o7s7t7a7l · 2022-07-22T17:55:40+00:00

I never ask, but assume. Make her mention she does.

The way to approach is to just ask her out or get her phone number. She should mention it then.

wzd_cracks · 2022-07-22T19:32:20+00:00

Yeah like some said just flirt and talk to her she will eventually let you know she has bf

ikeepon · 2022-07-22T21:11:58+00:00

Don’t ask. Assume she doesn’t until she volunteers that she does.

devilkingx2 · 2022-07-23T00:25:30+00:00

You don't have to ask usually because if she wants you to know (she's not interested) she'll tell you.

If she doesn't want you to know then either she's single or you probably have a shot and it doesn't matter.

djeewin · 2022-07-23T12:45:04+00:00

Don’t

Just assume she doesn’t and if she does, she will tell you herself without you having to ask

Romantic_Adventurer · 2022-07-22T16:24:54+00:00

If you are doing your thing correctly, they will tell you or ask you. If you have to ask, maybe you should focus on something else first.

ericviking007 · 2022-07-22T17:34:03+00:00

“Are you single”

ston96 · 2022-07-23T10:14:32+00:00

now why would that matter my good sir!

WiiWynn · 2022-07-22T20:11:41+00:00

Don’t ask is my preference. Then you’re putting her in a position where she either has to lie, tell you she’s seeing lots of guys and defend herself from being viewed a slut, or whatever. Rarely will you meet a girl that’s really just single.

This day and age girls definition of single is so broad and nonuniform. I mean, they’re literally fucking guys, but ‘don’t have a bf’. Like what do else do you need to declare relationship status, matching tattoos? ‘Deep emotional connections’? Give me a break.

Edit: oh, just realized you meant for someone you’ve just met. Lol. Still, don’t. Make your moves and if she’s receptive, keep going.

Narudatsu · 2022-07-23T00:00:00+00:00

For ppl who are saying she’ll let you know some of them don’t. Sometimes hoes are hoes and relationships aren’t stable. I met a girl my freshman year of college and got her back to my room. While we were making out and right before we could fuck, she stopped and said she had a bf. He goes to another uni and she couldn’t go thru with it. Wasted my whole night and hopes rather than finding out earlier when I met her a week before.

Best way I’ve asked is when you first meet them and you’re just flirting be like “isn’t your bf gonna worry you’re up late?” Or something along those lines. Then she’ll correct you if she doesn’t have a bf or confirm there is a bf in the background.

Another time at a nightclub a girl wanted to dance with me and I asked “where’s your bf” confirmed she didn’t have a bf. But sometimes, it’s completely fine to ask if she just has a bf. It’s better you find out early than lead yourself on.

BreakDance4cash · 2022-07-22T16:17:41+00:00

Picture it like this my G, If you don't bring up her bf, she won't bring up her bf, heck she might even tell u she has a bf after she hooks up with you 😌

Calamity__Bane · 2022-07-22T16:57:07+00:00

Don’t ask, she’ll tell you if it’s important.

DigLucky3112 · 2022-07-22T17:02:21+00:00

I've got a classic you can use, wait until she does something nice for somebody, like a little gesture and then say i bet you make your boyfriend very happy!

Then you will usually get an indication of whether she has a bf or not by her response!

dmt-Ntity · 2022-07-22T17:14:28+00:00

Knowing what's weird, helps

cmski29 · 2022-07-22T23:04:27+00:00

"You got a boyfriend?"

indigocoloor · 2022-07-23T02:09:17+00:00

Don’t ask just shoot your shot

Walmart_Feet23 · 2022-07-23T02:25:44+00:00

"Hey, do you have anyone that'd feel some kind of way if I took you out?"

thrustboi · 2022-07-23T14:16:54+00:00

Dude I am sorry. She will bring it up. It’s fucking crushing when that happens. Like “Did I ask?” Even though we want to know.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-07-22T16:36:08+00:00

Overthinking even the most simple stuff. Next thing someone’s gonna ask “how do i find out if someone likes to drink water”. What happen to men here? Second guessing every little fucking thing and acting like they need to walk on eggshells… What a bunch of pussies.

You: Do you have a boyfriend?”

Her: “Yes/no”

You: “Cool, now i’m more/less interested in you”

There done. That’s all there is to it. If things are weird so fucking be it

Repulsive-Fee393 · 2022-07-22T22:17:50+00:00

Ask her dumbass, why are you, as a man, worried about coming across as weird? We are men, we’re inherently trying to fuck everything that moves. You should be more concerned about your gym pr’s and hitting your macros my man. And if she asks why you’re asking, be blunt and tell her cos shes hot and you have to ask.

itsonlybliss · 2022-07-22T17:33:23+00:00

Only weird if you make it weird. Casually asking if they have a partner mid conversation works.

WannaSeeTrustIssues · 2022-07-22T22:45:13+00:00

"So, what does your bf do for a living?"

SeanBatemanJr · 2022-07-22T19:44:51+00:00

I personally always try to ask a girl if she’s single right after I open with a compliment. It both gives her a chance to not mention she has a boyfriend (which a lot of time is preferable) if she is interested — but also mention one if she wants to and definitely mention one if it’s very serious. At other times I follow a «don’t ask, don’t tell» policy. I think if a girl is interested she might not mention a boyfriend and if for some reason she loses interest — she might mention one. But it’s not necessarily advantageous to force her to clarify the issue, because a lot of girls have some kind of casual relationship.

Panik88 · 2022-07-22T23:11:20+00:00

Are you seeing anyone?

copywhisperer · 2022-07-23T00:01:47+00:00

Don’t ask if she has a boyfriend. Ask if she is single.

youshallhaveeverbeen · 2022-07-23T00:04:08+00:00

"Are you single?"

shewolf- · 2022-07-22T22:44:07+00:00

Fuck... I've been talking to a guy for 3 months and he never mentioned dating anyone. Like I asked him all the time what he was doing on the weekend. And he never mentioned dates or S/O for 3 months! We have spend numerous hours together. It was weird to say the least.

He was definitely not telling me on purpose. Then I asked him out and he finally said he was dating someone. I was crushed..

mojojojo2069 · 2022-07-22T17:01:57+00:00

You nice guy. Don't ask, either her friends will pop up reminding her she has a bf, and then two things can happen.

She walks away

Or she protests that didn't put a ring on it, and the party goes on.

mabden · 2022-07-22T18:37:33+00:00

You don't. If she has a boy friend, how soon she mentions that she does, will tell you how loyal to the guy.

Ohhhwordddd · 2022-07-22T18:43:16+00:00

You don’t. I’m currently trying to get at this one chick who Im almost positive has a man but I’m still going at it cause she hasn’t mentioned him yet. 🤷🏽‍♂️

sydlouise · 2022-07-22T20:48:47+00:00

Most of us casually talk about our men… so just have a normal conversation. Also, idk why guys try to act like just asking is a bad thing? I’ve always found it respectful.

Successful_Teach366 · 2022-07-23T00:52:15+00:00

I was told never to ask from others that had hella game. Supposedly it gives women the chance to second guess you and just say yes just to be safe. (Not for men). What I did was just show hella interest by actually saying and annunciating the word ‘date’. Like I definitely need to take you out on a date because it shows your romantic interest right away and get straight to the point. That’s how I found my wife today

hagakurejunkie · 2022-07-22T17:26:25+00:00

If she’s into you and wants to hang out, whoever the guy in her life is, isn’t important. Everyone; both men and women are always talking to someone.

If its a girl that hooked up with a guy I know, I stay hands off but a lot of guys wouldn’t even extend that courtesy

Murrman1978 · 2022-07-22T17:11:26+00:00

If you see a group of people say this:

"How do you all know each other?"

incognito3107 · 2022-07-22T18:17:32+00:00

You can just casually mention him in any context. If she is interested in you, she will gladly tell you that she is single.

modidlee · 2022-07-22T18:33:47+00:00

I was talking to a lady a week ago and she mentioned how she barely knew how to work the infotainment system of her car. I said “your boyfriend or husband probably does though.” She says “There’s no boyfriend or husband.” Cool. I usually say something like “I bet your man hates being away from you.“ Now if she says there is no man she could be lying. But if she’ll lie to you about that it means she wants to keep talking to you.

Viktor2500 · 2022-07-22T19:02:06+00:00

In the context that she is in her early twenties, you can jokingly ask her whether she is married or single.

Iamnotthatguypall · 2022-07-22T19:19:45+00:00

You don’t ask

brigitteLac · 2022-07-22T19:29:17+00:00

As a woman I’d say, just flat out aka her do you have a bf, what does your bf say / think about, what did you do this weekend? Did you go out with… I don’t know something direct , she’ll get the hint if she interested, if she’s not she’ll say “ I did this/went there with my bf…” Guys, honesty and directness communicate confidence and us women live that. Just ask it with a natural tone, like you have nothing to gain Or lose either way, as if you were talking to a buddy

inline6throwaway · 2022-07-22T19:36:50+00:00

If you feel weird then you will be weird

Conformist5589 · 2022-07-22T19:45:28+00:00

Just talk to her. If she brings it up back off. If she doesn’t say anything and you find out she does have a boyfriend later also back off because she’s a clown. If she doesn’t say anything and she’s single go for it.

ELOLiZzLe · 2022-07-22T20:15:34+00:00

You don’t…

ORIONFULL23 · 2022-07-22T20:20:15+00:00

Let's assume that she doesn't have a boyfriend unless she says so, ask her out and see how she reacts

sonickid101 · 2022-07-22T20:25:09+00:00

Unless she has a ring on her finger boyfriends are just speedbumps with names. Proceed with your game as if no possible boyfriend ever exists and never ask and never bring it up. Any other evidence of men in her life are to be assumed to be brothers or cousins.

marshmellow0134 · 2022-07-22T20:42:53+00:00

I had a man ask me for my number and all and then ask if I had a boyfriend after I said yes. That was ok.

Broad-Literature-438 · 2022-07-22T20:45:09+00:00

Why ask? Just talk and if you see the window, shoot your shot. If she never mentions a bf and she has one, you didnt know and it'll be fine. She'll just say that she does and you'll take that as a no and move on. If she doesn't have one, then the question doesn't matter. And for option no. 3, if she has one and still likes you anyways, she might just go along and you two can have fun anyways (just imo, idk if I'd date option 3, only if you just wanna have fun yknow)

schmurdalol · 2022-07-22T21:00:33+00:00

Where's your man at?

OgreNOut · 2022-07-22T21:42:02+00:00

Why show her boyfriend more consideration than her? Express interest

nbh1995 · 2022-07-22T21:47:45+00:00

Never ask. Wait for her to bring it up then say "I dont care" thats the way to go my brother

Zyrocks · 2022-07-22T21:49:19+00:00

I actually applied this one recently.

I would see this chick about 5 mins each day and I was into her. So I had to know whether she had a bf or not. I decided to be like "Hey, I'm pretty sure I saw you at Costco last night with your boyfriend, was that you? Based on her reply, you'll most likely get the idea wether she does or not.

The girl I applied it too said "We haven't been at costco recently" So I got my answer. About 2 weeks later I said fck it and asked her out to lunch and she said she couldn't cause she had a BF lol.. I killed myself right there. I still see her on day to day bases and we're chill.

kingpoonslayer · 2022-07-22T21:58:20+00:00

She'll only let you know if she's not attracted to you.

user009818 · 2022-07-22T23:08:11+00:00

You don't mention it, I find it cringe when people flirt and still ask , like nah bro it don't even matter at that point

Pbear4Lyfe · 2022-07-22T23:30:32+00:00

I try to say something that makes it look like I'm assuming she already has a boyfriend and then let her either confirm or correct you

SeaBreezy209 · 2022-07-22T23:30:43+00:00

you ask her out

Kevin26039898 · 2022-07-22T23:35:12+00:00

Did you get Valentine's gift last year

Gnostromo · 2022-07-22T23:52:01+00:00

Never ask this.

Just ask her out assuming she does not.

She will say yes or no

LegiTLTB · 2022-07-23T00:08:27+00:00

You never ask. If she has a boyfriend, she will casually bring him up. Never ask that. Be cool and try to not send those creep vibes. Just be cool.

cormacru999 · 2022-07-23T00:40:19+00:00

The weird part is that anyone thinks its weird to ask. The way this becomes an issue is when men are attracted to women, but don't say it & become friends. The woman thinks they are friends, but the man is obsessing about a romantic relationship. Then he finally reveals it & she's upset because now she figures that's the end of the friendship because men often can't handle being friends with a woman they wanted to date.

I'm almost 50, & I've been friend with women & never dated, I've been coworkers, then dated, then broke up & stayed coworkers, I've been friends, then dated, then broke up & stayed friends. Never in any friendship or relationship was I confused about where we stood.

The friendzone is a male myth that men created because they struggle to separate their attraction to their actions, they often can't be friends with women they aren't attracted to, because they are often focused on dating or sex or both & they often don't see women as anything more than that. They see women as fuckable or not fuckable & women know this even better than men do.

But no matter what situation you're in, honesty is best, & if you've been spending time with her & you don't know if she has a partner, then you're either not really friends with her or not spending that much time with her or she doesn't have one. But if you're spending time with her in hopes of dating/sleeping with her, then its best for you both to say so. Then she'll know & can decide what she wants knowing that.

(note: I don't bother to read all the upset reactions to what I say)

waspmaker · 2022-07-23T00:50:43+00:00

Depends man, I go in with a mindset that I am okay to walk away from the table if things don't go my way. But if you think you don't wanna risk it then try this.

"I have been lucky to have girlfriend/s who have taken great care of me." It's very important to set the atmosphere that you have high standards and you are not actually looking for anything here. Then have a straight face, with no emotions ask "Do have a bf?" If she says yes. If you wanna play further ask "Do you love him?" What ever answer she gives, just smirk and move on to another topic. Key to a woman's heart is subtlety and a good mental tease, if a man masters this art, there is nothing that can stop him. That said as the Master of flirts, Russell Brand once said "You never break a marriage, unless you are really bored"

Play responsibility!

briant519 · 2022-07-23T00:52:58+00:00

If a girl is really into you and you can tell from the obvious signs then you DONT need to ask if she has a bf...now there's also a caveat here - there are also women who are extremely friendly but holding off from telling you she's seeing someone because she knows she won't do anything with you and just is enjoying the attention/knows you're gonna leave if you find out she's seeing someone...in this case you can ask "are you seeing anybody these days" "are you in a commitment with anyone"...but also be aware that just cause she's single doesn't mean she'll fuck you either...so feel free to ask who cares..and just play it from there after that...

Physicist_Dinosaur · 2022-07-23T01:07:27+00:00

You don't need to. Just asume she doesn't.

If she has one, she'll usually let you know. If she has one and doesn't tell you, she's probably not fine with it, and needs someone safe to break up or something.

FranciscotheBull · 2022-07-23T01:08:46+00:00

Well you can ask her two indirect questions to kind of feel for it. You can ask her about her plans on her days off. Sometimes, she will mention a plan with her boyfriend if she has one, but doesn't work all the time. You can also ask what she like to do in her spare time if you haven't asked already.

If you are really interested, you can ask her out directly. The worst she can say is that she has a boyfriend or she isn't interested. If that is it, just take it with grace and you will know. Will also know if you have a chance too.

pdxtrader · 2022-07-23T01:11:47+00:00

Women use “I have a BF” as a shit test all the time. Alphas continue to pursue as betas drops off. The real world solution is to brush it off, act like you didn’t hear what she said, or make a joke about it and use it to demonstrate your value over said BF

tristian_lay · 2022-07-23T01:56:01+00:00

Don’t. She’ll either shit test with the BF drop and if you solider through like a champ she’ll never say it again. If she keeps at it back off

Hunterhunt14 · 2022-07-23T02:26:51+00:00

Just ask if she is seeing anyone but if she is and she likes that person you will know pretty quick

ihasagi2urdicc · 2022-07-23T02:41:27+00:00

You dont

UrFavPlayerIsBack · 2022-07-23T03:06:14+00:00

Never ask. Do what u gotta do

She’ll either vibe w you, or flake excusing bf.. or just cheat. Either way you won’t lose

Subzero_212 · 2022-07-23T03:08:14+00:00

“You talking to anyone?” Tf lmao, this sub’s not even focused on seduction it’s just a bunch of losers who can’t get any play

djderek2003 · 2022-07-23T03:31:38+00:00

don't, if she has one she will mention it if she thinks it's needed.

Ok-Mountain-6890 · 2022-07-23T03:48:02+00:00

If y’all be havin a moment just be like “do you have a boyfriend?”

Osiris_Raphious · 2022-07-23T03:48:54+00:00

If you have flirted and made intent known, she would have told you. So either you are in the friendzone already, or you are not a sexual threat to her relationship that you need be told that there is already a bf.... Either way, try to idk, be more upfront with your interest, if you are rejected stay friendly, and fun and maybe its was shit test you dont know. Point is, if ahe hasnt told you, either there isnt one, or you didnt flirt, and make your intent known. Either way you dont need to ask, just learn the difference between friendliness and flirtatious intent.

Ur_X · 2022-07-23T04:12:03+00:00

You don’t. She will bring it up if she doesn’t welcome your approach.

MK2718 · 2022-07-23T05:11:10+00:00

You make an assumption she does in a statement and wait for her to correct you. "Does your boyfriend let you talk to him like that?" "Did your boyfriend buy you that?" Answers are Yes, No, and I don't have boyfriend.

FlatDistance5 · 2022-07-23T05:16:36+00:00

It is 100% none of your business. Shoot your shot, let her decide if she has a bf or not. Chances are you won’t find out anyways

Pastakingfifth · 2022-07-23T05:32:21+00:00

Yo girl you got a mans? Or ask if her ovaries are getting fertilized on a regular basis or nah?

Harper_1482 · 2022-07-23T05:39:21+00:00

.. he’s not invited….

Argyleuntold · 2022-07-23T06:17:12+00:00

Just when you’re talking about anything random..”you like to that with your boyfriend? “you going with your boyfriend?” “Your boyfriend must like that.”..In a playful way

Vulturo · 2022-07-23T06:18:38+00:00

You don't need to ask. Assume she doesn't or if she does she will dump him for you, or cheat on him at the very least. Make your move. It's her job to tell you she has a boyfriend, not yours to ask.

Bycatania · 2022-07-23T06:21:05+00:00

Just breathe heavily, make intense/awkward eye contact, and ask if she has a macho…

distawest · 2022-07-23T06:25:09+00:00

Never ask! You have a lot to lose and few if any to win. Stay away from this topic

DevuSM · 2022-07-23T08:47:10+00:00

Any escalation she doesn't want she'll let you know. If you back up continue increasing A and try previous escalation, I'd 2nd refusal I usually see no reason to push. Figure if there's any friend value, decide, get your kiss on the cheek and move on

Bluecherrysoft · 2022-07-23T09:05:44+00:00

be better looking and everything you say will sound natural

pusterum · 2022-07-23T11:15:32+00:00

Just ask, without being weird about it

Prestigious_List5878 · 2022-07-23T12:51:07+00:00

Ask with confidence but they'll normally do it on you without asking

Plenty_Software4415 · 2022-07-23T21:19:06+00:00

Never ask lol. If she wants you to know she’ll let you know. If she had a bf and doesn’t want to cheat or whatever, she’ll tell you. If she doesn’t have a bf then well.. she doesn’t have a bf lol

khan114936 · 2022-07-23T21:53:22+00:00

Awww how cute. Do you want cookies and milk with that?

Title	How to ask if she has a BF without being weird?
Author	coir551
Upvotes	202
Comments	194
Date	July 22, 2022 3:44 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/w5dsb1/how_to_ask_if_she_has_a_bf_without_being_weird/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-ask-if-she-has-a-bf-without-being-weird.1253838 https://theredarchive.com/post/1253838

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