317,196 posts

I'm Rollo Tomassi, Ask Me Anything

by Rollo-Tomassi on /r/TheRedPill
27 October 2016 06:11 PM UTC
Reddit View

Not really sure how much of an introduction I need here, but I'm Rollo Tomassi author of The Rational Male and The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine.

If you've been at all active on this sub you'll no doubt have seen my name or blog come up in comments. I also have several of my more seminal posts linked on the reading list sidebar here. I'm also considered one of the three 'R's of the manosphere (Roissy, Rollo, Roosh).

I haven't done an AMA in about a year and a half, so fire away with the questions. I will answer pretty much everything, but just know I'm known for having quite an extensive library of previous posts so I may link you to an essay I've written in the past if I think it'll answer your question more adequately.



Twitter: @RationalMale Gab: @Rollo-Tomassi

Want to download the post?
Similar Posts


25 upvotesStoicCrane3 years ago

In the afterward of TRM volume one you mentioned that there are bloggers who use game in a Christianized context that you genuinely promote. In a sense isn't this contradiction sinse game and sexual strategy are amoralistic in nature? Many TRP users are encouraged to abandon religious constraints due in part to the fact that a majority of them have become conduits for feminine sexual plurism, especially Christianity. Due to the underlying system feminist corruption of religion shouldn't the application of TRP under a religious context be discouraged?

73 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I get this a lot. How can you endorse the promiscuous PUA lifestyle to Christian men. That's not my intent. I think it's vitally important that religious men are made to be Red Pill aware, almost more important than secular guys since so much of their future life's success is at stake if they're inured by what's become a religion by, for and about women.

It's never been in the scope of TRM to decide what religion or not a guy ought to be, but I don't think Red Pill awareness ought to be incumbent upon a belief set. I think Christian men can utilize everything TRP has to offer within the context of how they apply it according to their beliefs. Maybe you're not spinning plates, but it's important for men to have a solid grasp of the nature of the women in their church. Hypergamy doesn't care about religion.

36 upvotesmehdreamer3 years ago

Indeed. I can speak of the moslim world : These pure vigin moslim girls with "modest" clothing are also driven by hypergamy. You'll hear these girls say they're looking for a pious, god fearing simple good husband... but they omit to say good-loooking-preferably-rich, pious, god fearing simple good husband.

Same goes for these vegan, spiritual, eco-friendly, altenative western girls. They want a guy like them, but he must be also good looking with good finances.

These ideologies are just a thin layer that goes on top of the core drive : hypergamy.

17 upvotesexit_sandman3 years ago

Indeed. I can speak of the moslim world : These pure vigin moslim girls with "modest" clothing are also driven by hypergamy. You'll hear these girls say they're looking for a pious, god fearing simple good husband... but they omit to say good-loooking-preferably-rich, pious, god fearing simple good husband.

Probably the most fundamental example for AWALT.

4 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

I think to women it's a given that the guy must be good looking and preferably rich/high status. So they don't even mention it, 'cause like duh'.

22 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

If men actually read their religious books (Bible for my case), and interpret it on their own (with proper research) instead of having a pastor/priest/church shove their versions down their throats, RP is compatible with religion. Hek, being aware/having an RP moment of how twisted Christianity has become due to wordly values years ago made me much more receptive to accepting RP. If even something like Christianity, which has a study guide and basia out in the open called the Bible, could be twisted, why couldn't other values/ideas be?...

2 upvotesMecha753 years ago

I completely agree. I am a recently Red Pill aware married Christian man and it is remarkable at how the books of the bible are actually very pro Red Pill. Not the PUA part of it, but the being the Alpha. The story of Joseph is a perfect biblical example of the Red Pill. You have a man who was sold into slavery. He worked on himself (the original MGTOW?) and improved his station. Even though he was a slave, his glaringly obvious beta Master relied on him to manage his household and his finances. The hypergamous wife (who probably monkey branched her way to her husband) needed Joseph. Joseph was a clear alpha most of his life. Also, in the New Testament, we are exhorted to be the Alpha's for our families. Beta's examples in the bible are actually presented to discourage those behaviors. The case of Nabal and David (David ended up with Nabal's wife Abigail. and no one can argue that David was anything but an Alpha). Another example of discouraging beta behavior was that of King Saul.

Dont get me wrong, christianity is full of nothing but betaized men and for some reason not enough emphasis is placed on the Alpha traits of biblical heros. Especially when it comes to "marriage seminars and retreats." those are more full feminized propaganda to further beta the men.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Christianity is filled with Betas because our message has been blue pilled. They focus on Gods love but IGNORE His justice. Our message has become feel good feminized crap. Most churches do not even talk about repentance for sins...

2 upvotesgjs6283 years ago

Biblically speaking, Christian men are meant to be the head of the household and the very pillars holding up the marriage. The man is stoic, a strong and protective provider and consequently knows what's best through logic and experience. Women are meant to be cherished for their femininity because of their unwavering devotion to their husband. They should support him, submit to him, and never question him. In an ideal relationship, no issues will occur because he will always be fair and she will always be understanding and grateful for what her husband provides. This is the idealised way in which people "should" live.

The reality is that by not living like this, we have men feeling insecure because they've fucked one girl and their girlfriends or wives have fucked 40 guys. Cheating is rife, respect is nowhere to be found, and people only live for themselves and their chance to throw one another under the bus at the first opportunity. Women are taking their husbands to the cleaners by the millions with divorce rape.

Living the way the Bible says regarding many aspects of relationships is good for everyone because it keeps all negativity out, by having you both committing as virgins and being perfect partners forever. It's unfortunate that human nature will never allow this to always happen. Since these morals are no longer enforced, women are free to whore around all they like. Men back then knew what women were like and the Bible was there to create stable partnerships.

I do get that the Bible is written by man and can be vastly contradictory at times, and I wouldn't call myself a Bible-basher, but my Mrs is heavily into Christianity and she is as faithful and loving as they come. No doubt though, things might be different if I wasn't also the man of the household. No amount of religion can keep a bored and repulsed woman together when her man acts like a Pussy.

Then there's all the other stuff: God is perfect and made man perfectly in His image, and being gay is a mortal sin, yet God created people who were born gay and is now condemning them for something that isn't their fault? Things like that I don't quite understand. I think that if there's a God, he's like a collector who keeps Ant colonies: fun to watch, but largely disinterested in each individual ant's life. They can pray all they want, doesn't necessarily mean that God will smite a rival colony He spent so long building just because one Ant doesn't like his rivals.

Anyway, enough about religion, nobody really knows where we go when we die so any claim of certainty needs to be accompanied by "How do you know this if you've never died yourself?"

82 upvotesStoicCrane3 years ago

In one of the chapters you made the claim that "Women's sexuality is schizophrenic" they seek a man that other women want while actively behaving in a manner to reduce that male's sexual options binding him to her but the moment that happens she'll lose all interest. Couldn't the same be said of our sexual strategy?

We want "decent quality women" but our biological inclination is to spread our seed and play the field. By actively practicing the latter not only is the collective pool of women diminished in value through the CC but women who may have otherwise been "decent" in exposure to an AF becomes transformed into a typical CC slut further decreasing the "quality" of the female pool.

Women are 100% accountable for their behavior. In this context though doesn't it seem like we as Men are adding to the issue?

25 upvotestinder43somes3 years ago

Scenario 1) Female interests are directly self-contradictory

Scenario 2) Male interests result in competition which conflicts with male interests

14 upvotesexit_sandman3 years ago


The first is inherently contradictory, the second is more of a Prisoner's Dilemma.

5 upvotesJani11573 years ago

Could you break this down more? What's the prisoner's dilemma?

7 upvotesdr_warlock3 years ago

Have some self-reliance and Youtube it.

If you still don't see the connection, come back.

56 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

This is seriously one of the most thought provoking comments I've read on this sub for the past year. Very keen observation fellow Shitlord, I applaud you.

I think you're right, both men and women are opposite mirrors to each other in this regard. For example women actively promote betaness in men but are repulsed by it equally. Men promote sluttiness in women but would never think of committing to one.

I think this is both sexes attempt of increasing the 'spread coverage' of their sexual strategy.

The same conflict can be found in men and how they want women to be sluts but protect their own daughter from becoming one. Though I'm confused why most modern day women seem hell bent on creating beta slaves out of their sons.

10 upvotesderektwerd3 years ago

My mother may have done that to me. However, I remember once how she said she raised 5 men and not a set of balls between them. All in relationship at the time. All being betacized (is that a word?). She was basically giving us a hard time for not being men and even called us pussies for not standing up to our wives and girlfriends. Only 1 is still married, the rest broke up or divorced. So I guess you could say she had a point.

2 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

Sounds like your mom atleast had something right, mine tried doing the opposite. But I turned out the opposite due to circumstance from an early age. Much to her displeasure.

3 upvotesderektwerd3 years ago

Yea, and I just read about the promise keeper or whatever. That shit hit hard. My dad cheated on my mum a lot. he had 11 kids total, 5 with my mum and 6 with 5 other women, 4 of which were conceived while they were together.

I only discovered this thread yesterday and my eyes have been opened.

5 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

Sounds like your dad was an untameable alpha.

4 upvotesmummersfarce_is_done3 years ago

Your father has amassed an army.

9 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

Women create betas to set their sons up for their future wife, to be the wife's beta.

Part of why Feminism despite all its other desires doesn't want men raising children, it would take away from women grooming men to be addicted to feminine energy and be predisposed to become good beta husbands.

6 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

Like I said in a later comment, this just proves how self centered women are. They think "all womenkind relates to me and I am the only one that matters" and rationalize from there. While men tell their daughters to be virtuous girls for their own benefit. Men think about the group, women think about themselves.

5 upvotescharacter_ethics3 years ago

Women create betas to set their sons up for their future wife, to be the wife's beta.

Totally disagree.

A women will never give her son to some other random woman. There was too much of investment in raising a son. Mother raises a beta so that she can use him.

1 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

Women create betas to set their sons up for their future wife, to be the wife's beta.

Totally disagree.

A women will never give her son to some other random woman. There was too much of investment in raising a son. Mother raises a beta so that she can use him.

Do they do this consciously? No not necessarily. But by raising him to be her beta she's making him perfect as his future wife's beta.

8 upvotesp3n1x3 years ago

Though I'm confused why most modern day women seem hell bent on creating beta slaves out of their sons.

Many were burned in their past or never learned the pleasure of proper submission. They are trying to raise a unicorn and not understanding the future fallout from teaching a young male that the "white knights" are what women get tingles from.

Where is dad in this equation? Most of the time emasculated and castrated into constantly trying to "please" this angry woman.

Its like a dad giving his daughter "too much" attention believing that is what keeps them from twirling on a pole later. That girl grows up assuming all men owe her that attention.

10 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

Yet you would never see a father promote sexual promiscuity in his daughter, never. While mothers definitely promote betaness in their sons.

The only explanation I can come up with is that men think about the group interest at large, this is a quality a leader has to posses (and all men are leaders). While women are mostly interested in their own interests, which means they don't consider that raising their son Beta would make him unhappy sexually. They only think about how this son can be useful to them.

I've definitely seen this with mothers where they were purposefully cockblocking their son, not giving a shit if he got laid or not.

6 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

Essentially, yeah, women are selfish and still want the control and power their attached sons give them. Heh, my mother still tries to control me through guilt and what not, she hates how little power she has over me.

3 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Not all mothers. A good mother just offers unconditional love, care and support. Her son then grows up to be who he wants to be. Problem is in our modern society gender equality tells women they need to work and have an education, not focus on the more important task of being a devoted mother. Blame feminism for the fact that women do not want to be women any more. Feminism is the enemy of women, children, society and men. It is a blight and there will be a backlash soon.

4 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

Exactly, a good mother should know better and set her son up for success. This is another great example for why single mothers are low value scum.

3 upvotesmummersfarce_is_done3 years ago

Can you elaborate more on mothers purposefully cockblocking their sons?

9 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

Mothers can be jealous that the attention of their son is being stolen by another woman. Remember that women care about commitment so in essence mothers also receive the commitment of their sons.

This holds especially true for single mothers. Them cockblocking you would manifests in forms like banning any female companionship in your house, barging into your room when you're with a girl or otherwise making things purposefully awkward so the girl leaves and the mother is safe again.

13 upvotesStoicCrane3 years ago

I think this is both dexed attempt of increasing the 'spread coverage' of their sexual strategy.

Either this or it can also be a collective way for each respective gender to vet for potential prospects en masse.

When word gets around that a group of AF fratboys made a "rotisserie chicken" out of a certain sorority girl her value in the eyes of men in that college community plummets on account of this. A naïve guy who may have had a oneitis for this chick will figuratively see her in her slutty glory deterring him from pursuing her let alone committing to her thanks to the AF frats.

A woman who wears down an Alpha or creates a legion of orbiters won't hesitate to gossip about her triumph over him/them. By doing so she expresses to women in her circle in wonanese that the man is of low value and hardly worth the time fucking since to them sex is really a bartering service in exchange for something (money, luxury, status, etc). To them if a man is of low value there's nothing to extract from him through sex so there's no point. By bringing Betas and broken Alphas to light they heighten their own sense of value and worth in the eyes of other women because she "took one for the team" and "exposed the charlatans" so others won't waste their time or resources pursuing him/them.

This might be an ingrained bioligical form of gender vetting but our biology has yet to catch up to technology. Post-industrialization where communities were more closely knit and word spread around reputation was everything in the tribe/village. But now all people have to do is pack their bags and move to the next city and they can start fresh.

12 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

Good point, I really think this is part of the reason. My own theory has been that both sexes love the idea of an easy thing. Instant gratification basically.

Us men, we love sluts. No guy will deny this ever. We would happily take all of their sex from them. The same holds true for women, they love betas. They will gladly take their money and time while leading them on, being taken out to expensive dinners.

Both have two things in common, either group likes to take the other sexes currency regardless of how 'low value' this person is. Women have no problem taking time and money from some scrawny geek for as long as he has some. And men have no problem fucking an ugly slut with the lights off. Obviously there are limits.

But the point is that the threshold for what we take is much lower than what we give. Giving away commitment only happens when the guy believes or knows his girl isn't an easy slut. Giving away sex only happens when the girl believes or knows her guy is an Alpha.

But regardless of this both sexes will never turn down a free offer. And essentially that's what Beta's and Slut's represent. They are a free pass to what the other sex ideally wants.

5 upvoteswaytooalf3 years ago

It's just the Oedipus and Electra complex working for whoever is the dominant parent.

My mom raised me to be beta so she wouldn't feel attracted to me. Since TRP I remind her of my Chad dad and it makes her horny (shudder gross).

I think alpha dads do the same thing to their daughters. They raise them to be rational, independant and masculine so they won't remind the dad of their hot mom and feel attracted.

6 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

I haven't been part of this community for so long. But comments like this and the one from OP, is actually why I manage to stay. I get all this about female nature and is beginning to see it more and more in my life, both past relationships and current, heck even in my own mother. But it can sometimes get a bit annoying to read the one sided store about the evil women. Such comments here are great as they force some introspection and paint a broader picture. Because, of course it's not black and white. It's cool to know how women operate, but this knowledge alone is not very useful, if you know nothing about yourself and what's ticking inside of you. And what's causing the entire dynamic between men and women to function.

14 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

It's also the biggest weakness that TRP has. We mostly cover female nature while ignoring male nature. Which means that topics like "Why am I disgusted by my ex-girlfriends slutty past?" never gets discussed.

It also means we never learn what makes ourselves tick. We focus on female nature and male interests while ignoring male nature and female interests. The entire truth is still kept from us because we chose to mostly focus on women. Had we not then we would have learned allot more.

This is one of the reasons why allot of TRP-ers believe that a CC-riding slut is actually having a good time and 'beating' us at our own game. Failing to grasp that women operate different, we ignore what their interests are. If we would then we'd discover most women are very insecure and miserable while riding the CC.

9 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

That's exactly right. I'm totally into all this stuff about females and there are a lot of golddiggers and slutty superficial women out there. I have been treated bad by women a couple of times, but mostly (and I might have been lucky in my selection), I feel I have been treated quite fair. Much of this preaching about "the evil whores" comes from the fact, that guys associate themselves with exactly these sluts and get the AWALT impression. Not to say that not all women can have certain characteristics and can be opportunistic etc., but it varies depending on the type you choose. If you go for the top looking females and go to pick them up in certain environments, you might get the "every mans dream girls" but you can propably set yourself up for the most shit testing and the highest propabillity for her cheating. That should be simple logic for all men who claim to be enlightened. Which some of the guys in here are definetely not according to their paroting of RP theories and their own superficial comments and attacks on even slight disagreements to their own comfortable paradigm regarding their newly discovered RP.

3 upvotesTissueBabies3 years ago

TRP is object and goal oriented. Men fix things. At the end of the day, if we don't know how it works/how to fix the cause, we are much more likely to remedy the symptom. A complete RP solution would focus ourselves more than the mechanics of the sexual market.

2 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

Few people realize this though, all be it in less extreme forms like PUA does.

1 upvotesRobertCarraway3 years ago

We'll get there. TRP has only been around for a few years and already the men here are having this discussion. This is a group of men who don't shy away from responsibility and difficult questions.

3 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

Defining alpha and beta and putting forth the notion of positive masculinity is figuring out how men tick. But, it's less discussed perhaps because it's easier for men to understand and see, as opposed to the convoluted nature of women and their being emotional creatures.

2 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

You are certainly right about that.

1 upvotesSoarinc3 years ago

We want "decent quality women" but our biological inclination is to spread our seed and play the field. By actively practicing the latter not only is the collective pool of women diminished in value through the CC but women who may have otherwise been "decent" in exposure to an AF becomes transformed into a typical CC slut further decreasing the "quality" of the female pool.

This is something I've privately kept to myself because I'd be downvoted to hell for saying it. Luckily this guy said it in a thoughtful, eloquent way so I'm just going to copy/paste it again for reference.

With that said, what happens to a "plate" after you've spun her for 1-2 years? The answer is the following:

  • Her "n count" will increase by 1, and her oxytocin sensitivity will once again be marginally, permanently desensitized further making it even harder to pair-bond in the future which sadly includes her own kids as you've all seen how wonderful single-moms that sluts turn out to be...

  • secondly we've aged her by 1-2 years while we never were going to promote her to a plate-level that she wants. Even if we promote her to primary, exlusive LTR anyone who has ever read the sidebar will know how shitty of a deal that marriage is for men and how divorce only benefits women. The sickest and most depraved example of this is Canada's very own Pear of Anguish: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaC-2lj6HNg

The above link is must-watch for anyone who attributes a modicum of fairness to family law judges and their kangaroo courts of justice...

2 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

With that said, what happens to a "plate" after you've spun her for 1-2 years? The answer is the following: Her "n count" will increase by 1, and her oxytocin sensitivity will once again be marginally, permanently desensitized further making it even harder to pair-bond in the future which sadly includes her own kids as you've all seen how wonderful single-moms that sluts turn out to be...

The thing is that this is the male version of the shit test. If they fail our 'slut-test' and prove a gullible slut we've essentially filtered her out for other Alpha's whom in turn will plate her instead of LTR.

TRP likes to believe that women have it all and don't face difficult tests in life. This belief is faulty and is only held because no one over here is interested in approaching the sexual market from a woman's perspective. Other than finding out how to fuck her.

Women face a real challenge in life that's tied up to their own version of SMV and what level of partners they can attract just like men. But it isn't tied to sex, rather it is tied to commitment and continued male attention.

The sickest and most depraved example of this is Canada's very own Pear of Anguish: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaC-2lj6HNg

That link was just brutal, fucking brutal. I know exactly what that dude is talking about and I've seen women pull shit like this. I'm a firm believer that most women deserve to be treated badly unless they prove themselves.

This level of audacity is just unforgivable and I fully understand why our ancestors used to beat their women.

7 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

You are completely correct. It is not just about women, it is about men. As a man if you can fuck as many hot women as you like, you get bored and settle down (Brad Pitt, Mike Tyson, Johnny Depp). Then from the confines of an exclusive relationship a man gets bored and dreams of wild, hot, young pussy.

For a woman she wants a strong protector. Someone who will produce healthy offspring. When she finds him and locks him down she diminishes his masculinity and therefore her attraction to him drops (this is why dread game works). Alternately she locks down a beta and dreams of Chad the pirate crawling into her bedroom window at night to fuck her brains out. Human relationships and sexuality is a war. At the end of the day you win some battles, lose some, then win or lose the war, but there is always a cost. There is no such thing as perfection.

9 upvotesgisquestions3 years ago


in no way an answer to the simple question posed above

you could, for all intents and purposes, condense a good one to two sentence answer to the question right? or is copypasta more your style?

4 upvotesp3n1x3 years ago

You are asking a question about copy/paste that was answered at the top of this page.

3 upvotesStoicCrane3 years ago

You give him too little credit. My question was too layered to explain with a 5 word sentence. From what I've read in the link thus far it's a notable explanation that acknowledges the apparent contradiction of both strategies.

2 upvotesdocbloodmoney3 years ago

Our biological inclination isn't to spread our seed, it's to ensure we have descendants - 40000 years of evolution in harsh climates means that for white men, that's investing lots of resources to ensure your offspring thrive (not dicking anonymous bimbos and leaving them pregnant to raise shitty kids) (not that I believe any of the bogus stories you incel mystery meat manlets post on reddit anyway)

2 upvotesStoicCrane3 years ago

Just as frogs spawn a load of tadpoles to ensure genetic survival man plays the field by inseminating as many women as possible to yield to at least one strong healthy offspring to carry the family torch even if all others are deficient by contrast.

All living sentient beings are instinctively geared towards survival but the best method for ensuring the survival of offspring is to spread as much seed as possible and let natural selection have her way. If it weren't for modern day Beta government men with 7+ children would be far from uncommon.

I'm no white so the Ra! Ra! White men against the world thing does nothing for me. It's just as bad as the BLM bullshit propaganda in my book. Just here to examine intergender dynamics. The race shit is pointless here.

56 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Rollo, best way to keep frame and deal with dread game when it is reversed? (The girl has many options and often hangs out with guy friends). Thanks!

112 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Niko and I dedicated an entire Red Pill Monthly podcast episode to Frame last month:


If you're concerned about instilling dread in a girl (an extension of frame) like the one you define it's important to really assess what she's really all about first. If she's hanging out with guy-friends to the exception of your own company, it may simply be better to only keep her as a secondary plate you're spinning.

Remember, the Medium is the Message, so what are her behaviors indicative of in this case? Girls who are into you wont confuse you, so if her actions are that she seeks out the company of a lot of guys (to "hang out") that's telling you her hindbrain wants to keep all options on the table with regard to Hypergamy.

So, going to the efforts of instilling dread in her may not be worth your time. However, just by your demoting her to a secondary option you can determine her real interest level. Keep in mind that you should always demonstrate, never explicate, with women. If her IL was never at a stage where your attentions are more valuable than her guy-friends you'll confirm this by performing a takeaway of your attention. If her IL is still significant for you she'll tell you it's bugging her.



17 upvotesiamz3ro3 years ago

My understanding of this is this: You should never be in a situation where you "worry" about this. Just run your normal dread game and if her IL is too low then just let her go. You "worrying" about running dread game on a girl signifies that you're raising her up higher than you should.

16 upvotesGrabHerByThePEPE3 years ago

Any plans to have these podcasts on iTunes? Thanks!

5 upvotesObsidian7433 years ago

Read the blog about intergender friendships.

What do you say about women who claim to simply get along better with men?

1 upvotesTRPInvoker3 years ago

Perhaps this is obvious, but the point that I'm weak on is how to respond when she tells you something is bugging her. How would you respond if she complains that you're not spending enough time with her?

4 upvotesmugsaucecity3 years ago

Would anyone mind to explain dread game to me?

1 upvotesSuperduperCooper233 years ago

The answer is "who cares?". Find a girl that wants you. Keep the other girl as a plate if you want.

13 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

What would be your advice and plan for a hardcase newbie (definition of RSD is virgin, skinny/overweight, no friends, no experience with girls, women or very little and he ended up deep in the friendzone and being emotional tampon...) ?

37 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Learn the foundations of Red Pill awareness first. Fully unplug and kill the inner Beta before you go looking for magic formulas to get your dream girl. There's a process to it and if you skip ahead to parts you're unprepared for you end up like Eliot Rodger did.

3 upvotesmummersfarce_is_done3 years ago

Why don't you increase your SMV? Lift, begin an activity that will boost your testosterone. Lose your fat. You're probably in lethargy. Do something active.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

You're right. But what do i do next?

9 upvotesmummersfarce_is_done3 years ago

Well, before being concerned with the next step focus on your current step. The improvement stage takes time but it is not hard, it is just long.

Developing a toned body helps many things. It fixes your hormone levels and mental strength. It will make you get into the mood a thousand logical advice cannot. It will boost your SMV significantly. It will fix any problems you might have with self-loathing and self-hate. It will boost your confidence as you will have something solid to base it upon. Seriously, this first step is also the most important. But you know that already. Go ahead and do it.

Another advice I would give is to not try to be social with people right now. I mean if an opportunity to talk presents itself, entertain the conversation but don't seek it aggressively. Maybe your bad social experience is what is keeping you in a negative feedback loop. Right now, it is much better to be in the monk mode mentally and feel a slight detachment. At this lowest stage, don't even bother talking to women. You'll only frustrate yourself until you have some SMV to attract them. What matters is whether you are in a negative or positive feedback loop. As long as you are improving your station you will feel motivated. You might feel some comfort and begin to slack off. When that happens remember to keep your discipline to continue, as with it gone you will enter into a negative feedback loop again. stagnation will bring you back into a negative feedback loop remember that. And as always, read whatever material you can find on TRP.

2 upvotesSuperduperCooper233 years ago

I'd start with what you can control without needing anyone else first. Weight loss, lifting, well fitting/stylish clothes. Once you become attractive you'll be able to have far more opportunities to build confidence through positive reinforcement.

2 upvotesAscended_One3 years ago

Also, realize that things take time and that contrary to what TRP teaches you, you don't have to be perfect.

I would actually recommend you to avoid TRP subreddit altogether for a while. Just read the books/sidebar. RSD has some good stuff though.

1 upvoteskez883 years ago

Not Rollo but just get the fuck out there and start doing it. Action is the biggest advantage a man can have. There is literally nothing stopping you from leaving your house right now and going and approaching girls on the street and start talking to them.

There is nothing stopping you from going to the gym, throwing a party, trying to meet up with friends, finding a hobby to meet MORE friends.

There is nothing stopping you from cutting off the women in your life who are using you as an emotional tampon.

Just tell a woman what you want, and go out and be what you want.

50 upvotesFillingInTheSkanks3 years ago

Can you talk about the pendulum swing of the Misandrist movement. Has it reached the tip top and stalled? Tell me I'm in not a bubble, the pushback seems real - it will take some time, but it seems feminism is on its way out.

34 upvotesSpaceTimeinFlux3 years ago

Feminism and the whole socjus machine has begun to bite the hand that feeds, turning on their own and engaging in the same behavior they decry. Average Americans are fed up with it and the hammer will come down sooner than later.

16 upvotesexit_sandman3 years ago

That's the reason why Trump - who, let's be honest, isn't exactly presidential (to put it mildly) - has won the Republican primaries.

1 upvotesel_Technico3 years ago

Trump is a Rockafeller stooge who won the primaries so that Hillary, his dear friend would have an easy opponent and become president.

Always follow the money. Look at how Trump got his and you'll have your answer.

13 upvotesSoarinc3 years ago

Highly agreed -- we are living in an age where stuff can be uploaded to youtube and shared. All the horrible side effects of feminism now easily accumulate and feed the negative feedback loop! Huzzah!

4 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

That thing where they went after Amy Schumer was golden. No one batted an eye when gays in florida were thrown under the bus, but that chubby-middle aged comic hack is in the same demographic as most cat lady SJW...

Shit's hitting home

1 upvotespatrice_plz_come_bac3 years ago

Remember that time ESA Rosetta scientist Dr Matt Taylor got attacked for his shirt? That is when te pendulum stopped moving.

1 upvotespatrice_plz_come_bac3 years ago

Remember that time ESA Rosetta scientist Dr Matt Taylor got attacked for his shirt? That is when te pendulum stopped moving.

22 upvotesClispy3 years ago

General advice for someone who grew up without a father?

37 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

So a bartender I've been gaming just saw me out with another hb9 plate. Will this enhance my status or make her shut down? She texted me saying wow.. And i replied saying "i assumed we were both talking to other ppl, we're both attractive so of course." EDIT: Clapped dem cheekz

156 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

A lot of guys choke in a situation like this thinking that they overdid things with social proof or preselection. This is a Beta self-test actually. The Beta mind will think 'oh well, shit, I guess she's gonna blow me off now because I'm a proven commodity of attraction for girls who're higher SMV that she is".

It's important that you disabuse yourself of that concept. It's part of your Blue Pill conditioning to think that women will only ever consider themselves out of any one man's league. Not so. Women want to be with guys that other men want to be and other women want to fuck.

36 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Thanks Rollo, I've come a really long way in the past 2 years. I knew right away that having another HB9 on my arm would increase my SMV in her eyes. Now its just a waiting game to see the fallout.

12 upvotesp3n1x3 years ago

Go get another 9, hopefully you aren't actually "waiting" on the bartender.

10 upvotesteeelo3 years ago

Shitpost here-

I love your objective analysis and approach Rollo. You're a man that has earned our attention.

40 upvotesItsHillarysTurn3 years ago

First off, excuse the username. This is my troll account. I don't want to comment on my main account.

If she just said "wow..." and nothing else, then you can assume she meant many things. The obvious assumption is, of course, that she meant "wow... how could you do that to me, just be with another girl like that?"

This assumption is just your male hamster running wild. The accurate way to respond would have been (of course hind sight is 20/20) with "Yeah, wow, she was a hot one wasn't she?"

This statement makes it obvious that she (bartender) is not exclusive, and also suggests that she is not as attractive as other girls you pull thereby raising your overall SMV. It also completely trivializes any objections she may have and shows that not even for a second did you consider that the two of you might be exclusive.

By saying what you said, you essentially gave weight to her potential claims that you did something wrong, by defending yourself.

19 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Wow, never thought of it that way. Turns out shes just mad now cuz I walked past her without acknowledging her, told me to make it up to her with which I replied "see you at 9pm then" to.

21 upvotesp3n1x3 years ago

told me to make it up to her

Careful of her meta-frame. This request is from a position of "i'm the leader, you owe me"... You don't owe her shit. "Making it up to her" is a slow blade that cuts deep over time. She should be "making it up to you" for throwing attitude over childish drama... Keep your Frame!

6 upvotesYour_Coke_Dealer3 years ago

I just interpret "make it up to her" as "hey let's fuck". Doesn't matter how some brief meta-frame comment comes off; you're not gonna be seen as a beta when giving her a good dicking

14 upvotesp3n1x3 years ago

All meta frame comments matter. Its their long game and they bank on men being "short term" mentally about it. There is a difference between her desiring his dick, and her controlling when sex happens.

"Make it up to me later" is on her terms. It is the slow progression of "anytime you do something I don't like or disagree with, you will perform an action for me."

Don't be blinded because the action is sex. Its like a heroin addict claiming they are in the leadership role with their drug dealer.

you're not gonna be seen as a beta when giving her a good dicking

You absolutely can be seen this way. Your logic makes it sound like Beta's can't be good in bed. You can throw orgasms around like $1's at a strip club, and still be seen as beta.

5 upvotesiamz3ro3 years ago

Exactly, don't ever justify yourself to women.

5 upvotesSatou43 years ago

My instinct was to respond with something about how hot the girl was. Great, maybe I'm improving.

20 upvotescesarfd3 years ago

She just said wow? Shit test her. - Yeah, it's as if this shirt was made to fit me. or some joke like this.

22 upvotesBitchezbecrayy3 years ago

Whatever became of Roissy? A lot of his earlier stuff (07-10) are some of the best there is out there. I see a lot of you and Roosh, but nothing from Roissy. Are you in touch with him? Any detail would be much appreciated.

53 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Roissy, the individual, is gone. Chateau Heartiste changed ownership around 2009 and it's believed that the posts are primarily written by 3 or 4 guys who shared Roissy's sensibilities. Unfortunately CH isn't what it used to be in the golden age. I still like it, but it's far more driven by political, social and racial ideology now.

2 upvotesred-pill-man3 years ago

He goes by the name "yareally".

4 upvotesBitchezbecrayy3 years ago

Thanks Rollo! Any idea what happened to him? Hard to imagine a damn good writer of his caliber just vanishing into the wind unless outed and destroyed by SJWs and the likes.

48 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

he and pook bought a condo, running game into the sunset

5 upvotesBitchezbecrayy3 years ago

I don't think anybody would have a hard time believing that.

13 upvotesAuvergnat3 years ago

I prefer to think they took a ship to the Undying Lands with Gandalf and the elves.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

That is what I would like to believe. I think it is more likely that they both got fat and married....

5 upvotesMr_Grateful3 years ago

First, thank you for sharing your insights. It has helped me sharpen my knife in life. It's a privilege that my best male friends (Alpha's) allow me to speak directly to their sons in one capacity or another on life and women and they have thanked me as they have seen results. It is a great reward.

I'm a high SMV full-time single Father of a pre-teen daughter. I lead her and she follows and throws out more shit test than any of my plates combined. Keeping frame is the most important priority imo. What would be your priority or second?

10 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Frame for sure, but also to exemplify the man you would want your daughter to marry from a Red Pill aware perspective. You need to be the Alpha to whom she compares all the other men in her life to.

24 upvotesManowaR14883 years ago

What's your take on the Red Pill movie in australia thing.

Also, sign my dick?

43 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I'm not a big fan of the documentary. It was opportunistically titled The Red Pill at the behest of MRAs in order to appropriate a term for which they've always distanced themselves from, but they saw a popular brand.

The movie is only ostensibly about the MRM – it has literally nothing to do with TRP – and is really just a "journey of self-discovery" for its feminist producer Cassie Jaye, exactly as I predicted it would. The MRM will never acknowledge that because they mistakenly believe that any press is good press.

These are the people the MRM would have as the face of TRP: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23vLzYuaDcQ

24 upvotesredpillschool3 years ago

She knew the name would bring controversy as well, thanks namely to our hard work here.

8 upvotesRedEyesBlueShades3 years ago

Fucking. Pathetic.

Seriously. Cringeworthy.

The guy in the video clip, that is. Could not watch that until the end, stopped after a few min.

17 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Hi Rollo,

What advice, if any, would you have for a woman working on herself? I've been following TRP for 6 months and it's done wonders for my relationship, but I find female guidance is extremely lacking.

I've learned how to sew, and am working at initiating sex n a more seductive way. Can you recommend anything else I can do to improve my relationship even more?

43 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Learn to be a complement to a man's life in as conventionally feminine a way as you can. It's a rare woman who cultivates conventional femininity as part of her personality rather than some value-added part of who she is.

8 upvotesHussssy3 years ago

Have a read of the surrendered wife, I try to read it a few times a year so it stays fresh. It's an excellent book for women in relationships. There is also a Red Pill Wives reddit account

3 upvotesyyiiii3 years ago

First Kill All the Marriage Counsellors is the revised and expanded version of Surrendered Wife. Picked it up to take a look, it was fantastic, showed my wife the author speaking on youtube, and she went out and bought herself a copy. Highly recommended.

4 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Learn how some Asian women treat their men. They do 100% of the housework, they are submissive, supportive and feminine. Nothing attracts me to a woman (after beauty) more than someone who legitimately wants to take care of me, wants to see me succeed, and wants me to be happy. A pro tip (I swear I am not being crude here for the sake of being crude), but you gotta give up that ass. A woman who does not give her SO anal is not giving all of herself, and that is disrespectful.

15 upvotestacocobbler3 years ago

What are your most rewarding hobbies/pursuits? Thanks for all you do

57 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago


A lot of people don't know that I'm an artist by trade. Pretty much any creative endeavor I apply myself to is what I find rewarding. That can be anything artistic I do. I draw, I paint, I dabble in sculpting, I'm an accomplished musician and I write a lot more than just TRP material.

I particularly love it when I can mix my business endeavors with my creative gifts. People know I work in marketing and branding in the gaming (gambling) and liquor industries, but what they don't know is that I'm the principle creative behind pretty much everything I do in my profession. I've created over 50 individual products where I've been responsible for the concept all the way thru to production. I design and illustrate every one of them too.

6 upvotesmugsaucecity3 years ago

If it's private no worries, but what do your main business endeavors consist of? How concerned are you with keeping a balance between making money and having enough time to relax?

2 upvotescashcow13 years ago

How do you stay consistent with being an artist?

16 upvotesatlantium653 years ago

Rollo, your post and discussions on sexual fluidity were EXACTLY what happened to my family this year. Dad got sick, mom in mid 40s started dating this younger butch girl and now they live together. She is now "I have a second chance at life to do all the things I never did" This was a big factor in finding red pill.

Will we be seeing this more in our society?

32 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Yes. And it will be reinforced by the feminine-primary push to marginalize and ridicule the importance of men. Men are superfluous in this societal scheme, but masculine dominance and competency is still necessary and attractive.

Solutions: Imbue women with that masculinity.

I believe we're already beginning to see the widespread push of normalizing transgenderism – 95% of which is male to female – will be the next step in making men into women. This is actually an evo-bio phenomenon in populations where it is more advantageous to be female than male or vice versa.

4 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Let me preface this by saying I am not a conspiracy theory guy (I give Neoreactionsafe an ear bashing when he starts with that pseudo religious babble). However it is obvious that men control most of the money and power in the world. Do you think the uber elites and uber rich people in the world give a shit about the feminine primary push, or is it just another amusing distraction to the masses for them? The old world rich men (Cecil Rhodes, Rothchilds) wielded tremendous power yet it appears your modern billionaire (manginas such as Zuckerberg and Bill Gates) will simply be handing off their money to help the third world rather than establishing entrenched dynasties. Do you think the old and the new rich power brokers care about these issues at all? My feeling is the whole movement is just a way for the media to sell product by triggering 50% of the population.

5 upvotesRobertCarraway3 years ago


1) undermines all male hierarchies that compete with the state for power

2) slows population growth through delayed and limited maternity

Tell me, do you really think Gates foundation supports feminism in the third world through pure altruism? If so I've got ocean front property in Arizona I'd like to sell you. They are stabilizing the system. Not only do they care about these issues, they actively fund feminism. Look at one of the following objectives from their website:


The resistance that RP men have to this idea comes from them not wanting to investigate these ideas for themselves and cognitive dissonance caused by the amount of re-wiring they need to do in their own brains.

The Rockefeller Foundation funded the "New Science of Man" as they called it to promote their twin pillars of eugenics and social control. These are their own stated goals. Look again at the two major impacts of feminism that I listed at the top. Coincidence? Foundations like the Gates foundation act in EXACTLY the same way that the Rockefeller foundation has always acted. See The molecular vision of life and read the foundation's own words.

32 upvotesVdangdiggity3 years ago

TheRedPill exists on reddit in which a majority can bend and move subreddits to its will. There are many blue pill comments or low value posts making its way into this subreddit that are gradually gaining more traction. I believe it's the simple fact that there are more blue pill folk out there then there are red pill veterans. If you were to take control of the subreddit, would you make any changes to the way this subreddit is moderated? Or do we need to move on from this and seek out another forum for learning?

42 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

There's always going to be a balance in a large format forum like this to filter the blatant trolling and nonsense from what has actual, teachable value for a guy seeking Red Pill answers. I would not run TRP as I do my own comment threads where everything is unmoderated in the interests of distilling the strength of ideas and countervailing arguments.

I think this is very important, but in a forum of this size you'll just end up playing whack a mole with trolls who have no higher function than to prattle about Blue Pill ego-investments because the Red Pill represents an iconoclastic challenge to their very personalities. Playing whack a mole will only lead to an endless string of verifying proof of concept posts and links for trolls who don't really care about it.

So in the interests of reaching out to the newly unplugged it would serve TRP better to have more involved moderation, but with perhaps a new sub forum that accommodates strictly the backing informational studies and statistics that reinforce Red Pill concepts. As TRM has expanded over the years I'm constantly having to backtrack through what I feel are settled concepts that BP critics think are just my unsubstantiated ideas when in fact they are areas I covered extensively in the past and cited many sources to back them up. Consequently, these BP trolls are always asking to have their hands held to find the links because they're too intellectually lazy to do it themselves.

12 upvotesnathanbrisk3 years ago

Do you have any plans of ditching the pseudonym?

15 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

No, but I will likely be a bit more public than I have been when the 3rd book drops.

2 upvotesblackhawks933 years ago

What's the third book about?

11 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

The Rational Male – Preventive Medicine when will this be on Audible?

16 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Almost done actually. Sam Botta is finishing the reading this month. I don't want to coincide that release with my 3rd book's so it'll likely be within the next month and a half

11 upvotesGatmanz3 years ago

Is the character (bad guy) in 'L.A Confidential' based on you?

22 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I adopted Rollo Tomassi from LA Confidential as my monicker because it was appropriate for a guy who was getting away with his crimes (telling Red Pill truths).

32 upvotesredpillschool3 years ago

Hey Rollo, thanks for stopping by. What's your opinion of the involvement of sexual politics/blue pill conditioning in this presidential race. Are we experiencing a large scale representation of the feminine imperative/ war on men?

60 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I made the prediction last year that this election would be the first to be decided based on the Red Pill concepts that the 'sphere has been hashing out for 14+ years. I was not disappointed.

As I mentioned above, a Hillary presidency will be the most polarizing force in gender relations that western society has ever known.

32 upvotesblackchadthundercock3 years ago

Are we experiencing a large scale representation of the feminine imperative/ war on men?

Yes. Obamas boss (wife) was just on tv today saying that this isn't about democrats & republicans anymore, it's about what type of country were going to leave behind for our children.

As we all know, women communicate indirectly and what Michelle really means is that they want a society based on feelings, not facts therefore making the feminine imparative's reach even worse. Just based on the fact that Michelle's main mission is to spread western feminism across the glove with her "teach all girls" initiative proves me right.

1 upvotesToSeeAndToHear3 years ago

To be fair the main reason for "teach all the girls" is that economies fare better when all their population is educated/productive. It's been discussed before.

The secondary effect is more feminism, but most countries that don't educate women are not in danger of going full SJW any time soon.

1 upvotesblackchadthundercock3 years ago

economies fare better when all their population is educated/productive.

Please. You don't fool me....

The same thing was told to American women at the start of the feminist movement in the 60s. Reality, the gov't is now able to tax the other half of the population that was previously doing tax free work that benefited the family unit & not the gov't directly. And as a result, women are twice as unhappy as they've ever been. Now that's been discussed all over the net.

Gov't can't have women doing something that benefits that patriarch of the home instead of the elite.......

2 upvotesToSeeAndToHear3 years ago

Because being a housewife has been hard work since modern appliances... right.

Women are unhappier because men are feminized, and because real work is harder than the bullshit work they evolved for - gathering roots and berries while chatting with other women was always easier than hunting.

Doesn't change the fact that educating your whole populace gets you out of poverty faster.

28 upvotesAnEndlessDream3 years ago

Rollo, what direction do you want to see TRP take these next few years? What do you think should be the ultimate goal within the community? Thank you.

6 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

The ultimate goal should be truth, success and being virtuous. This brings humans in a state of being content.

Read up on Spartan society, which was very much the example Rome cherry picked and many other civilizations since then. Including our own. They knew the natural laws.

4 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

[permanently deleted]

12 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I've done a modified Max OT routine for going on 6 years now. I also do HIIT cardio on my off days. I do a lot of active stuff too; I fence Saber & Epeé, I kayak and I snowmobile in the winter. I think as you get older form becomes more important. The injuries I get these days aren't from lifting heavy, but rather getting the weight of the rack to do a set. I always end up pulling something when I'm pulling off or re-racking weight.

I've got a post in the works about Deep Conversion coming soon.

When I do drink I tend to drink neat, so I like a good Gin. When I'm in Holland I always make a point to take a bottle of Jenever home with me.

1 upvotesLionlocker3 years ago

When in my country Holland, do you partake in cannabis consumption? What are your thoughts on the matter?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Heheh, no, I gave up on herb back in my early 20's when I realized it was just slowing me down.

4 upvotesredpilljunior3 years ago

Hey Rollo, I'm a huge fan. You, Pook, IM, BlackDragonBlog & early roissy are my top 5 manosphere writers.

Anyways, I see that you said you're an accomplished musician/artist. I'm a young guy, 17. I'm a junior in high school and I love singing and want to be a musician/vocalist/artist when I'm older. I want to make tons of money and make it big in the music industry. I know how hard this is and that music is a type of "Either make it big or your efforts aren't fruitful" industry. I have a pop/r&b oriented voice but I love all music. Music is what brings me joy in this life and I intend on putting all of my effort into making it (which I know I can do, I just don't think it'll be easy).

What advice can you give me?

11 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

If you want to actually make money in music, get into the recording and mastering side of things. The industry is a shell of what it used to be. No one develops bands anymore and the only way a band can actually make money is by touring relentlessly and merchandise these days. It's not like it was back in my day.

I have respect for kids doing it now, but they never had to face the kinds of challenges we did in the late 80s early 90s. Today you can record and mix everything on an iMac that we had to pay for multiple studio session to do back then.

2 upvotesredpilljunior3 years ago

Thank you so much. I plan on learning how to mix and master, and etc. I'm going to save up to buy my own equipment.

Do you have any advice on the actual singing,marketing & exposure/getting signed areas of the field?

2 upvotesFurrowBeard3 years ago

Hi, Music Technology major here. PM me and I would be happy to discuss with you some routes you can take for exposure and success.

1 upvotesfingerthemoon3 years ago

Image is almost as important as the music. Get jacked and ripped, develop a costume/persona and make your music visual or theatrical. Street perform, if you can't make $200-$300 a day you're doing it wrong. Learn to live out of a van/bus/rv. Do nothing but write/record/perform/workout and you just might make enough to get by and keep doing what you love. Probably won't get rich but you'll have more fun than most people even dream of. And there will be plenty of women, watch out, that's the biggest trap, with drug addiction a close second. Don't ever put your music on the back-burner for a woman, you could lose both and it could take years to build your momentum back. I made that mistake, lost everything and it almost killed me. But the up side is the depth, grit and strength that comes from suffering, losing everything and building it back again.

2 upvotesredpilljunior3 years ago

Thank you so much. And I will never put my music on the backburner for anyone, much less a woman. Women are temporary, my love for music is eternal lol.

And i will work on everything else. My job, my money, my body, my grades and my music are my only priorities. Also, check your PM.

1 upvotesfingerthemoon3 years ago

More advice: it's not how talented you are that determines success, it's how much you want it. Also, people say don't put all your eggs in one basket, but if there's a plan B, plan A never happens. Making it as a musician is one of the most difficult paths you could choose, but the rewards are greater. Just give it your all and you will succeed.

5 upvotespokerkid893 years ago

I have read both books and just wanted to say Thank you Rollo!

5 upvotesscarletspider33 years ago

Really appreciate your work Rollo. You probably saved untold numbers of guys from all kinds of bull-shit. Just wondering if we can get any hints on the theme of your next book?

9 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Well, it's tentatively titled The Rational Male – The Red Pill, though I may change this.

Almost a full third of the book is dedicated to Red Pill parenting, but I'm focusing on observations and applications for Red Pill aware men (or making them more aware as the case may be). I think the term "The Red Pill" is becoming bastardized to serve personal agendas of ideologies who've appropriated it because it has some gravity to it. As such, my intent is to provide a clearer overview of how TRP came about and what it really represents to men socially and personally.

10 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

lately people seem to have calmed down about TRP, with respect to that, how do you see TRP evolving over the next few years?

also which is faster your greyhounds or your skidoo

40 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I believe if Hillary gets elected you'll see a groundswell of men seeking out the community and I really think we need to be prepared for it. Hillary's presidency will be the most polarizing force in gender relations western society has ever known. You will have the extreme elements of the Feminine Imperative at war with the Red Pill aware mindset.

You will literally see human casualties as a result of a Matriarchy and the naivette of egalitarianism's influences. We need to prepare ourselves for this inevitability.

4 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

What do you mean calmed down?

5 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

as in i've seen it mentioned less outside of TRP

15 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Missed the chance last time:

You asked on Twitter how would you open a table of girls all on smartphones. How would you?

What's your thoughts on the treatment of greyhounds In spain, especially after hunting season

Do you prefer skidoo, bombardier, or the Japanese brands?

Also, you never talk about your wife, but you Made it through raising kids without an incident as best I can tell. How much of her was about quality vetting, and how much was proper 'bitch management' as humansockpuppet would call it?

27 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

When I posted that pic I was petitioning PUAs, I'll leave that up to them to decide.

Spain is one of the most deplorable countries for Greyhound racing. Their treatment is inhumane and I've read that they sell the dogs to China for food sometimes. I'm not anti-racing, but I am for strict regulation in breeding and training.

Skidoo and Bombardier are jet ski brands, not snowmobiles. I own a Yamaha 800 in-line 3, 155 long track and I'm considering buying a new Arctic Cat this year.

I wish I could say vetting from a Red Pill perspective had anything to do with it, but my wife and I have always been on the same team with regard to raising Bebé Tomassi. I would say 10% vetting and 90% Red Pill aware management, but really it's not management since my reflexive responses default to Red Pill reactions.

6 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Ouch on the skidoo. Interesting on the wife. Cheerd

3 upvotes450k_crackparty3 years ago

Lol what? Skidoo is most definitely a snowmobile brand. The name is practically a synonym for snowmobile (like kleenex, saran wrap). Not only that, but Bombardier aka BRP is the producer of the Skidoo brand.

The man is an RP legend, but if you don't know that Skidoo makes fucking skidoos....

edit: maybe I missed the joke that he thinks Bombardier makes shitty sleds.

1 upvotesMKG243 years ago

Dude, he was being sarcastic. I have a Summit that would run circles around his 800.

2 upvotes450k_crackparty3 years ago

Yeah I made an edit after I posted that. Has to be it. Just seemed like an awkward way to make that joke since they're the same brand.

12 upvotesrugged_vanity3 years ago

I have to say your work has been incredibly influential to my life, and I can't think of anyone I've learnt more from.

I just finished my law degree, and am currently preparing to write the bar. I'm tall, handsome (get approached often), and know my smv is only going up. Had a bpd ex who led me down the rabbit hole to your work, which helped me thoroughly enjoy the single life for awhile since then.

On the current good problem I'm having. I've met a girl who is wonderful. Highly educated, likely going to make a bit more money than me, we get along great on a somewhat dorky level. We've been dating for around a month, she made me wait a few weeks before having sex, and by all counts she's a high quality woman with a low n-count that I'm convinced isn't fabricated.

My problem is that I can feel myself becoming more beta as time goes on. While in law school I fucked a lot of girls who were drawn to my more narcissistic traits. This girl seems more interested in my potential as a long term mate, and honestly I feel the same way about her. Since hanging out I've been curbing my more assholish tendency, but the inner nicer guy is coming through.

As you say, if a girl makes you wait for sex the sex is never worth it. While it was fine, it doesn't compare well to the girls who fucked me with much greater urgency on the first night (or the bpd ex obviously).

I know I could go fuck a few random girls to make myself like this girl less, but I guess there's a part of me that wants to try being monogamous for a bit to see if it's something I can do. Do you have any advice on how I should avoid slipping into more BP tendencies once I stop fucking other girls?

33 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Keep this one as a plate and get back in the field. If you're backsliding into a Beta mindset in only a month with this girl that's a bad sign. Furthermore, if sex was just OK, this isn't a good omen either.

Your SMV is high now, but consider what it will be when you're a lawyer at 36 years old. Would you rather be able to explore your options then, or take the lack luster girl you have now?

11 upvotesAuvergnat3 years ago

You haven't entirely killed the beta, and the almost-unicorn you found is resurrecting it.

If you are red pill aware, Im sure you know what will happen to her career, her libido, and her submissiveness once she got your commitment locked in.. you cannot afford to become optionless

1 upvotesAuvergnat3 years ago

You haven't entirely killed the beta, and the almost-unicorn you found is resurrecting it.

If you are red pill aware, Im sure you know what will happen to her career, her libido, and her submissiveness once she got your commitment locked in.. you cannot afford to become optionless

12 upvotesblue_dover3 years ago

What is your view on us having to hide our RP identities? My RP awareness has become a very integral and core part of who i am as a man now. But i can never talk about these things openly - I have even stopped talking about relationships and women overall because of the backlash that i may face.

I know you have written about keeping ur identity private out of fear of SJW backlash to your daughter. Apart from GLO and you i don't think there is anyone who is so open about their RP awareness.

I am not sure how to articulate my question properly. But what i am trying to get at is what would a world look like where we knew each other by our names. Where we knew who Rollo and Archwinger really are?

Ps. Thank you for all your ur hard work. You have changed my life. I hope we can have a drink one day, on me.

46 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Well, if Hillary gets elected I expect copies of The Rational Male will be read in secret by candlelight by groups of men like the Bible in communist China.

Hard to say, but I think men ought to understand that it's an indictment of a feminine-primary social order that feminists like Jessica Valenti can write self-conflicting feminist agit-prop for the Guardian and make a good living while men fear for their jobs and livelihood for posting Red Pill comments or Tweets online.

I will likely be a bit more public with my persona after the 3rd book drops, but even still, it's impossible to shake the stigma of "misogyny" no matter how successful a Red Pill author you are. The mainstream loves an easily hate-able villain and nothing is more satisfying than a straight man who plays into the misogynist narrative.

16 upvotesdr_warlock3 years ago

1) It's easy, just shut the fuck up. Act dumb about your knowledge and keep good vibes to blend in. You'd be amazed how little people care for content as opposed just 'being cool' and laid back. Vibe > Content.


People have this need to be percieved as 'enlightened'. Get over it. It's just mental masturbation. TRP (the sub) is just one manifestation of enlightenment. It could be about the Federal Reserve, the truth's about slavery, or politics, something truth related. Redpill truth is heavy. Heavy = unpleasant. People that argue buzz topics aren't looking to come to a collective truth, they're just seeking an emotional buzz within blue pill boundaries (no red pill).

I have a group from this sub that I meet with here and there, and I don't even talk about anything 'red pill'. People have gone all week doing the 9-5 and commuting. When they hang out, they just wanna have fun and chill. Forming a group with TRP sub vetting process just puts the mind at ease knowing everyone around you is of the same mindset and don't have to censor yourself if TRP is appropriate to discuss. Outside that, the whole 'discussing philosophy and TRP theory in a room'-fantasy is bullshit. Keep that shit to yourself and have fun.

2) Be financially independent via self-employment so that you can't be fired by HR. On top of that, don't mix your identity with the business and only speak to management. Delegate the interactions with the lessers to management so that you don't get SJW hordes making slander and protest campaigns online and at your front door.

Most of all, no matter what happens, always hold frame. Even when you're outed. Never apologize. Never explain yourself. It will only make matters worse. Humans instinctively despise weakness and will double down on their tactics just because they smell it on you.

3) If you do browse the manosphere in public, make sure nobody is within eye shot of your screen. Most people don't care if others can see what they're doing on their phone because they're engaging in activity acceptable by the blue pill i.e. facebook and fantasy football. Anything manosphere related is a no-no. Have a password on your phone too.

4) Did I mention shut the fuck up? I promise, if you feel there's a window of opportunity to slip in some 'enlightenment' you get a textbook bluepill regurgitation and backlash. I tried many times in the past, especially when I was a newb here. Don't even bother. Read the material and interact online for your intellectual fix, then move on by ACTING the red pill and shut up.

1 upvotestruthseeker2013 years ago

I think you guys are a bit too paranoid. It's how you word things that makes red pill ideas seem scientific vs sexist. When you talk to people and explain to them the evolutionary or psychological reasoning behind a woman's behavior, it does not sound as hateful. You're company has to be pretty pathetic to fire you for having an intellectual convo on the differences between the two sexes.

1 upvotesfingerthemoon3 years ago

People continue to astound me with just how stupid, judgmental and closed-minded they are. I found evo psych before trp and was talking about the science with a lot of people before I got smart and shut my trap.

1 upvotesfingerthemoon3 years ago

I have a friend that I've tried to help numerous times with women. Shared theory and even pointed to trp. I told him in confidence and asked him not to ever mention to anyone that I read this stuff... He continues to be a lazy dumbass and I suspect he told a mutual friend who called me out in front of a couple other friends when I was debating my bros girlfriend about men and women. He tried to say I sounded like an MRA and that it was poison on the mind. I asked what MRA was, and then said I got my information from reading evo psych. They all wrote me off as being bitter towards women because my ex left me... Lesson learned - don't talk about this shit. You might be tempted like I was to help a buddy, just be aware that it can turn and bite you.

11 upvotesAlligatorNicoli3 years ago

Rollo, have you ever had a psychedelic experience? There's emergent neuroscience research in the last decade demonstrating the efficacy of substances like psilocybin (found in magic mushrooms) and LSD ("acid") to facilitate profound change in an individual's personality (i.e. increased openness, novelty-seeking). Looking back I realize that my unplugging was concurrent with when I first began using psychedelics, 2-3 years ago, after stumbling onto The Rationale Male. Could psychedelics be a useful tool in helping other men unplug (especially the hard-cases)?

32 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Yes. When I was 19-20 I dropped acid and I've done mushrooms too. I get that LSD and ayahusca are reality "widening" experiences, and I understand they can be useful, but I can't really endorse using drugs now.

I was in no way unplugged when I did them in my youth, but I don't doubt the possible aid they might be for some guys. That said, and this is coming from a veteran of the liquor industry, I think men need to learn to Game and come to the Red Pill without the use of alcohol or drugs. Too many guys use booze as a buffer against rejection, or they're only 'on' when they get a buzz on.

3 upvoteswtfawdNoWeddingShoes3 years ago

I can second your personal experience. I spent a few years doing a lot of drugs (MDMA and LSD primarily) and some of the experiences/insights they left me with made it very clear that things were not as they should be. I've scaled way back now, but the realizations and insights I had have not changed. I ended a LTR that was going to fail eventually and focused on myself.

The effect psychadelic experiences have on users have a lot to do with where they are in their lives, they types of literature they're consuming, and what their personal philosophy is at the time, imo. I was deep into neuroscience and evolutionary psychology/biology and those things combined led me to TRP and I feel it all tied together so perfectly that I couldn't find a single fault in it. I have since benefitted greatly from internalizing many RP truths and seeing the world as it is, and understanding core concepts such as AWALT and the fact that TRP isn't about PUA or Game, it's about giving men the tools they need to be real men, and real men don't need PUA or game (for the most part) because they radiate power, authority, and decisiveness.

Add onto that attractiveness and confidence, and you can have all the pussy you want... if you want it. It's all a fucking game, and the rules are so fucked, and there are so many different rule-sets, TRP gets rid of all the superfluous rulesets that are purely societal constructs and focuses on the evolutionary biology/psychology aspects that we all operate on at our most primal levels.

2 upvotesiamz3ro3 years ago

I'm a MASSIVE fan of LSD. I usually take it when I go clubbing. I notice that I get a lot more primal, more "in the moment" and more self accepting, which fuels my interactions with women. I quite often get approached by girls when dancing and needless to say my game become a lot smoother. And that's not even addressing the spiritual side of the drug.

4 upvotesreddestlurker3 years ago

Rollo, thanks for your invaluable input into the collective body of knowledge we call TRP. I have read your previous responses to the marriage question, to marry or not to marry? To my redpill brothers living in the western world, I understand its a big NO. However, I am Kenyan and over here its a fault divorce system. Even though Divorce rates are steadily climbing as the feminist wave steadily hits these shores, I personally don't know a divorcee yet. That's no reason to celebrate though, marriages over here take a huge toll on men. The betaization process by women who don't see a way out of marriage can be quite vicious. I'm 25, just finished a STEM degree, with a 30+ notch count that includes married women (this opened my eyes more than anything) and i'd like your perspective. Would you advise me to get married?

7 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

No. You're still 10 years out from your peak SMV. Why marry (really at all) when you'll be in a better position of selection at 35?

Establish yourself and your base worth now while you're single and unencumbered with the responsibilities of marriage or kids and you'll be in a far better position in a decade, with a firm understanding of your SMV to women.

1 upvotesreddestlurker3 years ago

Thanks Rollo. Much appreciated

11 upvotesuhhthelonious3 years ago

Any advice on how to avoid triggering "buyer's remorse"? For example: a woman regretting sexual/emotional interaction after the fact; saying she "should've have never gotten invloved", etc. once she sees you are not going to commit to her...

For the record, I have a tendency to act more serious with women than I intend to because I like to take them on lengthy, couple-like dates; even though they're just plates.

31 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Your over-investment in these women is likely the source of their buyer's remorse. You need to learn the concept of bread crumbs and allowing a woman to want to invest in you.


5 upvotesChiptehubah3 years ago

This is what I needed.

Ive had it all so far but I have loose lips. Breadcrumbs. Ive got to remind myself that Im leading them on and not trying to be their friend.

9 upvotesKIZAN3 years ago

I've havent actually read the book (planning to) but the price is really good. Also, Is there an online version?

5 upvotesfingerthemoon3 years ago

I just bought the Kindle version and it comes with the audible for only $1.99. About $11 total, cheaper than just the Audible with was $17.99 (iirc). They have a cool sync as well.

We'll worth it and exactly what I've been looking for, something to listen to in the car before a date to help me maintain my frame.

9 upvotesCardioPumps3 years ago

Most important tips to a know-it-all & "I'm gonna be a big deal" type of 18 year old?

Love your work and gifted it a few times to friends. Keep being great.

24 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Know that you 'know' nothing and be open to mentoring, apprenticeship and instruction in all aspects of life.

9 upvotesdr_warlock3 years ago

It's important to note that you shouldn't disregard wisdom just because the guy is bluepill or beta. The puzzle pieces of life are scattered among the population. Use people for what they're good for by customizing your interaction with them based on their vibe, then move on. People really need to get over this 100% uber alpha-redpill 24/7 fantasy.

2 upvotesTestiklease3 years ago

I didn't figure this out until I was 24. Real info here

6 upvotesBlackJ13 years ago

What's up Rollo, I've got a question on the relevance of MGTOW when it comes to the manosphere in general. Do you believe it's possible for a man to self-actualize in the absence of women and even sex?

16 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

No. If what you mean by self-actualize is based on Maslow's hierarchy, no.

They'll disagree of course, but in my estimate a full life experience entails interacting with women (GFs, mothers, sisters, co-workers, etc.) and having actual sex with an actual woman.


8 upvotes_the_shape_3 years ago

How satisfied are you with the direction of the manosphere at large from day 1 to where we are now? What are your thoughts on more writers taking up the fight and spreading the message even further?

32 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

God, I wish there were more Red Pill writers. When I read there was going to be a documentary film about 'The Red Pill' I was thinking, "hmm, no one contacted me for an interview" nor was Roosh consulted or any of the very few Red Pill writers of note. Later I find it's the MRM and they're appropriating TRP for a doc about them.

But in that minute I realized that there are really precious few heavy hitters in the 'sphere that really write RP material. That's not to say there aren't some great writers in the 'sphere, just that most stick to isolated niches, PUA, MGTOW, MRAs, TRP, but all from very specific perspectives.

I don't read Roosh very much since he's really exited the manosphere to reinvent himself as an alt-right pundit. But he used to be someone I'd read daily. Same with Heartiste. I feel like I'm the last of the three 'R's of the manosphere who's still doing what he does.

I expect that after this election is over you'll see a lot of these guys sudden't rediscover the 'sphere. I've always felt that TRP needs to be apolitical, areligious, amoral and not linked to any social agenda, because when you associate TRP with any of that it takes on the characteristics of those influences. Then TRP becomes meaningless. That's why I have such a problem with this documentary slapping TRP on its title – it is in no way representative of TRP, but now it's got the stink of the MRM on it.

And they're not the only ones, the alt-right adopt TRP to mean anything they consider truth. Be that as it may, both of them just debase what so many men have put together as TRP for so very long.

3 upvoteshaxurmind3 years ago

I've always felt that TRP needs to be apolitical, areligious, amoral and not linked to any social agenda

Given feminism's links to everything else, anything that stands to counter feminism (the manosphere included) is bound to appear in equal measure as an opposing force wherever feminism appears.

Even the mantra of TRP, 'enjoy the decline', stands counter to feminism as it teaches men to put themselves first instead of burning ourselves out to serve others.

3 upvoteswtfawdNoWeddingShoes3 years ago

I know I'm a bit late to the party, but I've been following this subreddit closely for the past 3 years. About a year prior to cutting off my LTR (partly due to adopting many of the things here led to that, which I have no regrets about) I really started to change my ways. I read everything in the sidebar, "No More Mr. Nice Guy" was a real wake-up call for me, and I'd love to delve into some of the earlier stuff.

I know you are one of the more influential members of the early movement, and that it started as PUA stuff (and that MRA stuff is like the retarded step-child of TRP) and has evolved into the high quality TRP type stuff we see here today, though sadly the quality has dropped in the past few years since this sub has gained greater popularity.

Other than your books, Might is Right, stuff by GLO, (I just added Practical Female Psychology: For the Practical Man and Why Men Are the Way They Are to my reading list,) what would you suggest I dig into in order to get a more... grounded and historically relevant view on how the "manosphere" ended up where it is now.

I'm fascinated in the historical/anthropological perspective on TRP and how it came to be. It's clear by many different metrics the reasons it is the way it is. I understand it is not MRA, it is not PUA, it is a philosophy and toolbox for men on how to be men in today's world. I plan on taking up writing, and this topic is one of my passions, and would love to contribute in some way. I would love to hear from you, I really respect your opinion and the major role you've played in making this community what it is today.

Thanks in advance!

2 upvotesstickfiguresk3 years ago

I've always felt that TRP needs to be apolitical, areligious, amoral and not linked to any social agenda

But doesn't TRP philosophy line up extremely well with libertarianism? Like an instruction manual to becoming Ayn Ran's wet dream? Amoral, I can agree with. Areligious: there's probably a western culture argument there.

As much as it seems counter intuitive, I don't think it can be both apolitical AND amoral/"not linked to any social agenda." I know I'm not the only one that got much more conservative after discovering TRP. Not looking to install any legislation is still a political stance.

1 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

If you take Rand seriously you haven't read enough philosophy.

3 upvotesstickfiguresk3 years ago

Rand's works are her ode to hypergamy. If you can't take that seriously, you haven't read enough TRP.

2 upvotesSetConsumes3 years ago

Rand's works are her ode to hypergamy.

Lol, you're spot on.

But as an actual philosophy? It's shit. You can't combine Aristotle and Nietzsche and expect it to be coherent. The statement itself hurts to think about.

2 upvotesAlexIsOnFire113 years ago

Of the three 'R's, your body of work has definitely been the most useful because of its objective and realistic perspective. When reading other blogs, there's a lot of political/religious links in the material being taught. Your work has none of that and is why I will always consider your work to be truth. Fuck the rest of the manosphere, they all change with the social tide and are thus meaningless. TRM will always be a pillar of uncompromised truth and insight.

3 upvotesAuvergnat3 years ago

Mystery method and book of pook. As much as some people hate on PUA, the early 00's game material laid on the groundwork of what would become the red pill

1 upvotesLarParWar3 years ago

What about Jim?

9 upvotesEn-Zu3 years ago

Is it possible to be RP without having the pick up artist mentality/drive?

I ask because I find I actually find it a lot more satisfying to sate my sex drive with a low-key but still sorta monogamous relationship and I wonder if not caring about pua and "game" is adversely affecting me.

15 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Absolutely. In fact, I daresay that most RP guys are RP 'aware' but never really put that awareness into practice.

Beware that you don't get caught up trying to fulfill Blue Pill idealistic goals with Red Pill awareness though.


2 upvotesEn-Zu3 years ago

What would fulfilling blue pill idealistic goals with red pill awareness even look like?

12 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Purple pill. Pursuing your oneitis with "RP tactics". Self improvement for the sake of women and not for yourself.

Some claim pursuing marriage even while RP aware but shit I want kids and I dont want them to be raised by a single mother. I plan to take the harder path because I want to raise red pilled men and women who will be solid foundations of future society. Some men have to do it, but those that do tread a fine line between red and purple (and perhaps even blue...).

4 upvotesgrowingstronk3 years ago

Searching for the happy ever after as a main goal while using red pill principles to get it

3 upvotesteeelo3 years ago

Rollo, how old were you approximately when you began this passion for writing?

Can you type out one of your blog posts in a few hours?

5 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I've always loved story telling since I was about 12, but I wouldn't say it was a compulsion until I got into writing in college, a LOT. Honestly, my old SoSuave posts, my blog and the books are really an extension of the compulsive writing habit I developed back then. My mind wont let me not write now, so I keep a notebook with me all the time so I don't forget ideas as they come to me.

Depends on the post. Sometimes I get a really clear idea and grind away at it. Those are posts that take 1-1.5 hours. Then there are posts in my drafts folder that sit there for months until I get some new insight about the topic and I craft the essay of a period of time. Most of my longer, more involved essays are like this.

3 upvotesawayofthought3 years ago

What do you have to say about the cluster-fuck that is called college in America? How many more mens' futures need to be fucked up in false sexual assault claims before America wakes up? So far this school year, two of my friends have been claimed as rapist and kicked off campus.

8 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

What's going to happen is that the campus culture will become so hostile and so strewn with risks that only feminized men and 'progressive' women will populate major universities. Free speech is already stifled at most, but you'll notice that that speech is only countervailing ideological thought to what's approved and comfortable to those institutions.

Campus culture is for women, by women young men entering these universities ought to have a required course that educates them on the risks they subject themselves to by attending a college, much less uttering a dissenting argument about the prevalent ideology in a class.

3 upvotesReasonFreak3 years ago

Hi Rollo, huge fan, you're my favorite manosphere writer.

I was just wondering if you have any thoughts as to the roots of the SJW phenomenon and if you see them getting bigger or smaller in the coming years and decades?

My take is that they're a kind of grand alliance of the SMP's biggest losers. Mainly ugly women, weak men, and non heterosexuals who feel entitled to more options. Personally, I believe the spheres of society that are dominated by SJW's today (Old Media, Universities) will still be dominated by them in the future but that those spheres of society will shrink in relevance with regards to the rest of society.


9 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Here's a secret, everyone is a social justice warrior. The only difference is what one considers "justice".

Justice to me is a society that respects conventional masculinity and evolved complementary sex roles. One that recognizes, respects and celebrates the innate differences between binary genders instead of delusions of transgenderism. I could go on, but you get the idea.

TRP is a form of social education and I think most RP aware men will at some point advocate for it or try to unplug other men. Is that not a form of activism?

I'm fully onboard with resisting the pop-culture undercurrent of what we call SJW's, but it's their ideology that I disagree with. Once the pendulum swings back towards conventional masculinity, nationalism or what have you, that's when we need to be careful of how we employ the same weapons that SJWs are only too happy to use now on ourselves.

3 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Hello Rollo, How do you maintain a frequent sex life when you've been married a long time ?

Most of the married men I know tend to seem like they never get sex and only a select few claim to get it almost everyday but I'm a sceptic.

Maintaining SMV is of course key, but what do you do if she starts swatting your hands away and saying "no" or getting an excuse when you go for it more times than her submitting to you. Is it simply a loss of attraction? The great Patrice would say "let a bitch know you have options" but if you're doing everything by the book and you're noticing she's slowly tapering off wanting your cock and starts duty fucking you less and less frequently.

Attraction cannot be negotiated, talking to her about it would be pointless and only temporarily work, if that all. Besides "upping the dread" or pitching her and getting it elsewhere, what would you recommend

I really hope you see this, I've wanted to ask you this for a long time. Love your work, thank you for everything you've done for myself and the community

7 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I'm sort of in a unique position with regards to my Game in marriage. Due to my talents and my career I've always enjoyed a high degree of social proof and preselection well into my marriage. That combined with my staying in shape and my covertly requiring Mrs. T to stay in good shape also helps.

I only use passive forms of dread and most times even I'm not aware I'm using it. It's a natural extension of my personality and the social company I keep.

I have sex with my wife as often as I want, but when you get into this kind of intersexual dynamic, it becomes less of a concern for me. I don't focus on how many times I'me getting laid in a week like most married guys. I don't have quotas for my wife, in fact I'd rather have 2-3 really intense sex sessions with her than 7-8 lackluster duty sex sessions. Guys who keep quotas defeat any passive dread that would organically inspire their wives to fuck them more freely.

3 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

What is your opinion about female promiscuity and how it could correlate between a males beta mindset. A.k.a. Sluts and Betas are the same. One gives away time freely, the other gives away sex freely. Their respective sexual currency. And so both are examples of low value. Men don't commit to sluts, Women don't have sex with betas.

I've not seen you cover any of this in your past articles, yet it would explain allot of dynamics. For example, when a man breaks frame and proves himself a beta- the woman is disgusted. When a woman slips up and turns out to be a slut- the man is disgusted.

Both end up in loss of attraction for the opposing sex. Is this the missing link the Manosphere has been ignoring all this time?

5 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Every man wants a slut, he just wants her to be HIS slut. https://therationalmale.com/2012/01/06/the-slut-paradox/

You'd be surprised by how many men commit to sluts. In 2016 it's almost an impossibility not to. The problem with your equation here is that in a feminine-primary social order the slut is generally forgiven while the Beta is universally punished by order of degrees.

1 upvotesPantsonFire12343 years ago

I've read that article but I have to disagree. Men don't knowingly commit to sluts (most men that is). No man ever has watched porn and uttered "That girl is so hot, I want to marry her". Men love personal sluts, not village whores.

I do agree that in 2016 it's almost impossible to not end up with one, then again the same holds true for women. How many true Alpha men do you know? Most women will end up with Betas alike.

The problem with your equation here is that in a feminine-primary social order the slut is generally forgiven while the Beta is universally punished by order of degrees.

Doesn't that constitute a social issue rather than sexual dynamic problem? Sluts are women and in our society women are to be 'revered' which includes the slut. This however doesn't change the way men feel about sluts. There's a definite consideration going on in the male hind-brain whenever he meets a new girl, based on promiscuity. If this wasn't the case men wouldn't fret so much about N-counts and virginity wouldn't hold the status it did back in the old days.

7 upvotessqerl3 years ago

First off, thank you. Your books are entertaining, insightful, and have improved my life. I'm very grateful for your work.

Second, I know a young man (16) that reminds me of myself at that age. I gave him Rational Male, and told him to reach out anytime with questions. Do you have any age appropriate tips I would share?

17 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

TRM book 3 will have a substantial portion of it devoted to Red Pill parenting, but one primary thing you can do is serve as an example to him.

Again. demonstrate, do not explicate. Don't get together with the express purpose of talking about Red Pill things, but rather plan something to do together where you might be able to talk as a byproduct of whatever project you're doing together.

Women talk, men do.

16 upvotesMr_Grateful3 years ago

I take my daughter on adventures from a simple cycle ride to an unkown area. I will randomly stop and say, alright take us home, and watch as fear comes over her but she tries, then I speed past her and say follow me (I may not know exactly myself but I have good direction, but won't tell her IDK).

I'll take her to the ocean and say watch me ride this wave, it's perfect. Thinking I have left her behind, I see her riding next to me.

Last weekend I took her on a ride that was a 150' swing. I asked is your heart racing? Yes it is. Good, so is mine and grinned.

My philosophy is show her what the kind of man I want her to be with. I am the bar. Hope she can do even better.

She may disappointment me in the future and I will accept I did my best and still live my life as I see best. I'm not sure, but she might be the only women in the future that I white knight. Depends on circumstances.

4 upvotessetzer_3 years ago

I like this... I always thought I'd raise an absolute badass son but somewhat clueless on how to raise a daughter. Thanks for the post.

3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

You're going to like my new book, all I'm saying.

6 upvotesIncredulous_Ed3 years ago

Hi Rollo, just want to say thank you for everything you do - I was fortunate enough to discover your writing when I was 19, and I can't tell you how grateful I am that it wasn't any later than that. It's kind of interesting - I see an LCSW through my healthcare provider every month and he's a big fan of yours. In fact, he said I'm the only person he's met in real life who knew about the red pill/manosphere.

Recently you've written about the feminization of the western church, and being an active church go-er, I've seen a lot of it first hand - which of course, makes me a bit skeptical about taking relationship advice from some of these folks.

I can't really see myself in a relationship with a non christian, just due to differing wold views. There aren't many young women in the church scene where I'm at, so where does that leave me in the meantime? Casually date outside my religious views? Or just self imposed celibacy? What am I missing out on by not dating? Thank you again for your time.

22 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Just know that you're deliberately limiting your experience with women by choosing to date within a specific belief parameter. We all do this to an extent, but in the case of men in the church, and the blatantly open feminization of it, this makes for a cohort of men given to rationalizing their dating or sexless conditions to religious reasonings that are corrupted by a feminine-primary influence.

In your case I would be careful of how you let this affect your maturity and the development of your Game and social skill sets. Most religious guys I know are very self-righteously Beta and their social skill set never develops past what their youth pastors (Betas themselves) have told them Godly Chicks dig.

Be careful that you don't get lost in the Quest for the Righteous Fox. She doesn't exist:


1 upvotesKyfhoMyoba3 years ago

Remember that a woman will take the shape of her container. IOW, work on your Frame. Ivanka Trump converted to Judaism for Jared Kushner.

9 upvotesImPerToo3 years ago

Hi Rollo, One question I posted to askTRP, and I'd also like to hear your opinion: Is it worthwhile to act ignorant/dumber than I am in my career/relationships/friendships?

56 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Law 21 Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker – Seem Dumber than your Mark

No one likes feeling stupider than the next persons. The trick, is to make your victims feel smart – and not just smart, but smarter than you are. Once convinced of this, they will never suspect that you may have ulterior motives.

It's certainly applicable when you're determining the motivation of others.

2 upvotesImPerToo3 years ago

I have yet to read that book but I will be on to it asap. Thanks Rollo

9 upvotesManowaR14883 years ago

Law 21

1 upvotesImPerToo3 years ago

I'll read that book after I'm done with rational male. Halfway through it. Thanks bud

4 upvotesMotiMorphosys3 years ago

Good afternoon, Rollo! Do you think that hypergamy and feminism are primarily the result of cultures glamorizing sexuality? And, how do you think the average man would act if the tables were turned and he had the sexual options that the average woman has? Thanks for your work, keep it up!

25 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Hypergamy is the result of biological and evolved motivators, not a social outcome. Feminism is a social adaptation with the latent purpose of optimizing Hypergamy for the greatest number of women possible while diminishing all male influence in the process of their optimizing it.

Culture didn't create sex. Sexuality is glamorized because it serves an evolutionary imperative. Evolution doesn't care about glamor, it only cares that you're having sex.

Look at the ubiquitousness of free online porn and you'll understand what men would do if the tables were switched.

5 upvotesHangisLife3 years ago

TRP has given us the ability to see how transient emotions are and why we shouldn't base any important decisions on short term emotions. How do you short-circuit negative thinking? For instance, that immense feeling of negativity that succumbs you after the girl that you've been flirting with all night starts making out with a random, or the project you've been working is falling apart.

Bonus if possible: Giving up alcohol, especially when going out. Any advice?

4 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Remove yourself from that negative environment and focus on activities that produce a positive dopamine effect. Work out, listen/play music, do something creative, review your past successes, etc. Then get back in the Game when you're in a better frame of mind.

Giving up alcohol: Good idea, and that's coming from a guy in the industry. I always tell guys they need to be less domain dependent when it comes to Game. Alcohol is a big element of that domain dependency. You need to be able to capitalize on Game opportunities is a variety of environments, but if all you ever associate socializing with girls with is in a club with a drink in hand you're limiting you capacity to calibrate, adapt and improvise.


4 upvotes_PowerBull3 years ago

How did you or what made you swallow your red pill?

19 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Three things. The first was reading Dr. Warren Farrell's book "Why Men Are The Way They Are". I read this in the early 90s when there was no Red Pill or manosphere and it was a wilderness of fempowerment coming from all sides.

This book opened my eyes to a lot of the mechanics of intersexual relations. It's kind of a shame now, because Farrell is really a very Blue Pill egalitarian in the same vein as MRAs, but at the time it awoke me to what I was involved in.

Second was the experience I had with my BPD girlfriend and learning just how persona-altering it was once I was free of her.

Third was my education in behavioral psychology and connecting a lot of dots with regard to how intersexual relations we're really a calculated series of operant conditioning techniques that women instinctually used with men.

2 upvotestrppr3 years ago

Is evolutionary psychology the foundational psychological theory underpinning your writing?

If so, how would you use it to explain the feminine imperative?

The reason I am asking is because your use of the feminine imperative in your 2nd book (and your blog) seems to accord more with a collective female psyche a la Jung. Furthermore, I also see certain mainstream psychoanalytic concepts, primarily the 'subconscious' being used without any connection to evolutionary psychology. How would you connect the two?


P.S. Please get an editor for your next book so I can recommend it to more people :)

8 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Evo-Psych is a very important discipline that informs a lot of my own and many other writers works, whether they acknowledge it or not. I also use quite a bit of behavioral psych and evo-bio in my work too.

I coined the term Feminine Imperative because I felt there needed to be a more comprehensive term with regard to the feminine influence as a gestalt whole in society, in evo-bio motives, in psyche and in intersexual dynamism. So in a way, yes, the FI would account for Jung's psyche, but in 2016 we have far more evidence of the biological and sociological influences of the feminine.

To many guys want to just simplify the bad aspects of the FI and call it feminism, but there's so much more to it than that. Feminism is an ideological extension of the FI, one that wields more and more power, but it's still founded on serving the interests of the FI.

It's funny how evo-psych is used in the mainstream these days. Usually it's cited as evidence of a concept or else it's some fem-blogger looking to use an isolated study as click-bait. I do my best to consider the entirety of evo-psych but a lot of critics discount evo-psych mostly because it confirms a lot their own misgivings. Evo-psych always seem deterministic and if you know anything about the non-sexual applications of evo-psych you know that's not so. It's when you consider evo-psych in intersexual terms with winners and losers that it gets personal for them.

2 upvotestrppr3 years ago

Agreed it's a great term!

Would be interested in a blog post fleshing out the connection between biology, psychology, and the FI.

2 upvotesdr_warlock3 years ago

People's avoidance of evo-psyche is caused by us personifying human-beings too greatly. It's self-pedastooling that prevents accurate assessment. We are just talking animals traversing a concrete jungle dressed in silkworm ass-byproduct. We are animals that do everything we can to ignore and sugar coat our true primal motives (sex) so that others (the masses) will cooperate in civilization. It is becoming our demise.

2 upvotesLaRedPill3 years ago

Are you planning to translate the books? (to spanish for example) I started my blog in spanish exactly because there are almost no real resources for men in my language. And I would love to have your book, translated, to my kin and friends.

3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

You know, I've been looking into other translations recently, but I'm focused on book 3 now. It'll be a definite priority in 2017.

1 upvotesexit_sandman3 years ago

You already got translators?

1 upvotesadam-l3 years ago

Book 1 definitely deserves a revisited edition, one that would turn it from an organized collection of essays into a more structured book. If you are looking into publishing translations, which are a great deal of work on themselves, that kind of work would be of double benefit. I guess you have three options, 1) re-write it yourself, 2) work with a good professional editor, 3) work with someone from the manosphere in a semi-professional arrangement.

1 upvotes_teleno3 years ago

As a Spanish mate, I'd like to read it

1 upvotesLaRedPill3 years ago

My blog? www.laredpill.com

2 upvotesM3K33L3 years ago

What is your opinion of a high schooler unplugging? Do you find that to be good, in the sense of a head start? What are some things I could do to practice game and general TRP things without running too much risk of isolating myself within the school?

6 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

This is a good forum for a high school guy unplugging questions: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index.php?forums/high-school-forum.16/

2 upvotesSickOfIt5183 years ago

Can you write a book specifically for marriage game? I own TRM already.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Hi Rollo. 😊

Have you had any pets that were not greyhounds?

4 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Oh yeah, I had an english pit and a Chowbrador.

2 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

Rollo, I've actually emailed you privately, however, you did not answer to my last email. I'm struggling to get over a bad oneitis ex who seems to tick a few of the BPD boxes. It's been six months, I've fucked hotter girls than her, but I still think of her, still miss her, hell I dream of her. Is there anything else I can do, nothing else is working. Is there anyway to get her back since I cannot take this anymore.

7 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

No. And as I told you, never root through garbage once you drag it to the curb. https://therationalmale.com/2011/09/08/rooting-through-garbage/

3 upvotesKyfhoMyoba3 years ago

Do. Not. Put. Your. Dick. In. Crazy.

Even if you did once before, before you knew it was crazy. Don't repeat the mistake.

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

I miss her so much man, I want her back so much, she isn't crazy, she just isn't, I became bluepill.

2 upvotesZombie_GiveMeBrain3 years ago

Hi Rollo I'm currently writing a college senior research essay on marriage laws in the united states. Part of the research includes interviewing 2 people relevant to the topic. I was wondering if in the near future you were willing to answer some questions I'd have prepared? Cheers and thanks for your contribution to TRP

1 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Oh for sure, follow me on Twitter and hit me up. I'll DM you.

2 upvotesOu-tis3 years ago

Hi Rollo, since I think your book is a fundamental in awareness, is it possible to translate in other languages?How can I contact you to discuss the thing?

1 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Leave me an email addressHit me up on Twitter, I'll DM you.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Can i skype you , i would like to talk you for a few minutes. Thx my skype: live:frincu_daiurs

copy everything from ,,live:frincu_darius " Thx ,wish you the best.

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I am doing one on one consults again so yes.

If anyone else is interested I'd be happy to talk to you. I do charge for my time, but it's a pay-what-you-want arrangement. Leave me a message on my About comment thread and I'll set something up with you:


1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

just also wrote on your blog.

2 upvotescorsega3 years ago

Does your wife know about your blog? Does she agree with what you write?

4 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Of course.

For the most part she agrees, but I enjoy it when she doesn't because then I get to test my ideas against her own preconceptions. She does read certain posts that I think are good and I link her.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

How have you been able to align your daughter with redpill acceptance? How have you been able to prevent her from taking too much stock in her own opinions and from being overly ambitious, in a masculine sense? You've mentioned previously that you're allowing her to go to college, presumably to attain a career. How can we teach our daughters that while they have a special role in life, that they are not the equal of their husbands and that their ideas and goals do require vetting from a man in authority over them? How can we gift them the autonomy of a career and then yank the rug out and mandate their submission and relegation to the home at the behest of their husbands? Game can only elicit submission in the bedroom. Outside of the bedroom, and particularly with highly educated girls they are staunch egalitarians to everyone's disadvantage. Is it crueler to let our daughters get a taste of flying when we just have to clip their wings after marriage?


Just to add to that I'm sure your daughter inherited a sizeable IQ as that is a heritable trait from the father. You know that leading evo psych research points that the more intelligent a girl is there is an exponential decrease in her desire to procreate. For every 10 pts above average intellect, her interests in womb fruit plummet 15%. This dysgenic trend is sadly rooted in feminism and careerism. They aint faking it when they claim to lust after achievement. The situation is unfortunately untenable. It sucks to have to limit someone's self determination but Men will only sire their heirs with submissive women and highly intellectually gifted girls are stridently egalitarian. When left to their own devices, they won't breed because they truly do not want to be obedient and submit. What's the game plan for yielding future generations that have a modicum of intelligence if we don't hobble the ambitions of quantifiably intelligent girls?

4 upvotesDio_Brando_Joestar3 years ago

What is the ultimate best way to improve Game when it comes to talking to chicks ?

44 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago


People always consider me the go-to guy for theory and understanding what's under the hood with regard to why certain Game techniques and concepts work, but I can't stress enough the necessity of getting out in the field and putting it into trial and error experimentation.

You have to go out and get punched in the face, go back home, recalibrate and practice again. Most guys believe that Game is all about numbers and just spamming approaches night after night, but I believe Game is more about persistence.

Go out and do one approach a week for a year. You'll have done 52 approaches in that time, but 52 approaches is more than most men will do in their entire lives. Let that sink in. You don't go to the gym once a week and pound out set after set and expect to gain anything. Persistence is what pays off, so you go to the gym 4-5 days a week and focus on particular areas and you make a habit of it.

2 upvotes78Shaun783 years ago

So how did you get into snowmobile? Was it just a geographical thing, like,"Hey I live by snow so why not?" Or was it something you grew up doing?

3 upvotesMax_Flair3 years ago

Would you welcome the idea of a contraceptive for men? Apart from the obvious plastics of course.

3 upvotesExpectations13 years ago

Do you believe women care whether you are kind or not? OR does are women essentially indifferent to it?

6 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Agreeableness and humility in men has been associated with a negative predictor of sex partners: http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0029265

From an Alpha Fucks perspective I would say no, but from a parental investment perspective I'm sure 'kindness' counts for something.

1 upvotesExpectations13 years ago

I see, i guess as long as its a kindness women feel has been earned and not just being a doormat, it would be okay in this way.

5 upvotesnicolasgroux3 years ago

I'm 23 years old and have been out of work for 9 months because I was sick. I'm starting to get back to normal now. What's your advise to get the most out of the experience?

15 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Self-assessment and honest insight would be where I'd start. At 23 I'd be asking myself what it was I really wanted to do since it appears you're recreating yourself from a base point.


3 upvotesDonMefistofele3 years ago

Hey Rollo,

Read your book. Been unplugged long before then. Fully aware of SMV and book was really great re-enforcement of lots of ideas. My Q: 25, prospects for future are great. Been with 80+ women. Dated plenty. Have gf I'd like to marry. I see no red flags, and we're both on same page in terms of big picture wants/needs and have same understanding of contract of monogamy/marriage. My rule of thumb about "wifing up" is that the pros would have to outweigh the cons. They do, quite a bit. So-how do you know when marriage is the right choice? (Would sign pre-nup, already been discussed) I by no means have one-itis (a concept long banished from my brain) but of all the ones I know, could sketch up, have "known", she wins. I want to marry her and go build a kickass life with her. What would you do?/what advice could you give?

I'd really appreciate your insight. I love your work and have great respect for your intellect, and as a married man, desire your perspective even more.

31 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Marriage is never the 'right' choice for a man. Unfortunately the institution of marriage has become so debased and so much of a liability for men that I cannot advise men to marry even the 'ideal' girl right now.

That's really hard for me to type these days because I want to believe that a Red Pill aware man should marry a woman who's on the same page as he is and start a family and pass on his Red Pill awareness to sons and daughters for the sake of repairing our corrupted society. In the 'sphere there's a constant beat about how men ought to save society by standing up to our SJW world and marry a complementary woman who would make a great Red Pill wife.

Unfortunately, every legislation, every consent law, every legal and financial liability about marriage is a no-win situation for a man. Any guy getting married today Red Pill or not is assuming extraordinary risk for very little upside. And it's only getting worse as feminism, social justice and the Feminine Imperative works its way into mainstream religion (the last refuge of marriage).

Watch this documentary and then ask yourself if marriage is the 'right' choice:


4 upvotesDonMefistofele3 years ago

Thank you, Rollo. Vows will do in the meantime. That's what counts anyways, IMO. No need to increase govt power anymore than it already it is.

10 upvotesFuknmods3 years ago

The tl;dr to marriage is simple:

  1. The only wife material girl is the one who will stay despite knowing you will never marry her. That said, never marry her.
  2. Seriously just live together forever or until you cant stand each other. Contact a lawyer about ways to avoid a common law marriage from happening (i.e. in MA, a provision states that you need to want to marry her in order for common law to kick in)
  3. Get a lawyer to hash out legal regarding child support and custody in the case that you two will split.

Thats it. You get all the benefits (except the tax discount) and minimize the risks of divorce. Added dread for her knowing youre still legally single so you cheating means no payout for her in divorce, no getting fat or you leave, no withholding sex or you leave.

2 upvoteslozboss3 years ago

OP making out that he's Captain RedPill superhero then going on about Marriage and building a life together in some sort of bullsh*t Bluepill fantasy.

Smh. Hopefully these responses have woken you up bro.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago
  • How do I get over the fear of approaching girls even at parties? I drink and still feel nervous

  • When going from Beta to Alpha, is it possible for people who knew my past self to accept that change if I pass their shit-tests?

3 upvotesjames_the_dean3 years ago

The second question is what I would like to know also. How do you handle when your long-time friends question your new direction. Mocking is also on the table when I try to explain self-improvement.

10 upvotes_the_shape_3 years ago

How do you handle when your long-time friends question your new direction. Mocking is also on the table when I try to explain self-improvement.

"Are you asking me so that you can mock me?"

It's very unfortunate, sometimes even sad, but sometimes you have to begin parting ways with people who at the very least cannot keep on the sidelines about the direction you are taking in life (nevermind outright supporting you).

A lot of people may support an intense, self-improvement driven life in theory, but will try to knock it down when they see it in person ("this guy doesn't drink! lol", "this guy reads these economics books after working his 9-5 - the fuck?!? lol" etc.) Don't let it weigh you down ("shit, they can't handle my lifestyle - maybe I should take up smoking again?") If they can't stomach it, too bad - you have one life and it's a very short one at that.

2 upvotesjames_the_dean3 years ago

It's very unfortunate, sometimes even sad, but sometimes you have to begin parting ways with people who at the very least cannot keep on the sidelines about the direction you are taking in life (nevermind outright supporting you).

You might be right about that one. I always had this answer on the back of my mind and even though some materials cover this topic here I felt like my friends are an exeption and I'm overblowing things. Kind of like oneitis with friends lol ( 9+ years )

Taking your advice on this.

8 upvotesSkorchZang3 years ago

Everyone will try to drag you back into that crab bucket as usual, but if that doesn't work & doesn't seem to phase you whatsoever, then it will be accepted as the new normal.

Women especially, they readily accept a man's "transformation". If your social status changes (or appears to have changed) the way they treat you changes too. It goes the opposite way with equal ease, if you used to be the top alpha in college but then kinda "lost it" in a long relationship, the girls who you thought would swoon over you forever will quickly be onto it and not give you the time of day now.

5 upvotesdr_warlock3 years ago

Ghost 'em. They were from chapter one. Now it's time to move on to chapter 2.

but don't burn bridges though.

2 upvotesblackhawks933 years ago

You don't. You get new friends. Make them feel threatened that you may leave them then show yourself. People are a lot more accepting if they are afraid.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

What's the best way in your experience, to awaken someone to this way of life?

18 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Living by example.

Allowing them to come to you about it.

Being sensitive to when the right moment (usually a moment of trauma for them) is to relate uncomfortable truths and then be sure to account for the anger and nihilism that will initially be a part of their unplugging.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

What is your article that does not deal directly with sexual strategy that you think all of your readers should read?

11 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

A New Hope


It's in Preventive Medicine too. I hate to have newly unplugged guys tell me how hopeless they think life is after they've become RP aware. I address this here.

1 upvotesWilldaddy3 years ago

Out of curiosity, what do you look like?

11 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I constantly have people tell me I'm a dead ringer for Brett Favre.

22 upvotesWilldaddy3 years ago

Followup question: Are you actually Brett Favre?

1 upvotesKyfhoMyoba3 years ago

Brett Favre ain't anywhere near that smart.

2 upvoteskafka-tamura3 years ago

Rollo, do you think exercising the option of hookers is a buffer? Lets say you do, would you agree there is a point at which the risk vs reward would outweigh traditional dating. Like lets say 10% of your paycheck in a city where hooking up is relatively difficult.

2 upvotescasper413 years ago

What is your stance on facial hair and grooming? Many women claim a beard is an automatic 'no' for them.

17 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Heheh, well, consider this from an evolutionary perspective – growing a beard is something a man can do that a woman cannot.

In our feminine-primary world a woman's "automatic 'no'" should speak volumes about how we prioritize the importance of not just our personal grooming, but everything else. From an evo/bio standpoint facial hair is a physical cue of testosterone and one that also implies male maturity (you've got to be a 'man' to grow a beard). Thus, the mental impression is one of unique maleness and maturity.

It's fascinating that a full beard is an automatic no for women, yet studies indicate that a guy with stubble or a 5 o'clock shadow is "sexy". Go figure.

Be that what it is, a man wearing a beard has a couple of liabilities attached. The first is that a beard signifies male maturity, but that comes at a cost of cultivating a youthful appearance. I think if a guy is going to grow a beard he really needs to own that look and not dress in a way that makes his perception incongruous with what that beard signifies.

Second, feminists and manginas hate beards because it's a visual representation of conventional masculinity. I remember reading article after article by feminists and masculinity-confused men a few years back decrying how 'fake' men were for wearing a beard. The ridicule made these hipster men out to be gay lumberjacks, but what's telling was just how much vitriol they had for men's beards. Not the men themselves, but what impression a beard gave them about the 'type of guy' who proudly grows one.

Beards are offensive to this set because they represent an old school masculine appeal which they believe is sexist or oppressive. With that in mind, by all means grow a beard. I don't have a beard myself, but when I lived in Orlando I started wearing a chin strap beard. The look was popular with the Puerto Ricans I used to have cut my hair and I liked it so, what the hell right?

I still have a chin strap but I can't believe how much grief I get for it after moving back to Nevada. But IDGAF.

4 upvoteswhatsthisgarg3 years ago

In our feminine-primary world a woman's "automatic 'no'" should speak volumes about how we prioritize the importance of not just our personal grooming, but everything else.

I'm in a particular sub-culture where beard and mustache styles vary greatly, but are always studly. My wife isn't really identified with this sub-culture.

She likes the skin, so every winter when I grow it out, she says eww, that's what you're doing? Then every summer when it gets warm I ask her if I should shave it off, she says no. Women.

1 upvoteslqtys3 years ago

I don't know in the USA, but in Europe, or at least, in Spain, beards are a fashion trend since a year ago or two. Everybody has now a beard.

4 upvotesteeelo3 years ago

Many Women demand a good beard too.

1 upvotestallwheel3 years ago

Those same women will get wet for good looking guys with stubble. Don't do a lumberjack beard unless you're sure you can own it. You really can't go wrong with well-groomed stubble these days.

1 upvotescashcow13 years ago

How do we save Western Civilization?

20 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

From the bottom up, one man at a time.

1 upvotescashcow13 years ago

Do you have anything more specific? Any specific strategies, methods, ideas?

I realize I'm asking too much. But I have to ask.

1 upvotesIndustrialEngineer3 years ago

Hey Rollo. After an almost 5-year, mostly shitty, mostly blue-pilled relationship, I am not at all looking for any sort of commitment. I'm 28 and have a 4-year-old daughter with my ex, whom we split time with equally; never married, and we actually co-parent well. I read The Rational Male more or less right after the breakup and I'm glad I did; it has really changed my life. So thanks for that.

Do you think I should bring up the fact that I have a kid early on in an interaction with a woman (or before the interaction, e.g. by having a pic of us together in my Tinder/Bumble profile), or not at all? Since I'm only looking for hookups I really don't think it's relevant at all but I want to avoid the potentially awkward situation in which I get a woman home and then she finds out and is scared off by it or something.

Thanks for taking the time to respond.

14 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

No. For the simple reason that discovering who you are as a man is something women crave. The more a challenge you are, the more an enigma and mystery you are the more women engage. Nothing is more satisfying for a woman that when she believes she's figured you out using her mythical feminine intuition.

Do not deny her this pleasurable fantasy. Keep your cards held tight to your chest and allow her to discover you have a daughter only as a reward for her behavior and continued interest. In fact, a woman discovering you're a parent is a rare treat for her if she has designs on you having parental investment potential. It feeds the fantasy and the fact that to were protective about revealing it makes it all the more tantilizing.

1 upvoteshaxurmind3 years ago

A woman's challenge is to make a man shed his personality (commitment).

A mans challenge is to make a woman shed her clothes (sex).

1 upvotesBattle-Scars3 years ago

Thank you for posting. The Rational Male made all the difference to me when I first started my journey of improvement as a Man. Are you working on a new book?

6 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Yes, it's in the second round of edits now. It's getting to be more comprehensive than I'd originally intended too, so as I edit I come up with more material.

Writing a book for me is like a living thing. It evolves and tells me what it wants to be as I'm writing it.

1 upvotesManowaR14883 years ago

Is it an extension of the rational male series, or something a bit different?

1 upvotesnathanbrisk3 years ago

Has the search of higher (spiritual) truth affected your direction or understanding in red pill studies and a red pill life? If so, how?

6 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I do recognize that humans have a need for spiritual connection as part of what makes us 'us'. I see a lot of the practicality in many spiritual pursuits and social dictums that were inspired by Red Pill truths as well. In fact, much of the spiritual answers we seek are to questions that the Red Pill makes difficult to accept.

1 upvotesbeAn0n3 years ago

Rollo, could you expand or put into other words the whole "women want men to just get it." Is just "getting it" understanding they're not creatures from space, but humans, and testing is both a male and female function to see what type of person you are...


6 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

There's a post for that: https://therationalmale.com/2012/08/22/just-get-it/

1 upvotesverify_account3 years ago

Why did the narrator of your audio book incorrectly pronounce the word hypergamy? I loved the book but such an obvious mistake was difficult to listen to.

1 upvotesteeelo3 years ago

I'm curious, could you spell it phonetically? Like how they were pronouncing it?

1 upvotesHypnot0ad3 years ago

I always read it as hyper-game-ee, but then I heard a friend pronounce it hi-per-gum-ee which makes more sense. Rhymes with polygamy.

3 upvotesteeelo3 years ago

Yes correct, the second way is best.

Tomato, tomato I suppose.

Hypergamy is prounced similar to 'Hermione' from Harry Potter!

1 upvotesStoicCrane3 years ago

Rollo, bought both of your books the past few months which were an absolutely refreshing to read especially in paperback. When do you intent to release a third?

6 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Soon. I'm aiming for late November to mid December.

3 upvotesTomFoo3 years ago

Red Pill's own Santa Claus bearing gifts.

1 upvotesGetrichonIMP3 years ago

Hey Rolo, what is your preferred method of attracting females?

6 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

When I was younger, and even now as an adult, I was always very comfortable with implied social proof and preselection. I have a natural default for this even today when I'm at an on-premise promo, but as I'm older now I've found that Amused Mastery combined with social proof/preselection is catnip for young and older women. It's all about calibration from that point.

1 upvotesGetrichonIMP3 years ago

I really enjoyed The Rational male, it read like the ultimate conclusion of "The Game" Keep up the great work and thanks for giving us your time!

1 upvotesbitigchi3 years ago

Where can I buy your books in e-book format outside US?

7 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Depends on your country, but honestly, look on EBay for a used copy if you're having trouble going with Amazon.

1 upvotessharkfinnsoup3 years ago

Thanks for all you've done for me, my sons, other men and the odd woman (be it temporarily). There used to be a site "A Dark Heart", that I used to read along with you and with the other 2 Rs. How can one re-read some of the essays? PS. The 3Rs and the Private Man have made me laugh a lot. Cheers Gentlemen!

1 upvotesSMGPthrowaway3 years ago

Did you ever speak to Shark from SMGP, the blog running from 2009-2011ish?

If so, what did you think of him and his teachings?

He woke me up when he was active. I avidly read all of his posts and felt like they were gold. Just wondering if you had any thoughts.

1 upvotesLumby3 years ago

From a risk versus rewards perspective - what's your opinion about using a legally bound surrogate mother to start a family as a single male?

Would you recommend this approach for someone who wants to continue their lineage?

1 upvotessonder_one3 years ago

Two questions about what I perceive to be contradictions in common Red Pill conversation:

First, how do we balance outcome independence with having goals and purpose? I'm supposed to persevere towards my goal, but not care if I lose it?

Second, how do we balance social proof and preselection with the idea that we don't want women to use us as girlfriends/orbiters?

1 upvotesFulp_Piction3 years ago

Hey Rollo,

I'm recently re-reading your year one posts after leaving an LTR and realising how I'm basically back at square one. While I managed the relationship well for the most part, oneitis creeped in and I grew attached to the relationship I had 'built'.

I'm finding internalising the material difficult this time around, I comprehend it but it's hard for me to apply what I read. Can you point me in a good direction? I'm also interested in social circle game, if you have any post recommendations for that?


1 upvotesJayHerman3 years ago

Hello Rollo, I'm new here. I've lurked this subreddit on-and-off for half a year or so now. From what I understand, you are one of the few individuals in this sphere who is able to maintain a "traditional" marriage/long-term-relationship.

What is you advice to find women compatible with this goal? If you want to link some of your articles on the subject, I'd be game to read them.

3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

First off, I never use my marriage as some kind of metric for what guys can achieve themselves. My career, my talents, my personality and my grasp of Red Pill awareness, Game and psychology are unique to me.

My marriage is an anomaly in today's world. That said, you might read this:


1 upvotestehredsea3 years ago

Hi Rollo,

What signs do you suggest I look for to figure out whether I am a rebound for a girl, a friend suggested this is the situation I'm in, but I am the one who initiated any interaction beyond the activity we have in common. For reference, the girl and I are in the same social circle. She had been with the same guy since high school and recently 10yrs later they are divorcing. When i first met her i was attracted to her but kept my distance. I am positive she has very low N-count, if not only her ex-hus. What do you think?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

If you're the first guy she's been with after a 10 year marriage, you're the rebound guy regardless of signs. What you need to be more concerned with is her ex's Alpha impact on her (is she an Alpha Widow or was his going Beta what split them up?) and are you her Plan B. If you've been waiting in the wings for 10 years, the answer is likely yes.


1 upvotestehredsea3 years ago

I see what you mean. I definitely have not been waiting for her, I've known her for 3 years, but we were never close aside from our shared activity. Her ex was definitely not alpha from having known him. I haven't orbited in any capacity and never made or let myself be a backup. It's only until two months ago that I decided to make a move. She even admitted to me she thought she annoyed me when she was in my bed. I myself have been Rp aware for a little over a year and my main motivation is to smash not ltr. But because I'm still working on my frame, I'm trying not catch feelings.I appreciate the honesty.

Does this change your opinion?

1 upvotesDookiestain_LaFlair3 years ago

Did you get your name from L.A. Confidential? Cause that was a great movie.

1 upvotesluckylosing3 years ago

Rollo, there have been recent posts made regarding imposter syndrome. I am able to keep it at bay for the most part recently, but it still rears its head sometimes. From your experience, is this something that I can realistically expect to grow out of in time?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Personality is always malleable.


1 upvotesBat_man923 years ago

Big fan of yours ,Rollo.What are the books that you would recommend to a 24 year old guy?

4 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Mastery 48 Laws of Power The Red Queen Art of Seduction Why Men Are The Way They Are A Billion Wicked Thoughts

1 upvotesKrunjar3 years ago

What would you say are your top 5 skills/attributes for attracting women, and top 5 for keeping them interested/attracted? (so for example in the first top 5 you might put looks high up but maybe something else is more important in the 2nd top 5)

3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago
  1. Amused Mastery
  2. Social Proof/Preselection
  3. Creating an emotionally associative impression
  4. Looks
  5. Creating challenge and mystery
3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago
  1. Maintaining an emotionally associative impression
  2. Creating 'Deep Conversion'
  3. Emotional distance and unpredictability
  4. Social Proof/Preselection
  5. Passive Dread
1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

What is the pinnacle of man?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I'll tell you when I meet him.

1 upvotesSoarinc3 years ago

You've helped a countless number of guys and you've done more good to help your mankind than the average doctor or honest politician. That said -- do you ever feel obligated to continue being helpful or do you have some type of mental barriers that you can easily close and simply free up all that time and switch it to a more typical hobby that is equally time consuming such as building sterling engines or making an underground bunker?

I've always been fearful of commitment to being a good person because I've been there, done that, and you feel so bad about disappointing people that think so highly of you.

1 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Oh Lord, I probably dedicate too much time to my career and business endeavors these days. I wish I had more time for hobbies between writing TRM and trying to stay current with my work projects.

I definitely have mental barriers though. Most of them revolve around something selfishly creative for me. I do my best thinking when I'm wrapped up in some art project I'm doing. That and when I take my sled out and get to the top of some mountain.

I write what I do because I think it's necessary. I don't make a living from writing, I have other talents that keep me solvent, but that's the best part because I never feel a need to write 'for' anyone. Rather, I write what I think needs to be discussed and contemplated, what other guys probably already know, but can't really articulate.

1 upvotesHerelam3 years ago

When are you going to debate Paul Elam on his An Ear For Men Youtube channel?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I honestly don't think a debate between myself and Elam will resolve much of anything, particularly after his Roosh interview. Our fundamental disagreement will be about his ego-investment in egalitarian-equalist sex roles as opposed to evolved complementary binary gender roles.

Furthermore, An Ear for Men is his game and nothing like a neutral debate would occur.

1 upvoteslozboss3 years ago


Good to have you here. Shame that SoSuave is now useless.

Simple one:

How do you get over the bitterness/anger at women and have something fruitful in a LTR?

I'm two years redpill yesterday and I seriously detest women and their actions.

1 upvoteschris_sydney3 years ago

Hi Rollo,

Should women be a main dish or a side dish in man's life?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Women should only ever be a complement to a man's life, never the focus of it.

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

Rollo, I am about to graduate from college from my Master's program with NO idea on what I want to do next in life. I got an MBA, have limited to almost no money (spent on the education), am in America on a student VISA and at 24 I am unsure on what to do next.

I love soccer, got a scholarship for it here in America, but don't think I am good enough to play it professionally. I moved out here for my ex-girlfriend and realize I am all in this by myself and am unsure on what to do next?


1 upvotesmasterpiece003 years ago

Rollo, we all know the SMV chart and the RP philosophy, usually something like -- 'women enjoy the riches of sexual market and general histrionic overrated popularity in their early 20's and hit wall around 30, Men at 30 are (allegedly) only just walking into the grounds of their newly built castle, climbing the stairs to the roof to survey the land and to strategize what to conquer in their life (aside from personnel pursuits, this is basically when the women whom they couldn't attract before are now in an abundance). But personally I see a big contradiction and can't understand the logic.

You've said in The Rational Male - 'Dream Killer's' -

"If you are single at 35 with a moderate amount of personal success, you are the envy of man-dom because you possess two of the most valuable resources most men your age or older statistically do not – time and freedom. I envy you. You are unshackled by the responsibilities, liabilities and accountabilities that most men your age in marriages, LTRs, with children, or recovering from divorce must contend with daily. Without any intention you are in such a position that you can go in any direction of your choosing without considering the impact of your choice for anyone but yourself. Many other men, in the most ideal of LTRs, do not have this luxury."

Male SMV peaks around mid thirties, more than 10 years after a girl in his same demographic is at her beauty & bodily prime. So 33 year old Jack whom has had a few flings in his earlier years is now hot to trot and enters his high SMV paradigm - 32 year old Jenny at his work and and 29 year old Jane at the cafe want to be with Jack, as well as a multitude of other date-able but albeit older interests he is suddenly attracting. But he like most males Jack still just wants to go to bed with high SMV girls, the same types he wanted in his 20's - all of which are aged 17 - 24.

As discussed in various realms, girls seem to stick to men their age group, so these girls Jack likes and is attracted to are hooking up with college males or white & blue collar, early - mid twenties men, whom by a stroke of irony -> Have apparently the lowest SMV a male can have.

So basically Jack has the choice of one hundred women whom have rode the carousel for 10+ years? Wouldn't the men who are in their age group, bedding the women in their prime the ones with the high SMV? Obviously if this is the case than the charts are wrong.

If the male 4's (by the smv chart) or thereabouts in their 20's are sleeping with all the best prime women, whom all men want to sleep with, arn't these then the only high SMV males? and is the reason for my confusion. Which sounds a lot like the argument that 20% of men (Alphas) are dating 80% of the women in the sexual market place.

Jack is still left with all the well worn 20+ notch, post wall women searching for beta bucks even though Jack is apparently an 8 and seemingly & rapidly according to all literature and discussion - 'going up in value' as he ages.

I find it hard to grasp and much of what is discussed seems to overlap and contradict, Would love to hear your experiences and thoughts.

3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

You're making a comparative peak mistake here. Remember two things; women's sexual priorities shift as they mature (Preventive Medicine) and necessity and a capacity to capitalize on Hypergamous opportunity changes as a woman's maturity changes.

Both Jenny and Jane are in a demographic (Epiphany Phase) where they come to realize their ability to compete intra-sexually for the highest SMV men is greatly reduced because those men are more interested in the women they had more trouble bedding (the 22-24 cohort) in the past, but now miraculously, have access to.

Thus, Jenny & Jane's sexual priorities have shifted from short term Alpha Fucks in their 20's to long term Beta Bucks as they age out of the SMP. So yes, penniless fuck musicians (such as myself) may've gotten laid like tile when a woman's sexual priorities are driven by Alpha sex gratification, but they're a poor choice when Jenny's priorities are all about long term security and parental investment.

You're also making a mistake about women looking for men within their own age demographic. Statistically women prefer men to be between 5-8 years older than themselves. That's expressed preference too. Statistically, monogamous pairings in western countries leans even to 6-9 years older. In fact the only demographic of women who expressly seek younger lovers are divorceé women in their late 30s and early 40s. Why? Because once again, her sexual priorities shift back from guaranteed security (which she's likely already established) to Alpha fucks short term sex – something she missed as a sacrifice for long term security.

1 upvotesmasterpiece003 years ago

Okay, thanks for clarifying that. I am actually half way through my second read of The Rational Male now, so it seems being a never married, childless, debtless single 31 year old (albeit without the disposable income) isn't so bad.

1 upvotesAscended_One3 years ago

Purple-pill time! TRP principes work because they target the older parts of our brain (evolutionary speaking). The reactive parts. We as humans are however able to override our impulses thanks to our frontal cortex and self-awareness.

You say that TRP principes (dread game, preselection...) apply to all women (AWALT), but you also propose to always drop plates that do not yield results and look for more rewarding prospects.

Isn't it possible that the plates we drop like this were actually unicorns that the depressing parts of TRP doesn't apply to? Isn't it possible that NAWALT, but we never give women the chance to prove it?

1 upvotesAscended_One3 years ago

Thanks for the reply! Are you sure you've replied with the correct article? I fail to see how it answers the question :S

To clarify something: I feel the red pill truths to be true, I just find it hard to internalize them unless I can defend them against objections like these.

1 upvotesNergaal3 years ago

Rollo, BR conditions men to lifegoals that are nothing more than Disney dreams, but not achievable IRL. If the conditioning is strong, TRP sometimes makes some men bitter and unmotivated to anything, to the point that nothing really seems to matter, since nothing that TRP promises is anywhere as endorphin-inducing as those surreal BP dreams, not even MGTOW.

What have you found to help move on and become again self-motivated, productive men?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Honestly I think just becoming Red Pill aware ought to be a motivator in and of itself. Think about the opportunities that are now open to you as a result of understanding the code in the Matrix. Think of what an incredible advantage this represents to you that other men lack an awareness of and are contented in their Blue Pill doldrums.

1 upvotesNergaal3 years ago

Hey Rollo, thanks for taking time to answer. One thing that BP does, accidentally, is condition people to go over hard times with Disney-esque hopes - "I'll get over this cause at some point in the near future all my virtues will be rewarded with a nice wife, happy life, and respect for all my efforts/sacrifices". The problem with RP is when you you find yourself again in those deep holes, nothing is as "promising" as those BP dreams. How do you get yourself to "dream" again but a RP version so you fight through the shit that life offers?

And a quick question: "How would you convince Cypher that the red pill was still the better choice?" Cypher is the Matrix guy that regrets not choosing the blue pill.

1 upvotesDronitto3 years ago

So, i am in a dead end. Stupid job, low pay, no alternative jobs, almost no skill(just basic computer stuff, some knowledge of a foreign language). A small debt to pay, school to pay(the school suck tho...). No father, 23 years old, no savings. How the hell i climb this shit when i am 23 years old... Everyday i go to work, come back, eat, train, read some books or learn some new words on duolingo but then its time to bed. I can feel my soul is dead in these conditions.

1 upvotesand_what_not3 years ago

Rollo, first of all thank you for doing the AMA!

What simple advice would you have for the guys trying but failing to overcome the anger phase?

1 upvotesichbinron3 years ago

Hey Rollo,

How did you meet your Wife & what made you decide to settle down w her? This is because your advice has helped me to break free of a Provider/Beta mentality so I'm just curious what special qualities she has for you to commit. Thanks!!!

1 upvoteslqtys3 years ago

Do you think feeling a deep connection with a girl and not wanting an LTR with her are incompatible things? Is it possible to feel deep connection and rapport with a plate without implying a one-itis or long term relationship? (I mean, just living experiences, traveling together, doing things different than just fucking, but also plating more girls at same time).

Of course I have to add that I liked your books too much and I really enjoyed your style of writing, even when my mediocre english skills made it difficult for me sometimes to understand it (being difficult does not equal not enjoying it, challenges are always enjoyable, and you learn a lot).

1 upvotesmanwhowouldbeking3 years ago

Where do you find your motivation or discipline? Did you develop them or was it something that you always just had.

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Developed. And I'm still developing it actually.

1 upvotesD0ngl33 years ago

Dear Rollo (or anyone knowledgeable),

I fucked up. This woman pulled my number. Caught me off guard. We had some weird text exchanges. She admitted to a friend of hers that she's horny and wants to fuck me. I have no game. The window is closing, if not closed already. I need quick & dirty pointers so I can make her a plate.

There's an overwhelming amount of reading to do. I don't need theory -- I need a guide

3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Hesitate and thou art lost.

Act as if you have a 10" cock.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Errr... Just fuck her? Think of how to plate later.

1 upvotesD0ngl33 years ago

Okay, how do I fuck her? I'm no virgin but I really don't know how I ever got laid

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

Invite her to your place to "hangout". If she asks what you will do, say netflix and chill or smoke weed (if she is that kind of girl) or whatever really. When she gets there, physically escalate. Mood is right? Take her by the hand and lead her to the bedroom. Rest is... Well. Easy

1 upvotesteamjkforawhile3 years ago

No question, but thank you for what you do. Your book brought so much clarity to me when I was going through the usual "but I did everything right" mindset. Thank you. You've helped me become a much happier person with a much better life.

1 upvotesex_addict_bro3 years ago

EDiT EDIT EDIT: I just managed to solve this riddle myself, answer at the end. I'd love to hear your opinion mr T if you like.

I n-closed a petite 23-yo Asian girl at the gym a few weeks ago, she's from Taiwan and she is studying in my town. I'm 37.

me: is that your boyfriend or your bodyguard?

her: boyfriend! I'm [xxx] by the way.

me: hey. good, because I'm afraid of bodyguards. so, would your boyfriend mind if I take you out for coffee this evening?

her, smiling: of course he would!

me: but you don't know that for sure! go ask him

and I go to another part of the gym.

She came back, looked very interested. She fucking went and asked the boyfriend if he minds that. Wow. But then, then she asked me if I mind her boyfriend coming out with us - I said "no problem" - and she gave me her phone no. She then exercised a bit nearby, then came again to me to say "bye" and we had a short chat. She looked like DTF, proliferative phase for the win. I'm white, muscilar and I probably weight 2-3 times as much as her. Her Asian dude, shit, maybe he's got more IQ, but he looked a bit feminine.

I texted her 2 times - 1st time she was busy, 2nd time she did not reply for few days... then I got a reply from her today, something about her studying a lot recently and that she wants to meet for a lunch next week, with her bf.

Basically I don't do food dates AND her bf is going to be there. But, she is thousands of miles from her home, she is very small and she may be an easy target for a thief or a robber or a rapist. And, she doesn't know anything about me.

So basically I wonder if I should rather go there for a lunch date (and build some rapport, not sure how would I handle her bf or if I even should handle him) -- or text her my proposition instead.

How would you proceed? Or, should I just n-close another Asian girl there?

I texted her that... I don't want to go out with her boyfriend, that I find her somehow interesting and this doesn't mean that I want to do her in the backseat of my car when I see her, but let's meet for a coffee and see how'd we go from there. That I understand she's alone thousands of miles from her country and that she may be afraid, and I understand that she knows shit about me and I may be a polar bear hunter or a thug or an anaesthesiologist and that's why I propose she chooses the venue she feels safe in (and I still propose a club near the place she probably lives and give information I'm available tommorow). Give it some thought girl and let me know when you're ready for your intercontinental adventure.

Whew. Inspired by Mark Manson. A bit gay, but on the other hand, I think that's the best way to reach her and not look like a man who wants to kidnap her for a ransom.

1 upvotesStrum_Gewehr3 years ago

What are your views on porn ?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Not a fan. Porn is anesthesia for men: https://therationalmale.com/2011/11/17/the-pheromonal-beta/

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

[permanently deleted]

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I take issue with the popular conception of what Mark presumes is vulnerability here: https://therationalmale.com/2014/11/23/vulnerability/

1 upvotesJosephMGTOW3 years ago

question: is mgtow a valid path to choose?

1 upvotestruthseeker2013 years ago


do you think The Red Pill is compatible at all with Christianity? I am a born again Christian but struggle with deciding if TRP and Christianity has common ground. Are there any good Christian based TRP authors or material ai could read.


5 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Yes, but I would refer you to Dalrock's blog for more practical information.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

What are your thoughts on The Power of Now? Are we spiritual beings even? Is enlightenment achievable?

Or is this all nonsense and moral values are all part of our social conditioning and we should just maximize our own utility instead while deprogramming us from the moral barriers and go full dark triad?

1 upvotesDe-Rezzer3 years ago

Recently bought your audiobook and had a go through multiple times. Enjoyed every bit of it but having trouble really "killing the beta" and recreating those old paradigms that were set. I know you introduced a lot of information about it but what would you recommend to someone who is struggling with this? (Any advice from the trp is appreciated as well!)

1 upvotesFurrowBeard3 years ago


My question pertains to the future in regards to red pill philosophy and feminism. In your opinion, when can we expect feminism to die out and the western western world to move towards a more healthy culture of gender dynamic acceptance and aclnowledgment? I'd be very interested in any further reading into this topic as well if you can provide me with any.

3 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Unfortunately no. The Feminine Imperative is always fluidly reimagining itself and rewriting its own histories. Whether that's Chivalry or Feminism (both ideological extensions of the FI) or something else, you can expect there will be some new social incarnation so long as there are men and women's power paradigms.

1 upvotesRPSnuggles3 years ago

What do you view as the best way to reset your brain after a BPD ex and a financial crisis soon after?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Time away and for yourself is paramount in my opinion. I rarely endorse 'monk-mode' but in this case I would.

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

Right here with you Snuggles. How was she BPD?

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

She had maybe two of these.

1 upvotesRPSnuggles3 years ago

A few of these were situational. A couple were steady.

A big tell is a woman who uses always and never statements constantly when anyone who knows the truth knows it is a lie. Ex. I never do this.

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

So you think she does have a BPD, just because she says always and never.

1 upvoteskanyewost3 years ago

Dropping to in to pay homage to a legend

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

When does the Third book come out, what is different about it?

Also, what's the best advice you can give to a 24 year old graduating from College who does not know what to do?

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

Why do you recommend the book Mastery so much?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

Because, next to 48 Laws of Power, I think it is Robert Greene's best book. It really answers a lot of the "what should I do with my life Rollo?" questions very succinctly.

1 upvotesPranksterLad3 years ago

You are a hero Rollo. I don't know what to do with my life to be honest after graduating college.

1 upvotesbillcosbyeatsbabies3 years ago

What should I dress up as for Halloween?

1 upvotesDavid_029_Tredecies3 years ago

I really hate my parents for turning me a nice guy, not achieving my goals, and instead of saving my money for my better future and ended up using my money for my parent's favor (bills, electricity, food, debt, etc.) while trying to hide my 10% of salary as I can. I was planning to leave the house from my parents once I become rich and started to become an "alpha male" to improve my wealth, sexual life, and status. I can still appreciate and sense some of my dad's trait since he has good social circle with the friends from Saudi since my dad is an OFW (Overseas Filipino Worker) working as a sales manager for Kanoo Cargo. He even had a background about living as a group against pesky assholes in a non-violent and judging way and sometimes my dad taught me some good valuable skills that is somewhat related to RP (word power and conversational skills redirected as a reference from MACK Tactics by Dean Cortez) but coincidental. I'm proud that my dad has a manly testosterone and lifestyle including some of his friends and his brothers back in his old days from the 80's and they also used to be excellent trainees during military drill exercise during martial law in Philippines, circa 1970's. Even my uncle, living now in USA, was a great military strategist and even aced out the military exams. So good, they even tried to promote him a higher ranking officer (lieutenant and above) for war but he turn them down.

I still believe I have some remaining genes of strong man. But still, my parents doesn't understand my journey on reformatting my lifestyle and the problems such as being a bullied victim and having cluelessness about different people's culture as my parents assumed they're bad guys due to sex, vulgar words, and the way they live in this such social life. Drugs is out the line and won't do good obviously. Even worse, my parents taught me to be a nice guy which is suck. I have to improve myself more on something what's lacking and the struggles in learning PUA-related skills to build my balls and mentality and game. i was a lone wolf, currently struggled for self-help and I'm 25 years old.

Anyways...What's the best way to hate and deal with my beta-related parents for raising me a shitty version of myself instead of understanding the culture, money, and my respect? I hope I didn't over-complicate my introverted thoughts as I tried my best to explain my situation after I took the red pill. I have a lot of question in my mind trying to get the every right question needed to ask.

4 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

The first step is letting go of their complicity in raising you Blue Pill. You can resent them all you want, but it doesn't get you anywhere in the long run. In all likelihood they probably didn't realize what they were doing. They just raised you as their own Blue Pill programming taught them would be best.

There's not a lot of money in revenge, or resentment. Your mental energies would be better applied towards your own betterment in a Red Pill perspective. Then, once you've built something of yourself in that awareness you can serve as an example of your Red Pill success in spite of their failed Blue Pill ideological upbringing of you.

1 upvotesDavid_029_Tredecies3 years ago

I see. That's all I need to manage my thoughts, necessities, and my goals needed to achieve what I wanna become. Thanks, man.

1 upvotesAnon2414693 years ago

You've expressed that porn is an anesthetic for men, and you've expressed that enjoying the services of escorts can be used as a "buffer" (not sure how that word is appropriate), but my question is, do you think enjoying the company of escorts will improve, or hinder, a man's game? Or perhaps do nothing at all with respect to one's game?

Is seeking the companionship of escorts, in your opinion, a wise decision for a young man (20s) who has already been successful in most of his endeavors (with the exception of becoming a successful player) and has more than enough discretionary income (after saving for house/retirement) to see them 2+ times per month?

2 upvotesRollo-Tomassi [OP]3 years ago

I cover that topic here:


Generally I'm of the opinion that if you buy a man a hooker you get him laid for a night, but if teach a man Game you get him laid for a lifetime. If a guy is in such a state that he would benefit from a confidence boost that fucking an escort would give him, then yes, but with the caveat that if he makes a practice of it (or a lifestyle of it) then it will hinder his understanding and internalization of Red Pill awareness and using Game.

Here's a few other links where I analyze this:



1 upvotesVancouverSucks3 years ago

A new girlfriend said she is totally in to me but wanted to warn me that she has considered swinging with past boyfriends after their sex life went stale. Is this a major red flag or is it just AWALT ?

1 upvotesOneRedYear3 years ago

What the hell happened to Sosuave? That place is a cesspool.

1 upvotesAnon2414693 years ago

What is your opinion of nofap?

1 upvotesAscended_One3 years ago

Let us have these premises:

  1. It is advisable to spin plates.
  2. In the first stages of dating, one should not overtly tell the girl that she's just another in the rotation. It may be covertly expressed via behaviour, but the girl should be left in suspense.
  3. In later phases of seeing each other (ideally not before having sex with the girl for at least 2 times), the rules should be clearly voiced and an open relationship is established.

My hypothesis is: isn't it possible that by this time, the girl is already hooked/in-love with you and this is the only reason why she agrees to these terms? In order to cling to you and keep you, even though you're not exclusive to her?

She would not have agreed to these terms were they verbalized in the first stages of dating. She only agrees to them later when she's already psychologically hooked.

What I'm asking: is this moral? Doesn't it sound like psychological manipulation?

I know the standard TRP explanation is that I'm brainwashed by feminine blue-pill conditioning, which may be true, but I actually wish for someone to prove me wrong in this case.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 3 years ago

What would you tell the men who believe it's too late to change? Men who have been stagnated by depression, addiction, hopelessness; and wish to find a reason to wake up in the morning?

© TheRedArchive 2020. All rights reserved.