Leveling up this week

spaghettiforhair · 2021-09-06T17:56:44+00:00

I start university this week! First step towards my dream career

planethoneyy · 2021-09-06T18:09:52+00:00

Studying coding and comitting to my skincare routine and sleep schedule.

shecreatedherdream · 2021-09-06T18:18:41+00:00

Job hunting. My job is killing me.

pancakejourney · 2021-09-06T18:24:25+00:00

I'm decluttering my home. I want everything I don't need gone. I already started today and I know everything will be sold or thrown away by the end of the week.

jupitaur9 · 2021-09-06T19:10:33+00:00

I unsubscribed from several relationship subs, as they were just annoying me and needlessly making me feel involved in untenable situations where the advice was mostly just stupid.

CountingDownTheDays5 · 2021-09-06T18:17:44+00:00

I am leveling up this week by putting myself first. Starting by protecting my mental space/state further by distancing myself from specific online activities. Something I saw today made me extremely disappointed, but also didn't shock me. This it is a sign I am to heavily invested. I need to take a step back and rethink some of my ideas and places I frequent.

Junior-Lion7893 · 2021-09-06T18:40:22+00:00

This week: 1. Don’t download dating apps. 2. Get through three journal readings.

2021-09-06T20:08:28+00:00

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top_of_the_stairs · 2021-09-06T17:51:46+00:00

My leveling-up plan for the week is returning to the mantra I made for myself three months ago, when I chose to stop dating for a while. I almost slipped up last week, but I'm back on track now. My mantra a.k.a. my own personal 4 Agreements:

1) Don't date; wait

2) DO NOT DATE! Just don't fucking do it

3) Be kind to yourself

4) Remember to breathe & relax those shoulders, girl

Lost_Kale90 · 2021-09-06T19:43:12+00:00

I'm taking this week for me - I made no plans and am freshening up my apartment - I have all the windows open and fans going and am doing some cleaning and reorganizing.

europoor24 · 2021-09-06T18:12:18+00:00

Finally have time to properly dump LVM (was very busy lately don't ask)
Starting last year of undergrad
Will work on cv for internship search
Skincare routine at night
Getting back into the habit of eating healthy (this goes with dumping the LVM - he was very into junk food and I was tempted)
Power walking on the treadmill at least 20 min every morning - to slowly start being physically active again.

dogfart4 · 2021-09-06T21:01:14+00:00

I started a bodybuilding program last week. I just want to stick with it and keep my protein levels up to 120g+ per day. I want to keep killing it at work and being thoughtful about policies that can help move our work forward.

ShieldMaidenLagertha · 2021-09-06T20:58:26+00:00

I’m starting to think about Christmas plans and gifts already. It really improves my life to start on these things early and cuts out on the typical frantic, last minute stress. I also make it a point to buy myself several Xmas gifts so if I’m not in a relationship when Xmas rolls around, I don’t feel deprived or left out. I try to buy stuff for myself early and wrap it right away so by the time Xmas arrives, I have completely forgot what it even is and it’s now a surprise! 🤣

I used to end up feeling disappointed at Xmas by lame and thoughtless presents from family or boyfriends. This way I’m guaranteed to have something I will like. I’ve also started a few holiday traditions for my chosen family of friends like a cookie swap. It’s such a nice way to add richness and tradition to your celebration. Last year, because of the pandemic, I celebrated Xmas day by myself and was honestly, completely content! I made pancakes and bacon with real, high quality maple syrup and drank mimosas. Later in the day I grazed on an exquisite fondue platter while I unwrapped presents and watched holiday movies. It’s a real lifestyle level up! I highly recommend it! 🤣🥂🍾

your-beast-of-burden · 2021-09-06T21:53:45+00:00

My current job was taking too much of me. 60-80 hour weeks of managing an understaffed team and doing work that I shouldn’t have had to do as someone in management. I had just moved to another state for it but realized with the work load I wasn’t able to make friends or work on myself. I was miserable and it was showing in other areas of my life. And the executive leadership made it abundantly clear that they had no plans to give more support so I could delegate tasks better without overwhelming someone I was managing.

Sooo! I went to look at other jobs, I wasn’t sure about applying and thought I was just going to look. But I found one that felt like a dream and went for it even though I didn’t hit all the qualifications. I just got news that I got it! It’s much better pay and everything about the company says they have a priority on employee well-being. So I’m taking this week to travel and meet up with friends who I haven’t been able to spend quality time with and prepping for the new position.

naturopathicfantasti · 2021-09-06T20:02:52+00:00

I’ve spent years ghost writing successfully selling cook books for 2 male doctors who don’t treat me with respect. They do well because of their social media following.

-This week I started building my own following by shooting cooking videos for my healthy recipes.

-Bought a great LED filming light.

-Bought a flexible tripod for camera.

-Filmed my first video, made social media for my recipes, and posted it!

-Not many are paying attention yet but they will and I will be the one profiting off of my work instead of someone else.

godherselfhasenemies · 2021-09-06T23:16:38+00:00

I've got five job interviews, all would be a 30% raise or better! Here I go, wish me luck!

LittleSnackPack58 · 2021-09-06T19:19:38+00:00

My leveling up routine this week:

Cleaning up my apartment. Getting rid of clutter, organizing my closet, etc. A deep clean basically. I want my home to be my sanctuary and a happy place.
Diet. Eating more fruits, veggies, and drinking a gallon of lemon water daily. I also need to make sure I am getting adequate levels of protein. When I tracked my diet and did a diet analysis I would often fall short on my daily protein intake. I mostly eat a vegetarian diet, but I'm not a vegetarian. I have added collagen back into my diet. I know the science is not there to support that it actually does anything, but when I drank collagen powder over a year ago for a few months, I had the BEST nails of my life. My natural nails are weak, brittle, and flimsy, but after drinking collagen for months they were long and strong.
Starting a regular workout routine. Fitting in at least 30 mins of cardio daily and muscle strengthening workouts. I've never been overweight, but I let myself get soft in the middle and my butt disappeared when I stopped working out over quarantine. My goal is to gain a booty and have visible abs again.
Self care and sleep. I've been protective of my sleep and have made an effort to get into bed a few mins before 10 pm. Having a wind down routine before bed has been helpful. Typical night time routine: I drink a cup of camomile tea, pop a magnesium glycinate pill, then I floss, brush teeth, scrap tongue, and mouth wash. Then I wash my face and do a night-time skincare routine. I take melatonin. I get into bed and rub lavender essential oil on my wrists. I set rain sounds on my phone and then drift off to sleep. I'd like to improve and add a night time yoga routine at the beginning to increase my flexibility and relaxation.

pallta · 2021-09-06T20:55:12+00:00

I'm trying to not hyper-focus on the faults I see in my appearance (causing a lot of anxiety lately) and trying to put my energy into more productive stuff. I made a list of all the traits I like about myself to boost my confidence.

ferociouslycurious · 2021-09-06T22:54:51+00:00

Signing divorce papers Tuesday. So far meeting a goal of walking at least 5 miles a day every day in September (total step count, preferably spread throughout the day).

Vmchik · 2021-09-06T21:01:47+00:00

I’m going to start studying for an IT certification in cloud services. I also get to meet some software developers that my mentor connected me to during my internship last week so I’ll get to meet people who could potentially help me get into software development.

preppykat3 · 2021-09-06T18:42:31+00:00

Get back into my fitness routine (I’ve kind of fallen off track)

Reading helpful books

Focusing on my college class

Meditation

Jezebel143 · 2021-09-06T21:28:45+00:00

Great timing OP, I had a mini milestone I was proud of this morning and wanted to share but felt no one in my personal life would understand. After reading self-help books my whole life and finally putting in therapy hours last year, I know that I can do better by journaling, but I’ve always been afraid because N-mom always threatened to find mine and read it so I stopped as a teen. Today I actually opened up a journal and put pen to paper and I immediately got a boost from getting my thoughts out of my head! Now I’m looking forward to making it part of my regular routine.

SpiteTomatoes · 2021-09-06T19:55:07+00:00

Nothing out of the ordinary, but continue to work on my education and studying hard. My TA position starts up again this week and will help me continue to learn how to be a better communicator and mentor- I'm working towards becoming a professor, I will be applying for grad school next fall!

What is the program you've been using? Sometimes I would rather walk than run and would love a walking program. I use Couch25k when I run.

Adventurous_River_64 · 2021-09-06T23:38:01+00:00

I am committing fully to at least a month without alcohol. I dumped all booze that I had in the house and stocked up on fancy sparkling waters and limes.

Yellowsunflowerlover · 2021-09-06T22:26:19+00:00

I start a new job tomorrow! 💖

lilac-hiraeth · 2021-09-06T23:50:50+00:00

Getting my kids ready and mentally prepared for a new school year on my own. It’s been a lot of work and money as a single mom but they all have new wardrobes, new supplies, enrolled in music lessons and upcoming interviews with their new teachers this week.

I feel like I’m a much better single parent than I ever was parenting with my ex husband. As someone who was child free before I had my (oops) babies, this was my worst fear, but actually living it, as a single parent, not at all what I thought it would be like. I’m good!

sofiacarolina · 2021-09-06T21:33:16+00:00

I’m finally fully committing myself to learning how to drive. I’m 28 and have what I believe to be undiagnosed ADD and dyspraxia which has made it super difficult to learn, but I’m giving it another try and not giving up this time. this is my second week of practicing and so far so good!

Repulsive-Ad1092 · 2021-09-06T21:57:59+00:00

I set these goals for myself this week: - Learn 10 irregular verbs and 5 key phrases in german - not throwing any food - Walking 10k steps at least 5 days - Getting better at email writing and documenting at work - Taking care of my nails and hands - Trying one more challenging posture in pilates - at least 2 cold showers - at least 5 days when I don’t leave any dish in the sink

soundslikeautumn · 2021-09-06T22:49:41+00:00

Getting my second vaccine. I'm homebound and had to go through our county's homebound vaccination services. It was a long process, but I was finally approved. I got my first Pfizer vaccine at home and I'll be getting my second one either the very end of this week or early next week.

waddamelone · 2021-09-06T20:11:24+00:00

1 I want to find a new job because my current one doesn’t make me happy

2 Start studying immediately after my classes so I don’t stress right before my exams

3 Get back into going to the gym

4 Have a consistent nighttime routine and sleep early

5 Clean my room

like_onomatopoeia · 2021-09-06T22:31:26+00:00

I changed my car battery, one light bulb and prepped my suv for camping. Yuss! Never fixed that sort of stuff by myself!

I’ll get my bike fixed this week (taking care of my assets) to go on a three-day mtb cross country adventure on my own in a National park as my birthday gift next month (super scared but so excited).

I am writing an inventory list of my short comings/fears. Am brutally honest with myself. Argh, that’s going to be a tough one.

I installed an irrigation system in my garden (it’s winter here) to have hassle-free veggies in summer.

Edit: also bought skin care products and will embrace my skin care routine.

BasketLow8411 · 2021-09-06T19:03:33+00:00

Committing to exercising 3-4 days this week. I’ve been sick and haven’t had care for my kids this last two weeks and I am so ready to jump back in to my favorite exercise!

ArugulaIsAwesome · 2021-09-06T22:53:16+00:00

I’m doing a big house clean today that has been needing to happen for several weeks now. I also hopefully get my test results back on a potential diagnosis for ADHD.

I’M SUPER EXCITED ABOUT IT!!

anama_deya · 2021-09-07T05:03:38+00:00

Finalky taking up a new job.

I’ve been in the recent company for 5 years now. It started off great, with peers and mentors lending to a healthy and encouraging workplace. I got to work with a HVW team lead who helped me identify what I want from my career and speak up more.

As time passed, there were lots of missed bonuses and delayed hikes, triggering a disconnect when higher management & leadership strategies changed frequently, triggering major exits. With this change brought a new reporting manager, and the team culture started going downhill.

One of the first instances I saw of sexism was where the manager would gloat about how he is facing a new challenge with an excess of women in the team. This was because all the men had quit the team at one point one by one. Looking back now, (and there’s an insightful post on TwoX about this) I realize my manager knew very well about the personal situation of the women in the team, and they wouldn’t be leaving soon.

We came to realize that women were being denied promotions and pay hikes. We heard reasons like “it's too early for promotion”, “not enough profits”, and “promotions come to those who wait”. Yet men, got promotions when they demanded for it and threatened to leave. Men were having business discussions in their outings to bars & basketball courts while women got assigned ‘housekeeping’ tasks like organizing birthdays. When we voiced our opinions, we would get sidelined and receive comments like “Oh well, I was about to ask you to organize lunch but then there would be complaints on ‘office housekeeping’ hUeHuEhUe” 😑

As I was facing frustration and considering changing jobs, the pandemic hit, and I bunkered down, like other team members. We would work through 12-14 hours a day. Soon enough, it turned into a one-upmanship challenge of ‘who could jump the highest’. Even I was falling into negative tendencies, staying always online for people to respond back to emails, organizing thankless ‘team building activities’ and ‘wearing multiple hats’ to lead a large team as a ‘temporary’ team lead, which ended up in massive overtime. The worst part came during my year-end review, where my manager told, “Well, I know you set up this brand-new project which saved our company X million dollars, trained a brand-new team in a remote work environment, got the CEO to endorse your skills, but even then, I can’t promote you because it isn’t the right time yet.” Later, I realized this was because the promotion went to another senior team member who was planning to leave, and he left anyway after four months.

Over time, this took a bad toll on my mental and physical health. I was sleeping and eating my meals at odd times of the day, glued to my desk, trying to catch up with other people who were skipping meals to get work done. I suffered breakdowns twice in a span of four months, with my thoughts turning so dark I confessed to my husband that I found life meaningless. It went to a point where I was getting nauseated and hyperventilating at the thought of logging in at work.

I found FDS around the same time. I started to get my life in order – putting my health and interests first, setting a strict work time and taking trainings to level up my skills. It didn’t go well with my manager and the higher ups who taunted my sticking to a regulated time as ‘not being a team player’ in a team meeting. The sad part was the team itself had run into a ‘work till you die’ mindset. When talking about changing the work environment, I heard things like ‘people are getting laid off, we're so lucky this team let us work from home during COVID’, ‘sure, we have to work on holidays and late nights for no extra pay, but I’m sure the manager feels bad’, or the defeatist, ‘all teams and companies are the same, better the devil you know’.

If I replaced ‘being in the team’ to ‘being in an abusive relationship with an LVM’, would I continue to carry on? This hardened my resolve to start looking for other opportunities, both within and outside the organization.

The final straw was when one of the HRs leaked my application for a higher role in another team which I had been asking my manager for from over two years. He killed my application and called me up in a rage saying, ‘How could you do this to me?’, going on about how irresponsible it was, and he would pull me out of all current projects. I had only applied for the job – there were no interviews set, no processes started, nada. After I responded back that I had been asking for a promotion to a lead role from over two years after unofficially handling the position and the frustration at interviewing incompetent people for the role I want to take up, he went back to saying, ‘all good things come to those who wait’ and that no one was stopping me to ‘influence’ decision making, that ‘positions aren’t important.’ Well, if it weren’t so important, why would a lead be paid more and get all the credit despite me handling all the work?

It reminded me of the rule of ‘never doing wife things for a boyfriend’. I was done doing ‘lead things’ when the manager made it clear that there are no openings for a lead role for me in the future. I put in the work, and soon landed a job for a lead role in another company with a good pay hike.

Finally, the time came when I gave my notice (here it’s a 3 months’ notice rather than the US standards of 2 weeks). It was the worst case of emotional manipulation and gaslighting I ever experienced. After saying, ‘oh, well I was planning to propose your name for a promotion, and it’s pending with HR’, he told me I was ‘taking the easy way out’, ‘betraying my family’ and being ‘too emotional’. I was ‘throwing away all the investment’ I had done in the organization and ‘wasting all the investment the organization has done’ on me. He went on to say I was quitting because I was ‘traumatized by harassment’, because ‘I don’t think you’re someone who’s going to risk working in some lowly startup or landed in a dream company’, and that I should ‘cOmMuNiCaTe’. He went on to moan about ‘why is everyone quitting even after I’m offering them promotions’ and how they’ve been ‘ungrateful’ even though he’s ‘sticking out’ for us. He also went on to say, ‘I don’t know why you want to leave the organization when they’re biased towards female employees in promotions, not that I mean they’re getting that promotion for free HuEhUeHue…’. When I asked him to clarify about my supposed promotion, he yeeted out the meeting saying, ‘it’s confidential’, that I needed to ‘cool down my emotions’.

He setup a meeting a few days later, where he dangled the carrot of a lead role, which he ‘made it happen by silently working in the background.’ Again, with no details on what benefits it would entail.

I know better than to accept it at this point.

This reminded me of the HVW tech lead I mentioned earlier, who had also quit after getting promoted to an upper management role. When I asked her why she quit, she said, “I always look for workplaces where I will be valued, where they know and show they’re happy to have me.”

So now I'm enjoying my notice period, giving trainings and handovers to other colleagues, working on my fitness and focusing on finally writing that book I always keep thinking of.

Typical_Candle_5627 · 2021-09-07T00:45:53+00:00

Creating my list of “non negotiables!” It’s in my head, but I’m starting a journal. Just put together some vision boards too. Back to basics for me!

kerean1997 · 2021-09-07T08:07:41+00:00

I am looking at flats to rent, I am moving away from my parents house because I'm starting my first office job and I'll be able to live alone!

xfelugirlx · 2021-09-06T20:21:04+00:00

Keep up with my healthy diet
Keep working out more time
Look for a new dress to go out with my friends:)
Watch movies that i like
Study

DarbyGirl · 2021-09-06T21:58:10+00:00

I am on vacation this week and my realtor has set up appointments to see four houses tomorrow and a couple more on Wednesday and Thursday!

Laur_mar · 2021-09-06T22:46:00+00:00

Catch up on my French lessons, revist my Spanish lessons as I've neglected them, log off social media to make time to read the (many) books I've bought

Risoa · 2021-09-06T23:30:12+00:00

I want to complete a work project, finish reading a few sober quit lit books and workout 4 times this week. I will feel so accomplished by Friday evening, I'm using that feeling as motivation for a successful week.

msromperstomper · 2021-09-06T23:57:48+00:00

I'm curating a show of feminist art by my students! They are so excited for this opportunity. I decided that for this school year I am going to divert all the care, attention, and resources that I would normally expend on LVM/NVM to young women, and I'm recruiting a bunch of mentors. It's going to be a great year!

hiphopanonymous98 · 2021-09-07T00:13:00+00:00

Prioritizing my side hustle- I’m underpaid at my full time job and using this to save/pay for an upcoming trip until I have my annual review where I will be asking for an 8% raise with data to back it up 🙌🏼

asianinindia · 2021-09-07T01:16:46+00:00

I'm thinking of joining a freelancer job site to start getting some work. Thanks to covid work has been bad with many companies shutting down so I'm thinking of doing this instead of just waiting for another job to workout.

LucyStar3 · 2021-09-07T03:46:20+00:00

I did a staycation with my bf after being long distance for the last one year. And it was wonderful! I needed the break from work and a change in scenery.

anotherdamnloser · 2021-09-07T04:40:42+00:00

Taking overtime to save for (hopefully) a trip next year to Hawaii if covid calms down. Or Alaska. LOL I’m determined to get to at least one of them next year. My goal is to see all 50 states, I’m at 34.

sevenmoonnight · 2021-09-07T05:14:36+00:00

I started meditating, i used to find meditation to hard to do because i am not good at visualizing but i've found this one thats basically focusing on your body, specially when around people, and just feeling your body and your presence and breathing and i feel better since starting. I realize i never felt very much in my body before, always in my head. And that's a big change for me.

ThrowRAshipsRhard · 2021-09-07T10:04:39+00:00

I have appointments with employment services to help me find a path to a new career. I'm hoping I can find something in coaching/teaching that I can afford to take and balance my incoming with my outgoings while I potentially look at a course.

I am also working on my journal that I want to use for the next year to get myself organised.

Theboredshrimp · 2021-09-07T10:44:59+00:00

I've been studying a little everyday, this week. I'm learning to confront my uncomfortable emotions and letting them flow by journaling them and separating them layer by layer in order to not dissociate and run away from life. For the past three days I was in bed at 10:30 pm, it took me 3 hours to fall asleep the first day but it's getting easier

RecentSprinkles5997 · 2021-09-07T14:15:27+00:00

Menu planning for the week so I have more nutritious meals , also hopefully learning the basics of using a sewing machine from a friend

lolmemberberries · 2021-09-08T01:25:21+00:00

Major apartment de-clutter and refreshing my wardrobe. I went to a swap a couple of weeks ago to get rid of clothing that I was no longer wearing and found some great, new to me pieces. Also found some cute things when I hit the clearance racks this weekend.

dancedancedance7 · 2021-09-08T05:15:48+00:00

I'm recommitting to a reasonable sleep schedule and getting 9 hours a day. It really helps with my work and mental health.

InterstellarNut · 2021-09-08T06:04:16+00:00

Working on rewriting a script and that’s bringing me a lot of joy! Taking a step back from the daily grind of work and nurturing the things that will sustain me long term.

pompommom31 · 2021-09-06T23:40:07+00:00

Being a better mom to my tween daughter. This means not being so distracted by outside crap and really being present for her and her unique experiences. She’s an amazing young woman and I want her to have the best of me.

Title	Leveling up this week
Author	TheNightWitch
Upvotes	325
Comments	112
Date	September 6, 2021 5:37 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pj48iz/leveling_up_this_week/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/leveling-up-this-week.1067706 https://theredarchive.com/post/1067706

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