Came upon this post not a while ago. Shocked and disgusted by the comments. Swipe to see more. Would like to hear your thoughts.

EmirikolWoker · 2022-11-25T07:49:22+00:00

Its amazing how many people turn into bronze-age pro-lifers only when men are the subject of conversation.

These-arent-my-pants · 2022-11-25T10:04:06+00:00

There was a post a few days ago about a woman who abandoned her child and boyfriend for 10 or 15 years and then came back wanting another chance with the posts OP. It was perfectly fine that she wanted to walk away.

VisionarySeagull · 2022-11-25T10:09:48+00:00

Every feminist turns into Ben Shapiro when the topic is men. No matter what the issue, their views immediately take a complete 180 from their progressive and liberal stance into something Shapiro would say.

Condoms cost 35 cents. Contraceptives are completely available in the United States.

Abandoning a child is not the solution to you making bad sexual decisions.

The unsuccessful decision that you made was to have sex and get her pregnant. That decision is not alleviated by you abandoning your child.

All of these are actual Ben Shapiro quotes on abortion, only the last one being edited from "get pregnant" to "get her pregnant." All of these are talking points you see from feminists when a man wants to opt out of fatherhood.

You see, feminists don't hate conservative pundits like Shapiro. They just hate it when he's against their autonomy. If Ben Shapiro talked about a man's responsibility to stick around (as he believes), their rhetoric would be identical.

LordBogus · 2022-11-25T08:29:09+00:00

So when a woman aborts its her choice and she should be able to do it, but if a man decides to not support the child he didnt want, he is not taking responsibility? What about when a woman aborts, doesnt she avoid responsibility?

Double standards much

Ok-Translator2294 · 2022-11-25T08:17:37+00:00

People be like: you need a woman's consent at every stage of sex.

Also people: you ejaculated (consensual or not doesn't matter) that's consent enough, prepare to be a father and pay child support.

That's assuming that the child is his. In this case he was using protection, so chances are that either she sabotaged it or got pregnant by someone else. In my opinion both should be considered as fraud.

ABeeBox · 2022-11-25T10:29:15+00:00

I scoured through the post myself and I'm actually feeling positive with the overall responses. Seems like people are aware of parental fraud, baby trapping, and lack of male reproductive Rights. Genuinely made me feel a little bit warmer in this cold world.

Vioret · 2022-11-25T11:50:46+00:00

Funny how for women it’s “my body my choice.”

But for men it’s “my wallet her choice.”

OctaviaPinfold · 2022-11-25T09:32:33+00:00

People never even consider that a woman making a choice to rather have a kid alone now than later in a family is both an asshole and a selfish move, not to mention seriously irresponsible. No, money and a single mother isn't enough for a kid, especially when that mother isn't even mature enough to think of the future and what the best for children is instead of what she wants right there and then. And why should a man just magically be ready to be a father? That's not a responsibility you can force on people, at least you shouldn't, and that includes financial support, too. There's a massive outcry every time women think becoming a parent may be forced on them while that's a reality for so many men. All this stinks of double standards even with accounting for that only women can get pregnant.

Phantombiceps · 2022-11-25T10:48:33+00:00

I don’t see why you think this is so bad, 5 or 10 years ago this would be 100% man-hating screeching. Now it’s literally 50/50. If anything I was shocked by how many comments there were supporting the guy. More and more people are waking up to the need for men’s reproductive rights

EvidencePlz · 2022-11-25T10:34:44+00:00

I fully support the guy's decision to leave the country. His gf didn't have his consent to give birth to this child. She needs to find a fucking job and support it herself.

Mountainking7 · 2022-11-25T10:46:45+00:00

Rare man W on paying child support.

denvercaniac · 2022-11-25T08:10:08+00:00

That ejaculation comment...Jesus christ. What's next, only women are allowed to orgasm?

needalife94 · 2022-11-25T09:45:27+00:00

I didn't get to read the post. Guessing by the comments , it sounds like a dude getting shit on for not paying for a child he didn't want/wasn't ready for ??

So here is my thing. I'm all for abortions. You're body , your choice. I get that and completely understand and support it. BUT , why is it your body your choice my responsibility? You making a choice about your body should have no financial burden on me. With abortions , women have a way out. So should men. Both parties are EQUALLY responsible for making a child. But only one side has a choice and way out. Financial abortions should be legal for men. Either both sides have a choice or neither sides should have a choice.

mikesteane · 2022-11-25T09:08:53+00:00

If it's his baby.

FH-7497 · 2022-11-25T10:37:13+00:00

I dunno. Most of the commenters you screen shorted were supporting the OP. It’s was like 3 pissy bitches stuck on repeat w the nagging comments. I mean it’s the internet, what do you expect? This was actually somewhat hopeful of a read for me

Cookiedoughjunkie · 2022-11-25T09:58:21+00:00

"it's us hardworking taxpayers who will be responsible if you don't!"

Dude, then blame her, not him. She's the one who had the baby knowing it wasn't going to have a father after explicit conversations about contraceptives AND agreement to abort in the small chance something went wrong

My senses say, if not a fake story, this was intentional. Already small chance for pregernancy (condoms AND birth control) and she gets pregnant... and THEN decides to keep it? That screams intentional.

mododo-bbaby · 2022-11-25T15:39:07+00:00

I wish this man the absolute best. noone should be forced into having a child, and that obviously includes men too. I'm just a bit sad for the kid, with a mother so selfish I'm not sure if they'll have a good childhood

neighborhoodpainter · 2022-11-25T13:51:54+00:00

Hey, the man should be allowed to have his "pro-choice" decision. If women should be allowed pro-choice in deciding if they want to keep the child or not, then a man should be allowed to opt-out of child support for a kid he didn't want.

irrelevantmoniker · 2022-11-25T12:09:12+00:00

It's interesting that all the mandatory fatherhood feminist positions on this amounts to a gender reversed version of "You should have kept your legs closed then shouldn't you slut"

Cause that's what their position sounds like if you flip the genders around, something that conservative pro-birthers have been saying to women for decades.

Lt-Lavan · 2022-11-25T07:49:48+00:00

Ngl, I've heard of and seen through 3rd hand discrimination against men. This was in 1st hand. It was repulsing, genuinely made my headache.

Lightning77Plus · 2022-11-25T10:26:32+00:00

Unfortunate that he had to flee the country for something that he should be well within his rights to do. Why the hell are they suddenly pro-life when the man doesn't want the child?

at--at-- · 2022-11-25T13:53:19+00:00

Financial abortions should be legal. Full stop.

pretendmynameiscool_ · 2022-11-25T08:04:01+00:00

I think we all agree that the best outcome is that both parents are in the picture. However, when it is from consensual sex and both used birthcontrol it means both share the same amount of responsibility for getting to a pregnancy. That means they would also have the same choice in having the baby or not. Ofcourse he can not make her abort it against her will, so then he should also get to not pay child support.

There is countries where this is already a thing. In my county (the Netherlands) you can actually choose as a man to either accept or decline the kid as yours. If you accept you get all the benefits, but also have to support and raise it. If you decline then you have no rights for the child, but also do not have to pay. I think this is as fair as it gets.

He made a good decision and I applaud his family and close friends for supporting him.

LiveIndividual · 2022-11-26T04:03:17+00:00

If women can have an abortion because they are not ready for a child a man should be allowed to walk away as well.

Aimless-Nomad · 2022-11-25T09:05:04+00:00

Typical rules for thee and not for me. Fuck all of these people.

JayMeadows · 2022-11-25T09:42:13+00:00

Oh, man. What a cluster fuck. I hope that dude is OK, though.

holyfuckricky · 2022-11-25T12:27:11+00:00

The first issue here is:

You used protection, presumably the condom style and not the pull out style.

She was on birth control.

How does a little sperm travel outside a condom and into a vagina that is being fumigated for sperm?

Seems really suspicious to me.

lifesuckswannadie · 2022-11-25T12:48:07+00:00

Glad he was able to escape. The system is such bullshit.

Daman_1985 · 2022-11-25T13:05:40+00:00

Last comment was a bullseye.

In the other hand, if the guy just avoided to be with that girl, nothing of that would happened. At least his story coul be a cautionary tale for other men. There are important lessons to learn here.

AlternativeChoice576 · 2022-11-25T16:31:16+00:00

In my opinion if the husband doesn't want the child and wants to abort he should not be entitled to pay her child support

t4r0n · 2022-11-25T11:15:10+00:00

OP should take a paternity test... sounds like she got knocked up by someone else.

A_British_Villain · 2022-11-25T12:06:13+00:00

And P.S, she was always in the relationship to have that baby. She literally used him for this pregnancy. Consciously or unconsciously, her agenda to reproduce was fulfilled.

TekatoZikame2 · 2022-11-25T14:57:56+00:00

He's in the right. It was his "sole decision". He had a right to move, after all it's "his body, his choice" yada yada yada.

Until men get any real rights in this situation, I won't look down on men leaving. It's either that or have your life ruined because a woman would rather act on emotions than think logically.

She's ruining her own life, very likely her child's too (statistics don't lie) and trying to pull the guy into it too.

ABeeBox · 2022-11-25T10:19:59+00:00

I just read the comments as if the context was abortion. I don't think they'd be saying the stuff they said.

KazukiYahashi · 2022-11-25T10:32:50+00:00

Good. It is wrong to force someone into a decision they had no say in, as already pointed out in many of the comments, thankfully.

GrantNexus · 2022-11-25T15:15:07+00:00

Probably some other guy's kid.

frostmorefrost · 2022-11-25T13:09:43+00:00

i'm a dude here and i agree with OP on this.

hir gf made a unilateral decision to force OP into something he didnt agree on. he did man up by not accepting a responsibility hendidnt want or was ready for.

if you people think he should man up,then you man up and take over.

they each have a say in this, any unilateral decision made and the consequences that comes after, should and must be borne by the party who made it.

HonestSetting1105 · 2022-11-25T14:52:28+00:00

“Woman lied about birth control and tricked man into having baby. Man doesn’t want baby that he didn’t consent to and woman forces him to have. Man flees o avoid injustice and financial hell. Man is bad because woman tricked him and man needs o take responsibility”- Feminists

DamagedGoods_17 · 2022-11-25T14:56:06+00:00

Lmao im waging war for this man's rights and i dont care who shames me for it.

secret_tiger101 · 2022-11-25T15:40:18+00:00

The chances of an accidental pregnancy on birth control pills and condoms (which is implied here) is very very very very very low.

Oppai_Dragon6996 · 2022-11-25T13:58:48+00:00

It's always 'my body my choice' for women until it comes to child support. Then it is "Your wallet my money." If a man doesn't want to be father to a child before the birth of the child but woman decide to go for having the kid, he should not be held responsible for the kid.

CawlinAlcarz · 2022-11-25T15:46:34+00:00

The whole thing about the male avoiding his responsibility also applies to the female who chose to have the child knowing there would not be any financial support from the father.

We have allowed women to avoid their share of responsibility for generations. The sooner people and society start thinking about actual EQUALITY in this regard, the less these situations would happen.

PoisonLotus40 · 2022-11-25T10:41:31+00:00

Just read that post and didn’t bother reading the comments, glad I didn’t.

HistoricalSomewhere3 · 2022-11-25T12:43:28+00:00

That’s fucked up. Though I hope OP will eventually be a part of that kids life, because no kid deserves a life without a father, I also hope he gets better say in the future matters and is able to return to his home eventually

1976Tom · 2022-11-25T23:25:43+00:00

He had a responsibility to himself. He looked out for his best interest. She knew this was a possibility when she made her decision. It is what it is.

AzureVoltic · 2022-11-25T07:52:41+00:00

Nornalizeabortions

Chaegorath · 2022-11-25T12:19:58+00:00

I find it pretty amazing that these people believe others have to take the consequences of one's actions, honestly. I take it, they'd be happy to go to prison for vehicular manslaughter because the person who's car they sat in ran someone over. After all, it their choice to get in their car - and accidents can always happen.

It's insane how it's not "her body, her choice" anymore if it comes to the consequences of said choices. I think there needs to be some legal thing to waive all your rights to the child. No reconsidering and trying to get custody, no visitation, no "but muh child, want connect" - something that permanently waives any and all connection outside of the accidental biological one that then also waives any form of responsibility for it. Society is dumb.

RecoveringCoomer · 2022-11-25T14:17:56+00:00

That's what I say: If consent to sex is consent to parenthood, then women don't abortions after consensual sex either. If consent to sex is not consent to parenthood, therefore women have the right to choose -without asking the father- to abort the baby or keep the baby, men should also have the right to legally and financially abort the kid, and let her provide for the baby she wants to keep.

Giving all the choices to women without any responsibility, but all the responsibilities and none of the choices to men is not fair.

If it is "my body my choice" when it comes to a woman making a decision about keeping or aborting the baby, it is "my money my choice" when it comes to child support.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoudH-RPnEE

guardian416 · 2022-11-25T16:40:17+00:00

Men are forced to pay because society cannot bare the responsibility of children that women have. It’s another example of men having a disproportionate responsibility in society. Same as going to war or working dangerous labor jobs. It all goes back to the idea that men are cannon fodder.

whiteinrice · 2022-11-25T09:12:41+00:00

Sounds to me like a perfectly legal financial abortion. I guess they are not too happy when its the man that wants to abort. While we are on the topic, women don't actual enjoy aborting babies, working, and sleeping around. They enjoy rubbing mens faces in the fact its THEIR CHOICE, they are quite happy to literally tear themselves down in the name of "you tell me I cannot do it, so I do it".

A_British_Villain · 2022-11-25T12:03:44+00:00

Yeah if we flip the script on this to maintain equality, the man should have the right to insist on her having an abortion.

OP is effectively running away from a country with legalised rape.

sekametelisoppa · 2022-11-25T15:39:16+00:00

So the girl raped him?

Told him she was on bc and then got pregnant? She raped him

Mi-Infidel · 2022-11-25T16:59:29+00:00

“We were both using birth control” paternity test may have absolved him of responsibility but it sounds like she was trapping him. Good on him for living his life. Trapping wouldn’t be a thing if men had more control over the situation. Women can find all kinds of ways to force men into situations…

DecimatingDarkDeceit · 2022-11-25T14:23:47+00:00

'' I always used protection '' ~~ Oh boy ! Whose going to tell the [ ^huge ] probability that the 'child' could not even be his ?! Thank goodness this dude has Good, Well mannered and benign parents to help him out and lend him good advice.

Also Screw that absolutely abhorrent and repulsive commentator on the 3rd pic, those types of bstards are quite likely see men as nothing but chattle / serfs that has to serve the needs; or a tradcuck

Gpda0074 · 2022-11-25T15:09:35+00:00

If she can kill it, I should be able to abandon it. Dave Chapelle put it best.

derrekvandeusen54 · 2022-11-25T10:48:21+00:00

Those comments are rather ironic

TipiTapi · 2022-11-25T11:33:43+00:00

There were plenty of comments supporting OP.

I was suprised how many.

wrekd · 2022-11-25T15:56:11+00:00

Morality aside, all relationships should be voluntary. Love, support, time and commitment should be free to be given or rescinded at any point. Government cannot be trusted to not make decisions that directly support and increase goverment's own power and influence.

That being said, most people raised responsibly will make the responsibe choice. Or the human race would have died out long ago. Most men are not monsters. Nor are they goverment issued work slaves and income augmentors.

ThePrettyBeebz · 2022-11-25T16:08:09+00:00

I’ve always said that a man should be able to opt out of fatherhood if the woman chooses to keep the pregnancy against his wishes. End all be all, it’s her decision to keep/terminate, but that also means it’s her decision to raise the child alone if he chooses to bow out. The hard part is figuring out timing of when he can walk away. Before birth only? Up to a certain point after the birth? That’s the only difficult point in my mind.

rcorum · 2022-11-25T18:18:49+00:00

Shout out to u/Lt-Lavan

One hell of a point.

Planthandler · 2022-11-25T18:19:39+00:00

If it’s the woman’s rights to decide what happens to her body then logically it should be the man’s choice if he wants to participate in that or not. A valid argument could be made against abortion if a man is forced to provide as well. Equality.. abortion is ending a developing life that would develop into a viable human so if that’s a choice then money should be as well

Meow121325 · 2022-11-25T20:47:05+00:00

I would have asked for a paternity test

f41c10 · 2022-11-25T23:05:08+00:00

BABY TRAP.

blackdahlialady · 2022-11-25T23:23:34+00:00

I hate to say this but I don't blame him. If women can opt out of parenthood by abortion then men should be able to do the same thing. Of course financially and physically. I bet she thought she would be able to force him to stay in her life if she has his kid.

Watch her try to get him for child support when she realizes she won't be able to convince him to stay together after the birth. That's how that would have gone, I'm pretty much 100% sure. If she had wanted an abortion and he didn't want her to, of course she would have been told to get one anyway. The misandry is real.

Dry-Sheepherder-8432 · 2022-11-26T00:16:55+00:00

That baby wasn’t his….

ThrowAway29307845034 · 2022-11-26T02:23:05+00:00

Notice how fuckin' bitches in western countries have such gigantic bigotry about what the consequences of sex are for whom depending on what genitals you have?

If a woman fucks, well, she can have an abortion, or not, and be a parent or not, whatever....she's got a pussy!

If a man fucks, he better agree with whatever a woman wants or he goes to prison.

Fleeing slavery is always justified.

SaintNick1943 · 2022-11-26T02:23:43+00:00

His ex should b the only one getting shit.she decided to keep a baby she knew she wouldn't be able to take care of, and he, rather than allowing his life to go down the drain, decided to jump ship. To be honest, she shouldn't be allowed to have that kid- it's unfair to the kid who will have to grow up without any real shot at life because his mother didn't want to plan her parenthood and instead decided to irresponsibly unleash a new life into the world knowing full and well the necessary conditions for it to have a decent life were not there. This would be the case even if he decided to trash his life to lessen the personal costs to her. She is the irresponsible one. No child should have to grow up like that and no man should be forced to be party to such irresponsibility and cruelty. I only hope she aborted it after all once she realized he left.

foreverstudent8 · 2022-11-26T03:05:14+00:00

That guy is my hero

RedditProudGuy · 2022-11-28T01:38:18+00:00

I'm the OP in the mentioned post. Thank you for sharing my story and all the support you guys have given me.

ayroxus94 · 2022-11-25T12:19:09+00:00

If she’s not responsible enough to respect his decision then she is certainly not responsible enough to raise a child.

peasey360 · 2022-11-25T12:50:02+00:00

That last comment was on point. I nearly had this happen with a girl I trusted, we did everything to prevent pregnancy but she still said “if it was yours I’d keep it”. Totally shattered my trust and we broke up 2 months later.

WingsofSky · 2022-11-25T13:53:05+00:00

Sounds like that woman sabotaged the contraception/condoms. He shouldn't have to take responsibility for something she did on her own.

He used protection. She did something to get pregnant. How is it his fault?

nooneinteresting-1 · 2022-11-25T14:31:40+00:00

How tf am I supposed to date a women after reading another horror story ? I guess I just keep walking MGTOW path.

2022-11-25T12:54:22+00:00

So they both agreed on not having a baby, she did the lady equivalent of stealthing, and people are mad when he doesn’t want any part of it?

I bet these same ladies are the ones who get furious at pro lifers. “You chose to risk having a baby when you consented to sex,” is something they only want to hear in the context of it benefiting them.

LolUWhut · 2022-11-25T21:11:46+00:00

“Dude here and this is not cool” lmao. Just a bunch of fucking kids who have no idea what real life is like. I always have a good laugh reading the comments on most of the posts on AITA and such subreddits.

This post was just sad. That fact that op had to move out of country due to something he had no control over is what’s disgusting about this world.

Andrew__IE · 2022-11-25T21:55:39+00:00

Weird to think that leaving your home country, leaving your friends your family, and your goals and dreams is one of the few options you have as a man not ready to raise a child.

They had discussions about it, they both consented, they had plans for this, and she still went to have the baby after saying she didn’t want to. She had a change of heart, sure, but the man didn’t and it is unfair for men to be expected to care for a child they did not want to end up having in the first place.

AdviceYouNeed4Real · 2022-11-25T18:20:29+00:00

Your body, your choice. You chose to leave the United States.

Seems legit.

Sounds like a paternity test should be in there somewhere.

Preform_Perform · 2022-11-25T19:25:49+00:00

Yeah get that bread, gamer!

Starski09 · 2022-11-25T19:44:45+00:00

Most of these people likely have never had the sex and are so desperate to be liked they take on views that don't necessarily make sense.

susshoppinglist · 2022-11-25T20:16:12+00:00

Bro never I SAY NEVER trust a girl saying she is taking the pills. Also, and this goes for all the single guys(15-25) in this community, stop looking for a girlfriend. I mean, are you really so desperate for attention? Stay consistent on what you're doing and focus on building your dreams. If you lay your happiness and mental health on a bitch you fucked up.

themastodon85 · 2022-11-26T01:40:58+00:00

My guess is the kid ain't his anyway. He says they used protection every time and she claimed she was on the pill. She probably cheated and didn't use protection and wants the kid to be his so she can use it to trap him.

Hyuxnie · 2022-11-28T18:13:23+00:00

Okay so this might come off as a little biased since I personally do not want kids myself but after rereading that post(read it once or twice before) I am completely on OPS’s side and I don’t get why people are bashing him. He wore protection, if it was a case where he went raw, ok then that would be different but he took the necessary steps to PREVENT her from getting pregnant and she ended up being that 1%. He then informed her that he does not want kids at the moment but she didn’t listen yet everyone in that comment section expects him to “man up” and raise a kid he didn’t want? Like I said it would be a completely different story if he didn’t use protection and wanted to dip but he DID that’s the point he did. I literally read a a comment of a imbecile saying “you chose to not wear protection…” then when someone pointed out to the idiot that he did he quickly switched up and said “you chose to have sex” okay? If someone is having sex with a condom… I don’t think their goal is to create a baby so the argument is invalid but whatever. Anyway, like I said it was her choice ti have this child knowing that he didn’t want it so she’s stuck with it, why are people mad because he wants to live his life childfree when he didn’t want it in the beginning? I’m not saying peer pressure her to have an abortion but people trying to guilt trip him and telling him to step up completely baffle me considering they know 1. He used protection and 2. He didn’t want the kid and told her from the beginning, it’s not like he went along with it and told her last minute no he told her from the beginning and she made the choice to keep it so that’s on her.

IdcImSpeakingFacts · 2022-11-25T15:27:39+00:00

When a man and a woman have sex, they both consent to potentially becoming parents. In America, I find it hypocritical that only women are able to opt out of parenthood. I also find it disturbing that a woman can kill the fathers baby if he wants to keep it and she doesn't. Have yall seen videos of men begging and crying for their wife or girlfriend not to kill the child? Tragic.

ThrowawayGhostGuy1 · 2022-11-25T11:47:28+00:00

I’m shocked there were any comments defending the innocent man.

UniversalCraftsman · 2022-11-25T11:58:32+00:00

There you see that equal age relationships don't work at a large scale, there was a reason my grandfather was 20 years older than my grandmother. I am currently 25 and I can't imagine having to raise a kid until 35.

Naru4odo · 2022-11-25T12:48:41+00:00

It's hilarious, this is literally the same arguments they don't want men to use. Oh you had sex, you should be ready to accept the consequences even though you spoke about not having kids, you should accept the consequences. Now let's flip that, oh you got sexually assaulted in the club, damn, you shouldn't have worn that whore uniform and got all that unwanted attention, you should be ready to accept the consequences once you put on clothes that are that revealing. See how that sounds fuxked up? If one is victim blaming, the other should be as well.

Jukingku22 · 2022-11-25T13:08:11+00:00

Wow. OP pls screenshot this and put it in your favorites in photo albums. This is an absolute perfect example of the raw double standard society has against men.

UnconventionalXY · 2022-11-25T13:21:20+00:00

Womens rights are: her body, her choice. Mens rights are: her body, his responsibility.

Women require consent to have sex, and a man is guilty of raping a woman if he violates that consent agreement, yet men don't get to consent about having children and thus it isn't considered rape to violate an agreement not to have children.

Men require equal rights over consent. Without equal rights and the support of the law, men have to take their own steps to protect themselves from being raped, including leaving the country. Self defense is not a crime, else women would be in prison for using contraception to protect themselves.

Digitaldreamer7 · 2022-11-25T14:21:23+00:00

See,

ALWAYS hide your condoms, if YOU have no chain of custody on your contraception, you don't have sex.
Always pull out, even with a condom.
Always dispose of the condom and the baby batter within, yourself.
No children til you are married. If you're not married, children should be discussed as a medical problem that needs to be rectified.

DontHugMeImBanned · 2022-11-25T16:48:21+00:00

I don't choose to crash when I get into the car even though I know it's a possibility. If I was just the passenger, I didn't crash the car .

Consent is for men too. Your body, your choice. My wallet, my time , my choice.

HinduProphet · 2022-11-25T17:02:03+00:00

Giga Chad move :

Take the child away with you to another country (away from the mother) where it is much more affordable to raise them.

Motherhood is a privilege and it is high time women are made to understand that.

Led-Rain · 2022-11-25T17:44:19+00:00

Not a single person pointed out the possibility she cheated on him. But from the tone of op post it seems they didnt always use protection.

az226 · 2022-11-25T23:10:22+00:00

Consent to sex does not include consent to keeping a pregnancy from his sperm and fatherhood.

dukesaces · 2022-11-26T00:11:22+00:00

I will never ever support women's right to abortion until society legalizes and supports a man's right to paper abortions and not paying child support.

I think abortion should be legal and it should be a woman's choice but i refuse to support it while men are denied the same option.

Ok_Principle_1926 · 2022-11-26T02:21:54+00:00

As a woman and a feminist, I agree with the dude. He is entirely in his rights to walk away from a situation he didn’t want to begin with and took all the precautions to avoid. If she wanted to keep the baby regardless of his decision not to, then he should be void of responsibility. I don’t see why this is even a conversation.

SpookeyClown · 2022-11-25T11:47:03+00:00

As sympathetic as I may be to this man's plight and while I don't conden what this woman did at all, I don't support the idea of abandoning the child. I think abortions are fucked up and women shouldn't have that choice either. It really comes down to the wellbeing of the child taking priority to me. The last thing we need is another child brought up fatherless by a poor single mother on welfare. The dood really should get a DNA test though.

Not that anyone cares for my opinion, but there it is.

PizzaDelivery313 · 2022-11-25T09:02:41+00:00

link to original post?

RealButterchu · 2022-11-25T15:02:23+00:00

If this was a woman talking about how she killed the child she’d be applauded for it. I can even see some common pro-life arguments being used against the man that they would be disgusted seeing used towards an abortion story lol

apx_rbo · 2022-11-25T16:15:02+00:00

Just saw this post not too long ago. The comments are pretty split on whether or not it was a good idea but many people have pointed out that they both agreed to wait before having kids and he had no say in whether he wanted to be a father or not. I think it's weird that some people are defending the baby trap-ish look of it all but it's also probably just attachment on her part, the way a mother is supposed to feel.

MensEquality · 2022-11-25T16:59:17+00:00

A country that has no patronage to half its people (has turned against men) is one that no longer exists based on equal justice for all.

ZekalMacabre · 2022-11-25T17:04:54+00:00

There were some good points there in defense of OP. But when you're in a sub filled with pathetic simps who have the critical thinking ability of a feminist, your points can be the best in the world, they'll just ignore them anyway and double down on the stupid.

McFeely_Smackup · 2022-11-25T19:45:50+00:00

Liberal women become shockingly anti-choice when it's a man who doesn't want to be a father. They even use the EXACT same arguments that pro-life people use to oppose abortion.

It's also ironic that the people who hold up single motherhood as perfectly normal, acceptable, and healthy for the child, turn 180 degrees when the father exercises his "choice".

icefire54 · 2022-11-25T22:21:49+00:00

Based OP. Hope he's doing alright now.

Long-Review-1861 · 2022-11-25T10:56:46+00:00

Which sub?

Strohiem · 2022-11-25T15:25:36+00:00

I’m pro life so I believe he has a responsibility to raise that child, but it goes both ways. He has a responsibility and so does she, if they really can’t they should put the child up for adoption. This shouldn’t be a rights question, it should be a moral one. Both men and women need to be better about taking responsibility in this situation. Not taking anyone’s side

phoenix_shm · 2022-11-25T13:46:28+00:00

This makes me wonder if legal agreements to not support raising a child are constitutionally lawful... If they agreed to it and had signed a legal document...and/or made a video recording stating as much...hhmmm... Also, it reminds me Americans as bargaining chips in the geopolitical poker game with Russia...

Oz70NYC · 2022-11-25T19:40:09+00:00

I could see the reaction he's getting if the pregnancy was planned, but he CLEARLY states he was wearing protection that failed. So the conception of this child was an accident. By that VERY definition, a woman has the option to decide to keep or terminate (or at least she did before Roe v. Wade was overturned) the pregnancy. But a man is forced to be obligated to a child he never wanted in the 1st place? BULLSHIT.

But let's flip the script. Same scenario, but the mother wants to terminate and the father wants to keep it. Guess what? SAME RESULT...the father has no say. Even if he is of sound enough character to raise the child...if she doesn't want to bare it for 9 months, she doesn't have to.

In any scenario...we have zero reproductive rights in this country. When we don't want to be fathers, we're forced into it. When we want to be fathers, we're told we can't be if the mother doesn't want us to be. And OF COURSE we can be forced to be fathers of kids not even ours on the word of the mother alone. PROTECT YOUR SEED, GENTLEMEN.

sabazurc · 2022-11-26T00:26:37+00:00

Just like I do not think abortions are ok, I do not think avoiding financial responsibilities is ok when it comes to kids. But for those who demand that abortion should be allowed...you can't blame this guy.

So in conclusion, this guy is an ahole in my eyes but vast majority of people criticizing him are hypocrites.

Spare_Development615 · 2022-11-26T00:40:33+00:00

If there's an unwanted baby, who's paying for that?

The public, the taxpayers, including you.

The public is also paying for neonatal and delivery for indigent parents.

The public is paying for abortions.

Hell the public is paying for free condoms in schools and birth control pills.

So yeah

You're already "paying for it" indirectly thru taxes, quantitative easing and inflation.

There's no such thing as consequence-free sex.

Even without STD's you're sharing germs and fluids that can have adverse health effects.

Abortion is hard on a woman's body, sometimes people even die from complications.

Women can lose their fertility from it.

The NeoLiberal ideological stack is a failure on multiple levels.

Free love, free this, free that, comes at a cost.

Social costs, economic costs, etc etc.

There's no such thing as a free lunch.

victorsredditkonto · 2022-11-25T13:47:12+00:00

Think you're a coward if you abandon your kids

IggyG6174 · 2022-11-25T20:34:43+00:00

Am I misunderstanding something or did op not say that she said she was on birth control?

djc_tech · 2022-11-26T01:48:30+00:00

I agree with all of their statements. He knew the risks, he knew that having sex coins lead to pregnancy, he has a responsibility to be an adult and weight said risks and he’s responsible.

That being said…these are the same arguments used against having abortions. So by that token she’s just as responsible and abortions shouldn’t be allowed because she knew said risks.

This is unless….women aren’t capable of self agency and are incapable of evaluating said risks and therefore shouldn’t be held accountable. So which one is it? Are they two consenting adults that made a decision and they should stick to it and raise the kid - both of them? Or is it only women are absolved of responsibility and allowed to terminate pregnancies at will?

OatBlender · 2022-11-26T02:09:53+00:00

Man I'm pro life the 10 yards, this guy's a pos

white_waves · 2022-11-25T13:47:46+00:00

Curious what would the thoughts here be if the woman was in a state where abortion was illegal (or the ridiculously short timeline was over) and there was no way to get an abortion.

SnooBeans6591 · 2022-11-25T11:02:54+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Royal_Eagle_svk · 2022-11-25T15:24:36+00:00

Where did u go?

PetiteUnicornFound · 2022-11-25T19:40:32+00:00

If a “man” decides to not participate in the upbringing of his biological child, whether it be, financially, physically or emotionally. I support their decision, wholeheartedly! Signing Over Parental Rights, is a legal way to avoid the responsibilities. Spending money, to relocate etc instead of receiving appropriate legal counsel or set up child support payments, that are fair and based off of your income… is, I’m sorry, but it’s pa7hetic 🤷🏽‍♀️.

I have a family member that pays $67 A MONTH!! For his child.

I sincerely applaud this young man for being realistic, for his self-awareness and his capabilities or lack there of. There are soooo many children that would have been better off, if their father’s had his courage. Sometimes being an absent father is better than being a terrible father…. His absence is a kindness, to the mother and child!

Kairu101 · 2022-11-25T23:53:46+00:00

Whilst I agree with the sentiment on it's face, there does seem to be a double standard here.

bipartisanmaniac · 2022-11-26T01:47:42+00:00

I’m pro life, so I believe OP should have to face the consequences of his actions.

However,

women have long had the ability to opt out of parenthood at any point along the pregnancy path regardless of the father’s wishes. So he’s fighting fire with fire.

TheGamecockNurse · 2022-11-26T02:16:35+00:00

So I guess I’m going to have an unpopular opinion here but the original poster is a dirt bag. I’m a guy. I’m pro-life, I’m pro Dad and I’m pro Family.

This guy represents everything I am against. He wanted to take no responsibility for an action that has major consequences. The day he returns to the USA for any reason she should serve his ass with back child support.

justadogdontblameme · 2022-11-25T09:00:58+00:00

Begging her to kill the child is so damn cringe. moving to a different country, yeah that’s just weird. But if women have that sole decision wether or not to keep the baby men should be able to opt out. That’s only fair. However everyone knows that contraception isn’t 100% reliable, every time you have sex there’s a risk of pregnancy, even if you don’t ejaculate precum can get a woman pregnant, Hell I’ve heard stories of women who had their tubes tied getting pregnant, it’s rare but it happenes. And then there’s stories of children surviving abortion. If you have sex you need to be ready to deal with the consequences of a baby. That’s all there is to it.

Edit: funny how i can say men should have the right to opt out if women have that right, but saying we should have personal responsibility for our actions(and i mean we as in men and women) and people don’t like that one bit.

johnslegers · 2022-11-25T14:35:45+00:00

He's selfish for not caring about the kid he spawned.

But it still pales in comparison with all those women who support aborting a fetus when the father wants to keep it...

When did blatant hypocrisy become the norm?

cacamalaca · 2022-11-25T13:31:57+00:00

I think it's a bad decision on his part. Countries outside the reach of US jurisdiction tend to be shitholes.

sameoldname1982 · 2022-11-26T03:55:14+00:00

You are a pile of shit asshole. First you want to murder your child for convenience resins now you what to run away

SpookeyClown · 2022-11-25T10:51:43+00:00

[permanently deleted]

regrus · 2022-11-25T13:50:13+00:00

I mean...I get the point of this post, but dude said he always wears a condom yet here we are. Regardless of birth control or not...if you don't want a kid keep the rubber on. You want your 2mins of extra pleasure go ahead, but you're responsible for that kid.

akmvb21 · 2022-11-25T19:18:09+00:00

I'm in the minority opinion on this subreddit that it is both a man's and woman's responsibility to raise a child if they become pregnant. I'm against all forms of trying to get out of that responsibility. I acknowledge that it's unfair that women currently have ways out of it that are not afforded to men, but I advocate for eliminating those, not allowing men to also get out their responsibilities.

Ok_Razzmatazz_1751 · 2022-11-25T13:34:06+00:00

Lol , wanting to leave the country cause he can't afford the average child support payment of $436.00 a month.

His parents could of helped. What a great family support system. sarcasm

Adorable_Collar_9694 · 2022-11-25T19:24:41+00:00

Sounds like a dumbass. There are consequences for ever action. I’m not having intercourse sex with anyone till I’m ready to have kids.

mattmilli0pics · 2022-11-25T12:46:31+00:00

Yea his fault for going raw. You never trust these hos. I know the feeling of being trapped and it’s not great however when that baby is born if you miss out on that you will be so sorry later in life.

bluehorserunning · 2022-11-25T11:58:49+00:00

Convinced himself she'd abort if she got pregnant, stealthed with the condom, freaks out when it turns out he was wrong.

Birdflower99 · 2022-11-25T07:55:01+00:00

Had he chosen to be a present father he might not have had to pay any child support. He avoided all parenting responsibilities for an innocent child so that part I personally feel is pretty low. It’s true that women get to choose so men should be able to too. But the fact is he had sex and brought a child into the world. And now that child grows up potentially fatherless.

pennywise1235 · 2022-11-25T13:30:44+00:00

While I agree with the sentiment expressed in regards to the male being able to up and leave, especially in light of the female right to abort without any consequences from the male biological parent, this is a tired argument and the reactions from those on this post are not new. Do what you feel is right gents, but understand what society will say and perceive you as.

PentaxPaladin · 2022-11-25T13:39:35+00:00

Well I mean we(religious nutjobs)did take away a woman's right to have an abortion in a lot of places in the usa which is where this happened so idk what point you were trying to make there at the end.

Shreddersaurusrex · 2022-11-25T14:42:12+00:00

Yeah so this is one reason there should be more options for male birth control. RISUG is one form that I’m looking to get.

Most of the onus is on women. Couples should use multiple forms of birth control on a regular basis because life is constantly trying to beat the odds.

I understand his concerns but I don’t agree with his actions.

I’m also a little worried that his partner may have wanted to get pregnant. Sometimes ppl sabotage their birth control or that of their partner(s).

elebrin · 2022-11-25T14:54:38+00:00

This is an example of why casual sex cannot exist, and sex should only happen in a committed, trusting marriage where things are planned out ahead, trust is rock solid and well-earned, and the the possibility of a child coming into being are prepared for. I don't mean planning for an abortion, but planning for an actual child. If you aren't ready or capable of that, then you probably shouldn't be having sex.

cuppa_tea_4_me · 2022-11-25T15:33:38+00:00

They are a piece of shit. Mother is as well. I would have stayed in the country and fought for custody.

AzureVoltic · 2022-11-25T09:20:04+00:00

Nah, those comments are right. The issue here is not that a man has no way to opt out of parenthood; it's that women do have the option to "opt out of parenthood" aka kill their baby. Consenting to sex is also consenting to any known risks associated with it. Sex exists for the purpose of making babies, so you shouldn't be suprised when you have sex and make a baby. No matter how many precautions you take, it doesn't excuse you from being responsible for the outcome. This is not a men's rights issue.

AzureVoltic · 2022-11-25T08:51:38+00:00

[permanently deleted]

vanduychr · 2022-11-25T16:55:49+00:00

I dont know this is a tough topic. Part of me says if women can abort men should have the same option to choose to not be part of the childs lif and financially abort. The other part of me say protection isnt 100% and you need to accept the consequences.....

What i do know is leaving the country is just a temporary fix. In 15 uears when you have another family and they want to take a family trip there could be a warrent on you for unpaid child support.

So as far as running, with the laws inplace today i dont think that will solve anything and just make it worse for future you. Do i think the laws need to change to allow men to choose abortion duringnthe same period shes able to yes, but we arnt there yet. Even if its a unfair time table like a contract even before having sex letting each other know each others intentions there should be a way in situations like this when a conversation was had where he should be able to back out

nineteenletterslong_ · 2022-11-25T16:59:04+00:00

does anybody know youtuber gus johnson? i've been considering posting about his story as it relates to the theme very well but i don't think he'd appreciate to be associated with this place. does anyone have any thoughts on this?

combs1945a · 2022-11-25T19:25:45+00:00

Why is it if you are a woman you get to choose to be a parent but if you are a man you don't get that choice? If he forced her to get pregnant and carry the child to term he would be jailed, but she is not? Why is it if you are a women who can't afford her children she gets help by the state, but if you are a man who can't afford you children you get put in the state? If this woman fled Iran so she would not be literally forced to have this child, most people would applied her. However if she is a man, and is forced the leave the country so he is not forced to be a partner he is a bad person?

Mr_Joguvaga · 2022-11-25T19:30:24+00:00

Are tvese ppl just ignoring the fact that they used protection to?? Like i know there are like 1 or 2% chance to get a kid but its still higher ods than what ever it is without protection. Something feels off with the fact that they used protection, did someone do something to the condoms or pills?

Any way if they had a prrvious agreement to not become parents AND took the necisary precautions to not become AND she still got pregnant AND she choose to keep it even tho he doesnt want to be a father, he can leave its her right to keep it ots his to leave it.

CuntyMcFuckballs69 · 2022-11-25T19:39:28+00:00

It's a situation where doing the right thing would destroy your life

Many_Temperature2116 · 2022-11-25T19:40:21+00:00

Gotta love the “man up” thing

3DNZ · 2022-11-25T20:29:04+00:00

Did OP get a paternity test to establish if he is in fact the father? I would have demanded that before uprooting my life

Crowfasa · 2022-11-25T22:57:42+00:00

The worst is all the people against the guy arguing that once the child is born both parents have a responsibility to it despite the fact that safe haven laws/adoption exist. I bet they'd be pissed if someone tried to get safe haven laws repealed despite that making things more equal.

KochiraJin · 2022-11-26T01:13:19+00:00

IIRC condoms are about 80% effective and birth control is something like 99% effective and on top of that the chance of pregnancy for a woman her age is about 25% per month. So that's what 0.05% chance of pregnancy per month? That's quite the rare occurrence he encountered.

thegrumpypanda101 · 2022-11-26T01:26:06+00:00

Bro she either lied about her birth control or it failed somehow since it's not 100%.

BenitoCamelas69420 · 2022-11-26T01:32:51+00:00

You can still put a child Support claim

BootyBreakerDeluxe · 2022-11-26T02:33:49+00:00

Yea fuck all of that. He told her he wanted nothing to do with it. That was her cue to leave him alone. I will never trust women when it comes to pregnancy because When shit like this happens and the guy does not want it, he is ALWAYS the bad guy. Having kids is pointless anyways.

thenowhereman__ · 2022-11-26T03:31:09+00:00

Went through a similar thing except I wasn't in a relationship with the girl and I don't remember having sex with her. It was the worst thing that's ever happened to me.

Night_Panda95 · 2022-11-26T06:27:20+00:00

Fleeing the country to not pay child support... Not cool. One, that child is a human being who deserves to be taken care of and loved. Take a second to step outside yourself and see perspective from the kids point of view. They're in a pretty shit situation based on decisions being made by both parties. They didn't choose that, it's the hand being dealt to them. Two, you can't change biology, kid is your blood, you contributed 50% to making em when you made the decision to have sex. That doesn't make this insignificant just because of the natural consequence following sex. Three, contraceptives are never risk free, if you were that worried about getting pregnant as a couple then why not take on some of the responsibility to stop it, like male birth control if you think you're lady isn't taking theirs properly. Real equality has prevention from both sides. Four, more on the biology side, similar to how men will always be stronger than women, women will always have the womb to bear children. We don't decide how our species came to fruition nor the components each person has so stop being butt hurt that it's reality. This is equally said to any women bitching about men being stronger and taking away opportunities from them. Biology cannot be a factor in rate of opportunity as it's not a changeable influence but a constant. Five, taking a step back to what is actually being debated here... Right to make decisions about ones personal body vs. right to make decisions about ones personal finances. In my opinion the "right" that people refer to doesn't exist. The government can go into your accounts and freeze them or force you to pay stuff, or downright just take your money and line their pockets. The government can also change laws that take away access to abortions, people come up and do whatever they want regardless of your personal space, when you get older or just live with mental health your independence and right just "naturally" gets taken away the more crazy you go, from putting you to bed at 6 to controlling where you take your person and what you do with it even if you're still mentally sound. Looking at another angle, consequence of not having your body respected or your finances respected. Finances rule the world, you can't do anything without money, which is why researchers are naming financial stability as being before the importance of shelter and food. Not having your body respected, right to choose if you want to have a baby, to consent to others touching you medically and intimately, etc. Time and time again we are taught oppression is bad and freedom is the only way. So it would seem to me that not having the right to both would be detrimental. The inevitable impasse, of which my partner and I thought up a potential plan. However like any theory, kinks not fully worked out. Plan: Currently in my country most abortion clinics will not abort past roughly 3-4 months depending on location. You can only abort past this date for serious medical reasons such as death if not aborting. The government doesn't let you abort beyond 5 months 6 days for safety risks to the carrier. Assuming this law is still in effect, the following is proposed, Couple gets pregnant, they have 3 months to decide if they want to have the child. If any party chooses to opt out of all financial responsibility they have to do so before 3 months. Opting out of financial responsibility also opts you out of being a parent. In other words you give up parental rights and so are not allowed to change your mind years later when you suddenly want a relationship with your long lost child. If both parties opt out, abortion occurs. If guy opts out but girl chooses to keep, she is 100% responsible for said child. If girl opts out, guy chooses to keep, he is 100% responsible for said child. Now, in this case the guy who chooses to keep child would have to pay for all medical birth related costs and healthcare. This includes cost of "renting said womb" till child is born. To get estimates for this it would fall in line with surrogate expenses, roughly $33-44,000+. I am aware of the argument of women not wanting to be pregnant and the psychological strain should one be forced to carry to term. Well a couple counters, you made the decision to have sex and you got pregnant, makes you responsible. Same argument of contraception, take it better next time. I do believe though there needs to be limitations, such as risk of health if mother can't carry to term medically, substantial disruption of life that would either make you exempt from carrying or qualify for financial compensation if resulting in lost income. Basically an argument of what would be more detrimental would ensue and least harmful path chosen. If they both keep well clearly no problem. If they are past the 3 months mark and forgot to declare opting in or out, then both parties are each 50% financially responsible.

Longjumping_Fly_2978 · 2022-11-26T06:57:55+00:00

That's a pretty smart and good move. 100% approve.

NekoiNemo · 2022-11-26T07:45:08+00:00

That last one hits hard. Because i had this exact discussion with a dear person in my life, who is outraged by the abortion bans in the US... while also openly stating that he doesn't see an issue with men being one-sidedly forced into parenthood they don't want. And just a priori dismissing any attempts at drawing hte parallels between the two

icemanww15 · 2022-12-20T19:32:29+00:00

its not a coincidence that ppl are saying HER body HER choice

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