Weekly FDS Chat/ Check-In

mamadgaf · 2021-07-26T16:06:46+00:00

Thanks to this sub I just blocked a LVM. I had unfriended him on Facebook a few weeks ago (also thanks to FDS) but it didn’t occur to me to block him on my phone.

This LVM and I went to college together. We connected via Facebook years ago and after I got a divorce he asked me out and I accepted. Well it quickly became clear that he was looking for a FWB situation, and I told him I wasn’t interested in that.

He’ll text me every few months and we’ll briefly chat. He HMU last night and I BLOCKED HIM.

BYE SCROTE!!

Pickled_Tink_Tea · 2021-07-27T11:11:40+00:00

I think I've met a HVM. We've been taking it very slowly. He's kind, consistent, affectionate, funny, responsible, caring, intelligent, open with his emotions and we've really clicked.

He's planned really lovely dates for us. Some nice meals out, others tailored to my interests.

He's just making it very clear that he's interested in me as a person, and developing a connection with me. He's not once pushed for sex.

I usually hate dating, but I'm having a great time getting to know him.

princesspoppy77 · 2021-07-26T17:16:37+00:00

Just wanted to say I’m out here ghosting scrotes left and right and seeing red flags in such a glaringly obvious way. Growth my friends, growth. over-it vibes are creeping in though, I’m utterly unimpressed by every dude. Like, I’m jaded now I guess 🤷‍♀️

Breesasha · 2021-07-26T16:47:17+00:00

This week seems like a hard one. I'm in my late 20s, I found FDS during COVID and it kicked me into overdrive; I start setting boundaries with friends and family. I let go of LV female friends, I started evaluating my male friends (realizing that it wasn't as platonic as I wanted it to be), and I started really analysing myself. I am trying to work on my weight, I started getting in touch with my spiritually, etc. But my social life and dating life has stagnated...I'm not sure how to revive it.

GiraffeLibrarian · 2021-07-27T22:50:28+00:00

Chatting with a guy I matched with.. he had the cajones to say, “I feel like you should be the one impressing me.” I just… couldn’t block fast enough!

PenneyPence · 2021-07-27T00:33:33+00:00

After listening to the FDS Podcast about OLD, I joined again and got a bunch of standard low effort “Hi.” messages that I promptly blocked. Then, I just got one of those long 2 paragraph messages that completely turned me off. Maybe I’m overthinking it, but I don’t want to date someone who thinks a wall of text is the way to my heart. I’m looking for the happy medium. Mention one thing in my profile, not a full Amazon review.

IndividualRoutine661 · 2021-07-26T20:12:48+00:00

Split up with my LDR a couple of weeks ago. I wasn’t sure if he was a HVM or not. And started to realise I was not getting treated as I deserved. A few years ago I’d have tolerated/made excuses, so I’m learning to assert some boundaries. Consider me a pick me in recovery.

bougiegoomba · 2021-07-26T14:42:18+00:00

Maybe I focused too much on it, but I found it interesting to watch how the flag bearers handled the holding of the flag at the Olympic parade of nations since it’s the first time there have been two flag bearers, one woman and one man. Some where having a power struggle or others seemed more accommodating. Anybody else notice?

ZumaQueen · 2021-07-26T16:42:53+00:00

FDS has made me aware of LVM behavior in movies and books and it’s honestly astounding how frequent it is even in stories that are supposed to be romantic. I wonder if that’s part of the reason women tend to accept such behavior, as it’s clearly depicted as normal. Even Mr. Darcy, who used to be my dream man, has shown some LVM behavior and I am crushed.

Technical_Moth248 · 2021-07-26T20:03:30+00:00

A pickme actually managed to get under my skin today and I'm still... ugh. She said she was a sex worker and was going off on a facebook post calling everyone agreeing with it swerfs. It wasn't even about the women, it was about the men buying sex/sexual content being predatory. She also had to tell everyone she didn't believe in sex workers being r*ped and they probably just felt guilty because of puritanical values 🙄

I honestly don't even know what to say. I just wanted to get this out somewhere I know where none of y'all will be like "uwu but johns are so oppressed we have to support them!!!"

Golden_Lavender · 2021-07-26T15:25:42+00:00

I've been thinking of switching majors to computer science any advice from STEM ladies. Does anyone have any advice on coding. I've heard people say that you can teach yourself, is it possible to land a job with only coding certifications and no degree, do you need a STEM degree. Also what kind of jobs are available and what does that look like?

throwawayaway388 · 2021-07-28T15:03:04+00:00

I hate when men ask you out too soon, and you say you have to get to know them better, and then they just go, "ok, so what do you want to know about me?"

I don't know why it bothers me so much but it's so low effort and it seems like they're trying to rush things. Like nah, I don't want to know anything about you now lol boy, bye

throwaway8437764 · 2021-07-27T23:44:49+00:00

Tuesday ramblings: If women are the prize, why have I felt that men are the prize my entire life up until the point that I found FDS? It's so frustrating. Men in my past have treated me like trash and at the time, I still desired them more than anything in the world. I always stayed because the good parts, the serotonin and oxytocin being around them produced, made the bad parts of them seem worth it. Is it societal conditioning by the patriarchy? Basic biology and attraction? Why am I like this?!

And then I think of all the women in the world who don't know about FDS or FDS-esque principles and continue to think men are the prize and put up with trash behavior. I can't fathom still living and being apart of that world, thank god I found FDS.

meoemeowmeowmeow · 2021-07-26T14:53:11+00:00

I had a job interview Friday and I'm having all kinds of anxiety because I really really want it. They said 1 or 2 weeks before I'd get a call but I'm freaking out anyway.

annrike1 · 2021-07-28T12:22:11+00:00

I love this place like no other in the internet. Not because of dating, but because of you all. I see funny posts, thaught provocative ones, I learn a different perspective. I love hearing your stories and I want to always have this place on the internet. <3

equilibum · 2021-07-27T23:24:24+00:00

Since I started FDS it’s like I’m starting to see the world completely different.

I recently got a super amazing job in my efforts to level up… not that money is everything but i will be out earning all my peers (including the platonic male friends). I’ve noticed that all my HVW girlfriends are really excited and genuinely happy for and proud of me. The 1-3 platonic male friends I had all seem less excited and much more… sour?

Like one said I shouldn’t get too excited and it’s not in the bag yet (because I need to pass a criminal check which duh I will pass). Another repeatedly questioned if I’m sure I want it and if I can’t handle it and pushed me to consider an exit plan or a plan b in case I fail. I told him to drop it but of course it keeps coming up. I’m going to go low contact or no contact with both of them and feel really disappointed to find out they aren’t quite HVM (not fully LVM perhaps but towards that direction at the very least).

Perhaps platonic male friends just aren’t a thing!! Listen to FDS!!

hopeful_flounder93 · 2021-07-26T13:44:16+00:00

I've done so well cutting the bullshit out of my life, but lately have been feeling a bit anxious about the future. I'm 28, getting a PhD, and I think I'd like kids someday - ideally in a marriage with an HVM. I feel like I've got so much to give, but I'm at the point where it's been so long (4 years), I almost can't imagine finding someone.

My parents are getting older too, and the thought of them not getting to know their grandchildren makes me tear up.

If anyone has anything hopeful to say, I'd really appreciate it 😅😭

RecentSprinkles5997 · 2021-07-27T11:29:39+00:00

So I first joined this sub due to allowing myself to get treated like shit by romantic partners .But over time I’ve realized I had LV ppl in other areas of my life I allowed to walk all over me . I cut off bad friends, I asserted myself at work and this weekend I took the final step and cut off my abusive family after they called me out of the blue to scream at me . I realized the root of me accepting LVM all along was being trained to have low self worth by my mom . I finally feel free thanks ladies for teaching me what my biological family couldn’t ❤️

JesusisKingisLord · 2021-07-27T18:59:40+00:00

This isn’t worth a separate post but I’m just feeling a little down on my dating life right now. I recently relocated to a large city. Someone asked me out at a mixer last week, texted me for a couple days then ghosted me. Ghosting happens, and I’m not attached to this person. Just more frustrated that almost every dating encounter I have is utterly underwhelming. I want to meet men but I simultaneously don’t want to waste my time. Hopes up for what?

carmen_sandiegos_hat · 2021-07-26T14:55:46+00:00

I'm about to have a major level up financially which will allow me a lot more freedom to buy better quality clothes, better quality fruits and veggies, and to just overall be financially free. I am more than ready to begin this journey but I have a few qualms.

Each time in the past that I've advanced in some way, I've lost friends or close ties with relatives. When they advance, all of our mutual friends/family clap for them and hold parties and more but when I advance, they all say a dry "congratulations" and move on with their lives. It's something that has happened since nursery school.

At this point, it's just annoying because I've always wanted to be in a group of people where we cheer each other on but it ends up being that they all want to be cheered on while I am stuck at my same level :/

FDS-GFY · 2021-07-29T01:00:09+00:00

thanks to this sub I am leaving my LVX of 15 years. I move into my own plaace next weekend.

he was trying to be all nice- offered to loan me furniture while I bought my own, and so on. He probably thought there was still hope, and maybe there was -if he had stepped up.
tonight, a story about how far I have come.

I've been trying to get my blood pressure under control for months and he knows this--trying various medications that are having horrible side effects. tonight my bp was 175/90. I felt awful. I told him that my pressure was up and I was feeling weak and he said "I'm not a doctor, what do you want me to do?"

I was SO tired and disappointed this came out:

"just leave me alone and stop asking me stupid questions"

He said to me "you can never be happy."

and ladies, I don't know where the words came from, maybe it was all the stress on other issues in my life righ now, but the words came out

"you're right, I can't be happy. Not with you. "

well, then the mask came off: the name-calling, the reversal of the offer to loan me the furniture and so on. It was so plain to me.

all things he threatened me with I said "ok." I am so exhausted that I genuinely do not give a fuck about all the things he thinks I care about doing with him. He stormed off and slammed the door in the face of my utter indifference to him.

There was a time when I WAS happy with the crumbs from his table. I've tried to tell him for years I was going hungry, as it were.

The absolute moment I said, "no more" he showed his true self.

don't wait 15 years like I did.

you deserve better. don't ever settle for less, because at the moment you really need them, they will always disappoint you.

I am frankly, relieved. finally, maybe he'll grasp that it's really over. can you believe he was suggesting he come to my new place and help me unpack? like what delusion are you living in?

Ladyofblades · 2021-07-29T17:53:12+00:00

Just remember just because a guy is old doesn’t mean he is seeing you in a fatherly or grandfatherly way. Probably not at all. If he’s a coworker, older “friend” and being friendly 99% of the time it’s because he finds you attractive

christmasforoutlaws · 2021-07-27T13:31:23+00:00

I'm in the process of transferring to a new college and I'm so excited!

pizza_roll_boot · 2021-07-26T15:05:06+00:00

thank you FDS for the term Scrote

just... thank you

:,)

nevasana · 2021-07-29T23:02:19+00:00

I just wanted to share that I might have met a HVM! He was talking to me passionately about how porn and male/male dynamics in society negatively affects male mental health and sense of self, and I thought of you all! Our dates have been lovely, he’s excited to help me decorate my home, and he hasn’t once pressured me in a sexual direction. Hes just getting out of a long dating break and says he spent the last 2 years focusing on mental health and growth. Let’s hope he practices what he preaches and keeps this up! SQUEEEEE

EsotericKnowledge · 2021-07-26T16:22:04+00:00

So, to use a cringe "millennial-ism" --- Adulting. I feel like we need our handbook or the FDS website or some kind of side project on how to be an independent, functioning adult if for some reason your parents sucked, your childhood was bullshit, or for whatever reason you wound up at this (whichever) stage of your life without having all of those things. Because I think one of the reasons we get trapped in shit relationships and why we are endlessly let down by men, is because there's so little we know how to do ourselves. And worse, we know we want to know all this stuff, but we don't know what it entails. We don't even know what questions to ask, what skills to hone, where to start for most of it. We know we are missing stuff but we don't know what we're missing.

idk. I'm just spitballing but I feel like this could be an amazing resource for us.

queenagave · 2021-07-26T18:24:06+00:00

I hate arguing with people who can't use "I statements" and everything is "you should've done/said this." Then when you express a boundary of needing time to process the situation. Two days later they hit you with a "you're an important person, I would've liked a second chance after crossing your boundaries, but that's okay. Have a great life, sending you love and light." Then follows it up with "if that wasn't your intention my bad. My ex used to do that to me." Bc they assumed my taking time to process was me cutting them off.

PLEASE handle your damn trauma so you don't take it out on people you care about. I'm at a loss of what to do with this friend bc I care about them very deeply, however, this made me see them different and I'm not sure things could be like they were.

warinmymind94 · 2021-07-27T07:27:13+00:00

As much as I love animals and even help with fundraising and volunteering for a charity I keep coming across guys (mainly online) who borderline seem more interested in a relationship with their pet.

One guy kept referring to his pet as his "little one" and wrote paragraphs on the creature. While the few hobbies and facts I told him about myself he ignored.

Others seem only online to meet a women and use her as a way to getting a pet. I just don't get it!

valleycupcake · 2021-07-27T17:17:25+00:00

When you’d like to get to know somebody but it would be inappropriate for him to approach you. How do you get there without chasing? Cute guy works at my doctor’s office. I was there for a long procedure and we got to talking. I had to hold his hand through the pain a few times and it felt good. We were laughing and having a good time. It would be very unprofessional for him to ask for my phone number in that setting, and he didn’t. I’m not really looking to date anyway but wanted to make a new friend and leave the possibility open in the future. I was thinking to invite him out with a group of friends but is that still pursuing?

Possible-Wishbone-49 · 2021-07-28T10:34:53+00:00

I found this sub just last week and already it has proven sooo valuable!! I had a date yesterday with a dude I matched with on Tinder, but I just wasn’t feeling the vibe completely and he made a few jabs that I wasn’t fond of. He paid for our drinks (total ~€25). Fast forward to today I text him and tell him it was nice meeting him but I just didn’t feel the vibe and he responds by asking why and then asking me to pay for half of the bill 😂 Boy byeee

raindropsonnoses · 2021-07-29T20:20:03+00:00

I used to love Rihanna but not so much anymore. She's more of an well-made image, she had the right people beside her to support her, but after Chris Brown and dating billionaires, she ends up with ASAP ROCKY? The term 'Queen' is irresponsibly used these days. Not one of the 'Queens' everyone labels popular artists is actually a good model for behavior and women. Most of these women, end up with deadbeat cheating men and stays with them, or chooses the same type of deadbeat men over and over again.

File-Own · 2021-07-27T17:33:18+00:00

Have any other WOC noticed that white male strangers can be incredibly rude for no reason? How do you handle it?

I was shopping the other day, leaving the store just in front of two groups of people - one of whom had a trolley. A man from the other couple loudly sniggered to his wife "It [the trolley] nearly hit them [me!] Bang!" (This wasn't even what had happened and he was also embarrassing the lady pushing it quite slowly). I called them out on it coldly and they started gaslighting and denying it but I reckon I got my point across, I didn't back down till they were both clearly uncomfortable. Imagine being so ugly, insecure, and with a weirdo complex for violence against women that you loudly imagine out random women you see getting injured.

Yesterday, I was at the cinema alone when a couple walked into the row in front. The girl said, considerately, "I'm worried I might obscure her [my] view." Her male partner then said, loudly, "Oh, it doesn't matter! Ha!" in an incredibly petty way. I wasn't sure if I should challenge him or not as it's a small and barely staffed cinema, with not many other people around.

Why do white men feel so threatened by WOC? I'm young and attractive, as well as petite - not sure if that factors into it or not. Of course everyone can be a dick, but there is a level of privilege/stupidity that comes across in these interactions.

audriannaherself · 2021-07-28T06:49:43+00:00

Does anyone else feel like Simone Biles is being treated with the same racist discrimination as Surya Bonaly was at the 98 Olympics? Yes, the backflip was banned in competition in 1976 but the rationale for that was that it could not be landed on one foot as all other jumps in figure skating require. Bonaly landed her backflip on one foot. It’s like being an exceptionally talented black female athlete is not allowed in some sports. They will just refuse to give you credit for being so much better than the white women.

alsatiandarns · 2021-07-29T02:20:54+00:00

Made the choice to cancel on a trip to go visit a former lover who has so many red flags. Everyone in my life is v proud of me and supportive. Been leaning into the FDS pod heavily and so grateful for it. Recovering pickme making strides!

Mimieuxmieux · 2021-07-29T23:22:12+00:00

I work at a school and one of my close colleagues has found out that someone she used to work with was arrested on child pornography charges. My heart is breaking for her, she was really close to him and clearly respected him (he took over her old role when she moved schools, so she is feeling guilty too.) She is having some denial that maybe he didn't really do it etc. I'm, unfortunately, not surprised by this but I am furious and disgusted by him and have no sympathy.

Eta: I also have feelings for this friend so it is really extra hard because I want to wrap her up and make it better, but I can't! She is in a relationship, could someone please give me tough love on this and slap some sense into me. Thanks!!

Suspicious-Judge-380 · 2021-07-28T12:14:33+00:00

Hiii ladies. Hope everyone is doing good. I’ve been reflecting on my past relationships and i’m wondering if this is a ~nitpick~ or not. whenever my ex would get to my house he’d just text me “i’m here”. now that i’ve found FDS i’ve started to feel like when a man gets to my house to pick me up he should come to the door. is that too much to ask for? i was at my sisters house the other day and her roommates boyfriend came in to get her and i just thought it was so sweet.

Possible-Wishbone-49 · 2021-07-29T15:27:34+00:00

After breaking up with my BF (of almost 7 years) I went straight onto Tinder. Thankfully I found this sub in time and I only had two disappointing dates (one was a total catfish, the other a NVM). Now that my standards are higher I am so done with only dating. It takes sooo much time to weed through all those profiles, damn. Time to just focus on myself and creating opportunities to meet HVM in real life. I already thought of going to a big (& expensive) art show in March with my dad, since he usually gets free tickets from his connections - or could I better go with a friend? Also, any other tips for where to meet those rare HVM?

cantstuntbikerbitch · 2021-07-30T17:58:55+00:00

Doing okay this week and trying to focus on doing better. I am not being ruthless enough, but when I am I am called a bitch or mean by my family or boyfriend, wtf.

Paid off two massive bills and am treating myself to a pedicure as a reward!

Gambit12345 · 2021-07-26T13:47:53+00:00

So I know a guy that I met through friends a couple years ago. I always saw him with this one woman so I assumed he was in a relationship in 2019. I didn’t see him again til this year when everyone started hanging out in a group. One day he invited me out in a group setting. After we all went out I noticed his ex came over at like 3am. I wasn’t entirely sure they dated and thought it interesting. So we hung out a month later and he said yea they dated a few years and broke up 2 years ago. Now they’re friends but it took a long time to get there. And they share a lot of the same friends hence seeing each other at events sometimes. Now this guy has been pursuing me. Taking me on dates, paying everything and such but I wasn’t sure how to navigate the ex thing. As far as I know he doesn’t hang out with her one on one but sees her at mutual friends events. But it was strange she’d come over so late before and I’m pretty sure it was probably a booty call. This was before we started going on dates. I know people who’ve stayed friends with exes but I personally couldn’t do it. I’d probably have to find out more about it but I’m leaning towards not taking this guy seriously I don’t want a guy who might still be hung up on his ex and who will still probably see her due to mutual friends.

Fluffy-Nectarine-567 · 2021-07-28T18:36:56+00:00

What’s a high value and classy way to end a 2 yr long dry spell? I’d be happy to have a short summer fling after all this self-imposed/covid-led celibacy.

warinmymind94 · 2021-07-30T00:58:58+00:00

I was trying to network more and ended up meeting some people that also have the same line of work as I do. rather than giving any of the three of them my number, I gave them my business' social media page instead. the one dude never added me, the woman did and likes and shares my posts, and the other guy added me super fast and started messaging me.

he started complementing my business and products and I started asking him questions about his business model and how he advertises, you know, business stuff. I didn't come off as flirty.

he still had to shoot his shot and used the pretense of looking for business friends / networking to dupe me.

he asked me if I had ever been to this event/con thing for our field, to which I said no. he then started telling me how helpful it is and how worth it is to go. I asked where it was located and said I would look it up. he gave me a vague answer and then, this is where he shoots his shot

"I'm gonna be going there too! we could meetup."

I tell him im not sure I'll go yet. he then said, "well how about we carpool? I dont have a car, you should totally come to my place we could smoke a joint and then you could drive there. I'll even give you gas money."

I was appalled and just ignored him, I should have blocked but honestly just got caught up in my work and other stuff.

a few days later he sent me a photo of him at a different event and then a 2nd photo of the google maps showing the address. it was some weird, low effort thing, I guess he was hoping I would drop what I was doing and quick run over to meetup with him.

he has been blocked since. I didn't even know how to block people from my business page. I am just gonna stick to female friends and supporters from now on.

just ranting LVMs use the freaking dating apps!!! stop coming after women that are working at their jobs and stop hitting up small business owners, I have enough on my plate. if you want to make a good impression BUY MY PRODUCTS. SHARE MY PAGE. LEAVE A good review of my products. thanks.

nouvellecreature · 2021-07-30T16:59:55+00:00

So grateful for FDS. I was able to end a relationship with a LVM and recognize patterns of abuse that have been plaguing my life for years 💖

afab_100 · 2021-07-31T16:33:53+00:00

Will every guy that is alone with you coerce you or are there men with feelings out there?

BusinessTwistofLime · 2021-08-01T07:51:26+00:00

Two questions: 1. Is there ever an appropriate situation where a man can discuss his ex while on a date? 2. Does anyone allow men to touch them on the first date? I have noticed men escalating physical touch (increasing kino) while on a first date. What's a classy/funny response when guys try to escalate touching and you aren't into it?

RecentSprinkles5997 · 2021-08-02T19:00:08+00:00

My 75 year old next door neighbor just hit on me . I feel so angry and gross. My grandfather died recently and I saw him as a grandad like figure in my life I’ve helped him put out his trash cans in the past and he’s been nothing but respectful to me for an entire year up to this point . I want to cry I try to not have a negative opinion of men but stuff like this hurts me deeply

Same-Key-1086 · 2021-07-26T13:55:06+00:00

I just broke up with a boy while we're staying with his extremely high value mother...

The boy and I had been close friends since college, but I'd never been attracted to him and we were often with other people.

We started talking again when I was at a real low point in my life (father died, bird died, best friend died, lost a job I had thought would be my dream job but ended up being totally psychologically stressful, broken up with by a much older guy I had an unhealthy obsession with 🤡, sexually assaulted multiple times in a year, alone in the pandemic, apartment falling apart, the area that I lived in falling apart.) He really wanted to get together and was promising marriage and job opportunities, really supportive of my art, etcetera. I was initially really resistant--I had never been attracted to him and it was a disgusting time to ask someone out!--but I started indulging the fantasy of getting married and having someone to take care of me.

I found fds and started following more fds strategy in the relationship, but it was doomed because I broke the handbook in two big ways: I wasn't attracted to him, and I didn't respect the way he initially "asked me out" (ie, swooping in and promising a future to a platonic friend at her lowest, when I needed friends and didn't feel like I could say no!)

It just felt like the 1800s... my family loved him and was pressuring me to make it work when I was feeling anxious. The relationship was predicated mostly on the promise of providing for me in the future. He was a perfectly nice boy who really admired me and would have been an auspicious suitor during a time period when women were economically dependent on men.

No we're on his family's farm and his mother has scolded him for doing that... she said that I obviously just needed a friend and he wasn't grown up enough to provide me with all of the things he was promising.

I'm glad it happened because I'm so glad to have such a high value woman in my life! She's very supportive of me leveling up and we've been planning my career and the next steps in my life!

He took it pretty hard and got a little cruel, but it's been a great chance to reflect on what I really want out of life. I dont want to ever be in a position where I need a man--financially, logistically, or emptionally--again, and we're making that happen!

One thing that he's said a lot while I'm here is that seeing me interact with the environment makes life feel special again. I really love being alive, I appreciate people, animals, and my surroundings, and I'm an artist. I appreciate that he admires me, but it's a little sad that my hobbies are... doing my hobbies, and his hobby is admiring my hobbies.

I've been reflecting on how men have constructed societies to force women to need them. I think naturally we lead more soulful and fulfilling lives, and they need us to give them meaning. So they've built these institutions and written these social norms just to level the playing field.

But I'm so glad there are women who love other women so much, they'll prioritize sisterhood over their own sons' shot at a relationship. Beautiful.

GiraffeLibrarian · 2021-07-30T18:58:29+00:00

I must have missed the announcement on this, and didn’t want to write an entire separate post. Is there a restriction on uploading a photo for a post? When did that start?

spicybwah · 2021-07-31T11:09:03+00:00

Thanks to you guys I’ve finally blocked my LVM ex. We recently tried to reconnect after being apart for a year and a half, during that time apart there was another woman involved which to this day he still hasn’t removed from social media even though I had asked a few times when we had reconnected. He also didn’t bother trying to win back my trust and knew the effort it required taking, so I called it off. He cried on the phone to me that I was the closest he’d ever gotten to wanting to having a future with someone, and told me he’s going to see the year out single and work on himself. He’s back on the dating apps already not even a month later lol. Blocked. Boy bye.

endorphins_ · 2021-07-31T15:19:02+00:00

Did anyone else here watch the 3 episode Love Is Blind special? Can we talk about how Amber is the epitome of a pick-me/not like other girls? How can you invalidate the experiences Diamond and LC were telling you to defend MARK of all people?

RacePinkBlack · 2021-07-26T15:30:08+00:00

What is everyone's ingredients for their own lip exfoliator? I was thinking brown sugar, honey, and argan oil. I know argan oil is dangerous when swallowed so I'm not sure if that is necessary to include.

i-like-doves · 2021-07-27T17:50:09+00:00

I'm so thankful for this community 💜 Just having a pretty hard time letting go of the anger I have for one particular scrote...though I know it's not productive to waste energy on him. I feel like this sub has definitely helped me mature overall, so thank you, especially mods and everyone who keeps the sub going.

ello-motto · 2021-07-29T17:35:25+00:00

I just saw Lianne V post that she got engaged to Dom. I thought they broke up?! I didn't even know they got back together.

Anyone willing to do an FDS dissection of this? Is she HV or LV for taking him back in this scenario? 🤔 I haven't been following them closely so I can't judge.

ohiomarge79 · 2021-07-31T02:04:46+00:00

I've been online dating for about a month now. I've had 70+ matches that turned into conversations and all but three of the conversations ended for various reasons. Three conversations have been good enough for an exchange of numbers and a prescreening phone call. Out of the phone calls, I've gone on one date with a man who turned out to be pretty low value. I had another offer for a date post- phone call (dinner and drinks) but he didn't follow up about it until the day of, so I declined.

I guess I'm just venting because it feels like a lot of output for very little return and the state of most men these days is just... quite depressing.

Soso3213 · 2021-07-31T15:21:58+00:00

Is r/askfds affiliated with this page? I have been banned for trying to post a question and they keep branding me as male even though I’m female.

Witchery772 · 2021-07-26T17:18:07+00:00

So, I’ve been dating a guy for almost a year. Yesterday I learned that with 2 of his exes, they each had an abortion. I don’t know how to feel actually. When we first started dating I was going through a rough patch. I’m going through divorce with a domestic violence marriage right now on my own in LA. I asked this guy about wearing non latex condoms. Since we already had sex prior without them he said he didn’t want to go back to condoms. ( my apologies as I am a recovering pick me and still learning so much.) I’m 31 years old , and just don’t want to deal with anymore LVM. I really care about this guy. We talk every day, he’s non judgmental and empathetic to my divorce and has been there as a friend. We grew close and I met his parents. Is it wrong for me to feel a little weird about the abortions? He was 22 for the first situation and then 26 for the second situation, both long term girlfriends. I was thinking of even telling him I may want a child at 35 so that’s something to consider. Thanks for your input ladies

rumade · 2021-07-28T16:27:14+00:00

A couple of weeks ago I finally took the plunge and downloaded a dating app. So many scammers on there! People trying to get you to invest in bitcoin. But I had a great date with fantastic conversation on Sunday, and I'm seeing someone tomorrow who comes across well too.

Fingers crossed 🤞

Title	Weekly FDS Chat/ Check-In
Author	Unlikely-Marzipan
Upvotes	59
Comments	153
Date	July 26, 2021 1:32 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/orysnl/weekly_fds_chat_checkin/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/weekly-fds-chat-check-in.795036 https://theredarchive.com/post/795036

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