I'm a 6/10 on a good day. Decent face card, but not particularly tall or muscular. Also not white, which is a further nerf,
Everybody and their mother knows dating apps are a sausage fest. Any woman who is even half decent-looking is overwhelmed with likes and options. Logically, they would choose the most appealing men from the list. Average men like me obviously stand no chance against the 6'3 athletic frat boy whose parents own 2 mansions.
However, the women who aren't as easy on the eyes can't rely on their list of 1000 likes and actually have to put in the work. Naturally, people punch up their leagues on the apps. Unfortunately for me, and a lot of other men, that means most of the women interested in you will be below your league in terms of looks.
I used to get pretty frustrated with the fact that I could not get any dates with women I actually found attractive. Any woman I matched with who I thought was cute would always ghost me, probably because Chad liked their profile. It made me want to delete the app.
One day, I thought, screw it, I'm going to go on a date with every woman who likes me, who cares what they look like. A better alternative than sitting at home fantasizing about my imaginary dream girlfriend.
One of the smartest decisions of my life. Can't recommend this strategy enough for men.
First of all, women are women regardless of looks. Just having a conversation with a woman is something a ton of guys struggle with. Simply talking to more women will increase your confidence and make you realize it isn't that scary.
Since I wasn't interested in my date physically, I didn't care about trying to impress her or trying to be someone I'm not. I made jokes that I would have never attempted with women I was actually interested in, due to the fear she would find it cringe. I practiced just being myself. I noted down what evoked a positive reaction and what didn't work. Thus, my charisma naturally increased, and so did my confidence.
The more dates you go on, the more you're bound to have bad ones. I went on a date with a girl who was on her phone for like 80% of the time. I straight up said, "It looks like you're having more fun without me, I'm leaving," and walked right out of the cafe without looking back. Way too many men put women on a pedestal these days and put up with disrespectful behavior. I was like that too, but now I've reached the point where if I'm disrespected on a date, I will immediately call her out and not be afraid to leave. Ability to stand up for yourself = increased confidence.
As horrible as it is to admit, I did feel pretty embarrassed at first sitting in public across a 250 lbs purple-haired specimen with a septum piercing as the cherry on top. I kept thinking everyone was going to judge me. But I quickly realized that most people don't really care, and those who do will just make fun of me in their head for 5 seconds, then move on with their lives. Not giving a damn about what others think = increased confidence.
Finally, you would be surprised how some people can look so much better in person than in a picture. Many people take pictures with a bad quality camera, with bad lighting, make weird faces for some reason or just are not photogenic. My ex-girlfriend was a 7/10 in person, but from her pictures, you would have thought she was a 4. I was so shocked, I almost did not recognize her on our first date. Crazy how I thought someone was below my league, but it turned out they were actually above it.
Just a disclaimer, I have never led any of those women on. After our date, I always tell them I didn't feel the spark, better off as friends, etc. I don't condone pumping and dumping.
I believe a huge portion of attractiveness for a man actually comes from confidence and just being experienced with women. Because of how much more confidence and experience I have, I get dates from women I actually like now. I have no problem now chatting up women and flirting with them in person, and finally ditching the apps. I could have never imagined myself doing that 2 years ago. All thanks to my genius strategy that I won't gatekeep anymore
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