What constitutes a 'bad boy'? A lot of posts have been about bad boys recently.

Grappleheart · 2022-04-17T20:19:53+00:00

I think a person who partakes in societally subversive behavior.

Orange_Paisley · 2022-04-17T19:55:49+00:00

Your local youth pastor has tattoos these days. They mean nothing.

Bikerbats · 2022-04-17T21:01:45+00:00

Reddit's idea of bad boy might fall short of the mark. Every single friend I ever had growing up was a bad boy, or girl. Drugs was the #1 hobby. Criminality to afford said drugs was everyone's avocation. Tattoos were ubiquitous. Authority was an obstacle, and never respected. Promiscuity was the norm, not the exception. Some of us made it out of that, some of us are still there, and some of us didn't make it at all.

I think the real question is why any of that was appealing to anyone, but the gods know that it was. Don't know a single friend from childhood who was sexually/romantically unsuccessful, including myself.

However, I have always had one foot in nerd culture that started with comic books and Star Trek and grew from there.. I know tons of people from that world who've never been sexually/romantically successful. Well educated, decent income, and total mastery over repelling women.

NockerJoe · 2022-04-17T20:32:47+00:00

The most reasonable answer is "You'll know it when you see it". Sometimes bad boys are just suburban white kids who smoke ditch weed. Sometimes bad boys are actual violent criminals. Sometimes it's all just a vibe and they haven't actually done anything wrong.

OkWhile66 · 2022-04-17T20:32:17+00:00

Hmm, I have a 'bad boy' friend whose well pass triple digits, but he's not a criminal, have any tattoos, or anything like that. I'm honestly not sure why so many women have wanted to sleep with him. I'll give it a shot:

Good looking. That's the biggest thing, every girl thinks he's cute
ridiculous confident in himself, even though he's not smart or wealthy and has 'successfully' bartended his way through his 30's. Seriously, it's to the point of delusion.
huge liar. I don't know if this helps, but he will literally lie about anything and everything. He doesn't even remember to keep his lies straight, but if he's just trying to sleep with someone, combined with the above two, it seems to help. He'll lie about the most pointless things, that don't even make him look better, to the point I think he has a complex
Is very forward with women. He comes onto them and flirts shamelessly and at times aggressively with everyone women he meets. It'd normally be very creepy, and it really comes off like that to me, but I guess again, due to the above, it gets positive feedback.
Maybe something about the women he flirts with? He's mostly slept with his co workers at coffee shops, restaurants, and bars, and the younger women he patronize those. We joke after he's slept with every women at his new job, he starts looking for a new one. Because he sorta does do it like, and it's kinda gross. To get an idea of the kinda guy he is, someone made a comment after he went home with a girl from a party that she most have been drunk, and his response was 'I don't need to get them drunk when they're young, they're just dumb'

That said, he's in his early 30's now, has gotten a degree and a job, and is marrying a nice 25 year old accountant with a decent job. I have no clue if she knows of his err, history

hungarian_builder · 2022-04-17T20:04:22+00:00

I think it can be emulated pretty well by a "good boy". Stuff like : motorcycle riding, somewhat rebellious clothes, adventure and pleasure seeking, standing up when you need to, having a masculine body. This is what women like in them. You do not have to be actually bad. Some may like the actual trash, but it's rare. Even those trash guys can only get away with it because: they can talk well (explain why they aren't trash. In other words: they can lie well) or they are good looking enough.

ZaraFlips · 2022-04-17T20:07:13+00:00

Doesn't care what others think, confident to the point of arrogance, selfish, will stand up for what he believes even if it's wrong. Projects the image of willingness to defend himself physically

GhostofCamus · 2022-04-17T21:44:36+00:00

I think the line is if your mattress is on a bed frame. Not including if that frame folds into a couch. If you're getting laid on twin mattress with no boxspring, you're probably the bad boy.

Catesa · 2022-04-18T06:22:36+00:00

A someone with a lot of negative traits looking like positive ones to naive people.

Arogance and nonchalance (poor ability to weight out risks) looks like confidence in being able to deal with stuff.

Agresivity looks like assertivenes, competitiveness, and confidence. Hints at ambition and ability to stand up for yourself.

Posesivness and jealousy can look like caring and protectiveness. Isolating you from support networks is framed as protecting you from bad people.

Nonchalance about drama looks like ability to handle stress.

Going against the norms looks like creativity and openness instead of unawareness or not caring about others.

Ability to weasel out of situations signals high survival ability and high verbal inteligence.

Mental illness and personality disorders make you stand out. Seeming creativity, not boring, something is always going on. Wanting to care for the fellow, and he is such a "great guy* otherwise.

Admiring and taking pride in being an ashole can be viewed as honesty and if the woman has had a lot of bad experiences with guys then at least he is upfront about his issues.

Etc.

Being a bad boy dosen't need all of those. Halo effect is the bad boys friend. Good looks, he must be misunderstood. He sometimes does increadibly sweet things, he must actually care, but he just can't help himself. He is fit, he is a rascal, but he has self discipline he just needs to mature, I will stick it out and let myself be abused and used in the meanwhile.

purplish_possum · 2022-04-17T19:54:34+00:00

Not cooperative, Doesn't follow rules if they don't benefit him.

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-04-17T21:37:15+00:00

Machiavellianism, Narcissism and Psychopathy. That's it. You don't need to actually be a "criminal", however these traits do make for good criminals.

iamthemovie1992 · 2022-04-17T23:10:30+00:00

In my opinion, it’s a guy who is generally considered physically attractive by most of the female population in a given setting who is insanely confident in himself and lives how he wants barring breaking any laws that can land him in serious jail time.

That being said, to be a bad boy (a successful one anyway), you gotta have the looks first.

fakingandnotmakingit · 2022-04-17T23:22:32+00:00

Jeez. Tattoos are a dime a dozen. Everyone has one now.

Honestly on ppd a badboy is just the guy who got the girl.

NinjaOfTheSouth · 2022-04-17T19:56:42+00:00

Everybody knows he a scumbag, bad reputation, etc.

But the bad boy trope only lasts until your early twenties. Because of things like money, maturity and that type shit.

back_in_blyat · 2022-04-17T19:48:22+00:00

If I were to pose a definition it would be "a male that overtly and unashamedly displays dark triad personality predispositions"

TermAggravating8043 · 2022-04-17T21:58:45+00:00

I feel the Hollywood answer to this is a naturally good looking guy, who doesn’t follow the current fashion but stands out confidently in his own style. He’s naturally observant and clever, absorbing information easily. When he speaks to people, he’s straight to the point, openly insults them and talks with sarcasm. He doesn’t care about the greater good cause he’s given up hope about humanity except for the few people he cares about.

Which is exactly why when he shows interest in a girl she’s feels special, she was the only one who showed kindness in a cruel world, but! She can change him, and show him that people aren’t all that bad, or that’s what Hollywood wants her to think

Dr-Misanthropist · 2022-04-17T20:51:29+00:00

The most abusive guys I ever dated were STEM nerds who worked with computers

AutistNerd · 2022-04-17T20:02:04+00:00

Badboy eats ass

gladusgates · 2022-04-17T21:03:56+00:00

A guy who does not supplicate to her. A guy who does not kiss her ass. A guy who knows how to say no. A guy who is not too clean cut.

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-04-17T22:31:56+00:00

There is an old saying "Good boys go to heaven, badboys go wherever they want." This pretty much sums it up. Badboys do everything good/nice boys wish they could. They have self esteem, don't feel bad about themselves, are not shy, they take pride in themselves, don't follow stupid rules made by society to keep average men from getting hot women and go for what they want relentlessly. A badboy will flirt with a woman and make sexual innuendo while a good boy will help her wjth her taxes in hopes she likes him. A badboy cares about a girl being able to please him wjth a good blow job, a good boy worries about impressing a girl wjth his career prospects hoping she rewards him with sex.

I could go on and on.

januaryphilosopher · 2022-04-17T19:38:32+00:00

I think that the definition has been somewhat stretched to say that women don't like men who are nice to them while the bad boys don't do anything...bad. Things like drinking or having tattoos are brought up and they're not doing anything wrong. If you just mean there's a group of women who like men with a stereotypical "rebellious" image then there's nothing really wrong with that. I'd say a bad boy has to actually be bad, as in he mistreats people and doesn't learn from his mistakes.

baresquad · 2022-04-17T20:07:58+00:00

A “bad boy” is basically any dude that gets the girl to the other guy who doesn’t get the girl

It’s a projected assumption from one man about another that he actually knows nothing about

It doesn’t mean anything

Valuable-Marzipan761 · 2022-04-17T19:46:37+00:00

lol why would being tall make you a "bad boy"?

masterofbrokendreams · 2022-04-18T11:40:07+00:00

A "bad boy" is a Chad with attitude and no chance of settling down. He sleeps around, never ties himself to one woman, has hundreds of options in the dating / sex market. And likely isn't planning on settling down untill well into his 40s or 50s

Women like em because they think they can tame them. They take it as a challenge. Basically he's someone who doesn't play by the rules, and tells women "no" all the time. He's the exact opposite of typical pushover "Eric" (I'm just going to call all pushover/doormat type guys "Eric"). Whereas Eric will be there at her beck and call, the bad boy is unpredictable, even if he promises to be there she never knows. He's a mystery and the woman has to work to get him to even show up with consistency. Meanwhile "Eric" is punctual, and predictable.

Women like "bad boys" because they provide a challenge and chase for her. A sure thing isn't as exciting, and they value it less than something you have to keep working for.

Unfortunately, it's usually too late before these women realize it's unlikely she can tame him. She's now approaching 35 and realizing all those good guys she passed up, many of them are married or in a relationship. She went for the bad boy because she wanted a chase, but instead ended up alone in the end.

Dramatic-Emu-1196 · 2022-04-17T20:33:52+00:00

Probably top 1% guy, young, hot, makes a lot of money, basically has no incentive to settle down, is way out of most women's league, and plays the field with impunity.

wrathofkalima · 2022-04-17T23:00:45+00:00

A skateboard and a backwards baseball cap makes me froth at the crotch… so baaaaad

But seriously, I want to know what a bad boy is because apparently, every woman wants one.

ChrismaKwanzukah · 2022-04-18T02:48:59+00:00

Your mom hates him.

Pola_Lita · 2022-04-17T21:37:31+00:00

I always think it's having the male-type qualities in abundance.

Independent, uncooperative, strongly assertive, confident, physically strong, self-reliant.

Yet a lot of the men on PPD will say it's any man with good looks and an ugly personality who has more access to sex than they do.

BecretAlbatross · 2022-04-17T20:57:26+00:00

Any guy with self respect and confidence who doesn't supplicate to women and other men at least qualifies.

ex_red_black_piller · 2022-04-17T21:07:54+00:00

Tattoos are a cry for help. People think it'll help them stand out and be unique, because in real life, they are vanilla af.

Visible-Doughnut-782 · 2022-04-17T23:59:35+00:00

A “bad boy” is simply an attractive and charismatic guy who priorities his own pleasure and desires (sexual or otherwise)over that of his partner. How much of a “bad boy” this person is can range from somebody who leaves the toilet seat up to being a serial killer. The relevant thing is that he is sexually desirable and very confident because of it.

jxjkskkk · 2022-04-18T08:18:47+00:00

A bad boy from the perspective of the girl is someone who doesn’t put up with her bullshit, in fact, he calls her out on it unapologetically. Tends to engage in risk-taking behavior or hobbies, generally lives a more dangerous lifestyle or would prefer to. Doesn’t confirm to typical social norms, I.e. would be the type to stand up to someone publicly rather than just let it go. Probably only has a few close friends, most would see him as mysterious or elusive. Probably has been through a lot of trauma In his life and as a result has a much colder and independent disposition, as opposed to someone who is clingy and needy.

Reddit’s view of a bad boy as tattoos and leather jackets is so off the mark it’s kinda cringe. A “bad boy” appears in much more subtle ways that girls have a sixth sense for detecting.

Specialist-Action-33 · 2022-04-18T13:40:14+00:00

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think the bad boy tendencies begin to develop when you're in middle school. From my experience, many guys at that age were beginning to be bad boys, constantly fighting, drugs etc., and they always attracted the girls. Unfortunately for me, this was around the time I moved with my dad and he was a complete square, making sure I wouldn't end up as a statistic (we lived in Maryland, right outside southeast DC to put in perspective for those who are familiar with that area). So couple his square indoctrination on me with me not having much say in how I was raised, I ended up being forced to live the "neardy" lifestyle, while those bad boys in school were the type who wore designer clothes everyday, good at basketball, grew their hair out (late 90's hair styles). None of them gave AF about being career oriented. None of the bad boys were into Pokemon or Dragonball Z. Chances were they would have been the guy with 15 kids by 10 different women. Back then, I dreamed of being those guys but never was allowed to, so I never got the same attention thet the bad boys received. So next was "Plan B", be the nice guy(TM). The guy who the girls only spoke to when they wanted something. When you unintentionally end being a Nice Guy(TM) the bad boy you wanted to be becomes a fantasy that you try your best to make into a reality carrying into your 30's trying your best to compensate with material things like money or a nice car, finally getting that moment to shine only to be told "you need to grow up".

FreakOutandScream · 2022-04-17T21:31:32+00:00

Wants to overthrow the government, knows how to cook really well, acab, stealing from the rich is cool and what real men do. A dude who follows his own moral and ethical code and tells everyone else to fuck off.

dietwindows · 2022-04-17T19:55:46+00:00

The women of FDS try and become the man they want to date. So look at how wretched those people are and imagine the male version, that's a bad boy.

Skadi793 · 2022-04-17T23:49:09+00:00

The Bad Boy is the guy who

Wants no commitment, and no LTRs
Isn't honest about himself, but simply tells women what they want to hear. They know he is lying, but they don't care.
A guy who is not marriage material
Attractive in some way--either edgy, or traditional
Has some "Alpha" traits: rebellious, outspoken, etc.
Craves excitement

Now not all of this is bad, but as a whole package, it amounts to a dude who is only worth a roll in the sack.

But that is what women want. They want freedom, lack of commitment, fiction and fantasy, excitement, and to play second-fiddle to a dominant guy.

OneComfortable3508 · 2022-04-18T01:29:10+00:00

Creates fun situations, not boring, Asks for forgiveness, not permission (within reason), Unpredictable, Doesn’t care what others think of him, Spontaneous, Takes risks, Breaks norms, Makes women feel intense feelings, Unapologetic, Not a people pleaser, Pleases women by challenging them instead of catering to them.

and I don’t care if you like this horrible run on paragraph because I’m a bad boy. Jk. But I am, and it has paid dividends over the years.

kaiden08 · 2022-04-17T19:53:01+00:00

What constitutes a 'bad boy'?

Refusal to eat pussy.

xsurferdude123x · 2022-04-18T00:06:23+00:00

Sounds like me (minus the lying part) before I cleaned up my act and got married.

Problem with me was a fear of commitment and avoidance of intimacy was driving my abilities and ambitions to blow thru tons and tons of girls and in the process hurt a few good ones which I feel bad about, but at the end of the day, married life beats a so called player life any day.

And honestly, what’s more alpha than banging loads of girls…?

Commitment. Being a real man. Being loyal. Being a good dad. Having a high degree of self confidence.

That’s what did it in the beginning and still keeps the fires in my wife burning….an unshakable belief in my sex appeal.

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hhhhhhikkmvjjhj · 2022-04-17T20:57:41+00:00

I think it’s pretty relative depending on social class and culture. But selfish, arrogant, crime, drugs, violent, bully, arrogant, sociable/funny. These are words that come to mind.

Prof_erez · 2022-04-18T02:33:24+00:00

Alpha male preachers and sigma male wannabes.. does that ring a bell?

Remarkable_Ad_2469 · 2022-04-18T05:52:31+00:00

Anybody taller than 5'6 Good jawline Assertive cocky attitude. Anybody that's not into Mind Craft or the Metaverse Actually anybody that has a penis ,and is good looking . He's a bad boy/ Chad kinda individual. That's the bad boy image these dudes have. Which could be anybody who isn't fugkly ugly. Literally.

Aran82 · 2022-04-18T16:49:03+00:00

I don’t know that it’s even the tattoo’d, criminal, socially deviant biker but there is plenty to suggest that women are massively attracted to dangerous / dark triad personalities.

This phenomenon I have encountered where even ugly guys who were complete assholes but had lots of confidence were with stunners who they were assholes to but they obeyed every whim. Confidence and a type of uncompromising personality seems to loom very large for women who could have their pick of men and they get hooked to the emotional rollercoaster.

redditcleanslate · 2022-04-18T20:14:23+00:00

Dangerous, but in a bubble wrapped way.

Own-Boat-5374 · 2022-04-18T20:32:45+00:00

Its literally just slut but for boys, it means whatever the person saying it wants it to mean.

Cupcakelover1985 · 2022-04-18T21:02:35+00:00

What constitutes a bad boy is relative. It differs per culture/subculture. In general they’re just men/boys who are more hardcore than others of their demographic and they shirk social norms.

It could be as benign as a rebellious stoner/recreational drug user or as nefarious as a cold blooded murderer. You have to observe the culture the “bad boy” comes from and see what the social norms are. In safer suburban neighborhoods the bad boy is more likely to be a recreational drug user. In more dangerous rough and tumble neighborhoods where even the average folks use recreational drugs and get into non lethal street fights the bad boy is more likely to be an actual killer or gangster.

Consistent_Wear_1224 · 2022-04-19T13:03:11+00:00

Bad boy is a good- looking teenage boy or in his early twenties who is troubled but cute. Kinda mysterious, brooding vibe.

He's not just any bad guy, psychopath etc, the attraction is implied. And he needs some kind of tragic backstory that makes him sympathetic.

So yeah, he's actually a fictional character in romance novels and other media directed at women. This guy doesn't really exist in real life as actual "bad boys" are way different. Or it's usually just some PuA LARPing

icarusdionysus · 2022-04-19T23:38:27+00:00

It’s simple. A “bad boy “ is not a push over

Electrical_Coat_8714 · 2022-04-20T02:39:27+00:00

Any dude who's fucking while I'm not 😡

DonQOnIce · 2022-04-17T19:36:26+00:00

In the context of relationships, a bad boy is abusive toward other people.

AelfredRex · 2022-04-18T13:18:07+00:00

Let's consult the current reigning king of the bad boys.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICVWTe083SM

modidlee · 2022-04-18T15:00:58+00:00

it’s similar to what makes someone say their dog is being a “bad boy.” It essentially means a man who’s not predictable and doesn’t try to do everything just to impress a woman. She can’t control him

Freelovehighway · 2022-04-18T17:24:10+00:00

A bad boy is a cringe lable. It's basically just a guy who is a bit of a prick, has likalble traits but it's the type you'd envision your daughter dating.

Title	What constitutes a 'bad boy'? A lot of posts have been about bad boys recently.
Author	uchihaitachi1237
Upvotes	42
Comments	230
Date	April 17, 2022 7:08 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/u5tvfl/what_constitutes_a_bad_boy_a_lot_of_posts_have/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-constitutes-a-bad-boy-a-lot-of-posts-have.1112276 https://theredarchive.com/post/1112276

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