Q4ALL: What are your dealbreakers? Please include your gender as part of your answer.

hammerhaunts · 2018-12-04T20:18:49+00:00

Male,

Prior cheating is a deal breaker I guess

legaladvicequest · 2018-12-04T21:21:23+00:00

Lady here

kids from a previous relationship, because i don't want your ex in my life

prior cheating, because it's a you problem

cruelty towards animals or the powerless, because when you can't get something from them then you become an ugly person

lying, because i can't trust you

dependence, especially on me due to unwillingness to work- i'm a giver and won't tolerate a taker

lack of proximity, because time spent together is important

lack of fitness / hygiene, because beauty is important to me

physically or emotionally abusive tendencies / score keeping, because i'm not your enemy

mythology / religion, because it indicates you don't think rationally, which leads us into...

low intelligence, because i desire a capable partner

low libido / vanilla, because i'm stuck with you forever

smokes cigarettes / alcoholism, because i'll lose you too soon

the_calibre_cat · 2018-12-05T00:44:54+00:00

Male

Overly any -ist, be that feminist, Christianist, Atheist, etc. Moderation is important, empathy is important. If you're the only moral person in your world and everyone from the other side is just a bunch of stupid irredeemable evil people... I tend to think you might not be the perfect moral paragon you think you are.
Overly fat. Sorry, not sorry. I'm fit. I eat well. My clothes fit. It's not too much to ask the same of my partner.
Reasonably intelligent
Reasonably independent, so I can have good conversations with my reasonably intelligent girlfriend about the hobbies and interests she has that I don't share that I can learn about to make her happy, etc.
No kids. I'd ONS a single mom. I would not date or marry one.
Some semblance of a career. Doesn't have to be turbo lucrative, but I'd prefer it to be something beyond "waitress," though if she was hot and interesting enough, shit yeah.
Not sedentary. I like lazy days, I am a lazy asshole, but I work my ass off and when I go play, I play fucking hard. I'd want someone who's a little bit of both.
Not extreme. I'm not going to eat nothing but kale and sunflower seeds for the rest of my life. I like tiramisu and fettucine alfredo and alcohol, I intend to enjoy those things from time to time and I'd like to share those moments with someone meaningful to me.

There's probably more, but that's all I can think of at the moment.

exit_sandman · 2018-12-04T20:44:06+00:00

Male

Feminist
Fat
Muslim
Extreme Christian
Older than me and doesn't look youthful / good looking
Serious mental illness (hoarding disorder, schizophrenia, etc.)
SWJ
Poor hygiene
Have kid(s)

RockinSocksII · 2018-12-04T22:38:47+00:00

Woman:

Judgemental
Poor hygiene
Mean

[deleted] · 2018-12-04T22:56:30+00:00

Male.

Already has kids

Was "wild" in the past

Immature

Plays mind games

Is feminist in a combative way or spends time boring me about her feminist ideas

Wants to go to stupid places on dates that I categorically state I don't like.

Overweight

Over 40

Complains or has a checklist in dating profile/ spends the first date complaining about stuff

flamingoinghome · 2018-12-04T21:05:12+00:00

Woman

-Unkind

-Racist/sexist/homophobe

-Smells bad

-Can't hold a good conversation with me

-History of cheating (once a long time ago is okay)

-Addict

-Doesn't ever want kids (that one's only a LTR dealbreaker, not something casual)

-Has a mental illness they don't currently have a handle on

-No ambition

Barely-moral · 2018-12-04T20:18:36+00:00

Male

-She is not willing to give me her best (compared to the way she treated her previous partners)

-She is a liar

-She is a cheater

-She puts her career over the relationship

-Lackluster sex life

-Lack of romantic displays of affection

Those are the first that come to mind. I am sure there are more.

RoyalAugur92 · 2018-12-04T20:38:02+00:00

Male.

Kids from a previous relationship, stupidity, unwillingness to combat her natural tendency towards frigidity - that's about it.

philomexa · 2018-12-04T21:21:50+00:00

female

bases a large part of his masculinity (or identity) on having a job/career/money
has visited a sex worker
fat
boring ass basic bro hobbies and interests
humorlessness
believes in quid pro quo sex
zero arts in his life ( skills, appreciation, talent, etc)
STEM nerds
wears the typical white man attire (khakis + polo, jeans + graphic T)
history of shittiness (behavior, habits, beliefs, etc)
weird porn-fed sexuality
friendless or has a small social circle of sperg-nerd friends
passionless bore
has a very controlling or prohibitive lifestyle and world view.
religious
more than 5 years older than me
dislikes animals and children
straight edge lifestyle.
can't handle his drink or drugs

I really like tortured artistes, I REALLY don't like basic fuck square ass STEM bros.

AY_ES_DEE_EF · 2018-12-04T21:47:16+00:00

ITT People being judgy as fuck and men not wanting to date feminists/ anyone with a political opinion...

PanderjitSingh_k · 2018-12-05T04:40:39+00:00

I’m a man. Everything is a dealbreaker. I’m done.

Civil_Seaworthiness · 2018-12-04T20:26:08+00:00

I'm a woman

My dealbreakers, for a person who I want to be with in all other respects:

Is not kind to me

Is not kind to people other than me

Takes more than 30 minutes to go see them

Doesn't wish to participate in any, or just prohibitively few, of the activities I enjoy (working out, rock climbing, talking about dumb shit like I do here, watching shows that I like, the beach, hiking, learning new things, painting, listening to the eclectic subset of music that I like)

Doesn't get along with my family/friends

Childfree/dislikes children/wouldn't make a good parent (short temper, unwilling to compromise, etc)

Doesn't get my jokes/thinks I'm not funny

_anothergumnut_ · 2018-12-04T21:09:42+00:00

Female.

Boring/lazy

Lack of a strong worldview/set of principles that are his own

Too much respect for the rules/law

Not wanting marriage/kids

Neuroticism

throwaway44783629 · 2018-12-04T23:44:50+00:00

Male:

-Fat, chubby, thick, really anything that isn't slender or fit.

-Doesn't have a career. i really don't care how much they make, as long as they can support themselves.

-Doesn't share my sense of humor.

-Kids.

-Slutty, or has a history of being promiscuous (yeah, hard to find out, more ideal than practical)

-has bad habits- excessive drinking, smoking, drugs, lazy, bad diet, etc.

-Isn't honest and kind.

-Materialistic girls, SJW types and those hipstery, nihilistic types.

TheMedsPeds · 2018-12-04T23:50:50+00:00

Straight woman:

HAS OR WANTS BIO KIDS: I have no interest in having kids of my own or raising someone else's kids.

DEAD BEAT THAT CAN'T HOLD A JOB: I don't want to be your sugar momma.

CHEATER: Because I don't want to get cheated on. If you want to have outside sex fine, but you have to have an open relationship (I hate dishonesty) and you can't be banging a ridiculous amount of side pieces

DRUG ADDICT/ALCOHOLIC: been there, never again.

HIGH LIBIDO/NON-VANILLA: I have a low libido and don't have any sort of kinks. After the initial honeymoon phase I have no interest in having sex more than once a week. I don't want to get pissed on, "dominated", choked, call you daddy or any other weird shit.

RELIGIOUS/RP/RIGHT WING: Because I am a left wing atheist.

LOOKS: NO TALL GUYS OVER 6'0, NO SHORT GUYS BELOW 5'4, NO BODY BUILDERS OR OBESE GUYS

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lonelinessmademecave · 2018-12-04T20:38:36+00:00

Male. I think mine are for the most part pretty standard, although I might care more about education and career more than most. The only interesting one I have is tattoos. The reason as to why I feel so strongly about this is a mystery to me. I was once involved with a girl who I discovered had a discrete and tasteful tattoo above her ankle and for whatever reason it was a huge turn off for me.

a_vanillae · 2018-12-04T21:01:15+00:00

Female. In no particular order: smoking and heavy drug use (includes alcohol), slurpy noises while eating (I have misophonia, it's a bitch), lack of personal hygiene and self-care, inability and/or lack of desire to care for their belongings (ex: car, apartment, guitar) and dependents (ex: pets, kids). Lack of structured morals, lack of intelligence*, unreasonable rigidity, any features of psychopathy.

*Personally I think intelligence is a loaded term. I would rather be with a man of average IQ and excellent street smarts and wisdom than the inverse.

yasee · 2018-12-04T21:39:47+00:00

dealbreakers like at the selection stage? serious crimes, all the isms you'd expect a hippie sjw to object to & chewing gum. Cannot stand gum

female

DemonConsulting · 2018-12-04T21:41:04+00:00

Female

Smoking of any substance
recreational drug use, additction (both legal and illegal)
non-monogamous
doesn't want kids
doesn't want marriage
doesn't prioritize our relationship/family/marriage over other aspects of their life (like always putting their career first, working crazy long hours without financial necessity, etc.)
preachy/ abnoxious/ extreme views on religion, politics, lifestyle, etc.
stupidity and/or ignorance with no interest in learning
major unresolved issues from past relationships that I will have to “solve“ or deal with

Exile_In_Redditville · 2018-12-04T22:19:18+00:00

Female

Introverted (only room for one of us), Extrovert with no boundaries (be situationally appropriate), religious, unhygienic, smoker, secretive, non-functional drug use (handle your shit, no heroin, nothing but 420 on the regular), animal and kid hate, scared to try new things/default answer to novelty is "no"

oftheinfinite · 2018-12-05T00:47:15+00:00

Male

Bisexuality
Pro LGBT
Mostly Heterosexual
Democrat
Republican
Tradcon
Progressive
Female-centric sex/lazy sex partner
Anti-porn (but not pro-porn)
Fat
No ass
Small ass
Flat Chest
Hairy
No hour glass figure
Orange Man Bad/Good
Anti-theist/militant atheist
Christian Bisexual
Fundamentalist faith
Obnoxious animal lover
So open-minded that her mind has fallen out
Blathers on and on about cats/dogs
Talks about politics a lot
Feminist
Anti-feminist
Gynocentric
Androcentric
Me too
Shitty social media
Kylie Jenner face
Smart and arrogant about it
Dumb
Dresses in yoga pants
Dresses in short shorts
Dictator of aesthetic in the house
Talks too much/too little
Career woman
SAHM
Slept with black men/desires black men
No hobbies
Hates art
Mainstream music
High n-count
Virgin but boring as hell

[deleted] · 2018-12-06T05:19:54+00:00

Male

If she's a feminist or any kind of SJW.

That screams victim mentality, lack of any kind of introspection and zero accountability for her own failures.

BleuBird18 · 2018-12-04T20:41:49+00:00

Woman

In no particular order:

Smokes or chews
Shorter than 5'10 (I am 6'00")
Works excessively
Obsessed with status
Hates their family (there are legitimate reasons for not wanting anything to do with family. However I want to be with someone that understands what it means to be close to family, and the obligations that can go along with that)
Irresponsible with money
Characterizes normal social courtesies and politeness as "being forced to lie or unfairly change their personality."
"Small minded" (racist, sexist, homophobic etc)
Very religious and they want to share their faith (I'm not willing to convert to any religion for a partner)
Takes themselves too seriously, inability to just laugh at their mistakes and chill out
Poly (nothing wrong with having multiple relationships, but I'm strictly mono girl)
Has a score keeping mentality, unwilling to be flexible or discuss problems
Unhealthy jealous tendencies (controlling, possessive, distrustful)

Mr_White119811 · 2018-12-04T21:04:35+00:00

Male

-Has kids

-Does not respect her body and does not exercise

-Strong feminist views

-Interested in politics

-Excessive Tattoo's

-Excessive Piercings

-Puts career above everything else

-Does not have similar/shared interests

-Alchoholic

-Not interested in sex

-Large debt

-Creates too much drama

-Cheats

-Vegan/Vegitarian

-Lies

whitetrashcarl · 2018-12-04T21:49:54+00:00

Male

Dealbreaker: Is anything other than head over heels crazy about me

panzershark · 2018-12-04T22:21:06+00:00

I'm a woman. Not an exhaustive list here.

Religious
Far right OR far left
Fat
Hobbies that are limited to 'Netflix, hanging out with friends'
Has a place that's a pig sty
Doesn't drink
Smoking
Hard drug use
Band tees/skate shoes/trucker hats
Excessive tattoos
Over 25 miles away
Vegan/vegetarian
Doesn't do oral sex

jax006 · 2018-12-04T20:18:47+00:00

Fat. Doesn't enjoy slightly rugged outdoors stuff. Picky about food, what to do this weekend, ect.

Male

petrichordium · 2018-12-04T20:24:05+00:00

Male. Dealbreakers:

Wants total monogamy longterm (will do introductory monogamy and am v flexible on rules but any true LTR is non monogamous to me).

Unwise. I don’t care at all how formally educated or “intellectual” she is but ppl who are just ... deeply stupid or delusional are not fun.

Doesn’t take good care of herself.

Doesn’t enjoy femmeing it up on the regular. Idgaf how she looks indoors with me, and i could care less how she looks when just bumming around doing errands, but i need some effort in the feminine charm department on date night. No always sloppy sweatpants addicts or frumpy utilitarians.

Has no interests or passions beyond just basic shit. Again, i also don’t care about her professional ambition and have happily supported artists etc, but i need someone who likes things they regularly dive deeply into.

verticordia · 2018-12-05T01:31:07+00:00

I didn't realize we were allowed to be petty/nitpicky let me redact my other comment. I'm still a female lol. 1. Not knowing how to dress.

Introversion. I'm an introvert and extrovert but I need someone more extroverted than me while I'm warming up my social battery lol.
Straight edge. I don't want to date a junkie... still holding out for my drug dealer with a heart of gold but I know it's not rational lol.
Skeptical/obsessed with rAtIoNalItY and fACtS dOn'T cArE aBoUt yoUr fEeLiNgS. Ok ben shapiro. I'm a numerologist/astrologist and law of attraction fanatic with an altar in my room. I don't mean a guy has to be into my witchy shit, but he can respect it from a distance or show interest in my hobbies.
Following the rules too much. I've had guys my age reject sex because "they don't skip class". No, I'm not ugly. I'm definitely above average, and even if I was average, teenage boys are supposed to be high libido. What's in the water these days?
weird attitude about sex. don't be obsessed with sex and say weirdo shit or always expect sex, but don't be afraid to kiss me or make a move.
Boringness. It's more for his sake than mine. I understand why men like nice quiet sweet girls that are introverted and all that shit but I'm a retard that will rail Adderall before facetiming 6ix9ine's friend and explaining his life path number to him. My life is always exciting 24/7.

hammerhaunts · 2018-12-04T20:31:59+00:00

Wants anal, threesomes, or casual sex.

kandyapplez · 2018-12-04T22:13:52+00:00

F:

Shorter than 5'10" (but more likely, shorter than 6'1")
In a career where earnings will cap early
Balding
Does not live in my desired neighborhoods
Not my idea of "cool"
As of right now, over 30
Involved in ugly weird loser people kinks like DDLG

Texastentialism · 2018-12-04T20:30:18+00:00

Besides obvious things like cheating or abuse...

Smoking cigarettes, hard drug use, not liking cats, embarrassing me, prissiness, drama queen behavior, not wanting marriage/kids, non-vanilla sexual proclivities.

Edit: Female

Salty-Bastard · 2018-12-04T20:43:34+00:00

Disrespect.

crackrocksteady7 · 2018-12-04T21:59:21+00:00

I'm a pretty girl

Ignoring all the obvious boring ones

No boring basic bitch socialites, no boring basic documentary watching intro pseudointellectuals. Bad relationship with daddy. Boring in bed. All Male friends (intolerable when the allure of pussy is gone). Uses snapchat filters. Thot behavior. No good girls

jonascf · 2018-12-04T22:03:22+00:00

Male.

Dealbreakers: Negative outlook on life. Materialistic.

Sophiatab · 2018-12-04T22:06:22+00:00

Female

Must be Jewish or willing to convert (current SO is working on that)

Family does not condone illegitimacy or approve of divorce

Practical about financial matters. (Does not have to be the higher salary between us, but must be able to balance a budget and not be a spendthrifts)

Not a Trump supporter or a Tea Party person

Non-smoker, non-gum chewer

The fewer sexual partners in the past the better

Tedesche · 2018-12-04T22:13:50+00:00

Male (hetero)

Believes in God or any other supernatural crap, as well as bullshit like flat earth/anti-vax.
Is a feminist.
Has any history of infidelity.
Doesn’t find me funny / isn’t funny.
Doesn’t find me intelligent / isn’t intelligent.
Isn’t sexually attracted to me / isn’t sexually attractive.

Wandos7 · 2018-12-04T22:18:13+00:00

Female

Poor hygiene, body odor, greasy
Sadistic
Already has kids
Hard drugs
History of cheating
Compulsive liars, dishonesty in general
Tradcons
Asian fetishists (I'm Asian). Weebs could be ok depending on the person, fetishists are not.
Racist
Expects all sex to be like porn
Spends a significant amount of time participating in the following communities online: Conspiracy Theories, Fat Hate, SlutHate, Coontown, Bodybuilding, 4chan, Manosphere, InfoWars
Makes wild assumptions about my personality/preferences/past behavior based on things not communicated (e.g., assuming something specific based on something like the 'slut tells' list, "drinks whisky means does anal" or something)
Controlling
Proudly ignorant
Fiscally irresponsible
History of DUIs
No friends and clingy 24/7

goatismycopilot · 2018-12-04T22:20:04+00:00

Laydeeeeeeee Person.

Religious or militant atheist both groups are insufferable assholes and I just do not have the time.

Job that involves law enforcement or excessive travel.

Disliking animals.

History of alcoholism, unmanaged mental health, debts not associated with mortgages.

Super extreme views or conspiracy stuff because there is never just on it is an ant colony of crazy usually.

Couch potato.

Crazy exes because you find out there is a reason.

Multiple marriages because you find out there is a reason.

Radically different culture because there are is a reason.

LeJacquelope · 2018-12-04T23:38:24+00:00

Male. When I was single I didn't deal with women who were: - Hypergamic in any way - Radical feminist / unsympathetic toward men's causes - Republican / tradcon - Abusive - Lizzie Velasques level ugly (I can handle a wide range here but wow) - Sexually boring or (on the other extreme) was into anal sex - Stupid - Some other things but those are the horsemen of my unattractiveness apocalypse

Whodunnit88 · 2018-12-05T00:11:27+00:00

Male,

Wants kids.

Has kids.

Married.

In a relationship.

Wants marriage.

Busy.

Career woman.

Hates online messaging.

Treats me like she's doing me a favour being in my presence.

TheBookOfSeil · 2018-12-05T01:16:59+00:00

Male in biological squirrel body.

Prior cheating. Also, reoccurring or repetitive problems. If we have to have a million fights/arguments about the same exact thing, that’s it. Three strikes and you’re out.

Edit: Anyone resembling or having personality traits similar to my mother:

Borderline or outright narcissism (“Everyone is jealous of me.”)
Superiority complex (“I’m better than everyone and I’m always right even when I’m wrong”)
Two-faced and drama-prone
Disney Princess Syndrome

reluctantly_red · 2018-12-05T01:52:02+00:00

Male

-- Boring, no cool interests, little curiosity

-- uneducated (graduate degree preferred)

-- no career (not looking for another dependent)

-- overly materialistic

-- externally motivated (i.e. cares about what other people think too much)

-- religious (I'm an atheist and would prefer her to be too)

-- too conservative (women who voted for Trump are even worse than the guys who did)

-- doesn't have a pretty face (she can be skinny or fat AF but she needs to have a pretty face)

-- doesn't like/want kids

-- no practical skills (she doesn't have to be able to rebuild an engine but she at least has to be able to check the oil and change a tire).

Thounumber1 · 2018-12-05T02:16:58+00:00

Male

-- not going to school or not having a job

-- not caring about her future, being too impulsive and only caring about having fun now

-- partying/clubbing a lot/excessive drinking

-- not being into fitness/out of shape

-- having/wanting kids

-- giving shit tests. I don't want someone emotionally immature

-- too big of an age difference

-- expecting men to put in all the effort

-- not ever paying her share on dates

-- associating negative stereotypes to people due to their job or ethnicity

-- If she is a student, not having any sort of plan as to what to do for work post graduation is bad

-- believing in superstition like astrology or being into eccentric stuff like reiki/faith healing/etc.

-- religious

-- too conservative/not progressive

-- boring, and expects the guy to be interesting

-- looking down on guys that struggle with dating/thinking that something is wrong with them if they have a low N count/etc (I'm not talking about incels. I'm talking about good men that struggle, because let's face it, it isn't easy).

cxj · 2018-12-05T02:49:41+00:00

Male. LTR deal breakers: has kids, smokes, personality is heavily defined by religious/political beliefs of any kind. Serious, current drug use or current heavy drinking. Don’t care if you did blow one time at a wedding 4 years ago. Don’t care if you drank a lot at parties in college and casually drink now.

SkookumTree · 2018-12-05T03:50:20+00:00

Vapid. Severely or heritably deformed. Not in decent to good physical shape.

Lots of personality dealbreakers: I need to know someone's personality to be attracted, and I love blunt, abrasive, caring people. Not many physical dealbreakers. I could get with a woman that looked like Freddy Kreuger if she had a personality I found very attractive - assuming it wasn't heritable!

darla10 · 2018-12-05T04:01:01+00:00

Woman. Fecklessness is the #1 deal breaker. Man must have a plan.

trettles · 2018-12-05T04:54:04+00:00

Female

Conservative
Smoker
Prior cheater
Religious
Bad kisser
Won't go down on me
Controlling
Overly close with family
Doesn't like animals
Wants kids

p3n3lop3 · 2018-12-05T07:40:25+00:00

1) Smoking

2) Liberal/ SJW/ NPC/ White knight of any type

3) Weed (any amount for any reason ever is a no from me)

4) Doesn't work out, stay active or build muscle in some way

5) Living at home. Sorry I've tried.

6) Catholic (too negative)

7) Has close female friends

8) Friends with exes where no kids are involved

9) Into spectator sports. Nope, buh bye.

10) Bad spelling and grammar

11) Lack of curiosity about their motivations, feeling and past trauma, Unwilling to go to therapy if neccesary.

12) Wants kids (I am childfree). I would get involved with a man with kids IF he is a widow. Otherwise, no.

13) Facial piercings or earrings. Would never get one myself but (ugh) I can deal with tattoos on men to a degree, if I must.

14) Does not own a vehicle ( I live in Canada, public transportation sucks. I drive, but I'm not a chauffeur. I've tried, I can't seriously date a man without a vehicle)

15) REALLY into social media. Does inappropriate things on social media (ie follow instagram thots with their asses out all day long, liking other girls' duckface selfies, etc)

16) Into "poly", "ethical non monogamy" and other laughable degenerate lunacy making the rounds these days

Ladyofblades · 2018-12-05T08:09:57+00:00

Female.

Lack of drive/motivation - Has to have some hunger
Lack of passion
Disorderliness - Can't clean, generally disorganized, no planning
Bad manners - Treats everyone well regardless of who they are
Cruelty/just being a jerk in general
Being unchangeable/having a closed mind - Must be balanced and have opinions but be able to accept when he needs to change and to discuss it with equanimity
Inability to take care of oneself and one's affairs - Just adulting with verve
Lack of fitness/inactivity/bad hygiene - I value being healthy, clean and attractive
General ignorance - Has to have some interest in the world, current affairs, history, be able to discuss matters intelligently and with some depth and breadth
Incompatible lifestyle, goals, values or tastes
Lack of physical attraction

exit_sandman · 2018-12-05T10:17:19+00:00

That's a long list, I define my ideal partner more along the lines of dealbreakers than having a laundry list of "must haves"

has kids
doesn't want kids, is the opposite of family-oriented
current or former slut or sex worker
history of cheating and/or STD (mentioning both separately because even though they correlate with sluttiness, you can still check that box without being one)
criminal record
doesn't like sex (or doesn't like sex with me) and everything that comes with it: never initiates, isn't visibly enjoying herself, isn't adventurous and prefers to stick to vanilla sex, is content with having rather little sex etc.
SJW or SJW leanings, or other extreme opinions (that can cover basically everything regarding religion and politics)
mental illness, addiction, psychological disorders or trauma
legitimately alpha-widowed
has an extremely unpleasant personality (rude, bitchy, entitled, overly demanding, extremely clingy, notorious liar, looks down on people socially below her etc.)
stupid, ignorant, no sense of humor; mostly or completely incompatible regarding likes, dislikes or interests (this is one bullet point because they tend to go hand in hand)
above or below a certain age
oh, and I should find her physically attractive (this includes not having a questionable hygiene)

agloelita · 2018-12-05T12:57:52+00:00

Bisexual lady

Pedophile Sexist Racist Physically abusive to animals Excessively violent Anger management issues Liar Weight above 600lbs Disrespectful of other people's religion Polygamous

wtffellification · 2018-12-05T16:07:35+00:00

Male

"Let's see where this goes"

No thanks, I'd rather be celibate

a-WaltzingMatilda · 2018-12-05T20:31:35+00:00

I’m a dude.

Kids. Overweight.

Belugoid · 2018-12-05T23:08:53+00:00

Male,

My dealbreakers are being rightwing/conservative and being too religious. Oh and not wanting kids, I guess, if we're talking serious marriage-minded relationships.

slavicgypsygirl · 2018-12-05T23:16:48+00:00

I am a female who only likes dating which I state upfront so mine is always possessiveness

[deleted] · 2018-12-07T00:01:06+00:00

Male,
I'm my own dealbreaker.

[deleted] · 2018-12-19T19:40:01+00:00

Male here. In no particular order:

unattractive (to me)
fat (I like fit women)
ugly (I am attracted to pretty women)
uneducated, formal or informal education is fine. (I like to have interesting conversations)
vulgar (I am not a prude, but there's a time and place for everyhthing. I enjoy the occasional dive bar, but not someone who constantly behave as if they are in a dive bar)
too old ;-)
financially unstable, living paycheck by paycheck and drowning in debt. It just have ramifications in all aspects of life and it's an extension of someone's personality
with a dead-end job, I am attracted to educated career women

And yes, I bring to the table all of the above too.

LewisCross · 2018-12-04T20:37:13+00:00

Male.

--smokes cigarettes. Uses illegal drugs.

--doesn't like sex

--treated other men better than she treats me

--dishonest

For an LTR or my commitment, the above, plus the following:

--is a bitch

--has ever been treated for a mental illness/addiction of any kind

--has had an abortion

--is more than 2 years older than me

--is unwilling to divulge/talk about her past sex life/N

apube · 2018-12-04T20:44:31+00:00

Lesbian woman.

Unattractive to me, no sexual chemistry, too masculine, history of cheating, not absolutely crazy about me, controlling, has kids.

_Neon_Shadow_ · 2018-12-04T21:11:42+00:00

Male, but I identify as an attack helicopter. Dealbreakers:

Feminist. Single mothers. Obese. Toxic. Narcissist. Clingy. High N count. Cheater. Attention whore. Republican/Trump Supporter.

Jebediah_Goodplow · 2018-12-05T10:51:49+00:00

Male

Drug addiction in history, other than cannabis

Does not in some way consume cannabis

Smokes cigarettes

Is Christian, Islamic, or religiously Jewish

Has more than 2 kids, or wants more kids

Is vegan/vegetarian/pescatarian/etc.

ImJuliusPepperwood · 2018-12-04T20:56:31+00:00

Male

Has or wants children
Doesn’t have a career or a passion for something. Wants to be SAHW or SAHM.
Must like the outdoors. Hiking, etc.
Overweight
Smokes or does any kind of drugs.
Wears excessive makeup
Must have good teeth
Racist, homophobic, etc.

sailorlycia · 2018-12-05T05:43:07+00:00

Female

High N (for us anything past zero is already pushing it, only gets worse from there; anything past first base counts toward N)
Not willing to wait until marriage
Disrespectful/rude
Dislikes my family
Arrogant
Doesn't want kids
Not willing to raise our kids Catholic
Doesn't have at least a bachelor's degree
Drugs, including MJ

chloapsoap · 2018-12-04T23:22:02+00:00

Female.

Outie bellybutton

Truedemocracy4 · 2018-12-04T23:42:52+00:00

Male. I'm top 10% and thus have high standards, so many:

is in debt. Student debt is ok if she can pay it off herself
doesn't have a career.
has tattoos
heavy social media presence
heavy into nightlife/club lifestyle
doesn't exercise regularly (3x a week)
is older than me
doesn't have similar education level (basically just needs a college degree)

lefactorybebe · 2018-12-04T20:21:13+00:00

Oh God, so many. I'm a woman. Let's see......any arrest for anything other than like some weed when they were a kid, any extremely deviant sexual interests, alcoholism/drug addiction, being 100% totally certain decided one way or another on kids (still unsure myself), having kids, someone who's previous SO died while they were still together, oh haha being involved in the manosphere, any cockiness/arrogance, previous history of cheating on a SO, previous history of violence towards a SO, animal abuse, disliking animals and not wanting pets, idk there's just so much haha

TriadFamilyTimes · 2018-12-04T20:37:11+00:00

Dealbreakers...hmmm

- Significant materialism

- Significant Jealousy issues

- Monogamous

- Not progressive

- Not scientifically and politically literate

- Not above average in sex drive

- Family isn't first life priority/doesn't enthusiastically want to be a parent

- Abusive habits like gaslighting, avoiding responsibility, lying, and hostile emotional manipulation

- Addiction of any kind

- Unaddressed mental illness

- History of infidelity (specifically violating agreements within the relationship with regard to it)

- History of physical abuse as perpetrator

- Bowing to parents as an adult in any significant way or other such issues where their family should lose to their partner in priority and doesn't.

- Inability to maintain or establish healthy boundaries in or out of the relationship.

I could probably go on. I'm a guy.

rainisthelife · 2018-12-04T22:32:57+00:00

I’m female.

In no particular order:

Lazy and does not have a good job
Short
Lack of confidence and humor
Has a contempt for women/jaded and bitter
Is unkind
Does not make me a priority
Past history of cheating
Controlling
Fat
Has children

Edit: Triggered and bitter fat, short and low value men downvoting because they know they tick most of these boxes. At least now they know why they’re alone.

Uncommon_Sensed_1234 · 2018-12-04T20:52:17+00:00

Dealbreakers for what? Dating, LTR, marriage.

For me in marriage it would be cheating and emotional or physical abuse.

Gravel_Roads · 2018-12-04T22:16:37+00:00

Male, bisexual.

Hard No for both men and women:

Bullies, close-mindedness, jealousy, double-standards, people who sacrifice themselves to fit into society, guilting, dependency on me to fix their emotions, asking me for money, fear of new things, wanting to control my schedule or where I go and when. Also people who get emotional “for” me or try to coerce me into showing emotion or giving validation when I don’t feel like it... People that abuse or mistreat animals or family members.

There’s probably more, I tend to reject about 75% of all advances in grounds of incompatibility. People are really stupid and don’t do this often enough. I’d rather not have a partner than have a partner that makes me crazy.

WomenRnpcs · 2018-12-04T23:16:22+00:00

Male,

Obesity

Tattoos

Stds

Below 18

Drug use

Black

Slutty/cheater

deadsandsushi2 · 2018-12-06T02:08:19+00:00

37f.

Dealbreakers for a relationship are: outside my race, single dad, wants kids, is very religious, politically liberal, has debt, is materialistic, is very extroverted, is very emotional, is very possessive, wants submissive partner, overweight, doesn't lift weights, has cheated on past partners, any past or current addictions or mental illness, any drug use, anything more than very moderate drinking, poor diet.

Title	Q4ALL: What are your dealbreakers? Please include your gender as part of your answer.
Author	firewatchersdaughter
Upvotes	8
Comments	220
Date	December 4, 2018 8:13 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/a34dga/q4all_what_are_your_dealbreakers_please_include/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4all-what-are-your-dealbreakers-please-include.258729 https://theredarchive.com/post/258729

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