Are you ugly?

disposable_pants · 2017-06-13T22:58:48+00:00

men have always had an easy time getting laid WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT

Then why do prostitutes exist? Why do dating sites exist? Why are there books out there about picking up women? How did TRP come about?

If all it took was having fun and talking to people, why is there still this huge demand for all of these services?

despisedlove2 · 2017-06-13T23:08:28+00:00

I am a 4. I think I qualify as being ugly.

I realized this fairly early in my life, but was fortunate enough to be able to stop obsessing about it as I took care of business as needed. I have always been intellectually busy and developed an understanding that my life was different from that of other people. Still, I had the bottled up BP delusions and more commonplace dreams that I unwisely expressed to my gf, fiancee and then wife.

After I got married, divorce raped, and discovered RP, I found that my ugliness had probably played a role.

As to what I have done to help fix it? Nothing really, except I have gotten a lot more serious about exercise.

I am reasonably tall and have always been strong, but in the last few years, I have put on fairly significant amounts of muscle. Women show a lot more interest in me, but that is more due to my work. As a former academic, and now involved in industry, you run into people who want something from you, and are willing to offer anything to get it. You learn to look past their transparent motivations and filter them out accordingly.

As to why I jacked up, it was for a different reason than chasing women. I realized more clearly after my divorce, getting past a near suicide, and the period of self reconstruction involved, that I was going to have to walk away from relationships since my dreams from an earlier period of my life were delusional. If I had to live out my days, especially my old age, alone, given how busy my life is, I needed to be healthy and completely self reliant. This point was brought graphically home to me 4 years ago when I went to the hospital for my annual, and had to delete my ex wife as my emergency contact. I had to convince the nurse to not insist on me providing the name of anyone there. Small thing, but it reminds you that there is no backup if you fail.

Excepting the family that raised me, the world has never cared for me, so I cannot afford to ever put myself in the position of a dependant. People are of course unreliable, and your needs and emotions are invisible to them, especially as someone ugly.

The calculus of life changes once you get past the self delusions of love, commitment and shared life, and realize how the cookie crumbles.

ByronicAsian · 2017-06-13T23:10:38+00:00

Yes , I do believe I am ugly/unattractive physically. Haven't asked a girl out in a decade since Middle School (the amount of times I had any sort of non school/work related contact with them can be counted on 1 hand over those 10 years). As one would expect, just like long term unemployment, things get harder the longer this goes on and you yourself become more and more demotivated.

GroovyEFS · 2017-06-14T07:19:13+00:00

Nah I'm roughly average by my own estimation.

I agree with your analysis as far as most guys on PPD go though. The extent to which they complain how impossible it is to get anywhere, they're either ugly or really socially awkward or both.

exit_sandman · 2017-06-13T22:58:06+00:00

Reads like femsplaining in action.

Drippyskippy · 2017-06-14T00:55:34+00:00

The OP is showing a perfect example of projection. Once again a woman is pretending to know more about the male experience than men.

absurdlivingghost · 2017-06-13T23:47:53+00:00

Yep. Every woman I've ever pursued has rejected me or blown me off, so I obviously wasn't attractive to them. The simplest explanation is that I'm physically unattractive, though I'm sure someone I've never spoken to before will be along shortly to inform me that the real problem is the awful personality that they're so sure I have.

I've tried working out but haven't had much in the way of "gains." I have a weird relationship with food that I don't feel like explaining right now and am pretty skinny. I'm getting a job soon and should have some money to expand my wardrobe, but I'm not holding my breath for it making any difference to my situation.

OurThrownAwayDreams · 2017-06-13T23:01:41+00:00

i dont know anymore, i guess you can say im ugly/average/normie

access to attractive people

no such access

the average person's ability to date

i have dated average looking girls so i guess im average

dating options for young people

not a lot of options tbh

sexual history and availability

been intimate with just 2 girls

the biggest problem i have deduced to is my height, being 5'7 asian is a bit tougher in the market esp when the average male in NA is taller than you. but whatever, i cant fix that shit.

a girl i was with told me i have a baby face, so i guess i'll look "okay" when im like 40 or something, anyways, decide for yourself

http://imgur.com/a/kL4vj

Kerb_Poet · 2017-06-14T01:46:16+00:00

Probably. Luckily I'm funny and like big chicks so it's all good.

alreadyredschool · 2017-06-13T22:58:30+00:00

Nope

the average person's ability to date

I have many acquaintances who are not ugly and even some that are called good looking by girls I know who can't even find a GF.

men have always had an easy time getting laid WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT. this means being social, initiating conversations and being fun to be around for women.

I also know guys who put in extreme effort. Still they get at max 3 girls in 2 years. They are not that ugly, only a bit beta i.e. not sexual enough, not sexual early enough. The being fun and cool is all nice and dandy, what's missing is sexual stuff.

if you were being honest right now, how many of you are ugly? What have your experiences been like? What efforts are you taking to be less ugly? Have they worked?

I was ugly (but that was years before accidentally finding TRP, thanks reddit's search function), was a horrible experience, night and day difference, effort - lose fat, yes worked.

NewOrder777 · 2017-06-14T00:02:56+00:00

That is a bunch of bullshit and probably written by a woman.

Most of the men who are social and fun to be around end up in the friend zone if they're not sexually (read: physically) attractive or rich.

If you really put in the effort to look your absolute best, you might get something, but its still going to be pulling teeth to get laid and you'll get lucky to bed 1 or 2 chicks a year at that.

voteGOPk · 2017-06-14T00:10:17+00:00

i am 5'5 male so ya, automatic ugly to opposite sex.

IIHotelYorba · 2017-06-14T02:53:37+00:00

Everyone should have some way to have looks just for a while so they can have girls tell them to fuck off, threaten them, pointedly ignore them, generally treat them like subhuman scum, and do all the things they clearly think doesn't happen when you have looks.

I'll make you a promise. Looks buys you a 30% better open, and in terms of attraction only, not comfort. That's it. You have to do everything else.

trail22 · 2017-06-13T23:14:48+00:00

I think the term ugly, is different from the idea that women want to have sex or go out with you. Someone can say to you your not ugly from a picture, but that's not the same thing as saying women are interested in you.

In the sense women don't want to have sex with me, that is trues. As far as what efforts, mostly different versions of what I did before. new social group, work out, approach...

Im growing a beard, thats different.

purpleppp · 2017-06-13T23:20:05+00:00

Some people aren't good judges of themselves. I don't like how my face looks but some people are ok with it so it's probably not too bad.

prodigy2throw · 2017-06-13T23:23:02+00:00

I honestly have no idea. I'm slightly taller than average, I have low bf and lift regularly, dress well and take care of my (slowly thinning) hair.

That being said, being an ethnic minority has its drawbacks as does poor skeletal and facial structure (Big nose, weak chin and jaw, unibrow that's gotta get trimmed).

I definitely try harder than the average guy without a doubt yet still barely get dates on tinder and okc although recently put a new pic where my physique is more on display and that has shot up my matches insanely.

Actually, fuck it no I'm not ugly.

Yangel · 2017-06-14T00:02:58+00:00

Yep. Been told to my face.

Also had a dude pretend to be suicidal only to demand I fuck him because I'm 'ugly and desperate'. 👌

Eastuss · 2017-06-14T07:03:59+00:00

men have always had an easy time getting laid WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT

Men aren't equal facing that EFFORT. Some may put lot of effort and get nothing compared to it.
Women have to put NO EFFORT whatsoever, they have to take care of their body and display themselves. This is 10% of men's efforts.
You have also to consider the amount of effort just to get your first success. I needed like 6 fucking yeaaaars. I was a lonely insecure incel for 6 years before I got decent social skills and confidence and start having 'consistent' success with women. (read higher success with dates, still doesn't mean having lot of dates, I was just better at scoring when I had an opening). I had to change my behaviour so much that any kind of feeling or surprise was gone for long, sex and love is almost purely mechanical now, I've never got to know what it was like to have sex or love when I needed the most.

What I look like doesn't even matter because all this is 90% my behaviour versus expectations of men.

I know plenty of men that are far more attractive than me, that are husband or FWB material, but this doesn't matter at all. You're right about the fact there's an effort to input, but you're totally undervaluing how much effort it takes.

hyperrreal · 2017-06-14T14:40:41+00:00

No not ugly, and I've swapped pics with a couple people on here. But then again, I don't whine about how hard men have it on PPD.

I will say that I know guys who try (genuinely try) to get laid, and they still fail. Mostly due to social awkwardness and lack of calibration. Edit: like, I think guys who are average-looking can fail if they don't have decent social skills.

Ercole-- · 2017-06-13T23:08:03+00:00

The ONLY reason I can think of that a straight man would not and could not get laid despite his efforts or (((perceived efforts))) would be if he were, in fact, ugly to women.

I'm a very good looking dude and I've been through a serious dry spell before. Women aren't exactly jumping at the chance to fuck a dude just because he ain't ugly. They have options. They'll even leave the opportunity for a hot guy on the table without thinking twice. I've only seen it happen a thousand times.

KrispyMcSockington · 2017-06-13T23:55:20+00:00

From what has been told to me by men, as well from just 28 years of observation, men have always had an easy time getting laid WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT.

Yes. But could you please not trivialize this. It isn't that simple. We don't want to return to the "men can easily fuck two different women a month if they work hard at it."

Also, if we're just a matter of being fun around women, a lot of men would have no problems or have no need to work hard at all. But when he gets rejected repeatedly (women have no idea how much) he doesn't even get the chance to be fun around anyone. I think women have this belief that he walks into a bar or social situation, immediately strikes up a conversation and gains the interest of a few women in a few minutes like a woman would around men.

I don't think you understand how genuinely tricky the affair is because you never have to approach. There is approach anxiety, knowing what to say, coming off as smooth instead of sounding like an idiot, giving the impression you are not interested but actually are interested in sex, gaining her approval by ensuring you meet her minimum requirements for attraction (having money, power, or social status as well as being good looking and a good dresser) and all she has to do is say yes or no. Then she gets to complain about all the men that hit on her who she didn't like.

Furthermore, where are these promiscuous women willing to engage in casual sex frequently with men who put in this effort? There are probably more men who desire casual sex than women, so where are men going to find these women? Point those horny young men in the direction of these women so the SMP wouldn't be such a shit show for the average guy. No one thinks of availability when they talk about men getting casual sex. He has to get rejected a lot just to get one woman to say yes. How many women have to avail themselves just so the hordes of average men can get laid after they put more effort in?

UhKhat · 2017-06-14T00:45:37+00:00

[deleted]

abicus4343 · 2017-06-14T01:18:20+00:00

Most men today do not have sex appeal. Being social, fun, etc is useless without sex appeal. Porn has basically destroyed men's sex drives and hence their sex appeal to women. Men come across as sexless eunuchs these days.

wub1234 · 2017-06-13T23:24:09+00:00

When I was younger I used to think I was ugly. I think that was almost entirely because I had acne when I was an adolescent.

Then later on I sort of realised that I'm not ugly, but I still felt it sometimes.

Then later on I completely accepted that I'm not ugly, but I would still bemoan my appearance as unsatisfactory sometimes.

Now I know that I'm not ugly because I get to kiss one of the prettiest women you will ever see. When this happens suddenly what you see in the mirror is more acceptable.

But regardless of whether this works out or not, I learnt a few things from it.

I learnt that when women say on here, and say in general, that looks aren't the most important thing to them, they actually mean it. Of course, I believed this anyway, but when it is demonstrated to you then you can't deny this any more.

I never thought I would have a chance with someone as beautiful as my GF, someone who is clearly better looking than me. But she dotes on me because I am the right guy for her and I bring the qualities to the table that she particularly values.

Another thing, again I knew this already, is that beautiful women don't float around on a cloud constantly reflecting on their own superiority to the rest of the human race. Some do, some have massive egos. Most have the same human failings that we all do, they have up days and down days, and they have days where they think they look crap (my SO thinks she has 'fat days', even though it would be literally impossible for my SO to look crap).

About a week ago, I went bowling with my SO, and there was a photo booth in the bowling alley so we took a few pictures together, and kept two each in our wallet and purse respectively. I look like a dog's dinner (warning: British expression) next to her! I could put our pictures on here, and half of you would go: "how the fuck did he manage to get her?!".

But she doesn't see that at all. She just sees someone that she values, that she enjoys spending time around, who makes her laugh, who challenges her, who stimulates her intellectually, and that elevates me above an average looking, run-of-the-mill guy.

I realise this is a long answer to the OP. But all I am basically saying is...

Don't beat yourself up.

Don't assume that anyone is out of your league.

Keep trying and never give up.

Princeso_Bubblegum · 2017-06-13T23:33:02+00:00

(((perceived efforts)))

stahp

StayAtHomeChad · 2017-06-14T01:39:54+00:00

I'm so ugly, and I'm not in the top 20% of men, so that makes me invisible to women. I walk into Sephora or Victoria's Secret and just start robbing them blind because non of the staff see me. I'm a 4" inch werewolf that wears a penis sleeve, what women would want me?

Ehh, in all seriousness I don't care too much about how I look, I'm awesome and I know it.

cxj · 2017-06-13T23:43:38+00:00

I'm physically attractive to girls into muscular white dudes with beards and tattoos. I'm not 10/10 by any means, probably like 7-8.

Maybe some girls from the IRC chat can vouch for me when we traded pics.

No idea how else I could verify this really, lol

Tyler_Gatsby · 2017-06-14T01:05:21+00:00

Not ugly, but your best bet to getting casual sex with women who aren't 1.5 you in mass, or crack heads is probably somebody else's woman.

I'm looking for a relationship, so need to up my socioeconomic status back to when I was a drug dealer to hopefully get relationship material women who don't have three kids. Yes, I have game too, but women just think they know they have an unlimited sea of options now, and no matter even if they do think you're cute- being able to have you just tells them they can find a you+more money out there somewhere. All they have to do is keep selling those duck faces beside your mug, showing that other man out there a guy like you says she's valuable enough.

AutoModerator · 2017-06-13T22:52:07+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

GoldPilot · 2017-06-13T23:09:33+00:00

I donno. Kinda. It's never really held me back in life, but I'm not the best looking dude.

I've never really thought about myself as ugly, but I'm not exactly Mark Wahlberg.

wtknight · 2017-06-13T23:20:34+00:00

men have always had an easy time getting laid WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT. this means being social, initiating conversations and being fun to be around for women.

You make it sound like this is very easy for almost any man. In fact, there are lots of men out there who are not ugly at all but have problems doing precisely the three things that you seem to think any man can do.

notworthmuch20xx · 2017-06-13T23:22:38+00:00

I'd say so but I'm not an impartial judge

Yangel · 2017-06-14T00:23:34+00:00

[deleted]

Love8Death · 2017-06-14T00:58:12+00:00

Your entire premise is flawed. Men don't need to be not ugly to get a decent woman.

I thought I was uglier than I am, to answer your question.

I suppose, when you get rejected and you've only ever been 'good' to someone, you presume it's because you're physically unattractive. What else makes sense when everything is supposed to make direct sense?

[deleted] · 2017-06-14T01:57:14+00:00

Ya I'm ugly and short ngl.

wattwatty · 2017-06-14T02:23:54+00:00

Yeah, I'm ugly. If you asked me that question and I had lived on a desert island for most of my adult life, I don't think I would say I'm ugly. But, empirically, it seems that I am quite unattractive. I get women ostentatiously and needlessly dramatically looking away from me when I pass them on the street, etc. If I find myself in some situation where complimenting my appearance would be somehow polite or socially appropriate (think -- I have on a suit, stylish shoes, and a fresh haircut), things get awkward and stilted fast.

I'm not disfigured or grossly obese. I think, therefore, that 1's, 2's, and 3's figure I couldn't possibly be interested in them. But, 4's and up are completely disinterested in me. As I said: Not just disinterested -- they are disgusted.

[deleted] · 2017-06-14T03:44:08+00:00

I'm like a 5. All I have going for me is that I'm kind of funny. But, when I was 20 my best friend then was a good looking guy that got it. I learned and took on a lot from him. Before that I was just another shy loser playing video games in my room all night.

QuestionablePresence · 2017-06-14T03:50:57+00:00

So yes, if you were being honest right now, how many of you are ugly?

Objectively speaking, I'm probably average at worst, not ugly. Yeah, there are things I could work on, many things, but I wouldn't dare to actually call myself ugly when I don't really have any physical deformities. However, "not ugly" is a very low bar to clear and I have a tough time believing any person could actually be attracted to me, not just find me "not ugly". And these insecurities kinda prevent me from making efforts or even (((perceived efforts))).

TheNicestDouchebag · 2017-06-14T04:11:38+00:00

I'm not ugly, but I was in my early-mid teens. And believe me there is a huge difference in how women treated me then versus now.

blametheboogie · 2017-06-14T05:28:33+00:00

I basically only got laid because of my looks when I was younger, my abilities at being social in the ways that women respond to were pretty terrible until I got in my late 20s.

Being social, initiating conversations that are interesting to women and being fun to be around for women don't come naturally to lots of guys. It requires a lot of work for shy or quiet natured guys to develop these abilities. This is one reason why lots of guys don't do well with women until they get a little older.

The average popular extroverted guy can easily do the things you described. What you call simply making an effort requires large lifestyle changes for lots of guys. You make it seem like these things are easy to learn, they're not.

I'm guessing that the guys who told you this are extroverted types who have very active social lives. The average guy doesn't have a very active social life where he will meet lots of women. The average guy has to work reasonably hard to get sex in a relationship much less getting casual sex. .

Entropy-7 · 2017-06-14T06:00:40+00:00

I have pleasant facial features and a dad bod, but I get by.

But there are guys with pocked-up faces who get all sorts of play based on their body or personality.

zerobones · 2017-06-14T07:37:29+00:00

I'd hesitate to call myself ugly. I dont have any issues with how i look personally and i think quite highly of myself.

However, i know for a fact people and women are disturbed by my appearance, i have quite severe scaring, both on my torso and quite badly on my face.

A big give away on how females view how i look is that my sisters and mom (i have two sisters) have set me up on blind dates with women who have learning disability's or are mentally ill in some regard. This was a big wake up call on how low on the sexual food chain i was being considered to be.

However, thats just how my sisters and mom view me. I dont have any issue in finding a girl and getting sex, my apperence is only ever mentioned in a negative light by people who i dont try to fuck, mostly due to the fact that thats the only part of me they get to see, whereas the women who im actively trying to impress get a different treatment.

ManSentHisOwnWay · 2017-06-14T08:57:45+00:00

I'd like to think I'm ugly. I'm probably just average tho, which somehow feels worse.

BPremium · 2017-06-14T11:21:58+00:00

Nope, Just dont have 6 pack abs and Im 30. And that effectively locks me out of any young thin girl market in my area. I cant wait to move. I have a potential job opportunity in Dallas, might consider that if it pays ok

sunkindonut149 · 2017-06-14T14:23:45+00:00

Are you ugly?

Why should it matter whether or not someone is "ugly"? I'm a skincare fanatic but that doesn't behoove my neighbor to piss away time in front of a mirror.

Does this improve the commonweal? Is it an obligation to look good for the public? Why should we not have sympathy for folks who can't get laid?

Should we as a society reward the vainest? What if we lived in a society that rewarded the most violent? Vanity might not be as bad but is it something we want to encourage in the population by rewarding them with human relationships?

says_harsh_things · 2017-06-14T14:46:29+00:00

One of these days ill put a pic of myself on imgur i can use to reply every time a topic ike this comes up.

LewisCross · 2017-06-14T14:48:40+00:00

From what has been told to me by men, as well from just 28 years of observation, men have always had an easy time getting laid WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT. this means being social, initiating conversations and being fun to be around for women.

Those things get you lots of female friends and make you a great beta orbiter. They don't get you laid, even when you're making herculean effort.

Koffing · 2017-06-14T15:01:05+00:00

Isn't having an easy time only when you put effort in an oxymoron?

RadaNotaTaakaDaPills · 2017-06-14T15:33:26+00:00

Growing up, I used to think I was average. Roughly a 5 on the 1-10 scale.

Then, passing through high school, I began to believe that I was perhaps less than average.

Then after graduating, finding a job, reddit, TRP, PPD, FA, incels, cringeanarchy, I can firmly say I'm probably pretty ugly with an unattractive personality to boot. I socialize out of obligation. I only initiate conversation because my bosses force me to. Trying to be fun simply puts off everyone around me but my most inner circle of friends. A 2-3 is terms of looks. Personality probably brings me down to a 0-1 in terms of attraction.

When I was still a kid in grade school and up, I would on more than one occasion have girls come up to me yelling "You suck" without any provocation. I remember points in time where there were school events to do folk dancing and my assigned partner would violently wince as I tried hold her in the dancing position. I don't even know why I did it, but I went to my high school socials and prom alone. I tried to dance. To have fun. However, all the dancing through the night only served to reinforce my own loneliness and worthlessness. Stupid me, I kept trying to put myself out there at my university days. Joined clubs for video games, board games, even parkour. Was invited into an honor society due to good grades and participated in several fundraising events for charity. Always the outsider, so matter how I tried to interact and talk. I should have learned the first times, but I still went to socials and dances. Try to invite girls on dates and dances. Simple rejection outright. I wonder how many people ever get to feel the crippling emptiness of being the lone dancer on the dance floor, trying to have a good time. However, the only thing present in the air is the pounding music from the DJ, inviting the somebodies to kick things off.

I do my best to keep myself clean faced and clean shaven. I keep a strict skincare regimen of cleansing and toning, adding regular exfoliation and masks to keep my face presentable. I buzz my hair every two months to keep professional appearances. Rather, I did. I've been working out regularly, though with a few lapses due to surgery, to keep fit. Weight lifting with running/biking on off days.

I can tell you, all my efforts don't work. I'm still ugly and unattractive. I'm don't even know why I keep trying to live or go to work. Every day I wake up, all I see is a walking piece of shit that shambles and stumbles through life. I'm so tired of living some times.

Now, I'm working out 6 times a week to finally gain some progress on my journey. Bulk up and cut down. Growing out my hair instead of cutting it and going for a trim soon. My goal now is simply to max out my appearances for my own vanity. My goal is to one day look in the mirror and say "That piece of shit in the mirror is the best piece of shit I can make. That 2 is now a 2.01."

My mother once told me that humanity deserves a clean face to look at. So, I'm going to give humanity the best, cleanest face I can give. But, I wish I could give it a beautiful face.

Begotten912 · 2017-06-14T20:11:49+00:00

Sounds dickish, but honestly, once in a while I will catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror and think wow, I am really good looking. I've never really thought of myself that way but it seems like what they say about men getting better looking with age is true.

InformalCriticism · 2017-06-14T21:17:11+00:00

No, but I don't even really have anything to weigh in, except I think it's strange that you say even average men don't need to have high effort. Well, I'm here to say any effort at all is high effort; there is no "low effort" unless you're naturally alpha; it's either a conscious decision to spit game or it's natural and "no effort".

As for "ugly", I mean, if you're a 2 in the face, you're going to have to put high effort out for a lot longer period of time, but I would say that's the only difference. High effort for a small amount of time for attractive males, and high effort for a long amount of time for the genetic unfortunates.

midnightvulpine · 2017-06-14T23:58:17+00:00

Ugly? To some folk, I'm sure. To most likely unremarkable.

[deleted] · 2017-06-15T22:56:11+00:00

Somewhat less attractive than average. Can get laid when making an effort.

lilpumpski · 2017-06-22T13:19:10+00:00

Yee very ugly

void_magic · 2017-06-13T23:49:26+00:00

men have always had an easy time getting laid WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT.

As long as your definition of men are those that women notice, this is true. I'm completely invisible.

Jex117 · 2017-06-14T02:06:07+00:00

I wasn't ugly per say, but from 18-20 I used to be 300lbs, lacked any resemblance of self-confidence, I slouched, went days without bathing, long greasy hair, no sense of fashion, no social skills, and no real skills in general. Looking at older pictures of myself, I wasn't ugly, but the way I carried myself and took care of myself made me completely unattractive. I cringe at my old pictures.

Now I'm 26, 175lbs, strongman physique, shaved head, black beard, plus all the skills, tools, and experience to do basically anything from home renovations and vehicle repairs, to commercial installations and carpentry. Two years ago I ran a 14-man crew, breaking down all the modular walls and cubicles for a 350 worker Corporate Office, packed it up on 4 big rigs, moved it to the other side of the city, unpacked and reinstalled it all in their great big fancy new Corporate Office downtown - brand new office building, wasn't even fully finished construction when we began our installs. I was in charge of work in conjunction with the construction crews, making sure my crew wasn't in their way, and getting their crews out of our way when needed. The feeling I got when we were done, taking my final walk-around the job site, packing up the tools, getting back to the Shop with my crew, sitting around the warehouse, lighting up a few joints and cracking open some beers with the boys. That sense of accomplishment, tackling a monumentally insurmountable task, and knocking it out of the park - it was absolutely life changing. I'll be riding that high until I die.

Up until the last two years or so I've never really made any genuine efforts to improve myself, except my decision to drink water when I'm thirsty, rather than iced tea & orange drink. Honestly? This all happened as a result of simply picking physical jobs. Not hard jobs - just physical. Getting on a great crew of guys, learning new skills, building up my confidence one task at a time, getting tested, thrown to the flames, and coming out on top of it each time, getting better with every obstacle. Work made me the man I am today, and I'm proud of it.

The weird thing is I haven't quite gotten used to my sexy man-bod yet. I'm hot. At least that's the impression I've been getting. I've begun catching women checking me out on the regular - the kind of women who never even used to glance at me. The kind of women I got used to being invisible to. I've had women awkwardly try to start conversations with me in social situations, upon realizing I wasn't going to make any effort to chat them up. I've noticed women dropping obvious flirt ques during what I simply thought was casual conversation - I keep getting these "Oh, wait, is she hitting on me?" moments. I've also noticed guys sometimes get defensive when I talk to their girlfriend, something I simply never experienced when I was fat and greasy.

nyjl · 2017-06-14T04:54:53+00:00

men have always had an easy time

WHEN MAKING AN EFFORT

Damn i lold.

Mr_Smoogs · 2017-06-14T13:44:40+00:00

I've been told I am quite attractive and am currently in a relationship with a very attractive woman.

I agree with you, when making an effort into your SMV and RMV, you can easily get laid, especially if you start with as a good looking man to begin with.

I took many steps to be less ugly though. Gym everyday and focusing on my career and social game. More effort than most women would ever appreciate or acknowledge.

bornredd · 2017-06-14T14:31:16+00:00

I thought I was ugly for most of my life - like a 3-5.

Turns out I was a 6 without effort and now that I am lifting and manage my appearance I am a solid 8 (10 to certain gothy/scene girls).

Finding girls was never difficult - but they always seemed to be landed in spurts. I would meet a girl, start seeing her, and then cheat with 3-4 more. Then we would break up and I would be single for a month or two, repeat.

I have been faithfully married now for well over 10 years. Got fat after some surgeries but am back in shape now and look the best I ever have.

Title	Are you ugly?
Author	Sunhappy_DC
Upvotes	20
Comments	372
Date	June 13, 2017 10:52 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/6h3ikc/are_you_ugly/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-you-ugly.267602 https://theredarchive.com/post/267602

Comments