An Ode to Living Alone

whiskey_and_oreos · 2022-04-23T23:04:13+00:00

Tbh I've never found a single downside to living alone. Whatever I can't figure out how to fix, I can pay someone else to do it or trade with a friend. I can have all of my needs met while maintaining my own space to retreat to at the end of the day.

lunchladyshand · 2022-04-23T23:57:04+00:00

No surprise guests is a huge one for me! Nothing worse than coming home from a long day and there are six of your roommates friends hogging the couch and standing around your kitchen.

I’ve lived alone for almost ten years now and I will never live with anyone (aside from my dog!) ever again.

The_Oracle_of_Delphi · 2022-04-24T01:55:59+00:00

When you live with a partner, you are always “on” for them, so you can never fully relax and just be yourself. This is more draining than people realize. I see my future relationships as the living-apart-together variety.

msromperstomper · 2022-04-24T01:17:10+00:00

Just sitting in my kitchen with a cup of coffee staring into space. Really. I left a long term relationship and moved into my own place last year. It is so tranquil. I never realized that with my ex I spent almost every single minute when he was around feeling on edge. It's actually taken some time to get used to this new peaceful feeling.

virgoran · 2022-04-24T01:51:53+00:00

I used to HATE walking into my home and hearing the wonderful tones of guns and violence blaring through my home as he played video games. Now I come home to fresh flowers and calming tunes!

asoww · 2022-04-24T00:44:05+00:00

I've started living alone almost a month ago. It is literally amazing.

My space is a great source of confort and strength
I can go back to it whenever, without having to deal with any toxic poeple around me
The feeling of being independent and in control of my adult life is priceless

ultblue7 · 2022-04-24T02:12:21+00:00

Lol this is why I was so confused when my ex said he hated living alone. I was like—isnt that the ideal situation?? I guess thats just us.

Longjumping-Stand242 · 2022-04-24T00:09:05+00:00

Living alone is the best thing that ever happened to me

basuragoddess · 2022-04-23T22:49:11+00:00

Using the restroom with the door open, coming and going as I please without answering to anybody, sleeping in any room I feel like, generally existing on whatever schedule you want and no one’s judging you stumbling in whether it’s 5pm or 3am

Thunderbird_Freya · 2022-04-24T00:06:37+00:00

No grief, no unwanted visits from his family or brothers etc. Or if you come home tired you don’t have to cook his dinner because he’s too lazy to do anything for himself.

buttercupcake23 · 2022-04-24T00:56:52+00:00

Eating whatever the fuck you want and cooking whatever the fuck you want whenever you want really is underrated.

I love my husband but if I was single I could actually have make proteins other than just chicken or beef. I could add mushrooms right into my sauce without having to cook them separately and add them later. I would be able to make 1 type of eggs. My noodles would be as spicy as I want them to be instead of having to portion out his serving first before I add extra spice to my portion. I could have curry and ethnic food ALL THE TIME.

The problem with living with someone is that it's not economical or practical to plan and make separate meals. We are comfortable enough that when I truly want to eat something that I know he won't eat I will just either make it or get it via takeout and he fends for himself because i don't feel like depriving myself. But it would be nice to do that ALL the time and never have to think about anyone else's preferences but my own.

VesperLynd- · 2022-04-23T23:48:04+00:00

Being myself. I could never do that before

AnnualValuable7848 · 2022-04-23T23:13:30+00:00

Absolutely!!!

I love starfishing and taking up the whole bed!

“Any mess is my mess” 10000%. I clean SO much less than when I had a slob pos husband, and my place is still way cleaner. No shit on the toilet (why?), no empty bottles and cans on the floor for weeks (why??), no nasty crumbs in the bed from dirty feet on the dirty floor (why?!?!). He used to say I was crazy and “giving into society’s pressure” bc I didn’t want to sleep in literal filth.

He was still surprised Pikachu face when I actually moved out and didn’t ever look back.

I see no benefit to living with anyone, ESPECIALLY a man, ever again.

ARealDame · 2022-04-24T00:09:42+00:00

The natural rhythm aspect is important...a whole other way of being and I love that about being and living alone, too.

finance_lady · 2022-04-24T01:13:43+00:00

I love all the same things as OP and so many of the commenters here about living alone!

I like having 100% thermostat control, especially at night. I am very particular about my sleeping temps and conditions. I need the thermostat turned to 65 (no matter if it's heat or AC), a box fan on for air circulation/white noise, and blackout curtains with zero lighting - not even a night light. I have specific Alexa bedtime and wake-up routines too. Then, I need weight/security from my blankets. I truly believe that if I ever move in with a HVM in the future one of my conditions will be that we have separate bedrooms. If I have to share a bed then I don't sleep as cold as I like due to body heat from the other person. Plus even if a guy is HV, he might be just as picky about total opposite conditions as me, so there's no point arguing about it when we can just sleep separately!

I love being able to eat the same meals repeatedly without someone complaining that "we had this 3x this week already" or something.

I like being able to come home to silence, esp. if I have a rough day at work (or, if I work from home that day, coming out of my home office to silence lol) and not have to talk to anyone. I also like that I don't have to converse 5 min after I get out of bed in the morning before I am fully awake

My TV is always on what I want to watch. My Alexa devices play the music that I want in whatever room I'm on.

I can walk around naked if I want or need to without comments or "hey let's have sex" talk

Things are always as clean or as dirty as I leave them

I have only lived with one boyfriend in the past (like 15 years ago now) and my ex-husband (like 8 years ago). My most recent boyfriend (over 2 years ago) spent weekends at my place a lot bc he lived with his parents full-time and that was plenty for me, I was so happy to be alone during the week. Hahahaha. Anyway yeah no rush to move in with anyone or even have traditional roommates. My parents stay with me when they visit (from out of state) and even that gets annoying very quickly for just 1-2 weeks at a time.

meetme__atsunset · 2022-04-23T23:05:54+00:00

I enjoy getting to be naked all the time. My ex used to poke fun at me about it.

I also like getting to be my naturally cluttered self without complaint.

I am almost always cold and constantly have heaters on/several blankets on the bed, so it's nice to get zero feedback on that.

I too eat the same meals day in and day out, and it's heavenly.

I am typically an early-to-bed type and don't miss dealing with other people's lights/sounds when I'm trying to sleep.

Some days I just stay in bed or on the couch the entire day, and the peace without judgment is amazing.

erraticjudgment · 2022-04-23T23:27:31+00:00

The cleanliness, décor, and quietness are truly the best, same with walking around as dressed or undressed as you want, leaving the bathroom door open, just doing your own thing. I personally like living alone for all of those reasons however I do dislike sleeping alone and tend to be a bit antsy and unproductive when nobody else is around.

I think living alone with excellent neighbors and/or living with an excellent partner is the answer (for me at least), and probably a bigger place so that if I need space we don't have to be in the same room. I also think couples having at least one other room (whether that be a "guest room" or a genuine separate bedroom) is an excellent idea, I initially found it off putting when I was younger and inexperienced, but after living with two different partners I genuinely understand why it's a good idea.

IAteTheDragon · 2022-04-24T08:26:13+00:00

No need to look somewhat 'presentable' at home. I roam around in stretched out pajamas, unstyled hair, just as god made me. No audience.

I can freely be gassy and burp whenever I want, without feeling inadequate.

My home is my charger. I love to just walk in, transform into a pajama roamer and do whatever the hell I please. Sleep late, be lazy, look like a savage, not have to explain myself to anybody. Freedom! It is essential to my overall wellbeing, having this personal space and time to recharge. 💃

thewetdog_ · 2022-04-24T00:31:58+00:00

Nobody makes passive aggressive comments to me.

Nobody complains about my attitude, or my tone, or my face.

Nobody comments on me eating too much, not working or exercising enough, or allegedly spending too much.

I can order a 🥰bucket of fried bbq chicken and a pound of coleslaw and enjoy it by myself while I watch nostalgia shows in peace, without judgment.

Nobody double-dipping their slobbery utensils in the cream cheese, hummus or yoghurt and contaminating all the food.

Not worrying about the people I live with talking about me behind my back, whether to family, friends, exes or orbiters.

Not hearing that my beautiful cotton, full length pajamas aren't sexy and that I should sleep with a t shirt and thong wtf

Nobody minding that I drink a pot of coffee in the morning while I doomscroll /catch up on the news.

No more freaking Fox News from 7pm until bedtime. Never having to hear Laura Ingraham or Tucker Carlson blasting while Im trying to paint my nails or enjoy my damn sushi. This is the best.

Nobody going through my things ever again.

CatSweets · 2022-04-24T03:00:53+00:00

I've lived alone for 7 years, now I'm back with my family (temporarily, I'm saving for a down payment on a condo). It's been only one month by I already felt like dying multiple times 😅

Living alone was the best thing I ever did in my life. I've never lived with a man (only family and roommates) and never will. I need my space and my peace. Can't wait to have my own house and be alone with my cat again sighs

DarbyGirl · 2022-04-23T23:06:39+00:00

Allll this 100%. Also agree with leaving the bathroom door open (my pets like to "supervise" ), keeping the house as messy or clean as I like it, changing what I want, eating what I want and not finding that someone else ate something that I was saving for later or used the last of something without telling me. No smelling someone else's cooking smells and the only snoring I hear is my dog's and occasionally that of my 13 year old cat.

Junior-Lion7893 · 2022-04-24T00:51:20+00:00

Folding my own laundry and not having him tell me I’m doing it wrong.

ferociouslycurious · 2022-04-24T00:29:43+00:00

One of the last things before my ex left was a coffee table. I hate coffee tables in my space. I don’t spend enough time sitting in the living room and the dogs need room to play. He started working on a live edge coffee table. I was thinking to myself how I was going to manage to live with it or talk him out of it. When he left, I felt relief that the coffee table would be gone. Yeah, his value was lower than the stress of living with a coffee table.

galian84 · 2022-04-24T03:28:06+00:00

Oh, yes, all of this. I live with my family now after leaving an abusive ex and am saving money to eventually buy a house. But I was never happier than when I was living alone.

Nobody judged me on what I wore, what time I woke up, what time I got out of bed, or how I chose to decorate my place. No more worrying about having to always clean up someone else's mess and tell me how to live in MY home. I don't have to deal with people inviting their friends over and then having those friends overstay their welcome, or worse, act creepy toward me. I can blast music and sing as loud as I want. I can write and read in peace.

I lived with my abusive ex who pretty much took over my space with all his shit, complained about how I decorated my house and how everything got in his way, and hogged the TV to watch the shows and movies HE wanted to see and to be on his Playstation for hours a day. Not to mention the nights he would go out and get so drunk that he'd come in and wake me up. I was miserable.

When I move back out, I'm not living with anyone again. My mom may eventually need a place to live, but my brother and I are planning on getting a duplex so she can be near us, but not live with us, and I'd live in a tiny home.

BasieSkanks · 2022-04-24T08:09:17+00:00

I’ve lived on my own for years. Even though it’s more expensive, peace of mind is priceless. I don’t envy my friends who pay less, but have to share a kitchen and bathroom with strangers. My space is my own. I can do what I want, and I don’t think people fully appreciate that level of freedom.

IndividualRoutine661 · 2022-04-24T10:30:17+00:00

My kitchen is set up for me coming down in the morning.

I never have to accommodate the feels or bad moods of a man

My dog can sleep on my bed

So many positives

oscine23 · 2022-04-24T13:12:56+00:00

“No one is eating my treats” 😂

We are kindred souls. Lol

So, I’ve been dating a wonderful man for almost two years and he wants to marry me. I love him but don’t necessarily want to be married bc the idea of living with another person again (I’m divorced) makes me cringe. Feeling obligated to take care of another person, of someone in my space allll the time, sleeping next to me every night, a penis poking me in my back every morning…turns me off.

My friend is like, “”But you love him, don’t you?” Yes, very much! But I love my space and autonomy more. I feel like living with him would ruin everything.

maracat1989 · 2022-04-24T14:44:14+00:00

Nobody destroying your belongings! I had an ex who set a heavy ass safe onto my dining table, then dragged it across the entire length leaving two HUGE scratches. He also ate a hot meal on top of my antique desk and left two large white heat marks. Absolute idiot.

thinktwiceorelse · 2022-04-24T09:49:47+00:00

I live with my parents at the moment. I lived alone before, and liked it better than living with roommates which I hated with passion. But I felt lonely very often. I like the idea of someone else in their room just being there and not bothering me. I'm moving to the another part of the house with my own entrance and bathroom, and I'll have my privacy and also I won't be completely on my own. Can't wait.

Corn_Snakes_Are_Cute · 2022-04-24T11:54:18+00:00

Living alone is so much better. After living with my huge family and then in a dormitory with 3 girls in university I don't want to go back to that ever again, even if it's going to be just with one roommate.

- no one touches my things
- no one is making a mess that I have to clean up
- no one fucking eats my food
- no one interrupts my sleep or naps after a hard day at work
- no one wastes my alone time
- no one pressures me to go get drinks etc when I want to study or workout
- I feel free and do whatever I want to in MY own space
- I don't dread coming home

I can go on and on but you get the point.

bunni-cactus · 2022-04-23T23:53:42+00:00

I have children, but don’t share my home with a SO. It’s amazing. Not sure I could ever go back. I love the freedom to do what I want to do with my home. I also love that my mood dictates my day. Not someone else’s. (Well, other than a kiddo! But they have an excuse. They’re kids)

millennialpink2000 · 2022-04-24T14:56:52+00:00

Tons of Scrotes Offended by this post. Ha HA.

throhawey123 · 2022-04-24T01:11:22+00:00

Thanks sis!! I sometimes feel a little guilty for being just so happy alone. Certainly people try to make me feel like shit about it! But the peace and serenity is just something else.

Fuck it, i stand by it! The only male allowed in my house is my pet, and he got his balls cut off 😈

Devils_Tango · 2022-04-23T23:15:46+00:00

I would like to propose living with another single woman you vibe with is also fantastic, as I am very lucky to experience right now. I tend to isolate when depressed so I get a live-in friend with zero drama, feel safer, plus rent is expensive af where I live, and she helps take care of my baby cats :)

Carneliancat · 2022-04-24T17:05:03+00:00

Clean, crisp sheets unmarred by man-grease and stale beer farts. My bed is a clean and cozy snore-free utopia.

millennialpink2000 · 2022-04-24T03:50:26+00:00

My list is the same as yours. Seriously, I wish I was living alone currently. 😅

spinsterchachkies · 2022-04-24T12:08:47+00:00

Even when having a partner I will still do this. I like living alone. I really don’t want to live with a man. I’d at most let them have a drawer but that’s it. I cannot understate how much I dislike living with roommates and with boyfriends. Being alone on your own is just 👌🏻 chefs kiss

HappyCoconutty · 2022-04-24T02:34:16+00:00

I am in my late 30s, happily married with a child I adore to bits. But I can attest that absolutely nothing beats the time that I was living alone in my 20s. Please savor and relish in it if you have it.

I’m currently trying to save up for a she shed in the backyard so that I can feel this splendor again.

atreegrowsinbrixton · 2022-04-24T04:38:41+00:00

maybe one day i'll be able to live completely alone...

The_Oracle_of_Delphi · 2022-04-24T20:59:46+00:00

There are people in some countries that live with large families in extremely tight quarters. I cannot understand how these people can tolerate the utter lack of privacy and quiet time. I would lose my mind for sure….

eastisfucked · 2022-04-24T12:18:18+00:00

I want to move out so bad, shits expensive though

jetcake · 2022-04-24T19:09:44+00:00

This is my "Mine and mine only" list:

- MY laundry. I don't have to wash a guy's things or worry about him throwing my clothes in the washer if I go out and leave things there to wash .

- My wardrobe gets the dedicate closet and drawer space it deserves. The same goes for my bathroom.

- I'm the only one eating my food :D

- If my space is a mess, it is my mess, and I will clean it when I feel like it.

- My own schedule. If I want to rent a movie or watch TV, I'll stay up as long as I want to.

- Money is mine and mine only, so you don't piss and moan to me about what I am spending for myself.

- No guy borrows my car or asks me to drive!

Davina33 · 2022-04-24T07:14:10+00:00

I absolutely love it. I have lived alone for a year now. My workload has halved since leaving my shitty ex. I can't believe how much time I spent cleaning up after him! My home is beautifully decorated, no one to answer to. I can watch what I want when I want one my televisions. No pissy toilets or sport on 24/7.

The resentment I used to feel when living with messy ex boyfriends and flat mates was horrible. I wouldn't ever want to feel like that again. I have high standards and always felt ill at ease with messy/dirty people. I've lived in homes with mice/carpet beetle/mealworm infestations and I still suffer nightmares. I cannot tell you how much I value a pest free, clean home.

Biracial_tooth_fairy · 2022-04-24T17:21:50+00:00

Nobody disrupts you while you are working
can decorate your place exactly how you want *

mitzislippers · 2022-04-24T13:14:16+00:00

I want this so bad

Mayonegg420 · 2022-04-24T18:41:17+00:00

The roommates watching the tv they couldn’t chip in on after I got home ready to watch a movie…..never again lol

MgrofChaos · 2022-04-24T18:19:46+00:00

Can confirm. Especially the snacks thing. 😋

dlynne5 · 2022-04-24T10:11:40+00:00

Are you me?

hasha28 · 2022-04-24T18:30:46+00:00

Only time I have cursed being a single home owner was yesterday when I woke up to 5" of water in my basement.... Otherwise, love having my own house to myself.

Title	An Ode to Living Alone
Author	millennialpink2000
Upvotes	2080
Comments	172
Date	April 23, 2022 10:34 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/uagk5c/an_ode_to_living_alone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/an-ode-to-living-alone.1111418 https://theredarchive.com/post/1111418

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