I recently had a lot of very interesting discussions based on a thread about how people view the dating market and how that affects their view of themselves. One argument really stuck in my mind, basically saying that you will be likely bluepilled if you stem from a stable family and have lots of stable relations throughout your life, while you more likely be redpiller if you experienced a lot of divorces and separations when you grew up. That’s why I’m interested in the following questions:

What pill do you believe in? How old are you? Did your parents divorce when you grew up? Does your social circle today consist mostly of people that come from divorced households or those from rather stable families? Do you have experienced stable relationships yourself?

I’ll start and keep it quite briefly. I’m mid-thirty and would describe my belief as somewhat bluepilled, or at least opposed to red pill in many aspects concerning the influence of evolution on our decision making. I grew up with parents who are still together in a loving relationship today. There are almost no divorces in my family (I remember one which took place before I was born), same goes for the families of my close friends and former and current spouses. Their parents are all still together or, in a few cases, separated after their kids were already grown up for a long time.

When I look at my relationships, they were all with people who also came from stable families (and there’s not one of my exes where I’d say I would have preferred to not meet them in the first place, I still like to think back sometimes, as we mostly separated unanimously). I never thought about that consciously until that discussion I mentioned yesterday. I wondered if I might have subconsciously preselected my social circle in that regard.

The more I think about it, the more I am convinced that this isn’t just a coincidence, as the red piller I debated with said he mostly experienced that relationships end in separations. So what does it look like with you? And do you think that had a big influence on how you think about dating?

Edit: Some of you took the effort and further explained some of the economical and social conditions under which they grew up, so I thought I take up on that.

My parents knew each other about half a year before my mom got pregnant, so they did what people did in the 80s and got married. They were both working class and just started their jobs, so I grew up in I guess a somewhat upper lower class household whose financial conditions got better and better over time until my parents could afford a house when I was almost finished with school. I experienced a very loving relationship that depended a lot on communication, I can remember my parents talk all evening long about some topics, which transitioned to us kids (I have two younger siblings) - all of us like to talk a lot when something’s on our mind. Despite all those discussions everyone in my family somehow manages to maintain the feeling that, whatever happens, we’ll stay a family. That has been quite reassuring all my life.